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01x02 - The Reeking Reign of the Head Cheese: Part 1

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Biker Mice from Mars". Aired: September 19, 1993 – February 24, 1996.*
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Show follows three anthropomorphic mice motorcyclists named Throttle, Modo, and Vinnie who escape a w*r on their home planet Mars before arriving to rebel on the Earth against the species that destroyed their homeland and to one day return to Mars.

01x02 - The Reeking Reign of the Head Cheese: Part 1

Post by bunniefuu »

[Music]

your empty head makes you float incoming

[Music]

i'm a bad man

[Applause]

[Music]

man i thought the grand canyon was in

another state one guess where this came

from

[Music]

we're about to get munched

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

battle mode

i'm bros

let's toast that big cheese

sorry child no can do

[Music]

what's the big idea

this is stupid macho guy stuff remember

[Music]

[Music]

quite dirty if you have to funny that

was just what i had in mind

my first taste of real estate and i'm

not sure i like it that's more like it

knocked rock

luke now just stay cool boy don't lose

your head yeah

we ain't gonna let you ruin this planet

the way you're getting mars

you wretched rodents won't be around to

stop me

[Music]

fire me alive

uh why did the chicken cross the road

a tow line shecky oh right i knew that

[Music]

time to bring lindbergh down to earth

i'll go right you go left now split left

no the other left

besides he's safe

[Music]

[Music]

another defeated the pause of those

infernal biker mice

how could this day possibly get worse

this is how

greetings lord camembert it is a

pleasure to see you looking so

repulsive never mind the pleasantries

limburger i shall stay on earth caused

you to forget the traditional plutarchy

and greeting oh please your high

chairmanship couldn't we just dispense

with

limburger may i remind you that i am

your supreme leader now get to it

check to check and stink to sleep

[Music]

you're a worthless failure limburger

earth should have been mine to dust by

now what's taking you so long uh uh a

few delays a few setbacks my union

problems i assure you it's all under

control now it better be because i'm on

my way there personally to pick up the

next shipment of earth resources you

better have something pretty impressive

to deliver

you may rest assured my chairman i will

do not worry

oh

i'm not worried but you'd better be i

want a huge shipment

or else

oh

my wreaking insoles

the high chairman's coming in the person

and he has such impressive ways of

showing his displeasure if i fail

greasepit get in here

[Music]

you wanted to see these buzz

no but sometimes i have to

listen you greasy pawtroon the height

chairman of tuktok is arriving next week

in person

i need to deliver him something really

big in the way of dirt but what can it

be

what can it

of course

chicago i rip up the entire city and

deliver it personally to the high

chairman that will knock his foul

smelling socks off but boss they'll

never let you bite the whole city

[Music]

who said anything about buying

i'm simply going to take it

the city of chicago and the biker mice

soon both will be gone forever

[Music]

this is it city hall doors open quick

get your helmets on

let's go

smile rattle we're on candid camera hi

mom

knock knock

what is the meaning of this the meaning

of this is that you're coming for a

little ride with us mr mayor but first

say cheese

that's it let's get out of here

film at 11.

[Music]

and that was motorbrain bros with their

latest release next up more metal noise

with speed buggy

wow that's my kind of charging music

he's up he shoots

ellie

[Music]

can i tell you boys raising the hoops

make the game more exciting put that

away no g*ns sh**t i thought the next

game was going to be a real blast

sweetheart we were jamming to that not

anymore listen to this

authorities have confirmed that mayor

wes weekley was kidnapped last night

from his office at city hall the mayor's

been kidnapped hey this kind of thing

could make me mad wait that's not all

this video security camera was able to

record the felons in the act they appear

to be bikers hey that looks like me now

i'm really mad we're being framed that's

greasepit in the moto suit fortunately

the city's leading citizen lawrence

limberger has stepped in to serve as

acting mayor no way the big cheese is

now head cheese that makes me more than

just mad

now

[Music]

hello

fellow citizens of chicago i'm in charge

here

and as your new acting mayor rest

assured that i shall not let these

mysteries go unpunished

my newly appointed chief of police is

under orders to have them arrested on

site man i knew politics was a stinky

business but i never thought it'd reek

like this it's no joke moto limburger's

now mayor and he's got the police after

you you guys are in trouble not as much

trouble as he's in it's time to whip

some tail now just a minute but once i

agree with vinnie guys the mayor

shouldn't we rescue the mayor first time

enough for that after we make limburger

into a rotten cheese omelet let's

[Music]

rock typical guys writing off to save

the world by blowing up everything in

sight meanwhile i have to do the real

work finding out what limburger's up to

there's the roads now let's bust their

tails all right you schools make like

the fuzz and whale

[Music]

uh-oh a cop no not a real cop that's

grease pit and his g*ons let's lose him

it's time to rock

[Music]

fair chicago

crown jewel of the midwest

now i am your mayor and soon you shall

be gone

[Music]

are you ready to teleport in a new

assistant

[Music]

then do it

[Music]

[Music]

i hate when they do that

we're here

now let's play this smooth and subtle

anybody got a plan i say we blast our

way in smash everything in sight blow

car buckle through a wall and then grab

limb burger and pound his face until he

releases the bear

smooth subtle

i like it

[Music]

ah

good of you to pop in vermin

as the acting mayor i've just finished

ordering your destruction

oh me too me too

shut up snuffball

dr carbuncle would you please introduce

our guest to our newest business

associate

[Laughter]

your thick sliciness

biker mice from mars meet electromagnet

electromag

why don't you demonstrate your magnetic

powers

no

[Music]

very good electromagnet but don't keep

our guests in suspense just carry on my

visual order

obliterate them

[Music]

nice office

let's test the construction fighter vice

[Music]

please

[Music]

we've got to get out of here

oop

got it

[Music]

oh yeah that's nice

[Music]

let's ride

[Music]

a shame i can't be there to watch their

inevitable

day no more

but duty calls

business before pleasure after all and

it's time to put the next step of my

plan into action

[Music]

miss culpit

come in here

[Music]

you called mr mayor

what is this

you're not miss cole pitt

she quit

something about the stink in here oh is

it noticeable

and now then to business i take a memo

please

yes sir

to the citizens of chicago

as your acting mayor i have decided in

the interest of the public good to

proceed with the digging of a new subway

system unfortunately the local diamond

mart is directly in the way

therefore i'm officially declaring the

diamond mart condemned

demolition will begin immediately

immediately but that's an occupied

building you can't do that

i'm the mayor now remember

chicago is all

[Music]

this is tougher than a motocross race

during a demolition derby more fun too

[Music]

how much father just a head froze

we'll give that magnetic monster a taste

of his own juice

[Music]

of the power line like a nice time to

show you my attractive personality

[Music]

what's happening

it's working all the steel in here is

deferring his magnetic power he needs

more toys let's load him up

[Music]

go

time to wrap this baby up

there

oh hot

it's not funny my lips are a galactic

treasure it would be if you had any

mice with lips what's next chipmunks

that sing

button up and ride

we still gotta make fondue out of the

head cheese

guess again we got more trouble

[Music]

excellent my clan is right on schedule

when the high chairman arrives i will

deliver him the entire city of chicago

so what now uh should i let the mayor go

not yet

[Music]

we still need the power of this office

keep the mayor hostage in the old

scissor warehouse until my plan is

complete

i've got to tell the guys

i thought i heard something a spy yeah

and look who it is it's that thing who's

got a thing for biker mice grab her

[Music]

come back here you forget it mayor

stinkface you're heading for a fall

[Music]

hey there

[Music]

you're destroying property and

endangering people and that makes us mad

you want to rumble we're ready

oh

we're out of here

oh they're running away it's my clint

eastwood squint gets him every time

what is it throttle diamonds limburger's

g*ons were stealing a truck full of

diamonds but why

one thing sure he doesn't need the money

no way he's getting engaged it's a

mystery all right and i've got a feeling

we won't like the answer guys guys

charlie girl

whoa going for a new look it's a

disguise disguise schmeichel i like it

turn around let me see the black will

you climb up and listen to me i know

where lindbergh is hiding the mayor you

do where the old scissor warehouse on

the edge of town the scissor warehouse

time to cut to the chase

we've gotta hurry

you sure this is the place positive i

heard limburger say it himself and we'll

just let my fingers do the knocking

hello

mr mayor sir

i don't like the looks of this place

what looks i can't see nothing

say do you smell grease grease

[Music]

that's police chief griezmann for you

vicomites

oh by the way

uses under arrest

so

[Music]

[Applause]

[Laughter]

[Music]