06x22 - The Rass'lin' Clampetts

[bunniefuu]

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oil that is black gold Texas Tea well

the first thing you know old Jeb's a

millionaire the Kim folk said can't move

away from there said California is a

place you ought to be solder loaded up

the truck and remove the Beverly Hills

that is swimming pools movie stars The

Beverly Hillbillies

oh

here's Manny's rocking chair and Hart

well put them on the porch Jethro

LMA still looks like there's something

missing well is it the pig yeah that's

it granny it won't feel at home without

them

looks just like back in the Hills don't

it pretty close your host takes some of

the spite out of Granny she's been

honoring her in the setting hand all day

you open your mouth and just snaps your

head up yeah she gets that way about it

once a year I call it the Midwinter

feisties

it's a funny thing about sitting and

rocking and playing on the harp and

singing it generally cheers her up yeah

like the poet says music hath Charmed to

soothe the Savage Beast

oh everybody

I've been looking all over the house for

you

who done that we all did granny

especially for you I'll come cause

you've been sort of cranky cranky me I

ain't never Frankie using a hump right

now

don't hit him no more I think he got him

convinced you're lovable I sure hope she

never turns mean

sit on the porch in rockersville and

play your heart yeah that generally

cools your temper but even Uncle Jed

says he's a Savage Beast don't help me

boy we thought have an old cabin up but

please you you're not fooling me I know

why you put the cabin up to get me out

of the house you want to get rid of them

why don't you just sh**t me like an old

horse and sell my body for glue granny

that's ridiculous yeah you would make

enough glue to put on a postage stamp

don't help people

all right nothing pleases you but that I

cross over Jordan shall be it ready we

don't want that at all

why'd you put my heart

all right I'm on my way to Beulah Land

first let me make my peace with the Lord

[Applause]

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I wanna be

in their numbers

oh

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how would you like to join me in the

chorus how would you like me to call the

police well if you know a couple it can

harmonize get them over here Randy for

years I've done my best to make this the

most beautiful and exclusive

neighborhood in Beverly Hills and you

come up with this

you're a Scourge and a pestilence and an

abomination

sister Drysdale maybe I'm a little over

sensitive but I get a feeling that you

ain't all together pleased

I'm inconsolable oh good I was worried

I'm going to give you an ultimatum well

that's real neighborly of you but I

ain't got nothing ready to give you

what I think of all this debris you

loudest hillbilly now I've got something

ready to give you a couple of them

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look at me

I don't get mad honey but you don't look

much better than you did when you left

when you

you I've been rudely beaten in my hair

nearly torn out of myself

I've always told you those beauty shop

boys hate women I even left a little mud

back on your face

outrageous was perpetrated by that

homicide Little Billy next door

granny you mean granny to destroy you

yes I went over there to complain about

that quality shot they put up

not this time but if you bother the

Krampus once more I will

we about to settle this once and for all

who is most important to you the

trumpets were there 70 million dollars

for me you of course oh thank you

ask a silly question you've got a silly

answer

the same granny what Miss Rossdale I was

protecting our property she was

trespassing or maybe she come over to

talk just want to get something off her

chest she sure did granny was sitting on

it

I'm ashamed of you rolling around

wrestling with your neighbor in the city

women folks don't do that that's a

donkey jet don't help me well it's true

what's more than wrestle in front of

people they even show it on television

lady wrestling yes sir and tonight the

Boston strong girl is going to fight

Rebecca of Donnie Brook Farm he did even

on television City women pick on US

country girls

you don't let the fox in the hen house

now

I sure hope Rebecca wins tonight she

ain't got a chance Uncle Jeff well last

week the Boston stronger what The

Bobbsey Twins Mary Poppins and The

Farmer's Daughter all in the same night

and we better get ready for another

Siege the midwinter feisty

foreign

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all right I don't want to miss nothing

already

he's dancing granny

you could help me talk around yourself

well Grady your enemies got your bed

already out in the cabin thank you

darling thanks for fine I put your hot

toddy on the nightstand that's a good

girl

oh well

I'm ready to turn in me too not me

well uh granny sleepy Plum b*stard

bedtime must be about 7 30. now I'll go

on to bed I couldn't sleep no way

worrying about Rebecca of Donnie Brook

Farm don't worry about her granny she'll

do fine you want a bet

you're helping me again boy

well they don't call that strong girl a

beast of Boston for nothing she's going

to tear that little old country gal to

Pieces well I'm sure granny won't want

to watch nothing like that that won't

bother her she's a doctor

I don't know what I'd do without you

Jethro but I'm willing to give it a try

either go to bed or sit down and watch

with us

like to watch your wrestling though I

got two helpers

can't lick them join them

come in

you said for me Chief oh yes Miss

Hathaway I want you to take these papers

over for Mystic private signature well

with all due respect it is 7 30 and I

don't get paid for overtime well I do

myself and I don't want to miss the

Beast of Boston

she just opened the door for me

thanks you're not going to tell her what

I said yeah no more talk about overtime

pay right right well just who is the

Beast of Boston well it's another name

for the Boston strong girl she's a lady

wrestler

and The Farmer's Daughter all in one

night those are other female Grapplers

yes they're all good too but she's beat

the best pretty red wing the Apache

assassin Nancy Drew the terrible teeny

bopper and tonight he's fighting Rebecca

of Donny Brook Mall good evening ladies

and gentlemen this is Bill Baldwin

speaking to you from ringside of the

beautiful International wrestling Arena

where tonight the backbreaker from Back

Bay the Boston strong girl will meet the

sweetheart at the Smokies Rebecca of

Downey Brook Farm you hear that

Rebecca's from the Smokies that's my

country maybe she's your chair after

this fight she'll be your next account

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referee Jane LaBelle is in the ring and

any moment now our two female Gladiator

those booze and Cat calls can mean only

one thing as here she comes the Beast of

being to miss mean herself the Boston

Strong bear

see what I mean oh isn't she beautiful

she's gonna head up my lone Collision

Department

you can hear the reception this audience

is giving the ever unpopular Boston

strong girl as she passes our microphone

to under the ring we'll see if we can

get a statement would you care to uh

guess you wouldn't thanks for testing

one two three four

don't worry Rebecca

here she comes

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[Applause]

got your little thing ain't you pretty

as a picture what a darling

Boston Strong girls take care of that

Sweet Child she'll answer to me

thanks a lot fellas well ladies and

gentlemen perhaps we can get a statement

from Rebecca

[Applause]

excuse me Rebecca would you care to say

a few words for our audience ah yes sir

thank you sir hello everybody wish me

luck Rebecca I just have to ask you this

question what's a sweet little girl like

you doing in the wrestling business

it's the only way I can pay off the

mortgage on Donnie Brook's Farm

my mom is sick and my daddy's crippled

him

gotta save the home place from that main

event

what a running kid

did you hear what she said this is all I

put on nobody believes it yeah I guess

you're right whoever heard of a mean

Banker

foreign

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yes

why George I think I'm falling in love

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you heard that little Tennessee dial one

more time and I'm gonna give you both

don't sh**t the TV she ain't in there

yeah yeah I just got done wiping off

your Footprints where you tried to kick

her there's a couple of miles from here

over at the international Arena and

Jethro says

yeah yeah when that Bell Rings oh little

Rebecca Donnie Brook Farm is really

going to get stung

intro could be wrong Uncle Jim I'm an

expert I know every wrestling hope they

is good uh see if you can put a lip lock

on yourself

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well ladies and gentlemen order has

finally been restored here at the

international wrestling Arena

the referee has been revived and Rebecca

of Dundee Brook Farm appears to have

recovered from the brutal beating she

received at the hands of the Boston

Strong Girl

there's the warning Bell in just a

moment our two opponents will meet in

the center of the Ring shake hands and

dispatch will be underway

that of course ladies and gentlemen as

The Undefeated Champion the terror of

T-Town strong girl

here is our pretty little Challenger

from the Smoky Mountains Rebecca of

document Farm removing her only pair of

shoes

protect them from possible damage

that coin purse contains all the money

she has saved so far to pay off the

mortgage on Bonnie Brookline

that's a picture of her mother she

always carries into the ring for

inspiration

with this little girl I ever did see

told your mama's sister

how old are you sir

yeah thanks for Britney ready to go at

it

damn Rebecca don't hold no grudge forced

to shake hands with that Beach

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[Applause]

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[Applause]

thank you

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[Applause]

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honey before she ties that around the

road

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Joker

really you know this is a sham nobody

nobody's getting hurt that they've

probably been rehearsing for weeks I

thought I told you to take those papers

it will be a pleasure I cannot stand to

watch that ridiculous Force another

moment

this is going on in here your husband is

fascinated with the Boston Strong Girl

well bless his heart the Boston who

she's a lady wrestler

turn that thing off I can't Margaret the

boss is strong girl is winning how can

anyone of intelligence and reading watch

such trash she's beating up in a smart

alec bad mouth hillbilly oh an

educational program

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looks like a Radcliffe girl

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Rebecca's neck causing the ropes in the

stranglinger the referee is working

furiously to try and save

she's free Rebecca is free but wait a

minute

for referee Costner ropes at her mercy

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that's a picture of Rebecca's mom and

that old something beats don't go hey

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now she's still Rebecca's life savers

She Ain't Gonna Save Old dimebrook Farm

now

somebody come to the front door and he

went to let him in

General come up back with me I can't

stand to look at that violent woman

another minute sit down granny I want to

see what happens I told you I can't

stand violence women

please repeat that

there you are amazing thank you Mr

clevis I'm mostly sorry to have bothered

you but Mr Drysdale thought it was

important

you want to come into parlor and watch

wrestling on the television no thank you

good night all right

well there you have it ladies and

gentlemen the referee has awarded the

first ball to Rebecca of Donnybrook Farm

on a foul and a Boston strong girl is

really Furious don't go away this second

ball is going to be a Lulu

where's granny and Jethro oh great

because she couldn't stand no more

violence she may just required backwards

good good he'll see she gets set for the

night out in the camp let's run over oh

no sir that's gonna have some more oh

well

it's uh what's response

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granny we'll get arrested no we won't

I'm a doctor on emergency call I gotta

put strengths and bandages on that

Boston Strong Girl cheers

[Applause]

oh she's got her now

go back to the hill

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[Applause]

it's all over now ladies and gentlemen

Rebecca will never be able to climb back

into the ring after that terrible

wait a minute

here she comes no it's not Rebecca could

it be her mother

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[Applause]

it's Granny it's Granny come on honey

I'll learn you to beat up on a Tennessee

girl

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[Applause]

[Applause]

foreign

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[Applause]

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[Applause]

sweet kind lovable even tempered

peaceful long-suffering woman granny

puts up a pretty good scrap

[Applause]

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Dominic Da Vinci isn't your average

coroner he'll stop at nothing to uncover

the Mysteries behind the unnatural

accidental and very suspicious deaths no

one escapes the inquest Da Vinci's

Inquest premieres Tuesday night at 8

Eastern on superstation WGN

we're kindly dropping in you're all

invited back next week to this locality

to have a heaping helping of their

Hospitality

hillbilly that is

sellers Bell take your shoes off

welcome back now here

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's presentation

Viacom

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