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02x13 - Turn the Other Cheek

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Moral Orel". Aired: December 13, 2005 – December 18, 2008.*
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Follows the titular Orel Puppington, a young, happy-go-lucky and naïve Protestant who showcases his commitment to God, while dealing with the cynicism of his a*usive and alcoholic father, his lethargic mother, and the devoutly Protestant town of Moralton in which he resides.

02x13 - Turn the Other Cheek

Post by bunniefuu »

[ Fanfare ]

Presbo the clown's bible big

Top!

Who's got big feet that
walk with jesus, who says
god bless m-me!

Walk with jesus, who says
god bless m-me!
When he sneezes?

God bless m-me!
When he sneezes?
Who's got his big red nose

When he sneezes?
Who's got his big red nose
buried in the good book?

Who's got his big red nose
buried in the good book?
Who gets you to heaven with

Buried in the good book?
Who gets you to heaven with
his funny, clowny look?

Who gets you to heaven with
his funny, clowny look?
[ Music playing in distance ]

His funny, clowny look?
[ Music playing in distance ]
[ clock ticking ]

Bloberta: [ groans ]

Clay: [ snores ]
bloberta: okay, here we go.
[ Water running ]

[ Laughs ] it's m-me!
Well, hello, presbo, you
silly clown.

Well, hello, presbo, you
silly clown.
Hey, why aren't you up on

Silly clown.
Hey, why aren't you up on
your flying trapeze today?

Hey, why aren't you up on
your flying trapeze today?
Well, today is sunday, and --

Your flying trapeze today?
Well, today is sunday, and --
[bleep]

Well, today is sunday, and --
[bleep]
ow, presbo!

[Bleep]
ow, presbo!
You hit me!

Ow, presbo!
You hit me!
[ Laughs ]

You hit me!
[ Laughs ]
you've got to turn the other

[ Laughs ]
you've got to turn the other
cheek

You've got to turn the other
cheek
ow!

Cheek
ow!
Turn the other cheek

Ow!
Turn the other cheek
ow!

Turn the other cheek
ow!
Show the world how strong

Ow!
Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak

Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak
ow!

You are by simply acting weak
ow!
Inherit all the world

Ow!
Inherit all the world
someday, 'cause you will be the

Inherit all the world
someday, 'cause you will be the
meek

Someday, 'cause you will be the
meek
ow!

Meek
ow!
Show them just how meek

Ow!
Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek

Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek
[ music continues ]

Inherit all the world someday,
'cause you will be the meek
ow!

'Cause you will be the meek
ow!
Show them just how meek

Ow!
Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek

Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek
ow!

When you turn the other cheek
ow!
[ Record scratches ]

Ow!
[ Record scratches ]
...got to turn the other

[ Record scratches ]
...got to turn the other
cheek

...got to turn the other
cheek
ow!

Cheek
ow!
Turn the other cheek

Ow!
Turn the other cheek
show the world how meek

Turn the other cheek
show the world how meek
turn the other cheek

Show the world how meek
turn the other cheek
show the world how strong you

Turn the other cheek
show the world how strong you
are by simply acting weak

Show the world how strong you
are by simply acting weak
inherit all the world someday,

Are by simply acting weak
inherit all the world someday,
'cause you will be the meek

Inherit all the world someday,
'cause you will be the meek
inherit all the world someday,

'Cause you will be the meek
inherit all the world someday,
'cause you will be the meek

Inherit all the world someday,
'cause you will be the meek
ow!

'Cause you will be the meek
ow!
Show them just how meek

Ow!
Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek

Show them just how meek
when you turn the other cheek
you've got to turn the other

When you turn the other cheek
you've got to turn the other
cheek

You've got to turn the other
cheek
ow!

Cheek
ow!
Turn the other cheek

Ow!
Turn the other cheek
ow!

Turn the other cheek
ow!
Show the world how strong

Ow!
Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak

Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak
bloberta: orel puppington, it

You are by simply acting weak
bloberta: orel puppington, it
is far too early.

Bloberta: orel puppington, it
is far too early.
Turn that down.

Is far too early.
Turn that down.
Orel: sorry, mom.

Turn that down.
Orel: sorry, mom.
Clay: [ snoring ]

Orel: sorry, mom.
Clay: [ snoring ]
[ bell rings ]

Clay: [ snoring ]
[ bell rings ]
doughy: say, orel, what did

[ Bell rings ]
doughy: say, orel, what did
you build in woodshop class?

Doughy: say, orel, what did
you build in woodshop class?
Orel: well, I decided to make

You build in woodshop class?
Orel: well, I decided to make
my dad a spanking paddle so his

Orel: well, I decided to make
my dad a spanking paddle so his
pants don't keep falling down.

My dad a spanking paddle so his
pants don't keep falling down.
Doughy: oh, thoughtful.

Pants don't keep falling down.
Doughy: oh, thoughtful.
Uh-oh, here comes that

Doughy: oh, thoughtful.
Uh-oh, here comes that
walt gluegon.

Uh-oh, here comes that
walt gluegon.
He's such a bully.

Walt gluegon.
He's such a bully.
Orel: oh, doughy, he's not so

He's such a bully.
Orel: oh, doughy, he's not so
well, if it isn't

Orel: oh, doughy, he's not so
well, if it isn't
orel pupping-dumb and dopey.

Well, if it isn't
orel pupping-dumb and dopey.
Orel: hi, walt.

Orel pupping-dumb and dopey.
Orel: hi, walt.
Shut your stupid face.

Orel: hi, walt.
Shut your stupid face.
Orel: [ laughs ] good one.

Shut your stupid face.
Orel: [ laughs ] good one.
You sure are --

Orel: [ laughs ] good one.
You sure are --
oh!

You sure are --
oh!
Doughy: say, that wasn't

Oh!
Doughy: say, that wasn't
very...

Doughy: say, that wasn't
very...
Nice.

Very...
Nice.
Orel: hot dog!

Nice.
Orel: hot dog!
Doughy: orel, why do you look

Orel: hot dog!
Doughy: orel, why do you look
so happy?

Doughy: orel, why do you look
so happy?
Orel: because, doughy, now I

So happy?
Orel: because, doughy, now I
can really show walt a thing or

Orel: because, doughy, now I
can really show walt a thing or
two.

Can really show walt a thing or
two.
Oh, yeah?

Two.
Oh, yeah?
Go ahead, turkey.

Oh, yeah?
Go ahead, turkey.
I'm ready.

Go ahead, turkey.
I'm ready.
What are you doing?

I'm ready.
What are you doing?
Orel: well, I'm about to show

What are you doing?
Orel: well, I'm about to show
you a thing or two.

Orel: well, I'm about to show
you a thing or two.
Oh, yeah?

You a thing or two.
Oh, yeah?
Orel: yeah, about

Oh, yeah?
Orel: yeah, about
christianity, and I'm doing it

Orel: yeah, about
christianity, and I'm doing it
by...

Christianity, and I'm doing it
by...
Turning the other cheek

By...
Turning the other cheek
turning the other ch--

[ Moaning ] h*-o-o-o-t dog.

Hi, mom.
Bloberta: how was school
today?

Bloberta: how was school
today?
Orel: great.

Today?
Orel: great.
I got to turn the other cheek.

Orel: great.
I got to turn the other cheek.
Bloberta: hmm, sounds fun.

I got to turn the other cheek.
Bloberta: hmm, sounds fun.
Orel: you bet!

Bloberta: hmm, sounds fun.
Orel: you bet!
You've got to turn the

Orel: you bet!
You've got to turn the
other cheek

You've got to turn the
other cheek
ow!

Other cheek
ow!
Turn the other cheek

Ow!
Turn the other cheek
ow!

Turn the other cheek
ow!
Show the world how strong

Ow!
Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak

Show the world how strong
you are by simply acting weak
inherit all the world someday

You are by simply acting weak
inherit all the world someday
'cause you will be the meek

Inherit all the world someday
'cause you will be the meek
show them just how meek when

'Cause you will be the meek
show them just how meek when
you turn the other cheek

Show them just how meek when
you turn the other cheek
orel: turn the other

You turn the other cheek
orel: turn the other
cheek

Orel: turn the other
cheek
turn the other cheek

Cheek
turn the other cheek
show them just how strong you

Turn the other cheek
show them just how strong you
are by simply acting weak

Show them just how strong you
are by simply acting weak
both: inherit all the world

Are by simply acting weak
both: inherit all the world
someday 'cause you will be the

Both: inherit all the world
someday 'cause you will be the
meek

Someday 'cause you will be the
meek
orel: turn the other

Meek
orel: turn the other
cheek

Orel: turn the other
cheek
turn the other cheek

Cheek
turn the other cheek
show them just how meek when

Turn the other cheek
show them just how meek when
you turn the other cheek

Show them just how meek when
you turn the other cheek
bloberta: smack!

You turn the other cheek
bloberta: smack!
Oh, my gracious.

Bloberta: smack!
Oh, my gracious.
[ Muffled bang ]

Oh, my gracious.
[ Muffled bang ]
clay: not now, orel.

[ Muffled bang ]
clay: not now, orel.
Bloberta: it's bloberta.

Clay: not now, orel.
Bloberta: it's bloberta.
Clay: oh, um...

Bloberta: it's bloberta.
Clay: oh, um...
[ Muffled banging ]

Clay: oh, um...
[ Muffled banging ]
just a minute!

[ Muffled banging ]
just a minute!
[ Metal clanging ]

Just a minute!
[ Metal clanging ]
[ clears throat ]

[ Metal clanging ]
[ clears throat ]
okay.

[ Clears throat ]
okay.
Bloberta: just look at orel's

Okay.
Bloberta: just look at orel's
shirt.

Bloberta: just look at orel's
shirt.
It's the fourth time this week,

Shirt.
It's the fourth time this week,
clay.

It's the fourth time this week,
clay.
It's worrisome.

Clay.
It's worrisome.
I can't be doing laundry every

It's worrisome.
I can't be doing laundry every
day.

I can't be doing laundry every
day.
I'll have to double my detergent

Day.
I'll have to double my detergent
budget.

I'll have to double my detergent
budget.
Clay: what?!

Budget.
Clay: what?!
This is serious.

Clay: what?!
This is serious.
All right, I'll take care of it.

This is serious.
All right, I'll take care of it.
[ Slurps ]

Fakey: yay!
Hey, orel.
Clay: hello, son.

Hey, orel.
Clay: hello, son.
Orel: oh, hi, dad.

Clay: hello, son.
Orel: oh, hi, dad.
Ow!

Orel: oh, hi, dad.
Ow!
Here, shapey.

Ow!
Here, shapey.
Shiny.

Here, shapey.
Shiny.
Go get 'em!

Shiny.
Go get 'em!
Fakey: yummy!

Go get 'em!
Fakey: yummy!
Orel: dad, that's not sh--

Fakey: yummy!
Orel: dad, that's not sh--
clay: orel, you know you

Orel: dad, that's not sh--
clay: orel, you know you
shouldn't upset your mother by

Clay: orel, you know you
shouldn't upset your mother by
coming home with dirty clothes,

Shouldn't upset your mother by
coming home with dirty clothes,
because then your mother talks

Coming home with dirty clothes,
because then your mother talks
to your father, and no one wants

Because then your mother talks
to your father, and no one wants
that.

To your father, and no one wants
that.
Orel: but I have to get

That.
Orel: but I have to get
bloody, dad.

Orel: but I have to get
bloody, dad.
Otherwise, I'd have to fight,

Bloody, dad.
Otherwise, I'd have to fight,
and jesus says, "turn the other

Otherwise, I'd have to fight,
and jesus says, "turn the other
cheek."

And jesus says, "turn the other
cheek."
Clay: ah, yes.

Cheek."
Clay: ah, yes.
Turn the other cheek -- the w*r

Clay: ah, yes.
Turn the other cheek -- the w*r
cry of the fraidy cats.

Turn the other cheek -- the w*r
cry of the fraidy cats.
Orel, the phrase "turn the other

Cry of the fraidy cats.
Orel, the phrase "turn the other
cheek" has been misused ever

Orel, the phrase "turn the other
cheek" has been misused ever
since violence became out of

Cheek" has been misused ever
since violence became out of
style.

Since violence became out of
style.
Orel: it has?

Style.
Orel: it has?
Clay: sure.

Orel: it has?
Clay: sure.
That saying should only be used

Clay: sure.
That saying should only be used
when someone insults you or

That saying should only be used
when someone insults you or
jokes about your wife.

When someone insults you or
jokes about your wife.
Then you should just grin and

Jokes about your wife.
Then you should just grin and
bear it, even laugh if it's

Then you should just grin and
bear it, even laugh if it's
funny.

Bear it, even laugh if it's
funny.
But god doesn't want you hurt.

Funny.
But god doesn't want you hurt.
He needs you to protect yourself

But god doesn't want you hurt.
He needs you to protect yourself
so you can defend his

He needs you to protect yourself
so you can defend his
righteousness.

So you can defend his
righteousness.
Orel: wow.

Righteousness.
Orel: wow.
Clay: you see, you've got to

Orel: wow.
Clay: you see, you've got to
protect yourself before trouble

Clay: you see, you've got to
protect yourself before trouble
starts.

Protect yourself before trouble
starts.
Orel: before?

Starts.
Orel: before?
Clay: yep.

Orel: before?
Clay: yep.
I think you need to give this

Clay: yep.
I think you need to give this
bully of yours the chance to

I think you need to give this
bully of yours the chance to
turn his own cheek.

Bully of yours the chance to
turn his own cheek.
Orel: oh, so it'll be like

Turn his own cheek.
Orel: oh, so it'll be like
I'm teaching him about the

Orel: oh, so it'll be like
I'm teaching him about the
bible!

I'm teaching him about the
bible!
Clay: exactly -- the bible.

Bible!
Clay: exactly -- the bible.
Now, make a fist.

Clay: exactly -- the bible.
Now, make a fist.
Orel: gee, dad, i-i don't

Now, make a fist.
Orel: gee, dad, i-i don't
know.

Orel: gee, dad, i-i don't
know.
Clay: come on.

Know.
Clay: come on.
It's not that bad.

Clay: come on.
It's not that bad.
Why, a fist is just one hand

It's not that bad.
Why, a fist is just one hand
praying by itself.

Why, a fist is just one hand
praying by itself.
Orel: oh!

Gee, I hope I'm qualified to
teach walt about the bible.
Ding, ding, ding, stop and

Teach walt about the bible.
Ding, ding, ding, stop and
pay toll to cross the hall.

Ding, ding, ding, stop and
pay toll to cross the hall.
Doughy: uh, this doesn't

Pay toll to cross the hall.
Doughy: uh, this doesn't
sound very official, walt.

Doughy: uh, this doesn't
sound very official, walt.
Toll gate coming down.

[ Grunts ]
orel: now turn your other
cheek, walt.

Orel: now turn your other
cheek, walt.
Seethat's how it's done.

Cheek, walt.
Seethat's how it's done.
All: hooray!

Seethat's how it's done.
All: hooray!
Okay, make a fist.

Orel: you've got to make
them turn the other cheek
make them turn the other

Them turn the other cheek
make them turn the other
cheek

Make them turn the other
cheek
anytime anyone makes a fist,

Cheek
anytime anyone makes a fist,
you punch them in the beak

Anytime anyone makes a fist,
you punch them in the beak
it just becomes a reflex,

You punch them in the beak
it just becomes a reflex,
'cause there is no time to

It just becomes a reflex,
'cause there is no time to
think

'Cause there is no time to
think
stop violence while you wreak

Think
stop violence while you wreak
righteous havoc on their cheek

Stop violence while you wreak
righteous havoc on their cheek
then they'll turn the other

Righteous havoc on their cheek
then they'll turn the other
cheek

Then they'll turn the other
cheek
they'll turn the other cheek

Cheek
they'll turn the other cheek
they'll learn about the bible

They'll turn the other cheek
they'll learn about the bible
with your holy violent streak

They'll learn about the bible
with your holy violent streak
it's the one-two punch that

With your holy violent streak
it's the one-two punch that
teaches them that they should

It's the one-two punch that
teaches them that they should
keep it meek

Teaches them that they should
keep it meek
they'll be up heaven's creek

Keep it meek
they'll be up heaven's creek
when they turn their other

They'll be up heaven's creek
when they turn their other
cheek

[ Screaming ]

Doughy: gee, thanks for
protecting me from walt the
bully, orel.

Protecting me from walt the
bully, orel.
Orel: it's god's way, doughy.

Bully, orel.
Orel: it's god's way, doughy.
Doughy: oh, handy.

Orel: it's god's way, doughy.
Doughy: oh, handy.
Want to play rock, paper,

Doughy: oh, handy.
Want to play rock, paper,
scissors?

Want to play rock, paper,
scissors?
Orel: why not?

Scissors?
Orel: why not?
Couldn't hurt.

Orel: why not?
Couldn't hurt.
Doughy: ready, go!

Couldn't hurt.
Doughy: ready, go!
Oh, aah, yow!

Doughy: ready, go!
Oh, aah, yow!
Bloberta: dusty, less dust,

Oh, aah, yow!
Bloberta: dusty, less dust,
no dust

Oh! Aah!
Orel: take that, you!
Bloberta: oh!

Orel: take that, you!
Bloberta: oh!
Clay: orel!

Unh!
Orel: aah!
Clay: ow!

Orel: aah!
Clay: ow!
Ow!

Clay: ow!
Ow!
Oh!

Ow!
Oh!
Orel: and here's a little

Oh!
Orel: and here's a little
present from jesus!

Orel: and here's a little
present from jesus!
Clay: [ panting ]

Present from jesus!
Clay: [ panting ]
forget it.

Clay: [ panting ]
forget it.
Save it.

Forget it.
Save it.
Orel: but aren't you gonna

Save it.
Orel: but aren't you gonna
teach me a lesson?

Orel: but aren't you gonna
teach me a lesson?
Clay: no, I'm not.

Teach me a lesson?
Clay: no, I'm not.
Orel: so, what does this

Clay: no, I'm not.
Orel: so, what does this
mean -- you're giving up on me,

Orel: so, what does this
mean -- you're giving up on me,
dad?

Mean -- you're giving up on me,
dad?
Clay: orel, a father never

Dad?
Clay: orel, a father never
gives up on his son, because

Clay: orel, a father never
gives up on his son, because
then he's not really a father,

Gives up on his son, because
then he's not really a father,
and if I'm not a father, all I

Then he's not really a father,
and if I'm not a father, all I
really am is a husband, and

And if I'm not a father, all I
really am is a husband, and
that's practically worthless.

Really am is a husband, and
that's practically worthless.
Orel: uh-huh.

That's practically worthless.
Orel: uh-huh.
Clay: also, you did follow my

Orel: uh-huh.
Clay: also, you did follow my
advice, kiddo, so punishing you

Clay: also, you did follow my
advice, kiddo, so punishing you
would be an admission of

Advice, kiddo, so punishing you
would be an admission of
wrongness on my part, and

Would be an admission of
wrongness on my part, and
believe you me, that ain't gonna

Wrongness on my part, and
believe you me, that ain't gonna
happen.

Believe you me, that ain't gonna
happen.
Orel: so, why did we even

Happen.
Orel: so, why did we even
come in here?

Orel: so, why did we even
come in here?
Clay: well, we had to cast

Come in here?
Clay: well, we had to cast
what's called a smoke screen.

Clay: well, we had to cast
what's called a smoke screen.
Orel: a smoke screen?

What's called a smoke screen.
Orel: a smoke screen?
Clay: yes.

Orel: a smoke screen?
Clay: yes.
It's a valuable tool I use in

Clay: yes.
It's a valuable tool I use in
order to give your mother the

It's a valuable tool I use in
order to give your mother the
illusion that I'm actually doing

Order to give your mother the
illusion that I'm actually doing
my job as your father.

Illusion that I'm actually doing
my job as your father.
Orel: neat!

My job as your father.
Orel: neat!
You're the best, dad.

Orel: neat!
You're the best, dad.
I love you.

You're the best, dad.
I love you.
Clay: oh, sure do.

Well [clears throat] we got
about one more minute in here.

[ Fire crackles ]