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01x14 - Scuba Duba

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Secrets of !sis". Aired: September 6, 1975 – October 23, 1976.*
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!sis is the alter ego of Andrea Thomas, a seemingly normal schoolteacher, who transforms into the Egyptian goddess when presented with crises a mere mortal cannot resolve.

01x14 - Scuba Duba

Post by bunniefuu »

[Music]

oh my queen said the royal sorcerer to

hatch upset

with this amulet you and your

descendants are endowed by the goddess

!sis with the powers of the animals and

the elements you will soar as the falcon

soars

run with the speed of gazelles

and command the elements of sky and

earth

three thousand years later a young

science teacher dug up this lost

treasure and found she was heir to

the secrets of !sis

and so unknown to even her closest

friends rick mason and cindy lee she

became a dual person andrea thomas

teacher

almighty !sis and

!sis

dedicated foe of evil defender of the

wake

champion of truth and justice

[Music]

you mean you'd rather go bird watching

than play tennis with me ridiculous

isn't it

well i can't blame you if you'd rather

face an eagle than my blazing serve i

know i should be horse-whipped for

reminding you but the last time i faced

your blazing serve you lost six to

nothing it was just a fluke

besides i won't let that happen again

i've been practicing since yesterday

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

hi what's happening come on nance let's

go go go where willie beacon says he

spotted an eagles nest up on rocky point

an eagle's nest on rocky's point i

refuse to believe it i know this isn't

eagle territory but if it's true i want

to get a picture before anybody else

does okay but i don't believe it

[Music]

there there it is

hey i bet it is an eagle's nest that's

it all right looks like there might be

some eggs in it

what a picture that's gonna make did you

bring your telephoto lens uh i won't

need it i'll go down there to take the

shot

that is a bit dangerous

what kind of dangerous we took up

mountain climbing for just this kind of

thing didn't we yeah the mountain

climbing's different you come prepared

you do bring the right equipment now

would the old master come unprepared

you gotta have more faith in me nance

voila that's french for look what i got

you're not going down on that i'm so

afraid i wouldn't use a tie christmas

present it's plenty safe for one more

trip

look at that like a steel cable oh

please steve

[Music]

i really wish you wouldn't it'll be all

right you'll see

you just keep an eye out for mama eagle

and let me know if she comes back

be careful

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

i told you to be a piece of cake

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

one little slip

[Music]

[Music]

mighty iceland

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

i can't hold on much longer

hang on i'm going

!sis nancy it's steve i know

sister goddess of the wind return to me

the rope the fail

[Music]

!sis please please hurry

strands of rope which were undone come

together now as one

[Music]

steve grab the rope

[Applause]

got

it

now steve

[Music]

[Music]

thanks !sis

[Applause]

you know what would have happened if you

hadn't come along i do and it wouldn't

be a very pleasant thought

for a young man who's supposed to be

familiar with mountain climbing

equipment

using that sort of thing is unforgivable

i'm sorry !sis

it won't happen again

and i'll make sure it doesn't

good

[Music]

i'm an eagle i'm an eagle

say it

i'm an eagle

what are you teaching him cindy it's an

experiment i'm trying to build tut's ego

to the point where he thinks he's an

eagle he already believes he's an eagle

that's his problem

is everything put away everything's put

away then we can go

is mr mason coming by to pick you up no

today is his day to coach the scuba

diving class in that case how about a

sandwich on the way home that is a

spectacular idea i'm starved

and i'll buy thank you

hi girls

[Music]

everybody put your gear down and we'll

talk a bit over here

he gives us that safety lecture one more

time i swear come on steve he's only

doing it very good i know i know but i'm

getting tired of the routine we've heard

it a million times safety safety safety

okay everybody listen and listen

carefully

i know you've heard this all before but

you're gonna hear it again and often the

name of the game is safety what'd i tell

you

no there is no margin for error the

first mistake you make could very well

be your last now we were lucky today

there were mistakes made but none of

them were fatal

you steve you're number one

me

yes you you came all the way up from 12

feet without exhaling once heck mr mason

it was only 12 feet look at me i'm okay

sure you are this time but next time you

may not be now i've warned you that six

feet is a danger point it's very

possible to get an air embolism on the

way to the surface if you don't breathe

now you have a tank use it yes sir

all right now everybody else the first

cardinal rule of diving is that you

never dive without a partner

okay you never dive without a partner

man he's getting to be a real old lady

with these rules would you stop that

you've caused more than enough troubles

it is

[Music]

put on exactly the same amount of plain

water as you have oil

which proves that water is heavier than

oil and why we would see oil floating on

the surface of water right

how was your scuba diving class all

right except for a problem what's up

steve conrad i'm thinking of dropping

him from the club

isn't he a good diver mr mason he's

careless and impatient and those traits

just aren't good for a scuba diver

you're right he has to be taught to

control his impatience and not be

careless that's a pretty big job you're

talking about well it's certainly worth

the effort steve is potentially a very

valuable human being he's studying to be

an environmentalist he's interested in

endangered species of all kinds and he's

a very personable young man that andrea

steve is an endangered species and if he

doesn't quit being so careless and

impatient he's going to become extinct

i agree so do i so do i sort of lie

you're awful close to getting thrown out

of the scuba diving club

kidding what did he do

mr mason thinks you're too careless too

impatient

just too dangerous for yourself uh mr

mason worries too much that stunted

rocky coin didn't help any it was an

accident sure but it's the kind of

accident that happens only to you not to

other people come on cindy look i've

earned my brownie points by warning you

it's your baby now

see you later

thanks cindy

oh come on you're not gonna let mother

mason's nitpicking bother you are you

yes because he's not all wrong i mean

sometimes you scare me half to death the

way you jump into things without even

thinking you mean that rocky point

business again it could have happened to

anybody but it didn't and like cindy

says it happened to you and maybe the

next time it happens !sis won't be there

to help you tell you what why don't we

wait and see if i get into real trouble

again and we'll find out

okay

okay

hi miss thomas hi cindy

i have a confession to make oh

i just ran into steven nancy and you

told steve everything mr mason had to

say

how did you know that why else would you

look so guilty

did i do the wrong thing no you did the

right thing i think mr mason will agree

i just hope steve thinks so too

masks and fins

uh weight belt secure

okay everybody check your regulators

steve

is all of your equipment working

properly

yes sir i think so i don't care what you

think i want you to know that everything

is working properly now you go back and

recheck every piece of equipment when

you know it's working perfectly you

recheck it again you understand yes sir

check double check triple check

right okay everybody let's go pair up we

might as well get wet what about me mr

mason nancy isn't here yet i'm sorry

steve you know the rules no diving

without a partner you'll just have to

wait until she can join us okay

everybody let's go

[Music]

ah what is it ted i'm an eagle i'm an

eagle

i don't care what cindy says you're not

an eagle you're not even bold enough to

be an eagle

i'm not even sure you're really a bird

i'm an eagle

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

so

[Music]

mr mason

i'm sorry i'm late i guess i missed the

dive i'm afraid you did

or steve

i don't know why because i told him to

wait here for you

you don't think he could have gone down

all by himself it looks that way

everybody check your tanks we're going

in again nancy i'm sure everything is

all right but just to be on the safe

side and have a backup will you notify

the lake patrol yes sir okay okay let's

go everybody in

[Music]

great

[Music]

wow

[Music]

[Music]

so

[Music]

oh miss thomas it's steve something may

have happened to him i'm going to get

help

[Music]

mighty iceland

[Music]

[Music]

oh zephyr winds would throw on high with

me now so i can fly

[Music]

well we're just about all out here so

there's nothing left for us to do but

wait

hope that steve isn't in any trouble

!sis

your timing's perfect steve's under the

water alone we can't find him i know it

give me your tank there's not much air

left in it let's hope we won't need much

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

it's !sis it's !sis she's got it

[Music]

steve

are you all right fine

fine mr mason

i don't know what to say !sis except

thanks again

thanks is enough rick i'm just glad i

got to him in time i'll guarantee you

one thing

you won't have to do it again

don't be too hasty with him rick

[Music]

she took my tank and without putting it

on jumped in well to make a long story

short thanks to !sis steve is still with

us

i think nancy feels worse than steve

but hello

it's thomas you missed everything steve

was trapped underwater and ice has saved

him

is he all right

oh he's fine now

oh he's fine but he won't be fine when i

kick him out of the club oh mr mason oh

mr mason

steve is such a nice guy but this was

the worst and final stunt

he looks pretty scared to me look me too

if it hadn't been for !sis i'd have

steve on my conscience for the rest of

my life i mean he's through that's it no

thanks

at least have a talk with him all right

i'll talk with him but it won't do any

good because he's out of the club period

[Music]

steve i have something i want to say to

you

well i bet you do mr mason

i have something to say to you too oh

is it okay if i go first before i lose

my nerve

okay go ahead

mr mason

you know all those safety rules you kept

pounding at us over and over again

make sure don't take chances double

check

well

i used to think you were just being an

old lady about it

but i gotta tell you

from now on compared to me you're gonna

look like some kind of a daredevil

whatever you do to me mr mason

this is one lesson i'm never gonna

forget

well i'll tell you what steve

as long as it never happens again

i won't take you out of the club

i will put you on suspension for the

rest of the month

and probation for the remainder of the

year though

thanks a lot mr mason

you won't be sorry

okay steve

what was this out of the club business

period well i think he had a pretty good

scare and learned a lesson

besides i don't expect any more trouble

out of steve

what are you two smirking about

i'm not smirking mr mason neither am i

women

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]