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01x07 - Ping Pong at Sea

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "I Am Weasel". Aired: July 22, 1997 – 2000.*
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Series centers on I.M. Weasel, a smart, noble and successful weasel, I.R. Baboon, an unintelligent and rude Hamadryas baboon who is envious of Weasel and often acts as his frenemy, and the mischievous Red Guy, who often antagonizes the duo.

01x07 - Ping Pong at Sea

Post by bunniefuu »

Joe Morocco slams the ball, and Givigar

Bobby returns the serve, like the expert

ping-pong champion that he is. You're

watching Globe of Sports Pay-Per-View

Ping-Pong Tournament, coming to you

direct from Wolverine Lake, sponsored

by Liquid Bread, when you're

half-dead and you need to be fed

Liquid Bread. The score

is tied in this pay-per-view exclusive.

The proceeds for this charity event will

benefit the Rogue Women's Naval

Auxiliary. The money will help buy these

old lady sailors new eye patches and peg

legs. A very good cause indeed.

Joe Morocco is getting aggressive. He's

hammering Garbaby. Morocco attacks.

Morocco scores!

Bad move you make! Open eye,

idiot! Eye better than they.

All I are need is

chance. Beat both player with

single hands.

Oh, the humanity of it all! This

is terrible! Gibby Garma is

down! This is the worst ping-pong

accident I've ever seen in

all my days of ping-pong

sportscasting!

Argh! What am I to do?Without another

player, our fundraiser goes straight into

the drink! We need a replacement!

Help! Replacement! Replacement?

IR must be replacement.

Me, me, me

IR ping-pong star!

Excuse me, ma'am, but I'm a ping-pong

professional. Well, get on

over here, Mr. Weasel.

Thanks for that hip replacement surgery

you gave me. You're a peach.

Why should take Weasel for

ping-pong?pirate lady

should take eye a baboon! I

win game, nut weasel!

Ah, this is the life.

It's me?I won a free trip

to Fiji. I've never won anything

in my whole life. Oh, wow, this is

exciting. You know, my mother won a

goldfish in a bag at a state fair once.

Here's to a good game, my friend.

I are best at ping-pong.

I are score! I are score!

Great serve, Morocco.

He goes to weasel!

Weasel scores again!

Run again! Run again! Run again! You

cheat. I cheat.

To paddle.

Fight those to Weasel!

Could I get your autograph, Mr. Risa?Why,

certainly.

Oh! Time out!

Must win. But how

beat Weasel?Knock, knock.

Occupado?

I'm here for no.

Weasel, one of

a man knee egg

sucker. Egg

sucker! That's it!

I, uh, make weasel suck

egg. And I, uh,

win!

Argh! Stop being a jerk and serve the

ball, I'm running out!

Why not weasel suck egg?You supposed

to be egg sucker. My parents used

to suck eggs. I guess it's just human

nature to rebel against the folks. Don't

you agree?I couldn't say.

All I know is that man is disqualified.

Aye, disqualified?

We only allow regulation ping-pong

ba*ls made from great-fed ping-pongs!

Tag him below, girls, and bring a couple

of ping-pong paddles with ya!

Mercy! I'm mercy for

IR! Oh, you're a mighty

one, weasel! Thank ya!

You can be my cabin boy.