08x04 - Jane Finds Elly a Man

[bunniefuu]

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all that is black gold Texas Tea

well the first thing you know old gems a

millionaire the chemical said can't move

away from there said California is at

least you ought to be sold and loaded up

the truck

Hills that is swimming pools movie stars

the Beverly hillbilly

foreign

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vision

Jeff there's a fire going on out yonder

biggest crowd you've ever seen people

from everywhere all kinds of excitement

music playing kidney yelling dog to

barking balloon to pop it

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on that busting loose altarian you want

to go fishing

don't blame you where you going

Jim Owen says they're taking some mighty

big crowd out of Lake tanikumu but

Harold lensley says if bats is biting on

Table Rock or Table Rock team closer

must be a good 12 mile downtown

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just right up in front

over there shorty what's he talking

about I think he wants you get as far

away as he can

get over there and buy that cake that

Ellie made bait I don't want that thing

that ain't the idea you gotta buy it

before some other man buys it I don't

think there's a man in this town can

lift it the road real good that's how

Ellie got it over there

why don't you buy Ellie's cake they keep

making contest is for girls and the

business done by the fellas well Granny

it's gonna look mighty suspicious for

Ellie's own Paul to be buying her cape

why I want you to get all dressed up

nobody will recognize you who had Jethro

ain't here he could not only buy it he's

probably the only living human that

could lift it and eat it

maybe Mr Price gig will come if a

dignified City fella like him and by

Ellie's cake that really cut some ice Mr

guy's daily ain't coming here he's got

his hands full

fritters where have you been feeding

that stupid seal at Ellie keeps in the

pool

don't sit down you forgot to feed the

ghost I haven't forgotten I cooked a

whole pot of goats to it's cooling in

the kitchen what in the world do you

putting goats do everything the other

Critters won't eat fish heads banana

skins rotten apples bones moldy bread

curdled milk rancid meat scraps you name

it it's in there sounds repulsive well

you smell it

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oh greetings Jethro got it Miss Jane

what happened to the goats do I ate it

you ate it

Mr Drysdale I don't want to hurt your

feelings but your cooking is pitiful but

that goat stew didn't even taste like

goat

you could have cooked a pot of garbage

it taste as good as that

this letter from Uncle Jen has got me a

mind to go back to Silver Dollar City

and join him Granny and Ellie

they is eating high on the hog and I'm

eating low on the goat

please miss Gene get me on a plane to

Silver Dollar City quick as you can

Uncle Jed said it's have an affair and

that means pretty girls a cotton candy

in blue

well no Chief I can't very well refuse

him you'll go with him keep an eye on

the clappers don't let them out of your

sight and above all don't let Ellie Mae

get serious about a fella Orvis Dean

them folks back in the Hills ain't going

to recognize me the way I changed really

yeah when I left there I just a big dumb

old hick

hard to believe huh it fairly boggles

come on

I have them little old country girls

eating out at the palm of my hand they

never heard the kind of r*cist stories

that's told in Hollywood

probably not

sure wish I knowed one

well I'm afraid I can't help you with

racy stories but I do know a rather

amusing riddle

let's hear it

well

it's not my sister it's not my brother

yet it's a child of my father and mother

who is it

I give up

would you like to hear Dandy riddle why

yes

it's not my sister it's not my brother

yet it's a child of my father and mother

who is it

I give up it's Miss Jade here

she didn't laugh too hard you reckon

she's heard it before

not the way you told it no

here we are Miss game Silver Dollar City

hotel

picturesque little Hospital in a typical

country in

thanks a lot Mr Stevens yes wonderful

ride

great little place absolutely Charming

Jethro Miss James again we're here Mr

Clement what did you tell me you're

going I sent your telegram some time ago

well I never got it I thought there was

a fair going on here where's all the

people afraid he's all over the cake

baking contest but why are you afraid

because Ellie May has got a cake in her

that is an excellent reason

on my way over to see if I could buy and

get it out of the content

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really created for Mr Cleaner must be

your telegram now machine yeah

that's me are you hurt no I always get

off my bike that way it ain't got no

brakes

I'm gonna tell it riddled Uncle Jed

all right Jethro but this time when you

get to the Finish remember the answer is

you I got it it's dead got a busy riddle

for you you think my sister it ain't my

brother yet it's a child I'm a father

and mother who is it

I give up it's you

he didn't laugh either Miss Jay

I guess you're just too sophisticated

for them Jethro yeah reckon so

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and there's the mill yep that's where

the folks brings their corn and such to

be grounded to me you'd like to see the

inside oh I'd love to

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thank you

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foreign

that's the truth

well howdy and welcome back Miss

Hathaway been outside seeing yes Mr

kellums and I am absolutely in love with

your quaint little Community yeah thank

you ma'am and we might be proud to have

a fine big city lady like yourself thank

you and now I'm going to Don my bird

watching outfit and Venture into the

neighboring Forest now may I have my key

please what keys there

well the key to the room I'm occupying

I'm afraid there ain't no key why not

cause Ain't No Love

d

am I to understand that some local lock

and bar would be free to enter my room

whenever you wished

now did you mention it yeah I reckon he

would

oh

community

with me oh thank you Granny but I'm

going to change and then I'm off to the

forest in search of my Feathered Friends

you know some Indians in these parts

no Grady I'm referring to my winged

friends the birds oh oh yeah well the

woods around here is full of all colors

and sizes I am looking forward to a

thrilling ornithological adventure

and that uses as big words as her

just one Don Richardson he come in here

the other day and thought some words at

me that weigh out better than five

pounds of feet what was they shorty

well

he's talking about this low case and he

said something another was uh

was uh

incompatible overt offense

m is heavy Rascals hey Granny sure it's

good to be eating your videos again

Jethro will know what them big words

means he'd been come through the sixth

grade

incompatible overdose

Ah that's easy all you got to do is

break them words down to their root

meanings

um and come Pat hey bull old bird oh

thanks

what does it mean it means you come in

and Pat a bull and you better get over

the pants

what did I tell you

he's a great one

kid did you get by the cake boost yep

you just smash Ellie's cake out of the

contest too late to bidden it done come

in oh Jed Ellie you'll never get a

husband when Martin gets around about

her cake bacon ready there's nothing I

could do well why didn't you grab an ax

and chop it up might have been a dead

giveaway besides ruining a good act

I'm gonna lose my debt with alverna her

daughter will get married ahead of Ellie

May and she'll get to kick me up Dewey

bald well now don't start howl until the

moon comes up a poor little old Lily

she'll be all made

you feel better about Ellie when you see

what's coming down them stairs

answer the elusive Purple Martin no

answer Jane I got me some eating to

catch up on and after that I got me some

Romancing to catch up on

uh Excuse Me Miss Hathaway you aim to go

into the woods like that

no

rabbit's foot oh leaf clover

the creatures of the forests do not

frighten me

maybe not but she's sure going to scare

the tar out of there

I actually went my way through the

forest to the shores of table

table parents well give them our best is

that the loot Karen oh no no no no no

there and I'm looking for stands in the

water on this long skinny legs and

gobbles up crawdads and frogs in this

enormous mouth

foreign

new Karen it's his twin brother

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see y'all later along oh wait a minute

kiss roll I need your help honey boy

what's the matter granny well I made a

bet with alverna Bradshaw out of her

daughter Big Mouth gets married ahead of

Ellie alverna's gonna get to kick me

cleared at the top of Dewey bald

well that's right on the main road where

everybody can see it that's right an El

Verner will make sure that everybody

knows

there'll be hundreds of people there

watching maybe thousands

what just like a sideshow a circus a

regular Carnival oh bless you Jethro

you're a sweet sensitive darling boy I

know you love your old granny and you're

gonna do something about it ain't you

you bet I am I'm going right over and

talk to Paul Davis

handy maker

he's married already I know that I'm

gonna ask him if I can have the popcorn

concession

Al what yeah expo's been paid forty

dollars for it get out of here right

somebody bought Ellie's cake at Bozeman

wants me to bake him another one just

like it I can't believe it if anybody

knows good cake it's like Bozeman then a

Miller all his life he was a frosting

that Fooly well he did have it decorated

awful pretty well let's quick go buy it

back from him before he tries to cut

into it good idea let's go

how about I think nothing doing I'll

give you twice what you paid for it

sorry but it ain't for sale oh please

Zach where is Ellie's cake right over

there

you're using it for a millstone the best

I've ever had turn it on herb

look at that Rascal chew up corn

I said this ain't getting Ellie married

maybe not but we could always open up a

meal

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I found him I told him that the perfect

man

-made

we waited too long to fetch Ellie May

back to the hills to get a husband all

the good boys

now granny there's still some fish left

in the creek name me one ready

he's running like

the Shelf is at

where anybody are going to the woods

dressed like that like it's not somebody

mistooker for a revenue

everybody knows there ain't no girl

revenuers yeah but not everybody knows

she's a girl

what's the matter

I think I think I found a man for only

me we're balanced in the forest he was

chopping a tree

maybe a bear Chaser or a mountain lion

an Adonis

oh please miss James she's got enough

Critters now you do you don't understand

he was cutting down

it you don't need another beaver

I am talking about a man that she needs

what is a man a veritable Greek god

Greek you mean damn Rich no no his name

is Matthew Templeton oh I tell you he

could have stepped on the pages of a

Shepherd of the Hills young Max

reincarnated a blonde giant priority

where is he he's on his way I invited

her to be Nelly and the rest of you did

you tell him that Ellie was looking for

a husband I I put it a bit more subtly I

told him I knew of a divinely beautiful

young lady who would come back to the

hills to find the right young man and

get married

and that didn't scare him all

right now you see most interesting he

agreed to come to found this is

there he is

that him when the ax across the shoulder

yes

Miss Janey's everything he said he wants

let's run downstairs and grab him I mean

meet him

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hello anybody around yeah

where

right here Oh Daddy I'm looking for

someone I met in the woods uh

howdy man

please make your question my pleasure

sir this here is uh shorty killums he

runs the hotel Mr kellums howdy

act like seeing you around Silver Dollar

City before no this is my first visit to

town spend most of the time in the woods

do you yes ma'am just about every day

but Sunday I reckon you don't see many

pretty girls in the woods no indeed

speaking of pretty girls here comes

Ellie Mae hey look I didn't finish

making my second cake

okay let's get this back in the kitchen

I don't think it's quite ready yet

frosting on this one let's talk about

that in the kitchen

did she say that big thing she was

rolling there was a cake a cake

he uses it to cook on

sounds like she said she was done baking

oh she's done bacon eggs pancakes

that big slab of granite well it's the

old-fashioned way it gives things extra

flavor he's a good cook huh

there ain't nobody can touch that girl's

food

Kelly I'd like you to meet Mr Matthew

Templeton this year's my daughter Ellie

May well how did their real pleased to

meet you mine Miss Clampett

they see everything I said well she's

even more beautiful than you described

her I reckon you two would like to talk

and get acquainted I think that's a very

good idea well you can sit on the porch

upstairs

it's all right with Miss clamp it uh I'd

kind of like stroll around see the

sights see I've never been here before

well I'd be right pleased to show you

around

well thank you I'd enjoy that oh I

wouldn't go inside the mill Ellie

well uh you wouldn't like to get meal

dust over you pretty dressed

but you just take your time and have a

nice visit will you join us for videos

when you get back well thank you I'm

afraid I'm not dressed much like company

oh he looks just fine don't leave yes

ma'am he sure does

I miss you

start overnight fine with me

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oh Miss Jane we'll be holding you

forever and ever you found the perfect

husband for Ellie Mae I certainly hope

so

he's wonderful big strong handsome

hard-working Hill man but apparently

quite cerebral oh well you can't have

everything you know something anybody

that helps one of these Rascals six days

a week is oh man I'll bet he could even

whoop Jethro more important he might be

able to whoop any

well I might to the forest again I'm

hoping to find myself a yellow tufted

broad-backed wood dwelling Pippin

it'll be very scene when I'm Pippin

one just walked out with Ellie

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