Welcome to our World! Where we serve you cookies to ensure you get the best viewing experience on our site.

Did you know that you can remove censorship board-wide, use our advanced search functions, be notified when new content is posted, join our memberships, set episodes to show in any order you want & more if you are logged into your account?

Register or sign in here: ucp.php?mode=register

01x06 - Yo, Would You Tell Ms. Chase I Still Love Her Like Crazy

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Bad Monkey". Aired: August 14, 2024.*
Watch/Buy Amazon


A detective turned restaurant inspector in Southern Florida is pulled into a world of greed and corruption after a tourist finds a severed arm while fishing.

01x06 - Yo, Would You Tell Ms. Chase I Still Love Her Like Crazy

Post by bunniefuu »

[Rosa groans] We were so close.

The Striplings are probably already
in the Bahamas having daiquiris.

It's only 9:30.

Daiquiris aren't really a breakfast drink.

- Can't someone just go and arrest them?
- [scoffs] It's not that simple, Rosa.

And there's extradition rules.

There's applications and authorizations,
and, you know, bureaus calling bureaus

and then lots of different crossing wires

and things that lead ultimately to
the ability to go do something like that.

It's not like you just, you know,
go and do it.

- You don't know, do you?
- I don't.

But I believe I'm in the ballpark, yeah.

Let's see here.

[Rosa sighs]

- [phone rings]
- [sighs]

[sighs, breathes deeply]

I can't be talking to you.

I know, but I missed you.

And also, Nick Stripling's still alive.

I've got his cell phone
and a pretty good idea where he is.

I don't know, I thought maybe
we could swing by and we could talk

- about what our next move should be.
- f*ck no!

All right, that's a great starting place.

- How about a double f*ck no?
- We'll call that a baby step.

I know I'm in a bit of a jam here.

Dude, you're a m*rder suspect.

Maybe it's even a pickle.

Look, Ro, you are so good
at these situations.

I need your help, guy.

[Keith] Ro would always regret
what he said next.


- Come over. [sighs]
- Thank you.

Next time, can't we just start here?

Now, don't hang up on me.
You know that's a pet peeve of--


[breathes shakily]

[Keith] Considering the way
things had been going,


the smart move was for Neville to lay low,

but he had a hunch
the Dragon Queen could help him.


[sighs]

His hunches were as bad as Yancy's.

[screeches]

- Get off!
- The f*ck?

[Dragon Queen gasps]

- [grunts]
- [screams]

[panting]

[pants]

[gasps]

[panting]

[person coughs]

Egg! [shivers]

My man. My main man. My brother.

I am none of those things.

You are not. No.

You seen that kid Neville?

Uh, no, no.
I just dropped the boss and his missus.

Now I'm-- I'm gassin' up the plane,

taking some drug runners,
you know, back to the States, so...

I'm sure they appreciate
you telling everyone.

Ooh, excellent point.

Um, hey-- Uh, y-you have a second?

You look parched.

Wanna grab a quick coffee?
Or we could, um-- All right.

Well, we can push it. Rain check.

Wow, that guy is scary.

{an8}[Keith] Egg couldn't help
but feel frustrated,


{an8}both by Neville and sexually,

{an8}but he was pretty sure
he could go fix one of those.


{an8}Couldn't find him.
He's bleeding pretty bad.

{an8}He'll turn up in the hospital or dead.

{an8}I can't remember the last time
someone ran away

{an8}while my tongue was in their mouth.

{an8}Mm-mmm. You missed your chance.

{an8}Would've been good too. [huffs]

{an8}You can go.

{an8}Why men don't ever know
when they're supposed to leave?

{an8}Yancy still had the stink
of a dug-up grave on him,


{an8}so he needed a shower
and a change of clothes.


{an8}[Yancy] Pull over. I'll get out here
in case the cops are waiting at my place.

Just like high school.

My boyfriend Keith used to drop me off
a block away

so I could sneak in after curfew.

I gotta be honest with you,
I don't like the sound of that.

You and Keith, staying out late,

- doing God knows what.
- [sighs]

You know, curfews exist
because of guys like Keith.

[chuckles] Oh, my God.
You make me need coffee.

I don't make you do anything.
I'm not Keith.

[chuckles] I'll meet you later
at Rogelio's.

- Bring Keith.
- [laughs]

[Keith] After the initial excitement
wore off,


Cody buried himself in one of the books
Yancy had never read.


Damn, this dude is a good writer.

[Bonnie] Yeah.

Hey, you all right?

I'm just kind of tired of running.

Yeah, you know what? It's, uh--
[stammers] Actually, uh, never mind.

You know, I don't like it
when people don't finish their thoughts.

I find it really selfish and arrogant.

Yeah, I'm s-- I'm sorry.

Uh, I don't know, it's kind of stupid,
but, um, I was thinking I'm 27 now,


and you know,
they probably wouldn't chase you


if-- if we were, like... [stammers]
...like, a real couple.

I don't know, Cody.

Uh-- [chuckles] Yeah. No, you're right.

[Keith] But Bonnie had always seen
her life as a series of problems,


and the people around her,
well, they were just solutions.


So, who knows...

maybe she had found another one.

[chuckles]

- [Yancy grunts]
- [Cody groans]

[grunting] Get off me.

- [strains] Oh, what the--
- [Yancy] It's okay. Just let this happen.

- Just relax, just breathe.
- [grunting] Bonnie.

- Ea-- Easy, easy.
- [grunting, groaning]

- [Cody breathes heavily]
- Andrew. Will you get off of him, please?

[Keith] As she looked at the forged deed,

{an8}Gracie knew she was close
to a point of no return.


[knocking]

You wanted to see me?

Thanks for coming.

Ya-Ya, we have guests.

When I hear you was trying to sell

your husband's little piece of land
on the beach,

I know we had to talk.

As you can see,
James gave it to me for my service.

I tell him I could only accept
if I'm able to help.

You can't put a price on the relief
you brought James and our whole family.

f*ck this. Call a lawyer, Mom.

Little girl, last time I stay quiet
around your disrespect. No more.

Any more nonsense out your mouth,
you'll regret it.

[widow] I'm sorry for her.

It's okay. She's grieving.

- Tell her I'm always here for her.
- [widow breathes shakily]

[hisses]

What? Why you make the cat noise?

Because your claws was out.
You was ready to go.

Nobody talk to you like that.

Except you.

So, when Mr. Wendell give you
such a generous gift?

Right before his spirit leave him,
he know the end was near.

Now, we could take a walk,
or you could get in somebody else's face?

[chuckles]

Nobody f*cking with Ya-Ya today.

Look, can you just get him
some Advil please?

- Thank you.
- No.

- Are you kidding me?
- Bonnie, he tried to k*ll me.

Stop being so dramatic.
He tried to scare you.

You, on the other hand,
tried to k*ll my husband.

I mean, what is it about me
that just drives men to violence?

I don't know, but I'm pretty sure

- you shouldn't be so happy about it.
- [Bonnie] Mmm.

That golf cart thing
is actually how I found her.

- [Bonnie] Hmm.
- I saw the video online.

- [Bonnie sighs]
- Sorry, man,

- I just thought you were dangerous.
- Huh.

- See, you were trying to protect me.
- [chuckles]

Okay, look, you know that I root for love,

and I couldn't be happier
for you two crazy kids.

But you're a fugitive. We both are.
You can't stay here.

Well, you know what? I got a backup plan.

See, he's coming through for you.
Go ahead. What is it?

Well, I got us a room at the Motor Inn.

- Oh.
- [Cody] Yeah.

Hmm.

Lesson one, champ:
She doesn't do Motor Inns.

A-Any chance we could spend
a few nights at the cabin

just until I figure out what's next?

[sighs] Sure.

I gotta go to Ro's.

- [sighs] Yes.
- [Yancy] Be gone before I'm back.

That little f*ck.

- [operator] 911. What's your emergency?
- [Evan] Yeah, hi.

Uh, I'm actually calling to report a--
a sighting of a wanted man. Andrew Ya--

- Hey.
- It's a false alarm.

Hey! No, no, no! What the--

Hopefully, you have
the find your phone feature.

Dude, I just got a chick's number.
I didn't back it up. f*ck!

Hey, excuse me. Yeah.

Go back to the woods or whatever.

g*dd*mn it.

[Keith] As he waited for Yancy,

Ro couldn't stop
thinking about all of Sonny's threats.


[Monte] Flaco,
have you seen Natalia's hair clip?

What hair clip?

Her unicorn hair clip. It's her favorite.

She can't find it,
and she's losing her sh*t.

- You okay?
- Mm-hmm.

- Why?
- When you think,

your forehead gets all scrunched.

You're gonna get lines.

I should warn you, I'm not gonna get old
with a guy who looks old.

Too late.

I'm good.

Are you sure?

Cross my heart.

- Okay, okay. Bye.
- Okay.

[speaks Spanish]

[island music playing on speakers]

We're not open yet.

Not even for me?

Hey.

No, no, no.

I left my house for you,
put on a nice outfit.

That greeting ain't acceptable.
Come again.

Hello, Queen.

Better.

Who pissed in your beer?

Still no g*nsh*t victim showing up
at the hospital.

So sad for you.

Relax, man, it will all work out.

- Things usually do for me.
- [scoffs]

I need a favor.

I wanna meet your boss.

I got something for him. Something good.

Good for you or good for the both of us?

I ain't decide yet.

[laughs]

We gotta see how you behave.

[Yancy sighs]

Hey, buddy.
You won't believe my last couple days.

You okay? What's going on?

I'm sorry, man.

[sirens blaring]

Ro, what did you do?

It's gonna be fine. Let the system work.
You didn't do anything wrong.

You know the drill,
step down and assume the position.

[cop] Arms up.

[Yancy] My former friend here
just said it. I did nothing wrong.

- He's got a finger in his pocket.
- That's not mine.

Andrew Yancy, you're under arrest
for the m*rder of Israel O'Peele.

g*dd*mn, it feels good to say that.

Your nose looks terrible.
How'd that happen?

Get him out of here.

Your sheriff said you set this up.

You made the right decision, man.
Thank you.

Okay.

[cop speaks indistinctly]
You have the right to remain silent.

Anything you say will be used
against you in a court of law.

You have the right to talk to an attorney

and have them present
while being questioned.

If you cannot afford an attorney,
one will be appointed to you.

You have the right to an--

[Bonnie] What's with all the notebooks?

[country music playing on speakers]

- Ooh, actually, sorry. [chuckles]
- [mutters]

It's just, uh-- Don't go through that one.

[chuckles] What are these? Diaries?

Uh, they're-- [exhales deeply]

It's, like, a... [sighs]
...a book that I'm writing.

You're a writer?

- Trying to be.
- What's it about?

Well, it's about-- about this.

Us.

[Keith] Bonnie didn't wanna
get ahead of herself,


but if he was still good in bed,
they'd probably be married by the weekend.


The Yancy family cabin
on the St. Johns River


had been there for years.

It was quaint,

which in Florida speak, means it had
no air-conditioning and tons of bugs.


On the positive side,
Bonnie was pretty damn sure


that the Oklahoma State Police had no idea

that this godforsaken place even existed.

[Bonnie sighs]

Okay.

No one will bother us here.

[Jim] I thought the same damn thing.

Sorry, Andrew told us
the cabin would be empty.

[laughs] That sounds like my son.

How is he?

[Yancy] I'm just saying
you are wearing that uniform.

Free weights or just body weights?

You look great. What's the secret?

[Keith] Not even Tilly
or her beloved carrots


could make Eve forget
that Yancy was still alive,


and she knew just who to blame.

- Mind if I join you?
- You may not.

What if I told you that Yancy
just got charged with m*rder?

Florida Crime Blotter. Right there.

How are you not done yet?
It's, like, one short paragraph.

f*ck off and let me finish.

Now, you can get in the 'cuzzi.

- [chuckles]
- Holy sh*t, babe.

It's like we couldn't
have planned it better, right?

[sighs] I hope the charges stick.

You know, I wonder if I should
send Caitlin over to Yancy's place

just to plant a cell phone or something.

I know what you're gonna say,
she'll just f*ck it up,

but she's a good girl.

Oh, she's such a good girl, babe.

We should keep talking about her
instead of doing this.

[Egg clears throat]

Dude, we're about to bone here.

I have an offer from the Dragon Queen.

What the f*ck's a Dragon Queen?

[Monte] I called over

and there is no record of any private
plane leaving that airport at that time.

I saw him with my own eyes, Monte.

He's alive. Are you telling me
that they found nothing?

They did find a decomposed finger
in your pocket.

Well, that's just for good luck.
That's my special thing.

- It's Nick's finger.
- [sighs]

We dug it up so we could go through
his cell phone.

Have they even checked his cell phone yet?

There's no cell phone in evidence.

f*cking Mendez. You know he took it.

- Hey.
- Hey?

Why didn't you tell me?

Because I knew you'd tell him,
and then he wouldn't have shown up.

[speaks Spanish]

- [speaks Spanish]
- [sighs]

[speaks Spanish]

- [speaks Spanish]
- All right, gentlemen, gentlemen,

I do appreciate the raw emotion
of your native tongue.

I'd love to be included in this.

- What are you doing? You know him.
- What do you mean what?

You don't think it's possible that he went
to interview that piece of sh*t doctor,

and the guy pulled a g*n
and Yancy had to sh**t him?

- Did that happen?
- No.

See?

[phone buzzes]

Excuse me.

By the way,
this is the least sexy you've ever been.

I'm not feeling it either.

[Rosa] This is bullshit.
I'm coming down there.


No, no, no, no, no, don't do that.

[speaks Spanish] You could lose your job.

I can help.

Really? Are you a witness?

Did you see Nick Stripling alive?

No, but I did see the plane.

Yeah, nobody's gonna believe you either.
Without proof, that plane doesn't exist.

Look, I know you told me to leave it alone
and I put you in a bad spot,

but, Ro, this does not feel great.

You think I feel great?

- Sorry, I'd hate to hurt your feelings.
- [door opens]

You be in emotional prison.
I'll be in the real one.

[Keith] Evan Shook wasn't normally
a deep thinker,


but he had convinced himself
that if he could just find his phone,


he might get his mojo back as well.

[sputters] Uh, hello?

Ah, nice badge.

Hey, I'm glad you guys caught
that sh*t heap, Yancy.

Hope he gets f*cking shivved in jail.

Actually, I'm looking for, like,
an attractive, middle-aged white lady.

You and me both, sister. [chuckles]

A: Do not call me sister.

- That's not for you.
- Okay.

Secondly, I can still see your wedding
ring from here, so that's very gross.

Eagle eyes, huh?

I'm sorry, Miss, uh, Officer,
there was a lady here.

She kind of left with, like,
the guy that she was with.

I know not where.

- Thank you.
- Yep.

You know, this is the first time
I've seen your house in the light.

[Evan] Uh-huh.

Truly f*cking insane, my man.

Thank you.

Not a compliment.

[Keith] Problem with
being a federal agent is


you can't even snoop around in a m*rder
suspect's house without probable cause.


Or, you could just say f*ck it.

I'm doing it. I'm going in.

[Keith] This was just what Bonnie needed.

She tried to take it all in.

It was easier than she thought.

[Cody] Cannonball!

It wasn't a cannonball, but Cody liked to
yell that whenever he went swimming.


Manatee? Like the one
that told you to clean up your life?

Andrew should keep his trap shut.

[both laugh]

He always talked about how much
you both love it here.

Yeah.

It took 33 million years
to make this place.

It began with a tiny crack
in the limestone,

allowing an underground river
to feed a humongous fountain.

Wow.

That's not magic,
I don't know what you call it.

Geology.

[chuckles] Ah. Now I see
why you two got along so well.

[sputters] You gotta come in.
It's so clear.

- Crystal clear.
- [Cody breathes deeply]

A place like this
holds up a mirror to our soul...

shows us what's real.

Sounds like doing mushrooms.

Yeah, it is kind of like that.

Andrew was right about you.
You really are a hoot.

Been called worse.

[Cody exclaims] Cannonball!

[music continues]

[Keith] Just like that,
all of Bonnie's skepticism washed away,


because this sure as hell
felt pretty magical.


She got the message with a wink.

As far as Cody goes,
well, she just had to follow her heart.


[breathes deeply]

[gasps, breathes deeply]

Look at our little Egg
calling meetings, making moves.

Sorry. I know
you've got a great opportunity for us.

She controls a piece of the beachfront

- you're trying--
- I can speak for myself.

Ah.

Looks like they haven't figured out
who's wearing the pants today. [chuckles]

We do sort of a 50-50 thing in our house.

- Right, babe?
- [chuckles]

Teamwork makes the dream work.

Whenever you're ready.

Dazzle us.

It's the Wendell property. Before he died,

James Wendell give it to me
as payment for my services.

What services?

I help him die.

I know you make Mrs. Wendell an offer
on the property.

Now you make me an offer instead.

It is a beautiful property.

[Eve] Well, great.

Now that we've discussed this amazing
opportunity, no more business.

- Go get us some drinks.
- Coming up.

Well, you're making them. Let's go.

[Eve] Thanks, guys.

Those are our guys, our guys.
They're so cute.

What?

I don't think you and your husband
make a 50-50 couple in no way.

Really? 60-40?

- No.
- If you say so.

[Yancy sighs]

[door buzzes]

Wow, that's a pretty small crate
for a dog your size.

Let me guess, you would've been here


but you wanted to think
of something clever and funny to say...

- [scoffs]
- ...for when you saw me.

Mission accomplished.

No, honestly, perfect line.

- Just keep talking.
- Okay.

Do you realize how f*cked you are?

Are you really gonna pin this sh*t on me?

- Yeah.
- Over what,

me ripping out your g*dd*mn mailbox
a few hundred times?

You know, allegedly.

What are we even doing here, man?

Have you ever been in a fight
with someone for so long,

you don't even remember how it started?

Oh, I remember how it started.

You made everyone believe
I was a dirty cop.

You are a dirty cop.

Yeah, but nobody knew that.

I have a feeling that anyone that met you
would've known that right away.

I mean, they might not
have known it, known it in their mind,

but they would've definitely have
felt it and known it in here.

You're such an as*h*le.

- I'm an as*h*le. You're an as*h*le.
- Yeah.

Who cares? Here's what matters:

Nick Stripling's alive, and he k*lled
Israel O'Peele and Charles Phinney.

Now, I know that you took his phone.

So just let me out of here,
and we'll find the guy together.

Listen, you can take all the credit
and be the hero,

and hell, they'll probably give you
a promotion for it.

Don't put your hatred for me
over doing what you know what's right.

I'm sorry, did you say something?

I wasn't listening.

You were listening.

Yeah, you were listening and you know it.

[door buzzes]

Absolutely were listening.

Obviously, your land is great.

It's definitely worth the 700 grand
that you want for it,

but I'm all tied up in construction
right now. So... [sighs]

...I just-- I don't have access
to the capital.

Babe, come on. It's, like,
the literal perfect spot for my boutique.

What if instead of, like, buying it,

we just dialed her in
on the back-end thing?

So, you mean, like,
give her 50 grand now for the deed

and then give her 3%
of the first-year gross? No.

She would make, like, five times
what her property is worth if we did that.

- We'd be suckers.
- [whines] For me, baby.

- All right. For you, anything. [chuckles]
- [chuckles]

So what do you say?

This sh*t does usually work?

[stammers] What are you doing?

No one's talking to you.

This bullshit does usually work on
the dumb tourists who come through here?

I mean, yeah.

- Yeah, they eat it up usually. [chuckles]
- I felt like we--

Did you not feel
like we were selling that...

- I did.
- ...so well? I was, like, so in it.

Egg, leave us.

[Nick] Hey, where do you think
you're going? You work for me.

He's more afraid of me than you.

You know who I am?

Yeah, you're, like,
a magician or some sh*t.

Yeah, and I love your vibe. Like,
your whole style, everything with the hat.

Like, what is it, a wrap? And then
the jewelry and your whole-- Such a--

You can feel it, eh?

That heaviness in your chest.

The sense you've made a grave mistake.

Don't forget that feeling.

Consider it a warning.

I've been watching you.

You've been busy bees, you two.

Busy building, busy stealing,
just busy, busy, busy.

You're thriving on my island
because I allow it.

But it can all go away with a whisper.

So when the sun comes up tomorrow,

maybe you buy this piece of land from me,
or not, ups to you.

As you Americans love to say... [chuckles]

..."It's not personal, just business."

But know this:

Disrespect is always...

personal.

So before we talk again,
it could serve you to ask around

and find out what happens to people
who f*ck with me.

Holy sh*t.

[sighs]

What the f*ck happened?

How did they know
Yancy was gonna be there?

Rosa, hey. Not the best place
to be talking about our friend.

Oh, please, Sheriff Bubba?

Yo, I've talked to him on the phone,
he doesn't know Spanish.

Sheriff. [in Spanish]
Word on the street is

you have a tiny d*ck.

[speaks Spanish]

[chuckles]

Look, Monte says that

there's no record of them
flying out of the airport.

We should break into that hangar

and find a manifest or

any proof they were there.

It's best if we stay out of that mess.

- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.

He needs help.

- [in English] Hey...
- [scoffs]

[stammers] ...aren't you the ME from Miami?

- [sighs] Yes.
- Oh, the phone does not do you justice.

Ugh, gross.

I know that Yancy was causing us both
a heap of trouble,

but he's been permanently sidelined,
thanks to this guy.

Set him up, hook, line, and sinker.

I didn't know that.

[in Spanish] I know things are

f*cked up

but I have to think of my husband and kids

and mortgage, you know.

Yes, I understand.

Sorry, I was just surprised.

I didn't know you were a f*cking prick.

[in English] To hell with her.

You did exactly
what I would've done. [sighs]

[Keith] It was, without a doubt,

the worst thing
anyone had ever said to Ro.


[sighs]

[Keith] Bonnie was always
one of those people that loved to say,


"Age is just a number."

But now she was starting to wonder

if it was finally time to figure out
where the hell her life was going,


and with whom.

Hey, you.

Wow.

- Uh, sorry.
- Mmm. That's okay.

I could use a "wow" every now and then.

[chuckles] I was just working on my book.

[chuckles] Yeah.

Make sure you put this in it.

[both breathe heavily]

You smell like a river.

In a good way?

- No. Go shower.
- Oh.

Yes, ma'am. Whatever you say.

[water running]

[Keith] Bonnie couldn't help herself.
I mean, who could?


[Cody] When I signed up
for senior honors English,


I thought maybe I'd learn a little.

Never thought someone
would steal my heart.


Like an angel, there she was,

Ms. Chase, even hotter
than she was in high school.


Her white top was unbuttoned low,
which was pretty sweet.


More freckles than I remember,
but who cares?


Today we went swimming
with her old boyfriend's dad,


which was kinda weird, but he seems cool.

He didn't c*ck me or anything.

[Keith] The pit hit her stomach
pretty damn fast,


and it wasn't reading about
purple hard-ons that could cut a diamond


or even a*s cheeks
you could rest your beer on.


It was that this supposed book
seemed like it was written by a child.


[Keith] Rosa had never done
any breaking and entering without Yancy,


but the time had come.

[Rosa] Hello?

Hello?

[breathing shakily]

[drug runners clamoring]

[speaking Spanish]

Thank you, Candy.

A funny thing happened on the way in.

I completely fell asleep right before
we landed and no one even noticed.

I swear I woke up
when the wheels hit the tarmac.

Take that, regulators.

You guys need to get r-right back to work,
or you wanna grab a beer?

Quieres una cerveza?
[imitates bottle opening]

Okay, no. We can rain check.

[drug runner speaks Spanish]

- Uh, I didn't hear anything--
- [shushes]

Enrique, I say this as a friend,

but maybe you're doing a little too much
of your own...

[imitates whooshing, whistles]

Keep talking, I'll f*cking k*ll you.

[Claspers] Wow.
That seemed overly aggressive.

- [child laughs]
- [babysitter laughs]

Okay... [chuckles] ...Natalia had her bath.
Do you want me to take her upstairs?

- Honey, you ready for bed?
- Come on, Papa.

Daddy never has me go to bed this early.

Where is he?

He's in Miami, helping Uncle Yancy.

Go brush your teeth.

[both laugh]

Thank you, Paula. You can go on home.

- Okay.
- [speaks Spanish]

[speaks Spanish]

[Keith] Normally, Ro liked
putting Benito to bed,


but tonight it took him
somewhere he didn't wanna go.


[Yancy] Okay, you ready?

- Yeah.
- [Yancy] Let's get to the loot.

This is super cool.
This is like a pocket toolbox.

- You've got lots of stuff in there.
- A knife?

Well, a knife is one of the tools in it,
but it's also got a can opener. It's got--

When would they be opening cans?

- I'll take those. Thank you.
- Oh, really?

I had a feeling that might happen, but
we got more where that stuff came from.

Oh, who's this for? Let me try
to remember this one here.

Oh, my goodness, look at that,
a unicorn hair clip.

I know unicorns are your favorite.

- I'm gonna go put it in.
- Yeah, go ahead. You'll look great.

What could this be
for this old sailor here?

Go ahead, have at it, rip it open.
Look at that.

- A turtle?
- Yeah.

Your dad was telling me that you
don't like the red lights at night.

And did you know that those are for
these little guys here?

These guys are born in the sand,

but then when they get big enough
to crawl,

they follow the light of the moon
back to the water where they're safe.

But if they see a white streetlamp,

sometimes they think
that the white light is the moon,

and then they'll follow that into town,

and then they can, you know,
get smooshed by a truck or a car,

you know, get k*lled by these vehicles
that don't see them.

Bro.

How do they know to follow the moon?

It's their guiding light.
Everybody's got one.

What's yours?

I don't know. [chuckles]

You know, most of the time,
I just follow this guy here

and, uh, he usually leads me
the right way.

All right, go play with that turtle.

[Benito chuckles]

What is the problem with a pocketknife?

It's a knife.

[inhales sharply] f*ck. [sighs]

- What?
- Oh, nothing. [shushes] It's all right.

[mutters indistinctly]

So, is this what déjà vu feels like?

Oh--

You know, I think I saw a bottle
of 2009 Silver Oak.

You wait here and I'm gonna grab it.

Is that, like, a wine?

Yeah, that's a wine. Mm-hmm.

That's romantic as f*ck.

[breathes shakily]

[Keith] The crickets weren't
loud enough to drown out


Bonnie's screaming conscience.

Luckily, she'd learned
how to bury the guilt so deep


that she'd forget all about it
if she could just have a second alone.


[Jim] You okay?

I really screwed up Cody, didn't I?

The moment that boy walked in the door,
I could tell something wasn't right.

And you've met my son,

so you know I'm well-versed in grown men
with issues between the ears. [chuckles]

I imagine you had a lot of fun
with young Cody back in the day.

It was exciting, that's for sure.

And my life was never exciting.

But then you left town,
moved on, he didn't.

He thought he was still in love,
the dipshit.

It's my fault.

When I was, uh, swimming,

- I saw your manatee.
- [chuckles]

And I felt like it was telling me
to really go for it with Cody.

It sounds like it was a different manatee.

Y-You wanna know what I always tell Andrew
when he's in a pickle?

H-He calls it the pickle speech.

Not right now.

Understood.

[Keith] Bonnie wasn't the only one

who felt trapped
by all the poor choices she made.


You gotta be kidding me.

Huh. Main guy, right?

Well, I'm actually glad that it's you guys

'cause I-I know you've probably
been hearing

some pretty great things about me
from the Keys.

I know you two shitheads have a history
of f*cking with each other.

That's not the case.

Mr. Yancy got himself caught up
in a m*rder, and we've got a witness.

My client didn't k*ll anyone.

That's great. Good job.

That's right. It was this Stripling guy
who also happens to be dead.

When we arrested Yancy,
we found Stripling's finger in his pocket.

Like now it's a crime all of a sudden to
walk around with a finger in your pocket.

I mean... [stammers] ...it's a long story.

That does not involve m*rder.

I mean, it does just, you know,
isn't me c-committing a m*rder.

It's a close-range g*nsh*t to the head.
The neighbor heard the g*nsh*t.

Seconds later, she spots Yancy
walking out of the apartment.

I went over there to talk to O'Peele,
but when I got there, he was already dead.

So you admit to knowing the victim

and being in his apartment
the day he was k*lled?

How we doing?

Andrew is obviously being set up
by someone with a grudge.

A grudge? I haven't had contact
with Yancy in years.

That's not true.
Oh, I smash this guy's mailbox

every time I'm in his neighborhood,

and recently, I broke his nose right
through a body bag, like a soccer player.

Just wham. Came right out,
and I cracked it.

So I would say that's close contact,
and that's definitely with under a year.

Based on this evidence,

we have to recommend that the DA
moves forward with an indictment.

Have to-- I mean,
you don't have to do anything.

This is America. Should we take a vote?

- [Monte sighs]
- I'm not in support of it.

[Claspers] Well, let's keep in touch.

You know, you got my number.

I'm pretty available, so--
Any of you guys on social media?

[door closes]

[Keith] After a full hour
of listening to Claspers talk


without a single person responding,

Rosa finally exhaled
and resumed her search.


[airplane creaking]

[grunts, groans]

- Oh, my God. Oh, my God, are you okay?
- [pants]

I know you.

Cream, two sugars.

All right, be honest with me. How f*cked
am I on a scale from one to ten?

A million.

You couldn't just say ten?

You don't think I'd understand
that ten is bad?

- You're f*cked.
- Oh, my God.

- [door opens]
- Here we go.

Sorry to keep you waiting.

Regarding jurisdiction,

we're aware there may be a connection
with the Phinney m*rder in Key West,

but because of O'Peele,

we're gonna let Officer Mendez
hold your client here in Miami.

- That okay?
- [Yancy] Time to vote again.

No, I'm-- I'm not okay with that.
You got anything to stop that?

Why are my kids here?

Hi, Daddy.

Sorry to interrupt.

I just spoke to Mrs. Blank,
the primary witness in this matter.

Oh, for f*cking Christ's sake.
We've been through this.

She saw him there

- right after she heard the g*nshots.
- Correct.

That's what she said in her statement.
You know what else she said?

I only have grape, no mango.

Benito had asked her for a snack.

- [both] Thank you.
- [Mrs. Blank chuckles]

But then I assured her it was
"okay to tell me the whole story."


She says she "told Detective Mendez"
that before the m*rder


she did see another man
"hanging around O'Peele's apartment."


She remembered him
because "he only had one arm."


Like the guy in the movie,
uh, The Fugitive.

She said I probably didn't see it
because "there are no Mexicans in it."

I told her I'm not Mexican,
"I'm Puerto Rican."


Yeah, she's super r*cist.

She went on to explain
that Detective Mendez told her

to keep that part out of her statement.

Or the real m*rder*r, Mr. Yancy,
would probably go free.

I mean, I'm not a lawyer, but that feels
like that would be good for my case.

- No?
- [Monte] Mm-hmm.

g*dd*mn it.

I told you. A sock on the highway.

I thought we weren't gonna let this clown
become a detective.

- It was three years ago. I forgot.
- Forgot.

Okay, this is bullshit, all right.
These two are married,

these two are best friends.

- We're good friends too.
- Yeah.

You think that that's the only evidence
I got, Sally?

There's a whole other folder
on my f*cking desk, okay?

- I'd go f*cking get it.
- I would love to see that too.

Yeah, you know what? I'm actually good
either way with the folder.

You took our kids with you to interview
a witness and then you brought them here?

I let Paula go home.

Showed up when it mattered, Ro.

Appreciate you.

Just a nod, not a smile?

God, it kills this guy to show any joy.

[knocking]

[Johnna] Johnna Russell,
Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation.

I'm looking for a Plover Chase.

I don't know who that is.

Bonnie.

Oh, yeah, she's out back.

- We have a problem. Mendez took off.
- [official] g*dd*mn it.

Bad guys always run, but don't feel bad.
I mean, who could've seen that coming?

[Keith] Yancy was right.

When you screw up, it's always easier
to get the hell out of Dodge


than it is to face the music.

As for Bonnie, well, she knew in her heart
it was time to stop running.


[engine whirring]

- [Jim] Whoa.
- Just not today.

You just missed her.

Also, I'd like to report a stolen airboat.

[leaves rustling]

[sighs]

[screaming]