01x19 - The Legend of Lily

[bunniefuu]

There you are, folks.

You know what?
She held this very ring

right in that
pretty hand of hers.

- She did?
- Yeah.

"The toast of three
con-ti-nents..."

The toast of
three continents.

Now whatever
do they mean by that?

Well, nothing,
doesn't mean nothing.

They just put up
a lot of fancy stuff like that

to fool you.

But she sings a mighty
pretty song, that Lily.

Well, now
if she looks like this,

her voice
doesn't much matter.

But a lady, now that's
something else again.

Lily is a lady.
Everything a lady should be.

Oh, you talk like you're
not dry behind the ears yet.

Now once a man has seen
one of these indoor females,

he's seen 'em all.

I'll show you.

There.
You see?

You better start treating
Lily with respect.

Well, now the best way
to settle it, gents,

is to buy a couple of tickets
for the performance.

And that way
you'll both be ahead.

Now where do I get them?

No, wait a minute,
wait a minute.

Just how do those
words read again?

The toast of
three continents.

Are you sure that
they don't say the crust?

The crust?

[ men clamoring ]

Jonesy.

Yeah, it's me.

Come on, come on.

You wait till Slim and Jess
hear about this.

They'd pin your ears
back good.

Never mind that.

I'd do it again.
A hundred times if I were able.

Oh, nothing like
Lily Langford.

For looking at
and for listening to.

Did you ever hear her sing?

No.

Sweeter than
a bird knows how.

Well, if her singing can take
a nice, quiet fella like you,

and turn him into a wild man,
I don't want to hear it.

Nothing like that.

When Miss Lily sings,
it just makes a man grow weak,

feel mellow all over.

It's sort of magic-like.

You're best friends with
Miss Lily Langford, are you?

I had the distinct pleasure
of driving her carriage

in a triumphant precession
in Chicago.

Some years ago.

Well, now, I do declare,

I'd never taken you
for a celebrity, Jonesy.

For your information,
I didn't get this gold ring

in some penny arcade.

She gave it
to me, personally.

Yeah.

Alamo?

Yeah, boss.

How far do you
figure to Laramie now?

Oh, a couple of miles or three,
maybe right over ridge.

Well, that's good enough.
We'll make camp here

and hit the town the first thing
in the morning.

You're looking forward to it.

All the way.

You're just determined
not to be impressed, aren't you?

Oh, I'm impressed,
all right.

Matter of fact,
I'm so impressed...

I'm gonna
make an example of you.

You mean on account
of my acquaintance
with Miss Lily, huh?

On account of your street
brawlin' and rough neckin'.

This town's gonna
hold together

until your good friend
Miss Lily Langford
has come and gone.

Then I can point to you and say,
crime does not pay.

You mean you're going
to hold me here

all through her performance?

You got $5 bail money?

That's just what I thought.

Evening, sheriff.

Good evening.

I'm Ben Carson,
personal manager
for Miss Langford.

Well, tonight
is my night for celebrities.

What can I do
for you, sir?

Well, I thought
maybe this gentleman here

might need a friend.

I saw that little mix-up
out on the street.

Well, I hate to see
anyone in jail

because of an argument
over Lily.

That's exactly
what I jailed him for.

A man his age
ought to know better.

Sheriff, I think
you've made your point.

I'd like to stand his bail.

Uh, $5 worth?

Five dollars?

We'll just call it
a gesture of goodwill.

And I consider it
a bargain.

Not much.
Fair enough.

Was this open
all the time?

Much obliged to you,
Mr. Carson.

Forget it, it
was my pleasure.

Well, Mr. Carson.

Um, you know, it is customary
to pay $50 for extra deputies

the night of the performance.

Oh, yes, I know
it is, sheriff,

- and I'll be happy
to pay for it.
- Oh, fine.

The night
of the performance.

Guess Jonesy was right.

Looks like
Lily Langford is stirring up

a lot of action in town.

She must be some woman.

Up to now, I thought
Jonesy was making her up.

You coming with me?

Yeah.
Yeah, I'll be along.

Like what you see?

More or less.

I got a couple
of good tickets
for her performance.

Keep them.

Excuse me, for a minute

I thought I was
talking to a man.

I can see now
you're just a buffalo

strayed from your herd.

Mister, have you ever been
stomped on by a buffalo?

Oh, take it easy.
I was just joshing you.

No harm in that,
is there?

Well, you don't know how close
you came to finding out.

Good morning, Jess.

Hello, Charlie.

Trim or a full cut?

Give me whatever the rest
of the buffalo are having.

Yeah.

How's that?

Cut it some.

[ screaming ]

Think they had enough,
Alamo?

Well, the town folks have,
but I can't say
the same for the boys.

Shanghai Pierce, sheriff.

Pleased to meet you.

I get free of this, I'll spit

the whole lot of you
out of town.

Well, sheriff,
we just wanted to say

some howdy do.
Ain't that right, Alamo?

Yeah, this ain't Texas, boss.

The folks up here
just ain't so cordial-like.

Comes from being Yankees,
I guess.

Ease up on
the folks, Alamo.

They know we're
in town, all right.

Come on, boys.

Is it over yet?

Yeah.

Now that's the trouble
with working.

You miss a lot.

- So long.
- Bye.

Hey.

That's what I call a pancake
with real syrup on it.

Right purty.

Look at them
b*llet holes.

Now wouldn't I like to
lay my hands on the man
who did that?

I don't hold
with the destruction

of valuable property,
you know.

Let's go inside
and have a drink, boss.

No, I got to get prettied up.
You go on.

See that
our mavericks don't drink

the place dry
before I get there.

Okay, boss.

It's about time
you two showed up.

I'd better have deputized
a couple of prairie dogs.

Have a seat, mister,
be with you in a moment.

All right, friend.
Out.

Keep cutting, Charlie.

Come on, boy.
The girls will like you
just the way you are.

Now you don't want trouble,
do you?

Ah, look, please, I--

Look, mister,
all I want is a haircut.

It'll likely go a lot faster
if you sit down somewhere.

Shave.
Nice and smooth.

You had enough?

What was that
you were saying?

All right, which one of you
does his k*lling?

You're just liable
to find out.

You know who you've been
shoving around?

Yeah, a man
who can't wait his turn.

Shanghai
doesn't have to wait.

For nothing and nobody.

Well, he's still waiting
for his shave.

Boss, he's asking for it.

He's already
asked for it.

All right,
that will be far enough.

And I'll sh**t the first man
who keeps a g*n in his hand.

Come on, Jess.
Mount up.

It's time we're going.

I don't know
where you're going,

but you go there and hide
'cause if I ever see you again,

you'll likely wish
that I hadn't.

Put it away.

There aren't gonna be
any more threats now, Shanghai.

Any more trouble either.

If you want to stay
in one piece.

He was in the bar
not over 10 minutes ago

offering to buy a drink
for anyone within earshot.

I never thought
you could be bribed, sheriff.

Something happen
to change your mind?

Shanghai and his men are loose,
aren't they?

Let's get this straight,
Carson.

Shanghai has paid his fine,
he's paid his damages.

And he tells me him
and his whole crew

is gonna stay in line.

Now does that satisfy you?

No!

Shanghai and his roughnecks

could ruin Miss Langford's
performance.

You got some silly idea
that Shanghai trailed it

all the way up here just to see
Miss Lily's performance.

Well, why else
would they come here?

As far as I know,

Shanghai has no great interest
in Miss Lily.

He told me he was
trailing a card sharp.

Drugged
his drinks back in Dodge.

Cheated him blind.

Shanghai
is not the kind of a man

to take a trick like
that lying down.

Well, what are you
looking at me for?

I don't know.

But if I was
a card-playing man like you,

I'd-- I'd watch who
I sat into a game with

the next few days.

Oh, by the way,
you ever been to Dodge?

Just for once,
listen to what I'm telling you.

Well, I knew a fellow
who died with exactly

the kind of back trouble
you've got.

Now you better stick
to selling store goods, Judd.

I'll get my doctoring
done someplace else.

I was only trying to help.

We've been friends
a long time, Jonesy.

I guess I did get
my dander up a little.

Hadn't anything to do
with you though.

I've been trying to get
that Mr. Carson to show

my song to Miss Lily
when she comes to town.

That "Marry Me
in Laramie"?

Yeah, I thought maybe
she'd use it in her performance.

He didn't like the idea.

Wouldn't even let me
play it for him.

Ain't that him
over there?

Why don't you hit him
up again?

He don't seem busy,
unless you call
swatting flies busy.

Oh, it won't do any good.
I got lots to do.

Three more stops,
and I'm due back
at the ranch at sundown.

Hi, Mr. Carson.

Sort of looking things
over here, huh?

Yes.

You're doing a fine job
of remodeling.

First rate. Yes, sir.

Thanks, I thought maybe
you'd like to look inside now.

Why?

Well, we've almost
got the stage finished

and I figured you'd want
to look it over.

Oh.

Well, is there something
wrong, Mr. Carson?

Well, you're probably
very crowded in there

and I think maybe I better
come back

and look it over
when it's thinned out a little.

Only a table
or two of poker,

it's hardly
what you call crowded.

Just a table or two?

Uh-huh. Some of
Shanghai Pierce's crowd.

But the way
they're guzzling their whiskey,

I got an idea
they won't be here very long.

Is Mr. Pierce with them?

No.

Oh, I haven't seen him
around all day.

Well, after last night,
like as not,

he's still sleeping.

Well, maybe I will have
a look inside at that.

Well, Mr. Carson,
how does she look to you, huh?

It's your call, Alamo.
That is if you're going to.

Call.

I got queens.

Beats me.

Ain't that a hand for you?

- Jack high.
- Yeah, jack high.

Looks like he beat you.

He beat me.

Go on, deal, big winner.

All right,
don't get sore about it.

It's the first pot
you've lost all day.

I said, deal.

I wish you'd take a look
at the front of the stage,
Mr. Carson.

We're not sure
about the lights.

A little bit later.
You gents mind if I sit in?

No, no, grab a chair.

Well...

Your bet.

I don't see you crowding
for front.

You opened.

Oh.

You're pretty smart,
aren't you?

You give a man a little luck,
and you can use
shellac for brains.

There.

I'll take one card.

Okay.

And I'll stand pat.

That's your bet?

It is if you're man
enough to call it.

Sorry, four jacks.

Wait a minute.

There's a jack in those
discards, I saw it.

I played the cards
you dealt me.

I dealt you no four jacks.

Well, how else
would I get them?

By cheating.

You ain't been
running on luck.

You've been cheating me
blind the whole game.

Now wait a minute.

I'll leave it to any of
these gentlemen here.

You're gonna
leave it to me!

And I call him
a lousy cheat.

Hey, Jonesy, wait.

I'd like to, Mr. Carson,
but I can't.

Got to get back
to the ranch before dark.

I'll go with you.

I want to talk to you
about that song.

Oh.

You ran after me about that;
well, I'm much obliged to you.

Well, let's get going.

When you write
my biography, Bea,

be sure to make a note
of the fact

that I was a trail blazer.

I'm sure I've swallowed
enough dust to prove it.

Sure.

The last tour triumphant,
downhill all the way.

Oh, all right.

So it isn't the court
of St. James anymore.

I can't complain.

Not after all those
wonderful years at the top.

And what now?

Horny-handed cowboys,
full of whiskey

waiting for you
at the bottom.

What a finale.

I agreed to the tour, Bea.

I've never walked out
on a contract yet.

You haven't walked out
on anything or anyone.

God love you.

That's your trouble.

Oh, come now.

What about
some of the other things?

People, the friendships,
there have been some...

some mighty good ones, Bea.

Maybe there will be
some good ones

on the way down
the ladder too.

I won't know
if I run out on them.

Maybe if you just run out
on one of them.

Ben, for instance,
and don't tell me

you're still in love
with him.

That has nothing to do
with it.

I don't want to hurt him.

No matter what else he is,
he's still my husband.

There's just one way
to hurt him.

For you to stop earning money
for him to gamble away.

The day I can't earn money,

Ben will leave me.

I know that.

But I can't stop trying.

I don't have to tell you
how many people I owe money.

You had the list.

I'm not worried
about that.

Well, I am.

Lily Langford's not going out
owing anybody.

[ g*nshots ]

Hey, this is no social call
they're paying.

Jim! Jim,
we have to go faster!

Ha! Yeah!
Ya!

Why would
anyone come after us?

Maybe they saw
the last show.

Faster, Jim.
Faster!

Do something, Jim!
Fire back at them!

Anything!

Well, at least that's over.
Now dying won't be so bad.

Well, somebody
is going to pay for this.

Quite a performance.

Who are you and what
do you think you're doing here?

Just happen to be the
Sheriff of Platte County is all.

You and me have
got a little settling up to do.

We've got
a lot of settling up to do.

What's the idea
chasing us?

Firing on two women?

We weren't trying to sh**t you,
just trying to stop you is all.

You're running out on
a pretty fair size livery bill

and it's my job
to collect it.

My husband paid
that bill before he left.

Not according
to this, he didn't.

It says here, care
and feeding the horses, $18.36,

repair of the stage coach,
comes to $58.36.

You want to take
a look at it?

I gave him the money.
He must have paid it.

Do you understand Miss Langford
thought this bill was paid.

She doesn't run out
on her debts ever.

I'd like to take
your word for it but afraid

I'm gonna have to have
the money instead.

These three deputies
riding out here with me

is gonna add $25
more for collection fee.

But we haven't
that much money.

When we're traveling,
she means.

I'm sorry.

You're not making it
any easier for me.

Look, we're on our way
to Laramie

and we'll mail you a check.

Oh, no.

It's got to be paid
right here and now.

But...

Oh, Lily, no.

It's-- It's worth far more than
the livery bill.

You're sure you haven't
got any money?

I'd rather
settle it like that.

No, I'm sorry,
we just don't have it with us.

Please,
take it and let us go.

Well, all right.

If that's the way
you want it, miss.

I think I can make it work.

Well, have a nice trip.

How I wish I had my hands
on your husband right now.

h*! h*.

What's wrong, Jim?

We can't risk that front
wheel no longer, ma'am.

We'll have to put up
here to fix it.

What's here?

It's a repair shop.

But we'll still make
Laramie in time.

Well, here, help me out,
let me get a look at that wheel.

You can see for yourself,
ma'am, it just ain't safe.

The wood won't
take the pounding,
now the rim's gone.

I just
don't understand.

I do.

Four new wheels
Ben didn't get.

Like the livery bill
he didn't pay.

This is a new low,
even for him.

There ain't no new wheels
on this coach, ma'am.

I'll guarantee you that.

Well, you better go on over
and make whatever

arrangements are necessary
for our staying, please.

Yes, ma'am.

Uh, when Ben pawned
your watch,

it was for the new
coach wheels, wasn't it?

That's what
I thought.

Evidently, Ben had
a stack of poker chips

on his mind instead.

You know, I have
the strangest feeling,

I am about to commit m*rder
on your husband.

Oh, Bea.

Don't you understand?

Ben can't help what he is.

And he can't change.

Any more than I can.

Bea, do you remember
what they said to me

the night I won
the Sarah Siddons award?

I'll never forget.

I saved the clippings.

"To a great young star,
full of music and fire."

Well, the star
isn't young anymore.

And the music and the fire
has gotten lost

somewhere between the balcony
and the first row.

You're still beautiful, Lily.

And I think you get
nicer with every year.

Thanks.

You keep thinking that.

It ain't hard.

Well, it might be,
walking to Laramie.

♪ Marry me, marry me
way out in Laramie ♪

♪ Where the wild
sycamores grow ♪

♪ We'll raise us a young 'un
to tend to my tack ♪

♪ And a girl to help you sew ♪

♪ Say that you
love me some night ♪

♪ When above me
a Wyoming moon is aglow ♪

♪ I'm no Casanova,
don't sing much in tune ♪

♪ But darlin',
I love to spoon ♪

♪ So marry me
in Laramie soon ♪

What do you think of that?

Oh, fine.

Fine little tune.

Would you speak
to Miss Lily about singing it

while she's here?

Oh, sure, I'll speak
to Miss Lily, first thing.

Won't I bust
just wide open.

Miss Lily Langford,

singing my song
in front of everybody.

That hasn't happened yet,
Jonesy.

- We got chores to do.
- How's that?

Well, I'll help you
clean off the table.

Then we'll go outside
and clean things up, huh?

You see what it's like
working on a ranch?

Just chokes a man's
talent right off.

You like cards?

Yeah, I play a little
poker now and then.

Me too,
every chance I get.

Care to try a hand?

Why not?

I could use
some extra change.

One thing's sure,
somebody always wins.

Mind if we play
with these?

Oh, not at all.

Cut for deal.

How many?

One.

Dealer takes two.

I'm getting a headache.

I'm sorry.

Wish there was something
I could do.

There is.

You can stop playing
poker with me.

What's the matter with him?

I don't know.

He never was a bad loser.

You don't get him out of here,
I'm gonna tear his head off.

What's the matter?
He's been cheating you?

Every way there is.

I know he's been
running in bad luck,
I'm sorry about it.

I've got a horse
out in the barn.

You're welcome to ride it
back to Laramie.

What kind of talk
is this, Slim?

Mr. Carson is our guest.

Well, it is
getting late and...

It's getting
real late.

[ horses approaching ]

Looks like Shanghai Pierce
and his men.

Oh-oh.

If they see us, we won't have
a ranch left standing.

Maybe I could send
them on their way.

They've never seen me.

No, you better not,
Jonesy.

I can handle it.

Evening, folks.

Did you get lost
in the dark?

I don't think so,
mister.

We're trailing a no-good
card slick, city fella.

Very good at cheating.

Reckon I'm not your man.

You could have seen him,
he caught a ride this way.

Didn't stop here.

This is where
the trail stops, Shanghai.

They must be here.

Tracks?

Wagon tracks.

We're trailing them.

The wagon's over
by the barn.

Well, there are
a lot of wagons--

You better loosen up, mister,
before we run out of talk.

Do you see what I see?

Well, it's almost too good
for my eyes.

ALAMO: I count this
one of my lucky nights,

getting a chance to settle up
with you two.

Boss, why don't you
just start firing,

we'll kind of
join in with you.

[ laughter ]

[ wagon approaching ]

Why, it's Miss Lily.

h*!

How far is it
to Laramie?

Twelve miles.

Do you hear that, ma'am?

Another 12 miles.

Wait a minute now.

Hold it, driver.

You're not going to be
in a hurry, ma'am.

Please, we're very tired,
we've been traveling a long way.

Now how am I gonna know
that you're Miss Lily Langford,

with that thingamajig
tied around your face?

You're just going to have
to take my word for it.

And supposing I don't?

Well, then I suppose
I'll have to sh**t you.

That's the custom, isn't it?

Sure is.

I'll tell you what, ma'am.

Laramie is liable to be
a little hard to find at night.

Every now and then some
gopher crawls out of his hole

and swallows it.

I'd count it a privilege

if you allowed me
to lead you in.

Well, I'd like
that very much, mister...

Shanghai Pierce, ma'am.

At your service
as the saying goes.

Thank you.

We're moving, Alamo.

What about them?

Man, I got better things to do.

Getting into a fight's easy.

I can do that anytime.

I got some business
with our card-stealing friend.

Looks like
you're a little late.

Now wait. Ow!

What are you
trying to do?

Earmark me
like a yearling?

No. I said, quiet.

Yeah.

Looking pretty good now.

Even considering the material
I got to work with,

you're almost gonna
look like a gentlemen.

There we are.

How's that feel?

Terrible.

What in the name...

Bea.

Sorry, Lily.

It just flew out of my hand.

Well, might as well face it.

I'm just not supposed
to sleep in this town.

How about some coffee?

No, no, thanks.

I'm sorry about the blind
but it wasn't me

who you kept you
awake the night long,

it was your friend
Shanghai.

The door did take quite
a battering, didn't it?

Never knew a man with so much
persistence and strength.

Maybe you should have
let him in.

Would have got more sleep.

I'd like to blame someone.

Deep down, I'm afraid
I'm the only one at fault.

I'm scared, Bea.

So scared I'd like to run.

You're tired,
that's all, honey.

You get
a good sleep today

and you'll knock them
cold tonight.

And you keep telling me
that in case I forget, will you?

[ band music playing ]

Oh, now what?

Still think you're gonna
get any sleep?

I'm gonna try.

Whoa. Oh, boy.

Jonesy, why don't you
just forget about it?

And leave a slur
on her name?

I'll do no such thing.

Now what Ben Carson does
isn't her fault.

Slim's right,
forget about it.

But Lily's a fine lady.

She wouldn't stand for somebody
representing her who's a cheat.

Taking your money
the way he did.

I'm gonna go tell her.

It wasn't
much money, Jonesy.

No need to make a fuss.

I'll see you
at the theater.

Hello, boys.

You won't be needing these,
not for tonight anyway.

Is Shanghai in town?

I'd sooner go
without my boots.

Shanghai, Alamo,
they've all agreed

to simmer down
for the evening.

Does that simmering
down include them

turning in their g*ns?

That's right.

We're covering
every entrance to town.

Nobody rides in
with hardware on.

Now just turn them
over to me.

Be in my office, you can
pick them up in the morning.

Yeah, along
with the Sunday paper.

BEN: Now, Lily, don't pull
that innocent act on me.

LILY: It's no act, Ben.

This is the lowest trick
you've ever pulled.

Even worse than running out
on me in Dodge City.

And what's wrong with money?

You never had any trouble
spending it before.

I always had lots of help.

Oh, Lily.

Look, we could slip out through
that crowd down there

and no one would ever know
the difference.

Except for the people who bought
those tickets, you mean.

Not to mention the bills
you haven't paid.

That's their money, Ben.

But, Lily,
it's a big chunk.

It's more money
than either one of us

have seen in a long time.

We could be miles away
before they found out.

That's as far as
you can see, is it?

Running out
doesn't concern you.

Cheating an audience
doesn't bother you.

Cheating an audience?

Well, what do you think
you've been doing

the last few years?

Why, just standing up in front
of them the way you look now

is cheating them pretty good.

That's a lie.

I never left a theater
in my life

where there wasn't applause.

All right.

Maybe it isn't
what it used to be,

but I haven't
cheated them yet.

Oh, Lily.

Why don't you run out
with me now?

Quit while you're ahead.

Not with you, Ben.

I'm not running, walking,
anything with you.

But the show is over, Lily.

No more admirers,
no more hangers-on,

your name isn't
in lights anymore.

This is cold
turkey night in Dixie

and I'm all
you've got left.

Then I'd rather be alone.

Leave her be, Mr. Carson.

And don't you ever
lay a hand to her again.

I forgot, Lily, there is
just one more crumb left.

Get him to tell you about
that ring he's wearing,

you'll die laughing.

Will you get out, Ben?

See how special
you are, Jonesy.

She hands them out
right and left to
hayseeds like you.

Just coming
to fetch you, Carson.

Well, I have to get
to the theater, sheriff.

I know,
I'm taking you over.

Saloon keeper is
a little concerned

about ticket money
being missing.

I'm--
I'm sorry about the ring.

There's no reason
why you should believe me

but I haven't given
one away for a long time.

It doesn't matter.

Yes, it does.

All these things matter.

I'm just beginning
to know how much.

Where did
I give it to you?

Chicago.

It'd be nice
if I could say I remember...

but I don't.

I remember
and that's enough.

Oh, excuse me.

You coming
to the performance tonight?

Oh, yes,
I'm counting on it.

Look at me.

I am.

No.

No, really look.

Do you see anything there
you remember?

Anything worth coming
to see tonight?

You are a beautiful woman,
Miss Lily.

Then your eyesight's

not as good
as it was in Chicago.

Might be you should look out
more at other folks

rather than
just looking at yourself.

You're right, Jonesy.

But when I do look out,

I see audiences
who expect someone

young, talented,
full of fire, music.

I don't qualify anymore.

After tonight,
I'm not even gonna try.

But there's still tonight

and you're still
a beautiful woman.

Only some of that beauty
is on the inside now.

And that's not such a bad place
for a little bit of it to be.

Thank you, Jonesy.

Thank you.

I'm proud of it.

Good night.

Good night.

[ indistinct chatter ]

[ whistling and cheering ]

♪ I wandered today
to the hills, Maggie ♪

♪ To watch the scene below ♪

Sing it, Lily,
don't crow it.

[ laughter ]

♪ As we used to long,
long ago ♪

♪ The green growth is gone
from the hills, Maggie ♪

You ain't no Lily,
you got to be her mother.

Keep singing, Miss Lily.
Make believers out of them.

♪ The creek and the creaking
old mill, Maggie ♪

I see better entertainment
in the flea circus.

You and that piano player.
You're two of a kind.

Why didn't they tell us

you came over on
the Mayflower?

All right.

That's enough.

Now you turn around

and let me get
a good look at you.

Are you the one
talking about being old?

Looking at you,
it sure comes to mind, lady.

I can see why you couldn't
stand looking at yourself much.

But if that grizzled hide

you're wearing
for a face isn't old,

you must be
mighty sick with something.

Never mind about me, lady.

I have to.

You standing up here bellowing
in front of everybody,

we all have to
worry about you,

whether we want to or not.

You tell him, lady,
stand right up to him.

You're prettier than he is.

- Why don't you sing?
- Yeah.

I don't ordinarily hit
womenfolk but...

I don't suppose a man your age
would have the strength.

Sit down, Shanghai!

Someone shut him up.

You're all right, Lily.

[ whistling ]

[ indistinct chatter ]

♪ It's tough ♪

♪ When you're no longer young,
Shanghai ♪

♪ And you should know
that best ♪

♪ And long before my songs
are sung, Shanghai ♪

♪ They will lay you out
to rest ♪

[ laughter ]

[ applause ]

Miss Lily, they're gettin'
mighty restless.

Better try to hold 'em.

But how?

This might do it
if we're lucky.

[ begins singing
"Dixie" ]

♪ In Dixie land
where I was born ♪

♪ Early on
one frosty morn ♪

Sit down, Shanghai,
sit down.

[ continues singing
"Dixie" ]

Hold it, hold it.

I got something to say.

I think you've said
more than enough already.

I know, I got it
coming to me.

How did you get out of jail?
k*lled the sheriff?

Well, I did what any old
gray-haired horse would do.

I paid my fine,

bought a new saloon
for the bar keep.

If I got any nicer, they'd want
me to stay on as town parson.

I never was one
to hold a grudge.

Where are you heading,
Shanghai?

Wherever you're going.

I brought you in here
with an escort,

and I'd like to see you safely
to wherever you're bound.

Well, now.

No self-respecting woman
could refuse such gallantry.

Just one thing, Miss Lily.

What's that?

Make it a long trip,
will you?

Come on, boys.

Help! Help!

[ laughing ]