01x14 - Grim or Gregory?/Grim vs. Mom/Tastes Like Chicken

[bunniefuu]

Hahahaha!

Avert your eyes.

Aah!

Spencer, you're back!

Aah!

I know. I love you, too,

But it's
a forbidden love.

What? No!

Woman:
what will we do?

Spencer: aah!

Yeah. I'll love
you forever!

No! Eat her!
Don't hug her!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

I am a mummy made out
of toilet paper.

Hee hee hee hee!
Spooky, huh?

I can't see!

Hold still.

Ok.

Hi. It's me again--

Atrocia, your personal
hostess of horror,

Bringing you an all-night
halloween scarathon.

Atrocia, you've
stolen my heart.

Good thing I've got

Aah!

Let's go get
some candy, people.

Hey, mandy,
what are you supposed to be?

I am a ruthless,

High-priced
prosecuting attorney.

Then, what's
with the claws?

They're for rending
human flesh.

[Imitating ghost
howling]

Aah!

[Evil laughter]

h* h* h*!
h* h* h*!

This house
is too scary.

Bah! You wouldn't
know scary

If it came up
and ate your faces off.

A house that overdone
is bound to have
jumbo candy bars.

Jumbo candy bars?!

Trick or treat!

Why don't you stay here
with your cousin?

I think you're
a little too old
for trick-or-treating.

[Scoffs]

Atrocia?

Mmm. Chicken wing!

Hey! That other guy
is moving in on my lady.

One more house, then
straight to bed, gregory.

Thanks, mommy.

Excuse me. Do you
have a bandage?

Because I scraped my knee
falling for you.

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

I--i thought you
were somebody else. I--

Gregory, you scared
the cannoli out of me.

Oh! Now, let's get you
into bed, sweetie.

But you looked
like atrocia, and--

Excellent. 2 Blammo bars
and a sour beefy.

I got the rock.

Hey, where's grim?

There he is.

Hey, grim.
Let's go, buddy.

I'm your buddy?

Yeah! We're amigos
forever, remember?

Billy,
that's not grim.

Oh, grim's
my bestest friend!

Whatever.

You're hurting me.

♪ La la la la
la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la
la la la la ♪

Ooh, I love bubbles!

[Knock on door]

Oh, gregory, honey,

Are you almost done
with your bathy-wathy,
greggy-weggy?

Oh!

Give me a minute,
woman.

This so-called bathing
is kind of enjoyable.

Hey, mandy,
grim's better than ever.

That's not grim.

Grim gave me
a candy bar.

What makes you so
sure that's grim?

Yes!

Uh, I'm just
wondering how grim
got so short.

But he's got
a scary face
just like grim's,

So I win.
He's grim.

I hope my little man's
all nice and clean.

Look, lady. I'm not
who you think I am.

Now, gregory,
don't you want
to take that mask off

While I read you
a bedtime story?

Bedtime story?

Oh, can I wear it
just a bit longer?

Well, it is halloween.

Yay!

Mommy loves her
little munchkin.

Yes, she does.

Ok. I'll trade you
one chocolate ear

For 2 twizzle pops.

Ooh! Ooh!
Give it here!

Since you are now grim

And therefore
have no stomach,

I claim all
of your candy.

[Sobbing]

Aw, see what
you did, mandy?

You made grim cry.

I'll let you know
when I start to care.

[Crying]

Hmm.

I know something
that would cheer him up!
Head football!

Huh?

And billy goes back
for the pass!

Mandy: billy.

Huh?

[Sobbing]

Grim cut off some kid's
head and stuck it
on his shoulders!

"Poodie and yum yum
loved all the animals
in the world.

"They loved elephants,
bunnies, and chickens,

"And even
the lowly giraffe.

The end."

I love you, gregory.

I--i love you,
too...mommy.

[Doorbell rings]

Oh, dear.
More trick-or-treaters.

Mandy: excuse me.
Does this belong
to you?

Aah!

Mommy!

Gregory! But i--
but you--

But--but if
you're gregory,

Then who is--

Aah! Aah!

Atrocia:
well, boys and ghouls,

It just goes to show

No matter how much

Of a terrible, ugly
monster you are,

You can always find
someone who will love you.

Happy halloween, kiddies.

Hope you enjoyed the show.

Bah, humbug!


Hee hee!

Oh, yeah!
Hee hee! Yay!

I win! I win!

I can't believe it!
I won!

[Clucks,
kiss kiss kiss]

Mmm!
It's mine.
It's mine.

Look, mandy.
Look what I've got.

I'll bet you're jealous.
Look at you.

You're so jealous
that your eyes hurt so much

That they're about
to explode on the inside,

Leaving you
physically scarred

Like some pus-filled monster
blinded for life

From the jealousy
you have for me!

In fact, all the smartest
scientists in the world
wouldn't be ab--

It means
you go to jail.

What?

[Crying]

Go to jail?

I don't want
to go to jail.

You mean, I don't
get a big house?

[Knock on door]

Don't worry about it.
I'll get it.

[Gasps]

Uh, honey.

You're back.

Are you feeling ok?

I'm wonderful.
Never been better.

I just needed
a little vacation

After my skeleton
episode.

Dear,

There's someone
I'd like you to meet.

This is billy's
friend george...

Or grimy
or something.

[Whimpers]

[Roars]

Pleased
to meet you, grim.

This food looks
mediocre.

Why, thank you,
mandy.

So how was
school today?

You'll never guess
what happened.

[Mouth full]
this kid has this special...

[Muffled]

...but she didn't listen.
Hee hee hee.

[Mouth full]
he took one bite

And spit it
all over this wall.

Everyone started
laughing at him.

Ha ha ha ha!

The janitors tried
to scrape it off,
but couldn't!

Ha ha ha ha!

Billy says it was ok.

[Growls]

[Sweetly]
mind your
manners.

Please ask
for someone to
pass the salt.

Mandy,

Could you please
pass the salt?

So then
one janitor said,

"This looks like
a tough one." Hee hee!

So all the kids started
eating it off the wall.

[Slurps]

After, all the kids
got sick,

But not me, and I even
went for seconds.

I guess I showed them.
Hee hee!
[Slurps]

Yaaah!

We don't put
our elbows
on the table.

I still think
your mom's cracked.

Like the back end
of a plumber.

Honestly, man,
I think the woman
has it out for me.

Look, billy,

Someone's scared
of your big bad mom.

Grim's about as grim
as one of those
marshmallow bunnies.

Hee hee hee!

Cut that out!

I don't know
what you're
talking about.

♪ Grim's a big baby,
grim's a big baby ♪

Hee hee hee!

You're both
being obnoxious.

I am not scared
of billy's mom.

That's preposterous

To think that i
would be terrified
of anybody's mother,

But that's
just lame.

I'm going to
the kitchen to get
a glass of water.

Mom: hello, grimy.

I've been waiting
for you.

It's payback time

For chasing me out
of my house!

But...

Stay away from my baby!

He's allergic
to the undead.

Uh, madam, I don't think
you understand--ooh!

Ow! Do you know where
that mop has been?

Foolish mortal.

I don't think
you know who I am.

Let me give you a hint.

[Teeth chatter]

Grim: ask not
for whom the bell tolls.

It tolls for thee.

Let's kick it
up a notch.

Whoa!

[Crash]

Hey!

You almost hit me
with that.

Now, was that
really necess--ouch!

Hey! Come on! Ooh!

Is that your best shot?

Hey! W-what happened?

Who turned off all the--
ah...ah...

Ah...choo!

[Pants, sniffs]

[Growling]

[Monkey screeches]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Billy: mom?

What's going on?

Uh...um...

Well, I'm afraid
your friend grimy

Had a bit
of an accident.

I was trying
to help poor grimy
pull himself together.

Perhaps you and mandy
can help grimy

Into the garbage can.

Alas. Poor grim.

I knew him, billy.

Shut up!

Oops.

Ouch!

Give me that!

Billy's mom
sure did
a number on you.

She may have won
the battle,

But she has not won
the w*r!

Ow!

[Number dials,
line rings]

Recording:
hi. This is irwin.

I can't come
to the phone
right now.

I'm in-in-
indisposed.

But you can leave
a message
at the beep.

[Beep]

Hey, irwin,
are you there?

It's me--billy.

If you're there,
pick up the phone.

Answer the phone,
irwin!

I know you're there!

Irwin? Irwin!

Irwin, irwin, irwin,
irwin, irwin...

[Draws deep breath]
irwin, irwin,
irwin, irwin...

I bet you're not
indisposed at all, irwin.

I bet you're just
sitting on the--

[Dial tone]

Hmm.
Guess he's not there.

Hey, mom, will you fix me
a jelly sandwich

With peanut butter
and pickles and fish sticks

And some of those
little wieners and ketchup

And bologna
and bananas and tofu

And tuna and pig knuckles
and--mom?

Mom? Hey, mom?

Where are you?

A sandwich here!

Strange.

First irwin is missing,

Now mom.
[Gasps]

You in there, mom?

Maybe the whole world
has been abducted by aliens,

'Cept me!

I wonder if they got dad.

Dad? Hey, dad!

Are you in the garage?

Hey, daddio?

Where are you?

Hey, dad, I'm playing
with the power tools.
Ok, thanks.

Where is everybody?!

[Crickets chirping]

Grim:
what's the ruckus?

Grim! What are you
doing on the roof?

I'm bleaching my bones, man.

Dig my pearly whites.

One coconut fizz.

Marvelous.
Thank you.

Oh, my pressure,
your lowness.

[Slurping]

Billy: grim!

Have you been playing
with your sickle again?

[Gasps]
where's mom?

No more cookies,
billy.

Billy: and dad?

Leave your mitts off
my power tools.

Billy: and my
best friend irwin?

Stop calling me,
you dweeb.

That's it!
I'm too late!

[Crying]
stupid irwin.

[Gasps]

Billy, I never touched
your parents.

But if it wasn't you,
then who?

[Loud burp]

Mandy!

Mandy?

Hanging out in the alley.

Figures.
[Burps]

Excuse me.
Must have been
something I ate.

Girls burp,
which reminds me,

I'm having you
for dinner today, billy.

Be there at 6:00.
You too, bonehead.

[Burps]

[Tires screech, crash]

Now I know
where everyone went.

Mandy ate 'em
for breakfast,

And she wants me
for dinner!

Yep. Seen this before.

I wonder what she had
in that box.

Probably a head!

She's saving it
for dessert!

What am I going
to do? Aah!

Whoa.
Slow down, billy.

Let's not jump
to conclusions.

First, you need proof.

Right.
The smoking glove.

Come on, grim.

Billy: grim!

Shh!

Look what I found
in mandy's trash.

Bones,

And they're all yucky
and covered with ants.

Those are chicken bones,
you simp.

How do you know?

Trust me.
I know my bones.

Aaah!

Shh!

Over here.

[Bones clatter]

Mmm.

[Thud]

Billy, get up.

She ate his brains!

Shh!

Let's get out of here.

Hmm.

Hey, grim,
what's with all
the weird tiki crud?

Looks like some sort
of south-sea soiree.

What's that mean?

Bunch of cannibals
throw a party to eat
the neighbors.

Huh?

Huh?

Quick, hide
in those bushes.

Billy: careful
with that sickle.

[Both whimper]

Time to throw the shrimp
on the barbie.

Yeah.
Ha ha ha ha!

You are definitely
on the menu.

[Door opens]

It's mandy,

And she's got
the box.

Billy!

Billy: mandy!

Billy, just on time.

Whose head is in the box,
you cannibal?

Head?

Yaaah!

Aaah!

Whew.

Aaah!

[Tribal chanting]

Hey, it's
a chocolate cake!

Mmm!

[Gasps]

All: surprise!

Happy birthday, billy!

It's a birthday tiki
party/luau thing, son.

Mom, dad,

And all my friends,

You weren't eaten
after all,

Except...where's irwin?

[Loud burp]

[Crunch]

Hmm.
Irwin's glasses.

How do you suppose
these got in there?

[High-pitched scream]

[Gasps]