01x60 - Educating Goofy

[bunniefuu]

Ah-hyuck!

♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪

♪ Like father, like son ♪

♪ You're always number one ♪

[both] Yes!

♪ There's buddies
There's pals ♪

Yeah!

♪ You always seem to work things out ♪

♪ Can't you see you're two of a kind ♪

♪ Lookin' for a real good time ♪

Whoa!

♪ A real good time ♪

Aah!

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we'll always stick together ♪

♪ Always stick together ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Side by side wherever we go ♪

♪ We're always ready to roll ♪

♪ Now gimme a beat ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we always stick together ♪

Gawrsh!

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Now we're calling everyone ♪

♪ Come along and join the fun ♪

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ Baa ba doo da bop baa ba doo bop ♪

Yeah!

[dog barking]

[Goofy] Now, here's a toughie.
Ah-hyuck! Spell "Mississippi".

"M"...

Um, um...

"I"...

Uh, ooh...

I abbreviated it.

Afraid you won't win the spellin' bee
with that answer, son,

unless the judge works for
the post office. Ah-hyuck!

Well, now let's try another one, Maxie.
Maxie?

I'm sorry, son, but you still have
a few more words to spell.

Who cares about spellin' anyway?

Who cares? I'll tell you who cares.

Just as soon as I figure
a way out of here.

Maxie, spelling's important.

Why, without spellin',
we couldn't tell our names apart,

read the jokes on the back
of bubble-gum wrappers,

or know when a red light's turned green.

Pop, I know what you're saying,
but these are my wonder years.

I shouldn't be cooped up inside.

I should be out
with my friends exercisin'.

Hmm. Never thought of that.

And when I'm rich and famous,

I can hire someone
to do my spelling for me.

The boy makes a strong argument.

Look at you, Dad.
You never even got a degree from school,

and you turned out just fine.

Well, can't argue with logistics
like that.

Well, gotta go. I'm late.

But, hey, I really enjoyed
our little chat, Dad.

Yeah, me, too.

Afraid I haven't set a very good example
for Maxie.

Gotta prove to my son
that education's important.

What am I gonna do?

This ain't no time for reflectin'.
Time to put on your thinkin' cap.

Thanks.

-[grunting]
-[electricity crackling]

Maybe I could come up with somethin'
if I had a for-real education.

[dinging]

Ah-hyuck! That's it!

I'll go back to school,
get my diplomy, and make my son proud.

Gawrsh. I'm brighter than I thought.
Ah-hyuck!

[alarm shrilling]

[coughing]

You can't go to school, Goofer.

You're supposed to help me
hand out fliers for my car lot.

Where are your priorities, man?

Besides, school's just a place
for parents to dump their kids

so's they can get
a little peace and quiet.

I thought it was to get
'em a good education, Pete.

Ha! Don't be so nave.
That's why they invented TV.

P.J.'s learned all kinds of useful stuff
from watching that tube.

Dad, the show's over.

Can I please go upstairs and study?

No. Sorry, Junior.

I checked the TV schedule,
and it's a two-parter.

Ha ha ha! That son of mine,
always tryin' to pull a fast one.

Sorry, Petey.

But I gotta go get me an education
for Maxie's sake.

Yeah. But don't let it go to your head.
Go on and beat it!

I'll find a way to advertise without you.

Whoa!

Whoa-oh-oh!

[P.J.] Ha ha! Hey, I gotta tell you,

it's pretty slick how you got out
of studying for the spelling bee, Max.

Heh heh heh. I know.
I got my dad pretty well trained.

Heh heh heh.

Hey, check out the big kid.

[laughing]

He must be really dumb
to still be in school, huh?

Ah-hyuck!

[both] Nah.

You know, I can't put my finger on it,

but he does look kind of familiar.

Ah-hyuck! Hiya, Maxie. Hiya, P.J.

Dad, what are you doin' here?

I'm goin' back to school
to learn the three Rs,

readin', writin', and recess. Ah-hyuck!

Wanted to surprise ya.

Ya did. Look, look, Dad,
this isn't necessary.

Maybe you should just go home
before, uh, somebody sees you.

[laughter]

Check him out!

Too late.

Friendly bunch.

Think I'm gonna fit in just fine.

Oh. Better get goin'. Ah-hyuck!

Gotta fill out some paperwork
at the principal's office.

Hey, chill out, Max.
I mean, you're totally overreacting, bud.

Yeah, you're right. It's a big school.

I mean, what's the chance
that he'd be in my class?

Infinitesimal,
microscopic, one in a million.

Tough break, Max.

Ohhh!

Well, I see we have
a new face in the room.

Oh, it's not that new. Ah-hyuck!
Had it most of my life.

Would you please stand
and state your name?

Gawrsh! My very first test. Ah-hyuck!

My name is, uh...

Ah-hyuck! Goofy!

Whew! How'd I do?

Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

And now today we'll be
discussing geography.

[class groans]

I want you all to take complete notes.

And if anyone has a question,
please raise your hand.

"Has a question, raise your hand".

Uh, right hand or left?

Uh, right hand.

Is that your right or my right?

Your right.

I'm right about what?

About your hand.

Ooh, better get this down.
School's a lot tougher than I thought.

What a dope.

Hey, Einstein, what are you doing here?

[children laughing]

[laughing]

Check him out.

Ohhh!

And this is an isosceles triangle.

Now, can anyone name
any other geometric figures?

The big kid, can you?

No. I was just wonderin'
if I can change my seat.

Got somethin' lumpy on my chair.

Oh, very well.

Take the empty seat near the window.

[grunting]

Never was very able to
get very far in school.

Ah-hyuck!

What a geek!

Maybe a comet'll hit the Earth
and end all life as we know it.

Nah. Cool stuff like that never happens
when you really need it.

Hey, did you guys get a load
of the big, goofy-lookin' kid?

Ha ha! Yeah. A real dork, huh, Max?

Oh, well...

Whoa!

[Goofy] Mmm. Turkey chow mein.

[laughter]

Max, isn't that your d--

[muffled]

Dweeb? Uh, yeah, yeah.

My dweeb, your dweeb, everybody's dweeb.

Maxie, there you are, son. Ah-hyuck!

Wait a minute.

The big goofy kid's your [snickers] dad?

Only by blood.

[Pete] All day, not one car sold.
I don't get it.

Standin' on your head's

one of the tried and tested staples
of the used car business.

Daddy, did you ever think
about lowering your prices

and selling cars that run good?

Ha ha ha!

Oh, obviously,
you don't know nothin' about business.

Ha ha ha! Kids! Ha ha ha!

Mr P, I need some advice.

You don't say.

So you came to ol' Pete

on account of because
I'm the voice of honesty

and sage advice. Am I right?

Yeah. That and all the other kids'
dads are busy.

[chuckles] That's cute. Have a seat, boy.

[crash]

So, what is it there, Goof Junior?

Pimples, bullies on the playground,
IRS on your back?

Even worse. Dad enrolled in school.
He's in my class.

I see. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Well, it's pretty obvious what's goin' on.

It is?

Yep, yep.

You see, your dad's out
to make you look real bad,

which ain't gonna be hard,
but that way he can teach you a lesson.

Dad wouldn't do that.

Ha! Sure, he would, son.

Why, I use the same tactic
on my kids all the time.

Total humiliation,
it's very effective in child-rearin'.

I just wish he'd drop out,
but I can't tell him

because I don't wanna hurt his feelings.

So it's a matter of, what do they call it?
Sensitivity, huh?

I know! Find a way
to make your dad's life so miserable,

he'll leave on his own.

You think it'll work?

Easy as pourin' sawdust into a carburetor.

Ruin your father's life,
and he'll respect you for it one day.

I guess you're right.

It's my only hope of survivin' school.

[Max] Dad, we need to have
a father-son talk.

Sounds good, Maxie.
So which one do you wanna be?

[sigh] Dad, if you wanna fit in in school,
you gotta change.

I change my socks every day.

Well, every other day.

No. I mean, you gotta get in good
with the teacher,

like try putting a lizard in her desk.

Teachers love lizards.

Gawrsh! Really?

The things you learn in higher education.

And so we use the pronoun "I"
as the subject of a sentence,

while "me" signifies the object of a verb.

Now I'm going to hand out--

[hisses]

Aah!

Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

Who put this lizard in my desk?

It was I-- Uh, I mean me, the big kid.

Well, step up here, big kid.

Congratulations, dear,

on finding such an unusual
species of reptile.

[boy] Check it out.

-I wonder if he'll be my best friend.
-He's not so stupid after all.

Remember, Dad, ask lots of questions,
and don't stop.

There's nothin' too dumb to ask.

All right, before we go to lunch,
does anyone have any questions?

Why do I have fingers?

Why do they call it a blackboard
when it's green?

What do they call these things
at the end of your shoelaces?

If Napoleon had an F-*5,
would he have won the battle of Watergate?

If people didn't have lips,
could they still whistle?

When I wiggle my pencil,
why does it look like rubber?

Big kid, you know,

I like a student
who asks a lot of questions.

Ooh, very good work.

Gawrsh.

Huh?

Remember,
during our field trip at the museum,

touch everything in sight.

Teachers love that.

[man] And over here
is our most current dinosaur exhibit,

the Stephanosaurus.

We've been trying to figure out
to put it together for years.

Gawrsh! Sure is a big feller.

Hmm. Had ingrown hangnails even back then.

[rumbling]

This should do it, all right.

Look at what you've done.

Magnificent work, big kid.

We were on the wrong track the whole time.

Oh, splendid! You get an "A" for this.

[students murmuring]

Is there no justice?

That new big dude is totally k*ller.

-[giggling]
-He's easy on the eyes.

I believe in Goofy.

I'd like to nominate Goofy
for student body president.

But I was supposed to be nominated.

Hey, dudes, what's up?

Ah, Max, we're gonna ask your old man
to join our club.

What about me? You said I could join.

Uh, sorry, Max,
but we only have one jacket.

Um, maybe next year.

Hey, Max, your dad's sure cool. Ah-hyuck!

Yeah, totally. Ah-hyuck!

What'd you guys say?

It's a new fad.

Have a nice, ah-hyuck, day!

[Max panting] Maybe I'm overreacting.

Maybe dad's not intentionally
trying to destroy

what's left of my pathetic life.

[knock on door]

Hey, Peej. I'll be right with ya.

Yeah, yeah. Whatever.

Actually, I'm here to see my best friend.

Huh?

[Goofy] Sorry I'm late Peej.

Ah-hyuck! Just oilin' up my mitt.

Whoa!

Gawrsh! Must have gone
a little too heavy on the 10w-30.

Ah-hyuck!

Yeah, I guess so. Ah-hyuck!

See ya, Max.

I thought I was your best friend.

Ah-hyuck.

Whew. All this brain work
is givin' me a Charley horse.

But it's worth it, knowing I'm settin'
a fatherly example for my Maxie.

Think I hear the boy
hittin' the books now.

It's not fair! Dad's tryin' to ruin me!

He's gettin' better grades,
gettin' better friends!

[stuttering]
But I'm not goin' down without a fight.

No, siree. I'll beat dad at somethin'.

[Goofy] Now spell "Mississippi."

Spelling's important, Maxie.

Not gonna win the spellin' bee
with that answer, Maxie.

That's it. I'll study day and night
and beat dad in the spellin' bee.

[Goofy] Ow!

Independent--

I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T.

Gawrsh. Maxie's sure studyin' hard.

Better brush up on my ABDs.

Wouldn't wanna let him down
at the spellin' bee.

Oh, that was awfully nice of you
to let the school use your car lot

for the spelling bee, peach fuzz.

Yeah. And it's a real cheap way
to advertise my cars, bunny feet.

Ha ha! Soon as this dumb contest is over,

I'll make a killin' sellin' clunkers
to the kids' parents.

[razzing]

Well, good luck, son.
May the best speller win.

Yeah, right.

Guess it's all the excitement.

Maxie must have butterflies
in his stomach, too.

Here, slick. Thought I'd help with
a few words to use in the competition.

What-- "Discount," "warranty," "sedan"--

-What?
-Hey, hey!

They're all real words.
You can look them up.

Whatever.

Welcome to the first annual
Spoonerville spelling bee.

Are the contestants ready?

We'll start with you, M-Millie.

Spell "high-strung."

Um...

Um...

[buzzer sounds]

[sobbing]

Perfect.

Carlos, it's your turn.

Please spell, uh...

"Rebate"?

"Rebate."

I can't take the pressure.

-[buzzer sounds]
-Let me just be a child!

Is that too much to ask?

"Sedan." S-E-D-A-N.

Well, that's very nice, Kathy,

because, you know, it wasn't your turn,
so would you just--

Bob, please spell

"we accept all trade-ins"?

Hey, it's hyphenated.

Let's get back to some real words.

P.J., please spell "continent."

Ahem.

Today and today only, all RVs sold
come with free air-fresheners.

[buzzer sounds]

That's what my dad told me to say, Judge.

We'll take a break
and return for our final round

between those spelling titans,

Max and the big kid.

Congratulations, Maxie.
You're doin' fantastic. Hope you win.

Yeah, right. I'll bet.

Max, dear, you don't look very excited.
Is something wrong?

Wrong? What makes you think
anything's wrong?

It's Dad. He enrolled in school
to make me look bad.

Where did you get a silly idea like that?

Well, I was talking to Mr. P--

Uh, say no more. That explains everything.

Now, Max, your dad didn't go to school
to punish you.

He just wanted to set a good example.

In fact, you know, I think it worked.

It did?

Why, yes. If not for him,
you wouldn't have studied so hard,

and you wouldn't have come this far
in the spelling bee.

Guess I never thought of that.

Oh, no. If I win the spelling bee,
Dad'll be humiliated.

I gotta do something.

You mean Maxie's been sore at me
all this time?

[sighs]
Should have known something was wrong

when he put peanut butter
in my penny loafers.

Gawrsh, if I win the spelling bee,
it'll humiliate Maxie.

I gotta do somethin'.

I know what I'll do.

I know what I'll do.

[both]
I'll lose the spelling bee on purpose!

Gawrsh. Must be an echo in here.

Now for the final round.
If a contestant answers incorrectly,


the other contestant
must answer correctly to win.

Am I being clear?

So, the first word goes to the big kid.

Spell "congenial."

"Congenial."

B-O-A-T.

[Judge] I'm sorry. That's incorrect.

You just spelled "boat," not "congenial."

Aw, shucks!

Always get them two confused.

Max, for the win, please spell "video."

V-I-D...

E-E-E-E-E-E-O.

Oh, come on. He couldn't spell that?

Ahem. Since you've both
answered incorrectly,

we'll move on to the next round.

Ahem. Big kid, spell "lemon."

B-O-A-T.

[crickets chirping]

This turkey better end soon,

or there won't be a sucker
left on the lot.

[Max] "Cat." K-A-T.

No, it is not K-A-T.

You're wrong again over here.
I mean, come on.

Oh, oh, oh! Big kid,
here's one I know you can spell.

Spell "boat." Come on. Go ahead.

B-Z-Z-Q...

And another Q-T.

Ohhh!

All right. Max with an "M,"
listen carefully.

Spell "TV".

I can do this.

T...

X.

[car door opens]

Wait! Come back here!

As soon as it's over, I'll be givin' away
a free tomato with every purchase.

How's that sound?

[coughing]

Ohh!

That goofball is costing me
an army and a leg!

Back to you, big kid.

Nobody can misspell this one.

The word is "I."

Aye!

Did you-- did you say "I?"

That's correct!
The big kid's the winner here.

Come on, give him a hand, folks.

-I love this.
-[wearily] Yay. That's great.

Gawrsh! What have I done?

Congratulations, Dad!
I knew you could do it.

You mean you're not mad at me?

I'm proud of you. And you know what else?

You've convinced me
to do better in school.

I did?

Yep. And I want you to know
I appreciate everything you've done.

And I'm sorry
about all those things I thought.

Me, too. And I didn't
even think of anything.

I promise, Dad, from now on,

to never be embarrassed
by anything you do.

Aw! Ah-hyuck!

Not in front of the whole world.

Good news, big kid.

By winning the spelling bee,

you've acquired enough credits
to graduate.

Gawrsh! Ah-yuck!

Congratulations, Goofy.

Never thought this day would come.

Me, a college gradiate.

Grade school.

Gawrsh!

That's even better.

[audience cheering]

♪ Gimme a beat ♪

[theme music playing]

Yeah!