01x11 - Citizen Ghost

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ If there's something strange ♪

♪ In the neighborhood

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ If there's something weird ♪

♪ And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you gonna call?

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

[sign buzzing]

Hello?

Anyone there?

[Janine] Back here.

Oh, you must be Janine Melnitz.

Well, if I must, I must.

Though all things considered,
I'd rather be Meryl Streep.

But then, wouldn't we all?

Uh, wait a minute.

Can we start this over again?

I'm Cynthia Crawford with UBN News.

I'm here to interview Dr. Peter Venkman.

Oh, of course.

He's waiting for you upstairs.

Thank you.

I'm sorry,but you can't go up there.

-But you just said...
-I know what I said,

but you can't go up there.

Thirty, 29, 28...

Look, I don't know what your game is,
but I'm a reporter.

I have an interview with Dr. Venkman

and I'm going up there, all right?

Thirteen, 12, 11, 10...

Are you listening to a word I'm saying?

Four, three, two, one.

[exploding]

There.

Now you can go upstairs.

[sighs]

Nice one, Egon.

I think you took out
most of Bayonne with that one.

Would you like to try
for the Bronx this time?

Hey, I was born in the Bronx.

[Peter] I'd say that was a good
enough reason, wouldn't you?

Ouch!

You know, I wish you guys would figure out
what this thing's supposed to be.

If I'm gonna be disintegrated,

I'd at least like to know by what.

[Cynthia] Hello?

Uh, hi.

I-I'm Cynthia Crawford, with UBN News.

You must be Dr. Peter Venkman.

Well, if I must, I must.
But I'd much rather be...

If you don't mind, I've already driven off
that bridge once already.

Uh, can we go somewhere and talk?

Sorry, gentlemen, but my public calls.

Perhaps we can continue this later. Ta.

[Peter] And then in third grade,

I got in a fight with this guy named Rick.

Big guy. Big muscles.

Brains of a trout.

Dr. Venkman,

when I said I wanted to do a pre-interview

for a segment on the history
of the Ghostbusters,

this isn't quite what I had in mind.

I mean, there's so much the public
doesn't know about you...

What you do in your spare time,
where you came from.

Not much to say.

Ray's home is in the Bronx.

[expl*si*n]

Make that, was in the Bronx.

[gasps]

Hello.

[stammering]
And this must be Slimer.

Well, if I must...

Skip it, Slimer. She's heard it.

[sighs]

And that's another thing.

Isn't it a bit strange for
a bunch of Ghostbusters

to have a ghost living with them?

Strange, weird, eccentric, sick.

That about covers it.
[clears throat]

But there are some good reasons.

Some very, very good reasons
why he's here.

It all happened right after
our biggest case.

[Peter] We'd just stopped
Gozer the Gozerian

from Fl*ttening the world,

though too late
to save our headquarters.

No two ways about it,
this place is a mess.

Hey, no problem.

We'll just fix the place up
better than before. Right?

[Winston] Yeah, right. Sure.
Piece of cake.

The second order of business
is to rebuild the containment grid

so we'll have someplace to put the ghosts.

This time I think I'll make it bigger.

[Peter] OK, Egon, I'll bite.

What's the first thing we have to do?

Get rid of our uniforms.

They absorbed a frightening amount
of psychokinetic energy

during our battle with Gozer.
They'll have to be destroyed.

[Janine]
Hey, guys, you're in luck.

In all the confusion,
I forgot to tell you.

This came in just before
you went up to fight Gozer.

[blowing]

It's your new uniforms.

-Great, huh?
-[Egon] They'll do.

I suggest you all change
as quickly as possible.

The sooner we're away
from the PKE contamination, the better.

[Peter] That was where
all the trouble started.

We're not entirely sure
what happened next.

But here's what we pieced together.

-[Egon] Transtator?
-[Peter] Check.

-[Egon] Field generator?
-[Peter] Check.

-[Egon] Ionization decay meter?
-[Peter] Check.

Plasmatic refractor?

Anti-ectoplasm destruct mechanism?

Bipolar adjuster?

Check, check and...

Check.

-Trans warp drive?
-Check.

Aha! Caught you.
We don't have a trans warp drive.

If we don't have one,
then it can't malfunction.

If it's not malfunctioning,
then nothing's wrong.

And if nothing's wrong,
then it checks, right?

I'm not going to talk to you
again for at least a week.

It's not good for me.

Hey, don't make fun.

This is how I got through college.

[Egon] By the way, Peter,

did you remember to burn
those old uniforms like I asked you?

Oh, yeah. Sure. No problem.

Gotta remember to take
care of this stuff later.

[Peter] We never figured how,

but our uniforms,
with all that left over ghost energy

got stored next to the containment unit.

Worse yet, there was one last crack
in the containment field

we hadn't found yet.

Energy was seeping out steadily,

and the old uniforms absorbed it.

After a while, we forgot about it
in the rush to rebuild the firehouse,

but we had the strangest feeling...

[Ray whistling]

Like we were being watched.

Then, finally, we found out who it was.

Gentlemen, Janine, a toast...

To our first night back in the firehouse.

-To the firehouse.
-[all] To the firehouse!

Food.

[Slimer] Mmm. Yum, yum.

So, who wants stuffing?

Oh, yum, yum.

Stuffing.

What the heck is that?

Can't be the plumbing.
I just fixed it.

Gentlemen, something's here,

[beeping]

And it's right over there.

[laughing]

Oh, boy!

[muttering gibberish]

It's him. It's the one
who slimed me at the hotel.

Get him!

Huh?

Ah!

[theme music playing]

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

He's over here.
Get him.

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

[Peter] Winston, you and Ray go after him.
He's under Janine's desk.

Egon and I will get him
if he tries to come upstairs.

Check.
Check.

[mumbling]

There he is.
Get him.

[shrieks]

-We lost him.
-No problem.

He'll show up again.
Right, Egon?

Probably. It's curious, though.

When the containment unit exploded,

he should've escaped
with the rest of the ghosts.

But he decided to stay here. Why?

Free food?

He wants another shot at me, that's all.

Maybe he's just lonely.

And you guys are the first people
who ever paid any attention to him.

[all] Nah.

[Peter] Whatever the reason,

we ended up seeing a lot of Slimer
over the next few days.

Naturally, we all reacted to Slimer
in our own unique ways.

[beeping]

[squeals]

[talking gibberish]

My name is Dr. Egon Spengler.
I'm a scientist.

If you don't mind,
I'd like to study you.

Huh?

Me?

You could be of tremendous use to science

since I can't study the other ghosts
in the containment unit up close.

Hmm...

Now, if you'll just open wide,
this won't hurt a bit.

Now, say "Ah."

Oh.

Ah.

That...That will be all.

Thank you.

What happened to him?

-[Ray] Crescent wrench.
-Crescent wrench.

-Ratchet.
-Ratchet.

Hi.

Huh?

[mumbling]

-[kettle boiling]
-[Winston] Tea's up.

-Be right back.
-What?

Screwdriver.

Screwdriver?

Oh, what will I do?

Wait a minute. This isn't...

Hi, Ray.

Hi there, little fella.

You know, with a little training,

I bet you could become
a first-rate mechanic.

Yeah. I'll bet I could train you
to do all kinds of stuff.

All kinds of stuff.

Fetch.

I got it. I got it. I got it.

There he is, Ray.

See? I told you.

He tried to sneak up on me.

OK, where is he?
Where'd he go?

Where did who go, Peter?

You know, the green guy. The little spud.
The...Whatever he is.

Who? What? Where?

[Peter] Never mind.
Just keep your eyes open.

-That thing's a menace.
-You know, Peter's right.

We need to give you a name.

Just to annoy Peter,
what say we call you...

-Slimer.
-Slimer?

[chuckling]

[Peter] What we didn't know, of course,

was that there was an even bigger menace
growing right beneath our noses.

[snoring]

Oh, come on, Peter.
Cut it out. I'm trying to get some sleep.

I mean it, Peter.
Cut it...Huh?

Oh, guys. I think we've got trouble here.

Big, big trouble.

-Hey, can't we talk this over?
-[Winston] Move.

[Egon] Come on! Whoa!

♪ With my love ♪

["Driving Me Crazy" by Tahiti playing]

♪ Let me charge you up ♪

♪ Charge you, charge you, charge you up ♪

What's all the noise about?

Janine.

Oh, Egon, you saved me.

Don't go. Stay here
with me where it's safe.

I think I'd better go.

Story of my life.

♪ When you're around ♪

♪ I feel the ground ♪

♪ Right underneath my feet baby ♪

I think I've got their positions.
Aim around the fire pole, 6-foot radius.

You've got it.

♪The best of me I see ♪

[Peter] We got them on the run. Let's go.

♪ All I see ♪

Over there. The window.

We're too late.
We'll never catch them now.

It might be just as well.

We shouldn't go after them
until we know what we're dealing with.

What we're dealing with is us.

Those things look just like us.

Speak for yourself, Ray.
I couldn't look that bad on a bet.

Perhaps,
but they were in our old uniforms.

How is that possible?

They were destroyed, weren't they?

[Peter] It didn't take long for us
to figure out what had happened.

As I suspected.

The uniforms, already filled

with ectoplasmic energy
from our battle with Gozer

absorbed even more energy
from the containment unit.

Ectoplasm is like putty.
The more you add, the bigger it gets.

It was only a matter of time until it,
well, literally woke up and walked away.

But why did they look like us?

When you touch something,

you leave a mental imprint,
like a fingerprint.

How did this mess happen anyway?

[laughs nervously]

[Peter] Naturally we agreed
it was nobody's fault.

It was just one of those things.

We didn't see them again for several days.

During that time,
it was business as usual.

We had almost forgotten
about them, until one day...

OK, ghosties.

Olly, olly, oxen free.

Come on out.

Dr. Venkman prescribes a nice long nap
in the containment unit.

Whoa!

Hey. Who's the wise guy?

[in automated voice]
My name is Dr. Peter Venkman.

No way. I'm Dr. Peter Venkman, got that?

This town's only big enough
for one Peter Venkman.

I agree.

So one of us must go.

Aah! Why do I say things like that?

I always get in trouble.

[ghost laughing]

What was that?

[Winston ghost] Your destiny.

Surrender. It is the only
logical thing to do.

[Peter] Get in.

We'd better move.

My double lost track of me
in the expl*si*n, but he'll catch up fast.

But where's Ray?

[panting] This is nuts.

[Peter] All aboard.

[Peter] Yeah, it was worse
than we thought.

Bad enough we had four specters
that looked like us,

they wanted to be us.

And the only way they could do that
was get rid of the originals... us.

[Egon] So the problem as I see it,
is that right now both sides are equal.

We have Proton Packs,

they have packs that sh**t out
a very destructive ectoplasm.

Yeah.

Man, this job was a lot easier
when these things didn't sh**t back.

So how do we defeat things
that are armed as we are?

Who know what we know?
Who are in fact our doubles?

[Egon] I have two ideas.

First, we can try to disarm them,

but I don't know
if their packs can be removed.

The second alternative is tougher.

They absorbed our energy
to take on our forms,

so logically, if we remove that energy,
they'll disappear.

And there's one final danger to consider.

[Winston] Let me guess.

Since these guys are just like us,

they might think of the same thing.

Exactly.

Why do I have the feeling that
I'm not going to have any fun in all this?

-[engine starting]
-Hey!

Hey. I just tuned that.

Our Proton Packs are in there.

So let's get them.

Maybe you ought to think that over.

[in low voice]

Egon, over there.
The spare Proton Pack.

It's our only chance. It would be.

OK, on three.

You guys go that way, I'll get the pack.

One, two, three.

How do I get into these things?

Good work, Peter. I...

Oh, wait.

I just remembered.
It only has half a charge.

Why didn't you mention this earlier?

Well, that'll let us hold them off
for a few minutes.

After that...

[Ray] After that, we've had it.

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

[Egon] Peter, fire at them, quickly.

Keep firing.

Now look at them. Closely.

[Egon] See, each time they fire,
they weaken.

[Ray] Of course.

They're made of ectoplasmic energy.

The more they use, the less they have.

So all we have to do

is get them to keep firing
until they run out of energy.

That's great.

Except I don't think
we're gonna last that long.

[Egon] Unless...

Unless one of us goes out
there to draw their fire.

Weakening them enough
for the rest of us to take them.

[Ray] Whoever does that
might not come back.

So who's gonna be the one to do it?

Who can we afford to lose?

[Peter] Oh, Janine?

Just kidding. Just kidding.

[Janine] Oh, no.
They're coming in.

[Ray] No time left. I'll go.

No, not Ray.

I'll go.

Slimer? What are you...

Slimer, no!

[growling]

[screaming]

[Ray] That's it, Slimer.
Keep moving. Faster.

-Go get them.
-You can do it. That's it.

-You can do it!
-Go!

[Peter] All right.

[Ghostbusters cheering]

Hey, look, it's working.
They're getting weaker.

Way to go, Slimer.

[mumbling]

[Ray] Slimer.

[Peter] Argh!

[Winston] You think Slimer used up
enough of their energy?

[Egon] I don't know,
but I think we're about to find out.

[snarling]

You zapped my little buddy.

[Ray] Say good night fellas,

because the real Ghostbusters
are here to stay.

[all screaming]

We got them. Now the Trap.

[Peter] Winston, my man.
Do it.

[Ray] Got them.

[mumbling]

Ooh, yuck!

Hey, how about that?
He likes you.

That's right, Peter.
And he saved our lives.

So what do you say?
Can we keep him?

He could be
of immense scientific interest, Peter.

Please, please.

OK, OK.

Just don't
tell anybody I said so, OK?

So I, uh, that is the others,
decided to keep Slimer on

for strictly scientific purposes.

The rest, as they say...
is history.

Well, that's quite a tale, Dr. Venkman.

I think I see how to handle my story now.

Thanks ever so much.

Anytime. Anytime.

Bye-bye.

She's crazy about me, you know?

[TV Announcer] And we have a warm front
coming from the north...

I wonder what kind of story it will be.

Yeah. What kind of story can she tell?

I mean, she only interviewed Peter.

What can I say, fellas?

I guess when she saw me,
she saw all she needed.

[Cynthia] And now for our feature story,

the hidden history of the Ghostbusters.

It's a fascinating look at what most of us
may not know about our local heroes.

In particular,
our story tonight is about a real hero,

a Ghostbuster among Ghostbusters.

Aw, shucks.

I refer, of course,

to that unsung member
of the Ghostbusters, Slimer.

[all] Slimer?

I never liked you.

-And this is my popcorn, spud.
-[Slimer groaning]

Oh, well.

Win some, lose some.

[Cynthia] We'll have more on this
and other stories

right after this word from our sponsor.

[theme music playing]