03x13 - Plenty of Fish in the Sea

[bunniefuu]

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who else have you got

mmm Andrea Phelps a sixth-grader come on

k*ll I got an image to protect

come on Ollie she's real mature for a

race and she thinks she looked like

Donnie most I don't know I mean this is

a lot of trouble to be going through for

a stupid Valentine's dance

you really think Karen would go with me

only one way to find out um maybe I

should work up to Karen she's so cool

yeah I'll start with that girl from

India with the red dot on her forehead

come on Olli

Karen's your first choice call her up

swing for the fences uh what what say

again all right we'll go through it one

more time I'll be Karen I'm wearing a

sweater now be positive and aggressive

and tell me how pretty I am girls love

that stuff ring hello hi Karen this is

Oliver Cleaver you know you really are

the prettiest girl in the class and well

I'd love to take you to the Valentine's

dance a week from Saturday

I'd love to thanks for calling see how

easy it is now collar up while you're

still hot oh no what are you doing

hi uh this is oliver cleaver you know

you really are the prettiest girl in the

class and I

hi mrs. Robbins you really have a lovely

speaking voice its Karen there please

well um now you know her mother that can

only help hi Karen

would you I mean could I look I'm

thinking of running for student council

and I'm taking a poll would you vote for

me fine bye you didn't ask her to the

dance

why should I dance with a girl that

wouldn't even vote for me

[Music]

that's it you're just gonna give up and

throw in the towel

Kelly dating isn't for everyone this

country needs a certain number of

bachelors here hopeless look Kelly what

would happen if everybody went out on a

Saturday night think about it there'd be

no issues at the movies no guy in a

stupid had to deliver your pizza it'd be

total chaos thanks but I'll just spend

the night at Earl's he's working on a

model aircraft carrier and his fingers

are too fat to fit in the bridge oh hi

honey

boys are so stupid all right I know

you'd finally figure that out so well

who tells Duffy you and me Kelly uh

sometimes it isn't easy to pick up a

phone and call a girl can be pretty

scary

wait a minute the boys are today we're

gonna grow into the men tomorrow command

armies play pro football but they're too

scared to ask a girl to dance sometimes

it's worse to get rejected than it is to

get blindsided it's tough I know think

it's easy for us girls right your RC we

have to sit around and wait for the

phone to ring Kelly honey when have you

ever had to wait over three minutes for

your phone to ring you can joke if you

want to but Ollie has no self-confidence

and that could lead to trouble in school

sports and before you know it he's

handing out nametags at a senior prom

hi gasps this is June Cleaver I lost my

partner for this bridge tournament and I

remembered that you dad because I didn't

say that the bridge was on fire okay

guys mom I want to apologize again for

canceling out on the bridge tournament

but I've got so much work to do before

mr. Furr kudos visit can't lumpy helped

that's why I've got so much work Kip in

just 30 minutes I could teach you to

play bridge

I don't think so grandma I mean I still

have trouble with the cap on the aspirin

bottle good evening mrs. cleaver hi

young cube I want to thank you for the

use of your death wish tapes most

inspiring you're welcome mr. Haskell but

I didn't know you borrowed them well

nobody was home but I knew you'd want me

to help myself I don't believe I'm

asking this but Eddie do you play bridge

I'm desperate for a partner tonight at

the bridge tournament me sitting around

bidding hearts with a bunch of old

fogies first prize is $500 I find that a

tug on the ear works very well if you're

long on clubs now I'll show you the rest

of my Science in the car Eddie I don't

cheat mrs. cleaver you wound me I'm

merely suggesting the clear

communication is the bedrock of any

successful partnership good night camp

I'll see you later oh good luck don't

worry we won't need luck

[Music]

hey just the guy I was looking for uncle

Wally if you're wondering about the next

payment for the bodywork on your t-bird

I'll have it Monday no no problem but

what are you doing Saturday night well

you know I was gonna go out with that

Swedish stewardess I've been dating but

I decided now just stay home and study

for my chemistry test yeah well look

this client of mine sent me four passes

to a movie preview and and I was

thinking that maybe you and I we could

double-date Holly come on he's afraid to

walk on the same side of the street with

the girl how's it gonna find a date well

I found maybe you could get anyone you

know that's one of the nicer things you

can do for a little brother come on

uncle Wally the only can ever help him

out I mean I paid for his karate lessons

I gave him my bike I even talked him out

of it when he thought he could jump from

our roof to yours yeah well that's all

well and good kid but shouldn't being a

big brother is an ongoing thing doesn't

stop with saving him from bullies on a

playground

all right let's just suppose that I

could find him a date if we'd never

worked out I mean the only movies Ali

likes are the kind where guys carry

around sharp objects look Kip only

doesn't have any self confidence and you

can help him out you know sometimes I

think if I to help your dad out a little

more in his formative years

your mom wouldn't be living in Europe

right now hmm I'll see what I can do

[Music]

using my shirt come on all you've

changed it four times already you don't

have any clean ones left you know really

movie night do you look I told you

Cheryl won't go out with me unless I

bring a date for a little sister and

you're sure she's cute I don't want to

go out with just anyone you know what's

my dates name again Connie Connie and

Cheryl Fox a couple of foxes right can't

miss why do I have to meet her father

why can't I just stay in the car it just

doesn't work that way her father has to

see you before he lets her go out of the

house well if the only judge is people

on appearances I don't want any part of

it

I'm not going look you're not backing

out on this one

look I got a new model of the USS New

Jersey it's got 19,000 parts it's gonna

keep me busy tonight and probably every

other night until I'm 21 hey fine build

your model sure that's gonna do wonders

for your social development hey with any

luck maybe you'll move up to ham radios

and you can talk to other lonely guys

[Music]

only say something to her

it's on your blouse yes it is oh yes

tell there's something I see a lot of

girls wearing them

Paulie what's with you this was a bad

idea this was not a bad idea did you see

the way she looked at me when we were

getting out of the car

Holley you almost put her eye out with a

comb well she shouldn't have been

sitting so close to me you're too

nervous you gotta relax

just be yourself okay wait a second

I got a better idea just watch me and do

what I do

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I'll be there - mom mom we cut it out

again yes

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with southern caucus tomorrow

you can movie huh yeah funny romantic

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let's just do that for cuz my brother

did yeah I see I'm supposed to do

everything he does why what it sounded

like a good idea at first because um

ELISA sort of like my first date really

yeah and you're so pretty and everything

that it's hard for me to relax I think

that's so sweet

you do uh-huh are you different from

other guys I am most guys try be so cool

but you're yourself

[Music]

[Applause]

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good morning you wonderful world

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everything seems so different when

you're in love and it's all due to my

big brother how can Connie and I ever

repay you

shut up and go back to sleep I asked her

to the Valentine's dance she said yes

it's kind of nice to know exactly who

you're gonna grow old with marry have

your children and grandchildren with of

course there's always taxes mortgages

college tuitions for Olli jr. and little

Tracy I wonder how much a paleontologist

makes an hour baby will consider a

simpler life a farm in Connecticut well

bake bread and make our own candles good

idea that'll help save for tuition for

little Tracy but you know what the best

thing is I'm in love I'm in love I'm in

love morning grandma

if you were a girl what would you like

to get from your man well why don't you

pick some flowers from the backyard for

your little friend little friend grandma

grandma grandma Connie is a woman she

deserves the best

fancy first fine jewelry and I'm the guy

that's gonna give him to her hope he

gets out of his pajamas first

[Music]

I'm furthermore Duffy oli gives her a

roast every day walks her to school

waits for her after class sends her love

letters and even sometimes vacuums her

room and at the Valentine's dance he

promises to dance every single dance

with her so what have you done for me

lately don't you top base me Duffy

Guthrie my fingers still green from that

ring you gave me that ought to do it

oh hi Oliver

hi how was that gross we chloroform some

cricket oh my poor little bunny lips

Oliver I have to talk to you

me too you know the last date these days

oh yeah you've been counting too

I've gone by like a shot haven't they

Ollie that's why I have to give you this

it's authentic cubic zirconium you

shouldn't have oh but that's not all you

also get these matching bracelet and

necklace

well I can't accept these sure you can

and there's plenty more where these come

from

what's your hat size however I know you

like me a lot lot I still have our

junior mint from the night we met well I

see that's the problem what you want to

keep it no um the problem is you like me

more than I like you what I've been

meaning to tell you this for the past

few days I don't think we should see

each other anymore

but we love each other Oliver are you

really nice but the gifts and the phone

calls and the Auto Club membership I

just listen othered what about the dance

Oliver it just isn't working

come on the whole world knows about us

even some eighth graders I'm sorry

what about that night at the movies well

don't get me wrong it you're a great

kisser but I think we should just be

friends friends sure well that's fine I

really didn't like you that much anyways

and the jewelry well it was real cheap

and it came with an all-purpose

flashlight and I kept it for myself

I never meant to hurt you

[Music]

goodbye Wow

Ali kissing her right in public you're

the kind of boyfriend every girl dreams

up uh-huh

mrs. cleaver I'm here to throw myself at

your feet hoping that you'll reconsider

and join me at tonight's bridge

semi-finals we really do make quite a

team Eddie you cheat mmm there's that

ugly word again mrs. cleaver I reiterate

those were not signals I actually had a

severe case of heartburn good night

Eddie

Oliver aren't you running a little late

you don't want to keep Connie waiting in

this exciting your younger son's going

to his first dance and it might not have

happened with that Kip's help I really

didn't do all that much although if it

wasn't for me you'd probably have a

lonely shallow life ahead of him look at

you boy that sweater your grandmother

got you looks great Oh Oliver now you be

sure and have a picture taken if you and

Connie at the dance because this is the

night you'll always want to remember

yeah I don't think I'll ever forget this

night here's a few bucks for after the

dance now you be home by 11:00 and call

us if you decide to elope

[Laughter]

oh hey don't forget Connie's Chris aye

thanks grandma it'd look great on her

mm-hmm well don't wait up have fun

[Music]

oli Harrell usual Ben yeah aren't you

supposed to be at the dance tonight my

date dumped me I gambled it loved and

lost yeah women are scary I guess it's

like that song says love is a

b*ttlefield what are we supposed to do

about it

face it Oliver guys like us aren't

getting great-looking we're no good at

sports and we're not in a rock band

there's millions of air plane and boat

models out there and we're gonna build

every one of them maybe he'll be a hobo

ride the rails play the harmonica around

burnin trash cans and what else is there

[Music]

hey loverboy uh you and Connie sneak out

of the dance for an intimate rendezvous

over a milkshake yeah she's in the

bathroom right now oh well then we won't

interfere come on kid let's go uh didn't

Connie like her corsage well it didn't

go with her dress too well had some bugs

mm-hmm she stood you up right no Connie

would never do anything like that

because um

yesterday she dumped me like a truckload

of wet sand that's a tough break ollie

yeah I've never been dumped before hey

it happens to everybody but it really

hurts I could sure use one of those

talks right now you tell me everything's

gonna turn out okay well I know it hurts

but in time you'll get over it that's it

kid you got anything Oh golly dad's

right

it happens to everybody I mean look at

me I've been dumped twice this year

three times no dad you see I told you

Lenora and I mutually agreed to see

other people yeah but I really liked

Connie I understand why she couldn't

like me back

neither do I you're fun you're sensitive

you're a great kid and one day you're

gonna meet a girl that appreciates those

qualities believe me there are plenty of

fish in the sea

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