Tales from the Hood 2 (2018)

[bunniefuu]

- Mr. Simms?
- Yes.

Mr. Beach is this way.

And I think
on the next model,

the g*ns
should be even bigger.

Yeah. Again, sir, these are
not your standard g*ns.

- These are lasers.
- I like bigger.

People like bigger.

Yes, but what-what I'm
trying to explain to you...

Bigger!

Mr. Beach?

I'm busy.

I'm busy, Kelly, explaining
to Grant the importance of big.

You know, on second thought,
why don't you explain it?

I mean as a woman, you
certainly have a firm grasp

on why big is preferred.

Sir, Mr. Diomedes Simms is here.

He... You're not
what I was expecting.

I assure you, sir, no one
tells stories as well as I.

Oh, yes. Yes, yes.

Your kind are particularly
accomplished liars, aren't they?

Oh?

You know about my kind?

Oh, Mr. Simms, my prisons
are filled with your kind.

Surely not because
of any issues

with an unjust application
of "just-us."

Look, I'm the largest
builder and owner

of private prisons
in this country,

and I can tell you
your brothers and sisters

make up an enormous part
of my profits.

- Hmm.
- Hmm.

Kelly, how long until
that press conference?

Uh, just a couple
of hours, sir.

sh*t.

sh*t.

Excuse me?

Nothing.

You've got ten minutes
to impress me.

Grant, explain to Simms
why he's here.

Yes. Uh, right away.

Uh, sir, we are in the last
stage before full production

of what I can
only refer to as...

a sentient robot.

The Robo-Patriot,
the future of American Security.

A robot police force?

That I own and control.

- You ever hear of AI?
- Mm.

That's Artificial Intelligence.

Oh, I see artificial
intelligence all the time.

Mm.

- Well, I call it...
- I call it. I, Grant.

I call it.

- Mr. Beach calls it...
- Yeah.

RI,
Real Intelligence.

You see, because it can learn
from first-hand experience,

but like a person, it can also
learn from second-hand experience,

so stories, fables, tales.

- That's where you come in.
- Hmm.

That's right.

You're here
to tell it tales

so that it has
an even broader base

from which to assess who is worthy of
detention, jail, even-even execution.

Execution?

Well, that sounds
so final

and not nearly as lucrative
as indefinite incarceration.

Some things I do are just
because it's the right thing.

Indeed.

Indeed.

But let's hear
one of those stories

that I'm supposed to be willing
to write you a check for.

Great. Uh, we're already linked
into the robot and recording, sir.

Let's see. Something to
make your creation choose

the correct individual
for incarceration.

- Yes.
- Well, there are so many possibilities.

Give me a theme.

Well, let's pull one
from the headlines.

Now, since I already
have so many black lives

filling the beds
of my facilities,

how about
Black Lives Matter?

Of course.
Of course.

Now this is the story
of criminal behavior,

and how one particular
black life mattered.

I call it...
"Good Golly."

What?
What is he talking about?

Oh, my gosh.

Where are we goin'?

This is it! Zoe!

Zoe, look!
This is it!

Your stupid brother
is still hiking.

It's like we're not
on the same vacation.

Oh, come on. We will
catch up with him later.

Let's go.

Can you believe I found it?
Ready?

I don't like the
looks of this place.

Oh, it'll be fun!
Come on.

Huh.

"No bad idea ever dies.

It only lies dormant until the
pungent rains of the demon spring."

Wait!

"God bless this hell?"

Jesus, do we really
have to do this?

It's cool!
God blessed it.

Okay, this is crazy.

Not as crazy as that!

Zoe, look!

No, that is insane.

Huh.

"co*n Chicken Inn."

Okay, so this is the door
that people came in through

when they wanted
some chicken.

The Colonel's chicken made
you wanna lick your fingers,

but that guy was licking you.

Mmm? Mmm?

And this?
This is like, what?

You find that amusing?

Uh, well, yeah,
actually.

I mean, who looks like that?

Who indeed.

sl*ve masters used to brand
their property with a hot iron,

but as we became free
men and women,

America needed a new way
to mark its property,

a new way to control the n*gro,
keep him in his place.

So instead of
hot coals and metal,

they used pen, paint, and ink.

No branding iron necessary.

Come this way.

Lazy, shiftless,

gluttonous, lying,

over-sexed, ugly,

violent, stupid.

And this way,
the American n*gg*r/n*gro

became the first true
corporate brand.

Yeah, this country used to
be just really messed up.

No doubt.

Better now, is it?

Well, I mean,
we're friends, so...

Since
grade school, so...

Yeah!

Tsss!

Yeah.

- Mmm.
- We should go.

- Uh, do you have any gollys?
- Gollys?

Yeah, like...

this?

Hey!

Careful!

I was just leaning
against a chair.

Yeah, Zoe.
Careful.

That chair's made from the
sacred wood of a sl*ve ship.

The grain is a product
of the bloodshed

by men and women
who were beaten and died

chained within its bowels as
it traversed the Middle Passage.

Mm.

That was like
the black holocaust.

And, duh!

The entire American sl*ve
experience was a holocaust,

which, I might add,
continues today.

Its dark repercussions
keep bearing fruit.

Can we please go?

About the gollys,

the golliwogs, um, I heard
you had golliwogs for sale?

This is a museum.
Nothing is for sale!

Oh, but...

Oh, he looks
just like my first.

Hi, Golly.

My little Golly Gee.

How about 800?

Others have offered thousands,
and I tell them all the same...

No. This doll, in particular,
has been through too much.

It's carried over 100 years of
racism in its small, delicate frame,

a racism created in America

that's traveled to England,
Australia and beyond.

Okay, well, my great gran had a collection,
and she started me collecting,

so, honestly, I don't
really see it as r*cist.

Just a warm, comforting
part of my childhood.

Mammy sl*ves also gave white children
comfort in their childhoods,

cradling them, feeding them
from their swollen, bruised t*ts

as their own babies were sold,
r*ped, or otherwise neglected.

As comforting as they were,

I don't think you should have
a mammy to play with either.

For God sakes, it's a doll.

It's a tool, an instrument
of manipulation

that kills the spirit
of who we really are

by presenting the lie
others wish to see.

Is being your comfort any better
than being your sl*ve?

Or are they the same?

Okay, seriously!
This is just ridiculous.

Black rappers call themselves
n*gg*r all the time,

and I can't even have
a cute, little black doll?

Your friend's whiteness is showing.

W-Well, she's kind
of right, isn't she?

No. That doll is the reason many black men
and women still call themselves n*gg*r*s.

They, too,
have accepted the branding.

Marshall McLuhan was right.

"The medium is the message,"
and the message has taken hold.

This poor, misshapen creature

was given life
by a white English woman

and nurtured on the tit
of racism,

a foul aberration
that refuses to die,

as new generations resuscitate
its tortured soul.

Trust me. This doll
will bring no comfort.

It's filled with all the pain and
torment 100 years of hate can produce.

It may give you what you want,
but not how you want it.

Good day, ladies.

Let's go.

So, this is where-where
the doll is?

I can't believe
you talked me into this.

Oh, come on. You hated that
old guy even more than I did.

So, can you
get us in?

You're kidding me.

Locks from old buildings
like this

are practically
from the stone ages.

Well, go do your thing.

Done.

Piece of cake.

- God, your brother is such a felon.
- Yeah, I know.

You weren't complaining last night when
I "fell in" to your "you-know-what."

Shut up, nasty.

Mm! I'm comin'
for that a*s, girl.

I'm gonna grab it.
I want to get it, girl.

I see it bouncin'.
Come here. Come here!

Don't.

What...
is all this stuff?

Basically a museum
of f*cked-up history.

Yeah.

Oh, cool.

What?

It's a-a whippin' post.

- You know, like where if, uh, if I was your "masta"?
- Mm.

I'd tie up and punish
your pretty black a*s

for not obeying my every perverted white man desire.

Aw.

I'm so scared, Big Daddy.

Hi there, Golly Gee.

Oh, are you tired
of being locked in there?

Let me get you out.

Okay, um,
how do I get you out?

Guess I'll just have to bring this
whole thing back to the hotel with me

and get you
out of this backwards town.

Better turn around, girl.

I'm gonna
warm them cheeks up,

and then I'm gonna
storm them cheeks.

You're so nasty, Daddy!

Okay, ew! You guys, I do not want
to hear your sicko sex talk.

Uh, you f*cked
my brother first.

Yeah, and-and we had to listen
to how he used to call you

- his "snow-white h*."
- What?

Disgusting. My brother was
your nasty black golliwog.

Whatever!

Yeah, it looks like
payback is my b*tch.

Oh!

sh*t. Come on!

Get it off me!

- Are you okay?
- You okay?

Help me, please.

Uh! Oh!

Guys!

It's not like you're gonna
need the glass anyway.

It's probably a good thing we broke
some stuff or stealed some other stuff.

Otherwise, it's gonna be
pretty obvious who stole it

if the only thing missing
is that stupid doll!

He is not stupid!
He is a cuddly cutie.

Isn't that right, Golly Gee?

- Oh, my gosh.
- Golly?

Hey, look at this.

Golly?

The Three Little Gollies.

Oh. Let me see.

Where are you,
Golly?

"One time,

three adventurous golliwogs...
Golly, Woggie, and n*gg*r...

chose to go for a walk
to Bumble Bee Lane.

Golly wasn't ready, so Woggie and n*gg*r
decided they would begin without him,

- allowing Golly to catch up as soon as he could."
- Golly?

"So off went Woggie and
n*gg*r, arm-in-arm,

spiritedly singing
their favorite song,

which you may have guessed
was ‘Ten Little n*gg*r Boys.'"

- That's kinda r*cist, huh?
- Yeah.

Golly?

Look at this.

Golliwog Goes to Hell.

- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

Oh, hold on.
Wait.

"A nig,

a nog,
uh, wake up Golliwog.

Make some golly fun and 'den
go right back to sleep again."

That's it?

Yeah. The rest of the
pages are just blank.

What?

There you are, Golly!

Hi. Aw.

- Audrey? You're bleeding.
- Hmm?

Did you get
cut from the glass?

I-I don't think so.

It's the doll.

- It's the doll!
- What? What?

Uh!

Oh...

Run!

No!

Stop. No.

Stop.

There's no need
for that, Golly Gee.

Don't you know that you
were always my favorite?

It...

Hey, don't you know
that I love you?

Can't you just love me?

Can't we just
love each other?

Huh?

Mmm.

Childbirth is often
a joyous occasion.

No. No.

But I don't believe you're gonna
make it through this pregnancy.

Oh, what do we have here?

You're ready to pop.

I promise I'll bury you next to
your brother and your friend.

I don't care if I die,
but for the sake of the baby,

I should give birth
in a hospital.

Sorry, you can't leave.
How could I ever explain this?

Good-bye, Audrey.

It's time for you to bear
the fruit of your passion.

I love you, my gollies.

Oh, baby.

f*ck' white women
and havin' babies.

But how dare they
call you a stereotype.

You're just the creation
they designed you to be.

The tale has been
successfully stored in the Patriot's memory.

Well, Mr. Simms,
entertaining,

and I guess she got
what was coming to her.

Yes, the offspring
of evil intent

will always find fertile ground
to bear its bitter fruit.

That was a good story, Simms.

And yes, yes, yes, yes,
the doll got stolen,

but do you have anything
more to the point

from a-a criminal standpoint?

How about a story
about gangsters?

Gangsters, yes!

Now, that's something

the Robo-Patriot could go
after to protect America

and fill my prisons.

Well, this story begins...

as many tales
in the hood do...

with a violent beat down.

I don't know
what you talkin' about.

Whoo! g*dd*mn!

Hey, you see the sweat fly off his head?

Now, see, that's some ol' George Foreman
Thrilla-In-Manila sh*t right there!

Nah, that's
Rumble-In-The-Jungle, Booze.

Ali kicked Frazier's a*s
in Manila, like this!

Hoo!

g*dd*mn.
"Down goes Frazier!

The Champ is down!
The Champ is out!

Only four minutes left
in the fight!

How do you feel, Champ?"

Is what he said,
ladies and gentlemen!

"Mike Tyson
has been knocked out!"

"Cliff Bettis, super-pimp,
the Heidi Fleiss of the hood!"

"You don't look pretty now, you
sorry h*-running m*therf*cker!"

Now, Cliff,
I know you want to prove

that you got some
big-a*s brass ba*ls.

I know. And I know you don't
want to get punked out,

but these fools havin' too much fun
f*ck' you the f*ck up, playa.

Believe that!

Why don't you just go ahead...
No, look at me.

Go ahead on.

Tell us where you got
that $5 million hid at,

so while ya still got
some face left to lose, man.

Now, don't try
and deny it no more.

I'm way harder to fool than
the IRS, boy, and I know...

I know where you got
all these fancy-a*s cars from.

Listen to me.
That money is for my foundation.

Hm. Foundation.

Whatcha building?

I'm not a pimp anymore.

I gave all that up.

I had what you call...
a revelation.

This n*gga
had an "e-pimp-phany."

Man, that n*gg*r lyin'!

I'm a legitimate
businessman now.

I got
seven full franchises,

three car washes,
and one supermarket,

all creating jobs
in the community.

Come on, man.

We got so many people
trying to keep us down,

we need to be lifting
each other up right now

so the next generation
don't have to live like this.

We gotta stop with this k*lling
each other in the streets, man.

That money that you're trying to take
is for my charitable foundation.

We're gonna open
two magnet schools

and give scholarships to poor black kids
so they can get up out of this hellhole.

Damn. Damn, sh*t.
I ain't know that.

S-So...

So, you're trying to
give back to the community

and-and change lives and sh*t.

Like turn all that dirt
you done into good deeds.

Exactly.

We all could do some good work.

I don't give a f*ck about none of
that bleedin' heart bullshit, n*gga!

I'm in this world
to get mine.

f*ck your
United n*gg*r College Fund,

and f*ck them kids!

They want to make some real
money, send 'em to me.

Have 'em selling dope on the street
and make all the money they need.

sh**t. Start talkin'
or finish dyin', n*gga.

Come on, come on,
come on, come on.

There you go.
There you go.

Okay. Okay.

He said okay.

Okay. Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Now, that's smart.

I knew we'd eventually beat
some sense into your a*s.

Now, go on and tell me

where you got your little
secret cash stash hid at.

You know that sorry-a*s h*-house
I used to run over on Seventh?

Yeah.

On the top floor,
way in the back,

I got the nastiest crack h*
in the city.

No pride at all.

Do anything to anybody.

Rumor is animal control
uses her blood

to put down rabid dogs.

So what about her?

That's your mama!

I hid the money in her snatch.

That's a funny m*therf*cker
right there.

Yeah, n*gga?
Yeah, n*gga?

In her f*ck' snatch, huh?
You ain't sayin' nothin', b*tch!

- I'll bet you gonna do nothin'.
- f*ck' chill, b*tch!

Chill! Chill!

Man, get off me!

Chill, bro.

n*gga,
'dat sh*t was funny!

Are you telling me this fool f*ck'
around with a regular lady now?

Yep. A singer name
Sandra Blake.

What kinda pimp falls in love with
a b*tch that ain't even a h*?

You know where she be at?

Oh, yeah, she be at the
club down the street.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

What she look like?

Bro, she bad
as f*ck, man.

So we take that b*tch and run, you think this
n*gga gonna f*ck' start talkin' or what?

Yo, he got to talk. He-He
in love with her, man.

Pimp in love.

Now, what you go
and do that for?

That wasn't smart.
That wasn't smart.

You know
that n*gga crazy.

Boy, you crazy.

n*gga, you, uh...

n*gga, what the f*ck's so funny?

What the f*ck
you laughin' at?

Oh, I was just thinkin'...

how you real tough... now.

Real bad dude.

But heard you wasn't so hard
when you was up in Quentin.

Heard Bobby Sanchez was digging
up in your a*s on the regular.

b*tch-n*gga.

What...?

Nah, nah, nah, nah.

Booze, you
ignorant-a*s motherfucka!

What you hit him
that hard for?

Look, man, he was
talkin' sh*t, a'ight?

Look, f*ck his punk a*s!

f*ck his punk a*s?

How we gonna find where the
money at now, huh, Booze?

He the only one
that knew where it was!

What now?

- What now?
- Look, I don't know!

f*ck!

Go.

Take this fool and you dump this n*gga
body somewhere nobody'll find it.

Think you could do that
without f*ck' up?

That something
you could handle?

Good afternoon, everybody.

I want to thank you all
for being so patient.

We're running just a few
minutes behind right now,

but Mr. Lloyd will be out
very shortly, okay?

So, since when
do you believe in psychics?

He's on television.

Oh, oh, okay.

So he must be real.

Well, of course.
He's on television.

- Oh.
- He's very compelling.

Oh, good. Hmm, I'm sure
he'll help you a lot.

Well, you know, there were
so many things left unsaid

between Frank and I,
and I just...

I just want Frank to tell me
if he was always faithful.

Are you sure you'd really
wanna know all that, Susan?

Oh, that's horrible.

No, I'm not trying to be ugly,
but, uh, you know,

this is all about Dallas,
isn't it?

You see, I can't talk
to you about anything.

You don't like to talk about anything.
Why don't you go to therapy?

That is not making me
feel any better.

I'm not...
Okay, I'm sorry.

Let's do it to it, people,

because concentration
is information,

and information
is the key to success.

Whoa! h*-h*! Whoa.

I just had an intense vision.

If I don't get good notes today,

I see a bunch of people on
the unemployment line tomorrow.

You don't like this job...
Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah...

Too damn bad.

You should have been born
with talent like me.

- Got that, Larry?
- Yes, sir.

- What an as*h*le.
- d*ck.

And coming
to the stage, John Lloyd!

You better not fret.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I got something to tell you
you're not gonna like,

‘cause all of us
are gonna die.

But there's no reason
to be afraid.

Mm-mmm. Because this
life is just a practice

for a better life
that's yet to come.

I've been given a gift

so that I may share
that gift with you.

We have, in our studio
audience today, a woman...

named... Susan.

And...
she had a husband...

named...

- Frank.
- Oh! Oh, that's me!

Well, c-come on down!
Come on down.

Susan,
Susan, welcome.

- Welcome to the show, Susan.
- Thank you.

- You seem a little nervous here.
- I feel very nervous.

Uh, well, let's give Susan a big
hand, make her feel at home.

Okay.
Now, Susan,

- Susan, you were married to Frank?
- Mm-hmm.

You lost Frank?

Mm-hmm.

- You loved him very, very much.
- Mm-hmm.

You miss him
very, very much.

- Mm.
- Yes.

Well, I have news
for you, Susan.

- We're gonna talk to Frank today.
- Oh.

- But I need your help, okay?
- Okay.

All right.
So, now, I want you to think...

think about Frank,
everything about Frank.

How he looked,
how he sounded,

what he smelled like,
all right?

Everything about Frank.

I want you
to take a deep breath...

and place your hands
on the orb.

Susan, where are we?

Frank? Is that you?

Of course it is,
sweetheart.

Oh, Susan. I...

I miss you.

I love you.

Now, there is...

There is something you... you
want to ask me, isn't there?

About that... About
that time you called me

at the hotel room
in Dallas

- and a woman answered the phone.
- Yes!

Well, yeah... w-why didn't
you just ask me, sweetheart?

It was just the maid
cleaning up the room.

I never cheated on you.

I...

I always loved you.

I-I was a faithful,

faithful husband.

Yo, Brian,
check this sh*t out, dude.

Turn to channel 13.

I'm looking at the solution
to all our problems.

Oh, thank you.
Thank you.

Thank you.
That's what we do!

That's what we do!

Coming!

I'm comin'!

Oh, my. Oh my, oh my.

Hello.

Well, what can I
do for you, miss?

Mr. Lloyd...

I'm your biggest fan
in the world,

and I wonder if we could
talk for a minute?

Of course.

Just wait one...
one little minute.

d*ck on, brain off.

- Never fails.
- Sh... sh*t.

Sorry to wake your a*s up,
Mr. Lloyd,

but, uh, we need a favor.

Yo, I was watching your show.

You was talking to
this old lady, right,

and she was crying
and sh*t, like cryin',

and asking about her husband
and, uh,

oh, it was...
Dude, what's his name?

- Um...
- Frank.

- Frank.
- Yeah.

Right. Right.

That sh*t
was crazy, man.

- And it was like all this stuff...
- Hey, hey.

We just need you to kick that psychic
sh*t like you do every day, a'ight?

Wha... What was it called when a...
when the spooks talk through ya?

Channeling.

Channeling. He is a
motherfuckin' professional.

All right, channeling.

I need you
to channel Cliff Bettis,

get him to tell us
where that money at.

What makes you think
that he will tell you now

when he wouldn't tell you
when he was alive?

‘Cause we got his
motherfuckin' b*tch now, man.

Shut up!
I got this, a'ight?

All right.

But we do got his
motherfuckin' b*tch now.

So I figure, look, if Ghost Cliff
don't talk, we just slay her a*s.

I don't have anything
to do with this!

Aw, Sandra, baby.

It's-It's not personal.

I mean, we not monsters.
It's just business, a'ight?

What if I told you...

that the truth is
I cannot talk to dead people?

This m*therf*cker.

Nice try.

Watch your show all the time, man.
We see what you can do.

Besides, if you are a phony,

I figure we just rob the place
and m*rder your a*s, you know,

so the night
won't be a total loss.

Just askin'.

Good question.

I guess a séance is in order.

Yeah, séance that sh*t.

Okay. Uh, um...

I, uh, I have to go to the
bathroom for a second.

I'm so f*cked.

I am so f*cked!

I am so f*cked!

I am so f*cked.

Uh! Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!

John! John, stop whi...
Stop whining.

Stop, stop whining.

Stop.

You are a master showman.

You fool


You can sure as sh*t fool a bunch
of dumb-a*s th*gs from the hood!

Now, you get out there...

and you blow them
the f*ck away.

And you call this a party?

Could be.

Okay... I need you all...

to concentrate on the red candles
at the center of the table.

And concentrate...

concentrate on the image
of Cliff's face.

Look, all right, man,
we gonna do this,

but, hey, but don't try
no funny sh*t, a'ight?

I'm going to count down
from 12...

and when I get
to the end,

Cliff... should...

possess my body.

Let's do it.

Twelve.

Eleven.

Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

One.
Oh, my God!

What's going on?

What's, wh...

Marvin!

Why the f*ck you
have to strangle me, Marvin?

I told you I wasn't
f*ck' nobody else.

Latasha?
Oh, quit lyin', b*tch.

Your a*s ain't nothin' but
old scandalous baldhead-a*s h*!

Hey, I know you.

Hey, fuhgeddaboutit!

You're that moolie
that shot me on that buy.

You think
you're the new kingfish?

Fuhgeddaboutit!

Sammy the Shark?

Wait-Wait, you-you-you
full a sh*t, man.

You tried to cheat me!

Booze, how you gonna put a knife
in your own cousin's back?

Now, come on, Booze!
I...

Pee-Wee? What the f*ck?

Gore, you're a punk!

You had to sh**t me
in a drive-by

‘cause you were too chicken-sh*t
to face me straight up, huh?

Well, you're the
bloody w*nk*r who carjacked me.

This fool's bringing up
every cat we ever did m*rder.

Hey, we... we just wanna
talk to Cliff, man!

I can't
believe you m*therf*ckers

had the nerve
to bring me back.

Oh, my God.

Baby, is it really you?

Yes, it is.

And you are lookin' fine
tonight, sugar.

Welcome back, n*gga.

Booze!
What the f*ck you doin'?

Shut up, n*gga!
I know what I'm doin'.

Now, you gonna tell us
where that money at,

or I'm gonna paint the walls
with your b*tch's brains. Huh?

You can't do that, Booze,
cause your g*n don't work.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, you done f*cked
with the wrong n*gg*r, huh?

Come on.

What the f*ck?

What the f*ck?

Ain't this a b*tch?

You couldn't find me
a better body

than this muthafuckin'
piece of sh*t to get me, huh?

I k*lled you once,

I'm about to do it again with
your punk a*s, m*therf*cker.

Oh, oh, oh, uh-oh, yeah.

What the f*ck
is all this dancin' sh*t?

Ever tell you what my
favorite soul group was, huh?

Huh? From the '70s?

What was it, baby?

- The Spinners, baby.
- That's right. The Spinners.

Whoo!

Aw...

f*ck, man!

sh*t.

You kick their f*ck'
asses for me, Papi.

- B-dog, what we gonna do?
- n*gga, I don't know!

Gore, you always had
a big-a*s mouth.

Shut the f*ck up!

But people who eat glass
in glass houses

shouldn't throw stones.

Ugh.

Oh, f*ck!

Damn.

Somethin'
disagree with your tummy?

They say it's 80 percent
what you eat, baby.

That's right.

- Get back, you spawn of Satan!
- Ah!

In-In-In the name of Christ,
I command you!

Oh, put that away!

Put it away. Where'd
you get religion, boy?

Since-Since Gore showed me
Horror of Dracula.

Well, you got two problems
with that, n*gga.

One, you gotta have faith
for that thing to work,

and two,
I ain't no vampire, fool!

Next time, try watchin'
The Exorcist.

Cliff, chill out, man!

I-I ain't the one
that even k*lled you!

That-That was Booze, man.

I got this m*therf*cker
to bring you back, huh?

Yeah, and I intend
to thank you for that.

Come on now, man.

You got a body now,

and-and you know, he rich,
richer than a m*therf*cker, man.

It's a famous-a*s
white boy right here, man.

Famous-a*s n*gga!

Come on. You know what kind of life
you about to be pimpin' now? Huh?

sh*t, as far as I'm concerned, look,
you ain't got nothing to be mad about.

f*ck.
That-That's a good trade.

Right?

Except my d*ck
was bigger before.

Ah, man. That sh*t
way overrated, man.

Ain't that right, Sandra?

Brian, you never cared about
nobody in your life but yourself.

All you cared about
is power.

Well, I'm gonna give you
all the motherfuckin' power

your greedy-a*s heart
desires.

How about 500 volts?

That stinks, baby!

Ashes to ashes,
dust to dust.

Why are you
talkin' like that?

I got to practice, baby.

Ooh, I gots to practice.

Mmm.

Sit down!
Sit your a*s down.

All right, all right.

Let's get this party started.

I am the man
who gets paid,

because I can really talk
to dead people.

Now, which one a-you
m*therf*ckers wanna go first?

The tale has been
successfully stored in the Patriot's memory.

Who wants to go first?

Now that's a story the
Robo-Patriot could learn from.

I'm glad you liked it.

I have more.

Well, I hope it's as good.

Um, excuse me a moment.
Excuse me, Lauren.

Have you got
the progress report?

He seems to be close
with his employees.

He comes on to all the
women who work for him.

- You too?
- Me too.

But it is not why
I got the promotion.

Why do you
put up with it?

Because I believe
in the overall mission.

American safety.

Yeah, and making
a lot of money.

I'm back.
Another story?

Oh, ready to record.

How about one that deals with
three favorite human pastimes?

Sex, drugs, and this crazy
idea of bros over h*s.

I can't wait to hear this one.
Right, Kelly?

Ah!

Well, this one begins
as most modern romances do...

with technology.

Hi, Ty. Carmen here
with my BFF, Liz.

I told her all about you
and your buddy Kahad,

and we're both really excited
to hook up with you.

I texted you the address,
so we'll see you tonight.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Mm. So, you met these
babes on Tinder?

Oh, yes, I did.

Well, Carmen right there, the one
on the right, I met her on Tinder.

We were chattin' up
a storm, man.

She asked if I had a good-looking
friend for her girl, Liz.

- Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
- Uh-huh!

And I said no,
but I'll bring my boy Kahad.

- Oh, ma... f*ck you, Ty.
- Yeah.

You're lucky you're driving, 'cause I
woulda knocked your a*s out just now.

Would you? Yeah, tell me
that again after tonight,

after you see how much
I hooked us up.

These girls are smokin'.

Oh, oh, okay!
All right.

What did you tell them
to get 'em so hyped?

I'm an agent and you're
a casting director.

I can't believe
that keeps working.

Like, that's not hard
to check up on at all.

No, it isn't, at all.

They are your typical actress,
model, wannabe singer types.

It's stupid. It's easy.

They're dumber than rocks,
that's what they are.

Literally, and I mean, people
believe what they want to believe,

they hear what they wanna hear, and I told
'em we were gonna get 'em real big parts.

They gonna get
big parts all right.

That's my boy.

Yes!

g*dd*mn it. You are bad.
I love it.

- Can I get a amen?
- Amen!

- Ooh!
- You know that!

- Nice crib!
- Yeah.

I thought you said
they were wannabes?

Maybe they're trust fund babes.
I don't know.

Let's go.

Wannabes?

Wow.

Do you f*ck' see this?

Yes!

- Hi, guys! Welcome.
- Hello!

- Come on in.
- Is this Mr. Kahad?

- Yes, I am.
- Ooh.

- Hi, baby.
- What's up, beautiful? How you doin'?

So glad you're cute.
You look good.

- Oh, my God. Thank you, thank you.
- Welcome to our home.

- Yeah. Welcome.
- Mm, you look amazing. This is nice.

- This is...
- This crib is insane.

You guys can throw some
sick parties in here.

- It's just y'all two livin' here?
- Yeah, it's what we're doin' right now.

Mm, it only takes four
to make a party.

Or three
if you're naughty.

Mm.
I like that.

- I wanna be naughty.
- Yeah?

Yeah, I do.

- You wanna be naughty with me?
- Mm-hmm.

Hey, here's a crazy idea.

You guys wanna play
a little game?

"I've got 99 problems,
but blank ain't one."

- All right.
- Okay.

- Five.
- Whoa, whoa!

- Four, three.
- You're going fast here.

- Two.
- Okay, okay, okay.

One!

Okay, okay. What
do we have here?

Okay, Ty.

"I've got 99 problems,
but The Chronic ain't one."

The Chronic, ladies. Come on, right?
Am I right?

- Mm...
- That's who she thought was gonna win?

- You can just hand me the card, man.
- Agree to disagree?

- I don't know about that.
- Agree to disagree.

Uh, Carmen.

"I've got 99 problems,
but smegma ain't one."

- Oh, my...
- That's right.

- That is so...
- I'm done.

What in the world
is smegma?

I'll show ya later.

- Ew!
- What?

Nasty.

And Liz, "I've got 99 problems, but
doin' the right thing ain't one."

- No, it ain't.
- You better watch it. You better get your friend.

That's my girl. Own it, baby.
Own it.

And this round goes to...

- Liz.
- Ooh-hoo!

This is rigged.
This game...

- That's messed up.
- I'm done.

Stop hatin'.

- All I got left... I don't like all that.
- Stop, stop hatin'.

All right, all right, all right.

Settle, children.
Settle.

"A recent
laboratory study shows

that undergraduates
have 50 percent less sex

after being exposed to..."
Five...

- Wait, wait, wait.
- Four...

- Oh, whoa, sh*t, um...
- Three...

- Ooh, girl.
- Two...

- Um, okay.
- One...

I'm in.
I'm in.

All right.

"A recent
laboratory study shows

that undergraduates
have 50 percent less sex

after being exposed to..."

Ooh...
"Coat hanger ab*rtion."

Oh, dude.

Oh, don't act like
that's too far.

- All right. Kahad.
- Mm-hmm.

"A recent
laboratory study shows

that undergraduates
have 50 percent less sex

after being exposed to...
a bleached as*h*le."

That should get you more play
if you're doin' it right, babe.

That was it.
That was it.

- I'll give you that.
- That was a good one.

Some people like that.

- My girl, Carmen.
- Yes, baby.

"A recent laboratory study shows that
undergraduates have 50 percent less sex

after being exposed to...
a micro-p*nis."

- Ooh!
- Why are you pointing this way?

- Itty-bitty!
- Kahad, you got your feelings hurt just now, man?

- Wait, why are... Don't... Hey.
- Super defensive.

- Ooh!
- Don't say that too loud, you're gonna hurt Kahad's feelings.

- Hey, once you go this way...
- First smegma.

- Now micro-p*nis...
- You ain't goin' back, all right?

We'll see, honey.
And the winner is...

- my girl, Carmen.
- Oh, yes!

- Wait, that beat "bleached assholes"?
- This is rigged.

- Afraid so.
- Yeah, that beat "bleached"...

- Really?
- They're kickin' our a*s.

- Super defensive.
- Getting really defensive.

So defensive!

So, uh, Ty tells me
you cast a lot of blockbusters.

What's it like
to work with Marvel?

Um, well, they're really open
to all of my opinions.

In fact, I'm the one who suggested
Chris Pratt for Guardians.

- Wow! That's very cool.
- Mm-hmm.

I have a fourth eye
for spottin' talent.

My third eye's for spottin'
beautiful women like you two.

All right, ladies. After a performance
like that, you deserve a drink.

- Oh, thank you.
- Thank you.

All right,
let's make a toast.

To hot sweaty nights
spent howling at the moon.

I like that.

Ooh!

- Ah.
- Mm.

Mine tastes kinda funny.

Mine too.

g*dd*mn, these babes
are gorgeous.

- Mm.
- Oh, my God. I want the one with the curly hair.

All right,
don't get ahead of yourself,

‘cause I'm-a have both first, and then
you gonna have your turn, all right?

Wait, no. I'm not about to
have your sloppy seconds.

Dude, that's
all you ever get.

Oh-oh, okay. Okay.
So that's what we gonna do?

- We gonna flip a coin, okay?
- Okay.

That's what we gonna do.
Mm-mmm.

I have been in a room just like
this before with that chick Ilsa.

Uh-huh.

I bet you these girls
are into bondage and BDSM

and all sorts
of freaky sh*t.

They probably like
what we're about to do to 'em.

Oh, well,
maybe we should look around,

find their
whips and chains.

Damn, Kahad. What kind of man ties
up and beats unconscious women?

You need to look at yourself.
I'm just sayin'.

- Dang, you're right.
- Yeah.

It is kinda sick, isn't it?
We should just f*ck 'em.

That's my boy right there.
Show some class.

Oh, all right.
Look, look.

I want you to frame in,
focus on her t*ts,

and then we're gonna
pan over right here.

No, what I want you to do is
not tell me how to do my job.

- Kahad... Kahad...
- I'm the director here, okay?

Focus on the t*ts,
all right?

Okay, okay.

g*dd*mn it.

- Crazy. All right, man. We are...
- God.

...set.

We ready?

Um...

It... I don't know.
It's... I don't know.

- What did you do?
- I-I...

- It's broken...
- I didn't do nothin'.

Same thing I've been
doing the past several...

Okay. I'm gonna... Watch.
I'm gonna fix it.

They're vampires. Vampires.

No. Bullshit!

These b*tches must
think it's Halloween.

Trick or treat.

Trick or treat.

Give us
something warm to drink.

- Bring it the f*ck on!
- Yeah, come on!

Ah!

- Go, go, go, go, go!
- Get up!

Get up, Ty!
Get up! Let's go!

- Go, go, go!
- I'm going!

Let's get the f*ck
outta here!

Oh, sh...

No, get off!
Get off!

What is this?
What is this?

Oh, sh*t!
Where the hell are we?

And what the f*ck are those guys?
What the f*ck?

I don't know,
but I don't wanna find out.

Let's get outta here.

I'm not feelin'
too good at all, man.

Ah! Me neither, man.

Those b*tches practically
drained us dry.

We thought you
two would never wake up.

Why are you doing this to us?
What do you want?

Isn't it obvious?

We're a pair of predators who do our
hunting on the Internet just like you.

Ah, f*ck!

Oh, but most
of our stud-morsels

have the good manners
to shrivel up and die...

...after we feed.

But some turn, and we can't just
let them run loose in the streets.

It wouldn't be very...
discreet.

So, we keep them locked down
here, starving with blood lust.

It would be sad if they hadn't all
been such rotten little f*ck.

Look, look. We will not
tell anybody! Anybody!

- Just let us go, okay?
- Christ, man.

- Just let us f*cking go.
- I think I'm gonna be sick.

Shut the f*ck up, man!

We like to give them
the leftovers.

- Stop, no! No! Do not do this! Please...
- Please don't do this!

No, no, no, no!

- No! No! No! Ah!
- Oh, God!

No! No! Get off of me!

Oh! Oh, no! Ah! Ah!

Help me, please! Help!

The tale has been
successfully stored in the Patriot's memory.

Poor b*stards.

Really?

Sounds like the Robo-Patriot
won't be going after rapists.

Like hell it won't.

You do understand that
aliens crossing our borders,

so many of
them criminals, rapists.

We are providing
the answer.

- But those young guys? Hormones.
- Hmm.

Boys will be boys. I mean,
they have to be to become men.

Am I right, Grant?

Yeah, b-boys have to
become men, right?

You agree, Kelly?

Here's the thing.

Some women, far from virtuous,
if you get my meaning.

Yes, virtue.

Yeah, yeah,
and anyone who says

that all women are bastions of
virtue don't understand sh*t.

The sh*t!

No, Mr. Beach,
they do not understand the sh*t!

They do not understand
the sh*t at all.

In fact, no one really
understands the sh*t.

Do we have time
for another tale?

Stay back here, boy.

You got two boys
from Chicago here?

Yes, sir.

I want the one that did
all the talking down in Money.

Yes, sir.

Better turn on some lights,
preacher.

Can't, sir.
Electricity's out.

You the n*gg*r
who did the talkin'?

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.
Don't you "yeah" me, boy.

I'll blow your head off.

Put your clothes on.

You gonna do
what I said, boy?

You okay?
Our baby kicking?

It was that boy again.

Emily, it's just a dream.
We talked about this.

He's not sure
we deserve this baby.

What?
Of course we deserve it.

Baby, I have this feeling
he wants to take it away.

This time
will be different.

What did Dr. Gwinett say
at your last visit?

- "Everything looks fine."
- That was last week.

Well, I'll give him a call to come
over first thing tomorrow, okay?

Now, I just want you to close
your eyes, clear your mind,

think about how beautiful
this baby is gonna be.

Go back to sleep.

No.

No, he'll just be there
waiting for me.

And then...

He's gonna be here.

Emily, get back in bed.

Please! Just leave him!

Please.

Just leave him! Please.

Can't you just leave him?

He ain't got good sense.

He didn't know
what he was doin'.

Don't take him.

Just your shoes.

I don't wear shoes
without socks.

Please.

I will pay you gentlemen
for whatever damages

if you will
just leave him here.

How much you got?

You best be
gettin' back to bed.

And I mean,
I wanna hear springs.

In fact, all you n*gg*r*s
need to go back to sleep.

You know anybody here?

No, sir.
I don't know you.

How old are you?

Sixty-four.

Well, if tomorrow you decide you know somebody
here, you're not gonna live to be 65.

Now get inside...

if you want to live
to see another sunrise.

Well, it happened again
last night.

Well, I-I tried that, but...

Okay.

Yeah, I... I appreciate it.
Whatever you can do.

A-As soon as you can get here.

Thank you.

How is she?
How's Emily?

Well, she finally went to sleep. I just got off
the phone with Dr. Gwinett. He's on his way.

You know I don't think all this
activity is doing her any good.

Mama, let's not
do this today, okay?

I told you she doesn't need
to be worrying about a campaign.

You wouldn't be saying that if I was
throwin' support behind Jenkins.

- It's only because it's Cotton.
- True.

I don't understand you supporting a
race-baiting b*stard like William Cotton.

But no matter who it was, I would be
saying something, because she needs rest.

- You remember last year.
- Yeah, I remember.

I was there in the room.

I'm just saying, another
loss will destroy her.

You don't think I realize that?
You don't think I care?

Well, you must got a pretty
low opinion about your son.

For God sakes, Mama,
it was my child too!

Then damn it, Henry,
act like it.

If I were you...

I'd apologize
to Mr. Bryant.

Maybe you'd get off with
just a bit of a beatin'.

If you cared about your child's
future, your wife's, or my future,

you wouldn't be
supporting Cotton.

That man wants to close down
ten more voting locations,

all of them
in black districts.

No, no, no, all in Democratic
districts, and I'm a Republican.

- Why you putting race into it?
- "Putting"?

He's purposely making it harder
for black people to vote.

- Race is already in it.
- No, it doesn't have to be.

You and Daddy raised me to work
hard, get ahead, and beat the odds.

Daddy said singles
don't mean a damn thing.

Black man's gotta hit a home
run if he wants to score,

and that's
what I'm doing.

Not everybody
can hit a home run.

I bet William Cotton and every
one of those r*cist fools

he appeals to
can't hit one either.

William Cotton's
about to be governor.

That's a home run.

It is not a home run when
you're born on third base.

Oh, Mama.

What the hell is she doin'?

Emily?

Emily, shouldn't you stay in bed
until Dr. Gwinett gets here?

He's having doubts.

Who's having doubts?
About what?

The boy. He's having
doubts about dying.

And if he doesn't die, he's gonna
come right out of those woods.

- I need to...
- No, no, no.

- Nobody's gonna take our baby, okay?
- I do feel a presence.

Mama, please! Stop!

Can't you see
she's wound up enough?

Now, listen,
both of you.

Nobody's out there, and no one's
gonna touch our baby, all right?

Let's go back inside.

Dr. Gwinett'll be here
in a minute.

Come on.
It's okay.

Emily, the baby
seems to be just fine.

- You're sure?
- Yes.

But do yourself and your baby
a favor and stay in bed.

And if things aren't better by
tomorrow, you come by my office.

- Good?
- Yeah.

- Keep an eye on her.
- Okay.

What about the dreams?

Pregnancy can do odd things
with body chemistry, hormones.

They're just dreams.

Like I used to tell
my children,

think of something really
wonderful as you drift off.

That often does the trick.

So you mean, she shouldn't even come
downstairs for the fund-raiser this evening?

I'm telling you,
she shouldn't leave that bed.

- All right. Thanks, Martin.
- Anytime, Henry.

You think Dr. Gwinett
is right, Mama Bradley?

I just need
to think good thoughts?

I don't know,
but I know someone who might.

Mama, where you goin'?

I need you to stay with Emily while
I deal with this fund-raiser.

You watch her until I get back.

And to hell
with that damn fund-raiser!

Excuse me.
Excuse me.

Thank you, sir.

Ladies and gentlemen, if I could
have your attention, please.

First of all, we'd like
to thank you for coming out.

But for now, I want to
introduce the man of the hour,

Mayor, soon to be governor,
William Cotton.

- Thank you, Henry.
- Yes, sir.

Appreciate that.

Thank you very much.
Appreciate you coming out.

I'd like to thank Henry
again for this fine event

at this beautiful fabulous
home he's got here.

What a place.
What a place.

And take a look at this.

Takes you back in time,
doesn't it?

Goes well
with my campaign slogan.

"Let's take Mississippi back"

to the core values we've always
had here in the South.

And to have
a man like Henry...

who, in his past, would have
been serving this party...

instead of hosting it.

Anyway, anyway, now Henry
has this fine plantation home.

And a very fine, and a very white wife, as I recall.

- Where is she, anyway, Henry?
- Ah, she's feeling a little tired, sir.

The pregnancy and all.

Well, we'll let
that little lady rest.

I imagine it's big work carrying
around all that extra weight.

It makes me glad I got
an outie instead of a innie,

if you catch
my meaning.

The thing is... thing is, Henry,
his beautiful white wife,

this fine home,

only goes to prove that we have moved
past all that racial rigmarole.

Times have changed, my friends.
Times have changed.

Hmm.

Get on the post, boy.

I've got him.
I've got him.

Now, boy, you ain't
got the right

to half look
at a white woman...

much less whistle at one.

- I do all the time back home.
- Well, you ain't back home.

Down here, n*gg*r*s gonna respect
a white man and his woman.

I'm not respecting anyone
that's not respecting me.

And that's all
there is to that.

Chicago, would you
please apologize to the man

so maybe he
take it easy on you?

- You shut up, boy!
- That's right, boy!

I don't need one n*gg*r tellin'
another n*gg*r how to obey me.

I can do that on my own.

Them that want to get ahead can get ahead.
Them that want to vote...

can get their lazy a*s off the sofa
they bought with a welfare check.

- Yeah.
- Sign up for an ID, and go to a voting booth!

On a proper weekday to vote!

Closing a few polling locations does not mean
that we're trying to keep the blacks from voting.

No, sir.

We just trying
to be efficient.

After all, we're all
in the same party, right?

- Indeed we are, sir.
- It doesn't have to be about race...

when it can be about money.

And I'm-a take all your money
here tonight...

to ensure our victory
in the fall

so we can take Mississippi back to the
values that made this state great.

I don't know what kind of poison
they feedin' n*gg*r*s up north

to make 'em act
the way you do.

But down here,

you're either gonna be a good
n*gg*r or a dead n*gg*r.

I'll die like a man
before I live like a n*gg*r.

You uppity...

You sure that's the way
you want it, boy?

I'm a reasonable man.

I ain't ever beat
no n*gg*r before.

So I'm gonna give you
one more chance...

to make the right decision.

Rousing speech, sir.
I see a lot of checkbooks open.

Yeah, money's important, Henry.

But not near as important
as you remembering

how to vote on closing those
polling locations, councilman.

Now, we need you
to get out front,

take some of the heat off of
your less civic-minded relative.

Now, you do that,
and I'll see to it

that you get
the Mayor's office

when I get
the Governor's mansion.

- I'm honored, sir.
- He's going to live!

- Emily!
- Hold on, hold on.

We all know what happened last time.
It'll be all right.

Henry,
he's decided to live.

Emily, we all happy to know
your baby done decided to live.

That boy from the fields
has decided to live,

and if he does,
it will k*ll this baby.

Emily!

Emily!

Excuse me.
I'm sorry.

No, he's out there.
He's in that field.

Now I will k*ll him.
I'll k*ll him myself.

Emily!

I see you!

He's right...
He's right there, Henry.

- Emily, there's nobody there.
- He is k*lling our baby.

Please, sweetie.
Just put down the knife.

- The baby's fine.
- No, Henry, look.

No!

See? It's getting smaller.
He's k*lling our baby.

- There's no one there.
- You go back and die!

What?

- No. No. No, Henry...
- Please.

- He's there! He has to die!
- No.

- No, he has to die!
- Come on in, please.

- He has to die!
- It's all right. Just come inside.

Thanks for nothin', Mama.

Give us a minute.

Emmett?

I brought up some tea
and a little fruit.

He can see him,
can't he?

He ought to see something.
He's been out there all night.

- I do believe he can.
- I knew it.

You good?

I can't believe you brought
that crazy voodoo man over here.

Made me look like a damn fool
in front of everybody.

Well, I'm glad to see you've
kept your priorities straight.

Anyway, you've been lookin'
like a fool for months.

Mama, not every black person
has to vote the same way.

Some of us think
for ourselves.

And some of you only
think about yourselves.

More important to get
into office than do something.

Well, we don't have to worry
about that after tonight.

Thank you.

- Did you see him?
- Yeah.

And?

He want to talk to you.

What? I'm not playing along
with this BS...

Henry, talk to him!

I don't want to lose
another baby.

- And you won't.
- Wrong. You gonna lose more than that.

You're gonna lose everything
unless you talk to him.

And what do I talk to this
invisible man about, huh?

- Sacrifice.
- Sacrifice.

He doesn't think
you worth dying for.

Who the hell
asked him to?

Jesus! Y'all got me talking like
somebody's really out there.

He said that a black man
votin' to close the polls

to keep other black folks
from voting... last straw.

What?
Are you serious?

So you conjure up this nonsense
to get me to change my vote?

- I didn't make him say that...
- Unbelievable!

Henry! It's getting smaller.

I'm calling Dr. Gwinett.

Can't nothing good happen now...
unless he talk.

Can I talk to him?

It couldn't hurt.

Hey, Martin.

It's Dr. Gwinett.

Where is she?

Um, she's upstairs.

I've never seen
anything like this before.

It's like the child
is shrinking.

What?
What do we do?

We... We can't
lose another, Doc.

It'll k*ll her.
It'll k*ll us both.

Wait, are you saying that this
is your child inside her?

What? Yes!

Doc, wait, wait.
Where you going?

I don't work for coloreds, and I definitely
don't work for any mixed marriage.

No, he's not my husband.
He kidnapped me.

- Emily, what?
- You need to leave this house now.

You can't make me
leave my own house.

Bull! Negroes can't own
homes in this district.

Now do as I say and get your
black a*s out of this house!

- The only one leaving this house is you.
- No. No.

- Get out!
- Don't touch him.

Get out!
Emily, stop!

No!

Get...

Get the hell out!

You don't put your hands
on a white man like that!

You b*stard!

Stop!

Emily, stop!

I don't know where
you stole that phone,

but unless it's got an app on it
to turn your black a*s invisible,

you got hell
to pay, boy!

Henry! It doesn't matter what I say.
You need to talk to him.

Mama, not now.
I don't know what's goin' on.

What's goin' on is that
you need to see that boy.

Otherwise, your child
won't be the only one lost.

All right,
where's this ghost?

Stop being disrespectful,
Henry.

He's right in front of you.
My apologies.

Okay, this is stupid.

If you want your wife back, you got
to see what's in front of you.

Focus.
Open your eyes.

Respect the sacrifices that's been gifted you.

- Where'd you come from?
- The past.

But I've been blessed
with a chance to see the future,

and, well, it's not
at all what I thought.

What kinda craziness
is this?

No craziness, sir.

Just realizing I went through a lot
of hell for nothing, so it seems.

What do you mean?
Who the hell are you?

My family calls me Bobo,
but you might know me by Emmett.

Emmett Till, sir.

You're trying to tell me
you're Emmett Till?

Most people recognize me
more like this.

Mr. Henry, a lot of folks think that Emmett's
death sparked the Civil Rights Movement.

- Who the hell are you?
- Respect the sacrifice.

I'm Carole Denise McNair, sir.

And these are my friends
from Sunday school.

Addie Mae Collins, Cynthia
Wesley and Carole Robertson.

- You're the four little girls.
- Yes, sir.

From 16th Street
Baptist Church.

And Emmett standing up
and dying like he did

helped us get voting rights.

Why would you support a party
that wants to take them away?

If this boy died
for civil rights,

then he should want me to have the
freedom to do and vote as I please.

I didn't die so you could have
more freedom to do as you please.

I died so you could have more
freedom to do what's right.

Like you had a choice.

Respect the sacrifices.

You always have a choice.

Mine was to live like a coward
or die like a man.

But maybe it wasn't worth it.

Maybe none of our deaths
were worth it.

But that would mean that James, Andrew and
Michael's deaths weren't worth it either.

Chaney, Goodman, Schwerner.

Or even Mr. Evers.

And I'm pretty sure
you know who that is.

Dr. King.

Don't forget her.

- Who is that?
- My mother.

Her sacrifice was letting
the world see my body,

knowing this horrible image would
haunt her for the rest of her life.

A lot of folks
took a lot of pain

for you to be so cavalier
about your freedom, Mr. Bradley.

Respect the sacrifices
gifted you.

Respect the sacrifices
gifted you.

Respect the sacrifices
gifted you.

Respect the sacrifices
gifted you.

- Respect the sacrifices given you.
- No.

Respect the sacrifices
given you.

- No, no, no!
- Respect...-

Stop!

Well, it seems
I have a second chance.

And this time, I think I'm gonna
choose a bit differently.

Emmett, you can't.

Actually, he can.
But you can't let him.

If Emmett doesn't die,
history changes.

Perhaps
none of them die.

Perhaps, the only thing that dies is a
chance at the civil rights you enjoy.

No, this is crazy.
No way this can be happening.

It is happening, Henry, and you
need to stop it before it...

Go!

There he is! That's the
n*gg*r that r*ped me.

What?

- Come here, boy.
- Emily, I'm your husband!

You're just makin' it worse,
disrespectin' that white woman.

Hold on a minute. He didn't r*pe her.
That's his wife!

Hush up, you n*gg*r b*tch!

Yeah, stay down.

You m*therf*cker!
I'll k*ll you!

Get...

Watch it, now.

- Get him outta here!
- Let me go!

Let me go!
Let me go!

Get him!

- Wait! Get him!
- Hey!

Can't you do something?

What would you like us to do,
Mr. Bradley?

Go back and die to make
your life a little easier?

It's not for me. It's for
my child, for my wife.

That's not her. She's not r*cist.
She loves me.

She did.
And she can again.

But you have to join us.
You have to sacrifice.

What does that mean?

It means you wouldn't
be here without me.

Without us.

And as you can see,
without all the sacrifices,

everything in
your world changes.

If what you want
is worth us dying for,

why isn't it worth
you dying for?

'Cause you're already dead.

Don't have to be.

I can make a different choice,
live a different life.

Maybe we all live
different lives.

Maybe I'll go to school, maybe I become
a councilman, and I can avoid this.

But if you want me
to take that whooping,

if you want us
to sacrifice our lives

to make the lives of your
loved ones a little better,

you need to change, sir.

Okay. I won't vote to close the
polls, and I'll leave the party.

That's no longer an option.

You've got to go
the extra mile.

Will you sacrifice with me?

I, uh...

Well, that seems
to answer it.

Looks like this is good-bye.

No, wait.

- Let's go!
- No, wait. Wait, wait!

Please! Please!
I need more time.

Just, I-I j...
I just need more time! Please!

Wait!
Get off me!

- No, wait! I need more time...
- Take this black b*tch too!

Please! Let me go!
Let me...

If you left any seed in me, you could
be damn well sure I'm gonna k*ll it.

Okay, I will. I will! I will!

- I will!
- Get him!

Son of a b*tch!
Get him!

I'll do it.
I'll take your sacrifice.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

I'm a man.

Boy, he said "Are you sure?"

I'm a man.

And I intend to live like one until
the last breath God gives me.

Then take
what you asked for.

Oh, my God!
What happened?

I'm proud of you, son.

Can't say that was
your best story, Simms.

Can't say that I liked
that one much at all.

We should get moving,
Mr. Beach.

The event
is ready to start.

Grant, is the Robo-Patriot
prepped?

Uh, entirely, sir.

Here we go.

When these
media assholes see this,

it's just gonna
be like holy sh*t.

- Yeah! The sh*t!
- Yeah.

The doo-doo!
The poopity pop!

Are you okay, Simms?

Apologies.

I mean, it's just that... Do you mind
if I watch the press conference?

I mean...

I would love
to see the sh*t!

I think it's gonna
be quite amazing!

Ooh, hoo hoo!

- Oh!
- No harm, I suppose.

Let's go.

So, to further explain, let me bring up
the leader in corrective technology,

Dumass Beach.

Thank you, Kelly.
I'm gonna get right to it.

Here at Beach Industries, we want
to do what's right for America.

Now, that means safer
streets, cities and states.

Beach Industries wants
to help create a country

where foreign scum, t*rrorists,
rapists, and criminals of all kinds

cannot only be quickly
and easily identified,

but justly convicted,

and punished in a way that saves
billions of tax dollars,

that until now
have been wasted on funding

a legal system that
is woefully ineffective.

Thank you, Grant.

So today, I present to you
the future of American security,

the Robo-Patriot.

This machine not only has the
ability to, within seconds,

scan NSA, FBI, CIA, local
police, and social media files

to quickly identify those who have
already committed criminal acts,

but uses new technology
created by my company

to predict a person's criminal
or anti-American threat level

by reading brain waves,
heat patterns and DNA,

which it captures, using molecules found
in a person's breath as they exhale.

Well, this gives a whole new
meaning to the term, "bad breath."

Uh, Mr. Beach, are you saying

this thing can
predict criminal behavior?

More than that.

I'm saying it knows


if someone will or will not
commit a future crime

that could harm any number
of lawful American citizens.

This is an intelligent machine
that can police our streets

as well as serve as judge, jury,
and if need be, executioner.

I know.
It sounds amazing, right?

So, we prepared
a little demonstration.

We have placed among you men and
women who have criminal histories.

Let's see if the Robo-Patriot
can find them.

Is this thing
gonna k*ll someone?

The Robo-Patriot will do whatever is necessary
to protect America and its true citizens.

So unless you have plans on,
uh, harming America...

Anyone?

You should all be fine.

Robo-Patriot is activated and looking
for threats against America.

Robo-Patriot identifies
criminals at threat level two.

Threat level two is simply
small-time burglars.

Whoa.

Turn yourselves in

to avoid further legal actions
to protect America.

There we go.
There we go!

How about that,
ladies and gentlemen.

American technology at work.

Built in America.

Robo-Patriot identifies
illegals without papers.

Please turn yourselves in, or I will
do what it takes to protect America.

Ah, it's a beautiful thing.

How about
that, ladies and gentlemen.

Here to protect your families,
your American families.

How do we know
these aren't plants?

Well, as you know, I run the toughest prison...

- What?
- Like a person, it can learn from secondhand experience.

Stories, fables, tales.

Those young guys? Hormones.
Boys will be boys.

Your kind are
particularly accomplished liars.

Your brothers and sisters make up
an enormous part of my profits.

As well as serve
as judge, jury, executioner.

Judge, jury, executioner.

Robo-Patriot identifies one immediate clear
and present threat to American civilization.

Oh!

Uh-oh! Perhaps he thinks the fake media...
is a real threat.

All right.

Robo-Patriot
recognizes Dumb a*s b*tch.

That's, uh, Dumass Beach.

Um, it, uh, polices much better
than it speaks. Trust me.

As a lethal threat that must be immediately
neutralized to secure American safety.

Neutralizing the threat
in five, four, three, two...

- What the hell's...
- ...one.

No!

g*dd*mn thing!
What the hell is...

No! No, stop!

Somebody's gonna
lose their job...

Robo-Patriot recognizes
worthless accomplices

aiding and abetting
Dumb a*s b*tch.

No! No!

I never liked him!

Help!

This robot has
lost its damn mind!

sh*t! sh*t!

- Robo-Patriot will protect America.
- f*ck!

No, no, no, no!

f*ck! f*ck, f*ck, f*ck!

Metal m*therf*cker!

No! No, no!

Help!

Help! Help! No!

Wait. No, no. Please.

- Oh!
- Beach!

Going my way?

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
Drive!

I think it got me.

Christ!

I'm afraid Christ can no longer
be of service, Mr. Beach.

Oh, skip the religious
lecture and drive, Simms!

Holy sh*t!

Ah, yes.

The sh*t!

What the hell is your
black a*s laughing about?

You think this is
some kind of joke?

You drive this car
to a g*dd*mn hospital

before I bleed out and die,
you crazy n*gg*r!

This ain't no joke!

This ain't no car.

I ain't no n*gg*r!

And your worthless soul
is no longer alive!

Where am I?
Where am I?

Mr. Dumass Beach, welcome
to hell, m*therf*cker!

No! No! No!

Welcome to hell, m*therf*cker!

Ha!

Now that... was some sh*t.