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02x17 - A Tale of Two Havocs

Episode transcripts for the show, "The Villains of Valley View". Aired: June 3, 2022 - present.*
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Vic and Eva have three children named Amy, Jake and Colby and were part of a villain group called the League of Villains that was led by the evil Onyx.

02x17 - A Tale of Two Havocs

Post by bunniefuu »

[bear roaring on TV]

I can't believe you guys
are watching a movie

about a polar bear ninja.

Spoiler alert, it ends with you

not getting the last two hours
of your life back.

I find it delightful.

Anytime the sidekick
is a talking fish, I'm in.

And for your information,
the polar bear's not a ninja.

He's a CIA operative
with a criminal past

who's returned to the streets
to face his mistakes.

He's a polar bear!

Well, it's better
than what you watch.

I never get to watch anything.
You're always hogging the--

-[device humming]
-[Amy & Colby muted]

-What just happened?
-It's pretty neat, huh?

I designed it to sh**t
an invisible laser

that temporarily
silences people.

I call it "The sil*ncer."

Your talent for naming things
truly knows no bounds.

Sorry, kids, can't hear you.

[mouthing]

Oh, this is every
parent's dream.

[sil*ncer device hums]

-Give me my voice back!
-I want a new dad!

Attention, everyone.

I think Amy has something
she wants to tell us.

[chuckles] Okay, fine. You got me.
I put glue in your shoes.

What?

Oh. I guess you haven't tried
to take those off yet.

I just came across
a very interesting video online.

[techno music playing]

Amy, have you been sneaking off
to Centropolis to be a villain?

-No.
-Oh, come on, Amy.

Do you really expect us
to believe some other girl

is running around in
a Havoc suit claiming to be you?

Yes. Look, I don't know
what's going on,

but I think someone's
trying to steal my identity.

Is it really stealing
if nobody wants it?

[theme music playing]

[electricity crackling]

This is so crazy. There's actually someone
out there pretending to be me.

What, so I can't be Havoc
but some rando can?

Yeah, I'm not buying it. This girl's too
upbeat. You're more of a downer

who complains about everyone
and everything.

Well, you know,
I've got to do something

to balance all this out.

Wait, do you think
it's that villain Shadow?

I mean, she did transform into you
when she tried to destroy us.

No, that's impossible.
Starling and I blasted her into the ozone.

Yeah, sometimes
I look up at the stars

and I swear I can still
see her going.

Yeah, I call her "Amy's Comet."

I don't get it.
I'm the Chosen One.

Why would this person
imitate you

when they'd look so much cooler
imitating me?

Oh, probably because they want
to take a shortcut to fame

and not the long road
to obscurity.

I mean, why not copy me?
I was at the top of the Villain 100.

What's that?

It's a list that ranks
the most notorious villains,

-and I wouldn't say you were at the top--
-I was top 10.

I don't even want to know what you did
to get ranked that high.

[chuckles] No, you do not.

Anyway, this imposter's had their fun.

I'd better go stop them in Centropolis
tonight before they tarnish my name.

But my "Save the Bees" auction
is tonight.

I'm raising money to create new meadows
for the bees to forage in.

Oh, that's way more important.
I'll just wait till tomorrow.

Really? Thanks, Amy.

Wait, you're being sarcastic, aren't you?

-Yes. Yes, I am.
-If you're going, then I'm going, too.

You're my sister, and I want to give
this sketchy imposter a piece of my mind.

Are you just saying that
to get out of going to my auction?

Yes. Yes, I am.

She's coming! Hide!

[knock on door]

Hello? Mr. and Mrs. Madden?

They're home.

I can smell their fear.

Hey, Hartley. Hey, Celia. [chuckles]
Why are the lights off?

I don't know.

You see, Jake, this is why we lock
your bedroom door from the outside.

Seriously? Now you're all trying
to get out of going

to my "Save the bees" auction?

Sorry, Hartley, but what have
those bees ever done for us?

They make the honey that you put
in your tea every day.

Oh, well, that's lovely!

Still not going.

Oh, you're going.
To support my grandbaby and the bees.

That's the spirit, Grandma.

Until one of those suckers
stings me,

then they'll be
even more endangered.

-[sighs] Come on.
I could really use the support.

-Uh, Jake will be there.
-That's right.

I finally get to be
an auctioneer.

They command so much power
with that gavel in their hand.

Going once, going twice...
I'm going to the kitchen.

He better know what he's doing.

There's lots of expensive items
to bid on.

I've got my eye
on the trip to Hawaii.

There's a trip to Hawaii?

Not for you.

We'll come to the auction.

[chuckles] Great!

I'm buzzing with excitement.

-Get it?
-[laughs] Yeah, I got it.

Eva, why would you want to waste
our night at that awful auction?

Because we have
the sil*ncer device.

So we can bid low,
silence everyone else,

and then we'll get all
the prizes, including Hawaii.

-You're a genius.
-Thank you.

No, I was talking to myself
for inventing that amazing device.

Come on.

We've looked everywhere.

Why is it so hard
to find this wannabe Havoc?

Yeah, who would have thought
searching an entire city

to find one random person
would be so difficult?

Look, it's her.

Ha! Told you it would be easy.

Hey, Havoc heads.

It's your favorite
supervillain, Havoc.

Come and join me on this live heist
as I bust into this bank.

And let me know in the comments
how much you want me to steal.

Okay, first of all,

I have never been that excited
about anything.

And what kind
of villain announces

what they're gonna do
before they do it? [scoffs] Amateur.

What's next, she gonna try
and pick that lock?

Good thing
I brought my lock pick.

Just one more minute.

Maybe I can help.

Uh... gotta bounce. I'll give you guys
a full recap later.

Don't forget
to like and subscribe.

No, keep going.
I want to see what I do next.

Wow. You're Havoc.

Yeah. I think the real question
is who are you?

Your biggest fan.

My name's Ellie.

Well, hello, Ellie.

So this is really happening?

You're the real Havoc,

and we're both breathing
the same smoggy Centropolis air?

Yep, just two sets of lungs
burning as one.

I like smoggy air, too.

[inhales sharply]

Oh, yeah, that burns.

Wait, How do I know
this whole "obsessed fan" thing

isn't just some elaborate trap?

I have posters of you
all over my room.

I wear red every day
just to be like you.

I even cropped you
into all of our family photos.

You're my stepmom now.

Wow, you are a real fan.

[laughs]
Welcome to your wildest dream.

-Oh! Okay, wake up.
-I don't get it.

If you're just a Havoc fan, why are you
making videos saying you are her?

Hello? Wildest dream. [scoffs]

After you disappeared,
everyone in Centropolis

said that your villain days were over.

Your ranking on the Villain 100 list
even took a hit.

I mean, yeah, everyone dips now and then,
but I'm still top 10, right?

Twelve?

Seventeen-ish?

Ninety-nine.

What? How did I drop so low?

Because right before you disappeared,

you said you were gonna do
the most villainous thing of all time.

Extinguish the beacon light on top
of Superhero Tower. But you never did.

I thought villains don't announce
what they're gonna do before they do it.

Well, yeah, except for when
they want to look really cool.

Everyone started calling you weak
and said that your villain days are over,

which is why you're only beating
one other villain on the list.

Some dude named Flashform.

I made the list! I made the list!

I'm Flashform.

Bit of an up-and-comer.

Can you move?
You're blocking my view of Havoc.

Aw, she's fun. I say we keep her.

Anyways, I had to do something
to keep your legend alive,

so I started making
these impostor videos.

Look, I really appreciate you
having my back, but I didn't quit.

You know, I-I-I've just been
on a secret, long-term villain mission.

I can't tell you what,
but let's just say

Beyoncé might be one of us now.

Well, now that you've met
the object of your weird obsession

and there's clearly no phone number
coming my way, we're gonna bounce.

Wait. Look, I can't leave.

When I chose to stay in Valley View,
I left Havoc behind.

Now people have completely
forgotten about me.

I had no idea how badly
my reputation was suffering.

-There's nothing you can do.
-Actually, there is.

I'm gonna do exactly what I said
I was going to do before I left.

Take a good look at that light
on top of Superhero Tower.

Because once I extinguish
that flame on live stream,

Havoc's name will be
in the spotlight forever.

Can anyone else
feel their retinas burning?

Yeah, seriously. Between the smog
and the blinding light,

how is anyone in this city
still alive?

-[indistinct chatter]
-Oh!

Welcome to my Save the Bees auction.

Oh, dear.
It's worse than I thought.

You dressed the part.

Betty Botter bought some butter.

Betty Botter bought some butter.
Betty Botter bought some butter.

Practicing my auction voice.
Any chance we'll be auctioning off butter?

Okay, to win an item,

the bidders have to raise their paddles
and say their bids.

So once you start the bidding,
I'll silence the competition.

Done and done.

All right, you itty-bitty bidders,

time to send mama to Honolulu.

Hey, Grandma,
I'm glad you're excited,

but everyone deserves a chance.

Please win. I need a break
from this dust bowl of a town.

I wouldn't pack your bags
just yet, Celia.

We need that vacation more
than you, mostly because of you.

Good luck. Everything I own,
I won at an auction,

including my teeth.

-[gavel thumps]
-Okay, everyone.

Take your seats.
The auction is about to begin.

First up, we have a hockey stick signed
by Dustin Brown.

Can I get an opening bid?

I don't know who that is,

but a blunt object
is a blunt object.

I'll bid fif--

[no audio]

I heard a "fif," need a "teen."

I bid fifteen dollars and one cent.

Actually, what are bees
gonna do with a penny?

Just the 15.

Sorry, you have to say your bid
out loud. Rules are rules.

Do you not see this gavel?
I'm basically a judge.

Out of order!

-[loud chatter]
-[sil*ncer device hums]

[chatter silenced]

Going once, going twice,

sold to the person
who calls hockey

"the sport with a flat ball."

Wow, I'm really good at auctions.

Okay, now for the big prize:

a week-long trip to Hawaii.

[no audio]

Fifteen dollars!

Do I hear 20?

We can't hear you!

It's our last item.

Isn't anyone gonna bid
more than 15 bucks

for a week-long trip to Hawaii?

That's like,
$2 per life-changing sunset.

[no audio]

I told you, you have to say
your bids out loud.

Going once, twice...

sold to the lady who definitely
won't be taking me to Hawaii.

[cheers]

Come on, let's grab our stuff
and get out of here.

We've barely raised any money
and your mom's won every item.

Does that seem weird to you?

A bit, but the auctioneering
was flawless,

so I don't know what to tell you.

Now that the auction's over,

we should probably unmute everyone.

Even Celia?

Yeah.

And another thing, I hope you
pasty punks slip off of volcano,

fall into the ocean
and become a shark snack!

Now I kind of wish I heard the rest of it.

Something weird's going on.

I was bidding,
but nothing came out!

Oh, that's a shame.

We'll bring you a puka
shell necklace from the airport.

Hartley, I have a bag
full of cash

and a spirit
that can't be broken.

I am not leaving here
until I win something.

Uh...

Oh, wait! [laughs]

There's one more item
left to bid on.

This, uh, mini projector thingy!

-I don't want that stupid thing.
-We do. Fifty dollars.

Why do you want it?

-No reason.
-One hundred.

-Two hundred.
-Three hundred.

Stop! You're going too fast.

I haven't done
my auction guy thing yet.

Grandma, that's a lot of money.

It'll be fine.
I'll just raise their rent.

I don't know what that thing is,
but I need it.

How about a demonstration?

-How do you work this thing?
-No, Jake, don't!

[no audio]

Going once, twice...

Okay, now they're not
saying their bids.

Don't know what that's
all about, but sold to Celia!

The only thing that beats a Hawaiian
vacation is watching you two suffer.

Aloha!

Okay, I told everyone on my socials

that you'd be going live tonight
to darken the superhero beacon.

This is so great.

It's like having a personal assistant
who worships me.

I can't believe I'm part
of an actual villain mission

with Havoc and Flashlight!

Flashform. It's Flashform.

Hey, don't make this about you,
Flashlight.

Look, your plan sounds great,

but Superhero Tower
is a hundred stories high.

Yeah, you're pretty amazing,

but flight isn't one of the 34
variations of your sonic power.

Did I mention I also edit your Wiki?

Really? Well, then,
here's a little update for you.

Since I've been gone,
I've figured out how to use

my sonic powers
to propel me into the sky.

No way! Just when I thought
you couldn't get any better--

I did!

Okay, but you've barely
even used that power.

And you've never gone that high.

Spoken like a true 100
on the villain list.

Havoc is the best villain
that ever lived.

If she says she knows
what she's doing,

she knows what she's doing.

Thank you, fake me.

Look, I can use my power
to go as high as I want,

and I'll prove it.

-Havoc, look out for that...
-[loud crash]

...fire escape.

[screams, grunts]

Are you okay?

Yeah, of course, I'm fine.

And could all seven of you
please stop talking at the same time?

What are we gonna do?

The live stream
starts in 10 minutes,

and thousands of people
are tuning in

to see you finally darken
Superhero Tower.

Don't worry. I'm ready...

[groan]

...to lie down.
I am ready to lie down.

Ellie, cancel the live stream.

No. Look, my reputation
is already bad enough.

If I cancel now,
everyone will know I'm weak.

We have to make this live stream happen.

Wait, I got it!

Okay, remember when Mom and Dad
used to zip-line

from building to building
to get in and out of heists?

Yeah, of course.

They almost got caught
'cause Dad kept yelling, "Whee!"

Well, I can turn invisible
and run a cable

to the top of Superhero Tower.

Then I'll shape-shift into you,
zip-line over to destroy the beacon,

then I'll zip-line back while
Ellie films the whole thing.

No way. It's too dangerous.

Mom and Dad will never
forgive me if you fall.

-Then I'll do it.
-What?

If there's one thing I've learned

from being Havoc's number one fan,
it's to never be afraid.

You should be. I mean, this zip-line's
gonna be really high.

I'll be fine.

I've looked up to you
my entire life.

I'm not turning my back
on you now.

Let's do this!

That was beautiful.

Your unhealthy obsession with me
is so inspiring.

This auction was a total bust.

We only made enough money
to save eight bees.

Save eight bees, do I hear nine?

Sorry. Reflex.

What kind of projector
doesn't project anything?

Maybe I can crack it open
and strip it for parts.

I hate...

how much I love you.

I was gonna say the same.

Celia, we really want
that projector.

And the more you say
you want it,

the more I want
to be buried with it.

I'm going to the powder room.

Taking this with me.

Jake, you just accidentally
auctioned off

one of your father's devices.

-So that wasn't a projector?
-No.

They're gonna strip me
of my gavel.

[scoffs] You're not a judge.

We used it to silence everyone

so we could win
all the prizes for cheap.

[gasps]
I knew something was off!

[scoffs] I can't believe you ruined
my charitable fundraiser.

And just when I thought
you all couldn't stoop lower,

the floor drops out!

Can we focus
on what's important?

A villain device
is in Celia's hands.

I'll handle this.

Celia, we need
the projector back.

Well, you're not getting it.

You heard the lady.
This deal's done.

Although, some time
on the beaches of Hawaii

might, uh, change my mind.

-Okay, fine. You can have it.
-And all the other prizes.

What? Never. I'm not gonna--

[no audio]

There all yours, dear.

Thank you.

And I will need a ride
to the airport.

Okay, the zip-line's connected
from this rooftop to Superhero Tower.

I had to turn invisible
and super-speed up 200 flights of stairs--

No one cares.
You're still 100.

Okay, Ellie, this is your moment,
which is zip-line across,

destroy the light using this
sonic blast, then zip-line back.

Wait, there's a sonic blast in here?

Not anymore.

Good thing I made a few.

Hurry. The live stream's
about to start.

-You ready?
-[groans, pants]

Yeah, of course.

Wow, we're up high.
Why couldn't the superheroes

put their beacon
on the second floor?

You sure she can do this?
She looks pretty scared.

No, I'm not. I'll be fine.

Look, you don't have to do this.

Yes, I do.

You're my idol
and you need my help.

I can't let you down.

Ellie, wait.

Look, I'm the one
letting you down.

You were just trying
to clear my name,

and all I've done is put you in danger
for my own selfish reasons.

We don't have a choice.
The live stream starts in 10 seconds.

Then I guess my reputation
will just have to take the hit,

because I can't let you do this.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah. I'm sure.

It's all right. I got an idea.

Yo, Flashform here,
and I know you were tuning in

to see Havoc knock out
the superheroes' beacon light.

But instead,
I'm gonna do it to show you

how she taught me to be
the baddest new villain around.

That's right. I taught him
everything he knows.

Which means I'm still amazing.

Probably more amazing,
actually, so...

Guys, I think the superheroes
might have been watching.

They just cut down
the other end of the zip line.

Uh-oh.

And that's why
you don't tell people

what you're gonna do
before you do it.

Now they're flying this way!

Sorry. Technical difficulties.

Remember the name: Flashform.

Okay, we lost them.

They got blinded
by their own beacon.

They should really
rethink that thing.

You know, Havoc,

even though we didn't get
to complete our mission,

I still got to hang out
with my favorite villain.

This was the best night ever!

Yeah, I guess
it was pretty good.

Except for the part
where I ate that fire escape.

But you know something?

I would rather have one awesome fan
like you

than be at the top of some dumb list.

And I'd rather have
one awesome idol like you

than fall to the bottom
of some dumb building.

And just so you know, I'm not gonna make
any more Havoc videos.

As long as you promise
that you'll come back one day

-to shut down the haters yourself.
-You can count on it.

Wait, you hug now?

Please don't put that
on the Wiki.

Yes! I just jumped to 99
on the Villain 100 list.

Really? Well, that means
I moved up, too.

Actually, you dropped to 100.
I'm higher than you now.

-What?
-I thought you said that list was dumb.

Oh, Ellie, if you were really my fan,
you'd know I can turn on a dime.

I can't believe
you ruined my auction.

Not only did you deprive people
from winning prizes,

you deprived the bees.

You seem extra angry.

Celia's not taking you
to Hawaii, is she?

No! She's taking
her boyfriend, Robert!

Did you guys know Amy
was attempting to knock out

the superhero beacon
in Centropolis

-on a live stream tonight?
-No!

Well, you do now.

I thought you were just going
to Centropolis to look for your imposter.

What's this I hear about
a beacon and a live stream?

I don't want to talk about it.

I do. Ninety-nine, baby!

[loud buzzing]

Why is there a beehive
on our front porch?

Oh! Since you prevented me
from raising enough money

to clear a meadow,
the bees live here now.

-Ow!
-Ow!

[sil*ncer device humming]

[no audio]

Never mess with me or my bees!

Where is my backpack?

Oh, there it is.

[voice] Don't move.

I can't believe you dared
to return to Centropolis.

[humming]

No-- [groans]

You're not Havoc.

But I saw the live stream.

Where is she?

She's gone.

Well...

you'd better not tell her
you saw me.

Because when I do come
face-to-face with her...

she's in for a big surprise.

[laughs wickedly]

[theme music playing]