07x24 - Dirk Savage: Mutant Hunter!

[bunniefuu]

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell
Turtle power! ♪

♪ They're the world's
Most fearsome fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
In the half-shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil Shredder
Attacks ♪

♪ These Turtle boys
Don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Splinter taught them to be
Ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads
Donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool but crude ♪
Give me a break.

♪ Michelangelo
Is a party dude ♪
Party!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell ♪

♪ Turtle power! ♪

[♪♪♪]

RAPHAEL:
Jeez, are you sure we have

enough videos and pizzas,
Michelangelo?

We'd better, compadre. We've got
a whole weekend to get through.

LEONARDO:
I had no idea there were so many

bad Japanese monster movies.

Come on.
What do you mean "bad"?

These are immortal
works of art, man.

About
giant vegetables?

Oh, yeah? I'd like to see you

take on Radzilla
the k*ller Radish.

If you'd practice more
and watch TV less,

you could take on
anything.

Uh, guys.

From the looks of things,
I'd say it was a bunch of, uh,

nerds.

Something tells me you boys

don't work for the city,
am I right?

[ALL SCREAM]

You wouldn't hit
a guy with glasses.

No, but then,
those aren't glasses.

They're magnifying lenses.

[PUNCH LANDS]

That'll shut you down.

And this'll really steam you.

NERD 1:
Ah, let's get out of here!

Woah, slick trick,
dude.

I knew these pipes had water
running through them.

But steam?
Oh, sure.

The city delivers millions of
cubic feet of steam every month

for heating, manufacturing...

I always knew this show
was educational.

Dudes,
check it out.

"Opening tomorrow,

the most exciting amusement park
in the world: Combat Land."

"Test your skills against
the greatest robot warriors

in history and beyond."

Whoa. I'd sure like
to check that out.

As much as you guys
duck practice,

I can't see why you'd want
to test your skills

against those robots.

Hey, we pull
our fair share, Leonardo.

Maybe more than you think.

MAN:
There are three main zones

here at Combat Land:

The Shogun Zone, where you can
test your martial arts mastery

against samurais and ninjas,

the Medieval Zone, where you can
pit your metal

against valiant knights

and the Future Zone,
where we are now,

where it's your job
to clean up the streets

of these cyber warriors.

It all sounds
awfully dangerous.

Not at all.

These robots would blow
a circuit

before they'd harm anyone.

The samurai and knights' weapons
are made of soft rubber.

And these blasters sh**t
harmless beams of light.

Yes, but, uh,
don't you have any, uh,

you know, nice rides?

Ah, for non-combatants.

We have this boat ride,

which travels between
the various zones.

This story will generate
a lot of publicity

for tomorrow's
grand opening.

Actually, the park
may not open tomorrow.

The robots haven't been
fully tested yet.

Why not?

I haven't found anyone

with the combat skills

to give them
a thorough workout.

April, if the park
doesn't open tomorrow,

there goes your story.

Um, Mr. Stressbar,

I think I know some guys

who could give your robots
a super workout.

Yes?

MICHELANGELO:
All right,

now for some serious
sci-fi and scarfing.

You guys should be practicing.

Hey, didn't we just get through
kicking nerds out of the sewers?

But haven't you noticed we've
been doing a lot of that lately?

You know,
he's right.

This is the third time
we've caught somebody

messing around with the sewers
this month.

Yeah. That's probably
coincidence.

Yeah. What jerkazoid
in his right mind

would wanna to sabotage
the sewers?

[TURTLECOM BEEPS]
APRIL: Guys, it's April.

The new Combat Land
amusement park is opening.

How would you like to be
the first guests?

Would we?

Whoa,
we're there.

[SIGHS]
You don't wanna practice,

but you do wanna go
fight robots. Fine.

This isn't practice,
Leonardo, this is fun.

APRIL:
This is Horatio Stressbar,

the developer of Combat Land.

And this is Denton Nulcet,
our chief robotics engineer.

Hello. Oh, dear,
forgive me.

I'm afraid you're going to have
to give us those weapons.

Our ninja code won't let us
surrender our weapons.

Tsk, tsk. That's a pity,
because our safety code

doesn't permit real weapons
in Combat Land.

Whoa, looks like we got
no choice, dudes.

Great. From heroes
to guinea pigs.

You'll be given special harmless
weapons for fighting the robots.

April,
I don't like this.

The turtles should not be
giving up their weapons.

Irma, you're just being
a worrywart.

I'm telling you, there's
a real story going on here.

I'm going to get the other
minicam and find it.

I'm going to the Shogun Zone

for some good old-fashioned
ninja action.

Who's with me?

Sorry, dude.

I wanna nail some knights
in the Medieval Zone.

And Raphael and I wanna
check out the Future Zone.

But don't you wanna get in touch
with our ninja heritage?

Oh, please.

Why dwell in the past when
you can explore the future?

Fine. I don't need
your help anyway.

In fact, I'll do better
without you.

[PUNCHES LAND]

Dishonorable dog.
You dare challenge our shogun?

I'd like to see the other guys
beat that score.

[♪♪♪]

[GRUNTS]

Ah, these robots
are wimps.

[FOOTSTEPS RUMBLING]
Uh-oh!

You have fought well
against my loyal subjects.

But you will never defeat
the shogun.

Boy, this guy's good.

Yeah! Oh, no, they've
got us cornered.

How's this for some
fancy sh**ting, huh?

[BEEPING]

The humans
are defeating us.

The cyber leader
will destroy them.

So the last
two humans left alive.

[SCOFFS]
We ain't human, bub.

He's programmed
to say that.

Soon there will be
no humans,

only we cyber warriors.

NULCET:
Oh, my, these turtles are good.

But my robots are better.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Golden mongoose.

I knew there was something
strange going on here.

Golden mongoose.

I said,
golden mongoose.

Have you completely
lost your mind?

STRESSBAR:
These reporters

are taking their job
too seriously.

They must be dealt with.

Now, this is just my speed.

A nice, non-violent ride.

Hey!

[VERNON SCREAMS]

How about you,

and all that
Middle Ages-type stuff?

Whoa, these dudes
are pushovers.

BLACK KNIGHT:
h*, knave.

Who dares enter
the Black Knight's domain?

I do, you varlet dude.

[WHINNIES]

Hey, you're not supposed
to have real weapons.

[GRUNTS]

Where did you dudes
come from?

Hey, what's going on here?

Suddenly, this amusement park
isn't so amusing.

[♪♪♪]

Oh, man,

this is the weirdest theme park
attraction I've ever seen.

COMPUTER:
Analysis of subject complete.

Thank you.

Commence
robotic duplication.

You may release him.

Well, this turtle
is taken on.

[g*n c*ck]

Going somewhere?

Terrific.

The Revenge
of the Nerds Part 9.

Boy, those robots
can really fight.

I'll say. It was like
me and Raphael

were in the middle of
a science-fiction movie.

Hey, have you guys
seen Irma or Vernon?

No. And where's
Michelangelo?

Maybe he's still
in the Medieval Zone.

[♪♪♪]

DONATELLO:
Gee, there's no sign
of him anywhere.

He's gotta be
around here somewhere.

Oh, that goofball
probably went

straight for the nearest
pizza stand.

But Vernon and Irma
are missing too.

Now I'm starting
to get worried.

Relax, Leonardo,
it's a big park.

They could be anywhere.

Hey, wait up!

Will you knock it off?

Oh, boy, am I glad
to see you guys.

Irma,
where have you been?

We thought something
happened to you.

I was doing some investigating
on my own, okay?

I saw something really weird
a little while ago.

What was it?

I saw some guy

approach a door
behind this castle.

And when he said--

Whoa!

APRIL:
Irma!

Something is very wrong here.

So how are we
gonna stop them?

We only have these
stupid fake weapons.

Guys! Behind you!

[TURTLES SCREAM]

Oh, what in the world's
going to become of me?

Vernon.
They got you too, huh?

I'm going to be trapped here
for the rest of my life.

I just know it.

Yeah, well, as long
as we're stuck here

I'll continue sh**ting
my hard-hitting documentary.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Uh, so, Vernon,

uh, you seem to be cracking

under the strain of captivity.
Is this correct?

What utter nonsense.

I could tear down that door
with my bare hands.

But it's...
too much bother.

STRESSBAR:
Cut out that talk.

I've got my eye on you.

Ah! Yes, sir!

I'm beginning to get the feeling
this whole thing was a trap.

Well, how are we gonna stop
these mechanized maniacs?

LEONARDO:
We'll just have to improvise.

Come on, Donatello.

As Michelangelo would say,
uh, if he were here,

cowabunga!

[♪♪♪]

How about you?

Gesundheit.

[WHOOPS, GRUNTS]

[BODY THUDS]

[GRUNTING]

[g*nshots]

I hate to say it,

but these robots don't
have many weak spots.

Yeah, I'm barely
putting a dent in them.

We better run for it, guys.

That ought to hold
those guys off.

Yeah, but what
about them?

Gee, they don't seem
to be interested in us.

LEONARDO:
Yeah, they seem to be

interested in something
in the city.

RAPHAEL:
Oh, perfect!

Excuse me, does anyone
have the slightest idea

of what's going on?

Uh-huh. But whatever it is,

it's big.

The first of the duplicate
turtles is complete.

I'll throw the original in
with the other prisoners.

STRESSBAR:
Excellent.

He's a perfect duplicate
in every detail.

And now I can use him

to trap the rest of the
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

and keep them
out of the sewers forever.

LEONARDO:
Donatello, you try

to stop the robots.

I'm gonna find Michelangelo
and the others.

If they really have captured
Michelangelo,

they're probably
keeping him

in the infrastructure
under the park.

I'm on my way.

I don't see a lock.

Ha, not even a door handle.

[TURTLECOM BEEPS]
Michelangelo, come in.

Donatello,
do you read me?

[WHITE NOISE BLARES]

Oh, something must be
jamming our frequency.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Ooh!

[GRUNTS]

Whoa!

[GRUNTS]

[LEONARDO PANTING]

Maybe I lost him.

The shogun.

[HORSE WHINNIES]

[TIRES SQUEAL]

[GRUNTS]

All the ninja skill in the world

isn't gonna stop those robots.

[SIGHS]
What I really need is--

Is the other fellas.

Michelangelo!

Oh, buddy,
am I glad to see you.

Uh, Michelangelo?

[GRUNTS]

Michelangelo!

What are you doing?

RAPHAEL:
We better follow them on foot.

April, go see what you can
dig up on Horatio Stressbar.

He's gotta be
the mastermind behind this.

Okay, I'll check
the newsroom files.

[ENGINE STARTS]
[TIRES SQUEAL]

Hey, what's with these black
boxes they have on their chests?

DONATELLO:
I'm not sure,

but they look frighteningly
like timer devices.

RAPHAEL:
Whoa!

[SPUTTERS]

Jeez, these guys
are built like tanks.

Hey, it stopped.

Great. Now all we need is
another hundred or so

trash barrels and we can
stop the rest of them.

Let's see if he'll start again
if I remove it.

I'd say that's
a good guess.

DONATELLO:
Those robots

are walking time bombs.

Look!

They're heading into the sewers.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

DONATELLO:
Those robots are
walking time bombs.

Yeah, and they're gonna
blow up the sewers.

We've gotta get
to the lair. Come on.

[SIGHS]
The second turtle

has been duplicated.

And the expl*sive robots
are heading into the sewers.

And when they've blown
the sewers to pieces,

the city will have to give me
the contract to repair them.

Twenty million in cash.
Up front!

You can't sell your services

unless you create a demand
for them.

NULCET:
And with the turtles
out of the way,

the sewers will be
just the beginning.

I can use my robots
to sabotage bridges,

knock down buildings,
wreck the subways.

We'll have every
major contract in the city.

We'll make billions!

[BOTH LAUGH]

Okay, I got
our spare weapons.

[TURTLECOM BEEPS]

APRIL:
Guys, I've got something.

Lay it on us, April.

Horatio Stressbar has petitioned
the city for a contract

to reconstruct the sewers
three times in the past month.

Yeah, so, what's
so strange about that?

The sewers are in
perfect condition.

They don't need
reconstruction.

They will when
those bombs go off.

Then Stressbar
must have been

behind all those sabotage
attempts we thwarted.

He's trying to get a fat QC
construction contract

by blowing up the sewers.

I would call that a slightly
unethical business practice,

wouldn't you?

Oh, man, those robots
are everywhere.

How are we gonna stop them?

Like this.

RAPHAEL:
They're all leaving the sewers.

How'd you do that?

Oh, simple.

Remember how that
one robot stopped

when I put a trash can
on its head?

Yeah, I just saw
it the flashback.

Well, that tipped me off that
the robots were being controlled

by radio waves
from the park.

The metal in the can interfered
with the transmission.

So I set up my own
radio gear

to penetrate the frequency
and control the robots.

I've ordered them
to return to Combat Land.

Well, that's swell, Donatello,
but our friends are there.

We gotta get them out.

Yeah, and we've gotta shut down

the park's master control.

When those robots get near it,

its signal will override
my controller.

Okay, okay, fine. We can
chat about it later. Let's go.

VERNON:
Some superheroes.

You can't even get us
out of a locked room.

Would you cork it?

We're doing
the best we can.

I have yet to see a door in this
place that has a simple handle.

Oh, that's because
they're all voice-activated.

What?
What?

Sure. I got it
right here on tape.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Golden mongoose.

IRMA:
But you may as well forget it.

Because I think the doors
are programmed to respond

only to the people
that work here.

But Irma, you've got
one of the voices on tape.

Yeah. So?

Well, play it back
again, dudette.

And this time,
pump up the volume.

[NERD CLEARS THROAT]

NERD:
Golden mongoose.

Merciful heavens!
We're free!

Where the blazes can
those other two turtles be?

There.

[♪♪♪]

DONATELLO:
Come on.

They've gotta be
around here somewhere

Leonardo! Michelangelo!
You're free!

Have you seen
Irma and Vernon?

Uh, cat got
your tongue?

[BOTH GRUNT]

[METALLIC SOUNDS]

[GASPS]

They're robots!

[GRUNTING]

Oh, he looks too much like
Michelangelo. I can't do it.

Well, I can, amigo.

Cowabunga!

LEONARDO:
Hang on, Donatello.

Boy, this is weird.

Leonardo, catch!

Something's happened
with the expl*sive robots.

We lost contact
with them.

You've got to
re-establish contact.

Boost the transmitter power.
[KNOCK AT DOOR]

The turtle robots?
What are they doing here?

Why haven't they captured
the other two turtles

like they were supposed to?

We could be experiencing
a total robotic malfunction.

You'd better let them in
so I can examine them.

Hm.

There doesn't seem to be

anything externally
wrong with them.

Surprise, cheese head!

[ALL SCREAM]

You lousy turtles!

You're not gonna mess up
my plans again!

I can't tell which one of these
gizmos controls the robots.

Well, guess I'll have to use
the process of elimination

DONATELLO:
Come on, we're almost
in the clear.

Yeah, as long as
we don't run into any...

robots?

IRMA:
They got us cornered.

Guys, this may be it.

We're doomed!

This had better be it.

[MECHANICS WINDING DOWN]

Oh! Leonardo
and Michelangelo did it.

The robots
are shut down.

Yeah,
but they're not.

This park is about to have

the biggest fireworks show
in history.

[TURTLE VAN ENGINE STARTS]

[TIRES SQUEAL]

[♪♪♪]

[EXPLOSIONS]

LEONARDO:
I owe you all a major apology.

You don't need to practice more.

Your skills are awesome
just the way they are.

No, no, dude.
You were right.

Yeah, we have been
goofing off too much.

Yeah. I mean, if we'd honed
our fighting skills more,

we might have avoided
a lot of trouble today.

Yeah. So, what do you say?

Let's head to the old
practice room

and have a real workout.

Are you nuts?

After all we've
been through today,

I wanna relax

and check out these
Ratzilla movies.

Well, then, so,
what'll it be, dudes?

Practice
or goofing off?

I-- I think goofing off--

Goofing off.
Yeah, me too, pretty much.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]