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02x01 - Speed FrEek/All About Babs

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Eek! The Cat". Aired: September 12, 1992 – August 1, 1997.*
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Revolves around the misadventures of a jolly purple cat named Eek, who lives in the fictitious city of McTropolis.

02x01 - Speed FrEek/All About Babs

Post by bunniefuu »

[Music]

uh yeah

[Music]

[Music]

here comes

[Music]

they're terrible

[Music]

eek

[Music]

gee annabelle it sure is a great day to

watch and learn all about these amazing

machines and i'm sure looking forward to

my favorite stunt out the incredible

elmo do his halftime show go ache me too

elmo is a brave majestic elk

but in the meantime look wilbur the

wonder weasel in his titanic terror

truck

wilbur will attempt the arduous task of

driving over

117 empty soda cans

and wilbur will attempt this feat with

his radio turned completely off

all right she was all jiggly and fat so

i teased her until she started crying

the big whale

[Music]

you are so funny

[Music]

[Music]

now that was some magnificent dragon it

sure was and you know what annabelle we

got a few minutes before the incredible

elmo the elk is gonna race so you want

some cotton candy well no week i'm i'm

watching my blade

really key annabelle i've been watching

your way too and i think you look just

right

why it's the cat you say the sweetest

spice

[Applause]

you're probably right a little snack

like on candy isn't gonna k*ll me i mean

after all it is just cotton you got it

annabelle one cotton candy coming up

oh and while you're down there could you

give me a couple hot dogs your thing

annabelle i'll be right back

and maybe a box of nachos

and a sugar-coated lardstick

and

[Music]

oh yeah there he is the incredible omo

my bunny lies over the ocean my bunny

lies over the sea my body lies over the

ocean oh where can my bonnie's brain be

hello incredible elmo huh

oops sorry incredible elmo hey what the

get me out of here the urban is the hood

release again breathe again

is this it

[Music]

oh here it is

[Music]

oh boy that's smart hey little kitty

thanks for getting me out of there sure

thing incredible elmo boy everybody's so

excited to see your race today do you

think you'll win you betcha i need that

cash prize i'm trying to raise money for

my little brother timmy's brain

operation he thinks he's madonna

[Music]

gee that's tough incredible elmo i hope

you win

ha ha it's in the bag little kitty

there's my opponent look

yes elmo your car sure looks a lot

faster than dakota the terribly

dysfunctional turtles car you betcha

little kitty the incredible elmo has

this race in the bag

[Music]

gee too bad elmo now you won't get to

race

what a lucky break

i mean how sad that fate has robbed me

of a more glorious victory but you know

what they say that's the way the cookie

does that thing there well ladies and

gentlemen with dakota the terribly

dysfunctional turtle's car reduced to a

pathetic heap it looks like the

incredible elmo the elk has won by

default

[Applause]

and so elmo is the new champion wait a

minute watch this

[Applause]

hmm i'm not sure i like the looks of

this it looks like a new challenger has

stepped in to take dakota the terribly

dysfunctional turtle's place

your time is calm elmo after this race i

will be crowned king of the metropolis

speedway i'll see you at the starting

line baby

gosh elmo that guy looks as serious as a

heart attack but i have no doubt a brave

elk like you will give it your all no

matter how deadly the odds you're still

gonna win elmo elmo

elmo

for you

come on incredible elmo we gotta get

your car to the starting line so you can

win the race and pay for little timmy's

operation he appears to be getting worse

well um

you're right little kitty uh and maybe

you can give me a paw yes sure thing

incredible elmo it never hurts to help

uh i've got to check in the tires make

sure there's four of them maybe you

could warm up the seat for me little

kitty you got it incredible elmo

maybe you could uh warm up the seat belt

too

[Music]

and the helmet

racers on your mark get set

i think you better climb in now elbow uh

the race is about to start sure little

kitty let me just toss in my lucky brick

[Music]

[Music]

there's brave elmo now to get him back

in the driver's seat

[Music]

elmo hey elmo that elmo is so brave he's

trying to get up enough speed so that he

can get in the car without me shopping

[Music]

excuse me excuse me

[Music]

nice incredible emma will be

disappointed that he didn't get in the

car in time i'll try to pick him up on

my next pass

now you throw out

[Music]

[Music]

curses jack

[Music]

okay incredible elmo she's all yours i

can't i can't i tell you sure you can

elmo no please i'm scared take your

little brother kimmy think of the way he

was only you can bring him back bring

him back bring him back

[Music]

that's it that's it you got it

[Music]

you're right little kitty come along

let's win this race for timmy

[Music]

hello little kitty we're out of petrol

i'm afraid this race is over don't give

up elmo it's not over till someone rolls

the fat lady across the finish line

while she's singing or something

well nothing's going to stop that from

happening now

squash those cans like they was butter

yo stupid weso

[Applause]

[Music]

i have done it i have gained back my

self-respect and now i can help timmy

it's incredible what you can do when you

just believe in yourself

[Applause]

i've never heard

[Music]

we're still not sure we really

understand how this squishy thing is

going to help us catch those crafty

humans central galapagos it is not your

duty to understand

however just to be nice i will have dr

steggy attempt to explain it to you

since thank goodness we can't seem to

locate any human females yet by

replicating the dna of the two known

male humans as close as our computers

can theorize we have duplicated these

beings ex-chromosome all female version

of the mankind

we call it the bio-engineered animated

by pad specimen

or babs for short

hello

oh it's so ugly doc

it is horrible yeah cool so generally

you're planning on using this babs thing

to scare the humans to death no you

ignorance or

to us this bab's creature is disgusting

but we are theorizing that the y version

of its species those two elusive

creatures known as mankind will be

attracted to this creature like bait

[Music]

then we grab them and pow we squash them

right guys that is the theory we attach

this homing device we call it a purse it

is an integral part of the bab's unit we

then release the bab's unit into the exo

where it will attract the two dangerous

humans

stand by we are over the exo push out

the crates containing the bab's unit

okay we jump when we see where the wind

causes the crate's deployment parachute

to land

uh parachute dock

[Music]

no i will not go first i am sick

together your stupid ideas you are a

doofus scooter you are a pea brain i

cannot stand spending all my time with

you i want you away from me

you mean that bill yes i may not

okay then

you don't have to tell me twice buddy

i'm gone

okay bill how's this happy now

no

i am not happy scooter i will not be

happy until you are gone and i find some

other human being preferably a human

with the brain matter already inserted

into their skull someone i conduct oh

someone like

you

that's great bill i knew we could make

up and be best pals maybe mr grumpy just

needs a hug

[Music]

what are you i i'm a babs i fell from

the sky oh yes i guess you did hi hi i'm

bill and you're beautiful

bill look out behind you it's a giant

bug it's slapping its horrible wing by

your head run away

that's not a bug really that's scooter

hi babs boy are we happy to see you we

were afraid that bill and i were the

only two humans on earth well i guess

you were wrong scooter as of now bill

and i are the only two humans on earth

[Music]

this is terrible the babs unit is loose

thank goodness we put that monitoring

device on her

bad news guys

[Music]

we better find her man this will be

difficult look at these tracks they seem

to go in circles probably to confuse us

yeah she's changing her mind like it's a

prerogative or something

this badge is loose and i have a very

bad feeling about it yeah doc two humans

was bad enough but three what could be

worse

now feeling that the terrible thunder

lizards are already bowing before me

thunder lizards bow to no one

[Applause]

yes what is it happy time bone brain

[Music]

hey who turned out the lights

[Music]

you know scooter may be adult but i kind

of worry about leaving him alone i mean

the guy is helpless and afraid without

me there to protect him

relax bill whatever it is i'll take care

of it i've got this

[Music]

you've got a lot to learn

that's enough squad

yeah please stop

can't take it

yeah we gotta find that babs unit before

something really bad happens uh cutter

would a massive deployment of

thug-as*ault reinforcements alerted to

their comrades t*rture cries constitutes

something really bad

yeah squad i believe that scenario would

fit nicely into the really bad category

[Music]

[Applause]

but i want it and it's way over there

bill

please babs don't be upset you you know

if i could i'd go across the river to

get that fruit but this river is full of

cavemen eating piranhas

now now bill will womankind have to

teach you silly mankind types everything

look bill it's simple you chop down a

tree like this

[Applause]

and look it floats

wow

we'll call the floating device a ship

okay get in bill we'll load up the ship

with fruit and voila

we'll take our ship full of things back

across the water to our home okay now

you try it

see bill we're using tools we're

chopping and shipping but then together

we've invented shopping we're making

progress as womankind oh that would be a

mankind wouldn't it

no it wouldn't sweetheart

[Applause]

[Music]

lost those boneheads

there they are bless them

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

good plan cutter yes wonderful we are

rocketing over the side of a cliff at

the velocity of

4 000 miles an hour so now what cutter

oh well gee doc here's the funny funny

part you see i only thought this thing

out so far and then uh

the thinking stopped

[Music]

grab the rubber fruit

[Music]

all right see guys we look at those

stupid thong saws

well cutter i wouldn't be so quick to

jump to conclusions

[Music]

by finding me a piece of driftwood to

beat you in

[Music]

bill

you're back

how's babs she's gone scooter she left

me she gave me this dear john letter she

never even got my name right gee

she says she's convinced there must be

something out there smarter and easier

to get along with than mankind like

primates or darter snails

gee that's tough bill but there'll be

more babs i'm sure of it and i thought

you'd drive me insane

well i'm glad you're back bill

you're just in time to try out my latest

invention i call it the hairbrush

when does the hurting stop

well fellas we may have misplaced the

babs unit but we did get to humiliate

the thug sores always a good thing but

general galapagos will not be happy till

we have recovered and squashed all the

humans ah relax talk enjoy the ride

we'll get back to business as soon as we

reach the end of the river

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

you