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01x13 - I. Architect

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "I Am Weasel". Aired: July 22, 1997 – 2000.*
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Series centers on I.M. Weasel, a smart, noble and successful weasel, I.R. Baboon, an unintelligent and rude Hamadryas baboon who is envious of Weasel and often acts as his frenemy, and the mischievous Red Guy, who often antagonizes the duo.

01x13 - I. Architect

Post by bunniefuu »

I, architect. Get

over yourself. Don't

make me mad.

Congratulations, Weasel. You've done a

fine job remodeling the Empire State

Building as the reigning King of New

York. I thank you. This is just the

beginning, King. I promise that by noon

tomorrow, I shall finish remodeling the

rest of Manhattan Island and preserve

this city's historical integrity. Hey,

King Weasel, pose for a couple of

pictures. Oh, Dr.

Weasel, you think he's so big. He's

just a little ant.

Pinch.

Today New York, tomorrow Detroit, and

beyond.

Don't move the brains. I'm a doctor.

Which one goes where?The little one goes

into the little skull. Stupid oohWake

up, you lazy baboon! I

gotta change the sheets for the next

customer!

What on earth are you people laughing at?

Think you're too good for washing windows?

Is that it, baboon?Um, excuse me, I

don't know who you are, but I am not a

baboon. Keep your insults on your face.

Well, ain't we high and mighty?

Cleaning toilets ought to drop you back

down to size?You're demoted!

Holy mackerel! They must have switched

our brains. Ohh

Welcome back, Mr. Weasel. Are you all

right, Mr. Weasel?Another pillow, Mr.

Weasel. Are the drugs wearing off?Need

more, Mr. Weasel?

They think I, Weasel, I'll let

them. So when do you want to resume

renovating New York City, Mr. Weasel?I

remodel Empire State Building first!

But Weasel, you just remodeled the Empire

State Building. In fact, the plumbing was

replaced just last week. The copper in

that building will last a lifetime. If

water pipe lasts a lifetime, whole

building of water pipe lasts

forever!

Hot towels, sir. Why, thank you.

And this is for you. You're a hard

worker, baboon. You'll be a wheel of this

town someday. Mark my words.

Purdy.

Say, Mr. Weasel, what do you want to do

with all these bricks?

Hmm, lots of room inside. Put a

brick on this building!

Beautiful. No wasted space.

No change for plan.

You're a good citizen, Mr. Baboon. Your

government thanks you.

Beautiful.

This good place for a lake.

Fellow citizens, if you elect me King of

New York, I promise to rid the city of

the formerly saintly I Am Weasel and

restore order. of chaos. The

vote is in, and the winner is... I

am the vote!

As the new King of New York, I present

you, Mr. Weasel, with early retirement.

Congratulations. Ah,

for said retired-ment. I

are tired of hard wendy.

I happy to be retired-ment.

I am retired, I am retired, I am

retired!

I am retired, I am retired!

Hey, King Baboon! Pose for a couple of

pictures! I am

Baboon!