02x01 - En palais

[bunniefuu]

OFFICIAL STATEMENT
FROM THE PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC

["La Marseillaise" playing]

Women and men of France.
My fellow citizens.

As of today, I am stepping down
from my role as president

with a profound sense of sorrow.

I must admit that I would have
gladly served a third term,

but apparently,
doing so isn't "democratic."

Whatever.

So, during my terms,
did I succeed at everything?

No.

Have I made blunders? Yes.

The extramarital affair with Magalie
was a regrettable misunderstanding.

Did I lie to you?

Yes. Yes, I did.

But isn't it more important in the end
that I admitted everything

when Magalie presented
to the press the evidence she had kept?

My fellow citizens,

I would like to conclude
with a message of fraternity.

Not all of France's problems
can be attributed solely to immigrants.

Not always, anyway.

Some of them are even
a blessing for our country,

just like my successor,
our new president, Stéphane Blé.

Yes, he's French. Indeed.

But he's Black, and I'm happy about it.

He's reliable and honest.

Vibrant.

And I know that he'll be able
to bring to the top of the state,

tropical good-heartedness.

[low-key music playing]

I'll be president
for white people, Black people.

I'll be president for hobos,

for women, for women who wear hijabs,
for th*gs, dwarves, redheads.

I'll be a free president,
one who never gives up.

I won't neglect anyone.

Not in cities, not in the countryside,
not in overseas French territories.

And I'll implement my key measure,
"Eat well, for free."

Long live France. Long live the republic.

Salaam, shalom, see ya.

All together. All together.

Yes.

["À Nous la Victoire"
by Pit Baccardi playing]

OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT

[song stops abruptly]

[vacuum whirring]

[turns vacuum off]

I thought I was the first
Black person in the Élysée.

- Isn't it tomorrow?
- Yeah, yeah, it's tomorrow, auntie.

We just came to rehearse a little bit.

- I'm Stéphane Blé, French president.
- [woman] Ah.

I'm Sorona. Nice to meet you.

[Stéphane] Nice to meet you, auntie.

Morning, all.

- Mr. President.
- Hello.

Now that I'm your head of security detail...

Co. Co.

- Pardon me?
- Co-head, ma'am.

Right. Uh, I must insist,
we have to speed things up.

The inauguration is approaching,

and we're not there yet
in terms of safety.

But I think it's most important for you
to take time to work on your speech.

I've written a first draft. Here it is.

Yasmine, can I talk to you for a minute?

Uh, but...

Just to let you know,

I'm not a big fan of drafts,
you know what I mean?

I'm a firm believer
in the power of hip-hop.

I feel like if I show up at the ceremony
and unleash some freestyles,

I guarantee you the crowd
will absolutely eat it up.

- Oh no. No.
- It might just go down in history.

No improv, no freestyling.
You'll make a speech that's been written.

And I'd like to add, make it short.

The less you expose yourself, the better.

After all these threats we've received,
we can't take any risks.

- White supremacists?
- Yes.

But not only. Uh, yeah, mostly.

But there are also the Salafists,
the survivalists, the royalists,

and the animalists.

Anyway, it's coming from all sides
like never before.

Well, you're used to it, aren't you?
It's no problem.

Yeah, yeah. Totally.

- [chuckles]
- Thing is, when you were elected,

the previous head of security department,
he called it quits.

And his assistant as well.
The whole team quit.

- You're brand-new to this, basically.
- Yes. Just like you guys.

- We're all going to learn together.
- We're all going to die together, rather.

Stéphane, I already told you,
I need a weapon.

Forget about it. No. No way.

- [Alice] No g*n without a license.
- We just received this for the president.

It's just been cleared by the b*mb squad.

[percussive music playing]

It's a banana.

- There's something inside.
- [Mo] What the...

Ooh, they went through a lot of trouble.

"Go back to Congo now, to eat bananas
and sing with La Compagnie Créole,

you filthy monkey."

"Oh-oh-oh. Ah-ah-ah. Oh-oh-oh. Ah-ah-ah."

"Oh-ah. Oh."

- "Oh-ah."
- So those are monkey screeches.

Oh yeah, you're right.

So, it seems very clear to me,
Mr. President.

I think this is a threat against you.

Because oftentimes,

people make comparisons
between Black people and monkeys.

- I mean, wrongfully so.
- What's she saying?

We could also do a presidential
inauguration online, on Zoom.

No, no, no. We're from the 'hood.
We're not afraid of anyone, all right?

This inauguration, we're gonna do it
up close and personal, and with strength.

- Plus, these guys are amateurs.
- Oh yeah? Why is that?

Why is that? Yeah, well,
the Compagnie Créole and Congo?

Totally unrelated.
It's all good, we got it. No problem.

[upbeat pop music playing]

REPRESENT

{an8}Stéphane Blé, or President Blé,
will move into the Élysée in 24 hours.

{an8}IS PRESIDENT BLÉ LEGITIMATE?

{an8}What is for certain
is that it's a big jump into the unknown.

{an8}Well, let's hope for his sake
it won't be a jump into the void,

{an8}as his "Eat well, for free" project.

{an8}It's all nice and good,
but it's impossible to finance.

{an8}- Yes.
- What is his agenda?

{an8}The answer's elusive.

{an8}For sure.
At the next legislative elections,

{an8}we know how politics work,
he's gonna get crushed, destroyed.

{an8}That's for sure.

{an8}He was elected, though,
despite a record-high abstention rate.

{an8}He has less than two months to become
the president, and most importantly,

to convince the French people.

Quick, quick.
We won, we should be able to enjoy a bit.

[Yasmine] We didn't win.

Without an assembly majority,
we can't do anything,

which means forget
your "Eat well, for free" measure.

No way. That's the top priority
on my to-do list, believe me.

I agree. So we don't have a choice.
We have to find support.

A real left-wing prime minister
with a real political party.

There aren't that many options.
Either Andréï...

Hey, have you lost your mind?

He's been up sh*t's creek lately,
to put it mildly.

- Never. Not a chance.
- [Yasmine] We agree on that.

- Good.
- So it'll be Corinne Douanier.

Rocky Balboa
doesn't work with Apollo Creed.

What are you talking about?

Of course he works with him, in Rocky III.

[sirens blaring distantly]

Very good point. Call her, ask her.

She doesn't have a phone.
So we're going to her.

[Stéphane scoffing] Wow.

You're very good.

You're a real brainiac...

behind that cloth.

Which is just a little piece of cloth,
in the end.

That's it, you know?

I have to stop in the 'hood a few minutes.
I've got something to deal with.

[Yasmine] What? No way.
Come on. We don't have time.

[Stéphane] What do you mean? I'm the prez.

I can do whatever I want. Relax.

["Mec d'Ici" by L2B playing]

[reporter 1] Mr. President,
are you gonna change your outfit?

- [reporter 2] Are you going to wear a tie?
- [man] Please, sorry.

How are you, sister? Alhamdulillah.

- [Alice] Excuse me.
- Let her speak, let her speak.

- It's protocol, Mr. President.
- No biggie.

- [man] Ma'am, ma'am.
- I don't mind, let her.

Excuse me, I have to talk to Stéphane.

- [Stéphane] Salaam alaikum, sister.
- Salaam, it was me.

- No, that's blasphemous.
- Don't talk to me. f*ck you.

Take me back in your team.
I swear, I've changed.

Listen to me, I'm not the same man.

I went back to my ancestral land
in the West Indies and I worked on myself.

- Man, the elections were 15 days ago.
- Who cares?

People can change that quickly.
I mean, it's just like speed-reading.

I have changed.
You know what my people say?

[speaking gibberish
with West Indies accent]

Do you know what that means?

It means that we are two different rivers,
with different paths,

but landing both in the same sea.

Together, moving in the same direction.

Both of us. Come on, buddy.
Don't do that. They're filming.

- No, we're not in the same direction.
- Stop.

- You need me and I need you. Please.
- I don't need you.

- I'm doing all right.
- Huh?

- Get him out of here, please.
- Please, I'll do anything.

- [Alice] Come on.
- You can't do this to me!

Wait, this isn't
an Islamophobic act, people.

- He's West Indian. I know him well.
- [man] I'm mixed race, you filthy r*cist!

That was very West Indies-ophobic.

- Let me go, I said!
- Sir, please. Stop. Leave.

Let go of me now!

Stay calm. Sir, stay calm. Leave.

Sir! Sir!

Okay, okay, come on. Enough.
I can't breathe. Let go. Let me breathe.

[sighs]

This here is a nice globe.

Look at that roundness,
that volume, that growth.

I'll be damned. Excuse me for a second.

- [door closes]
- You all right?

Can you leave us, man?

Okay.

[clears throat]

A bit further, perhaps, Mo?

The perimeter is secure.

You don't have an earpiece.

- What are you doing?
- So what?

I'm just practicing.

Are you coming to the inauguration?

I'm telling you again, no.

Look, if it's about Lamine, it's all good.

I managed to get him a job in the Élysée
kitchen for the community service hours.

- I've got him hooked up.
- Good for you.

But that's not for me, all right?

I liked my life from before.

It was serene.
And now, it's gonna be a mess.

Nothing is gonna change.
It'll be just like before. Relaxing.

- For real.
- [woman] Step back.

I'm sorry, you're not allowed
to remain in this area.

[Stéphane] Well, not quite relaxing,
but at least we'll be together.

We couldn't start a family.

And I miss you, you know?

Marion, I miss you.

You have to come to the inauguration.

We don't know how long
we'll be able to still see him.

[crowd shouting indistinctly]

Haven't you heard? I mean, we don't know
how long we can protect him from the...

[imitates g*nsh*t]

[grunting and groaning]

Hey!

He's stretching the truth a bit,

but we did get a package
with a b*llet hidden inside a banana.

- [scoffs]
- That's just what people do.

- That's just how it is.
- [Marion] Listen.

You're the president.
That's what you wanted to be.

I've never wanted to be first lady, okay?

I've never wanted to be first lady,
so good luck.

- [Stéphane] Wait.
- [Marion] Come on. Know what?

Let's give them a show.
Come on, get out, get out, get out.

Go on, Stéphane. Please.

- [camera shutters clicking]
- [crowd shouting]

{an8}FOR OUR FUTURE
FOR THE PLANET

[upbeat ska music playing]

[man] The enemy is in the house.

- [women boo]
- [woman] Oh, no. Come on.

- Get out of here. You're not welcome.
- Oh, oh, Jean-Carole!

There are no enemies here.
Only adversaries.

Hello, Stéphane.

Does someone have an E?
No? Are you sure you don't?

We're recycling the presidential election
posters for the legislative elections.

But to tell you the truth,
we're struggling with the V, G, and As.

Oh well, that's how it is.

Speaking of legislative elections,
do you want to go together?

- I'll make you prime minister.
- Prime?

- Prime ministress.
- Not minister?

Prime minister.
I got it right the first time.

Well, that's hardly a valid excuse.

Well, the point is,
it's either that or the far right.

I'm not saying no
to the prime minister position,

but I have conditions.

It means that we phase out nuclear power.

We reduce flights by 50%.

We require a special authorization
to have a third child

because what do people do?

They have one child,
then two, then three children...

- I completely agree with you.
- ...which means...

All I want to implement
is my "Eat well, for free" law.

- Yeah.
- I want to pay teachers in the 'hood more,

and spread positive vibes
with some social stuff.

- [Yasmine] Great idea.
- Yeah.

That's it. Beyond that, do what you want.
Will you be at the inauguration tomorrow?

No, I can't tomorrow. Can you move it?

No, I can't.

- Oh well, I'll come tomorrow then.
- Corinne, my girl!

[laughs]

Hey, "my girl"?
There's no more "my girl," "my chick."

You hear me?

You don't own me, Stéphane.

- Okay.
- [Corinne] Yeah.

- It was just an expression.
- Yeah, but it's a shitty expression.

- Okay. Okay.
- [Corinne] You gotta stop.

Actually, if you really want,
you could say "my d*ck."

Did you, uh, do the surgery
on your lower body?

No, you can say "my d*ck"
to talk about your d*ck.

[laughs] Oh!

- You scared me.
- You got scared? Why?

What are you afraid of?
What's wrong with you?

Do you have a problem
with people changing their sex?

- No.
- Tell the truth.

[hip-hop music playing]

[reporter] So this is the big day
for President Blé,

{an8}this local youth worker
who comes from a diverse background.

{an8}PRESIDENTIAL INAUGURATION

{an8}He was unknown to the public
three months ago,

{an8}and now has defied all expectations.

{an8}It is today that he will take over
as the 26th president

{an8}of the Republic of France.

Numerous obstacles stand before him.

What's his agenda?

Will he succeed in implementing
his "Eat well, for free" measure?

Will he win the next
legislative elections,

when he doesn't even
have a political party?

{an8}And most importantly,
will he succeed in staying alive?

[panting]

Why are you running next to the car?

- Huh?
- Why are you running next to the car?

Dude, are you crazy? I'm doing my job.

Don't forget, there's a t*rror1st threat
on your head.

Pretty good job.
Now they know which car I'm in.

Huh?

[panting and gasping]

♪ God bless-bless-bless-bless ♪

Damn it, he's got a point.

[playful music playing]

[reporters shouting indistinctly]

- [reporter 1] Over here, please.
- [reporter 2] Please, Mr. President.

[overlapping shouting]

- [reporter 3] Over here!
- [reporter 4] To the right!

[reporter 5] Look up.

[reporter 6] Mr. President!

[Collignon] Welcome, Mr. President.

Okay, so your five-year term,
you're gonna rock it street-style.

I mean, I just want to be myself.
I'm from the 'hood. Everything's cool.

Gotcha. Right on, fam. Right on.

[reporter 7]
Sir, over here, please, Mr. President.

You're from the 'hood.

[reporter 7] Over here!
Look at us over here!

- Can we please go inside now?
- Yeah.

I hate to break it to you,
but being inside won't make it safer.

Smile, big guy. Come on. Smile.

- [laughs]
- [reporter 8] Mr. President!

Just relax.

- I'm trying to relax.
- No, don't worry.

There, a little bit.

Over there.

Right? We're good.

- Over here.
- [Stéphane] Yeah, let's go.

[Collignon] Ah!

- Jean-Pierre.
- Hello.

[Collignon] He's a legend here.

Yes.

That's awesome. So happy.
Where are you from?

Mali, Senegal, Gabon?

I'm from Chambéry, Mr. President.

[Collignon] There.

- [door opens]
- So...

Jean-Pierre introduced me
to "Premier Gaou" from Magic System.

He's a great guy.
This way, I'll give you the tour.

[reporter] Yes, Michel, and while
the two men are meeting in private

{an8}about the fate of our country,
let us show you again this footage,

{an8}these historical images
shot 15 minutes ago

{an8}of a future Black president
going into the Élysée,

{an8}the future president whose clothing style...

[turns TV off]

[woman] I wanted to watch.

[door opens]

Hello.

- Getting braids too?
- Oh no, I'm not...

Oh no, not you. Get out of here.

- Please, wait. Give me a minute, please!
- No. I already know what you want.

You want to take me to the inauguration

to make Stéphane happy
and rejoin his team.

- Yeah, that's exactly it.
- Wow. You're so smart, aren't you?

Amazing. You're the one who's smart.
A genius, really.

The Uber's waiting up front,
we should get going.

- [Marion] No, seriously.
- You won't have time to...

Hey, put me out of your mind.

The Élysée isn't my place.
Stop forcing it, damn it.

Wow.

That is an incredibly cowardly answer.

- [Marion] Excuse me?
- It's so cowardly, what you just said.

- Think so?
- Hell, yeah.

Sorry, but your man,
he's at the Élysée right now,

and he's putting himself on the line
to accomplish something truly unique.

Okay? He's standing up for his values.
He's doing something significant.

- Mm.
- Do you realize where you guys come from?

You come from here, you know?

In the middle flows a river of sh*t here.

It's like a huge sewer.
There's sh*t, there are rats.

- Deformed children.
- All right.

- There are ailments here...
- Okay, all right!

- ...that do not exist in the capital.
- We got it. Enough. We got it. Okay?

You come from the very bottom,

and you have the opportunity
to change things up there.

- g*dd*mn, it's the Élysée! I mean, whoa!
- Okay.

- Okay.
- Would you listen to me? Come on.

I swear, over there,
your man is changing things.

And you? Nothing.
You're putting braids on random people.

Come on, it'll never suit her.
Look at her. Look at her. Look at her.

Braids on her? Are you serious?

You have the opportunity to become
the first Black first lady at the Élysée.

Not to be a cleaning lady. That's big.

["Dernière Escale" by Meryl playing]

Think about it.

[door opens]

View of the gardens, oriented south, so...

Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Stop, stop! Don't! Come on.

What's the matter?

You receive parcel bombs, right?
Death threats from everywhere.

You see a glass of water and you drink it,
all relaxed, just like that.

What if it was poisoned, hmm?

I didn't drink it all.

I mean, I drank it all,
but I discreetly spat it out, so I'm good.

- [Collignon] Oh, that's impressive.
- A little bit like this.

[slurps]

Yes, I got it. You spat it out.
That's nice. Well done. Awesome symbol.

Well done. I mean it.
First day at the Élysée, and you spit.

You spit on France. "Marianne, f*ck you."

No. Actually, I was pretending to drink.

And so I pretended to spit.

It's an old tai chi technique.

The glass is empty.

Hmm?

Do you have something to write the codes?

The codes?

You got it?

Dough.

Underscore.

Nine-four.

Hood-seven-seven.

Those are the nuclear codes?

It's the Wi-Fi password.

Nuclear codes?

- [laughing]
- Yeah.

- Nuclear codes don't exist.
- Yeah, I knew that.

- It's just a myth, you know?
- I know. Totally a myth.

Anyhow...

[groans and clears throat]

- ...you want some?
- No, thanks.

[sighs]

Hold on, hold on,
don't tell me it's drugs.

- Is it CBD?
- [lighter clicks]

Mm...

I don't see the point of CBD.

Well, it's so as to not be high.

[inhales sharply]

Exactly. I don't see the point.

Oh, that joint's pretty strong.

Anyway, I think
we've gone over everything.

Mm...

Good luck to you. I gotta go.

Hold on, hold on.
You can't just up and leave like that.

Do you have any advice to share with me?

- Advice?
- Yes.

What kind of advice can I give you?

Hmm?

Oh, yes. How could I forget?

- There's one very important thing.
- Mm?

It's really something
you gotta be careful about.

[Stéphane] Yeah, I know.

It's about terrorism, the Arabs, all that.

No, no, no, no. The food. The food.
We eat nonstop here.

And a fat president
is unacceptable, right?

Look at me.

Uh, no, it's just my shirt.
It's... Look. It's...

- Ah.
- Otherwise, see? You can go for it.

- Yeah.
- I must say, right here, it's absolutely...

It's solid. Go ahead.
Come on, give it your best shot.

Bam, why not? Give me a good punch.

Mr. President, I'm not gonna hit you.

Hit me. Go for it. What's wrong with you?
Don't you have any f*cking ba*ls or what?

Come on, damn it!

[coughs]

Mr. President?

Mr. President, are you okay?

[wheezing]

[Collignon exhales]

Are you sure you're okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

So...

salads, salads, salads.

- You all right?
- I'm fine, I'm fine.

[clears throat]

You're gonna change clothes, right?

You're not going to the inauguration
dressed like that?

No, it's all good.
I brought something, actually.

- It's gonna be dope. No worries.
- [Collignon] All right. Great.

[dramatic music playing]

[man] Ladies and gentlemen,
the president of the republic.

- [applause]
- Ah, that's it. There he is.

- He looks awesome.
- [Simone] That's my son. My son.

My son.

[Simone laughs]

["Le Bruit de Mon Âme" by Kaaris playing]

[laughing]

{an8}ÉLYSÉE
PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC

- [song ends abruptly]
- [microphone feedback drones]

[chuckles softly]

Hello, everybody.

I'm giving it to you straight.
I won't be rambling on, all that.

I'm gonna cut to the chase
and be real with you, all right?

A lot is riding on my shoulders,
from the cities, to the countryside,

the suburbs, even our French colonies
around the globe.

I'll try to disappoint
as few people as possible.

And I know what the media is saying.
I hear it.

"Stéphane Blé has no political agenda."

Sure, they're not completely wrong.

- Hmm? Come on, man.
- [Stéphane] But I do have an agenda.

I want all French people
to wake up every morning

knowing that France has got their backs,
and they do now.

I want equality, justice,
and good health for everyone.

That's my agenda.
I want everyone to be good.

In fact, my mission
is to improve people's lives.

It's to make France mleh.

[woman 1] What? What does that mean?

[man] What the heck is that?

- [laughs]
- [woman 2] What did he say? "Malé"?

Is it French? "Blue"?

Did he say, "France blé"?

No, no, not France blé, France mleh.

It's... It's Arabic.
"Mleh" means good, fresh, cool.

There, that's what I plan to do
during my five-year term.

In order to do this,
I'm gonna need everyone.

And I need a prime minister
that will be exceptional in her function.

She's present with us.

Corinne Douanier.

[cheers and applause]

[excited chatter]

Make some noise, make some noise,
make some noise for Corinne Douanier!

[woman] Well, that was embarrassing.

[low murmurs]

All right, great. Bad timing.
I guess this isn't the mood.

Uh, all right, let's get started then.

It's best, yes.

♪ Arise, children of the Fatherland ♪

♪ Our day of glory has... ♪

♪ Arrived... ♪

Mr. President of the Republic,

you are hereby nominated as Grand Master
of the Order of the Legion of Honor.

[applause]

♪ The bloody flag is raised... ♪

What are you doing?

♪ The bloody flag is raised... ♪

- No, you're not supposed to wear it.
- It's okay, I'm just trying it on, relax.

♪...in the countryside ♪

♪ Do you hear
The roaring of these fierce soldiers? ♪

♪ They came right to our arms ♪

♪ To slit the throats of our sons
Our friends ♪

[indistinct chatter]

- Congratulations.
- Thank you.

- Congratulations.
- Thank you. Thanks.

Sure. I'm not sure yet, but we'll see...

[dramatic music playing]

[inaudible]

Thanks so much.

Okay. I, uh, I agree
to come live at the Élysée.

But I'm warning you,
I will not be your trophy wife.

Definitely not.

I want Black people's lives to change.
If they don't, there's no point, Stéphane.

- One hundred.
- I want to work on real issues,

deal with real problems,
like colonial reparations, no less.

- Couldn't agree more.
- Okay.

We can talk about it
tonight in bed, if you want.

No, no. What bed? Forget it.
I want my own bed.

I don't think that's possible.
It's not that huge here.

Yes, it is.
There are 10,000 square feet here.

- We'll find solutions.
- There's a lot of wasted space.

- [cell phone vibrating]
- Yeah. Keila's calling me. Hello, Keila?

Yes, girl, I'm at the Élysée. I won't lie!

[Marion laughing]

Have you heard about consent?

You were the one who told me
you wouldn't say no

to the prime minister position.

Yeah, but not saying no isn't saying yes.

But I'm saying yes.

[laughs]

But on one condition.
You preside, but I govern.

And I want a social,
ecological, feminist France.

A France that's mleh.

Yeah.

[Stéphane] All right.

Okay.

But if you don't mind,
I really have to go pee.

I need to go bad.

[upbeat music playing]

[door closes]

[tap water runs]

[both grunt]

["Le Monde Est Méchant" by Niska playing]

So, you dumbass,
is Marianne still a dirty wh*re?

- [song stops abruptly]
- [Stéphane groaning loudly]

That's just stress.

["Le Monde Est Méchant" resumes]

[coughing]

[gasps]

- [song stops abruptly]
- [Stéphane groaning]

- ["Le Monde Est Méchant" resumes]
- [gasping]

[grunts]

[panting]

[groans]

[song ends]

Are you okay, Mr. President?

[breathing heavily]

[wheezing] Are you for real?

I took him down like this, bam!
I put him on the ground.

Then I hit the m*therf*cker.
I hit him hard.

But that didn't stop me.
I'm from the real 'hood.

- People don't know. You catch my drift?
- All right.

What matters right now
is that you're alive, all right?

We shouldn't tell the press
about the as*ault.

Douanier's nomination was well received,

so we're gaining points
for the legislative elections.

Let's stay positive.

A president who knows
how to deliver a punch, pretty awesome.

No, it's not pretty awesome.
This isn't the 'hood or whatever.

We will not talk about the as*ault.

You're absolutely right.
I'm totally in agreement.

- [Yasmine] Thanks.
- Let's stay positive.

And I'm truly sorry.
Yes, there was a little mishap on our end.

But we're definitely
going to get his accomplice.

I don't understand. What accomplice?

[Alice] The t*rror1st
couldn't have done it alone.

There has to be someone
inside the Élysée who helped him get in.

Someone we saw, someone who's among us.

I'm not accusing anyone, of course,

but I'll make it
my personal responsibility.

- [Stéphane] Thank you, Alice.
- Okay, well...

have a good night.

- Bye.
- [Didier] Okay, Stéphane.

Good evening. You're safe now.
At least, you should be.

[Yasmine] We'll work on the ministers'
meeting tomorrow, all right?

Get some rest, do something,
keep yourself busy.

- See you.
- Hold on... Okay.

You guys are all leaving. Okay.

And here I am, alone.

[Jean-Pierre on phone] Yes, Mr. President?

Yeah, uh, do you serve
anything simple to eat,

like a gyro,
a fat burger, or chicken nuggets?

We have poached c*ck fillet
with an oyster mushroom sauce.

- What kind of sauce?
- Oyster mushroom, Mr. President.

[sighs]

Never mind. Have a good night.

Have a good night, Mr. President.

[hangs up]

[door opens]

You got a minute?

Where were you earlier?
I almost got k*lled.

There's been some minor issue.

It was after your speech.

I was looking for t*rrorists
everywhere, you know?

Keeping watch, 360 degrees.

And I saw this weird guy, you know?

He looked like a total n*zi,
for real, with a big head.

So what did I do? I stepped in.

With a chokehold and an armlock,
I neutralized him completely.

I roughed him up a little. And he's there.

[ominous music playing]

Who is it?

At first, I didn't know.
He was talking strange.

Then I looked it up on the Internet.
It's Norwegian.

Why does he speak Norwegian?

- Because he's the ambassador of Norway.
- Oh, f*ck.

You do this to me on my first day?
That's some jail time, your bullshit.

It's okay, we're gonna figure this out.

f*ck, man.

[sighs]

[man humming]

[R&B music playing]

♪ Maneuver, sliding through the mess ♪

♪ Screaming
"One day, I'll be president" ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Maneuver, sliding through the mess ♪

♪ Screaming
"One day, I'll be president" ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Maneuver, sliding through the mess ♪

♪ Screaming
"One day, I'll be president" ♪

♪ Maneuver, sliding through the mess ♪

♪ Screaming
"One day, I'll be president" ♪

♪ Screaming, "One day, one day" ♪

♪ Hey, hey, one day ♪

♪ "I will be the president" ♪

♪ Maneuver, sliding through the mess ♪

♪ Screaming
"One day, I'll be president" ♪

[music ends]