01x04 - Objects d'Heart

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

Hi, Dinah.

I got a letter
from my pen pal Yvette. See?

You can tell she lives in France.
Even the stamp is elegant.

Wow. Look at all the stuff
she likes to do.

Ballet, soccer, reading, gymnastics,

horseback riding and computer games?

[meows]

Yeah, well,
maybe you're not impressed, but I am.

I mean, what isn't she good at?

But so what?
I'm good at some things myself.

Like this, for instance.

[mystical music playing]

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here
On the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme, and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

Perhaps a nice walk in the forest.

-Been there.
-Oh.

How about a game of cards?

-Done that.
-Oh. [gasps] Oh!

I could help you
finish off those delicious tarts

left over from last night's dinner.

-Ate them.
-All of them?

I want something to do.

I can't stand just to sit.

Uh-- Uh, don't blame yourself,
Your Majesty.

Even a queen can't stand and sit
at the same time. [chuckles]

Oh.

I meant I'm bored out of my crown.

In that case, Your Highness,
what you need is an interesting activity

to do in your spare time.

Oh. You need a hobby, Your Majesty.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ Well, even a queen
May have an idle afternoon ♪

♪ That she would like to fill up
Very soon ♪

♪ You simply need a royal recreation ♪

♪ For your oh-so noble situation ♪

♪ A hobby, Your Highness
Would suit you just fine ♪

♪ Collecting stamps from exotic places ♪

♪ Or how about coins
Stamped with ancient faces? ♪

♪ Raising goldfish ♪

♪ No? Maybe red fish ♪

♪ Uh, small fish? ♪

♪ Maybe no fish ♪

♪ How about gardening? ♪

♪ Perhaps bowling ♪

♪ Or maybe knitting
Or something more fitting? ♪

♪ Horseback riding ♪

♪ The fun, you see, is in deciding ♪

♪ On a hobby, Your Highness
Fit for a queen ♪

♪ Trading gum cards
Or raising orchids? ♪

♪ Bird-watching? ♪

♪ Crossword puzzles? ♪

♪ Playing bridge? ♪

♪ Tennis doubles? ♪

♪ You need a hobby, Your Highness
Fit for a queen ♪

Of course, those are just suggestions.

Utterly unoriginal suggestions.

Completely without creativity.

Creativity. That's it.

I shall find a hobby that helps me
to uncover my hidden creative talents.

I shall become an artist.

-[quirky music playing]
-[chisel tapping]

-How much longer, Your Majesty?
-[Red Queen] Quiet!

I'm trying to concentrate.

Don't move a muscle! Don't even breathe!

[inhales]

Taking up sculpting
has been such a wonderful experience.

I see the world in such a different way.

What a truly rewarding hobby.

So relaxing.

So stimulating.

Like a breath of fresh air.

There, all done.

[gasping]

So, what do you think?

[screams] Oh...

-It's, um--
-I know what you mean.

It leaves you breathless.

Something like that, yes.

-Hey. What's that?
-[gasps]

[whispering indistinctly]

-No way.
-You've got to be kidding. [chuckles]

Hatter! Hare!

What do you think of my sculpture?

Uh...

It's amazing, Your Majesty.
It's so much more than...

Than...

And yet not too much more than...

And certainly a lot less than... uh...

What can I say?

It represents all rabbits.

-And yet no rabbit at all.
-Exactly.

It's the very essence of rabbitness.

You two like it that much?

Oh, I may not know much about art,
but I know a bunny when I see one.

Then I shall give it to you.

I beg your pardon. For a moment there,

I actually thought you said
you were giving your statue to me.

But I am.

In fact, I think it would be just darling
as the centerpiece on the tea table.

My tea table?

Oh, my. You really shouldn't.
Seriously. I mean it.

It wouldn't be right.
You must have grown fond of it yourself.

Aw, don't be silly.
I can make another one.

[all shudder]

Now I shall sign my name to it for you.

Rabbit, the royal goggles.

[Rabbit spluttering]

Now the royal jackhammer.

Stand back!

[jackhammer drilling]

[all grunting]

[all coughing]

Ahh.

Congratulations.

You are now the proud owner
of an original queenly creation.

[both grunt]

You had to let her think
you liked this thing, didn't you?

I assumed the queen would want it herself.

She's never been generous before.

-Is anybody up here?
-Just us art collectors.

What in the world is that thing?

-What thing?
-That thing you just dropped.

Oh, that? It's a sculpture.

-A what?
-A statue. A statue.

-Gesundheit.
-Handmade by the queen just for me.

Um, no offense, Mr. Hatter...

but did it look like that
before you dropped it?

For your information,
this is a stately stone statue.

A carefully crafted carving.

A magnificent monolithic
modern masterpiece.

Amazingly awesome alliteration.

So you're stuck with it, huh?

You got that right.

But at least up here,
we won't have to look at it.

Well, why do you want to hide it?

I'm sure it's good
for all kinds of things.

Just think creatively.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ It's no beauty, that is true ♪

♪ But there's a thousand things
That you could do ♪

♪ You could use it to dry laundry
Or maybe grind some corn ♪

♪ If you hollowed out the inside
Then a pet could call it home ♪

♪ Looks like you're stuck
But it shouldn't be too hard ♪

♪ To come up with some uses
For this royal work of art ♪

♪ You could dress it as Godzilla
To keep burglars from your home ♪

♪ You could use it as an anchor
For a big ship in a storm ♪

♪ You could maybe pay an uncle
To take it off your hands ♪

♪ You're stuck with this nuisance
But you can't lose heart ♪

♪ There's 1001 uses
For this royal work of art ♪

♪ It's no beauty, that is true ♪

♪ But there's a dozen hundred thousand
Million billion trillion ♪

♪ Things you could do ♪

You're right, Alice.
This is a very useful statue.

Therefore, I suggest we bury it--

I mean, store it up here for safekeeping

until we decide
exactly what to do with it.

Or until the end of time.
Whichever comes first.

Oh, I forgot to tell you.
I saw the queen on her way over here.

She said something about stopping by.

[both] What? She's coming over here?!

[frantic music playing]

Ah!

What a perfect spot for your statue.

If I may say,
it does wonders for this area.

Yes. It's a wonder that it's here.

[Red Queen chuckles]

Ah, just think,
every single day when you sit down to tea,

your statue will be here,
looking over your shoulder.

Yes, just think.

So, what do you think
of my little creation?

Well...

it's really... big?

Isn't it? But you do like it?

Well, I can honestly say...

that it's not like anything
I've ever seen before.

Then I'll tell you what.
I'll make one for you too.

Me? No, really, you shouldn't.

Oh, now, now. I really don't mind.

They're not as hard to make as they look.

If you've got the talent.

Don't look so glum, Alice.

Think of it as your chance
to start two new hobbies.

-Two?
-Sure.

Collecting art and collecting rocks.

[playing upbeat tune]

[playing upbeat tune]

Oh, that's okay. Don't mind me.

Too late. I've lost my inspiration.

Inspiration? What do you mean?

My mood. That which inspires me.

My emotional reason
for wanting to create music.

The thing I had before I was interrupted.

Sorry.

Too bad the queen's inspiration
doesn't go away that easily.

The queen?

She's decided to become an artist,
and, boy, is she inspired.

What kind of art does she create?

Well, it's really...

big and heavy.

You mean "heavy"
as in deep and meaningful?

No. I mean as in weighs a lot.

She carves statues out of stone.

I'm afraid she's gonna give one to me.

Do you like the statues?

Well, not actually.

But because she's the queen,
you won't tell her what you really think.

That's true.

Well, then,
I have a story I think you should hear.

Once there was a dinosaur
who loved to munch on trees.

-Pines, palms, oaks and elms.
-[sniffs] Hmm.

[Caterpillar]
He was a regular tree gourmet.

But one day, after the dinosaur
ate a forest for a midday snack,

he ended up with a tree branch
stuck between his teeth.

He didn't know it was there,

and his friends were too polite
to tell him.

Later that day, the dinosaur went
to get his driver's license.

He passed the test with flying colors.

But when it was time
to get his picture taken...

he still had the branch
stuck in his teeth.

And still everyone was too polite
to say anything.

So when his license came in the mail,
he was horrified.

The picture was terribly embarrassing,

but there was nothing he could do

because the license didn't expire
until he became extinct.

I see what you're saying,

but telling the queen what I think
isn't the problem.

I'd say it is.

Since you didn't say her statues are bad,
she assumes you think they're good.

Well, good or bad, I'm getting one.

You assume you're getting one.
You don't know for sure

Personally...

I wouldn't worry too much.

The queen tends to be a bit forgetful.

Hey, maybe you're right.
Maybe I'm worried for nothing.

Uh... thanks, Your Majesty...

but I was thinking, it's not really fair
for you to give the statue to me.

I mean, I'm not here all the time.

Oh. But you can enjoy it when you visit.

Yes, but, well...

wouldn't it be better
to give it to someone else?

But I can't give it to someone else.
It would break your little heart.

I'll try to be brave.

Wait. I've got it.

-You do?
-Yes.

Instead of taking away your statue,
I'll make enough of them for everyone.

For you.

Thank you,

but... you shouldn't have.

And for you.

Thanks, but you shouldn't have.

They're not so bad
once you get used to them.

Not so bad? They're awful.

Come on. Look on the bright side.

What bright side?

We could have three of them.

[rapping] ♪ Take a look a second time ♪

♪ In a certain light
They're quite sublime ♪

♪ They're not so bad
Just a heavier form of art ♪

[rapping]
♪ I took a look, and what did I see? ♪

♪ Two rock rabbits
Nothing like you and me ♪

♪ We'd be better off
If they were left underground ♪

[chuckles]

♪ But have you noticed
Their attributes lately? ♪

♪ They're stable and solid
And sturdy and stately ♪

♪ Big and bulky, heavy
And, well, big ♪

[singing]
♪ Make the best of what you got ♪

♪ You might find so bad it's not ♪

♪ Just look on the brighter side
Of it all ♪

[both singing]
♪ Make the best of what you got ♪

♪ You might find so bad it's not ♪

♪ Just look on the brighter side
Of it all ♪

[rapping] ♪ I think I see
What you're trying to say ♪

♪ They grow on you
In a funny sort of way ♪

♪ They're not so bad
It's all in your attitude ♪

-♪ If you open your mind ♪
-[rapping] ♪ And if you open your heart ♪

[both] ♪ You just might like
These objects of art ♪

[singing] ♪ If you look for the good
In what you got ♪

♪ It's not so bad ♪

Maybe you're right.

Maybe if we look
at these statues long enough,

we could learn to love them.

[both] Nah.

Let's hide them in the trees.

[both grunting]

[all yell]

-[ground rumbling]
-[Red Queen gasping]

Pick up those statues.

We have a delivery to make to the Duchess.

[gasps]

Oh, my beauties!

You've ruined them!
Such delicate creations.

Fragile as butterfly wings.

And you treat them
like worthless slabs of stone.

Well, perhaps the Duchess won't notice
that the statue is...

um, slightly broken.

The fact that the woman wouldn't know odd
if it fell on her is not the point.

I am not the kind of queen
that gives worthless gifts.

No, of course not, Your Majesty.

We're really sorry, Your Majesty.

We don't deserve
to own any of your lovely statues.

-We're too careless.
-You should take them away from us.

And, in fact, they're so valuable,

you should take them away
from everyone before more get broken.

But where would I put them?

In a museum or...
Or, better yet, in a sculpture garden.

Displayed for everyone's enjoyment,
yet preserved safely for the ages.

For the ages, you say?

A special place
just for my little statues?

It's a wonderful idea.

-Shall we make the arrangements?
-Immediately.

We'll have a dedication ceremony
this afternoon. Oh!

Well, if I do say so myself,

Well, if I do say so myself,

I think I found
the perfect little spot for these statues.

-Far away from everyone.
-Yeah!

And it sure was handy
the way it was already fenced off.

-[liquid burbling]
-Say, Hare...

are you growing shorter?

I do have a sinking feeling.

The ground here seems to be very soft.

Look at this sign I just found here.

"Danger. Quicksand."

[all] Quicksand?!

Quicksand?!

[frantic music playing]

Whoo! That was close.

We accidentally set the statues
on quicksand.

[all gasp]

[Alice] Oh, no.

There go the statues.

The queen better get here soon...
or we're sunk.

Oh. In more ways than one.

[all murmuring]

Hey. Here she comes.

Oh! [panting]

When you said you'd--
You'd pick an out-of-the-way spot,

I had no idea
you meant this far out of the way.

[all laugh]

Don't you see, Your Majesty?

It's safer this way. [chuckles]

Well, it is a lovely spot.

Made even lovelier, Your Majesty,
by having your statues... in it.

I couldn't agree more.

[upbeat rumba music playing]

♪ My statues bring you joy
And touch your very soul ♪

♪ Each one a royal masterpiece
Beautiful and whole ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
Original and new ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
I made them just for you ♪

[all] Limbo!

-[all whooping]
-[Red Queen trilling]

♪ My statues bring you beauty
They're priceless works of art ♪

♪ They bring you tons of happiness
Straight from my heart ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
Original and new ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
I made them just for you ♪

[Red Queen whooping]

♪ My art is just the answer
It's really what you need ♪

♪ It offers inspiration
With that you can succeed ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
Original and new ♪

♪ Every piece a masterpiece
I made them just for you! ♪

Exactly how we feel, Your Majesty.

Now, if we could just wrap up
this little ceremony--

I'd like to say a few words,
if you don't mind.

[quicksand burbling]

What was that?

Toads.

Uh, you were saying about a few words,
Your Majesty?

Yes. Right.

Uh... fellow Wonderlandians,
lend me your ears.

[all cheer]

I wasn't finished.

How can mere words
describe the beauty of your statues?

There's that sound again.

And another thing.

The statues look shorter
than I remembered.

Perhaps it's the tall grass.
It makes them seem shorter.

Yes. I suppose that's it.

Ah. And now I'd like
to walk among my statues.

No! You can't go in there!

-Excuse me?
-Because the ground is a little damp.

You might even say wet.

After all you've done for us,

we wouldn't want you
to ruin your good shoes.

[Red Queen] Oh, no.

The walk out here was hard enough on them.

Yes. So why don't we go back
to the palace,

and they'll all come by
and thank you for those amazing statues?

Okay. I knew everyone liked them,

but I had no idea
they were this enthusiastic.

-Whew.
-That was close.

-[Dee chuckles]
-Whoa.

We'd better put the sign back.

[Alice] Well...

nothing lasts forever.

Especially the queen's hobbies.

Thank goodness.

-I think they look good right now.
-Oh, yeah.

[mystical music playing]

[Alice] Dinah, I was thinking.

Yvette never actually said
she was good at all her hobbies.

I just assumed she was good
at all the things she likes to do.

And I assume
you want your dinner now, don't you?

-[meows]
-I thought so. Come on.

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme, and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪