06x04 - Mo' Linguish - Oops, I Did It Again

[bunniefuu]

Sugar,

spice...

and everything nice.

These were
the ingredients chosen

to create the perfect girl.

But Professor Utonium
accidentally added

an extra ingredient
to the concoction--

Chemical X.

[boom]

Thus the Powerpuff Girls
were born!

Using their ultra-super powers,

Blossom, Bubbles,
and Buttercup

have dedicated their lives
to fighting crime

and the forces of evil!

NARRATOR:
The city of Townsville--

a succinct city
where simple questions

are given simple answers.

Guilty.

What?!

I object!

Which is to say that
I do not agree

with that it is what you say,

which is incorrect,
lacking in proper knowledge

of the truth, and wrong.

Furthermore--
[gavel bangs]

Order!

Due to your obvious failure
for rehabilitation,

I have decided that the best
form of punishment

is for you to give back
to the community

from which you
have taken so much.

Must I pick up garbage?

You, Mojo Jojo,
are hereby sentenced

to teach in a knowledge
extension course

at Townsville community college.

No!

By which, I mean,
I cannot do it.

[bell ringing]

[students murmuring]

[murmuring stops]

Hello and good evening to you.

I am Mojo Jojo, your instructor,

and the person who
will be teaching you

from this point forward.

That is to say that
as you are here representing

the students of the class,

I am here representing
the teacher of the class.

And as it is my job to teach,
it is your job to learn,

and in learning,

gain more intelligence
than you currently have.

Now, what are the names
or individual identifications

that have been assigned
to the lot of you?

- Philippe.
- Italia.

- Enriquez.
- Nadia.

- Ernst.
- Ming.

- Harook.

I see.

Now, as teacher and thus
assigner of the grades

in this class, if I
were to be performing

said grading right now
at this moment

let me tell you that
none of you pass!

[gasping]

That is right.

In the grading system,

I would have assigned
you all with an "F,"

which, if I had control
of the grading system,

I would make the lowest
grade a "Z"

since that is the final
letter in the alphabet

which starts with "A"
and ends with "Z."

But instead, the letter given
for those who do most poorly

is an "F," seeing
as it goes "A," "B,"

"C," "D," "F,"

with the inexplicable
skipping of "E."

Nonetheless, after that
pathetic display,

all of you would get an "F"
symbolizing failure

for your poor use of English.

Pardon, monsieur,

but all you did was
ask of us our names

and that is what we
answered with.

Yes, and that is wrong

because it is boring
and uninteresting

and thoroughly
bringing me about

to a state of unconsciousness.

From those simple, pathetic
names I learned nothing.

I am here to teach you
proper English.

And with that you are to learn

proper descriptive
and defining skills.

Now, let us try this again.

Tell me your names.

Um, my name is Philippe,

which is to say
that upon my birth

my parents Jean-Paul
and Camille

placed upon me this title
which identifies me as me

and separates me
from all the others.

Excellent!

Next.

Si. I am called Italia
after my aunt Tally,

which is shorter and more, um,

casual version of Talia--

often referred to as a nickname,

which is a term of endearment--

The name Harook does not
trip off the tongue lightly.

It is a name of
substance and vigor

for which I am proud
and take much pride.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Now that was some speaking,

and what was spoken
was spoken well.

Class dismissed.

Is the class, which seemed
to just start, really over...

as in done?

Yes, the two hours
allotted as time for class

is now finished,

and the time for leaving
has now begun.

See you tomorrow, which
is the day that will begin

after the passing of
tonight's midnight hour.

NARRATOR:
The city of Townsville!

A succinct city where
simple questions

are given simple answers--

except for...

What's this?

What kind of
a simple question

is that to ask of the woman

to whom you wish to enter
the state of matrimony?

Your question lacks
the complexity

and weight that is apropos

of such a complex
and weighty matter,

and thus makes me question
your true heartfelt feelings

in this serious life decision.

Ketchup or mustard?

Do you mean
would I prefer

the sweet fluid
tomato flavorings

or the smashed, liquefied
mustard seed renderings

enjoyed by most
consumers

upon the hottest of dogs?

Uh, yeah.

Is that dog, which you hold
within the embrace of your arms,

also held within your ownership?

By which I mean are you
the sole caregiver

for this pooch that is
within your personal grasp?

In other words, is that
your schnauzer?

Um, no.

It's my cat in a dog suit.

[dog whines]

Well, then let me tell you...

If that is your simple

and plainly painfully
boring answer...

Then you are in need
of being reeducated by...

Mojo Jojo.

[clamoring]

[bell rings]

[door slams]

[clamoring ends]

Why is my class,
which was previously

merely a few people,
now more than a few--

which equals many?

Because in our speaking of

proper English around
Townsville, sir Mojo,

it became clear to those
previously in the dark

that their English
was inaccurate,

that they must enter the light

accepting that it
is in the hearing,

not in the seeing that this
light has come upon them.

Ah, yes!

Good!

I see!

So, now it begins, starts,
and comes to commencement!

To the masses I must now reach.

And in the reaching,
these classroom walls

cannot confine
my unending grasp.

[buzzing]

Yes, Mayor?

What? Yes, but--where?

There is a stealing of sorts

happening at the place where
money is given and taken,

that is to say deposited
and withdrawn,

and sometimes
redistributed and loaned.

But currently, the taker is
taking that which is not his,

thus performing
an act of illegality

which could result
in incarceration

within the confines
of a penal facility--

that is to say prison,
jail, hoosegow, et cetera.

What's he saying?

I have no idea,

but I think something
bad is happening.

Let's go!

Look!

I don't believe it.

The town's at
a complete standstill.

But why?

Is there an accident?

All I see is that cop
and that old lady.

Let's check it out.

You realize that you were
walking in the crosswalk

after the green walking man
had stopped being displayed

and when the flashing
red hand had become

the prominent visual.

And while I
appreciate the change

in the crosswalk signage,

the fact of the matter is
I am of elderly persuasion.

And due to the deterioration
of calcium level in my bones

my pedestrian abilities,
which is to say my walking,

is of a much slower pace

than the average citizen
of Townsville.

[tea pot whistling]

[honk]

Is this a crime?

No, just annoying.

Maybe the Mayor was
trying to tell you

about a bank robbery.

To the bank!

The amount which
I want to withdraw

is not that from
any bank account

which I hold
within the bank.

In other words,
I wish to take money

that does not belong to me,
but is instead

in the ownership of others
who have worked hard

to gather funds for
their future rainy days.

But what I am asking you is

do you have an account
which I can access,

and if so, what are
the numerical digits

for me to properly type
upon the keyboard

to tap into the computer system

which allows me permission

into all of
the fund-related requests?

And what you are
failing to understand

is that I do not
have said accounts

since I am not a patron of
this fine establishment

except to take from it
that which is not mine.

Is this a stickup?

Seems more like a stuck up.

What the heck
is going on here?

And so I, Mojo Jojo,

impart upon you the empowerment
of Mo' linguish.

Mo' linguish?!

There's the crime!

And with this power,

you will no longer speak
in brief, boring

abbreviated sentences,

but instead will wow the crowds

with your scintillating usage
of an overabundance of nouns,

verbs, adjectives, pronouns,

prepositions, and of course
the conjunction junctions

which have a multiple
of functions.

With the skill of Mo' linguish,

the world, which was previously
not yours to be taken,

will be at your fingertips!

That's it!

He's done it.

Mojo has managed
to bring Townsville

to a complete standstill

by having all
of the people speak

in the most lengthy
of questions

and redundant of answers!

Thus nothing can be
asked or answered

without the verbosity of words

causing the city to
come to a permanent

and most painful halt.

Furthermore--
- Bubbles!

- Bubbles!
- Sorry!

We've got to reprogram
Townsville--

bringing their speech
patterns back to normal.

Come on!

Ma'am, officer,

all this can be solved

by you briefly
stating your point

and moving on.

But if I were
to speak briefly,

it would mean that
I did not speak

all that I wished
to have spoken,

meaning that I would not
fully express myself

to the fullest, and thus spoken
in too small of a sentence

to properly satisfy.

And if I simply
said yes or no,

the reasoning behind
that yes or no

would be unheard and unvoiced

and unpontificated,

thus leaving me with a feeling
of stifled combustion

that would be ready to explode.

Oh, this isn't going to work.

Certainly not if
our wish is to

remedy this situation

which is currently
lacking closure--

- Bubbles!
- Bubbles!

Someone has to reteach them.

But do we know whose
English is good enough

to reverse the effects
of Mo' linguish

and retrain all these people
to speak properly,

thus eliminating
the circular pattern

in which they are speaking?

Darn it! Now I'm doing it.

I can think of only
one in Townsville

who has that power.

Now repeat after me.

The color of the sky is...

Blue.

The color of the grass is...

Green.

The stop sign on
the street is...

Red.

Very good.

Now, let's move on to numbers.

A dozen is...



Well, this is going well.

Do you think Mojo is
really learning his lesson?

Oh, I think he's
learning quite a bit.

The Easter Bunny hides...

Eggs,

which are generally regular eggs

which have been boiled
in the hottest of water

and then decorated in
a vinegar-based dye

by placing--ow!

Keep it brief, buddy.

Eggs.

NARRATOR:
And so once again the day is saved,

because it was a day that
was in need of being saved

due to the previously
unsaved nature of the day.

Thanks and in most
humble gratitude

and that is saying
in much appreciation

to the Powerpuff Girls.

Enough already!

Sorry.

My most humble apologies.

Please forgive me.

As the narrator, that is
to say teller of the story,

I feel like I must provide
a snappy button,

that is a concluding phrase,

to each one of your
action-packed adventures.

Quiet!

NARRATOR:
The city of Townsville.

And it's no accident
that we are at the home

of the Powerpuff Girls.

Girls, time for lunch!

All right!

I can't wait to see
what he makes today.

Hi, girls.

Oh, have you seen
my cooking hat?

Are you ok, Professor?

Oh, I'm fine.

It's just that--oh, no!

I forgot to form the meat
into burger patties.

Oh, just a sec while I
wipe these onion tears off.

Ha ha.

Oh, there we go.

Now, where's my cooking hat?

Oh, there you are!

Wow! That was great,
Professor!

Huh?

Uh, what was that now?

Oh, well, look at that.

They were supposed
to be hamburgers,

but I guess sloppy Joes
are even better.

Gee, Professor,

this is another great
accident you've created.

An accident?

Wh-what do you mean?

Everything great
you've ever created

has been by accident.

- Yeah.
- Uh-huh!

And these are
accidentally fantastic.

By accident?

You mean my inventions are all--

[gasps]

You're right!

All my creations have
been by accident!

You created Dynamo on purpose.

Dynamo.

But you also destroyed
my beautiful city!

Never use that, that...

monstrosity again!

But--but, it's
the Professor's fault.

He made us use it.

But--but it...

gotta go!

[boom]

And you three.

When I tried to create
the perfect little girls,

I accidentally created you.

Oh, dear me.

It is true.

I...I don't know what to say.

Oh, Professor,

lots of inventions were
discovered by accident,

like electricity.

Yeow!

And the telephone.

And let's not forget Velcro.

Oh, wait, aliens gave us that.

Oh, but that's not half
as shocking as realizing

I'm an accidental Professor!

I'm no amazing inventor.

I've never invented anything
good on purpose.

Cheer up, Professor.

If you did everything
on purpose,

you wouldn't have us.

Yeah, imagine how
boring your life would be

if we weren't accidents.

Professor?

Is he gonna finish
his sloppy Joe?

[door creaks]

[computers beeping]

Accidental.

Well, not today!

I'm gonna purposely create
the best invention ever!

Oh! There!

I've done it.

The perfect invention!

[boom]

Oh, who am I kidding?

I'll never invent
anything great on purpose.

I'm just an accidental
Professor.

Lots of inventions were
discovered by accident.

I can't do
anything on purpose.

Imagine how boring
your life would be

if we weren't accidents.

Accidental.

Is he gonna finish
his sloppy Joe?

Purpose...

accidental...

Sugar!

And spice!

These are the ingredients
that were purposely added

to create the perfect
little girls.

And then the Professor
added another ingredient,

everything nice.

[ka-boom]

Pow!

The run of the mill girls
were born.

Using their
ultra-normal abilities,

Bertha, Beatrice, and Betty

have dedicating their lives
to just hanging around

and doing nothing extraordinary.

[snarling]

Hurry, girls!

We don't want to be
late for school...again.

Where are my books?

I don't know what
dress to wear!

Bertha, Bertha, Bertha!

Ok, girls, I'll help out.

Everyone, let's get
into your clothes.

Here we go.

Bertha!

Uh, what are you doing?

Oh, yeah. Anyway.

Just get dressed
so we aren't late.

Hope you're hungry.

Yay!

Plain eggs and white
bread toast!

Nothing but the best
for my special little girls.

I can't wait for school!
It's career day!

I think Joey likes me.

Oh, let's get going, girls.

Oh, wait, I forgot my books!

Hold on!

Ahem!

Hmm.

So, um...

you girls ready for...

another day at school?

Yeah.

Sure.

I got them. Let's go.

I got shotgun!

[horns honking]

Is the traffic being caused
by another giant monster?

Yes. Someone really
should get on that.

Children, today's topic
is career day,

and today's guest is
our very own Mayor.

Yeah, this is so cool!

Oh, it's him.

Well, children,

being Mayor is the most
exciting job in the world!

Let me take you through
a normal day.

Ms. Bellum, my pickles, please!

[straining]

Darn it, I can never
get these things open.

Would anyone like
to help the Mayor?

Oh! Oh! Yeah, me, me.

Pick me! Me! Me!

Oh, I will.

Yes, yes. I do, I do!

Well, ok, normal girls.

Let's see if you've
got what it takes.

[straining]

Ga! Ga! Ga!

[sighs]

[growling]

Nice try.

Let me see that, sweetie.

There you go, Mayor.

Gimme! Gimme!

Oh, precious!

Daddy's got you.

You girls are cute,

but I wouldn't
call on you in a crisis.

How was school today, girls?

Fine, nothing new.

Well, the weekend is here.

And I'm sure we could all use
a couple of relaxing days.

Oh, someone should really
do something about this.

[snarling]

Take that, you evil doer!

Come and get me, punk!

You're no match
for the three of us!

Give up!

Girls, what's going on?

just kicking major butt
on "Save the World III."

Yeah, it's
the newest video game.

Ha ha! Gotcha!

Oh, I thought maybe...

Oh, never mind.

I'll just finish the laundry.

Have fun, and stay safe.

[ringing]

Hello?

Hello, Bubbles?

Uh, no, this is Beatrice.

I'm sorry, wrong number.

[hangs up]

Ok, girls, good night.

I'll be working late tonight
at the lab.

[telephone rings]

Pizza pie laboratory?

Large pepperoni?

You got it!

Hey, how's that medium
mushroom coming?

It's all ready, Jimmy.

[telephone ringing]

Oh, man, is there a better way
to spend Friday night?

Oh, I don't think so, Jimmy.

Man, it's gonna be busy tonight.

Pizza pie laboratory.

You got it, sir.

Man, oh, man,
what an exciting job!

Ha ha!

Well, maybe just a cat nap

before things get really busy.

Professor?

Professor?

Are you ok?

You've been down here
for a while.

Girls!

It's you!

It's really you!

Oh, you're floating,
you have big eyes,

no fingers, and superpowers!

Yep, he finally cracked.

Oh, I'm so glad
to see you girls.

I like you the way you are--

and the way I am,

even if I can only invent
things by accident.

[ka-boom]

Wow, Professor!

That's the best thing
you've ever invented!

The world will
be a better place.

Oops, I did it again.

[laughter]

NARRATOR:
And so once again,
the real day is saved,

not the what if on purpose day--

not that that
needed to be saved,

it was pretty run of the mill,

thanks to the Professor!

♪ Blossom,
commander and the leader ♪

♪ Bubbles,
she is the joy and the laughter ♪

♪ Buttercup,
she's the toughest fighter ♪

♪ Powerpuffs save the day ♪

♪ Fighting crime,
trying to save the world ♪

♪ here they come just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

♪ Fighting crime,
trying to save the world ♪

♪ here they come just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

Powerpuff!