01x27 - The Ungoofables

[bunniefuu]

Ah-hyuck!

♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪

♪ Like father, like son ♪

- ♪ You're always number one ♪
- yes!

♪ There's buddies,
there's pals ♪

- ♪ Yeah ♪
- ♪ you always seem
to work things out ♪

♪ Can't you see
you're two of a kind ♪

♪ Lookin' for
a real good time? ♪

- ♪ A real good time ♪
- aah!

♪ Report to the goof troop ♪

♪ And we'll always
stick together ♪

♪ Always stick together ♪

♪ We're the goof troop ♪

♪ The best of friends
forever ♪

♪ Side by side
wherever we go ♪

♪ We're always ready to roll ♪

- ♪ Now gimme a beat ♪
- ♪ we're the goof troop ♪

♪ And we always
stick together ♪

- Gawrsh!
- ♪ We're the goof troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Now we're calling everyone ♪

♪ Come along
and join the fun ♪

♪ Report to the goof troop ♪

♪ La do be da bop
la ba do bop ♪

Yeah!

Phew! Nothin' like
a nice, cold sodie-pop

In a big glass of ice.

Whoaaaah!

Come to daddy.

Gotcha! Now for some icy cubes.

Better be careful.

[Grunts]

[Straining]

Phew!

[Clattering]

Gawrsh!

Huh? Empty?

Max!

Once again, inches away
from a clean getaway.

Max, did you put these ice trays
in the freezer empty?

Empty? They're not empty.

Errrgggh!

See?

Come with me, maxie.

What's the big deal, dad?
It's only ice.

Max, you're gonna have to take

Your responsibilities
more seriously,

Even the itsy-bitsy ones.

It's all here
in the family album.

Ohh! The album! Wait, pop!

Seriously!
I'm not worth the trouble.

Oh, it's no trouble, son.

- Now, just have a seat, maxie.
- Swell.

Here's your great-uncle
eliot goof,

The greatest crime buster
of the early 20th century.

Who's this?

even as a child, eliot goof
saw himself as a blazing
beacon of justice.

[Horn honks]

[Whistle blows]

unfortunately,
everyone else

saw him as a dim bulb.

You can cross now.

Ha ha! No way.

I wanna live to be 6.

Uh, keep movin'.

Hey, copper.

What's shakin'? Ha ha!

Uh, nothin'.

- Check again, officer.
- Ha ha ha!

[Gasp]

There ought to be a law

Against troublemakers like you.

[Cries out]

- [Laughing]
- [shouting]

[Straining]

What a goof.

Wait! Get me down from here!

Somebody, help!

though his pride
was bruised,

eliot goof felt
a responsibility

to promote safety
and justice

that could survive
puncture wounds
and total humiliation.

Uh, yeah.
Right, dad.

Be more responsible.
I got it. See ya!

- Hold it!
- Whoa!

I don't want you
to miss the good stuff.

Swell.

chicago, 1929--

a city swelters in a plague
of unchecked crime.

Huh?

sadly, our hero eliot goof

can't even get a job
as bingo referee.

[ba*ls clattering]

B-52.

Eliot goof reporting
for duty, sir.

Uh, sorry, goof.

The position's been filled.

But, hey, maybe you
could get some ice

For this lukewarm soda.

Looks like you've
got a job after all.

The iceman cometh!

Ah-hyuck!

[Whispering]

Drive safely!
Ah-hyuck!

[Eliot goof]
gawrsh.

Pardon me. Did you see some
bank robbers drive through here?

Nope, all I've seen is
a couple of masked men
with piles of moneybags

Wanting to get
out of town.

Well, thanks anyway.

[Neigh]

the willingness to serve

was never far
from goof's heart,

but was always way too far
from his brain.

meanwhile, the city
was in the tight grips

of a powerful organized
crime ring led by frank nutti,

who was once led
by derek the dwarf

until he was filled
with lead by peg doll,

who is now the brains
of the operation.

Ha! I will never tell.

[Generator powers down]

- [Lever clacks]
- spill the cola beans, frenchy.

No, no, and no.

I want the recipe
tout de suite.

[Gasps] first we measure

Bring to a boil
with several pounds of sugar.

Add potassium benzoate,
glycerin-baked coca leaves.

Carbonate to artificial
perfection. voila!

c'est creme cola
de calamite. Magnifique!

[Sighs]

merci, henri!
let's go, doll.

- Ooh! That's my kind o' woman.
- Come out with your hands up!

State your name and occupation!

The name's frank nutti.

Occupation... Nice guy.

Frank nutti?
Men, retreat!

in this town, nobody stood
in frank nutti's way,

least of all, the police.

city hall--
where justice lives

as the chance by-product
of politics.

Extra! Extra!
Read all about it!

Mobsters get away with m*rder
as mayor twiddles thumbs!

How's the re-election
campaign going, mayor?

Hmm. Cute kid.

Here. Catch.

- [Cries out]
- [crashing]

Ah, the miracle of youth.

I'll never be re-elected
at this rate.

- Give me the fbi.
- [Phone rings]

Fbi.

chicago mayor baba here.

i need a man to clean up
this town.

- It's for you.
- No way, jose.

- It's for you.
- Uh-uh.

- No way, jose. You touch it.
- It's for you.

[Overlapping chatter]

It's for you, fester.

Yeah. Fester here--

Whooooaaaaaahhhh!

Godfrey!

Ahem. Agent fester ness

At your service, mr. Mayor.

Oh, you boys
don't waste time.

No, sir. We waste money.

Your mission, son,

Is to put frank nutti
behind bars.

Ha ha ha!
Frank nutti?

Ha ha ha!
That's a good one.

His latest perfidious derring-do

Is selling counterfeit
calamity cream cola.

[Gulp]

F-frank n-nutti?

- Grrrrrr!
- Aah!

I suggest you get a partner
or go undercover.

He's a tough nut
to crack.

Grrrrrr!

Any questions?

Aaaaagh!

I like the boy's
enthusiasm.

[Beeping]

Godfrey daniels,
I've been bugged.

So, the mayor put the fbi on us.

We'll just find someone
to ice this fester ness.

[Coughing]

This stuff tastes horrible!

No.

No!

Not that! Not that!

[Blows landing]

Eww.

[Sniffing]

Get! Scram, you!

♪♪ [Humming tune]

[Yapping]

Hey, there, little fella.

Want a piece of ice?

[Snarling]

Gawrsh, a sodie-pop factory.

Topeka! Ah-hyuck!
I'm in business.

Why, they'll be thrilled
I dropped by.

Oh! Aah! Oh! Aah! Oh!

It's a raid!

- Whoopsie!
- Say your prayers, g-man.

- [g*nf*re]
- [laughing]

Get some of this!
[Laughing]

No! Wait! Don't
touch that switch!

You mean this one?

Whoa!

I just can't believe it.

He sure put the crunch
on the king pin.

Whoa!

I'll just be on my way now.

I don't believe we've met.

[Gulp]

Who are you?

Uh, I'm the iceman.

A professional iceman?

He's no amateur.

Why, sure.
I'll ice anybody anytime.

What're ya doin' here?

Thought I could drum up
some business.

Ice, ice, baby...

I'd like you take care
of some friends of mine.

Absolutely.

There's fingers gillespie,

Trick knee tucker,
face cast freddy--

Cool it, babycakes!
We need you

To ice fbi man fester ness.

Will that be cubed or crushed?

Crushed.

[Gulp]

I gotta hide!

Great story, pop!

We've got a hit man
in the family!

I gotta tell peej.

Pop!

Hold your horsies, max.
The story gets better.

That's what they told
humpty dumpty.

♪♪ [Humming tune]

- it says "pull," ace.
- whoopsie. Thanks.

♪♪ [Whistling]

Aah! My g*n! Where's my g*n?

♪♪ [Eliot whistling]

- [Screams]
- well, where do you want it?

Not the knees!
Anywhere but the knees!

O.k., I'll just
dump it over here.

[Ice cubes clattering]

Y-y-you're delivering ice?

But you trashed
frank nutti's factory!

And they didn't k*ll ya?

Guess I'm what you call
a people person. Ah-hyuck!

You know, the fbi could use

A people person like you.

Gawrsh.

"how to be
a federal agent.

"ah, the dignity and valor

"of the federal bureau
investigator...

"the keeper of justice

in a world of crime
and impropriety."

I love this stuff.

chapter one...handcuffs.

always keep your handcuffs--
or bracelets--

accessible for quick
apprehension of the criminal.

a quick flip of the wrist
is all that's required

to lock the handcuffs
securely.

Whoa!

Ohhhhh...oh!

and always remember where
you've placed the key.

Whoopsie.

chapter two--
the tear gas grenade.

because the tear gas grenade
is a last-resort solution

to extreme cases
of civil disobedience,

the grenade pin is
very difficult to remove.

Oops.

Wah!

Hoo-hoo-hoo!

Boo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

chapter three--
target practice.

My own six-sh**ter!

Come out, come out,
wherever you are!

Ollie, ollie oxen free!

the federal agent holding
his firearm at the ready

must use all his senses to spot
the murderous perpetrator.

Gawrsh!

with justice on his side,

the federal agent holds
his ground.

I dare you to try that again.

only until he's totally
outmanned does he run
for safety.

i said run!

chapter four--
working undercover.

nothing gives an agent
advantage over his adversaries

like the perfect disguise.

blending in inconspicuously
and totally unnoticed

makes the undercover agent
"indefeatable."

Who the heck is that?

Excuse me.
Pardon me.

Aloha.

Goof, you've successfully
completed your fbi training.

You are a federal agent.

And there is an assignment
waitin' for ya.

Oh, boy! An assignment!

Thank you, agent fester!

- Thank you!
- [Kisses]

Yecch! Ugh! Uhhh!

I think I prefer
ingratitude.

Oh! What a lovely
souvenir, huh?

Yeah. Since iceman here
bumped off the fed,

There's no one to stand
in our way.

- From what?
- From blowing up
our competition--

The calamity cola factory!

But you have
their secret recipe.
What went wrong?

Here. Have a taste.

[Wheeze]
smooth.

Figures.
The only idiot in town
who likes the stuff.

Now I gotta reconnoiter
with fester.

[Ring]

What's the rumpus?

Hey, big mumu.
We got a case 8x20

Fryin' on a low bird song
to the zenith.

Ow!
[Straining]

Well, I should've guessed.

Fbi.

Unhhhh!

- [Whispering]
- huh?

Fester, meet me in the freezer!

What is it?

Well, I'll be.

That nice lady said
there was gonna be

A free pair of cement shoes
here for the both of us.

I don't see any shoes.

[Peg cackles]

eliot goof hits rock bottom,

taking fester ness with him.

- Shut up!
- Shut up!

We're gonna swim
with the fish sticks.

I'd like to go swimmin', too,

But first we better
stop them gangsters.

From blowing up the calamity
cream cola factory.

[Rumbling]

Oh, no! I'm not
ready to go!

I'm still young

And relatively good-looking.
[Sobbing]

[Eliot]
fester!

No, no, please!
I'll do anything!

Fester, that's not
judgment day.

It's our way out.
Come on!

[Eliot]
o.k., Pull...now!

Aaaaaaagh!

Hmm, an ice dispenser.

What a lucky break!

Yeah!

[Frank]
let's put distance between us

And the scene of the crime.

[Gasps]
frank! They got out!

Step on it!

[Honk]

Whoa!
If I didn't know any better,

I'd say them people
was tryin' to k*ll us.

- Aah!
- Aah!

They are tryin' to k*ll us!

Run! We have to warn
the calamity cola factory!

Get 'em!

Come on, doll.
I know a shortcut.

[Panting]

I think we beat 'em.

[Eliot]
uh-oh!

Thirsty, boys?

Aaaghgh! They got me!
I'm a gone goofer.

Goof, goof!
Snap out of it!
It's just cream cola.

Then that's not my heart
ticking like a time b*mb?

No, that's a time b*mb
ticking like a time b*mb!

- [Ticking]
- hope you have
a nice time, kids.

Ha ha ha ha!

Gawrsh! This looks
like a standard fbi
crisis situation.

What do we do first, fester?

Well, now, don't panic.

Let's see.

Chapter five,
"time bombs."

what to do when a time b*mb

ticks closer and closer
to detonation--

panic, you idiots!

- Aah!
- Aah!

[Ticking]

It takes a lickin'
and it's still tickin'.
Now what?

- Run!
- Hey, wait!

The freezer!

Hurry!

- [Ticking slows]
- [ice creaking]

Yeah! We did it!
I thought was gonna end up

Decorating the walls.

This place could use a little
sprucin' up.

We better get
them criminals first.

- How?
- Leave it to
a professional iceman.

Ah-hyuck!

Come on!

Yeow!

- Aaiiieee!
- Whhhoooaahh!

- Who-h*-hoah!
- Aaiiiieeee!

[Fester]
watch out for that bus!

- Whooaahh!
- Aah!

There they are!

[Ticking]

- [Ding]
- oh, no! Hit the deck!

Oh, it's a dud.

You have the right
to remain silent.

But then again,
you have the right
to spill your guts.

Ah-hyuck!

Now what do you think, max?

[Teeth chattering]

[Cat yowls]

[Goofy]
gawrsh!

Whoa! Waffles!

[Yowls]

Well, gawrsh.
Looks like I left
the freezer door open.

Well, it wasn't very
responsible of you, pop,

But at least now
we've got plenty of ice.

♪ Gimme a beat ♪

Yeah!