Hey, boy.
Hey, boy!
Come on, boy.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey, fella.
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
No more f*cking finals!
Hey, don't do it!
Don't go to college.
It's a f*cking scam.
It f*cking sucks!
- Bert, got any more smokes?
- No.
Bert: So I'm fat. So what?
I hope she's not anorexic.
Put her there, sport!
What's the matter?
Cat got your tongue?
- Jesus!
- God damn it, Dennis, no!
No, Dennis, no!
No, don't hit him
or anything.
Everybody knows not
to sit next to Dennis.
- He'll give you tetanus.
- Maybe you should make a sign.
There's a stream around back,
if you want to wash your hand.
I'll get you a towel.
Hey, pal,
do you think it's a smart idea
leaving your kid here
where he might be
a danger to people?
What are you saying exactly?
I'm just saying,
if such an incident
were to bring about a "lawsuit,"
- you might be held liable.
- Jeff, save it for law school.
Cute kid.
Hey.
What's your name?
Yeah!
Man: If you're interested
in really good glasswork,
it's cheap,
but it's an antique.
Some of those bottles
up there
are dated
before the Civil w*r.
And over there,
I used to have-
in that empty space,
I used to have
some of the prettiest
Shirley Temple bottles I've ever seen.
And this woman came in here
with the palsy, the poor soul.
She thought
they were so cute,
and she reached for them
and knocked every one down
and broke them all
to damn pieces.
So I took her in the back and gave her
some coke and ammonia.
I thought she was
gonna have a spell.
We should get something
for your mom to say thanks.
How about some fox piss?
- My mom would love fox piss.
- Oh Lord, don't drop that.
If you do,
that's powerful stuff.
All the foxes around
would come down here.
You'd have friends
you'd never had before.
You all here for a vacation?
Jeff: Yeah, we're renting
a cabin for a week.
That's nice. And if you go
in the woods...
- be very careful.
- Why, what's in the woods?
Tommy, get those kids
their sandwiches.
They're all wrapped up.
- So, what's the fox urine for?
- That's for foxes.
- What's the r*fle for?
- That's for n*gg*r*s.
Okay, let's see.
Let's give you those sandwiches now.
I think we're about ready
to get y'all out of here.
- That's $56 even.
- Okay.
Anything I can do
for you, friend?
No, I think that's...
Thank you.
You all have
a good vacation now.
- You too.
- Come back and see me.
Thanks a lot, man.
You have a nice day.
Jeff: Did that guy
just say, "n*gg*r"?
Marcy: Yeah, you
don't have to repeat it.
You can call it the "n" word.
Hey.
Boy, you want to give me
one good reason
why you would steal
a Snickers bar.
The nougat?
Sorry, man.
My bad.
All right. Enjoy.
Thanks.
What?
Moron.
Jeff:
What's wrong with you, dude?
Bert: Sorry.
I should burn his f*cking
store down, the r*cist f*ck!
- Marcy: All right, make a left.
- Jeff: Here?
- Marcy: Make a left.
- Jeff: Where else am I gonna go?
- Jeff: Oh, and then down here...
- Bert: Stop the car!
Stop, stop!
I left my Mott's apple juice
back at the store!
- Women: Oh my God.
- Come on!
- Paul: No, we're not going back.
- Come on!
Paul: I'm sure this river
is in the map, right?
Yes!
Paul: There's no way
that this is on the map.
Karen: It is on the map.
Do you want to look?
This map's for Cincinnati.
Karen: Shut up.
Jeff: Fine, f*ck it.
We'll go this way.
Marcy:
Oh my gosh. Wow.
"Welcome, y'all.
Enjoy your vacation
from all of us
at Bunyan Mountain Getaways."
Oh my God, Jeff,
check it out.
It's so cute- this little room,
this little bed...
lts view is so beautiful.
The view of the shrubs...
and the bush
and the antlers.
It's gonna be so perfect.
We're here for a week,
and there's no one
to bother us.
Who's up for a dip?
We're- they're-
Yeah. Safe sex.
- Eh, Paul?
- Yeah?
Have fun.
It's kind of sweet,
you know?
They seem pretty in love.
Bert, what the hell is that?
Huh? I'm gonna go sh**t
some squirrels.
Why would you want
to k*ll squirrels?
- 'Cause they're g*y.
- Don't be a f*cking ret*rd.
Kidding. I don't care if
they're g*y or straight.
- I'll k*ll them either way.
- Will you be careful with that?
Would you relax, man?
It's a f*cking BB g*n. Relax.
Sorry.
So, Karen...
how long have we
known each other?
Seventh grade, right?
Yeah.
I was thinking, we've known
each other for so long,
and even though we-
Karen: That's hot!
And, even though we've
always been good friends,
we never actually-
I've always thought
you were really cool.
Hey, race you to the raft.
?? La la la la la
la la la la ??
?? La la la la la
la la la la la la... ??
f*ck!
Jeff: Oh my God!
?? La la la la la
la la la la la la... ??
Oh, feels f*cking great!
- You like that?
- Yeah!
Jeff: I'm sorry.
Oh yeah!
So you know Ken Webb?
Yeah.
Short, greasy Ken.
The guy with the CDs, right?
Yeah.
He tried to kiss me.
- He did?
- Yeah.
Two days ago.
This guy I've known
for 12 years,
he's a family friend.
He puts his hands
on my face,
full-on tongue!
It was so gross!
Why, was it gross because
you've known him for so long or...
'cause he's gross?
No, it was definitely him.
I don't know. When you've known
someone a long time,
you just want to kiss them just
to see if they're a good kisser.
There's nothing wrong
with that, right?
No.
- Where are you going?
- What's it look like?
- I thought we were kissing.
- Yeah, we were.
So-
so what, you like me now?
Is this like a date?
Don't be g*y.
Come back, Mr. Woodchuck.
I'm gonna get you now.
Oh sh*t.
Oh f*ck.
I'm sorry, man.
What?
- Why did you sh**t me?
- I thought you were something else.
I didn't- f*ck!
- Are you all right?
- I'm s-
sick.
- I need help.
- Oh man.
I'll get you
some help, all right?
I'll be right back.
I got a car.
Oh f*ck.
Oh please, help me.
- f*ck.
- I'm sick. I need water.
Just lay down.
Don't move, man.
- Water.
- I'll get you water.
Just stay-
don't come near me, okay?
Is that your-
- is that your cabin?
- No!
Just stay there!
Please, stay there.
Don't make me
f*cking sh**t you, man.
Just stay the f*ck back,
please!
f*ck!
f*ck!
f*ck!
What the f*ck, man?
Where were you?
You gonna burn the whole
f*cking place down?
What are you,
Smoky the Clown now?
Don't you mean,
Smoky the Bear?
Whatever.
This is horseshit, man.
- It's a fireplace.
- How old are you?
Can't you be responsible
for anything?
We can't leave you alone
for five minutes
without you destroying something!
What were you sh**ting at?
I heard a squirrel.
I was just looking for a squirrel.
- A squirrel?
- Yeah.
- f*cking idiot.
- Jeff: To stick up his a*s.
Jeff: Why don't you
tell us the story?
What are you gonna roast
on that thing?
Come on, Paul,
tell them story.
No, I can't.
It's a traumatic experience.
- I don't want to talk about it.
- We like traumatic stories.
- Not about me, but...
- Trauma bonds people.
- You can tell us.
- It bonds those who go through it,
- not the people you tell it to.
- Tell the f*cking story!
All right!
So there's this bowling alley
when we were growing up.
You guys might remember it-
Lenny Meads Brighton Bowl?
It was in Brighton, right?
That's probably why it was
called Brighton Bowl.
We used to go there
for birthday parties
or with my dad
for the weekend.
This one time, I asked
my dad if we could go.
He's like, "No.
The bowling alley's closed."
This marshmallow's so burnt!
It turned out there had
been a break-in.
All the employees
were held at gunpoint.
After they had been
gagged and beaten,
they were tied to chairs.
The chairs...
they were set in a circle,
so that way everybody
was forced to watch
everybody else.
And then the robber,
this sick maniac,
he goes and finds one of those
little ball-peen hammers.
And then one by one...
he smashed the backs
of their heads open with the hammer.
Everyone had to watch
their friends die,
knowing that they'd
soon be next.
Ball-peen...
The guy doesn't stop there.
He breaks out the fire axe.
The alarm goes off...
he doesn't give a sh*t.
He hacked off
all of their limbs.
The cops found six
bloody torsos
tied to the bowling seats.
Blood everywhere...
Turns out the guy was
some disgruntled employee.
That was
my childhood playground.
Bert, you as*h*le,
it's not funny.
Yes it is,
you f*cking sl*t.
Jeff?
What?
Tell them about
the happy bald guy.
- No, I can't take it.
- He gave us our shoes
and quarters for
the video games.
There was a room with
a pool table,
but my dad wouldn't
let us go there.
The bald guy was always happy,
always smiling.
But the k*ller
got him too.
When the cops searched
the place,
they found hacked off limbs
at the end of the bowling lanes.
The guy had bowled
people's organs.
Arms, legs, everything.
They found the bald guy's head
in the ball return.
- He was still smiling.
- Oh, no.
I knew you were full of sh*t!
You suck!
No! It was in the paper.
I swear!
I'm laughing because
Jeff is an as*h*le
and he's making me laugh.
I swear...
I loved this place.
I still remember the sounds...
the cracking,
the bouncing.
The smell of the shoes,
the sound of the Q-Bert machine...
Holy sh*t!
What are you doing?!
- I'm cool.
- Are you spying on us?
- I'm cool.
- Is your dog friendly?
Yeah, he's cool.
This is Dr. Mambo.
Here, boy.
Come on, Dr. Mambo.
Is it "Dr." like a physician
or a professor?
Yeah, he's a professor...
of being a dog.
Oof! Faced!
Scratch-moded.
It's a positive bonfire.
Got room for one more?
Actually, we were having a private
conversation, if you don't mind.
That's cool.
I guess I'll smoke
all this weed by myself.
All: No, no.
It's fine.
It's not that private.
Awesome.
Yeah, sit right here.
Bert: I think he's gonna
f*ck her.
Guy: Awesome.
- Wait, so your name was...
- Justin...
- but you can call me "Grim."
- Grim.
Like Grimace?
"Grim" is my skating name.
I got it in Berkeley while
competing in the X-Games.
Really? Karen's going
to go to Berkeley.
Dude...
awesome.
I love Berkeley.
People there are so wacked.
I met these guys and they had me
f*cked up for five days straight.
They wouldn't let me drink
anything but beer.
Yeah, I've done that,
except I did it with JD.
Karen's got a great idea.
We should only drink beer
for the rest of the trip.
I could probably do that,
but I doubt you could.
I'll bet you. I can only drink
beer the rest of the trip.
If I drink anything else,
you can have the rest of my supply.
All right, you're on.
We only drink beer.
Bert: You're on.
So, you're a skater?
Is that your occupation?
Oh, crap.
Party's over.
Hey Justin...
Grim...
you want to come inside?
I'd love to, but I left
all this sh*t outside my tent.
It's starting to rain,
if it gets f*cked up,
it's like $4,000 worth
of sh*t pissed away.
How far away is your tent?
20 minutes away, but if I book
I can be back in 30.
- Cool. Bring the weed.
- I will.
Check you dudes later.
Come on, Dr. Mambo.
- Jeff: Freak.
- Karen: I thought he was funny.
Bert:
How did it work?
What do you mean "how"?
It had a hose...
a bunch of different settings,
pulse, power...
stream.
And you came every time?
Totally.
You can imagine my disappointment
the first time I had sex.
Tell me about it.
What's that supposed
to mean?
- I've got a better story.
- Paul: I'm sorry,
but no story is better
than Karen and the shower massage.
No, seriously.
One time I was masturbating...
and my dog came up
and started licking my ba*ls.
Right as I came it stuck
its tongue up my a*s.
That's serious f*cking
masturbation talent right there.
f*cking good.
He'd better have brought more weed
or I won't let him in.
Relax, pal.
I'm coming.
His name's Grim.
Jesus Christ.
Help me...
please.
I need a doctor.
Oh sh*t.
Man: Doctor.
Yeah, all right.
Somebody grab a blanket
or something.
You...
you shot me.
No, no, no.
There's no way this contagious
f*ck's coming in here.
- He's sick, for Christ's sake.
- You want him to come in here
and touch all of your sh*t,
your f*cking soap...?
Let's throw him
a blanket or something.
- Or your d*uche?
- Let's drive him to a doctor.
He's not coming in!
We're out of range.
I'm not getting anything.
- f*ck!
- What's that?
- He's in the car.
What?
- Jeff: m*therf*cker.
- Karen: Why's he f*cking with us?
- Grab your g*n.
f*ck!
Hurry up!
He's in the car already!
Get out of the f*cking car!
Get out of there.
Get out of the car!
Get out!
Get out of the f*cking car!
f*ck!
Get the f*ck out!
Get out of there!
- f*ck!
- You shot the car!
What was I supposed to do?
Oh my God!
f*ck!
Paul: sh*t!
sh*t!
Oh!
- Get him!
- He's coming towards us.
Stop or I'll f*cking
stab you!
Stop! Stop!
Back off.
f*ck off!
Leave us alone!
f*ck off!
I know. I know.
What else were we gonna do?
First he gets his sh*t
all over the car,
and I don't want him
touching me, you, or anybody.
I think the rain will
put him out.
He's dead anyway.
You saw that sh*t on him.
He looked like he was
skinned alive.
We have to tell the police
it wasn't our fault.
I think we should tell them now.
Calm down.
There's nothing we can do.
The car's f*cked.
We need a mechanic. We'll find
somebody who knows one,
and then we'll report
the accident.
That's the keyword here.
It was an accident.
Paul: The guy's skin...
holy sh*t.
You should clean up some
of this sh*t while we're gone.
I'll save some for you guys.
- Just stick with the girls.
- What's that supposed to mean?
It means you're
a f*cking p*ssy.
That's f*cked up.
What's f*cked up is you beating
the sh*t out of my truck.
What about the jag-off
with the r*fle?
Did you forget about him?
We all f*cked up that car,
don't just put it on me.
Good morning, boys.
Are you going
to k*ll each other now?
Where are you going?
To get help.
So...
Bert and Jeff are gone.
I know.
Last night was
a f*cked up situation,
- and I think...
- That guy asked for our help.
We lit him on fire.
Can you understand if I'm not
in a particularly social mood?
I got scared.
I was...
I was just trying to help.
Karen...
I'm sorry, Paul.
Every time I close my eyes
I see him.
It was an accident.
The guy was going to die
anyway.
Better?
Yeah.
Thanks, Paul.
Jeff: Hello?
God damn it!
God damn it!
God damn it!
God damn it!
Hold it! You there!
Do you see this?!
Do you see this sh*t?!
We didn't see anything.
Tell Murray I can't eat this sh*t.
Some animal's been running around
infecting everything.
What am I supposed to do
with a sick hog? Huh?
I am not about to
eat that meat. Would you?
- No, I'm a vegetarian.
- None of this sh*t is good.
It's all sick.
It's all gotta go back.
I want me a new hog!
We were just looking
for a mechanic.
Mechanic?
You won't find one around here.
- You'll have to go to town.
- Bert: That's the thing.
Our car's busted,
so we can't get into town.
We need somebody to take
us into town
- so we can find a mechanic.
- Oh.
I've already been
in town today, sorry.
All right, if you do go back,
would you tell us?
We're staying at a cabin,
and...
we don't know Murray.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yes, of course,
of course.
Why didn't you
just come out and say that?
Come on inside,
I've got a radio.
We'll call Ricky.
He's got a tow truck.
- Call Ricky.
- Ricky.
Sorry to bother you, but this
crazy guy came out of the woods
and tried to trash
our car.
Woman: Sounds terrible.
I have some juice.
So this person damaged
your car?
It was just this crazy hermit.
Real dangerous.
- We chased him away with bats.
- It wasn't Henry, was it?
Nah, sh*t, never.
Henry?
My cousin Henry.
He knows about that ordinance.
He wouldn't do something like that.
You hit him with a bat?
Both: No.
No, it wasn't Henry.
Our friend Walter, he got drunk.
One thing led to another...
- That's no good.
- Yeah.
I've got a great idea. Why don't
we take a walk down ourselves?
- It's really nice out.
- We'll just walk.
- I haven't seen the scenery.
- You sure? Ricky's awfully handy.
- Thanks for your help.
- Are you sure?
A little fresh air
sounds great.
We really appreciate your help.
Take care.
We burned Henry.
f*ck!
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Is anyone home?
Hello?
- Ah!
- Bert, you d*ck-nose.
- Shut up.
What the hell?
- Did you find anybody?
- No, nothing.
I followed the path
that the old guy ran,
but I couldn't find him.
He could still be alive.
No, it's impossible.
- Want any beef jerky?
- No, put it away.
- Why?
- It's not our house.
So?
- Did you find a phone?
- No.
I felt weird looking around.
There's nobody here.
We found this other place,
but...
there was
nobody there either.
I wonder if the cops
know about it yet.
I doubt it.
If they did know,
they'd have been
at the cabin by now.
Good morning.
Deputy Winston,
Bunyan County
Sheriff's Department.
Hi.
What can I do for you?
I'm on patrol
in my jurisdiction
and I heard there was a lot
of commotion here last night.
I wanted to know
what the story is.
Yeah, sure. Some guy tried
to break into our cabin.
And he was sick.
I don't know what kind
of disease he had,
but he was a mess.
I have to report this.
Yeah, totally.
My friends are out looking for
a neighbor so we could call you.
We don't have a phone here.
Everyone uses radios.
That's what I use.
Hey...
Looks like you guys were doing
some pretty good partying, huh?
Yeah, you know,
we were drinking...
and then this guy came along
and tried to break into
the cabin.
We had no choice
but to get rough.
I feel awful,
but he was going crazy.
He smashed into our car,
and then he wouldn't come out,
so...
we had to hit him.
We hurt him.
We were terrified.
We didn't know what to do.
That's why we went
to look for help-
Hey, man, I told you...
I'm gonna make a report.
Don't worry about it.
He ain't gonna come back.
Looks like you guys
scared him away pretty good.
I ain't gonna let him
ruin your fun.
Thank you.
My friend's inside right now
and she's pretty freaked out.
She wants to go home.
We all kind of do.
A lady friend, huh?
I bet you like to party...
with the ladies.
Karen: Paul?
Is everything okay?
Howdy, ma'am.
Everything's fine.
Just go back inside,
have yourself a big 40,
just party.
Umm...
okay.
Oh, Daddy, why are you
talking about leaving?
You've got to stay and party.
That's why we came here
in the first place.
I'm telling you,
this is a major party town.
- Really?
- Are you kidding me?
You know what it's like
when you go
to a new town
and you're the new guy?
All the girls see you
walking down the street...
they don't know you've got
five pounds of dangling meat.
They're looking for
no commitment.
- You understand what I'm saying?
- I've heard that theory before.
This is that town.
It's like when I go party
up at Wambusau.
My cousin goes to school there.
When I party at Wambusau,
I know I'm gonna get p*ssy.
Plus the girls there don't know
I'm a deputy.
So I know they're gonna
party hard with me.
Believe me, man,
they do.
That's too bad, I bet you ruled
this town before you had a badge.
Yeah, but a badge
makes you grow up quick.
sh*t, this guy went and did
a number on your ride.
I'm gonna put out an APB.
We're gonna catch this guy.
Yeah, it wasn't totally him.
We hit it too.
But we were trying
to scare him away.
Could you get somebody
up here to fix it?
What do I look like?
An idiot?
I'll have someone up here
by tomorrow afternoon.
You're top priority.
You're the party man.
Do you realize how many
great parties we're gonna have?
Fortune's shining on you.
I know where all
the big parties are at.
Remember, my name is Winston.
You know how to
get a hold of me, right?
- 9-1-1?
- That's it, my man.
- Take it easy.
- Yeah.
Did he say he was gonna
report this sh*t or not?
I think he is.
He didn't make it seem like
we did anything wrong. He said
he'd get a tow truck up here.
- Sounds weird to me.
- The guy was weird.
Once he saw Karen,
he didn't want to leave.
Has Karen left her room yet?
No, she's still sleeping.
I don't know what's up with her.
She wants to get out of here
as soon as she can.
- Puts a kink in your plan, huh?
- What plan?
What plan?
The plan you've been trying
to execute
since eighth grade.
No, there's no plan.
Not anymore.
Whatever.
You guys are funny.
f*cking...
she likes you because you're nice
to her and she's nice to you
because she can control you.
- f*cking, you're nice to her...
- Bert, don't move.
Bert: f*ck.
- It's that freak's dog.
- Should I hit it?
- I don't know.
If you're gonna hit it,
hit it hard.
So where's Grim?
He's out there rotting.
There's some sick sh*t
in the woods and the hermit's
spreading it around.
I'm not waiting for
that deputy to come back.
- Let's get out of here now.
- Should we say something
on our way out, like, "By the way,
we burned some guy alive"?
- Yes.
- No.
- Jeff.
- Fine, we'll tell the cops.
We have to.
They're gonna figure it out.
The deputy knows something happened.
We're the only outsiders.
They're gonna trace it
back to us.
I feel nauseous.
Karen...
How soon can you
get us out of here?
I don't know if
I can fix the car.
I'm thinking I could
make it drivable,
we could drive into town
and tell them what happened.
And that'll be that, right?
But you're gonna have
to watch me with the g*n.
I'm not gonna go out there
with that f*cking dog around.
I need a bath.
Jeff's mom has
the stupidest ideas-
"Let's get a cabin."
So g*y.
Hey.
Hey.
Sorry. I didn't mean
to wake you.
That's okay.
I think Marcy made some chili.
I'm not hungry.
All right, then.
I'll let you go back to sleep.
No, wait.
Stay.
- f*ck.
- Why did you stop?
- Would you sh**t him already?
Don't stop.
Keep working!
- sh**t it!
- If it gets closer, I can hit it.
Just keep working!
Oh my God!
sh*t!
Marcy!
She's got it! She's sick.
Oh no, she's
f*cking got it.
- Oh sh*t.
- I think I'm really sick.
Oh sh*t.
Stay in your f*cking bed!
- Bert, can you help me?
- Calm down.
No! Get the f*ck out!
Everybody out!
- Just get the f*ck out!
- Bert, please!
- Stay in your f*cking bed!
- I'm bleeding.
- Get the f*ck out!
- Calm down!
- Can I go to the bathroom?
Listen, you b*tch!
Get the f*ck in bed!
- Leave her alone!
- Leave her alone!
- f*cking b*tch!
- What the f*ck is your problem?
- She's your f*cking friend!
She's sick!
She's not coming near me!
I'm doing this for you
and all you f*ck!
- Don't leave me!
- Stop it!
- Bert, Bert... calm down.
- Oh God.
- Okay.
What?
f*ck you, guys.
Karen, I'm sorry.
We just don't want to get it.
- I'm going to die in here.
- Paul: No, you're not.
Karen, please.
We're going to get help now.
- What about that guy's dog?
- Someone'll keep watch with the g*n.
We'll bolt the door shut.
Somebody'll be out here.
We won't leave you alone.
I want to go home.
Ah!
- Ah!
Karen?
Karen.
Come on, Karen,
you've got to eat.
Let me know if you need
anything else, okay?
Okay?
Better close the door,
Marcy.
I don't want
to infect everyone.
- Oh God.
- What are you doing?
My friend...
she's very sick.
- You are very sick.
- Oh my God, I'm sorry.
- No, I'm-
- That's my wife in there!
My friend's dying!
We need a phone, please.
- Get the f*ck off my property!
- sh*t!
- Git!
Where have you been?
Did you find anyone?
Well, come on inside.
Marcy made chili.
Nobody's hungry?
- What if Karen used those bowls?
- Jesus! I washed them!
He's right. I'm not gonna eat
until we get back to town.
Jeff: You know, any
of you guys could have it.
I know we checked, but I'm
not gonna sleep near you guys.
So go sleep in the car
and give us all a break.
The car?
That thing's a germ factory!
- I don't even want to ride in it!
- Calm down. I cleaned it.
- So why don't you sleep in it?
- Maybe I will!
You're right. We should
prepare our own meals.
Who am I? I'm melting!
I'm burning!
What's your problem?
You're gonna
burn down this place!
- What?
- You as*h*le!
- f*cking prick!
- Marcy: Stop it!
- Jeff!
- m*therf*cker!
Shut the f*ck up!
Christ!
I can't take it anymore!
Just no more yelling.
We can eat alone,
we can sleep alone. Whatever.
We have to talk to each other.
We have to work together.
Bert, you just lost the bet.
sh*t!
Okay, Karen, he's gone.
We're gonna stay out here
all night for you, all right?
Karen?
f*ck!
Come on, let's go, everybody.
Hurry up!
The Jeep's running.
Jeff, come on!
Come on, Karen.
We've got to go.
I think I've got a fever.
Let's go!
Come on, Jeff,
let's go!
Come on, m*therf*cker!
All right...
put her in the back.
I don't think
we should sit next to her.
f*ck off!
Put her in the front, then.
No, I'm not driving
with her sitting next to me.
I'm driving.
Just get in the f*cking car.
Fine.
Paul: Karen?
Karen, you okay?
- Marcy: Oh God, Karen.
Marcy: We've got to get her
to town. She's gonna die.
Paul:
She's not going anywhere.
Come on.
You guys coming?
Are you nuts?
She just infected the car.
- I'll take my chances, man.
- I can't leave Karen.
- Bert, you don't look so hot.
- I don't feel so hot either.
But the longer we sit here,
the more she lies and rots!
How sick are you?
Did that old guy touch you?
This is f*cking horseshit!
Come on!
- Did he?
- f*ck this, man!
Bert: I'll get her
a f*cking doctor.
Marcy: We should move her
back to the shed.
Oh God, she's bleeding again.
Don't move her.
It's okay, Karen.
We're gonna get help.
- Going somewhere?
- Anywhere but here.
Where the f*ck do you think
you're going?
Jeff?
- Just let him go.
- Jeff!
Jeff!
Don't f*cking
come near me. Stop!
I don't want to get sick.
I don't want any of us getting sick!
But you two f*ck
insist on touching her!
Now she's bleeding
all over both you guys.
So you two can f*cking rot!
But not me!
No f*cking way!
Not me!
as*h*le!
Oh sh*t.
We're all going to get it.
We're all going
to get sick...
and Jeff's in the woods
getting drunk.
Bert's going to get help.
Karen will be fine.
I promise.
It's like being on a plane
when you know
it's going to crash.
Everyone around you
is screaming and yelling,
"We're going down!
We're going down!"
All you really want to do
is grab the person next to you
and f*ck the sh*t out of them
'cause you know you're
gonna be dead soon anyway.
- You don't use condoms?
- Don't worry. I'm healthy.
Oh f*ck!
Hello?
Somebody help! Hello!
What the hell
happened to you?
My friend, she's sick.
- You don't look so good.
- I know.
There's this disease.
I think all my
friends are getting it.
Do you know where
a hospital is around?
Yeah.
Stay right there.
Don't come any closer.
I'll get a doctor.
Bert: Thanks.
Pancakes!
- Pancakes!
- No pancakes.
- Pancakes!
- No pancakes!
Dennis, I told you
to stay on the swing!
Dennis!
f*ck!
God damn it!
What pancakes!
Why did you come here?
Now look what you've done.
I just need a doctor, okay?
Look what you've done
to this poor boy!
- What has he done to you?
- I just need...
a f*cking doctor, man!
I already lost one boy.
I ain't losing another.
What if the doctors
can't fix my boy?
You get my boy sick,
it's the same as k*lling him.
- It's m*rder!
- What?!
You being sick,
that's your problem.
Now Dennis is sick,
that's my problem!
And if I get sick,
that's Lucille's problem.
So we got to stop
the problem.
We got to stop
the problem right now!
Fenster! r*fle!
f*ck you, man!
There are some kids in a cabin.
They got a disease.
They just gave it to Dennis.
We'll need the kit.
Jesus, Paul,
you did a number on my back.
I'm gonna go find Jeff
and we're walking out of here.
- What about Bert?
- I can't wait for him.
- I have to get out of here.
- What about Karen? Paul?
- f*ck!
f*ck!
f*ck! f*ck!
Oh, f*ck!
sh*t.
Up here!
Help me!
- Bert!
- They're coming for you.
- Who? The deputy?
- No, the guy from the store.
I knew these kids were trouble
the minute they stole from Cad.
Good God.
They're doing sacrifices
or something.
This ain't Christian.
Good night, f*ck!
Got him.
Jeff!
Jeff! It's the water!
Wherever you are,
don't drink the water!
Hello?
Jeff?
Jeff!
Jeff?
f*ck!
?? So cheer up,
things will get better... ??
Here, have a big beer.
Come on, drink up.
You've got some sexy hair.
You got sexy shoes, too.
sh*t, what the f*ck
happened to you, man?
The tow truck.
What happened to
the tow truck, Winston?
Oh sh*t.
The f*cking party man.
I'm so f*cking sorry
about the tow truck.
I sent it, it broke down.
I had to get a tow truck
to get that f*cking
tow truck.
What do you need,
you need a ride?
Yeah.
Yeah, a ride would be good.
Radio: Winston!
- Winston, do you copy?
- Yes, sir, I copy.
I'm still looking for
that underage booze party.
Radio: Never mind.
We've got bigger problems.
Some kids up in a cabin
are on a k*lling spree.
There's two,
possibly three casualties.
They are armed and hostile.
Do not go anywhere near them!
They've got some kind of skin virus
that will eat you alive.
So if you do see them,
do not hesitate to sh**t them.
- Do you copy?
- Yes. Can you repeat the last part?
I said, if you see the kids,
just sh**t them on sight!
So, how about that ride?
What the f*ck?
Just sh**t him!
- Hey, I can't.
- You heard the walkie-talkie dude!
- The f*cking g*n is in the car.
- I just want to get into town.
- Why don't you just relax?
- Get away, f*cking fruitcake!
You're not going anyplace!
- f*ck!
- sh*t.
Come on, be cool.
Be cool.
Oh f*ck!
You f*cking idiot!
You just f*cked up the whole
party, you f*cking idiot!
The party's over, Winston.
Man: Son.
We need you to start
from the beginning.
Everybody's dead.
We need to know...
where you got this disease.
It was a guy
from the woods.
Oh God, he looked
like Bert's marshmallow.
Paul: He told me
he would get a tow truck.
I should have k*lled him too.
Doctor: We're not equipped
to handle a situation like this.
Cook County is
his only shot.
Fine.
You put him in the car...
and I'll take care of him.
Hey, look who's waking up!
The f*cking party man!
I guess the party
ain't over, huh?
We have a long night
of partying.
- A long night.
- Water.
- I ain't got no water.
All I got's a 40.
But if you want some water,
I'll find some
for you, okay?
You just sit tight,
I'll take care of you.
Holy sh*t.
They're dead.
My God.
All dead.
I made it.
I made it.
Oh God, I made it.
I did it.
I f*cking made it.
I f*cking made it.
I did it.
I f*cking made it!
I knew it!
I knew it!
I f*cking made it!
I f*cking made it!
I made it!
I f*cking made it!
You got rid
of that other one, right?
Hey, I think there's another one
in the basement.
Come on, boys!
Let's do this!
Hey, fellas!
It's been a rough morning
up here.
Lemonade, mister?
Thanks, son.
Don't mind if I do.
That's five cents.
Businessmen.
You almost take
after your granddad.
Cad: They're running me out
of my own business.
Stealing me blind right here.
Whoa! Now,
that is mighty fine.
Mighty fine. Grab a cup, boys.
This round's on me.
Here you go, all
polished and everything.
Ain't that a beauty?
Look at that, honey.
Looks like it's brand new.
- Hi, my n*gga, how are you?
- What's up, n*gga?
Where you been, man?
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