04x05 - I Are Ghost

[bunniefuu]

All right, ghosts, it's time for your new

assignment. You got to haunt the old

Tallulah Bottoms mansion. Right.

It's the old mansion on Knickers Offski

Boulevard. Correct. So get a move

on. You have one day to haunt her, or

you're fired!Yes, sir. Yes,

sir. We will make you proud, Bob.

Wow, time's already running out. That's

right. Now get your ghostly butts moving!

Come, Baboon. We wouldn't want to be late

for eternity.

This will be our best haunting ever.

Oh, this is it. 17 Knickersoffsky

Boulevard, home of Ms. Tallulah Bottoms.

Isn't Tallulah Bottoms that old D movie

actress?I better refer to the list of

ghostly tactics. Ah, number one, try

the full monkey approach. We say, I are

not that kind of monkey. No, No no

We ring the doorbell, the person opens

the door, and we scare them with a timely

boo.

Gone, kids! Leave me alone! A

great actress like Tallulah Bottoms

should not be disturbed.

Bull.

Monster Lady g*ng yet?This is

going to be a long day.

Oh, there I am.

Mon Cherie, where were you the night of

the m*rder?

Um, uh.. Oh, oh, Mr. Detective, I

know who did it. She did it! Oh,

cack-cack, you gave away the ending.

Oh, oh, absolutely brilliant,

darling.

Tactic number two, scare the person by

engaging in part of their daily routine.

Oh, oh, oh, here comes the line.

That line almost won me the Oscar!

May I tell you a quit?No, that

was perfect! I was

brilliant! I should have won the Oscar!

Instead went to that guy... Clark

Gable! I are scared.

Aren't you ashamed?You're a ghost!

You're supposed to scare her. Now get

over there to the projector and scare the

pants off of Ms. Bottoms.

I wanted me to win! Oh,

goodie! Another scene with me!

Oh, look at that! My greatest dance

debut! Full moon of

Kentucky! Oh, oh, oh, look at those

moves! Oh, that leap!

Oh, it's better than Fred Astaire!

Noon. not working. Try running it

backwards, IR.

I can hold myself in the palm of my hand.

Jam it, now!

Oh, you beautiful thing! I

embrace you! Come,

Come give Miss Bottoms a kiss!

Oh, no! It's up to me now.

Ha!

Ha! Burgle, burgle. Tweet!

Well, well, where were we?Ah, yes. Let's

try the old... What's

all that noise?Well, it's probably my

overactive imagination. I am an actress,

you know. To Luna Bottoms, queen!

pictures. I am sorry.

No sweat. Well,

there's always tactic number four. Scare

the person by becoming everyday objects.

Now see, here I are. We have a powder

box. What does a powder box need?A powder

puff. That would be you. I are

not a powder puff. I'll tell you what.

I'll play you rock, paper, scissors for

it. What do you say?Loser has to be the

powder puff. Aye, aye, aye, game.

OK, here we go. Scissors,

scissors, scissors. Well, scissors beats

scissors. Oh,

it's time to powder my nose. Now,

scare her now. Ohh

For goodness

sake, baboon. abort mission.

Ohh Nothing has

seemed to work, and it's almost quitting

time. Now it's up to me, for

I was Weasel.

I've got to muster the scariest face that

I can imagine. Here it goes.

I must have been dreaming of my

ex-husband. They just about gave

me a heart attack. I swear that woman is

trying to k*ll me. You ghost! And that's

the only reason I'm still alive.

I are guessing we're losing job now.

What are they going to do?k*ll us?

Tom, look

who's late. I'm gonna have to let you

fellas go. You guys just make bad ghosts.

Why, I even thought of giving you,

Weasel, a second chance. But that monkey

can't go anywhere alone. Why, he's so

inept, he's liable to get himself k*lled.

So here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna

give you your lives back.

You know, this life stuff is pretty good.

I really think I could get used to this

again.

Hello! It's me, Tallulah

Bottoms, recently departed. Bob assigned

me to haunt you. Want to listen to my

movie lines?Do you want some fries witha--

May I peel you a quipe?Oh,

CC's my best side. Oh! I'm

ready for my closure.

Oh, oh! I am going to