01x41 - #BreakingNews

[bunniefuu]

♪ Whoo! ♪
[title music]

♪ When super me
Becomes super we ♪

♪ Suddenly, magically
Pretty automatically ♪

♪ Crushing it side by side ♪

♪ Look out, world
We're Super Hero Girls ♪

♪ Now that we're together
Gonna get that super life! ♪

♪ Wow! ♪

[all gasp]

[people screaming]

- [thud]
- [gasps]

[screeches]

- [crowd cheering]
- [cameras clicking]

[phone ringing]

Come on, Olsen,
I asked for a scoop

and you bring me vanilla.

Super Hero Girls save the day?

It's as stale as the half
donut under my desk!

I am angling for a spot
at the Daily Planet here, kid.

What I need is a story
that will wow 'em.

Something riveting.
Something... spectacular.

Something...

Not that.

What?

[gasps] You might be
on to something, Olsen.

What if it's not about
covering the Super Hero Girls?

What if it's about
uncovering them?

Big deal. Lois Lane writes
stories about us all the time.

You don't understand.

She's really good, you guys.

If she wants to uncover
our secret identities,

she won't stop until she does.

Everyone will know who we are.

All eyes will be on us
at all times.

We'll never have any privacy.
News outlets outside our doors,

evildoers following
our every move.

- And when our parents find out...
- [slurps]

...we're gonna be in
so much trouble, you guys.

No, no, no.

[breathing heavily]

I'm too much of a nobody
to be that kind of a somebody.

[Kara] Calm down.

We've been doing this
for ages now.

Nobody is going to figure out
who we are.

Not even Lois Lane.

Got the pudding...

now for the proof.

- Zee Zatara!
- [gasps]

Got time for a few questions?

- Uh...
- About the amazing magic show?

Oh! [chuckles]
Well,

what I'm doing isn't just
a magic show.

It's a performance,

that artfully blends
divination, transfiguration

and conjuration
with a dash of incantation

to create a unique
and surreal experience.

Great, great.
And where were you

on the night Sweet Justice
was destroyed?

Oh! I was there
with all my friends.

You know, the super [hesitatingly] friends
that I... have. [chuckles nervously]

My friends who are super...
and totally normal.

[shrieks]

I'm feeling better.

I haven't needed this
for almost an hour.

Jess! You were right
about Lois.

She's a word wizard
whose unassuming charms

nearly match my own.
She's totally on to us!

Ah!

This is bad.

We can't let her talk
to anyone else.

- Yeah, agreed.
- [hyperventilating]

She can't out us
if she can't...

Good gravy!
She's talking to Hal!

Oh! Oh, that's Hal.

H-A-L. Jordon.
J-O-R-D-O-N.

Uh, pretty sure it's an A-N.

It is?

- Sorry.
- School stuff.

What did she ask you?
What did she say?

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

I don't believe in violence.

But I'm willing to
make an exception.

Chill, ladies.

All she did was ask me
some very pointed questions

about the Zad incident.
And I told her she should

talk to Barry, because he is the
real storyteller in the group.

Oh, hey!
Did you know that it's J-O-R-D-A-N?

Then she asked about
my job at Sweet Justice,

which was nice 'cause
people know I work there

but no one really
asks about it, you know?

And then she asked if I was
there when it got destroyed,

which I totally was.
And it was the same day

I met the Super Hero Girls and
you guys at, you guessed it...

Sweet Justice!
Small world, huh?

Barry...

did you tell Lois we were
at Sweet Justice

right before the Super
Hero Girls showed up?

[chuckles softly]

That is a great question.

And I don't remember.

But Lois wrote it all down very
fast, so you can maybe ask her?

[hyperventilating]

You guys, Lois is definitely
on our tails.

Yeah.

Oh! [scoffs] Please!
You're just being paranoid.

It's not like she's out there
watching our every move.

[pops]

[gasps] I recognize that stare.

It's a classic, "I'm trying to put the
pieces together" detective stare.

Quick, you guys,
nobody move!

[pencil scratching]

That didn't work.
Everybody move.

That didn't work either. Run!

[electricity crackling]

[all] Bathroom!

You'll need the pass.

[moth screeching]

[crowd clamoring]

[Barbara] Argh! I can't believe
I left evidence behind.

Such a rookie move. From now
on, we eat all food wrappers!

Um, does anyone think
we should do something about

all these... mobs that
keep showing up?

Priorities please, Karen!

What should we do about Lois?

Hey, Zee, isn't there some
kind of mind webbing spell

that could erase
Lois' memory?

[gasps] Yes, yes, there is.

But... I don't know it.

It's like super hard.

I got an idea.

Not every problem can be
punched into space, Kara.

Oh.

We must stop running
from the problem

and face it directly.

No space punching.
Something much more cunning.

Greetings, Lois Lane.
'Tis I, Diana Prince.

Hark! Across the street!

Is that Wonder Woman?

[grunting]

I am pleased
to be all the way over here

to witness Her Majesty.

[moth screeches]

Yeah!

Whoo-hoo!

I needed
that space punch so bad!

[chuckles] Now,
why are we still here?

A good reporter always
investigates the scene of a crime.

So when Lois shows up after our
fight looking for evidence,

instead she'll find the false
evidence I planted, and realize

we are not
Super Hero Girls.

And that somebody else is.

[sniffs]

This was Barbara Gordon.

[grumbles]
How is she this good?

We got to get that book.

[buzzing]

[grunts]

Did you get it?

Yeah.

Ha! Without whatever
she has been scribbling,

she'll never have the evidence
to dis...

[all gasp]

[sighs and thuds]

[Jessica] We have failed.

Why didn't you warn us
about her, Jess?

I did, like a zillion times.

Oh, what a surprise.
There she is.

Once she publishes that story,
everyone will know who we are.

Our normal lives will be over.

This is our final taste of
Sweet Justice as ordinary,

world of man adolescence.

May we take solace
in our tasty treats.

[chomping]

[Karen] Well, I guess I'll have to find
a new town to be unappreciated in.

- [people clamoring]
- [gasps]

- [growls]
- [people screaming]

[Zatanna speaks indistinctly]

Everyone will see my tricks
are just real magic.

[groans]

My Batman dreams are over.

I could never work for someone who
can't keep a secret identity.

[growls]

Um, guys?

[Jessica] And I'll have
to leave this space sector

to Hal Jordan, who can't even
spell his own name.

We are all doomed!

Guys!

[people screaming]

[all gasp]

[people screaming]

[all gasp]

Maybe if we just wait
a little bit,

some other superhero
will handle it.

[reporter on TV]
Breaking news.

k*ller moth and its army
of moth-monsters

have invaded Metropolis.

As of this hour, no superhero team
has yet stepped up to save us

from this swarm
of vicious invaders.

[moth screeching]

[Lois yells]

[glass squeaking]

[growls]

[screeches]

[roars]

Bingo.

[keyboard clacking]

[slurping]

Daily Planet internship,

here I come.

[exhales deeply]

[school bell ringing]

[Karen] Ahh!

- [blows]
- [Barbara whistles nonchalantly]

[gasps] Did you see her
not seeing us?

Yeah. There was no eye contact.

That's more what I'm used to.

Yeah! We did it, gals.

We totally got her
off our tail.

- Huzzah!
- We did it!

Keep walking, Lane.

Ah, dummies.

Superman, eh?

Expose that guy and you got
yourself the scoop of scoops.

[reading]

[scoffs] Enjoy your time
at the Daily Planet, Kent.

I'm coming for you next.