03x06 - Binky Gets Cancelled, Again!/U.S. Acres: Orson's Diner/Flat Tired

[bunniefuu]

- Ladies

- Ladies and

- Ladies and gentlemen,

-Garfield and friends.,

- We're...

- We're...

- Ready...

- Ready...

- To...

- To...

- Party!

- ™ª we're ready to party ♪

™ª we're ready ♪

- ™ª I hope you bring ♪

™ª lots of spaghetti ♪

™ª come on in ♪

™ª come to the place ♪

™ª where fun never ends ♪

™ª come on in ♪

™ª it's time to party ♪

™ª with garfield and friends ♪

™ª dancing ♪ fiesta!

™ª romancing ♪ siesta!

™ª samba ♪ la bamba!

Ay carumba!

Disguises!

- Disguises!

- Surprises!

- Surprises!

- And pies of...

- And pies of all sizes! Ha ha!

™ª come on in ♪

™ª come to the place ♪

™ª where fun never ends ♪

™ª come on in ♪

™ª it's time to party ♪

™ª with garfield and friends ♪

™ª come on in ♪

™ª it's time to party ♪

™ª with garfield and friends ♪

™ª garfield and friends ♪

- Today's show

Is brought to you by

The letter k and the number 9.

- Here, boy. There's something

Very special about odie.

That wasn't what was special.

Now, that was special.

- I have a sad tale to tell

You today, folks.

It's about binky the clown.

Want to hear it?

If you don't, we don't have

Much of an episode here.

Okay.

It all started a few weeks ago.

Binky was the number one

Kids show host in town

Until one day...

- Hey!

Station manager!

- Binky, parents are

Complaining that your show

Isn't educational.

- My show is very educational!

- Oh, really? Just what is it

Your show teaches children?

I mean, besides that.

- I make children laugh!

I entertain!

- Well, that's not good enough

Anymore.

We need social content.

We need educational value.

We need the buddy bears.

- Buddy bears?

- That's right.

Come on in, boys.

- ™ª oh, we are ♪

™ª the buddy bears ♪

™ª we always get along ♪

媻 each day we do
a little dance ♪

™ª and sing a little song ♪

™ª if you ever disagree ♪

™ª it means that you are wrong ♪

™ª oh, we are the buddy bears ♪

™ª we always get along ♪

- [ Laughs ]

That was terrific, boys.

- [ All agreeing ]

- Binky was horrified,

As who wouldn't be?

And he was even

More horrified to hear--

- I'm giving them your time

Slot, clown.

Do you understand

What I'm saying?

Guess you do.

- [ Crying ]

- But we'll find some other

Show for you.

Now, you see?

That's the kind of anti-social

Cruel humor we're trying

To get rid of.

- [ All agree ]

- The station manager tried

Hard to find another show

For binky.

- And now the evening news

With binky the clown.

- Hey, news fans!

Our top story,

A nine-year-old boy

Today swallowed a frog.

The boy's reported doing well.

He hasn't croaked yet.

[ Laughs ]

Let's go to the weather.

Any chance of rain?

- None whatsoever, binky.

- That's what you think.

[ Laughs ]

- They tried everything.

For a while, he even hosted

The wrestling matches.

The wrestlers complained he was

So loud, they couldn't study

Their scripts.

- [ Punching ] ooh! Ow! Ooh!

Don't do that! Ow! Ooh! Ow!

- Hey, wrestling fans.

- Finally they gave him

A polite, dignified farewell.

[ Crash ]

- You can imagine my shock

One day when I got a small snack

And sat down to watch binky

Only to find--

- ™ª oh, we are ♪

™ª the buddy bears ♪

™ª we never have a fight ♪

™ª anyone who disagrees ♪

™ª is never, ever right ♪

™ª if you have a point of view ♪

™ª then keep it out of sight ♪

™ª oh, we are the buddy bears ♪

™ª we never have a fight ♪

- On today's show, we are

Going to teach educational

Things.

- Like how to weave baskets

And how to name pigeons.

- But most of all, we're going

To teach you how to be sweet

And nice and always agree

With everyone.

- Well, folks, you know what

It takes to cause me

To lose my appetite.

I had to find out

What happened to binky.

It turned out

There weren't a lot of jobs

Around for clowns,

For a time,

He tried being a chauffeur.

That didn't work out so well.

Then he got a job in a library.

- Hey! Where do these books go?

- That lasted

A good eight minutes.

How pathetic.

Don't worry, binky.

I'll get your show back.

Yeah, every so often,

I do something nice

Just to keep folks off guard.

I tried to talk some sense

Into the buddy bears.

Guys, you don't always

Have to agree on everything.

- [ All agreeing ]

- But what about having

An individual point of view?

- I have an individual

Point of view.

- And I agree with him.

- And I agree

With both of them.

- [ Together ] we all have

An individual point of view.

- The buddy bears

Were driving me bananas.

I knew there had to be

Some way to get them to stop

Agreeing so much.

Then I got an idea.

- Get set. You're on the air

In one minute.

- Scusi. I'm-a the caterer.

We're having a pizza for lunch.

What would you boys like

On your pizza?

- Pepperoni and mushrooms.

- Anchovies and pineapple.

- Sausage and black olives.

- What do you mean?

- Pepperoni and mushrooms?

- Anchovies?

- In the history of mankind,

No two people have ever been

Able to agree on pizza toppings.

- Bears on the air

In 3, 2, 1.

- Yes, I'm proud to say

That we got rid of that bad

Influence binky the clown,

And we replaced him

With a sweeter, more

Educational show for children.

Here they are, the buddy bears.

- [ All arguing ]

- What an appalling display,

Arguing like that,

And over pizza!

- Stupid argument. Everyone

Knows you put meatballs

And peppers on pizza.

- You mean onions

And canadian bacon.

- No, you're both wrong.

You need your tuna fish

And extra cheese.

- No, no, no, meatballs

And peppers.

- [ All arguing ]

- Oh, it's those buddy bears'

Fault!

I got to get binky back!

- Binky had decided to do what

So many clowns eventually do:

He was running

For public office.

The station manager

Begged him to come back to

His old show, and he said yes.

Actually, he said...

- Yes!

[ Crash ]

- So binky got his own show

Back and everyone wound up

Happy, sort of.

Yeah, you're wondering what

Happened to the buddy bears.

Well, while jon's away,

I needed someone to cook,

So I hired them.

Guys, it's dinnertime.

- ™ª oh, we are ♪

™ª the buddy bears ♪

™ª we never disagree ♪

™ª if we say it's dinnertime ♪

™ª it certainly must be ♪

™ª we'll feed you 100 pounds ♪

™ª with happiness and glee ♪

™ª oh, we are the buddy bears ♪

™ª we never disagree ♪

- Now some things,

It's good to never argue about.

[ Blows bugle ]

- Wow! 100%. Not bad.

What's the matter, guys?

Heads stuck in the roof?

Let me give you

A helping foot.

[ Laughs ]

I haven't had so much fun

Since i--wahoo!

- Oh, poor roy.

He fell into the waller.

- Guess we'd better

Clean him up.

- Okay, okay. We're even.

- But you're not dry.

- Will this do?

- Oh boy.

- "A pictorial history

Of pictorial histories."

"How to be your own

Best friend's best friend."

"Dã©jã  vu: the sensation

"That you are doing something

You have done before."

"Dã©jã  vu: the sensation

"That you are doing something

You have done before."

"Dã©jã  vu: the sensation

"That you are doing something

You have done before."

""Dã©jã  vu: the sensation that--

- Putting your books away,

Huh, orson? [ Laughs ]

Nothing gets by me.

- These are old books.

I don't have any money

For new ones.

- Well, don't look at me.

I can't even afford

A new steel-belted radial

Life preserver.

- I wish we had some way

To earn extra money.

"How to start

Your own restaurant."

Hmm. What do you think?

- We could start

Our own eating establishment

And make a fortune.

- This book will tell us

How to do it.

Let me put a few more away,

And then we'll get to it.

"Dã©jã  vu: the sensation

"That you are doing something

You have done before."

"Dã©jã  vu: the sensa--"

Dã©jã  vu, dã©jã  vu, dã©jã  vu,
dã©jã  vu, dã©jã  vu, dã©jã  vu,

Dã©jã  vu, dã©jã  vu--

™ª got a counter ♪

™ª and some dishes ♪

™ª and a cook anything cookbook ♪

™ª got a pencil ♪

™ª to take an order ♪

媻 'cause anything
you want, we cook ♪

™ª just take a little time ♪

™ª to stop in and dine ♪

™ª and try our specialties ♪

™ª our barbecued ice cream ♪

™ª our baked bees knees ♪

™ª you won't leave hungry ♪

™ª 'cause we want to please ♪

™ª it's a delightful ♪

™ª little diner ♪

™ª and the service here ♪

™ª is really swell ♪

™ª get a smile with your order ♪

™ª add a fly in your soup ♪

™ª as well ♪

™ª will I get the best ♪

™ª if we're put to the test ♪

™ª and the customer ♪

™ª is satisfied ♪

™ª hey, then we can say ♪

™ª the food here's okay ♪

™ª 'cause the customer ♪

™ª hasn't died ♪

I'm just kiddin'.

The food's great.

Now all we need is a customer.

- I knew there was a catch.

- Here comes our first

Customer now.

Good afternoon, sir.

- Hmm? Oh, you mean me?

Oh, well, let me see a menu.

- Oh, here at orson's diner,

We don't bother with menus.

Our kitchen is fully stocked.

- You name it, we'll make it.

- If you can order something

We can't fix,

You eat free for a month.

- Free for a month if I can

Order something you can't fix?

- That is the offer.

- Boy, what a way to win

Mucho free food.

All right, I'll have

A dish of moose stew

With chocolate sauce.

- Moose stew with chocolate

Sauce coming right up.

One moose stew

With chocolate sauce.

- One moose stew

With chocolate sauce.

- Ooh, what a cinch.

They wouldn't have the makings

Of moose stew. They--

- One moose stew

With chocolate sauce.

You know, most people

Prefer their moose stew

With raspberry sauce.

- Okay. For my next course,

I would like an order

Of broiled yak nose

With green gravy.

- One order of broiled

Yak nose with green gravy.

One order of broiled yak nose

With green gravy.

- One order of broiled

Yak nose with green gravy.

- Will there be anything else?

- Yes, I want an alligator

Cheese sandwich made with

Cheese from an alligator

Named sydney.

I want it with lettuce

Grown in northern bolivia

And picked on memorial day.

I want it served on rye bread

With exactly 71 caraway seeds

Per slice, and I want a pickle

In the shape of muncie,

Indiana. [ Laughs ]

- Very good. One number eight.

- One number eight.

- Roy, roy, are you okay?

- [ Moans ]

I'll try one more time.

Give me an elephant foot

Sandwich with mustard.

- One elephant foot sandwich

With mustard.

- One elephant foot sandwich

With mustard.

- [ Laughs ]

Orson, could I see you

For a moment out back?

- Sure thing.

- Orson, we don't have

Any elephant feet.

- [ Gasps ] no elephant feet?

- We'll have to give roy

Free food for a month.

- We're not giving up

This quickly.

Maybe we can still find

Some elephant feet.

Come on.

- [ Humming ]

- Where do you find

Elephant feet?

- On an elephant, mayhaps?

- No elephant in here.

- Nor here.

- No elephant here.

- Nor under here.

- Mort, do you have

Elephant's feet?

- No, I always walk this way.

[ Crash ]

- Ooh, that'll be tender

For days.

- Wade, we have to face it.

There are no elephants

In these parts.

- Well, what did you expect?

Did you think that a passing

Circus truck would blow a tire

And their elephant would escape?

[ Horn honks ]

- Hey, driver!

We have a flat tire!

- Anything can happen

In a cartoon.

- Let's try and drive on it

To the next gas station.

- We did it!

We got an elephant!

- Yes, but we can't put

His feet in a sandwich.

- Ah, I see what you mean.

He is kind of cute.

- [ Trumpets ]

- Scary, too.

- The circus will eventually

Miss him, and they'll come back

For him.

We'll take care of him

In the meantime.

- Yeah, what are we going

To do about roy's sandwich?

- I think we're going to have

To pay him off, but I have an

Idea that'll make it worth it.

Well, roy. You win.

We can't fill your order

For an elephant foot sandwich

With mustard,

So you get meals for a month.

- Ha! I knew it.

Didn't have any elephant

Back there, huh?

- Oh, we have plenty

Of elephant.

We're just out of mustard.

[ Thud ]

- [ Trumpets ]

- [ Snoring ]

[ Yawns ]

Ooh, what a great nap.

That was one of the best naps

I've ever had.

Great nap.

Maybe a tad too long, though.

And now hold onto your sandals

Because it's time for
"screaming with binky"

We're at the bottom

Of the ocean

Where binky the clown

Has been drafted for underwater

Exploration because I guess

They weren't too worried

About losing him.

- Hey, fish!

- We'll be back in a moment

On dry land.

[ Snoring ]

- Garfield?

Garfield?

- Oh, it's the director.

What do you want?

- We're waiting

For the cartoon to start.

- Good. Let me know

How it turns out.

- Garfield!

- Yikes!

- Camera three,

Pan over and find him.

- I'm up here.

Well, now we know where nermal

Learned that trick.

- Sorry to disturb you, but we

Need to get this cartoon going.

- First of all, I'm too tired.

[ Crash ]

Secondly, I am injured.

- Garfield, if you're not

Willing to perform, we'll just

Have to find someone else

For this cartoon.

- Knock yourself out.

[ Yawns ]

- All right. Fine.

Have it your way.

We'll get someone else.

Now, who we can we get?

- Ahem.

- We'll need someone

Who can act.

- [ Barking ]

- And it would be nice if they

Were musical.

And of course,

They have to be funny.

I know who we can get.

Get me kermit the frog

On the phone.

- [ Whimpers ]

- I'm kidding, odie.

You want the job?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Okay, let's start

This one over. Roll tape.

Stand by with a title card.

In 3, 2, 1, action.

[ Humming ]

Hmm.

[ Whimpers ]

- Boy, what an exciting

Cartoon so far.

[ Yawns ]

- Land sake, I dropped my purse

And you brought it back

To me, little doggie.

Oh, you're a nice little doggie,

You are.

- Uh-huh.

- Come back to my house

With me.

I'll reward you

With a nice juicy steak.

- It's dangerous to accept

Invitations from strangers.

Someone would have to be

Pretty stupid to say yes.

Odie will go with her.

- What do you say?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Told you.

- Right this way,

Little doggie.

- This is about as exciting

As watching cheese age.

I'm going to change the channel

And see what else is on.

[ g*nshots ]

- Seen this already.

- Hey, kids!

- I'm not that desperate.

Hmm, educational program.

Oh, well.

Might as well watch this

And see what happens.

- Here we are, doggie, home.

Now you make yourself at home

While I change.

- She'll probably turn out

To be a wicked old witch

Or something.

- [ Evil laugh ]

- Hey, can I call them or what?

- I hate little doggies,

So I'll turn you into a toad.

No, worse, a snake.

No, even worse.

I'll turn you into the most

Unspeakable, disgusting

Creature in the world.

- She's going to turn odie

Into a top 40 disc jockey.

Oh, well, it's not my cartoon.

It's not my problem.

- Where are you going, puppy?

Don't you know

You can't get away from me?

- [ Yelps ]

- Now, then,

What shall I turn you into?

- Hee hee hee! That's too easy.

I'm going to turn you

Into a gerbil.

- Huh?

- It's like a hamster.

- Hmm.

[ Whimpers ]

- I know. You're thinking

What could be worse

Than being a gerbil?

- Uh-huh.

- A gerbil sandwich!

- Oh, no!

- Well, so much for the pup.

He probably thought it'd be fun

To have his own cartoon.

- Garfield.

- Go away.

I'm not in this episode.

- Garfield, aren't you

Going to do anything?

- Yeah, I'm going to do

Something.

[ Snoring ]

Oh, all right.

I better get guest star money

For this, though.

- Mustard, lettuce,

Tomato, onion.

- Uh-uh.

- Okay. Hold the onion.

[ Knock on door ]

- Oh, now who could that be?

Oh, for me? [ Laughs ]

Thank you.

Come back sometime and I'll

Turn you into an aardvark.

Wonder what this is.

- Ta-da! Excusez-moi, madame.

- [ Caws ]

- Well, like the man said,

Here's another nice mess

You've gotten yourself into.

- [ Barks ]

- Let's go home, fella.

- [ Barks ]

- Oh, you're wondering

How I got inside the box.

- Uh-huh.

- Don't ask me.

It's your cartoon.

- Hmm.