[logo whooshing and sizzling]
♪ Here we go ♪
♪ T-T-T-Taking over, teenage rebellion ♪
♪ It's our time, it's our year ♪
♪ No more fantasizing about it ♪
♪ Everything's about to change ♪
♪ We're all gonna be okay ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, let's go ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, let's go ♪
- Hello, one and all!
Welcome back to another thrilling episode
of "Dimension 20: Fantasy
High Junior Year".
I'm your humble dungeon
master, Brennan Lee Mulligan.
With me, as always, are
our Intrepid Heroes.
Say hi, Intrepid Heroes.
- Hi, Intrepid Heroes.
- Last we left off, the Bad
Kids got back to Elmville
on the train, having seen
some horrifying unfoldings
in the aftermath of the
Last Standard Examination.
Buddy Dawn, brought back with
the power of a shatter star
by a giant figure, looming, cloaked,
with red light pouring forth.
We met Eugenia Shadow, the rogue teacher,
who talked all about how
Kipperlilly Copperkettle
got a backhoe to defile
her grave, and that's how
she found the rogue teacher
at the top of the year.
But those Rat Grinders
are nowhere to be found,
Kipperlilly's presidential campaign
for student body president almost defunct,
as Mazey, on a date with Fabian, how cute,
manages to share that, hey,
you wanna throw the rager of all ragers
at Seacaster Manor for your birthday,
you could probably set up a polling booth
and get the job done there.
- She's all business.
- Hey, maybe it's a polling booth,
or maybe it's a kissing booth.
[all cheering lasciviously]
- We made a clone of Kristen.
We had an ice cream party.
We filled out some teacher evaluations.
We found out that the Thistlespring
Tree is a Root Warden.
- [Siobhan] Yes.
- Oh!
- ♪ Root Warden ♪
- ♪ Root, Root Warden ♪
And Sandra Lynn told us about some trouble
in the Mountains of Chaos
where she works as a Solesian ranger.
We come back to Elmville, and right away,
we're gonna dive right back
into downtime to wrap this up
as you guys head towards
the end of your junior year.
So what I have so far for
the structure of downtime
as a bunch of stuff comes up,
a trip to the Mountains of Chaos,
Fabian, you said you were
looking for Ruben's house.
You were reaching out through
your popularity network
to look for Ruben's house.
Also, my god, at the end of last episode,
we saw Jace Stardiamond
with a shatter star scar
in his chest.
- Shatter shtar sh-car.
- We also saw a little geocache
location sent to Adaine
from Ayda Aguefort in the distant past.
So, downtime. Who's doing what?
Fabian did popularity, two relationships,
and then the Owlbears.
If you wanted to chase
down that Ruben thing,
you absolutely could,
but you're at a DC 25.
- Okay.
- You should maybe relax, also.
- Yeah, I'll just try to figure out-
- [Lou] You wanna try
and figure it out? Cool.
- Also, I think they're
all pretty clearly cursed,
and I don't think
anything's gonna turn them.
- All I have is disguise and deception.
Let me work my magic.
- [Brennan] So Fabian, you're
buttoned up for downtime.
- Yeah.
- Great.
Adaine, you had a mystery
about the Astral Realm,
learning about the weird
thing of where gods are borne,
maybe where they're carried or
something along those lines.
- And an academics check
to get some spells,
which I absolutely did not do.
- So you're at a DC 20.
- Yeah, but I'll...
This is wild.
Can I do a relaxation
check for my friends?
Basically, take some
stuff off their plates?
Like, hey, I'll go over to Kristen's room-
- I will let you do a relaxation-
- ...and reorganize her closet
so she doesn't have to worry about that.
- Aw.
- That's very sweet. I will
let you do a relaxation check.
But you also are doing your job
as the Elven Oracle, correct?
- Oh yes, so I have to do
that before relaxation.
- [Brennan] Before relaxation.
So go ahead and do your job.
- [Siobhan] 18.
- 18.
You don't do a very good job,
but you get paid either way.
- Great.
- Lovely.
People are unhappy with your prophecies.
- People live or die or whatever.
- Yeah, whatever. I got 15 gold pieces.
- Yeah, exactly.
Now you may go ahead
and roll for relaxation.
You've done a mystery,
relationship, academics, and job,
so this is now a DC 25
Wisdom saving throw.
- Okay, so I've got to
get an 18 or higher.
- [Brennan] 18 or higher.
- No.
- You give it your best,
and you don't burn any stress doing it.
Okay, you're tapped out for downtime.
Who else wants to jump in?
- I just have maybe a
few mystery things to do.
I guess first off, I'll
do extracurriculars.
With disadvantage, I still got 21.
- Incredible.
- Then I'll do, I guess, Owlbears.
- Let's see how the Owlbears
do this junior year.
- I'll give you a Bardic.
- Can we do Acrobatics?
- [Emily] I'll give you
a Bardic for Owlbears.
- Or only Athletics?
- I think for the joke of it,
it's only Athletics.
- Okay, I have disadvantage.
- I'm gonna give you a Bardic, though,
because I'm invested in making
sure Gorthalax is happy.
- I'm also giving a Bardic.
- d10.
- [Brennan] Okay, okay.
- So, I'll to roll two.
- Come on, The Ball.
- So this is with
disadvantage. That's one.
- What if, though?
- Four minus two is two.
- [Brennan] Okay, so you gotta roll eight.
- 10.
- 10!
- So now you gotta at
least get a six on the d8.
- [Murph] And then a d8.
- This is your Rudy moment.
- Two.
- How far away is that?
- No no no, the DC is only
- Oh, you got it.
- So you've done it.
You've done it. You did it.
- Great.
- He beat it by five.
- Owlbears once again beat the Hellions.
Riz, you and Fabian bring
it home. You bring it home.
- Yeah, Riz!
- I just hide with the ball behind Fabian,
let him take all the hits.
- Oi, Riz!
- No, come out here!
- Honestly, the most-
- I'm outside of, like,
a chain link fence.
- Just looking out there.
The most successful play is
just Riz holding onto the ball
and hoping the other team doesn't notice.
- Doesn't find me.
- So that if someone
passes into their end zone,
technically the ball is in possession
of one of the Owlbears' players,
and you win the game. Great.
- Super cheese way to
win. I get booed somehow.
- Bloke Mode Kristen is
sh*t-faced at your game.
- I know Sklonda's busy,
so I disguise myself as her
to cheer in the audience.
- It's Fig. It's Fig.
- What?
- It's Fig.
- My son! My son!
- [Ally] Don't tell her anything weird.
- I don't know, this sounds like my mom.
She always just yells, "My
son!" and waves her hands.
- There he goes!
- [Siobhan] Uncanny.
- She sounds so old.
- And then a few mysteries.
First things first, long shot,
but I wanna try to figure
out who this figure is,
specifically looking into it,
is this a corrupted
version of someone we know?
Whether it be Stardiamond or Kipperlilly
or one of the Rat Grinders.
Or, kind of looking into
the history of the giants
and these gods and stuff, is it possible
that there's essentially
an astral projection
or some kind of- somebody
that would be embodying
a weaker version of them
that could then wreak havoc
until they're able to ascend or whatever?
- Go ahead and give me, this is-
- Yeah, I guess I'm doing
my Detect Evil and Good
and comparing it to footage
we have, using the AV Club.
- Walking behind Jace like,
how does his foot roll when he-
- Yeah, just footage of people
that we have around school.
- Give me Investigation.
- Cool.
- This is DC 15, but beating
that by certain amounts
will help you out.
- 26.
- 26. DC is 15, you got a 26.
- Actually, I used two
Bardics on the last one,
but I only had to beat a 10.
- [Brennan] Yeah, you
wanna keep the other one?
- Can I use a Bardic?
- Yep, you can.
Let's see if you can get to 30.
- 26 right now, I just
need a four or higher.
And I do it. 32.
- Nice.
- [Lou] Yeehaw!
- [Brennan] 32. That's an
Investigation for mystery.
That's your DC 15.
- Yeah.
- We're gonna come back to that.
- Okay, cool.
- You are trying to
find, who is that figure?
- Right.
- And I think you don't
get it from the screen,
but you begin to think, is it corrupted?
Is it possible that there's
another incarnation?
And I think what you might wanna do is
go to your office.
- Okay.
- If you were to start thinking
about the events of this junior year-
like, the Rat Grinders were
caught by you red-handed,
and they've gone to ground.
They've scurried underground.
When Riz thinks back
about the case thus far,
the mystery thus far,
where do you see
open-ended clues, looking back?
- Hmm.
- I'll let you think
about that as we move on,
and someone else can start
their downtime track.
You have plenty more to go.
You're only at a DC 15 right now.
- Okay, yeah, I'll-
- You think about it.
Does anyone else, Kristen, Fig, Gorgug?
- I have a pretty straightforward one.
- Let's do it, Gorgug.
- I think now that we're freed
from the burden of our
school rolls, I'm gonna do,
and this is kind of a
mechanical thing as well,
but mostly a relationship
roll, I think, with my parents,
where I'm just gonna hang out with them
and kind of work on the van with them.
- Hell yeah.
- And just spend some time with the fam.
- [Brennan] Give me a
tinkerer's tool check.
- Tinkerer's tool, and to the end of,
I think what I'm doing with the van
is remembering that the Night Yorb
is sealed on the roof of it, and I'm like,
is there some way that
I used the Solar Lasso,
to catch him, to reverse
engineer a darkness?
Something that would be helpful
against these solar kind of entities?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Controlled Night Yorb.
- Yeah.
- [Siobhan] Nice.
- Give me a tinkerer's tool check.
You're just starting at a DC 5.
- That is a 21.
- Roll a d6 for me.
- I am.
Two.
- Two. Okay, great.
First, you see Wilma
and Digby are so happy.
You can tell that they've
really missed you this year.
Your dad's got a little sort
of sweaty A-frame undershirt,
working outside on a hot, late spring day.
Your mom comes out with
a bunch of iced tea,
puts a welding mask on, gets to work.
Yeah, taking little sips
with the welding mask up.
You're thinking about the Night Yorb.
- I suddenly text Fig,
in parentheses, or in quotes,
"'Harness the darkness?'
Is that anything?"
- Oh, that's good. I had
a different title, but...
How about that's my third track?
- Great, great.
- 'Cause I have another one.
I give you a Bardic Inspiration.
- [Ally] Yes!
- Because you've given me one.
- You get approached, as
well, for your evaluations,
which I already have.
But Porter and Henry approach
you, both of whom come up,
and Henry's just like,
"I gotta say, you know,
I ate a lot of humble pie.
You saw a path that nobody else saw,
and you really made it happen.
You have a lot to be proud of."
- Thank you, thank you. I
feel like, yeah, I don't know.
I feel like it was nice to just know
that somewhere in my
brain, that made sense,
and that that ended up making sense.
- You see Porter claps
you on the back and goes,
"You would be well within
your rights to think
that I was a bit of a jerk,
and I hope that you can see
that there was a reason I wanted you to...
To try.
And I know that I was difficult
at first, but I think-
in my own way, I hope it
pushed you to do something
that maybe you wouldn't
have been able to tap into,
wouldn't have been able to do."
- I do think you were kind of a jerk.
But it got me somewhere.
- Easy!
- I gave you fives across the board.
- I'm not supposed to know that!
- Oh, really? Then I gave you twos.
[Brennan roaring furiously]
[Zac roaring]
- [Brennan] He claps you on the back.
- Throw a flashbang in his face.
- Henry is, again, very happy
with everything and goes,
"You got any fun summer
projects you're working on?"
- Just doing some stuff with the van.
We sealed the Night Yorb
in the roof of the van.
- Yeah.
- We're trying to figure out
if there's a way to harness that
in any kinda meaningful way. I don't know.
- I'm sure. I mean, I'd just
be careful not to harness it
in a way that pops back
out again but, you know.
- I'll write that down.
- But absolutely, best of luck with that.
Are you trying to harness it
for a ray, a weapon, a protective aura?
- I don't know yet. Maybe
an aura, maybe a ray.
Just seeing if there's
any potential there.
But I don't really...
I'm just kind of exploring.
I've kind of let it lie for
most of the school year, so.
- Gotcha. Well, if you
ever want a helping hand.
I know you're done with class
for the rest of the year,
but feel free to holler.
- Okay.
- [Brennan] Let me
know. Take care, Gorgug.
- All right.
- And Henry takes off.
- I can't tell if I
think he's weird or not.
- I think he's trying to get
in on your plan, 'cause he's-
- My Insight rolls are with disadvantage.
- If he had rage, and that other person,
Stardiamond came to him with such rage,
I think he would've reacted
with equal rage, right?
- Yeah, I think so, too.
I think he was maybe just
looking out for his nephew.
- He could be good.
But you never know.
- I think that you work on the van.
Looking at the Night Yorb and all the work
you're doing here, I
think that you fix it up.
You can definitely help protect it.
I don't know if you would
make a weapon, that would be
capable of releasing it.
That might take more time.
But what I will say, too,
is I think that as you're working on it,
you come back to that broken
engine in Fabian's basement,
that Cloud Rider engine,
which is another thing
that you know the Rat Grinders did
or were involved in or did on purpose.
I think there's a part of
you that's sort of like,
have we ever seen that resolved?
Did we ever see why that happened?
- [Siobhan] No.
- That's your first roll. 21 on that.
What's your next downtime track?
- This is the thing that's
slightly out of character,
but also what I think
Gorgug could be thinking of
in terms of the overall mystery, is just
the idea of what the
congregation is lying about.
It feels like all of the Helio church
is lying about something to a god.
I'm trying to think of what that would be.
Can I make a check? A
History check or something?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I'm just curious.
Do we know if Cassandra
and Ankarna ever had a kid?
- I don't think you do.
I don't think you know if they did or not.
- Great question.
- You can roll a Religion
check, yeah. DC 10.
- Okay.
Yeah, I got a 15.
- So first of all, the name
Ankarna is not anywhere, right?
You guys had to work
really hard to find it
on a f*cking stone buried in
the ancient elven homeland.
There is nothing about
Cassandra having a child.
But you do know
that your resources are very limited.
The regions of these gods' appearance
would have more resources,
so if you wanted to
learn more about Ankarna,
the Mountains of Chaos would
probably have more opportunity.
You wanna learn more about Cassandra,
Sylvaire would probably have
more opportunities for that.
That's great, that's a 15.
That's your second downtime.
What else would you like to do?
- And then, I think I'm just gonna do
another mystery roll around
the cloud engine stuff.
Maybe I can go to Fabian's and look at it,
like we were talking about.
- Yeah, I think-
- Can I give him a Bardic to say,
I wanna know if it was
used to disperse something,
almost like farm equipment.
- Oh damn, yeah.
- Yeah, like a pesticide kind of thing?
- [Brennan] Yeah. Yeah,
yeah, yeah. Go for it.
Go ahead and give me a
tinkerer's tool check.
The DC is 15.
- I got a 19.
- [Brennan] You go over to
hang out at Fabian's place.
- Gorgug!
- Hey, dude.
- You want some fried rice.
- How old is it?
- I've got kind of a range.
Can go anywhere from 10 days to 3.
- I guess three.
- All right, all right!
- You go down, see the
engine, see where it's broken.
You see what you would have
to do to fix it or repair it.
Fundamentally, I think
you don't see anything
in it that appears to be
blasting or anything like that.
This doesn't appear to be
disseminating anything.
- Okay, maybe they're using it
to get to the elemental
mountains, the Mountains of Chaos.
- Is there anything I could ask
that Aviation Club kid about?
- Ooh, smart.
- [Brennan] Yeah, I think so.
Coming over, he says,
"Time for another lo-fi
study session, eh?"
- Yeah, yeah. I mean,
we're just kinda working on stuff here.
- Yeah, do you want any fried rice?
- Chill beats to study to. Fried rice?
I take my rice baked.
- I'll figure it out.
You two go ahead and have a conversation.
- I was just looking at this
cloud engine we got downstairs.
- Cloud Rider Engine!
- You know much about those?
- Ah, do I ever!
Well, there's a long and
proud tradition here in Spyre
of vessels such as these
that are nautical in nature
aspiring to take to the skies alongside
the great blimps and dirigibles
of my people, aviators!
And so certain arcano-tech
engines are constructed in order
that they might be able to
join us in a real man's ocean.
The sky!
- I wouldn't say that around Fabian.
- Well, say what you will.
He can say what he likes
about me, and if he says it,
I shall be at the zenith
of the atmosphere!
- I've got a three day fried rice,
and then I found some that
had been out in the sun.
I think that's a version of baked.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
[Brennan munching enthusiastically]
But yes, so that's all I know
about the old Cloud Rider Engine.
- Something this big, how big of a thing
do you think it could lift into the air,
or support on a cloud,
if that's how it works?
- The Cloud Rider Engine?
- Yeah.
- Oh, well, it depends
on what model you get.
He sort of looks over at the
one you have here and says,
"I'd say this one is, you
know, in all respect to
the previous Captain Seacaster,
probably got one
capable of taking the Hangman to the sky."
- Okay. It's not huge.
- [Brennan] I don't
imagine he would've gotten
one of lesser quality.
- No, the Hangman, the ship.
- Oh, the ship the Hangman. Wow.
- Yes, my "ship" is named after his ship.
- It's Hangman Junior.
- I wouldn't say junior.
- The Second?
- I wouldn't say the second.
It's just another Hangman.
- Esquire.
- 2.0.
- Like two people called John.
- Yeah.
- That's why I called it the Hangvan,
just a slightly different name.
- I guess I could've been
more creative at the time.
- The Hangm'n.
- Thank you for the fried rice.
- Of course, anytime. I
have rooms full of it.
- [Brennan] Any other downtime activities?
- I guess I'm gonna try a relaxation roll.
- That's right.
- Give me a relaxation roll.
- Give it a shot.
- DC 20 Wisdom saving throw.
- That's a four, becomes a five.
- Unfortunately, no.
- We live stressed!
- We live stressed.
- All of us but Adaine.
- All of us but Adaine,
who's out here trying to clean closets.
- I'm sorry, I put your
shoes in the wrong...
I just confused you more,
and I really did try.
- I can see the care here.
- We'll come back to Riz.
I know that you're
thinking about other stuff,
and you have some other rolls
to make, but Fig or Kristen.
- I'm gonna go down to
Hell and write a song
called "Righteous Rebel".
- Oof!
- Sort of like a mythological
Led Zeppelin-type song
about an avenging angel who
is loyal to her followers
to a fault, and lets her
compass become a weather vane.
[appreciative gasps]
- Okay, okay!
- Give me a Perform check.
- [Ally] Is it a compass
or a weather vane?
- That's a 37.
[Brennan laughs]
- That's right! That's right!
- Fig.
- [Siobhan] Album of the summer.
- In dreams, after writing this song,
you see a vision
of the Astral Realm,
and a giant, burning body of a woman
stretching from one horizon to the other
as fields and vast oceans
of skin and sinew
burn in red flame
beneath and endless astral indigo,
her hair flowing behind her.
But you see for a moment, in
your dream, her eyes open,
and her eyes are not red.
They are burning bright, like twin suns.
And you see her gasp,
"Cassandra!"
[pained roar]
- Can I touch her at all?
- Yeah.
- Okay, I know I'm just in a dream,
but I'm gonna cast the
paladin spell Ceremony
and do Atonement.
- You touch this paladin's-
- I led you back to yourself.
- You see that the face of
this giant looks at you.
Even as a hand instinctively
raises into a fist
to destroy you, as the energy
of that Atonement leaves,
you see she looks, tears of solar fire,
at a devoted paladin
who cannot burn, no
matter how hot the flame.
She goes,
"Why can you not burn?"
- Because my girlfriend is a phoenix,
and sexually, it would be a complication.
- I am, for the first time in ages,
thrown for a loop.
[players giggling]
- I lean in for a kiss.
[players cackling]
- She leans in and she
whispers in your ear with lips,
these enormous, you know,
like f*cking city blocks,
and she just goes, "You
have heard my voice before,"
and you hear that whisper of the voice
that slithered into your ears
when Yes! got pushed out into the world.
It was her voice then,
it is her voice now,
that said, "Here is a god
worthy of your worship."
She goes, "She left.
Cassandra remained alive.
No one understood.
No one understood!"
- You've lost your way,
and I lost my way too,
and in trying to find you,
I've been finding myself.
So we can do this. Just stay with me.
We're gonna get Cassandra back,
and the second you see her,
you're gonna feel like yourself again.
I get it.
- Figueroth.
- Your girlfriend's out of town.
- It's hard.
- It sucks.
- She looks at you and goes,
"My hero.
You have always known."
Fire and sunlight.
The trampling of proud horses.
The ringing of steel being
drawn to defend what is right.
And you awaken.
That is incredible.
You have now created two world-changing,
epic masterpieces of rock.
- Middle-aged men are
writing about your lyrics,
and being like, "I really
loved what she did with-"
- I definitely think Fig
does kinda write uncle rock.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- It's like metal,
but maybe also- it's very Foo Fighters.
- I will say, you let me
know whenever your record...
Your independent studio
record label is ready to go,
if you wanna release these songs
or you're still sitting on
them, waiting for the album.
- You know what, Fig personally
loves a high concept album,
but that's not the way
the world works anymore.
I'll release them both as singles.
- Nice.
- You release them both as
singles, and I'm going to roll
a saving throw in front of the board.
[die rolling]
- For the world?
- For the world.
I rolled a saving throw for the world.
- The world adds two?
- The world adds two.
The songs take off. They
begin climbing the charts.
You get an email from Lola Embers.
- I f*cking block her.
I say, I've actually got
my own record label now,
but feel free to send
artists you like my way.
[Brennan whooping]
- That's your first downtime check.
Go ahead and let me know
what your next one is.
- So I think for my second
one, since I'm in Hell,
and also, I'm kinda doing music again,
I think I want to actually
do a relaxation track,
because I feel like we have
some nice sulfurous saunas.
- Yeah. Know that the
rule for relaxation tracks
is that they have to be the last track.
- [Emily] Oh, they have to be the last.
Okay.
- Yeah.
- So then I'm not gonna do that.
Okay, I think I'm just
gonna- this is for mystery,
but I'm gonna go into a dream of Ruben's.
- Okay, Fabian, I believe,
already rolled for
something that helps this.
You may do this with advantage.
- Okay, and since this
is social engineering,
can it be Persuasion?
- [Brennan] It can
absolutely be Persuasion.
- Okay, and obviously I'm
going as Wanda Childa.
- [Brennan] Hell yeah.
- You should release a
second album as Wanda Childa
at the same time.
- [Ally] Oh my god!
- Just a bunch of shitty
garage band tracks.
- Yes.
- That is a-
- [Lou] Acoustic guitar loops.
- ...27.
- Hell yes.
What are you trying to social engineer?
What are you trying to hunt down?
- I know Riz is thinking
that it's a dead end,
but I wanna see if there's a way
that we could get
between him and his crew.
So I think in the dream,
I want it to be dreamlike
and kind of hard to see me,
so I think I stage us at an emo show
so there's people walking in
between us the whole time,
and I think Wanda's just
gonna keep being like,
I wanna be with you, but this
will always keep us apart.
It will always come between us.
And she points to the sigil on his chest.
And I wanna see how he reacts to that.
- Oh, so here's an interesting thing.
You go to find Ruben,
but there is some abjuration
that protects him, but not his dreams.
So you can't speak to him,
but you see this gestalt, empty space.
Rather than being able to persuade Ruben,
I will let you ask three
questions about his dream world.
- Okay.
Where is he in the dream?
- You don't see the Mountains of Chaos.
You see Elmville.
- Okay.
- And additionally, I will say,
on that incredibly high roll,
you see Ruben's house.
- Okay.
- Which is incredibly high up.
It's in the foothills up near
the Durinson Mithral Factory.
But you also see that it is able to look
out of this massive mansion-style balcony
down at Shimmerstone Lake.
- Okay.
- Oh!
- The second thing I wanna ask
are, what are his emotions?
If any of the other,
specifically if Kipperlilly,
or if any of the other Rat
Grinders are in the dreamscape,
do I get a sense of his
emotions towards them?
- He is-
- Is there any tension?
- Incredible tension.
His dreams are violent and rage-filled,
but he is also scared.
You can ask whatever question
you want for your third one,
but you also see
a glade in the Far Haven Woods
and a very frightened Ruben
with a puka shell necklace and
sandals and a little ukulele
walking towards a clearing in the woods.
- That's where they did it.
I think they all did it together.
- Somewhere in there, maybe
the old Ruben is trapped.
- Oh, interesting. The
old Ruben is trapped.
Okay, I think I'm gonna use this
to act on what I wanted to do.
- Cool, go for it.
- Forgive me.
I need an accomplice, though,
to sh**t me with a crossbow.
- Yeah, I can-
- British Kristen will do it.
[overwhelmingly English music]
- Do you wanna borrow my hand crossbow?
- You can show me how.
- Mate, you need to understand.
- Mate?
- I did not
program that into her.
- Mate!
- That was not me.
- You're so strong.
- So you guys are gonna come with me?
- I don't know where this
came from. It's not me.
- Yeah, Kristen Two and myself are gonna-
- Put your hands on me.
- So I think that I wanna go-
I disguise myself as Wanda Childa.
- Are they already f*cking?
- No!
- You two stay in the shadows, right?
I need you guys to stay offscreen.
I wanna go throw rocks at his window.
- We're done with the
dream, this is real life?
- This is real life.
- Okay, so you wanna go to Ruben's place.
To Ruben's house. Cool.
- And then you guys know that
the trigger is, "Kipperlilly?"
- Okay.
- Okay, okay.
- [Brennan] You're disguised
as Wanda. Throw rocks.
- I act really cold.
- She's so small.
- Very small.
- [bad English accent]
She's small as f*ck, mate.
- Clone Kristen is so strange.
Rock after rock after rock.
- I Create Water over her so it's raining.
- [Brennan] It's raining. Incredible.
- I have so much eyeliner.
- [Brennan] Incredible.
You Create Water over her,
and as she begins to-
- Oh my god, amazing.
- [mostly English accent]
It's coming down, ain't it?
- Cats and dogs, mate.
- I'm gonna roll a Luck
check in front of the board
just to see if Ruben is here or not.
I will not lie, it is very unlikely,
even if he were here,
there's a lot going on
right now behind the screen.
So, you need a 17, 18, 19, or 20.
[die rolling]
That is a nine.
- [Emily] Can I use a Luck point on this?
- Yes, you can. You can use a Luck check.
[die rolling]
[players cheering]
- I can feel it. Hold.
- The window opens, but
you don't see anybody.
- Ruben, if you're in there, I just...
I'm sick of lying to myself. I really...
Kipperlilly?
- Okay, sh**t.
I'm gonna give you the Help action.
- Okay, great.
- Are you proficient with crossbow?
- No. Well, maybe.
- Are we gonna do all this,
and then you're gonna miss?
- Well, can't you?
- Oh, oh!
- I am gonna need Clone Kristen
to roll with disadvantage.
- You have a Bardic.
- It would be flat, 'cause you did-
- Okay.
- So it's flat.
- And you have a Bardic.
- You have a Bardic.
- I'm hiding there too.
- All right, you add a plus two.
Fig's armor class is 19.
- Okay.
[die rolling]
- Okay.
- 12.
- I gave you a Bardic.
- Bardic.
- Flash of Genius.
- Becomes 15.
- [Brennan] Here we go.
- One.
- One.
- 16!
- You need to roll a three.
This is your last chance.
- All right.
- Four!
- Okay, so as I get hit by it,
I cast Feign Death on myself
and then fall backwards
with my thumb hoodie
opening to reveal one of
those death sigils on myself.
And I'm dead.
- And you're dead.
- My last words were, Kipperlilly.
- Give me Deception, just to
sell the emotion of the moment.
- Oh, okay. So, I'm an Actor.
- You are an Actor.
- Nat one and a 19.
- That's right!
- So it becomes 34.
[Emily whimpers tinily]
- I'm crying, watching this
happen. It's so beautiful.
- Jesus Christ. What did you do, Kristen?
♪ Mm, whatcha say ♪
- [Emily] Kipperlilly, why?
Kipperlilly, why would you do this to me?
Is it 'cause you were jealous?
- And you die, and-
- We run.
- Did we f*ck up? We f*cked up.
We have to go! We have to go!
- You guys know the plan.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Incredible. You die.
Now, here's the real question.
You know that you've given
the performance of a lifetime.
You know that someone in
the window, gotta be Ruben,
someone in the window saw.
How long does Fig lie on the lawn?
- I trust my friends to
take care of it from now on,
because I think Feign Death,
I'm just basically dead right now.
- Okay, I think we maybe
brought a cloak or something,
and then one of us can
run and grab the body.
- Can I cast Enlarge/Reduce on Gorgug
to make him look 14 feet tall?
- And put a giant cloak on him? Oh my god.
- Stunning.
- Okay.
- [exaggerated accent] Bloody gorgeous.
- I guess I'll run up
and go... [grumbling]
- You grab dead Wanda Childa and run away.
- It's all coming to plan.
- Unbelievable. Truly unbelievable. Okay.
- This what we made you leave for.
- This is why we made you leave.
- This is what we made you leave for.
- The Wanda Childa fake assassination.
- Literally a perfect "Mm,
whatcha say," and you guys leave.
You know you gave the
performance of a lifetime,
but you know that you will not have
a bird's eye view of what
the results of that are.
- I'm not asking for it.
- Cool, great.
- All I'm asking for,
all I was asking for, Ruben, was a shot,
and maybe your hoodie that I
could wear through the fall.
- [Brennan] Just incredible.
So, so, so incredible.
- And then the last two
things I wanna do is,
I wanna try to work with a tattoo artist
to make a tattoo for
Fabian for his birthday.
- Cool, give me a Performance check.
DC is 15, but you've got to beat-
- 32.
- Either of the tattoos you
like, you may give to Fabian.
- Okay.
- Looking forward to it.
- [Emily] And now, am I
allowed to try to do a-
- You roll a- do relaxation.
This will be a DC...
It's 5, 10, 15, 20. This is
a DC 25 Wisdom saving throw.
- I can't do it unless I crit.
Okay.
- So Fig, you get this tattoo designed.
Who do you reach out to to design it?
- I'm gonna text the rogue teacher.
- Great.
- Eugenia.
- [Brennan] Eugenia Shadow has
given you her phone number.
- I'm gonna tell her, I've had some ideas.
I'm wondering if you would come do
some stick and pokes at Fabian's birthday.
Tattoo birthdays are really in right now,
and I have a specific tattoo
that I think would be really-
- Splendid, I'll find a time
when nobody will be able
to see him, and I'll knock
him out and tattoo him.
- [Emily] Actually, I do
think he would like that.
- [Brennan] Where does he want it?
- Let me text him. Hey, Fabian?
- Hey, what's going on, Fig?
- So, I was wondering
where you were thinking of
getting your next tattoo,
'cause I'm thinking of getting a tattoo,
so I'm curious what part of your body
you've been thinking of tattooing next.
- I've got a bunch of ideas.
I think there's some forearm stuff.
You know, maybe an arrow, or maybe a clock
to remind me that, you know-
[Zac cracks up]
- To remind you of what? What time it is?
'Cause it won't change.
- Yeah, I know that.
No, it's more like, you know,
kinda like time, we don't have a lot.
We only have so much of it, you know.
- Okay, that's actually awesome.
- Those are kinda the big things.
Maybe some wildflowers, I don't know.
- Okay, I text back Eugenia and I'm like,
I want a clock surrounded by wildflowers.
- Clock surrounded by
wildflowers on the forearm.
She says, "And this is a
Ghost Step Tattoo, right?"
- Yeah, yeah.
- I wanna submit one design
that I think fits Ghost Step as a concept.
- Okay.
- I will be happy to do
the wildflower clock,
but think about this for Ghost Step.
And it's a drawing of a Pac-Man ghost
with big hairy human feet under it.
- I send it to Fabian, being like,
what would you think if I got this?
Would you think it was cool?
Would you ever get a tattoo like this?
- I'm gonna heart it.
- Dot dot dot.
- Wild!
- Does that mean you would get it?
- If, like, four other
people were getting it,
and it was kinda like our thing, maybe.
I don't know. I mean, I guess...
Is it significant to you in some way?
Is ghost feet kind of a thing?
- Yeah, it's like an inside
joke with us, the Bad Kids.
- Really? Remind me. I
think I forgot this one.
We have so many.
- I heart it.
And then say no,
we're going with the
clock with wildflowers.
- She says, "All right,
to each their own."
A beautiful, elaborate grandfather clock
surrounded by a bed of
wildflowers growing up around it.
She send it and says, "I
will make sure to tattoo it
on his forearm when he least expects it."
- Great. Great.
- [Brennan] Incredible. Kristen?
- I have a little bit of, like,
almost a scene out of a movie,
and I'm wondering if you'll let me do it.
- Yeah, let's do it.
- So Kristen comes out of
finishing lunch in the cafeteria
and she throws her crisps,
the bag of them, in the bin,
and she turns the corner.
- Okay, so we know which Kristen.
- And at the end of the hall,
Kristen, normal Kristen,
walks into Jawbone's office.
- Cool.
- [Ally] So this is the
first thing I wanna do.
It's a relationship roll with Jawbone.
- [Brennan] Cool.
- And I wanna talk to him
about how a lot of people have been
seeming really angry
lately, and I wanna hang up
a bunch of posters around
the school that says,
"Angry lately? We can help,"
with a phone number on it,
and if he could tell me about-
- Resources for-
- Resources, or if he's noticed it too,
and which students in particular
have stood out to him.
- Give me an Insight
check, difficulty five.
- 29.
- 29, incredible.
- I'd love to walk and talk with him.
- Can you also give me a d6 roll?
- Oh yeah, yeah.
- I'm wondering-
- Two.
- Two, great. What's that?
- Would my present for
Fabian count as relationship?
- I think it would.
- Ooh.
- Ah!
- Six! Two gone!
- You lose two stress tokens.
- Woo! I'm back to good.
- [Brennan] Fig is completely unstressed.
- Wow.
- Wow.
- [Ally] So sick.
- Amazing.
- You've just got to invest
in your community, guys.
- The two people who had
the least amount of
stress tokens are fine.
- Yeah, just getting rid of them.
That makes the most sense, honestly.
- Past a certain point, it's
hard to get back, right?
So Kristen, you go talk to Jawbone.
Jawbone's like, "That is
so thoughtful and kind.
To be honest with you,
yeah, it's been really...
It's been really hard recently."
You notice, by the way,
that Jawbone's office
is filled with old teacups.
- Oh, whoa.
- He's like, "Yeah, it's been tough,
just taking a lot on, a lot of stress.
A lot of kids need help, yeah."
- Yeah, I think I would love
to walk and talk with him
and actually fill him in on
everything that we've found
so that he knows that there
might be some sort of contagion
or body-taking-over that's going on.
- How do you actually
explain it to Jawbone?
- I say, okay, so,
well, you know we passed
the Last Standard.
And then I tell him about
how Buddy got his throat cut.
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- And we also think that the Rat Grinders
are involved in some way,
and we've kinda traced it
back to this trip that
they took with Stardiamond
to the Mountains of Chaos, and we think-
we have a video now of Buddy getting a gem
thrust into his chest,
and he comes up and says,
"I have a new nameless god,"
and he looks angry as I've ever seen him.
- [sighs] Ay, caramba.
- [Ally] Yeah.
- Well...
That's bad.
- Yeah.
- That's really bad.
- So I think that they're trying
to do something in Elmville,
and I'm trying to get the names
of as many people as
possible, so that I can...
Honestly, I'm kind of
picturing a 24-point star
is what they're really obsessed with,
and I'm wondering if there
are 24 homes or locations
that they're doing something at,
and it will come into a center.
So would you mind giving me...
Or, you know, you don't
have to say anything
if you just want me to...
I don't know, I just need
addresses of the people
that I know for sure
already are taken over.
And I tell him all the Rat
Grinders, plus Jace and Molman.
- He says, "Jace?"
- We're positive.
Jawbone?
Will you show me your chest?
You're looking toned as f*ck, dude.
- There's a lot of fur
there, but I appreciate that.
- Okay, good. Okay.
- You see he says, "Okay.
Did Yolanda know about any of this stuff?"
- I tell him everything about Yolanda,
and then I tell him that it's because
she stood up for herself and
refused to get corrupted,
and that I wanna try to bring her back,
but we're running out of time.
- Okay, we gotta...
I'm trying to think what
the smart way is to do this.
'Cause Jace is here,
working at the school.
- Yeah, I know.
- You have video evidence of him-
- We just Scryed. I don't think
we were able to record it.
- But Buddy, you do.
- He's wearing a scarf, right? Jace?
Why is Jace wearing a
scarf? It's so f*cking hot.
- Okay, I'll try to see if
I can organically engineer,
maybe invite him to dance.
How do I get that scarf off him?
- Wait, why?
He's gonna k*ll you if he
sees you looking for it.
- Okay, good point.
Good point, good point.
- Jawbone, I'm worried about you!
Can we go clean up the tea?
- Been drinking a lot of tea.
I've been kinda plowing through tea.
- I'll be 100% honest with you.
My first plan was, me and
you are walking and talking,
and British Kristen goes into your office
and steals all the addresses.
- Who's British-
- Turn around.
- [Brennan] Oh, I remember
British Kristen. Yeah.
- And then British Kristen's
at the end of the hall. Now?
So the three of us, I think,
can we go and deep clean
Jawbone's office for him?
- Look, I can't give you
kids' personal files.
But what I can do is try
to see if there's anyone
that I think is more
corrupted or not, but-
- We just need addresses.
I'm trying to mark it on
a map with some pushpins.
- Okay, can you just give me a map,
and we'll see if it spells something out?
- Okay, if you can do that
work, that would be awesome.
- Also give him Loam Farm.
- Yeah, Loam Farm could
be one of the points.
I'm trying to see if
we're getting up to 24.
Right now I only have nine.
- Yeah.
- But that's just of who we know.
- When you point out that
Lydia Barkrock's place
was also one of the places,
he sort of looks at that and
is like, "Man, that's odd."
- Why?
- I don't know.
Did y'all ever find out who it
was that tried to k*ll Lydia?
- We think that it was Kalina.
When she was corrupted for
the Nightmare King, right?
- We also don't know know. We just-
- He looks at you and
says, "But it had to be...
There's a reason that Kalina
had all those Vrock demons
when y'all fought at the Hotel Cavalier.
Kalina wasn't physical enough
to actually hurt anybody
outside of the Nightmare King forest.
Lydia's house got destroyed,
so there were some demons,
or maybe it was Vrocks,
or maybe it was whatever
else Kalina was working with,
but something physically
destroyed her house.
That couldn't have been Kalina.
Kalina might have been able
to k*ll her in her mind-"
- Did it look like a giant
stepped down on it? 'Cause-
- [Brennan] Yeah, it looked like a giant.
- ...we've had a lot of
people getting smashed.
- Okay, I'm gonna work on this map.
- I know I'm kinda pushing it,
but could you just give me five addresses?
Just the Rat Grinders, so that
I can go by their house and-
- I can't give you a kid's
address, kiddo. I'm sorry.
- All right.
- But I'll work on this map,
and if it turns into a 24-point
star or something like that,
I'll let you know, okay?
That's your relationship
roll with Jawbone.
You see Jawbone looks at you and says,
"You gave your teacher
evaluation for Bobby, right?"
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- I lit that b*tch up.
- You might have another
chance to light him up again.
Knowing that Buddy is missing,
his behavior makes a
little bit more sense.
- What do you mean?
- He's losing it.
- He probably has a gem.
Losing it like sad, or losing it like mad?
- Losing it like sad.
You can go talk to him.
He's got his office hours.
You're a cleric student.
- Okay.
- You walk into the cleric office,
and you see that, first of all,
there's a bunch of just staff
of the Church of Sol in here,
which is a complete break
with rules and protocols.
But you see there is an older woman
with incredibly wildly overdone makeup,
huge blonde beehive hair, who's
got a greatsword on her back
and a white pencil skirt and white blazer.
Bobby looks sleepless and he's like,
"Now, I don't care how
long we have to look,
we're gonna find this boy,
and I need everyone here
working double overtime until we do!
Hello, Ms. Applebees."
- [sighs] You can't find him?
- We know that he died.
But now we can't locate his
soul in the blessed afterlife.
- That's because he chose a new deity.
- The room goes silent.
- I think someone offered
him a chance to keep living,
and he would've had the, I don't know,
make a harder choice, so...
[sighs]
I think it's too sad
for me to not tell him,
so I tell him a version of it.
- When you say that, Bobby looks
and says, "Ms. Applebees...
Everyone keep looking.
Keep on those phones.
We got a whole bunch of believers
in a whole bunch of countries,
we're gonna find this boy!"
And you see that he says,
"Ms. Applebees, you step into my office."
- What is he wearing around his neck?
- He's got a white seersucker suit.
He's got the, you know, button-up shirt.
You can't see his chest.
- This is gonna sound weird, Bobby,
but if you want my help,
you're gonna have to show me
about halfway down your chest,
as if you were wearing a deep V-neck.
And you have five seconds to
make that choice. Five, four-
- He takes it and shows
you a incredibly hirsute,
platinum white hairy chest.
- Honestly, really deeply impressive,
and thank you for going with me.
All right, I go into his office with him.
- He goes, buttons up, and says,
"I don't understand the request,
but I'm not interested."
- What? God!
- No, I mean,
I'm not interested in what
the request was about.
- Oh, okay, great, great. Yeah, yeah.
- All right, Buddy was a
devout priest of Helio.
There is no way on this earth
that he would've chosen a new deity.
- I know two people who
were somehow able to not,
and maybe it was because
they were powerful clerics,
so maybe he was just
too young of a cleric.
Maybe I wouldn't be able
to do it. But I tell him...
I don't tell him that we recorded it
or that we're so onto them,
but I just point out to him
that the entire party is not here.
- Do you know what afterlife
Buddy would've gone to if he's dead?
We can't find him. We don't
even know if he's alive or dead.
- I think it's the Astral Plane.
- Do you know anything at all
about if he's been corrupted?
There is some deity that
has taken over his mind.
Do you know anything about them?
Anything that they are vulnerable to?
Where their church might be located?
How we might be able to find them?
Where their followers are?
Do they have a church here in Elmville?
- I don't, I really don't.
I really just know it might be...
It's definitely a god that's
been dead for a long time
that only recently just came back.
- How did a god...
You mean Cassandra? Your deity?
- It's her ex-wife, actually.
And I savor all four
letters of the word wife.
- Ms. Applebees, I see now that I have,
in fact, been punked.
- No, no, no, it's not. She-
- You've come in here with
some sort of sacrilege.
You are telling me that the god
that has corrupted my grandson
is the dead wife
of your goddess.
- Mm-hmm.
- Is this some sort of practical joke?
You're taking advantage of a
man in the depths of grief?
- I think that this is
a moment for Kristen,
especially with all of
her baggage with Sol,
that she is earnestly
bridge-building and trying to work,
so I would love to try to do
a Divine Intervention roll.
- [Brennan] Give me the roll.
- [Ally] To give us some sort of sign,
for Cassandra to help both of us.
- [Brennan] Okay.
[die rolling]
- Damn, eight.
- Eight, okay.
The Divine Intervention does
not come in this moment.
You see he looks and says,
"I would love to be certain
that you're telling the truth,
and look, I know that
you bear me no fondness."
- I am trying to help you.
- I'm trying to help my
grandson, and furthermore,
if this divinity poses a threat
to Spyre and the world,
regardless of our political differences,
I assure you that I have a
vested interest in the world
remaining by and large the
same as it is right now.
- Yeah, but I think
you're missing the point
that this is the corrupted,
unhealed version of this god.
This isn't the actual god.
- Who's the actual god?
- I don't know.
That's what we're trying to figure out.
- [laughs] I'm just looking at Murph.
Murph is f*cking going through it.
- What? What am I missing?
Message me! Message British Kristen!
- It's all good. He says, "All right.
Is there any resource that
we can provide to you?
Anything that you or
your friends might need
to make it more likely that
we are gonna recover Buddy?"
- Can I get back to you?
Can I email you at your teacher email?
- Absolutely. You have
my faculty email address.
- When's the last time
you heard from Buddy?
What have you heard about him?
- Frankly, Ms. Applebees,
the last I heard was,
he was going to look at your
Last Stand exam, where he died.
- Yes. When he died, I
would have brought him back.
But I had been pickpocketed.
All of my diamonds were gone.
And I checked his pockets,
and his were, too.
So this was a calculated effort.
- I cannot help but shake the feeling that
you are not being forthcoming.
- That's because you're paranoid,
and your religion really
backs that up for you.
- [sighs] If there is any information
you can give me
about the god that has
corrupted my grandson,
I am a very prodigious
cleric and I assure you
I would be able to make use of it.
- Oh, yeah. Totally. I'm sure.
I'm getting a phone call.
- That's all, Ms. Applebees?
- Yeah, 'cause I gotta go
talk to my friend Murph.
- You head out from there,
and you see immediately,
as you head out, Bobby goes right over
and has a short, whispered
conversation with Pamela
as you walk out the door.
I think you can regroup with
your friends after that.
- Okay, what's going on?
- Was he trying to get
you to say the god's name?
- I think so, I think so, yeah.
- Yeah, I was scared, in theory.
- I think he's maybe putting on a show
about, where's my grandson?
- Yes, yes, yes.
- Oh, you think so?
- Let's also not say the name at all.
Let's not say the name, even when we're
talking about it when we're-
- Oh, wait! I thought he-
- 'Cause his last name is Dawn,
and I think they're trying to use-
they're trying to steal that power
and funnel it into Helio and Sol.
- Here's my question.
I have a couple suspects
of who the giant might be,
and one of them is somebody
that can cast Revivify or Raise Dead,
and that would be Bobby Dawn.
- Yeah.
- I'm wondering if Bobby
Dawn was the person we saw.
- Or Pamela Dawn, 'cause
she's also a paladin, right?
- She's a paladin.
- Oh yeah.
- I will say that your theory,
you cannot rule out your
theory based on previous rolls.
- Okay, other-
- I do think he did seem earnestly scared.
The only reason I didn't say the name
is because he is so
strong and he might try
to actually just straight-up
k*ll her and end her as a god.
- I think, yeah-
- Whether or not he's-
- I think that this rage, Sol,
I just feel like there's
some connection there.
- I tried to pepper in a couple things
that would make him really mad,
just to see if he's had some other version
of the rage crystal in
him, and I think he's-
- He might not need to be crystalled
to be worshiping this god.
- I think he's a bad guy,
but maybe not that kind of bad guy.
But I'm also open to it.
- They also might just be
the first to flip when
this god gets summoned.
Here's the other question.
- And if the Church of Helio
has been losing followers,
maybe it's because him and
her being televangelists
are [clicks tongue] picking
off people towards this new god
that they think is gonna have more power.
- Totally.
- So either Bobby Dawn is in on this,
or Bobby Dawn is just a stooge
that could make things worse.
Another thing is,
we haven't really considered
Lydia's dead allies.
What if they were given an offer
when they died at Bakur's hand?
- Kristen, can you get a
pamphlet of a church service
from your family?
- Yeah.
- And see what they're praying about,
and ask them what they are
actually taking communion with?
- Oh, that's great.
That's a great question.
Like mead wine? Honey wine
or something like that?
- Yeah, and what are they
being asked to pray about?
- Yeah, great question.
- And the other thing,
I feel like because we know stuff happened
in the Mountains of Chaos or
that they went on a trip there,
we've maybe overlooked some of the stuff
with Lake Shimmerstone, which is that-
- Yeah, I also point out
that glade that I saw
in Ruben's dream and say we
should probably go there.
- At first, I think when we realized
that they must have made
some deal to come back,
we assumed that maybe something happened
in the Mountains of Chaos.
But we know that Lucy-
- I think it happened here.
- ...had multiple attackers,
so it happened here,
and I think it happened...
I think she could've made the deal after.
Or someone put in a
request to change her god,
so she could've been thinking
about going along with them,
and then didn't, and that's
when they betrayed her.
- I wonder if in this glade,
they had some sort of ritual.
- Yeah, with my Investigation
check, Lake Shimmerstone,
is it called Shimmerstone 'cause
it literally reflects the Chaos Mountains?
Does it have water from it?
- I will say on that, no roll necessary.
Lake Shimmerstone gets its name
because of the gem
filaments that flow down
from the Mountains of Chaos.
- Yeah.
- Cool, we don't even need to go to the-
- You guys are rapidly closing in.
You can smell it right ahead of you.
Let's close up this downtime
track real quick right here.
Anything else from Kristen?
- Two more things.
One, I would like to pull up the PDF
and find what the changes
in the bylaws were.
- Cool, no roll necessary.
When Mazey became president,
there was a request during
the Night Yorb thing
for a change that basically
happened to the bylaws,
which was that there
is no inaugural period.
So once the results of
the election are counted,
whoever wins is president.
So the new president
wins on election night.
- Mazey did that?
- Yes, and it looks like,
looking at the changes that were put in,
that was based on a faculty request.
- Oh.
- [Ally] By?
By Jace?
- Jace requested it, probably?
- Not listed, and in fact,
you think that's why
someone went through Mazey.
Someone's hand is disguised by
Mazey having made the change,
but it's noted as a faculty request.
- We were wondering if what's-his-face,
the principal that was a robot-
- Grix.
- Grix.
- Grix, if he was affected
by changes in bylaws.
- [gasps] They're gonna...
Oh, if my thing is correct
and there's 24 points around
and a center place, whoever
becomes president now
is the principal, they can use Aguefort,
with all of us having to attend
graduation, and do something
that charges the place
and f*cking, I don't know-
- Is Aguefort in the middle of town?
- Just about, just
about. It's pretty close.
- Okay, okay. Okay, that's that.
I think I'm going to...
If I can catch Bucky in the
halls, I'm gonna peer around.
- Is this a relationship roll or is this-
- [Ally] Yeah.
- Go ahead and give me an Insight.
- That's a 26.
- Incredible!
You see Bucky hanging out
on the steps of the school,
looking really bummed.
- Aw. Hey, hey.
- Hey, Kristen.
- How's it going? You look sad.
- [sighs] I got really mad,
yelled at all of my friends.
My adventuring party.
- Why?
- I just kept being like, I'm here,
I healed people and I protected them,
and they didn't change
their religion right away.
- Yeah.
You know, Bucky, I...
You're in an interesting
situation, and I was in it also,
so if it ever feels hard for you,
or like two things are kinda conflicting,
you always have me to talk to,
'cause I went through it too.
It seems like you kinda
have a one track mind
about Helio and Sol, but at the same time,
you know, people are kinda...
Does it seem like Mom and Dad
are still really worried
about you and can't trust
that you'll be able to
take care of yourself?
- Yeah. Yeah, I think Mom and Dad...
'Cause, like,
there are parts of this school
that I'm really excited about.
You know, you find new people,
and they have all this different stuff,
and you look at them and you're like, wow,
they're just like that, and it's so weird.
But they're, like, fine.
And they're, like, friendly.
- Yeah.
- And it's like, that's so...
You know, they're so different,
and that is how...
- Bucky, I can only speak for myself here,
but I really felt like I was kind of given
a faulty alarm system
by our upbringing, and so something-
meeting new people,
some of it felt so fun,
but then I had something
that was put in there
that was installed against my will
that was like, "This is bad!
You have to run! Danger, emergency!"
And it's not that complicated.
If you meet people and it feels
warm and it feels inviting
and you're just interested,
I think you gotta listen to that.
You have a lot of wisdom in there.
Right in there! And I'm
kind of feeling around.
- You don't feel anything on his chest.
- Okay, good.
- He feels you touching him.
- Right in there.
- He goes, "That's really
nice, Kristen. It feels...
I don't want it to be complicated,
but it feels complicated,
because it's like, I don't want to...
I don't think any of my friends are bad,
but there's a lot of things
that Mom and Dad have said are bad.
So here, it's everything
you're warned about, right?
It's like, hey, you're gonna meet people,
and if they're different in this way,
that they don't believe in Helio,
they don't, you know, do this stuff,
then it's like, I don't...
Won't temptation feel exciting?
Won't temptation to do bad
stuff feel really good?
So I'm walking around imagining
being like my friends,
feeling really good, and then it's like,
well, that's literally
what I was warned about."
- Yeah, that's that alarm
system that might...
That might be wrong.
I think you have a very
courageous choice to make,
and it's to decide if Mom and Dad
know your life better than you do.
- You feel the shards of
twilight glowing in your pocket.
I don't even know what
my life could look like,
other than what Mom and Dad
said it could look like.
- Yeah.
If you ever wanna talk, my
god is literally about...
about free fall, about doubt,
about being honest about
not having all the answers.
So if you feel kinda like you wanna try on
that sticky situation in between,
that's where I'm living.
- Give me an Insight check.
[die rolling]
- Okay, that's a 16.
- Bucky can't bring himself to ask for it,
but you see that he wants
to talk with you about it.
He just goes, "Thanks for
talking to me, Kristen.
I miss you." He gives you a big hug.
- Really big hug.
- Really, really big hug.
He walks away, and I think that
the light from the shards
dances out in front of you and shows you
all the many versions of
Bucky's life that he can't see.
- Sweet boy.
- That's really beautiful.
- Anything else after
that relationship track?
- I was gonna try a real quick relaxation.
- Go for it.
- You got 'em.
- I didn't get it.
- What'd you roll?
- Seven.
- [Brennan] Plus your Wisdom saving throw.
- So that's a five, right?
- Yeah, 12.
- Yeah, okay, 12.
- No, I think you're proficient
in Wisdom saving throws.
- [Siobhan] Wis save, not-
- [Brennan] It's the save,
not just the modifier.
- Not the modifier.
- 10.
- Oh, 10? Okay, 17.
- 17, DC was 15. You can
remove a stress token.
- Oh yeah, oh yeah, 'cause I didn't do
all that bullshit with Bloke Mode Kristen.
- Do you want a Bardic so you can see
if you could remove two?
- Go big.
- You could go big.
You got 17. You could
maybe move some more.
- It's a d10.
- d10. Let's see what you get.
[die rolling]
- Seven! 24!
- Seven, 17, 24.
DC is 15, that's nine. You
lose three stress tokens.
- Hey!
- Woo!
- I think with three stress tokens...
And also, wait, that was a
relationship chat with Bucky.
- Oh yeah.
- Roll a d6.
[die rolling]
- Six!
- [Brennan] You lose
all your stress tokens.
Describe for me-
- So sick!
- What are some of the
different versions of Bucky
you see as all of the stress melts away?
- I think I just see a really
happy Bucky with friends
that are not necessarily Helio.
Or maybe some of them are,
but just a little bit less
paranoia of black and white thinking,
of good and evil, and there's
this spiritual warfare,
and you have to be on guard
or something like that.
It's just really, really relaxed.
- Hell yeah. I love that.
All of your stress melts away,
and you hear Cassandra's voice
speaking to you and saying,
"So many untread roads,
and all so beautiful.
I am trapped.
The king will come again
to Spyre, Kristen."
- Where are you trapped?
How can I help you?
How do I stop the king?
- My bride's fiery hand
grasps mine in death,
and I must shield her from the
destruction that will come.
But I cannot do it as myself.
Know this, my champion.
My bride has a champion as well.
- Who? Can you give me
a name or a location?
- You know her already. Know
this, Kristen Applebees.
My shadow, my familiar,
would not have said something
with no meaning behind it.
And you see that she vanishes.
- Ragh?
- Or Lydia. Maybe Lydia
got corrupted by Bakur.
- Or Lydia's clone actually wasn't k*lled?
- f*ck.
- Or was k*lled,
and was brought back.
- Was brought back.
- [Brennan] We're gonna
go ahead and go to Riz.
- Blimey.
- Blimey, indeed.
By the way, just 'cause we're
moving through for time stuff,
Fig and Adaine go to a beautiful geocache
that is a cavern of immense-
all the most incredible
spell components you could ever want.
It's got like 10 Revivify
gems for Kristen.
It's got all kinds of expensive diamonds
and diamond quill ink for scribing stuff.
There are so many ancient
musical instruments from Ayda,
and they all lovingly
have little tags on them.
You see there's one alpine horn
that's supposed to stretch down a mountain
and call sheep from an entire region.
- I mean, look, I know my
future involves a writer's block
in which I switch from
instrument to instrument,
thinking that will solve it,
but I'm not currently there.
Is there a really sick bass?
- There's an incredibly sick bass.
- Okay, I'll take the
incredibly sick bass.
- [Brennan] I will get
that card to you ASAP.
- I feel so suddenly rich.
I have diamonds burning
holes in my pockets.
- Riz, go ahead and let me
know what the next roll is,
when you were thinking of unsolved clues.
- So yeah, the things I
was mentioning before were
the possibility of Bobby Dawn being
the champion of Ankarna.
There's also the possibility
that it would be Lydia's dead allies
that were maybe offered
something when they were k*lled,
and then there's the fact that
we had this clone of Lydia
that was apparently k*lled,
but maybe she's not.
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Or maybe Lydia herself is somehow...
- Yeah, you can do
multiple mystery tracks.
You can just keep gunning this down
as the downtime difficulty increases.
- All right, yeah.
- Yeah, let me know what
you wanna chase down,
especially after that figure.
So go ahead and call that 32.
What are you hunting down?
- That figure,
trying to figure out if
that was potentially...
It seemed, perhaps, like a cleric move,
so I will make a guess that
that is maybe Bobby Dawn?
- Okay, I think that you
cannot, sadly, rule it out.
Even on a 32, you cannot rule it out.
But you're not certain.
- Okay, then I guess
I will look more into-
we know that
Lydia Barkrock's allies died.
- Mm-hmm.
- Were their remains recovered?
Is there proof that they were buried,
and they stayed buried?
- You could even ask Lydia, maybe,
if there was something on them.
- Yeah, so go ahead and make
this next Investigation.
This is a DC 15.
- Okay.
- Here we go now.
- 28.
- 28. You pore over all of the
stuff from Cormyr and Rana.
You find an exact location
in the Mountains of Chaos
called the Temple of the Fallen Sun.
- S-U-N or S-O-N?
- S-U-N, S-U-N.
Looking at the Lake Shimmerstone stuff
you were talking about before,
you find a lot of that
non-magical force damage.
You also find, in the Loams,
some indication of some incredible ability
to stun opponents, that
they had no defense wounds.
You think the stunned
condition was brought into play
during some of these murders.
You also find, talking about Ruvina
the giantess goddess of winter and sorrow,
that her festival was called
the Festival of Frost.
- Oh, Frosty Fair.
- So you find a place within that,
and you see some writings
that are actually historical,
talking about a thing called
the w*r of Shattered Stones,
and it looks like from
a time period around
where Adaine pinpointed
the change in Ankarna,
the change, sort of, throughout.
Go ahead and give me
another downtime track roll.
[die rolling]
- 30.
- Okay.
What are you trying to track
down on this DC 20 roll?
- Okay, so we just did
Lydia's dead allies.
We did Bobby Dawn.
We were talking about
Root Wardens and stuff.
So I guess, sort of,
maybe the ecosystem around
the lake,
and the importance of it.
This might just be crazy
conspiracy theory, but I'm like,
are they really out there
just k*lling rats for fun?
Or are the rats like...
Part of the like-
They're drinking the water,
they're eating the f*cked up ground.
Are they literally grinding up rats?
- You beat the 20, right?
- Yeah, I got, like, a 30.
- You follow Fig out, as it's
getting closer and closer.
Fabian's birthday, at this point,
is like a week away, a
week and a half away.
The school's thing is still that they are
on their spring break adventure, right?
- That's what they say
about the Rat Grinders?
- [Brennan] About the Rat Grinders, yeah.
You go out to the Far Haven Woods
to find that glade near Lake Shimmerstone.
It's quite near Lake Shimmerstone.
- [Murph] Okay.
- Ground suffused with
crystals out in this glade.
Moreover, there are about
a month of old tracks in it.
You get magnifying glass
out, get down on the ground.
It looks like, at a certain point,
the Rat Grinders were brought here,
and a massive giant
was out here slaughtering deadly monsters.
- Can I have come?
- Yes, you can come.
- One second.
[soothing panpipe music]
[rats chittering]
- I put on my Mask of Animal Friendship.
- [Brennan] A bunch of little rats run in.
- I cast Comprehend Languages.
- Hi.
- Do we have any-
- [English accent] f*cking disgusting.
- Keep playing. They'll turn on us.
- If you have any questions for them, Riz.
- Okay, do you-
[Lou mimicking panpipes]
There was a giant here
that was k*lling monsters.
Was somebody Polymorphing rats?
- The rats speak and they say,
"Yeah, well, there was a big, scary giant
who came out here, and the little kids,
the little kid with
the puka shell necklace
and the ukulele came out,
and the giant would
take big scary monsters,
he would smash 'em up
and k*ll 'em and cut 'em and, you know,
do all kinds of stuff, and
then he would call up a kid
and say, 'Stab it in the head.'"
- So that they'd get the XP?
- For the k*lling blow? The final blow?
- So they weren't k*lling rats.
They were k*lling high-level monsters.
- But, like, not really.
- Oh my god!
- And that works?
- Who was the f*cking
giant who was in on it?
- Was it a boy giant or a girl giant?
- Looked like a boy giant.
- Pissed?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Can I ask you a question
about the rat city?
- Mm-hmm. Rat World?
- Yes, Rat World.
- With the mall?
- Yeah.
- What do you use for rat money?
- Rat dollars. Bye-bye!
[players shouting angrily]
- Rat dollars? Are you kidding me?
- [Brennan] Runs away.
- I didn't know
they were gonna run away.
- That's your DC 20. Go ahead
and give me your DC 25, Riz.
- Okay.
- That was your DC 20.
- So they're so high level.
- Can we have asked the rat,
before Adaine started
asking weird questions,
if Lucy Frostblade was with them
when they were doing that part of it?
- Yeah, Lucy was here.
- They made a deal with this
giant to get powered up.
Okay, yeah.
- And maybe the giant was using them,
and they just thought
it was a cool bargain,
like, "We're getting so strong!"
And then the giant smashed them,
put crystals in them, and
now that's the giant's army.
- Kinda made a sacrificial circle.
- So I think not all of them are...
Yeah, okay, so... Man,
what do we wanna know?
- Sandra Lynn is ready to take you guys
to the Mountains of Chaos
whenever you wanna go.
So Sandra Lynn can take you
to the Mountains of Chaos.
- Should we check out this
Temple of the Fallen Sun?
- Yeah, let's do it.
- Yeah.
- Temple of the Fallen Sun.
You also know where Ruben's house is,
which is the one Rat Grinder
that you know where their house is.
Before you head to the
mountains, your mom,
who was talking with Sandra
Lynn, basically goes,
if there feels like something that is not
adding up or not fitting together,
like, you keep getting this Barkrock thing
from Lydia over and over again,
she's like, "What I
used to do on the force,
get every file you've ever had
on Ragh Barkrock and
comb through everything,
as many years as you've known him,
from when he was a bad
guy in freshman year."
- I wanna know what level
the Rat Grinders are.
Does it say in Kipperlilly's-
- Ragh was pretty...
I feel like he got tricked
by Daybreak, right?
- Yeah, I mean-
- [Ally] He's pretty impressionable.
- We've already questioned Ragh,
but Ragh easily could've eaten that honey.
- Yeah, he could've had the devil's honey.
God, I don't want Ragh to
be the bad guy, though.
I love Ragh.
- [Emily & Zac] I don't
think he's the bad guy.
- I think could be the answer to...
- The night before you guys are gonna head
to the Mountains of Chaos,
now that Sandra Lynn
has that location, the
Temple of the Fallen Sun.
- I guess I'll look into Ragh.
I'll do my last
Investigation check on Ragh.
- [Brennan] Cool. Okay, cool.
- Can I give him the Help action?
- [Brennan] Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[dice rolling]
- 25's the highest.
- 25. 25 is the DC for Ragh.
- Great.
- So I think on a 25,
you gather all the materials
on Ragh from your office
over years and years and years
of doing mystery solving.
- Is there also a chance
that there was another Ragh Barkrock?
Looking more into the
name, in addition to-
- So, you will be able to roll that again
when you have a second.
I think you'll probably have to get
to the Mountains of Chaos,
where you'll be able
to go over everything.
The night before you leave,
you get a message at school
from Zara asking for you
to come by real quick.
- Oh, right.
- Just very quickly,
Zara meets up with you
up on the roof of the
school, sort of smiling,
and goes, "Figueroth."
- Hi.
- Thank you for this rotting flap of skin.
- Yeah, you're welcome, you know?
I think I actually passed the Last Stand,
so I don't technically need
an agreement but, you know,
Bill Seacaster could be my agreement.
I kinda have my own agreement now.
- Your bases are covered, which is nice.
- B-A-S-S-E-S.
- I shred.
- She says, "Do you remember your letter?
Do you mind if I read it to you?"
- I think I'd be really
embarrassed if you read it.
- Then I won't.
She closes it and says,
"I want you to know-"
- What did you write? I'm
gonna steal that letter.
- It was personal.
- She says, "I want you to
know that it is very strange
to not be a fan of Figueroth Faeth.
You have such a bright future.
I hope that you are happy.
Truthfully, your future is wide open.
What do you think you will do,
when you dream of the future?"
- Well, it feels good to
be writing music again,
and I think I'm gonna...
Can I do an Insight check?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Actually, I don't even do
it with disadvantage anymore.
Dirty 20. Do I feel like I can trust her?
- Yeah, on a dirty 20, I
think you can trust her.
- I'm gonna resurrect a dead god.
Or, rather, un-corrupt a dead god.
And then after I do that,
get back to the music.
Well, actually, no, the music and that
are sort of intertwining like a Stussy S.
- She smiles.
- So rad.
- She says, "There are two
reasons I wanted to talk to you,
the first of which is,
part of having a paramour that
is timeless is, sometimes,
you get messages from
different parts of time."
And you look up and see
that a meteor shower begins.
As a meteor shower starts,
it begins to spell in
words across the sky,
"My darling paramour, my
infernal flame, my Figueroth.
I sent these meteors to
you from the dawn of time,
when a rogue asteroid
almost hit my dad's jet ski.
Sundering the space
rock with but a gesture
of my most potent art,
the debris surrounded me,
and with it came the
sorrow of your absence.
I sent these rocky
chunks across the galaxy,
and they have traveled
since the beginning of time
to tell you that I love you.
In each moment of our mutual ignorance,
where we had yet to meet,
this message was already
spinning its way to you
through time and space to
illuminate the night sky,
to tell you that I love you.
Us, our love, like time,
has been inevitable and strange.
I have walked in its shadow joyfully.
It gives me peace to know
that in my darkest moments,
my love for you was already on its way,
flying through the stars.
We have been on our way to save us
since before the lights of
our world were first lit.
Pretty cool, my darling paramour.
P.S., I know
you have another year
of school after this,
but I hope one day soon,
you and I might travel
amongst these stars together.
XOXO, Ayda Aguefort.
P.S., you are not gonna believe
how much my dad spent on this jet ski."
- I think that I absolutely
flush and look at Zara and say,
excuse me, I have to go use the hot tub.
- You see Zara smiles and
says, "Oof, I can't blame you."
She just goes, "Do you ever...
If you wanted to go on
an adventure with her...
I know, from speaking with
you about your academics,
how much of this is because of
your loyalty to your friends."
- Riz.
- To Riz.
- Yeah.
- If you chose another path,
there would be a time soon to choose one
where it would not disadvantage
any of your loved ones,
and you could do what your heart desired.
- Yeah.
Yeah, um...
I've been thinking of that,
and I will...
I appreciate the vote of confidence.
- I have rarely been
so wowed by a student.
My confidence is yours forever.
Just getting to class at these late hours,
I really appreciate it.
- They're so much easier
than morning classes.
- All right, you have a hot tub to get to.
But number two reason,
whenever you have a chance,
this is the last thing
you need from me before-
- No, I already filled one out for you.
- You did?
- Yeah.
- Oh. Splendid.
- Yeah, I called you a hot goth.
Oh, I did in the letter too, though.
- Oh, well, inappropriate,
but you're not wrong.
She clasps your hand and says-
- It was fives across the board.
- Let's go, Zara Sool!
She smiles and says,
"I'll always be in your
corner, Fig Faeth."
- I think I'm also gonna be like,
I just realized I actually
can work a little chronomancy.
And I'm gonna sit down and
write a letter to Ayda,
knowing that when she reads
it, it will be the future.
- I love it, I love it.
- Powerful.
- And then I'm gonna
use the hot tub twice.
- [Brennan] Incredible.
I love it. You all head-
- Whose hot tub?
- Get out!
- Yeah, where is the hot tub?
- It's in Kristen's room.
- There's a hot tub in Kristen's room?
- We swap rooms.
I hang upside-down in
your room for a while
to work on my spine.
- With your rod?
- Yeah.
- Cool, after that interaction,
you watch a meteor shower
paint this love letter from
Ayda, and the next day,
all of you see, waiting
outside of Mordred Manor,
you see Lydia come down with
huge, giant trash bags of food
as there are seven
griffins out on the lawn,
all saddled up and ready to go.
- You can just grab...
You can just get griffins?
- Let me be clear. I'm an
incredible adventurer, okay?
You want griffins, I can get you griffins.
- That's good to know.
- Why not before?
- Well, they're park griffins.
This is ranger business.
- Are they safe?
[griffin whinnying]
- Fabian, don't keep
withdrawing your hand.
- What? Don't?
- I'm gonna put on my orangutan
mask and approach a griffin.
[Brennan squawking]
- Do you like me?
- It bows.
- I bow.
- Is Lydia coming with us?
- I didn't know you
wanted me to come with.
There's only seven griffins.
- Oh yeah, no worries.
- Do we have any questions for her before-
- Yeah, I was wondering,
Lydia, do you know...
Did you ever get to see
your clone that was attacked?
- No, I was deep underground.
I was sequestered by Aguefort's magic.
My experience was,
and Aguefort also didn't
tell me this was happening...
By the way, you guys all see
that Lydia's looking great.
She's looking really flush
and hale and healthy,
chest is healing.
- How's the physio?
- Physio's going great.
Ragh is being really sweet.
He's taking me to therapy,
and it's going really, really well.
- Is Ragh here?
- No, Ragh has his big
tryouts for the Buccaneers.
- Oh! I text him.
Good luck today, man. You got this.
- Break a leg, specifically
somebody else's.
- He sends back a bunch of
heart emojis to everybody.
- So we know that Ragh is in Bastion City.
Can I cast Locate Creature on Ragh?
- Yeah.
- Just to confirm.
- You know he is not within 1,000 feet.
He is not within 1,000 feet.
- And it's a new day, so I'll roll.
- [Brennan] Sandra Lynn says,
"So do you wanna go to Bastion City?
That's gonna take us a
couple hours out of our way."
- No, we've got the files on Ragh.
I'll look at them while
I'm on the griffin,
and then I'll beeline-
we can beeline-
- You're gonna throw up.
- Yeah, that's fine.
- We'll get you set up
when we get there, Riz, so that you don't
have to read them on
the back of a griffin.
- I'd prefer to ride on
the back of the griffin
with the papers flying everywhere.
The griffins know how to get there, right?
- I'll hold you and try to keep you level.
- [Murph] There you go.
- [Siobhan] Kristen's clone
needs a griffin as well,
so maybe you can ride with Gorgug.
- I can rode with Kristen Two.
- Okay.
- Kristen's clone? Or Kristen, too?
- I'll ride with Kristen's clone.
- She slaps you across the face and goes,
all right, all right, all right.
- She is still Kristen.
She's just straight, hornier Kristen.
- I thought she was British.
- That was British to her!
- Also, Adaine, can
you Reduce the Hangman?
- British doing an American
"Dazed and Confused" impression.
- Yeah, can I cast Reduce on the Hangman?
- Yes, please make me a little puppy.
- Actually, the Hangman
can fly on my pegasus.
- As a little puppy?
- Oh, yes.
- Still needs to be a puppy.
- Can you turn him into hellhound?
- Hangman, can you take
your hellhound form?
And then we're gonna put a dog on a horse.
- I prefer to be a motorcycle.
But that's okay, I'll do it.
You see he changes into a hellhound,
jumps on the back of the Daymare.
The Daymare takes off.
A dog riding a horse, can you believe it?
- Adorable!
- So, you all take off to
the Mountains of Chaos.
It is a long, all-day flight.
You only stop a couple times.
Your inner thighs, your
a*s, is just chapped.
It is a hard day's ride.
- My a*s!
- a*s! - [Siobhan] They're
predators, so they're not really-
they're bad for riding.
- [Brit-ish] Someone's
gonna need to rub my bum.
- You're all on griffins.
There's one griffin with two
Kristens holding each other.
Which one is British Kristen?
- Oi.
- Oi?
- [accented] What's all this, then?
And she jumps off to
be on Fabian's griffin.
- What? Ah! What?
- [accented] What's all this, then?
She swings up and she rides with Fabian.
- [Siobhan] She's her own
person. She's her own person.
- She always copies what
Kristen is wearing that day,
but makes it a little bit
tighter, a little bit more femme.
- Other Kristen, you're
supposed to be making it
so that nobody can tell which one-
- We're just the same.
- You're literally not.
- We're "litcherally" dressed the same.
- Twins are so weird.
- Twins are so weird.
- You fly and fly and fly
over the Mountains of Chaos.
Tall rocks, stones,
fade into peaks, mammoth valleys,
snow-capped mountaintops
framed against the sky.
As the sun sets so that
it is almost a red, angry,
burning ember in the western sky,
Sandra Lynn banks suddenly
and begins to turn, and
on a peak behind you,
you see, carved into the mountainside,
at first, the perspective seems normal,
but then you realize it is enormous.
The colonnades and opening of a temple
carved into the mountainside itself.
You see, all over this temple,
steps leading down to nothingness,
steps leading down to rocks and rubble,
and the bottom of the
mountain is filled with bones.
You look and see a temple
that is infernal in nature,
and surrounding the
peaks in all directions,
you see that beacon fires are lit
with a sickly green glow to them
as a warning to the peoples
of the Mountains of Chaos
not to come to this place.
- And Lydia's adventuring
party is buried here?
- You guys land on the steps.
Sandra Lynn says, "No no, not buried here,
but this is one of the
places they stopped at
on their adventure."
- And this is where we thought
that maybe they were...
That maybe the god was borne?
- It's the Temple of the Fallen Sun.
- Yeah, I mean, that makes sense.
It does sound like where
she was borne, B-O-R-N-E.
Maybe they brought her
body here after she died.
- Are the bones just giant bones?
- They are vastly humanoid-sized bones.
Larger, like big people,
mountain warrior-type people,
but there are some giant
bones down there as well.
Huge, 15-foot-tall bones.
- Can you do some kind
of divine sense to see-
- I can actually do Divine Sense.
- Oh, right, 'cause paladin.
- If someone has some kind of divine-
- If only somebody, anybody,
had some kinda divine sense.
- I start tuning my guitar
to get in the harmony of this location.
- It is effortless, because
this is a temple to your god.
You look and see, up above,
a glyph that has been hacked away,
a name erased, perhaps 1,000 years ago,
the name destroyed from
the lintel of the temple
and replaced with a simple
scratched ranger's warning.
Fallen temple; do not enter.
- Let's go in.
- Do I sense the location
of a Hallow spell,
celestial, fiend, or undead within 60 feet
that's not behind total cover?
- You do not.
- Do we think that the Rat
Grinders could be here?
- I cast See Invisibility on myself.
- [Brennan] Cool, See Invisibility.
- Can I cast Truesight on myself?
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Does someone else need
Truesight? I can cast that also.
- Yeah, I'll take it.
- You cast Truesight, Adaine?
- True Seeing, yes.
- True Seeing.
You see, in the scratched
Sylvan ranger's warning
that you believe used
to say Ankarna on it,
the nameless god glyph, unseen,
left with magic in this place.
- So somebody's tried to rewrite the name.
- Somebody's tried to rewrite the name.
But you also feel like there might be,
as bizarre as this is,
the followers of this...
Whoever's moving around,
trying to work this ritual of Ankarna,
doesn't know her name, so
there's just a glyph meaning her
without being her, right?
- Bobby maybe needed it.
- Yeah, I think that's why he
was trying to get that name.
- That could be totally
right. Who can see what?
- So you gave me Truesight?
- [Ally] Yeah, you guys
both have Truesight.
- [Brennan] You have Truesight,
and you have See Invisibility.
- I also have the invisibility thing
switched on, on my thing.
- Go ahead, as a group, and
give me an Investigation check.
- Yeah, I wanna know if we're
walking into a situation
that's populated in any way.
- 32. I rolled a 19.
- Jesus Christ.
- Nat 20.
- Wow! Holy sh*t!
- Thanks for the Truesight.
- Yes-uh! Yes-uh! Yes-uh!
- 15.
- What's that?
- 15.
- 15, okay.
- I got a 14.
- 14, cool.
- Five.
- Five.
- What did other Kristen get?
- Oh yeah, other Kristen?
Seven.
- As you walk in,
there are steps, you're fanning out.
This is the exact kind of
place adventurers get attacked.
Sandra Lynn looks at all of you and says,
"This place, the folk,
the people that live in
this part of the world
know that this place is here,
and keep it free of monsters.
This is sort of a cursed location
that has civilization
sort of surrounding it, for the most part.
I don't think new monsters
should have populated in here,
or they would have had to get
other regions and territories
to be able to get here."
- Yeah, unless they were
transported or something.
- Unless they were
transported or something.
Fig, you have walked
in these halls before.
You know this place. You feel it.
You hear people.
You look in the corner, and
see almost a flash or a vision.
Adaine, you can see this as well.
You can see it because Fig can see it.
You see that there are two
of these beautiful giantkin
who are kneeling down.
They have white robes,
and you see that they have
emblems of the sun around
them as they kneel down.
And you see an armored individual
that you can't even see what
it is, it's so heavily armored,
raise up a spiky axe
with a fiery emblem in it
and behead one, and behead the other.
And all of you see that,
and you see that there is
an ancient blood rivulet
that leaves and goes out
to the steps outside.
That's just in the antechamber.
You begin to move through, finding more.
You realize, based on the timing,
that this temple was built at
the beginning of the period
where Ankarna's domain was changing,
where the goddess was being reinterpreted.
- Borne.
- Do we get the impression
that those priests were
maybe priests of Sol?
- You don't.
- They're the new, corrupted-
- The old priests of Ankarna
being k*lled by the
new priests of Ankarna.
- Did it seem like those
sun things, was it like,
oh, those are Sol, or
those were pre-corruption-
- The runes on them were written in Giant,
so you believe they were Ankarna.
- Okay. I definitely-
can I write down that-
since I saw that, can I draw that-
- The symbol you saw? Yes, absolutely.
You draw the true
writing of Ankarna's name
as it was written in the primordial days.
- Just to say, I think I told everybody
what the message that I
got from Cassandra was,
about Ankarna needing help,
and Cassandra needed to
turn into the Nightmare King
to save her and all of
that, and a warning.
- So all of that, the
warning from Cassandra
that you got on losing all of your stress.
- She has a champion, also.
- And that she has a champion
also, and that it's Ragh.
- You begin to walk through this place,
and you see that this is a temple
built for empire.
It is a temple built for
the religion of a state.
And you see that there are these tall,
proud warriors everywhere that
have massive great-weapons
and fire and conquest and all this stuff.
You see fiery horses all around.
As you begin to move through,
you get into a chamber,
and you also begin to see...
Who here can read Giant?
- I cast Comprehend Languages.
- This is straight "Tomb Raider".
This is all you were doing
in your Night Yorb quest.
Adaine, walking through,
your eyes gleaming white.
Fig, you keep having visions
of what this place was.
This was a place dedicated, you realize,
to moving Ankarna from
the celestial heights
to the infernal realms by a people
that needed her to be
able to do that for them.
And why did they need that?
All of the etchings in stone
are of armies of this thing you see,
writing in Giant, and
you begin to translate.
All of these things basically
are different crests,
adages, religious words of prayer,
but the thing you keep seeing is-
- w*r of the Shattered Stone?
- w*r of the Shattered Stone,
and you also see a new word
that you did not see in these older books.
There might have been some
notes in a margin somewhere,
but you connect them here
in the actual writing.
'cause you also see that Cormyr did not-
Cormyr was a sorcerer
and had a limited selection of spells.
Comprehend Languages was not one of them.
So he did his best to transcribe stuff
and take meticulous notes,
but for not being able to read Giant...
He could read some Giant.
This is an ancient form of it.
- Sure.
- Right.
You see everything being like,
"This temple built in
the glory of Ankarna,"
and whenever it says Ankarna,
you see that the rangers
have come in and smashed that out,
but you know that's where
the name would be, right?
They knew enough to know where
the deity's actual name
was, and destroy it.
"This temple, in the glory
of [deliberate silence],
for the eternal honor of
the House of Sunstone.
Sunstone, clan of monarchs,
royal clan of the giantkin."
You move through this space,
continuing, continuing, continuing,
and you arrive at a massive chamber.
Within this chamber, you
see there is a massive altar
raised on multiple staggered platforms.
There is a sacrificial
space in front of it.
You see that there is a place,
almost like a kneeling block
like you would have for a guillotine,
but instead of where
a guillotine would be,
there is an iron brazier
with ancient coals in it
that you would make someone kneel
and push their face into burning coals.
Behind them, maybe 80 feet tall-
this chamber is filled with stillness.
You see many rows
of pictographs
interlaid with rows of runes,
commemorating battles.
The entire history of the
w*r of Shattered Stones
rests up on this wall
with stark poetry here.
You arrive in this space,
feeling the presence of Ankarna.
You know this is not where
she died, 'cause that was
in the Red Waste, but you
feel this is where she was-
- Changed.
- ...changed.
- And it feels like by doing
bad things in her name,
they were able to change her meaning.
- There is a relationship
between gods and mortals
that has push and pull on either side.
- So they were k*lling and sacrificing
the believers that had
the old vision of her,
and therefore way outnumbering them?
- And they were doing it because
they were getting invaded,
and they needed-
- They were doing it to change
the interpretation of what the god is.
- It seems like if this House of Sunstone
was basically like, we wanna
overpower the other houses,
let's try and corrupt this good
power into evil, so that...
And if we do all this stuff,
then we'll make her more
and more evil and infernal.
- And everything here is giant.
- Everything here is giant, except...
That's a good question. There's
lots of things that aren't.
Like, the brazier couldn't
fit a giant's head.
You think that's more humanoid-sized.
Riz, you have stuff you wanna
go over from your thing.
This wall is f*cking enormous.
There's a ton here to
just study regularly,
but I also know that people have
a lot of magical sh*t they can do as well,
so whatever you wanna do here, go for it.
- I'll give you the Help action
if you need it to investigate Ragh.
- Does the name in Giant, the old name,
the symbol of Ankarna in Giant
that I wrote out from her previous self,
is it pronounced differently
or is it the same?
- It's the same pronunciation, same name.
That's sort of the sacrilege
of what happened here,
is they really changed this
thing, but it was the same name.
It's like, we're going
to make you be different.
- Uh-huh. So with True Seeing,
we can see into the Ethereal Plane.
Are there ghosts here?
I mean, I know that Fig has
been seeing visions, but-
- You look in the Ethereal Plane, Adaine,
and have a start, as this
place is swarming with spirits.
They are not ghosts.
In other words, they are ghosts,
but they're not the
ghost monster stat block.
They have no desire in crossing over
to the material world and k*lling people.
- They're more like Edgar.
- Yes, they're more like Edgar.
They are echoes of the
people that died here,
and Fig's nat 20 and her
connection to the divinity
in this place is making her
be able to literally see
back through time to
what was happening here.
- Can I cast Legend Lore?
- Oh baby, can you cast Legend Lore.
For everyone watching at home who DMs,
if a wizard has Legend Lore,
assume they're gonna use
it and plan effectively.
Yeah, when I was gonna take it,
I texted Brennan, is it
okay if I take Legend Lore?
- That's the responsible thing to do,
because a campaign pre-Legend
Lore and post-Legend Lore
cannot be the same campaign.
- Yes.
- Riz, let me know what you
get on your Investigation
as you're looking at the Ragh stuff.
- Okay.
[dice rolling]
Nat 20.
- f*ck yes.
- [Emily] Yes!
- [Lou] Can't be stopped.
[breathy cheer]
- [Emily] Honor the c*ck!
- Never forget.
- Today-
- There's no c*ck on this one!
We don't have to honor the
c*ck. There was no c*ck on it.
- Today and every day, we honor the c*ck,
and in no moment more-
- No reason to honor the c*ck.
We're missing the meaning of it.
It's if it's c*ck,
you have to reroll it.
This is not one of those situations.
It's a natural 20. It was regular.
- [Brennan] So, how long does
it take to cast Legend Lore?
- 10 minutes.
- Fig, you are way deep
in the mountainside.
Your steps were unerring.
You have walked these halls before.
You arrive in this giant chamber.
Kristen, the twilight shards are so bright
that you have to put
extra fabric around them
'cause it's hurting people's
vision, they're so bright.
And you realize, Fig and Kristen,
your deities have been
in this room before.
- This is where they got married?
- No, they got married in Fallinel.
But you don't think they got married here.
- They got divorced here.
[Brennan snaps fingers]
- Oh no!
- Because she changed so much.
- Yeah.
- As you say that, you see a vision, Fig,
of a group of Sylvan elves
with symbols of Cassandra on
backing slowly away, placing
their weapons on the floor,
and you see javelins and
spears riddle their bodies
as they fall to the ground, dead.
You see a breaking
between followers of gods
that had been, at one point,
associated or seen as
part of a shared pantheon.
- But Cassandra wants
her back, though, right?
- Yes.
- Or wants her un-corrupted.
- Yes, and she's trying to protect her.
They're holding hands in
space right now, she said.
- That's cute.
- That's so romantic.
- [Ally] In outer space.
- It's like otters floating in the water,
and they're holding hands.
- As you two feel the presence
of these divinities here,
Sandra Lynn looks over and is like,
"I'm gonna go keep an eye on the exit,"
and has an arrow knocked to her bow.
- I'm just on the ground,
drawing chalk sigils.
- Can I prepare myself to
basically make my weapon sacred?
I'm kind of tracing this
little symbol I've found
on my bass guitar.
I just wanna prepare an action to,
the second things get bad,
channel who she was into my weapon.
- You begin to cast that.
On a nat 20 Investigation,
on a nat f*cking 20,
not only is this the exact
moment you needed it,
I also have never been more ready to honor
a nat 20 Investigation.
- Okay, okay, okay!
- Adaine, your Legend Lore begins.
"This is another casting
of the Legend Lore spell."
And this time, I'm gonna
say all of you guys
can see the spell around
Adaine as it begins.
"This Temple of the
Fallen Sun holds within it
the record of the Royal House of Sunstone,
high clan of the giantkin,
whose wars in antiquity conquered
all the clans of giantkin
within the Mountains of Chaos.
The clans of Thunderfist, of Hornspear,
of Moonpeak and Frostblade,
all fell to the wrath
of the imperial clan of Sunstone."
And all of you are seeing this play out,
visions, and see people...
"A time came in antiquity
when magical craft
and ships of sailing
came to a point of refinement,
where peoples that had
previously been separated
by wide tracts of land
came together in harmony,
and none were so beautiful of a moment
as that of the wedding of Cassandra,
goddess of twilight and mystery,
to the goddess Ankarna
of the dawn, of justice.
Their matrimony was
shepherded by the followers-"
- [whispered] Dawn of Justice.
- Dawn of Justice!
- Their matrimony was shepherded
by their honor attendants.
Ankarna by her attendant sister, Ruvina,
and Cassandra by her sister, Galicaea.
But another god was present.
The god Sol of the sun.
Sharing of a divine domain with Ankarna,
goddess of the dawn, Sol's desire
to officiate and sanction this wedding
was born of his desire
to see the gods' pantheon made whole.
But in the coming together
of these great beings,
after centuries of happiness and peace,
the leaders of the Church
of Sol became aware
that their domain was split,
and thus an idea was born.
You see it shows human clerics of Sol
speaking to these giant,
mountainous warriors,
who begin to speak back
and forth, armored up,
and you see they are going back and forth.
It says, "Ambitious always,
and wishing for power above all things,
the warriors of Clan Sunstone rose,
claiming Ankarna not as belonging
to all of the peoples of Spyre,
but belonging to none so much as them,
interpreting her as not a
goddess, but their goddess.
Theirs alone to bring an empire
upon the Mountains of Chaos."
- What happened to Sol?
- The damage was done, the idea seeded.
The clerics of Sol did not need
to shepherd this idea past its inception.
They needed only to convince those leaders
of the clan of Sunstone
of what would come,
and what would come was
an age of w*r and wrath.
You see Clan Sunstone warriors
murdering other clans,
taking over the lands of the Hornspear,
the Frostblade, all this other stuff.
Not until Clan Frostblade rose anew
with the power of Ruvina,
who had spoken to her clerics
of a need to stop her sister,
though she loved her still.
The w*r of Shattered Stone
saw revolution and rebellion
as the peoples of the Mountains of Chaos
rose up against the
Imperial House of Sunstone
to throw them to the ground.
And it was at the sundering
of the Cliffs of Colcath
where House Sunstone was
destroyed forevermore,
fleeing into obscurity
and secrecy forever.
Riz, on a nat 20 Investigation,
you're in the corner
going over this stuff about Ragh Barkrock.
You get to it. The connection.
Ragh and Kalina. Ragh and Kalina.
Kalina said Ragh. What
was their relationship?
What did Kalina know about Ragh?
Why would she say Ragh Barkrock?
It clearly wasn't the
point. It was at the edge.
It was past the edge of
her Spy's Tongue Curse.
She had to say it because
it was the closest thing
to all of the real things
that she couldn't say.
And you look at your notes from your caper
in sophomore year with the Nightmare King.
Kalina spread like a disease.
You look back at your notes.
How did Ragh get that curse?
How did Ragh actually
become able to see Kalina?
Ragh imparts to you-
- f*ck.
- ...that on the night
of the Prompocalypse,
he saw this person.
So, after the fight, I was pretty amped,
and afterwards, I was just kinda pumped,
and I was running around the school,
and, like, Jace and Porter
came and talked to me.
I was, like, still somewhat injured
after the fight with Kalvaxus,
and Porter did some, like,
barbarian healing stuff with me.
[tape rewinding]
Porter did some, like,
barbarian healing stuff with me.
- That b*tch!
- And after that,
I was, like, walking home,
and I saw this,
like, cat woman, this tabaxi.
- f*cking Porter.
- Ankarna's words to Fig.
You've known all along.
- I f*cking knew it.
- Porter's the champion?
- I even wrote on my f*cking thing,
'cause he said, "I have an old ancestor."
I wrote on my f*cking thing,
I still don't know if he's evil or not.
- The House of Sunstone
had to flee into obscurity
after they were overthrown,
after the breaking of
the Cliffs of Colcath.
- Cliffbreaker.
- Yeah.
- Son of a b*tch.
- You, Gorgug, flash back
to earlier this year.
When first learning to Divine Smite,
isn't it interesting
that Porter's a paladin?
You remember a giant stone in the room,
and he took a sword and,
whoosh, cut an obelisk in half.
Pretty strong. Pretty strong.
And you remember all of those
fallen trees in the woods.
You remember the shattered remnants
of Lydia Barkrock's home.
- So he can get big?
That's why I asked how
tall he was! [growls]
- He was also really pumped
about you becoming a paladin,
and also dissuaded you with Cassandra.
m*therf*cker.
- I knew he was a bad teacher!
I convinced myself-
- He was such a d*ck to you!
- What did you rate him, out of curiosity?
- Yeah, exactly?
- What'd you give him?
- It doesn't matter what I rated him!
- I gave him all fives, but
I wrote in the comments,
I still don't know if he's evil or not.
- What was his relationship
to the warlock teacher?
- [gasps] Is she okay?
- Give me an Insight check.
- Dirty 20.
- Hey, you were charmed by him. Was Zara?
Who knows. It's not immediately-
- Yeah, she's not necessarily-
- But you go back through years of this.
You go back through the
fact that in freshman year,
the two teachers who
came into the cafeteria,
very first time, were Porter
and Jace, side by side,
checking out the crime
scene, standing there
while Riz hid in the
corner waving at his mom.
- I always knew that was weird.
That was so weird. That
was so weird of them.
- And you remember in sophomore year, Riz,
what the f*ck is barbarian healing?
What the f*ck is barbarian healing?
You've never heard of a barbarian
having a feature that let them heal.
But I'll tell you what might
seem like barbarian healing.
- Lay on Hands.
- Multiclass barbarian.
- Oh, and he was so mad at
you muliclass barbarian.
- Him saying that he's a
paladin of his ancestry
is kind of sketchy.
- And what would Lay on
Hands allow you to do
if you were touching an injured person?
Pass Kalina on to them.
- Okay, so Porter's the champion,
and I guess...
What does that mean?
- Porter is the champion of Ankarna?
- Of the bad Ankarna.
- Yeah.
- So I think we've gotta
go f*cking k*ll him.
- He was the tall person in the video!
- The tall person in the video.
- Paladins can Revivify.
- [Brennan] Paladins can Revivify.
- Was he at school when we were
there these last few weeks?
- Yeah.
- Is he a full paladin?
'Cause he's a paladin of rage.
Is he not a barbarian at all?
- You think he might
genuinely be multiclass.
Barbarian/paladin's not a bad multiclass.
- He can get bigger.
He can go to 14 feet tall,
is what it seems like.
- You also realize, by the
way, as you look through it,
Lucy Frostblade was a frost genasi,
but frost genasi are like tieflings.
They crop up magically, right?
Genasi almost happen magically.
- He did act way too...
'Cause I was trying to probe him.
- Goliath are a type of
giantkin. Goliath speak Giant.
So you realize that all
these Sunstone people,
all the people you see on the wall,
this was a goliath empire.
This was an imperial house of goliath,
and you see all the other giantkin
that they were conquering
and other things like that.
But Lucy Frostblade, you go
look back at a picture of her.
Obviously she has the frost genasi stuff,
but if you go to her old
social media or whatever,
you see a baby picture of
her with two goliath parents
holding her in a house, happy and smiling.
- Okay, so he's definitely working
with Jace and
what's-her-face, Kipperlilly.
When's the last time they were here?
- The Legend Lore concludes,
"After the sundering of
the Cliffs of Colcath,
the Sunstone clan went into hiding,
dropping behind their old
name and assuming one anew.
The rebellion was fruitful.
The Frostblades, leading the charge,
destroyed the name
Ankarna in order to free
the corruption of her sister
from its current state.
Over the centuries, the
name, even, was lost.
Even in the casting of
this spell am I only able
to say the name because its
caster knows it already.
Many agents of the fallen goddess stayed,
working for her return.
The pit fiend Bakur,
corruption of Athenriel,
who was punished for his pride,
that the gods could live in peace together
when Ankarna's marriage failed,
the armor she made for
him to burn him forever
as a testament to the folly
for having introduced the gods
and allowed them to walk in
the mortal land of Fallinel.
Bakur was working until very recently
with the descendants of the
mortal followers of Ankarna,
but Bakur was betrayed by them
for a difference in their plans.
Bakur wished for the goddess to return
in her form as he remembered,
and the mortal followers of
Ankarna did not wish for this.
But their wishes, as
the wishes of mortals,
do not yet constitute a legend."
And the Legend Lore ends.
- Lydia's adventuring team
got sent to stop that,
because they run Aguefort,
and they could send them on a bad-
- So they basically stopped the summoning
of her previous self.
- Let's let Bakur out!
- You remember there was
something in the Bakur stuff
where Bakur actually mentioned,
I think back in Fallinel,
something about, "I was left hanging
by my mortal allies in my quest,"
and you remember Lydia
talking and being like,
"Yeah, Bakur's ritual
kind of didn't go off
for a couple reasons.
It wasn't in the right
place, and we were expecting
mortal followers to be
there, but we found none."
- Oh yeah, right.
- [Brennan] So it seems
like there was a difference,
literally, in what they were trying to do.
- You know what I'm
worried about right now?
We just played that spell
that everybody could hear
that said the name, and I'm worried
about Kipperlilly
Copperkettle having heard it.
And when I say her name,
I would like to cast
Raulothim's Psychic Lance.
- [Brennan] Okay.
- And if she's within 120 feet,
she has to make an
Intelligence saving throw.
- She is not within 120 feet.
- Okay.
- But you fire it off. It
resounds around this place.
I will take a moment now just to say
that I've been sitting on this secret
for five years of my real life,
and I told Emily at the
beginning of this season,
I said, "There's something I think Fig
will really, really
like about this season!"
- So that's why!
- The whole season is proving Fig right!
- Wow.
- I knew it!
It was weird he was there to begin with!
- [Brennan] Porter's
been bad the whole time!
- Jace being bad the whole time.
- There you go. Jace having the scar.
- Yeah.
- Does that make you conclude
that Jace is in charge?
- No, not at all.
But Jace was with Porter-
- Yeah, I'm sure he'd rather just be
alive than be dead.
- He's not a good guy.
- No.
- But he's coerced.
- It takes pretty incredible
courage to just cease to exist
instead of coming back, and
maybe he stopped short of that.
- So, you guys have cracked
this all the way open.
You realize the reason Kalina
kept saying Ragh Barkrock is
it was the only way she
could point you at Porter.
- Yeah.
- Right.
- She couldn't say Porter's name.
That's clearly who her
Spy's Tongue Curse was with,
was with Porter and Jace,
who she never mentioned.
- We have Bakur here, don't we?
- Yes, we should let him go.
- You think we should let him go?
- You wanna let him go?
- Let him out, to work with us.
- Wasn't he kinda messing with us?
- He did, toward the end. I
mean, he's still corrupted.
- I think Riz, you would
assume that he's working
on the same rules as Kalina, which is,
while his boss is bad, he's bad.
- Okay.
- Yeah, yeah.
- [Siobhan] So maybe
let's keep him in for now.
- Okay, we'll try to get him out later.
- Having said that, he is bad right now,
but is he necessarily allies
with the other people that are bad?
- That's good to keep in mind.
- Why don't we bust him
out in a bad situation
during the fight, if we need to?
- Yeah.
- Hell, yeah.
- Great, I'll spike it like
a grenade or something.
- Yeah, you pull a pin.
- Hell, yeah. Hell, yeah.
- Twisted Pokemon.
Go! It might attack me!
- Go, Bakur!
- [Siobhan] Hail Mary.
- Go, wild animal!
- And it's like...
- I'm so glad I got to let go
of that after all these years.
- And you knew it when he told
you not to follow Cassandra.
- I thought it was so weird he didn't.
I thought his, "I'm devoted
my ancestry," was weird.
I specifically asked him
about the chaos thing,
and he kind of deflected and was like,
"Oh, no no no, that's not a plane,"
and tried to change the subject.
- And he really wanted you to have rage.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.
- He really wanted you to have rage.
- Yeah, 'cause he wants
everyone to have rage.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- So, where you guys are at right now,
you see Sandra Lynn, seeing all of this,
looks and says, "Holy sh*t, okay.
Normally I let you kids run around
kinda doing stuff, you know?
It's okay for adults to help.
This is sort of an 'adults
are gonna help now' situation.
So you know it's Porter.
So you know that it's him.
You know the who. Do you know the what?
Do you know what they're
going to try to do?"
- We think that they've been
corrupting areas in Aguefort.
We think that they're
trying to set up Kipperlilly
to basically be the principal of Aguefort.
We think that they're basically putting
these rage crystals in the soil.
- And that she will become
principal just in time
for graduation, that
we all have to attend.
- She goes, "So there's
something they still need, right?
Anytime the world's not already blown up,
it means they can't blow
up the world yet, right?
So is there anything that
you think is critical
that they are waiting for or need
in order to be able to pull this off?"
- The election.
- The election?
- And the name, the name.
- Maybe the name.
- If it's the election, then
you have, I think, four days.
So I think it's time to get to stepping.
Let's get back to Elmville.
- Okay.
- Let's go kiss some babies.
- Before we go, are there any images
of Ankarna in this place?
- Yes, there are many. You see one.
You see there's one that's
beautiful of her surrounded
by stars that don't look
misshapen and angry.
There's a beautiful one,
surrounded by these shapes there.
Even in this imperial place,
there's one vision of her here.
- Still 24-point?
- Still 24-point.
- Cool.
- It's imperial art, right?
So it's beautiful, but she's armored.
She looks ferocious.
Unlike some places you've been in Spyre
that have skulls and evil t*rture sh*t,
this is very much like,
look at how strong we are.
Look at what we do to our enemies.
- There's a stylization to it.
- There's a stylization.
It's romanticized warfare, right?
- It's like Alphonse Mucha meets
Russian propaganda posters.
- Yeah. A goddess of conquest
as you would actually pitch her
if you wanted people to come and follow.
- I know that it doesn't
actually mean anything,
but I am gonna try to actually
cast Atonement on her image.
- I f*cking love it. Go
ahead and roll Performance.
- I think I'll do it by...
Technically it has rules here,
which is, DC Wisdom Insight check,
DC 20 Wisdom [Insight] check,
but I also know it's just her effigy.
I wanna play the song that I wrote her
about the avenging angel.
- One.
- And then should I roll Performance?
- [Brennan] Yeah, roll Performance.
[die rolling]
- I will take that.
- You hit a chord on your bass.
A metallic sound reverberates
through this place,
and your bass is accompanied
in its lowest note
by the sounding of horns.
The masonry crumbles,
and 40-foot-tall walls-
you all have to leap back
as massive stones fall
and shatter before you
and you see a final profanity,
which is that behind this place
is an even more ancient picture
of the goddess as she once was.
This temple was built on the bones
of a more ancient holy
place to her, and Kristen,
you see a beautiful dawn goddess
with points of light around
her in 24-pointed stars
that, rather than thin,
isosceles razor lines,
are softened and beautiful motes of light.
You see that she carries no weapon,
but in her hand, a set of scales,
and her other hand is not armed,
but is holding another hand.
- Keep breaking the wall!
Keep breaking the wall!
[Emily mimics a sick bass riff]
- It comes down. You see
ancient Giant writing on it,
and you see an image of your goddess,
and you see the stars of
Cassandra intermingling
with the stars of Ankarna
here in this place,
covered up for many long centuries.
- Cool.
- Sandra Lynn says, "Kiddos,
let's get on those griffins."
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You head out.
So to answer your question about,
why would Porter and Kalina work together-
- Yeah.
- Think about it as,
Cassandra also has a
corrupted version, right?
Cassandra, as the Nightmare King,
maybe has a relationship to
Ankarna in her infernal form.
But the history that Adaine
can carbon date, almost,
for you guys, is just
that Cassandra's fall
into the Nightmare King is many centuries
after Ankarna's infernal
fall and eventual death.
So the w*r of Shattered
Stones happened way longer ago
than the appearance of the Nightmare King.
So if you think about
Cassandra's situation,
Cassandra was happily married.
Her partner's followers...
Not just her partner's followers.
A fraction of her partner's followers
k*lled all the other
followers to change the god
to something that would help them
conquer and pursue a
material political agenda,
and then that caused the
marriage to dissolve.
Cassandra lost her partner,
and then when the w*r of
Shattered Stones happens,
and Ankarna went from being
infernal to being f*cking dead,
Cassandra was bound by
Obliviati Mori to never-
- Couldn't even talk about her ex.
- [Brennan] Couldn't
even talk about her ex.
- Like an NDA.
- Wow.
- Okay, I'm sorry to hark on about this,
but obviously Kipperlilly
is not within 120 feet,
or she passed her test.
Are there signs that other
people have been here recently?
- Yeah. On a nat 20 Investigation,
you see Porter's boot prints,
all of the boot prints.
There's very recent ones. Buddy
Dawn's shoe prints are here.
- Buddy Dawn's in on it.
- You see a 12 year long...
Those are very recent.
Like, last couple days.
- So Porter has just been
wanting to know the name Ankarna.
- Looks like it.
- f*ck.
- Do we see their boot prints
coming up from the stairs,
entering like we did, or do they have
a way of teleporting
in here, some sort of-
- You find evidence. You can
see it forensically, Riz.
It's like a dust blast
of how the air displaces
when people teleport.
- Jace.
- [Brennan] You see
Jace's footprints as well.
- I'm gonna f*cking-
- And Porter's been f*cking leveling up,
and all of f*cking
Kipperlilly's bullshit about,
"Oh, they're being favored!"
No, Porter's been taking them out.
He's the one who's been taking them out-
- But she started out being like,
this school clearly has favorites,
so I'm sure the second
someone was showing her
a little bit of favoritism,
she was so primed for it.
- She was like, I deserve this.
- Now, can a paladin cast Polymorph?
Or does that mean Jace
was Polymorphing for them?
- The rats were talking
about these big monsters
coming out to the Far Haven
Woods, but it's possible
that if Jace could teleport,
they could just go,
knock a big monster unconscious,
bring it to the woods,
and they might not have
even been Polymorphed.
They might have just been
bringing real monsters from-
- Do we think the giant
was Porter, in the woods?
- I think Adaine, looking
at an Enlarge/Reduce-
I think a lot of questions
get answered when you realize
that Porter and Jace have always been
kind of a duo at the school.
- Yeah.
- So Porter getting Enlarge cast on him
would be about 14 or 15 feet tall.
But you also remember,
who did Yolanda say she
was gonna go talk to?
Jace.
- Yes.
- And then Jace sent
her out to Shimmerstone,
where Lucy was buried, and the
trees were all felled, and-
- And Porter k*lled her.
- ...Porter k*lled her.
- I told Zara that I had pledged myself
to bringing back a god, an unnamed god.
- [Ally] That's good that
you didn't say anything.
- Wait, are all the teachers bad?
- No, no, no. I don't think Zara is bad.
- Can I Send to Jawbone?
- [Brennan] Yeah, do a Sending to Jawbone.
- [Zac] I'm thinking Henry Hopclap, too.
- And I say, Jawbone,
Porter is also involved
in the corrupted teachers.
Please be careful.
- You get a Sending back
from Jawbone saying,
"Understood. Be safe getting back here."
- Okay.
Okay.
- Okay, but Porter will know
that this is what we're on to,
if he presses Zara to be like,
has Fig declared her
agreement with herself yet?
- Can we follow the Rat
Grinders' tracks to see-
- Yeah, let's see, are
they setting anything up?
Is there some sort of ceremony?
- It looks like they've
come here to this place
to kind of do some ceremonies.
- I wonder if they're
gonna try and teleport
all of graduation here.
- I mean, if you have
a teleportation spell
and you cast the same
spell over and over again,
it becomes a permanent
teleportation circle.
- I think something
tickles your mind there
at teleportation circle, Adaine.
In terms of a mystery, it's
like the who, what, where.
Huge advancement of
"here's who we're dealing with."
And then the what, as you
say teleportation circle,
you're like, what was it...?
Bakur wanted to bring Ankarna
back, and the mortal followers
didn't like something about his plan.
And you just think about
teleportation circles for a second.
There's another thread here that leads
to one of those other huge
questions getting answered.
- Is it, if you're raging,
you can't cast spells?
- There's something at school
that looks like a teleportation circle?
- But it's something
specifically that Bakur wanted.
- Well, he wanted to
do it at the Red Waste.
- On that Legend Lore, I'll say, too,
that the association with the Red Waste
is where the last follower of Ankarna
who remembered her name was k*lled.
It was a member of House Sunstone,
that at that point was the Cliffbreakers,
out in hiding that was found and k*lled
by agents of the Frostblade
to go and wipe this-
- So then there was the flip
side of the ritual, right,
was the last follower was k*lled,
or where the god was k*lled,
or where the god was borne, right?
- [Siobhan] Right.
- But this is where she was borne.
- But they're trying to
learn her name, right?
- [Brennan] Fabian, Bakur's gem glows
in your pocket a little bit.
- Oh, gosh.
- Can we talk to him again?
I have the spell stocked.
- Yeah, if you want to.
- We've got questions.
- [Brennan] Yeah, so Bakur
[snarls] appears again.
- Do we wanna ask, what was
the thing that was different
between what you wanted and
what the mortals wanted?
- I think we know that.
I think we just don't
know the specifics of,
what kind of ritual did
the humans wanna do?
- What ritual did the humans want to do
to bring your goddess back?
- The mortals?
By the time I discovered
the mortals' betrayal,
it was too late.
I wanted to bring Ankarna
back in her full glory,
let her walk this earth as once she did.
In a circle of standing stones... [snorts]
No, I wanted her to come back, but-
- Fallinel?
- You see he goes,
"But I realized, the
mortals had other plans.
At any time
that the followers of my goddess
concocted a plan to slaughter
either Cassandra or,
more importantly, Ruvina,
her sister, whose followers
were hunting hers,
she would refuse to grant them spells.
She wished to conquer and dominate,
but there was some part of her,
no matter how much they prayed,
that would not harm Ruvina
or Cassandra.
I discovered all too late
that those mortals had
given up on Ankarna.
They want her armor, her
weaponry, her domain,
but I do not believe they want her.
They said something-"
- Sol?
- Do they wanna k*ll, maybe that's why-
- They k*ll her, and
then Sol has sole domain.
- But do they need her
name to finally off her?
- You see Bakur says,
"I remember, in defeat,
the heroes, Lydia Barkrock
and her companions
that captured me in the gem,
they spoke of this after I was captured.
I had made the error of placing my ritual
in the place of Ankarna's death.
But she need only be
remade
in a place where a god has been borne."
- Where was Helio borne?
- I know this.
- Where was Yes! borne?
- Oh, where was Yes! borne?
- In the gym.
- [Lou] Was it in the gym?
- In the gymnasium,
which is where graduation will be.
- [Brennan] You remember
Kipperlilly talking about,
at the beginning of the year-
- Was asking Jawbone about-
- Where Yes! was borne, yeah.
- Kalvaxus.
- Okay, I think that we
should send me back to Porter
and have me tell him that I know the name,
and give him a different name.
- Do you think he'll believe you?
- Can we get some devil's honey?
- Sandra Lynn says, "All right, g*ng.
You know a lot.
You know who your enemies are.
You know where they're gonna try to do
whatever the f*ck it is
they're gonna try to do,
but time is precious.
Let's get on these griffins
and get back home."
You guys fly to Elmville.
- I'm gonna mock up a fake version
of this Giant thing of Ankarna,
the thing I copied, her true name.
I basically wanna make a copy of it,
but f*ck it up a bunch.
- I'll translate it for you
so it looks real and in Giant.
- Tell him it's Clobica.
f*ck.
- With this, can I do
a Religion check-
- [Siobhan] Clocica.
- ...just to try to get this straight?
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- I'm trying to get the
what they're trying to do.
- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Does it seem like
they are trying to have enough
grasp on Ankarna to k*ll her
and have Sol be the only person
in this sun domain,
because he will grant them-
- I don't think any of
the material you guys have
is gonna spell out the
nature of what Porter,
as this scion of the Cliffbreakers,
what he's gonna try to do.
But you're back in Elmville,
and you have four days.
- [Siobhan] Great.
- Okay, try and make this
say something else in Giant,
and then I'll bring it in and be like,
you wanted me to choose an oath,
and we went to this
temple, and I found this.
- Great. Oh, in which case,
I'll cast Nystul's Magic Aura
on it, so it looks magically convincing.
- Do you wanna throw a Death
Ward or something on Fig?
- Definitely.
- Because if this goes wrong,
this is just probably a m*rder,
'cause he murders people.
- And because, I mean, you know, well,
do they know who Wanda Childa is?
Nobody knows who Wanda Childa is, right?
- Pretty much just Ruben
knows who Wanda Childa was.
- Wanda Childa is dead.
Yeah, Wanda Childa is dead in Fig's canon.
- For now!
- Also, real quick,
before you maybe go off
and get k*lled by this man,
Mazey was talking about this whole thing
where we could have a polling place,
at our place, at my birthday
party slash election night.
- Is there anything up with Mazey?
- No!
What?
- Is there anything up with Mazey?
- Yeah.
- What do you mean?
- She did change the rule.
- Are we sure that Mazey
is just being tricked?
- Has Mazey ever asked you about the god?
- Mazey wants it at your house.
- Yes.
- Why, though?
- She was talking about, for the votes.
I mean, she's pro-Kristen.
- It feels almost like a scheme, right?
- All right, everyone
needs to relax, okay?
- Has any other god been borne...
Where was the other
Yes-Question-Mark borne?
I guess in the-
- Can I try to remember
where I made all my gods?
- Cassandra was not borne anywhere by you,
'cause you reconstituted her.
And you realize the borne with an E
is where it first arrived in mortal-dom.
- 'Cause the second one
was a reinterpretation.
- Reinterpretation. It's the gymnasium.
- And where was Yes-Question-Mark made?
- Fig is right. That's a
reinterpretation, the god changed.
That location would be similar
to where Ankarna became
the goddess of conquest
after being goddess of the dawn.
- [indistinct] visions
of Fabian's birthday.
I mean, does it include being reborn?
Like being kicked out of the Astral Plane
into Fabian's house?
- I will say, to Fabian's point,
if there's some part of this
that they need someone to be president,
straight-up winning the...
Straight-up winning the election
does sort of prevent that.
- [Ally] I put on my Wranglers.
- Mazey could be sincere,
but it could just mean that
that is gonna be a situation
in which they rig the
election for themselves.
- [Ally] I have Zone of Truth.
- I'm thinking...
Mazey, I think, can't
be secretly bad,
because she's already the president.
Why wouldn't she just be-
- They would've k*lled her.
- If she was enough, they
would've launched it.
- Who said the thing? The
shoe would've already dropped.
It all would've already exploded.
- I mean, there are always gonna be people
who are just nice and
get manipulated for being so.
- If you think about-
you think about what
reason Mazey would have
for a teacher asking her to
do something, to not do it.
- [Murph] Right.
- [Siobhan] Right, okay.
- Cool. So, are we doing it?
Election night at my place?
- Yeah, we'll do election
night at your place.
We're doing tattoos there as well.
- Yes.
- Yes.
- I'm gonna head down to Party Village.
- [Siobhan] Always happy
hour with Applebees.
- Get some cups and stuff.
- We're gonna have to be on
high alert for that party,
because I think they're gonna
try and rig the election.
- Fabian, I think you need new fried rice.
- You guys, we have to stop the steal.
- We have to stop the steal, all right?
- This is gonna be coming out in, like,
three months ahead of the election.
- We have to stop the steal.
- This is gonna hurt to watch.
- [Brennan] This is gonna hurt to watch.
- We're patriots.
- [Lou] Exactly.
- We're simple patriots.
I zip-tie Mazey's hands.
- I'm gonna give you a Bardic.
- Thank god that this is not relevant.
All this happened years
ago. There's no new stuff.
- Okay.
- Okay, so yeah.
Basically, I think I've not really used
too much of the actual
one, I'm just doing...
I wanna have Adaine help me spell
something else in Giant,
but make it look like
I put it up against
the wall and copied it.
- Okay, go ahead and make
a forgery check for me.
Or it's magic, right?
- [Ally] What's the
name that we're picking?
- I think I'm just doing
a Deception, basically.
Yeah, what is the name we're
picking? What do we think-
- Long Tall Sally.
- Nope.
- Nope. Just so quick.
- Hilda.
- What about Bacharat?
- Bacharat. Okay, Bacharat.
- Bacharat!
- Badidas.
- No.
- Bacharath!
- Bacharath, great. I love that.
- Can I, just in case he
attacks you or something,
first off, can we get a Death
Ward or something on Fig?
- We have a Death Ward on
you. I cast Death Ward on Fig.
- Can I go invisible?
Can I go invisible and
stealth and follow you?
And I'll also record this interaction-
- Nice.
- Great.
- ...in case anything crazy happens.
- And I would love to
hide outside the window
and as this interaction is happening,
cast Detect Thoughts on Porter.
- And I'm gonna go buy party cups.
- Does he have anything for that?
He can Mindless Rage, right?
- Yeah, but if he's talking to Fig,
he won't be Mindlessly Raging.
- I will be outside, too.
- Cool, yeah, everybody just nearby.
- I'm gonna play it as casual as possible,
just so you guys know.
- So you have a tracing of
this name, and you're walking
up to Porter's office
at school, basically?
- Yeah, I think I'm just
gonna loudly kick a locker
outside of his office,
like in frustration.
- [Brennan] You see Porter
steps out of his office,
walks down the hall and says,
"Hello there, Ms. Faeth. How's it going?"
- I'm sure Zara has told you.
I gave her a note telling her
that I was feeling a lot of...
I gave her a very, very,
deeply tender, insecure note
that I wrote at a really
dark time in my life.
- All right.
- About how I was trying to
resurrect this god, which...
Anyways, I feel like I found its name,
and I just feel like if I'm
gonna get this agreement,
I have to know this name. [sighs]
- All right.
People that are present
here. Riz is invisible.
- I'm hiding outside.
I'm outside the window.
- Hiding outside the window.
You have Detect Thoughts active.
- I'm just listening to surface thoughts.
I'm not going any deeper.
- Cool.
- I'm hoping that Fig's-
- I'm outside the window.
- Gotcha.
- I'm also just gonna
quickly change the subject
like I normally would and be like,
what's going on with you and Zara anyways?
- That's not appropriate,
Ms. Faeth. That's all right.
- Oh god.
- Doing what now?
You see his surface thoughts
are just focusing in
on Fig saying something
about resurrecting something.
- Well, Zara asked me to make
an agreement with myself,
and in sent me into an existential spiral.
And I think for myself,
I really, really wanted
to come up with that
agreement with myself,
so I sent her a note.
So I was like, okay, but I
actually have an agreement now.
I have an agreement, and it's gonna be me
bringing back this dead
god that I believe in.
But I feel like in order for it to work,
I have to be able to say the name-
- What is this dead god
that you believe in?
- It's just this, like...
I'm holding this little thing I made,
and I'm just waving it around, gesturing.
- Cool, give me a Deception.
- Okay.
- You have a Bardic.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Actually, you crit.
- [claps] Yes!
- Porter's surface thoughts, Adaine.
"I can't believe it.
I can't believe it. She's walked into it."
He says, "What's that you've
got there in your hand?"
- This what I'm trying to f*cking...
'Cause I'm supposed to be a warlock,
and I'm supposed to make a
f*cking pact with someone,
and I was gonna make it with myself,
but if I could just make
it with someone else,
then that wouldn't put
the responsibility on me
to do any sort of introspection!
So I found this freaking, like, carving,
that I was like, okay, this is it,
but I don't know how
to f*cking speak Giant,
and it was stupid of me to even think
that I could f*cking speak Giant.
[exaggerated sigh]
You wanna practice smiting?
Oh my god, you should've seen how mad
Gorgug was the other day.
- Just all the things
he likes to talk about.
- You see he says, "Ms.
Faeth, would you mind
if I actually take that and
run that down in the library?"
- Oh, really? You can read this?
- I speak Giant, as a matter of course.
- Yeah, that would be a
huge f*cking help for me,
because then I can say,
my agreement is with...
Lucy!
- Hmm. Yeah, understood.
He looks so distracted right now.
Even for Porter, who's been
keeping up a good face.
Give me an Insight check.
[die rolling]
- 14.
- You get a vibe from Porter
that he's not even keeping up
a good face right now,
you know what I mean?
He's like, "Yeah, I'll
run it down for you.
That's all right. Here." Takes it.
- You want it? Come get it!
- Give that to me!
And he grabs it out of your hand.
Thank you, Ms. Faeth.
- I flex at him.
- Nice flex.
I'll make sure to get right
back to you with this.
Where are you in relation
to Fig right now?
- They were in the hallway?
- In the hallway, yes.
- I think I'm maybe in between the lockers
and the top of the ceiling.
- So you're up on the ceiling.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Porter suddenly stops
for a second, and Adaine,
you hear him say in his head, "Got it,"
and he turns and says, "Ms.
Faeth, one last thing."
- You wanna fight? Spar a little?
- I kinda do wanna fight a little bit.
- Do you know that I actually
finally f*cking smited?
- You smited?
- I did smite, yeah.
- Oh, way to go. How did it feel?
- It felt like a mean orgasm.
- That's exactly right.
That's exactly right.
And if it is partially a regular one,
that's okay, don't
judge yourself for that.
He says, "If you wanna spar a little bit,
I'll spar a little bit."
Give me a Constitution saving throw,
and I'm gonna need one from
Gorgug, Adaine, and Riz.
[die rolling]
- I'm gonna use a Luck point.
- Okay.
[dice rolling]
- Do you still have your Bardic,
'cause you didn't use
it on the other roll?
- Yeah, but I got a nat one.
- Nat 20.
- Un-f*cking-believable.
- Oh, it's beautiful.
- I needed it to be really good,
'cause I don't have good Con.
- I'm gonna use my Flash of
Genius to make mine an 18.
- [Brennan] 18, okay.
- I got a seven, and I'm assuming his DC
is way higher than 15,
'cause he's very strong.
- I got a nat one.
- Nat one.
Gorgug, Adaine, you lose
Concentration on Detect Thoughts.
He says, "I'll do a
little sparring." [roars]
Bam, and steps on the ground.
Stunned, stunned, stunned, not stunned.
He has some area of effect.
You all go flying and are knocked prone.
There is no damage
associated, but you remember
how many of the people died
with no defense wounds.
As he does that, Riz, because
of where you're hiding,
I'm gonna need you to make a Luck check,
and you've picked a
really good hiding place,
but in this moment, that's a disadvantage
for reasons I can't explain.
So I'm gonna need you
to roll a Luck check,
and you're gonna wanna hit, let's call it,
like before, a 17, 18, 19, or 20.
- [Siobhan] With disadvantage?
- No.
- 18.
- [Brennan] 18! 18!
Who is this f*cking man?
- A new Murph, baby.
- It's Moon Murph!
- Moon Murph!
- On that Luck check, Adaine,
the last thought you get,
someone told him something,
and you realize it was telepathic.
He goes bam, stuns all three of you.
The last thought you get is
a thought from Porter of,
"Did I lock the office?"
That's the last thought you get
from him. Riz, you are fine.
You would've dropped invisibility,
and that would've been
a f*cking sh*t-show.
That nat 20 followed by an
again, you picked a
really good hiding place.
You got the luck.
What the luck is, is the
very edge of your blindsense,
everything rattles, because
Porter stomps the ground,
but something rattles
right near you, a locker,
and you know for a fact
that an invisible creature just moved.
It was 15 feet away from you,
but it moved like an
inch off of the lockers
where it was also crouching,
an invisible thing,
in the direction of Fig and Porter.
And Porter goes, "Now now now, Ms. Faeth.
You've got to be better on your feet.
Wide stance, wide stance."
And goes to lift Fig up.
Combat does not ensue, but
all of you have watched
what you kind of would
clock as a legendary action.
Porter lifts you up and says,
"Brush it off, brush it off. Come on."
- Am I not stunned anymore?
- It takes what, in combat,
would be a couple rounds,
but you come out of it.
- What the f*ck was that?
- A couple of rounds?
- All of you come out of it,
but you come out of it
a little bit less fast.
I'm gonna say Fig gets
brushed off by Porter.
- What the f*ck was that,
and how do I do that?
- Well, I'll be happy to teach you.
Listen, we're getting to...
You got senior year.
Plenty of time to learn, and believe me,
this school's gonna be in
great shape for senior year.
Good on you, Ms. Faeth.
- Misty Step into his office.
[Brennan whoops joyfully]
♪ Ooh, child ♪
Let's go, let's go!
♪ Things are gonna get easier ♪
Un-f*cking-believable.
Riz, you teleport into the office.
Porter walks away.
Fig, as you're standing there,
and you, Gorgug and Adaine,
you guys get up outside,
Fabian and Kristen, if you
guys are on phones or whatever.
Riz, you're in Porter's office.
Do other people wanna risk
going into the office?
- No, I instead want to- 'cause I played
like I was buying into
that, so I instead wanna
go to light a cigarette
and accidentally trigger...
I basically wanna just be
so authentically myself
that it's disruptive, right
outside of the office.
- So you're just outside of
his office being distracting.
- I'm gonna light a cigarette
and then take out some drumsticks
and start drumming on the lockers.
- [Brennan] Incredible.
[mimics drumming] Sick as hell.
Riz, you're in Porter's office.
Go ahead and give me
an Investigation check.
- That's right.
- Keep it rolling.
[unimpressed sound]
- Going with Reliable Talent for a 23.
- Could I have given him a Bardic, though?
- Give him a Bardic. If you can get to 25,
that would be better.
- You have that Medal of Wit.
- Oh, I'll give you a 13.
- Oh, the Wit?
- The Medal of Wit.
- [Murph] Good time to use
that. I'll roll with advantage.
- Okay.
- Okay, even worse. So
- I gave you a 13.
- [Brennan] Adaine, through
the window, can give you a 13.
- Okay, so that then gets me to 26.
- [Brennan] 26, hell yeah.
- Should I do a Bardic?
- Yeah.
- See if I get an impossible one?
- If you roll a four, you
will clean this room out.
- And I sound like I'm writing
a really bad song that's...
♪ Ayda, I'd-a marry you ♪
- That's 10.
- That's a 10! Yeah!
- Damn! Rolls!
- What is this?
- From the f*cking briefcase, gloves on.
You are a ghost in this room.
Everything you find, we need
for posterity to understand,
Riz is able to deduce, discover,
and put back in less than two minutes.
There is information in here.
There's correspondence between
Halo St. Croix and Porter,
where Porter is effectively
intimidating Halo
into letting him, saying,
"As a multiclass paladin,
doesn't it make more sense
for me to train multiclass paladins?"
You see that at one point,
Lucy and Buddy had MCATs
signed by Porter to multiclass paladin.
You find a hard drive hidden
in a secret compartment
under an arcane lock that your
Arcadian Watch cuts through.
It could not be more sealed.
You find correspondence
between Bobby Dawn and Porter
where Bobby Dawn is
communicating to Porter,
and you just see the top
of a letter that says,
"My dear Mr. Cliffbreaker,
have you ever heard of a
thing called devil's honey?
I feel like it might be
able to help your plan,
to some degree.
While I don't claim your religion,
nor do I care for your divinity,
I think you and I share
one thing in common.
We are happy with the amount
of solar deities in the world.
I, for one, would welcome
a new god of w*r."
You see some medicine in Porter's desk
to help with an allergy
to feline dandruff,
and in parentheses, psychosomatic.
- He was hanging out with Kalina so much.
- [Emily] Oh!
- There are some flakes
of filo dough on the desk.
- Baklava!
- [Emily] [slams table] Baklava!
Baklava!
- [Lou] You know they're
eating baklava in church.
- There is a leather cord that
smells kind of rank to you,
and you see that it has a grip on it,
almost like a hand wrapping,
and you see that it's a twisted,
figure-eight leather cord,
and you're like, oh,
this would be worn on two hands shaking.
- Oh.
- Hand-fasting.
- A hand-fasting thing. Spy's Tongue.
You also see- now, this is the weird one,
and you remember this ties
back to something Aelwyn said.
You see there are so many
f*cking NutriBullets in here,
just blenders, blenders,
blenders, and as you smell them,
you smell this nectar-sweet
yogurt-y protein shake,
and as you look at it and sample it
in a little thing in your
briefcase that goes [beeping]
it comes up containing protein, whey,
several vitamin supplements,
and a huge amount of ambrosia.
- What did that do again?
- Aelywn was collecting that for-
- So, I have a question.
So, having used Detect Thoughts,
one of the things that you can
use Detect Thoughts for is,
you can use the spell to detect
the presence of thinking
creatures you can't see.
- Before you were stunned,
there was a brief moment
where you felt the presence
of Kipperlilly Copperkettle.
- Stunning.
- Who was invisible next to you.
You guys are so close. Like good and bad.
- I'd like to Misty Step
into where Fig is and go,
you know what would make
this song even sicker?
- What?
- f*cking Sickening Radiance!
And I would like to cast it on Fig
so that it crosses the
door of Porter's office.
- Okay, it crosses the
door of Porter's office.
- Rocking out.
- I love it.
I will allow you to mold
that spell any way you want.
It does not hit an invisible figure.
- It does stay up for a while.
- Cool.
- It's 10 minutes.
- Amazing.
Riz, the one big part of that
that is confusing to you is the ambrosia.
You know it as the food of the
gods. It's what the gods eat.
- Is it how he got so strong?
- Possibly.
- Did you already tell
us what ambrosia does?
Or did you just tell us
what devil's nectar does?
- Just the devil's nectar.
You guys know about-
ambrosia's the thing Aelwyn was getting,
but you just know that
as the food of the gods.
It's a food from divine realm.
- Protein. Is he giving it to the team?
- Yeah, the Rat Grinders,
to make them stronger?
Can you do, maybe, a Religion check,
to see if you've learned about
ambrosia in cleric class?
- Yeah.
- Maybe I can do an Arcana.
- You should do Arcana, 'cause
if it's a spell component-
- Yeah, I can use Arcana, also.
- On a 26 Arcana?
- Yeah.
- So, Religion would give
you different information.
On Arcana, you know mortals
are not supposed to eat ambrosia.
- But it seems like
multiple mortals have been
eating this ambrosia.
- Or just Porter.
- Porter's a big boy who works out a lot.
- Is this aren't supposed
to, or will k*ll them?
- Yeah.
- Is this, hee hee, I stole some ambrosia?
- Give me a Religion check.
You know mortals aren't supposed to do it,
and you know that it's from another plane.
- Is there something
to eating the ambrosia
to sustain the crystal inside of them?
- [Siobhan] Yeah, I mean, he also is-
- Instead of going crazy,
the ambrosia feeds that.
- Maybe he's trying to make
himself into a god king,
'cause if he's the king of this place-
- Oh, he's trying to be the god of w*r.
- He's trying to be the god of w*r.
- Yeah.
- So if he kills Ankarna,
he becomes the god of w*r?
- 'Cause he's the right hand person.
Does the main follower
take the god's place?
- What you know is, the
mortal followers of Ankarna
became frustrated over time
that she refused to deliver
a k*lling blow to Ruvina and Cassandra.
- And Porter would be willing to deliver.
- And he wants to take her
armor and weapons and stuff,
which is her divine attributes.
- Yeah.
- [Murph] He's prepping himself.
- Can any mortals-
- And that guy said,
I would welcome a new god of w*r.
He's basically like, I'll
come, I'll be a god of w*r.
I won't touch the sun.
- He's bulking.
- Does it look like he
could ingest that ambrosia?
- You're not supposed to,
but I think you see that he has, right?
- I mean, Lydia Barkrock can use her rage
to contain a demon.
Who knows what this guy can do with his?
- Can you do a Religion
check on it? I got a 12.
- Yeah, I failed mine. I
got a five and a seven.
- I'll do a Religion check,
'cause I'm religious these days.
- [Brennan] Go for it.
- Nope. I'm busy drumming.
- Can I give Kristen an 11?
- That would get me to a 15.
Sorry, that would get me to an 18.
- 18.
- And I'll Flash of Genius.
- Okay.
- 21 Religion.
- 21 Religion. Ambrosia
is the food of the gods.
A mortal eating it does die, but they die
because they actually don't
experience their heart stopping,
they just bodily ascend
to their afterlife.
- So maybe, is he using his rage
to contain his body in this life?
- So he's dead?
- He might not be dead yet.
He might not be dead yet.
But he's preparing...
It's basically like, I'm
eating god supplements.
- So that I can ascend.
- Damn.
- So looking at that, you also see
that there are a ton of
little encryptions and codes
with his communications with
the Rat Grinders in the office.
- Okay.
- And what you see
is that the Rat Grinders'
headquarters is Ruben's house,
and there's a lot of
communications back and forth,
and it's very clear he
sees them enough at school
that he doesn't have to
say anything incriminating
over text. He's not stupid.
But there's a lot of,
like, how are things going?
And it's like, "We're
headed over to Ruben's later
to work this problem out."
Things that are very vague and cryptic.
But you see, there is
a kind of understanding
that that's where sh*t is going down.
Cool. That day passes.
The next day, this is the
day before Fabian's party.
This is the day before
it's all gonna go down.
You guys, when do you wanna
try to head to Ruben's house?
- Do we wanna head to Ruben's house?
- [Brennan] You don't all have to go.
- I think we should go to Ruben's house.
I think let's prep. I don't know.
Maybe we gotta fight the Rat Grinders
and we gotta fight Porter another time,
but let's deal with the
Rat Grinders, right?
- Right, and we're going like-
- Wait, this is a new day?
- [Brennan] A new day, yeah.
- I think we're going in hot.
They're trying to summon...
We've seen Kipperlilly k*ll people.
- Okay.
- Oh, Kipperlilly wanted to k*ll you
because that would probably
help k*ll Cassandra.
- No, 'cause she's gonna be elected.
- Yeah, 'cause I'm the
runner up president.
You guys, can I be honest?
I'm getting kind of
annoyed with Kristen Two.
Does she have to come?
- It's a lot, and I'm so sorry.
- I love her.
- But here's the thing.
- She rounds out-
- Wait, are you Kristen Two doing-
[all laughing]
- [accented] You got me!
You f*cking scoundrel!
And I jump and I shove
your head into my chest.
I show you all my a*s and I run.
What are you waiting for?
- All right, all right.
- Kristen would've done that.
- There is some overlap.
- Kristen comes down from upstairs.
Are we going somewhere? You
guys don't tell me anything!
- When do you wanna head to Ruben's house?
- Okay, first things first,
I think just in case this
is all part of their...
Just in case we get there and
Kipperlilly's masterminded it
and we get trapped and
can't go to the ceremony
or something like that,
or if we're gonna miss
the party at Fabian's, I
wanna essentially maybe
get some of the evidence of like
the video that I have or something
and hmm... I'm trying to think
of who I could give it to.
- You could maybe set up something
that releases the video unless we stop it,
so it's already set up and
it's going to be released.
- [Murph] You can send it with your stuff.
- I will just put it in
my crystal in that way.
- You set up a video time
b*mb, just a mass email.
- [Murph] Send it to my mom and stuff.
- Fabian, can you check your nemesis list?
- Yeah, sure. I text, is it Josh?
- Alston.
- Alston! Hey, Josh...
Yeah, can I check my nemesis list?
- Doubling down.
- It's still just Chungledown Bim.
- Just Chungledown?
- Yeah, Gertie's off.
- Again, you call me the
minute that changes, all right?
- You got it.
- Can I text Aelwyn?
Because Aelwyn is an abjuration wizard.
- [Brennan] Yes.
- Hey, I know you're busy.
Was wondering if you could cast some wards
on Fabian's house.
- [Brennan] She shrugs
and says, "All right.
I'll stop by and try to cast
some wards on Seacaster."
- Does she have Guards and Wards?
- Almost certainly, yes.
- There's a 6th level spell.
- She says, "I can cast Guards and Wards
on Seacaster Manor."
- You need a password for it.
- Oh yeah, can you give us the password?
What disgusting thing are
you gonna have us say?
- Can we put it on the voting booth?
- You're having a voting booth at a party?
- The password is "stop the steal."
- [Brennan] Aelwyn says she's got it.
- Okay.
- Aelwyn says she's got it.
- Okay, great. Text us the password.
Make sure it's not "stop the steal."
- I'm sorry, you're against that?
- Jesus Christ.
- Okay, cool.
- Kristen Two is too much.
- Am I the only one awake?
- When do you head to Ruben's house?
- Yeah, let's just go, right?
- Kristen Two is on the
Hangman with me. Let's do it.
- [Zac] Spring break, I believe in you.
- Spring break, I believe in you!
- Spring break, I believe in you.
- Does someone have
Teleport or Plane Shift?
- Cool.
- What is that?
- All good. Sorry.
- Does someone have
Teleport or Plane Shift?
- [Ally] I have Plane Shift.
- Maybe we should just
teleport in the middle and
just start fighting them.
- Plane Shift won't work to...
But I can Scatter us in there,
or I can Scatter five of us in there.
- Yeah.
- So sorry, Kristen Two, you're out.
- I'm Kristen One, and if you
guys keep getting this wrong,
I'm literally gonna k*ll her myself.
- You look good today. Your
clothes look really tight.
- You all go to Ruben's house.
You go in the middle of the
day, which was the right choice,
and I rolled a Luck check to
see if anybody would be there,
and no one was there.
- [Siobhan] Hell, yes!
- Carte blanche, but also,
where are they? Not at school.
- Let me go ahead, can I sneak ahead
and essentially case the whole place
to make sure-
to see if anyone else is home,
to kinda make it so the
less stealthy people
in the party can open things?
- Let's get in there.
- Yeah, I'll cast Rary's
Telepathic Bond on all of us
so we can be quiet.
- Cool.
- Cool, and then I'm going to sneak in.
- Oh, can I cast True Seeing on Riz?
- Oh, awesome. True Seeing on Riz.
- I cast Invisibility on myself
so only Kristen Two is visible.
- Riz, go ahead, first of all,
give me a thieves' tools check.
[die rolling]
- That's a
- Jesus, okay.
Riz, you walk up.
Arcadian watch. [beeping]
Laser forms a holographic key
that quickly materializes, opens the door.
You're in.
- And also, my watch
automatically retains an imprint
of any lock it unlocks, so
if somebody casts that spell,
I'd like to keep that in mind
for if there's something else locked.
- Copy that, amazing.
So you get in and have a key
to every other entrance
in the house, essentially.
Invisible, telepathic bond.
Are you invisible right now or no?
- I am not right now, no.
- Okay, give me a Stealth
check, number one.
- Cool.
[die rolling]
Reliable Talent, 24.
- You move through the house.
Go ahead and give me Investigation.
[die rolling]
- It was so close to a nat
- Are you planning on
having other people come in
and being able to do other checks as well?
- Yeah.
- I think I should come in.
- I could come in with Mislead-
- I think I'm essentially
trying to investigate
to be like, okay, is
there an Alarm spell here?
I'm trying to just secure
the scene so that when
the six of us come in and
we're much less stealthy,
nobody's tripping alarms or anything.
- Gotcha, if you're being that careful
and you just rolled a-
- 27.
- ...27, you get through, you
clock multiple Alarm spells.
There is a Guards and Wards on the place.
There's these other abjurational spells
all over Ruben's house, and I'm gonna say
that given that there's
no one home right now
and you guys have a full
array of spell slots,
it's just a matter of time.
It's quick work. Dispel,
Dispel, wait for one to work.
With Reliable Talent, all
these DCs are like 20.
There's not even really
a point in rolling.
You just go, "Got it, got it."
- Yeah, I think as we're going,
I'm just, like, Prestidigitation
on a camera or whatever
so these guys see it.
I just put a little light
up and keep sneaking.
- Cool. One by one, you get through,
never getting on camera,
and even using little
Prestidigitations to point them out,
and also just to cover.
So, you guys get into this
place. You are now all here.
You have cased the house,
shut it down, alarms down,
and even get a Dispel Magic on
top of that Guards and Wards.
The only way to get this perfectly safe
so that you can work thoroughly
means they will be able
to discover you were here.
These spells coming down will be an alert,
but it will be an alert way later.
- Okay, got it. Not in real time.
- [Brennan] So that's just something
you gotta make peace with.
- They'll know, but we
will have already left.
- Yes, correct. Let's make some rolls.
Give me Investigation,
Arcana, Religion, History,
whatever the f*ck you wanna do.
- I'm gonna give Riz the Help action.
- I give, are you good?
- I mean, I'll take the Help
action just to see if I crit.
I don't. I got a 28 Arcana.
- [Murph] 28 Investigate.
- Could I do a tinkerer's
tools to see if...?
- [Brennan] Yeah, give me tinkerers.
- That's a 24.
- Okay.
- 19 Religion.
- 19 Religion? Hell, yeah.
Anyone gonna use a Bardic or a
Guidance or a this or a that?
- Anyone wanna help me
get up to 30? I'm at 28.
- [Emily] Yeah, I can give you a Bardic.
- Oh wait, I already have a Bardic.
- You have a Bardic, yep.
- You gave one to me before.
- I can do Guidance, though.
That's a d4, and you can save the Bardic.
- That's a 32.
- Great.
- I'll also-
- What are you at right now?
- 18.
- ...Divine Sense to find out-
- That's a 32.
- You get your Divine Sense up
and sniff out the room
for the Religion check,
and you see the stuff we're all...
There's a secret panel in Ruben's place.
You move this aside. Riz,
you're investigating.
You're looking at Arcana.
Here's what you get.
Adaine, you find Oisin's area.
You find his wizard
tower in Ruben's mansion,
which is an old sound studio
that has been turned into
a little wizard sanctum.
You see he's working on
tons of conjuration stuff.
Riz, as you're sweeping
that room with Adaine,
you guys are kind of tag-teaming
to put stuff together.
You find a family photo from Oisin
of his
great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great
grandmother hanging out with Kalvaxus.
- f*cking dragons.
- Gotta help Grandma out.
In Oisin's area, Adaine,
he's got a bunch of stuff.
There's stuff about Cloud Rider there.
He's a conjuration specialist.
He has some notes on
stealing summons from people.
- Oh, so he ways to take
over other people's summons.
- In this sound studio, you
also see notes from Porter
on Ruben's composition, crafting a song,
and it's "Get Mad".
It's the song he performed at Frosty Fair.
- He's a bard, too.
- Oisin has some notes on
something you don't understand,
which is a tool,
a practice series of hand motions,
for telekinetically writing
on the inside of a sphere.
- A gem?
- Or a skull?
- Or a voting booth?
- A spherical voting booth, potentially.
On that tinker's tool, Gorgug,
you actually get a computer
and crack the private server
that the Rat Grinders were talking on.
So you see all of their stuff.
- I'm in.
- Kipperlilly corrects someone and says,
"We don't use the name Cassandra.
NMK, that's how we refer to her."
- Nightmare King.
- Nightmare King.
It says, "Big guy wants
the Nightmare King.
Says that he should have her locked down
sooner rather than later,
as soon as she exposes
herself in the Astral."
- And Kalina convinced her to go there.
She's been working...
Yeah, there is no such
thing as a good Kalina.
- You see old stuff in
the Rat Grinders' chain.
It's from last year, being
like, "This is really exciting.
The big guy's been looking
out for us for a long time.
Lucy, you get to be the CHAMPION!"
And champion is all caps-locked.
- But she didn't wanna be.
- Kipperlilly saying,
"This is gonna let us finally
keep up with the Bad Kids."
Stuff about Yes! from earlier in the year,
stuff about how they're like,
JSD is really tied down
because he's vice principal.
There's a lot of stuff he can't do.
On the Religion check, Fig,
you get your Divine Sense.
Kristen, you go find this stuff here.
You see stuff about the ritual.
So, this is all stuff that
Buddy was working on with them,
and you see a lot of stuff
in here about the ritual
that Buddy was gonna help them with.
The things that they needed, it said,
"Location, where god was
borne," is one thing they need.
- How do they spell it?
- B-O-R-N-E.
- They spelled it-
- Spelled it the right way.
- And she found that out from
Jawbone, through her therapy.
- It says, big thing that is underlined,
"Must have president,"
underlined, underlined,
underlined, underlined.
- Why do they have to have a president?
- You see that they have
the same bylaws you do.
The ones that are circled
that they wanna change,
here's the big one.
Kipperlilly has already
drafted an order as president
disbanding the Aguefort
Adventuring Academy in perpetuity,
nullifying its protections and wards.
The central one circled by
them, that the town of Elmville
may not be moved to any
other plane of existence
while the Aguefort Adventuring
Academy is in session.
Riz, you flash to the Root Warden tree.
You flash to soil all over.
- The entire town is going to be moved.
- So it is a teleportation,
with all these rage crystals.
- And that's why they've
been casting it so often,
so that they can have teleportation-
- That's the teleportation circle.
- Circle, is the whole-
- Is all of Elmville.
- Is everything inside.
- Where are they taking it?
- To the Astral Plane?
- Or to the new city, that temple?
Trying to repopulate that temple?
- You see a lot of
reference in Buddy's writing
to divine domains.
As you remember, Ankarna's was moved
to the bottom of the Bottomless Pit.
There's a lot of writing
about Buddy being like,
"Hey g*ng, I'm confused about
what kinda divine domain
we're talking about," and
Oisin has a little joke
in a private chat with just him and Ivy
where he's like, "Hayseed
doesn't seem to get
that this divine domain doesn't exist."
So the Nightmare King is part of it.
You see Ruben's performance
is all about preparing a divine domain.
The divine domain needs to have
the power of the god suffused through it.
Another reason Bakur failed
is that his ritual happened
in a desolate place,
and for this divine realm to happen,
it needs divine followers,
and they need to be angry.
Kipperlilly's already drafted that order,
that the moment she is president,
she will disband the
Aguefort Adventuring Academy.
There's also way earlier
texts between the Rat Grinders
prior to Buddy coming to the
school talking about what-
they never mention Lucy by name,
but they're just going like,
"What are we going to do?
What are we gonna do after this?"
And you see one of them saying,
"We're all in this together now,"
is one of the things they say.
You see that there's a communication here
that says, "Talk to big guy.
It's actually not to do with bloodline.
It didn't matter that Lucy's family
were from the Mountains of Chaos.
What mattered is, her
goddess had a connection
to the big guy's deity."
And then it says with this one,
"Found some candidates that
have enough of a connection.
Was told to look for solar
clerics, question mark?
Kid, Buddy Dawn from
Highcourt, is moving here.
Possible prospect."
- So, I have a question about Lucy.
Ankarna refused to do any k*lling blow
against anybody who was
a follower of her sister.
- Oh, no no no. Followers
got slaughtered en masse.
- Oh, it's just she wouldn't
do it on the goddess herself.
- [Brennan] On the goddess herself, yeah.
- Okay.
- You see a bunch of texts and messages
from a burner account
that, through context,
you begin to realize is
definitely Jace, saying,
"Stop antagonizing the
f*cking Bad Kids. Stop.
I know you little idiots want revenge.
You stay in line until
we're ready to move."
- Revenge?
- Revenge? What did we even do?
These guys are obsessed with us.
- Oh my god, is one of
them the child of Doreen?
- [Lou] Or, perhaps, what about-
- Kalvaxus.
- Kalvaxus.
- Kalvaxus.
- Who else have we fought and k*lled?
- Yeah, why would Ruben want revenge?
- Do they all have-
- Daybreak?
- Well, you all see that
those texts come from
after you are thinking they
maybe got shatter-starred.
So the revenge thing could
just be that they're-
- They hate us 'cause-
- They're hyper-focused.
- And we're kind of poking
at them every interaction.
- The hate us 'cause they ain't us.
- In Oisin's room, there's lots of stuff
about dragons and stealing summons.
There's a lot of stuff, you
see he has a lot of connections
between the Nightmare King
and storms specifically.
You remember how cloudy the
Nightmare King's realm was.
And you see that there's
an image of a nascent,
almost like a fetal god, and
the arms of the Nightmare King
covering and protecting that deity.
- I wanna know Ivy's
deal. I wanna know Mary-
- Oh yeah, what subclasses are they?
- Oh, what their deals are?
Ivy is Arcane Archer/Gloom Stalker.
- That's bad.
- Mary Ann is Berserker.
Oisin is Conjuration.
Kipperlilly is Mastermind.
- Buddy's Light?
- Buddy is Light, and then Ruben, I think,
might actually be Whispers.
So the big picture things for the ritual,
what they need to do:
Has to be at a place a god was borne.
They need Aguefort to formally not exist.
You see lots of schematics
about the Thistlespring Tree,
the schematics for the
stingers under the stage,
the idea of spreading this.
It's like the rage song is a reflection
of the rage crystals in the
ground that are creating
the psychic dimension
for what is materially,
literally in the soil of the town, right?
You see that the ritual
has to be performed
the moment that Aguefort's
no longer blocking them
from being able to do it.
The last thing you see is this.
They need a physical body,
and you see that the plan
is fundamentally for Porter
to become a new deity,
for Porter to basically-
- Ascend.
- ...ascend, take the divinity
of a dead god and be like,
"We tried and tried
and tried for centuries
to get this goddess to
be only w*r and conquest,
but no matter how much stone you put up,
the old stuff is behind it.
Better to k*ll her and start new."
And then you remember that
Porter wielding this power,
devil's honey lets you lie in prayers.
So even Porter communicating to Ankarna
would be able to potentially deceive her.
- He's probably one of the
only people left believing.
- Well, that's the thing,
is if he genuinely believed in her,
she might be able to come
back from the dead, but-
- Right, he believes in this
false version of her.
- He believes in the domain.
He believes in the false version of her,
and he believes in the domain of her,
and is using devil's honey.
But also, not knowing
her name would stop him.
So, the last few things.
Physical body, and this is referred to
as the Heir of the Cliffbreakers.
The last two is-
- I knew it.
"My family is my-
I'm a paladin of my
f*cking family lineage"?
- And your family is an
imperial, conquering house.
Protective storm is
another part of the ritual,
the protective shroud
of the Nightmare King.
The last thing that he needs is,
he needs the name of the goddess,
and he needs his name
inscribed on a scroll of the ritual
as the new name of that domain,
and it needs to be written
by the champion of the old goddess.
- Fig.
- Oh!
- The teacher evaluation?
- When you did your teacher evaluations?
- [gasps] You wrote Porter's name!
- You're the champion.
- Is that why he's mad that you split it?
You made him split it?
- You get an email from
Zara saying, "I checked.
No teacher evaluation
was submitted for me."
- 'Cause they were both on
the same piece of paper?
- So I needed to write his name?
- The champion of the
goddess needs to write,
on a ritual scroll, the
name of the new god.
And you remember earlier
in the year when Porter
caught you trying to switch
the MCATs for Gorgug.
- That's why he wanted you-
- f*ck.
- To multiclass.
- God!
- [Ally] If you were already the champion.
- That's so smart for somebody who-
- So he knew you were the
champion that whole time?
- Well, I wasn't the champion.
- He made you the champion.
- He wanted me, that's why-
- [Murph] He manipulated
you into being the champion.
- Yeah.
- f*ck.
- So he just kept that
paper. That's the contract.
So he's got that part, his name inscribed.
- But he doesn't have the name.
- He needs the other stuff.
He doesn't have the name.
- He doesn't have the name.
- And he doesn't have the president.
- Can I pledge myself to a
different god and break it?
- I mean, you'd have to
break off your belief,
and that seems, I don't
know, pretty intense?
- What I'm worried about
is Kristen getting elected
and then them taking over her mind.
So can we make sure that we put some
anti-controlling-
- Yeah.
- Sure.
- I don't know exactly what that is, but-
- I also think we have to try
and do some wards in the...
in the gym. And also, this
is a crazy suggestion,
is there any way that we
could take devil's honey
to believe the fake name?
- To believe in this new name.
- Is there devil honey around this house?
- No, you actually don't think
the Rat Grinders seem to reference it.
It seems to be something
that Porter was using.
- Oh, okay.
- Porter's using it so he can lie to gods.
But the thing is, is that
if we forget it, then-
- No, we give it to someone safe
who's not here at all, right?
It's mainly so that they
can't try to read our minds
and know the true name.
- I mean, they might
have already done that.
Although, I mean, Porter
seems convinced by your-
- He has the other one.
- The protective storm.
Does that have to do with the Cloud Rider?
- Unclear.
- Are they gonna lift the gymnasium-
- Into the sky?
Oh, that f*cking aviation kid? Can we...
f*ck.
- I think you guys have spent
a ton of time in Ruben's place.
- Yeah, we gotta get out of here.
- You guys head out. The next day comes.
Porter is not at school.
Zara emails you about the fact,
she confirms that the teacher's evaluation
never got to the faculty,
never got to Mazey.
You have your day at school,
and the party of the century.
Mazey's ready with the voting booth.
- Oh my god.
- Jawbone is gonna be
overseeing the voting booth
to make sure everything's
fair and above board.
- Did Kipperlilly make a big push today?
- Kipperlilly did not
make a big push today.
- Yeah, they already have it all ready.
- Is she anywhere to be-
- It seems like they are going
to make themselves known.
- What's the brand of the
voting booth that we're using?
- Hm? Oh, they are.
Kipperlilly's a no show to her own speech.
- [Siobhan] To her own speech.
- Kristen, you give
your speech at Aguefort.
Is there anything Kristen says?
- I send my double, and I'm invisible.
- Holy f*ck.
- Great.
- Kristen Two gives the
speech. Can't be too careful.
She stays to the talking points.
- I wanna have my Divine
Sense up to see if...
to see if Ivy's trying
to Hunter's Mark anyone.
- Okay.
- Are they even at school?
Ivy and all them?
- We haven't seen them.
- Haven't seen them.
- Okay.
- I'll cast Intellect
Fortress on Kristen Two.
- [Brennan] Cool.
- That means she has
resistance to psychic damage,
and she has advantage on Intelligence,
Wisdom, and Charisma throws.
- [Brennan] Awesome.
Kristen Two makes a speech.
- [accented] This year's
gonna be brilliant.
- [Brennan] Incredible.
People applaud outrageously.
- Thank you.
- You see a bunch of
people tell Kristen Two,
"See you tonight at Seacaster Manor!"
- You're f*cking right you will!
- Hey, all right!
- I slap them way too hard.
- Ow!
- Come here!
- Throwing Cadbury Eggs
out into the crowd.
Eggs for everyone!
- Eggs! Eggs!
- Eggs! Eggs!
- Incredible.
- Instead of kissing babies?
- I'm putting babies on my boobs.
- That night, it is the night
of the election night
party at Seacaster Manor.
People begin flooding in.
Jawbone has a little straw
hat that says vote on it.
He's very excited. He's
waving a little thing.
Let's go, democracy! All right!
- Who'd you vote for, Jawbone?
- I can't vote. I'm not a student.
- Wait, non-students can't vote?
All the steelworkers?
- Aelwyn's got this place loaded up
front to back with wards and protections.
- [Siobhan] Great.
- There's a little sweet note
from Aelwyn on the kitchen counter saying,
"I think you and Mazey are very cute."
- I burn it before Mazey ever sees it.
- I'm gonna go as Wanda Childa.
- Amazing.
- Hell yeah.
So the deal is, people start arriving.
Jawbone's still setting up...
Jawbone is still setting up the ballot box
and getting the booth ready.
Everyone's gonna be able to vote here.
All you gotta do is get the votes
to the school, before midnight.
- I'm gonna stand next to the voting booth
and be constantly casting
Detect Magic as a ritual.
- [Brennan] Cool.
- So it takes 10 minutes
to cast, but it also lasts for 10 minutes,
so as I'm concentrating on it,
I'm casting it the next time.
- Everyone gets a glass of bad
baby milk once they've voted.
- Bad baby milk! Ragh shows up
and he's like, "Hoot, growl!
You're looking at a new
Bastion City Buccaneer!"
- Yes, b*tch!
- m*therf*ckers!
- [accented] Who the f*ck are you?
- He goes, "Okay, insane energy, yes."
- This is not Kristen's normal energy.
- Kristen goes to kiss him.
- I'm g*y! f*ck you!
- I'm sorry!
I'm straight, f*ck you!
- I Message Ragh and go,
it's too long to even begin to explain.
- She's just kinda white girl
twerking on the dance floor.
- Your shoulders are shaking,
your butt is completely still.
- Just so horizontal.
- Fabian's prioritization of
popularity this year alone,
holding the election at
Seacaster Manor, everybody,
everybody, everybody is here.
- Yes! Maximum legend.
- It was worth it.
- Maximum f*cking legend.
- It was all worth it.
These people have no
idea how much fried rice
is in my garage right now.
- In your garage?
- Well, I didn't have
time to throw it out!
I only have one trash can.
- Adaine.
- Yes?
- [Brennan] You are looking around.
- I cast Banishment on
Fabian's fried rice.
- Banishment on Fabian's fried rice. Cool.
- It is sentient, at this point.
- [Brennan] So, in
another part of the place,
Gorgug, I think you are looking around
at the Cloud Rider Engine.
The party's beginning to start.
- This is too easy. This is too easy.
Everyone's here? We're in a f*cking boat.
And they have maybe an airship thing?
- [Brennan] As they begin to confer,
a couple things happen simultaneously.
Party is bumpin'. Music is bumpin'.
Adaine, it's exactly as you've
seen it in your visions.
- Whoa. Maximum legend.
- So many times before.
- Happy birthday, Fabian.
- Until suddenly, it's not
like it was
in your visions,
because the skies are not clear.
- It's not supposed to rain today.
- A Sending spell arrives.
"You didn't see the storm coming?
Must not be a very good Oracle."
All throughout the house, you guys see,
from behind sofas and behind
dressers, behind other places,
ping-pong ba*ls.
- What?
- That have spells written on the inside?
- That have spells written
on the inside of them,
from all the shots Oisin missed
at the first party at Seacaster Manor.
Ping-pong ba*ls alight, lit with a rune,
and as they alight,
you hear a sudden lurching.
The winds kick up, and Fabian,
you look out at the neighborhood
of Downtown Elmville
and watch as the entire neighborhood
moves
suddenly down,
as all of Seacaster Manor
is lifted into the sky.
- My mom's gonna k*ll me!
- I'm going to need everybody
here to roll initiative.
And that's all for this
episode of "Dimension 20"!
Tune in next week, and
we'll see you at Basrar's.
- Everyone get out!
- A powerful enemy has wronged us today.
[Brennan squawks]
- Are you okay?
- No!
- Are you okay?
- No.
- Did you have a thing with Kristen Two?
- How do you think she got pregnant?
- I have to go. I'll be nearby.
- Mouth full of-
- But I have to go!
- There's too many dragons.
We gotta keep sh**ting
Grandma and gassing it.
- Fabian says we can all
use the cannons! Woo!
- Your illusion work with these dragons
is absolutely exceptional.
- Eugenia.
- Yes?
- Bard to rogue.
- Yes?
- It's all a f*cking lie.
[Brennan roaring]
- Gorgug! Don't f*cking
crash my parents' boat!
- Beautiful, majestic. Bam!
- Each of you see Fig and Gerard Neigh
vanish into the clouds below.
[Siobhan squawking]
- Maximum legend!
- Yes, this is all
going according to plan!
- Oh no, I did this.
- You did this!
- I did this!
- You did it!
- Get f*cking with it.
- I'm sorry, all right!
[Zac shouting]
[Brennan screaming]
If this is how this works,
I don't know that this
show will ever recover.
♪ T-T-T-Taking over, teenage rebellion ♪
♪ No more fantasizing about it ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ Hey, let's go ♪
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21x17 - The Name
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A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.
A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.