05x04 - Burglar Alarmed - Shotgun Wedding

[bunniefuu]

Sugar,

spice...

and everything nice.

These were
the ingredients chosen

to create
the perfect little girl.

But Professor Utonium
accidentally added

an extra ingredient
to the concoction--

Chemical X.

[expl*si*n]

Thus the Powerpuff Girls
were born!

Using their ultra-superpowers,

Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup
have dedicated their lives

to fighting crime
and the forces of evil!

NARRATOR:
Shh.

The city of Townsville,

where it's the end of a quiet,
peaceful, crime-free day,

which means that it's bedtime

for our beloved heroes
the Powerpuff Girls.

Yes, it's time for
Professor Utonium

to tuck in our tuckered-out
little super tots.

Ahem.

Time for Professor Utonium
to tuck in

our tuckered-out little
super tots.

It's time to
tuck us in, Professor!

Ohh.
What's keeping him?

[snoring]

Oh, no.

Preparing for his big
dissertation tomorrow

has worn him out.

Why don't we tuck him in
for a change?

That's a good idea!

Shh.

We have to make sure

that he really gets
a good night's rest.

Oh, what a
little sweetie.

[baby talk]

Night-night,
Professor.

Don't let the
bedbugs bite.

NARRATOR:
So now, with
the tuckered-out Professor

tucked in tight
by our little super tots,

it's the end of a quiet,
peaceful, crime-free day.

[floorboard creaking]

Thanks.

Welcome.

[yawning]

Bubbles?

Yes, Blossom?

You ok?

Yeah. I just needed
a glass of milk.

The nice man
taking things

in the kitchen
helped me get it.

Ahh.

What nice man taking things
in the kitchen?

The nice
burglar man?

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Your eyes must be
playing tricks on you.

I mean, what burglar
in their right mind

would try to rob
the Powerpuff Girls? Ha ha!

[crash]

I can't believe it!

Someone is actually trying
to rob the Powerpuff Girls.

Come on, let's make
some noise, girls.

No, Buttercup,
wait.

We can't.

The Professor
needs his sleep

for his dissertation
tomorrow, remember?

[snoring, mumbling]

Look, this person,
whoever he is,

is obviously just lost
and/or confused.

I'm sure that if we go
explain to him who we are

and what kind of trouble
he could get into,

he'll understand
and leave quietly.



Pardon me, mister,
but I don't think

you completely understand
where you are.

Are you lost?

BURGLAR:




Oh, I get it.
I know what you want.

No worries. There's
plenty for everyone--

one for you
and one for you.

Um, yeah.

Listen, sir,
are you aware of who--

Tut, tut, tut.
Let's not get greedy, now.

Let's go.
Off to bed with you.

Little girls need
their beauty sleep.

Nighty-night.
Don't let the bedbugs bite.

BUBBLES:
Do you think
he's still confused?

[humming]

Aww, what a cutie.

Mr. Burglar,
so far I think we've been

more than patient with you.

Ha ha ha ha!
Ah ha ha ha ha!

[whistling]

Uh...You know what?

I suddenly realized
that I...

have another appointment
down the street.

So, uh, why don't I
just go ahead

and take what
I already have?

You kids can
keep the rest,

and we'll
call it even.

You know what I think?

I think that you don't have
another appointment.

Hee hee hee!
You're right. You got me.

No appointment.
It's the train.

I have to catch
the 2:30 train.

There is no Townsville


Yeah, well, I really
should be going, anyway.

But, Mr. Burglar,
you just got here.

[burglar screaming]

Cabbage!

[mumbling]

What...

Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh,
oh, my gosh!

Kumquat!

Mr. Burglie-man?
Yoo-hoo!

Don't be afraid.
There's no need to panic.

He's gone.

Where'd he go?

He has to be
here somewhere.

Maybe he's upstairs.

BUBBLES:
Yeah, let's go upstairs.

Peek-a-boo!
I see you.

Aah!

He's down here,
girls.

[screaming]

[panting]

Those girls
are mutants.

I don't have
a chance against them--

superpower strength,
telekinetic levitation,

laser-beam eyeballs...

Ah, here we go.

Click.

I sure picked
the wrong house to rob.

You sure did.

Aaah!

Mr. Burglar man, we're not
going to tell you again.

Would you please
keep it down?

Yeah!

BUTTERCUP:
There he goes.

BLOSSOM:
What's he doing?

BUTTERCUP:
Good work, Bubbles.

BUBBLES:
Oh, no, he's getting away!

Ohh! Now
where is he?

[panting]

[snoring]

Mr. Burglie-man,
come out.

Come out, come out,
Mr. Burglie-man.

I've had it with
this lame villain.

He's just not worth
all this trouble.

Besides, I bet he's
long-gone already.

But, Buttercup, don't you think
we need to be

absolutely sure
that he's gone for good?

Buttercup,
did you hear me?

[stammering]

Buttercup?

Buttercup,
what's the matter?

[gasp]
[gasp]

B-B-Burglie-man.

One step closer,
you genetic freaks,

and I scream
your daddy's head off.

You wouldn't dare.

One more step!

I'll do it.
I swear I will.

I'll scream so loud,
it'll, it'll...

it'll scare him
really bad.

Then you'll get
in trouble.

No. Please, Mr. Burglar,
leave him alone.

H-H-He's tired.

Tired? He's tired?
What about me?

I've been running around

trapped inside this
freak show all night.

I'm the one
that's tired.

Don't you dare
scream.

I'm gonna do it.

No. Don't,
Mr. Burglar.

[taking deep breath]

GIRLS:
Whoo-hoo! Way to go,
Professor! Way to go!

Crackers.

[snoring]

NARRATOR:
Ha ha ha!

I'm not sure dear old Professor
knows just what he did,

but if there's one thing
he knows for sure,

it's not wise to try
and rob the Powerpuff Girls.

And stay out!

NARRATOR:
Ahem. So, like I was
saying earlier,

before all of
this nonsense began,

it's the end of a not-so-quiet,
not-so-peaceful,

not so crime-free day.

Whoa! Cha-ching!

NARRATOR:
Oh, boy.

I feel sorry for this guy.
I really do.

And so, once again,
the night is saved,

thanks to
the Powerpuff Girls!

- Shh! - Shh!
- Shh!

Sorry.

PROFESSOR:
The city of Townsville

is filled with the most vile
and strange villains

to walk the earth.

But as scientifically inexplicable
as some may seem,

each has an obvious
origin.

Enormous one-celled
organisms;

common chimpanzee, mutated
by a mysterious chemical;

supernatural manifestation
of pure evil;

teenaged hoodlums

with a strange form
of adolescent skin condition;

hot chick with chemically
enhanced hair products.

But one--one villain
defies explanation;

the only creature
that leaves me baffled:

The Lumpkin.

Can it be an unaccounted-for
species of bear?

Or is it the infamous
Sasquatch--

or in laymen's term,
Bigfoot?

Or better yet,

is it the sought-after
missing link?

One thing is certain...

it must be studied.

Day one of
my study of the Lumpkin.

This, I believe,

is the natural habitat
of the Lumpkin.

I can only hope
to catch a glim--

Oh, look! What luck!

The Lumpkin is in its territory
and appears to be grooming.

[gargling]

And what's this?

He's adorning himself
with some sort of garment.

Oh, simply fascinating.

He seems to be exhibiting
signs of intelligence.

[pig grunting]

Oh, no!

[roaring]

How fascinating.
Let's see how he reacts.

[roaring]

The creature chases after
the small animal

like a predator
on the hunt.

[pig squealing]

Get back here,
you dirty...

But the Lumpkin
is no match for the pig.

[panting]

[squealing]

Aah! Oof!

It sees something.

Interesting.

It seems to be fond of
this inanimate object.

[buzzing]

Ooh, and look,
it's protecting it.

Wait! The Lumpkin
senses something.

Oh, some poor,
unsuspecting creature

must have stumbled into
the Lumpkin's territory.

Oh, surely
it will be mauled.

What kind of stupid, unevolved,
pea-brained critter

would walk right into
such a horrible fate?

[gasp]
It's me.

[roaring]

[crash]

[Professor panting, gasping]

Aah!

He's out there.
I know he's out there.

He's gonna find me
sooner or later.

To my girls:
take care of yourselves.

And always remember,
the world needs you.

Oh, no!

It's been a few hours now,

and there's been no sign
of the creature.

I think I may have
lost him.

I don't know
how much longer I can last.

I--I've got to
keep moving.

I must figure out
how to get home from here.

Wait. That tree--

it looks like there's
something written on it.

Oh, please, no.

[panting and gasping]

Almost got it...
There.

The battery was all
that needed changing.

According to the map,
just beyond those bushes

should be the road
back to the city.

Oh, soon it'll
all be over.

This nightmare will end,
and I'll be home...

free...

Nooooooooo!

[Fuzzy laughing]

[roaring]

No! Stay back!
Stay back!

[crash]

Aah!

Ugh. Ow!

Ohhh!

Oof!

Eeewww.
The creature's nest.

[Fuzzy growling]

What's that?

They's nowhere to run.

And they ain't nowhere
to hide, neither!

There ain't no
turnin' back.

[whimpering]

Uh, well, howdy, miss.

I... thought you was
someone else.

'Scuse me.

I picked these for you
from outside.

[moaning]

And, you know...

I don't remember
seeing you around here.

And I'd remember, too,
'cause we don't usually

get folks as pretty
as you around...here.

Ah ha ha ha!

Huh?

Um, I, uh...

[stammering]

What the heck is that?

What?!

Hey, everybody!
I'm gettin' hitched!

Hoo-hoo!

Yeee-he!

[Fuzzy's voice echoing]

That's right,
cousins.

I have landed
the Lumpkin of my dreams.

[groaning]

Wha...

and I am gonna marry
this here little Lumpkinette

as soon as possible.
Whoo-hoo.

Aaaaah! Heeeeeelp!

GIRLS:
The Professor!

It sounds like it's coming
from the woods.

Let's go.

[moaning]

FUZZY:
I am so nervous.

It's my first ever
weddin', you know.

And ain't nothin'
gonna ruin this day.

Oh...

[whimpering]

Now, where's my
beautiful bride?

[bluegrass playing]

Now, don't be shy there,
Mrs. Fuzzy Lumpkin.

Yeah, we wouldn't
want you to be late

for your own weddin'
and whatnot.

Girls, where are you?!

Goodness, look at
all the Lumpkinses.

Do you think the Professor's
down there?

There's only one way
to find out.

Dearly beloved...

Ohhh!

Aaaaah!

We are gathered 'round
yonder here today...

Oww!

To join together
yon Fuzzy...

and this here girly
in holy matrimony.

- Aah! - Aah!
- Oww!

Fuzzy, does y'all take

this purty young thing
for your wifey?

Boy howdy!

- Aah! - Ow!
- Oww!

And does the little lady take
Fuzzy for her lovin' man?

Uh...

- Ohh! - Aah!

Come on, girls.

There's just one
really ugly one left.

Oooh! Aah! Oof!

We got all the Lumpkins,
but where's the Professor?

[Professor moaning]

GIRLS:
Professor!

Oh, no!

Are you
ok?

We're so
sorry.

It's ok. It's ok.
I'm all right.

But we hit you
really hard.

Yes, well,
I can think of

much worse things
that could have happened.

Hey!
Leave my wifey alone!

Can't you see
we's in love?

Oh, no.

Don't worry,
Professor.

We'll protect you.

[growling]

You'll never
take her!

Y'all can't stop
true love!

Ha ha ha!
Yee-ha!

Huh? Eewww.

[moaning]

Final analysis:

Lumpkins, above all things,
are stupid.

On a side note,

never speak of
this incident again.

FUZZY:
Boy Howdy!

Mmm. Ahh!

Boy, a few more seconds,

and Fuzzy would have been
our mom.

You mean
our dad.

Yeah, and Professor
would have been our mom.

[girls giggling]

I said, never speak
of it again!

NARRATOR:
So, once again,
the day has done been saved

thanks to them thar
Powerpuff Gals!

Y'all come back now, hear?

♪ Blossom,
commander and the leader ♪

♪ Bubbles,
she is the joy and the laughter ♪

♪ Buttercup,
she's the toughest fighter ♪

♪ Powerpuffs save the day ♪

♪ Fighting crime ♪

♪ trying to save
the world ♪

♪ here they come, just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

♪ Fighting crime,
trying to save the world ♪

♪ here they come,
just in time ♪

♪ the Powerpuff Girls ♪

Powerpuff!