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02x11 - Power Struggle

Episode transcripts for the show, "The Villains of Valley View". Aired: June 3, 2022 - present.*
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Vic and Eva have three children named Amy, Jake and Colby and were part of a villain group called the League of Villains that was led by the evil Onyx.

02x11 - Power Struggle

Post by bunniefuu »

[rock music theme plays]

I still can't believe Dad was a superhero.

Why? 'Cause I'm such an
uber-cool, rebellious villain?

No, because you have,
like, no muscle tone.

Did you ever think that maybe
the superheroes took that away

along with my power?

-Well, did they?
-No.

I can't believe you sacrificed
your only power to be with Mom.

What were you thinking?

No offense.

Oh, none taken.

Besides, I already got my revenge

when I made your breakfast.

That's not sausage.

Wait, he-- he didn't have
the sausage. I did.

Oh, right.

Well, good news, Jake,
you're in the clear.

Aw, she messed with your food.
That means you're family.

[scoffs] I thought superheroes
were supposed to be good.

How could your family make
you choose between them

and the woman you love?

I'm sure Mrs. Madden's family
accepted you.

Nope. They wanted to destroy him.

He's just really good at hiding.

Yeah, with those muscles,

he could hide between two couch cushions.

This completely changes who we are.

I mean, we have superhero blood
running through our veins.

I know, that's why I was
just doing an online search

for "Can I live without blood".

It's gonna get messy,
but it's the right thing to do.

Look, I felt terrible
about keeping it a secret,

which is why I did the noble thing
and told the truth.

No you didn't, I outed you.

And now I'm doing
the villain thing by lying.

Okay, what exactly was
this power you sacrificed?

Well, let's just say
that when your father used it,

things got really hot.

Ew, Mom. We've been over this. Boundaries.

No, she actually means hot.

-Dad was a human flamethrower.
-It was so cool.

I could sh**t fire from my hands.

And a few other places I won't go into.

Does it ever bother you
that we all have a power and you don't?

[blows raspberry] All the time.

I'm, like, what did these goofballs do

to deserve a power more than me?

Oh, you were asking him?

Heh. Sorry.

Sure, there are times
I miss having a power.

But does it bother me?

-It bothers him.
-You're darn right, it does.

But if I really wanted it back,

I could just take my brother up
on his offer.

-What offer?
-He's been keeping

my Silver Flame power
in a vessel in his cave,

and he says I can have it back
anytime I want

as long as I'm willing
to become a superhero again.

Yes! We're gonna be superheroes!

No, we're not.

Look, my power meant everything to me.

But after what my family put me through,

I'm never gonna be a superhero again.

-Never?
-[Maden family] Never!

[theme music playing]

[electricity crackling]

[rock theme playing]

Hey, what are you doing down here?

Oh, is Dad forcing you to sit
through another one

of his mid-life crisis fashion shows

where everything is tight
in all the wrong places?

Uh, I've just been thinking about

how tough it must be for Dad.

I mean, his son is the Chosen One

with tons of powers and he has nothing.

You just had to sneak
that in there, didn't you?

Being humble isn't one of my powers.

Well, you are like a superpower toolbox.

Can't you just let him borrow
one of yours whenever he wants?

I offered, but he told me
it's not the same as having his own.

[scoffs] Dad sacrificed so much.

I mean, we wouldn't even exist
if he hadn't become a villain.

I just wish there was a way
to return the favor.

Ooh, what about a gift card?

What's the right amount
for helping us exist?

Ten's too low, right?

I've got a better idea.

What if we talk to Blue Granite

and convince him
to give Dad his power back?

Trust me, no one can say no
to these puppy dog eyes.

Really? Watch this. No!

I mean, the guy betrayed his own brother.

And he's a superhero.

I mean, I don't trust him at all.

Well, if we know he's keeping
Dad's power in a vessel,

why not just sneak into his cave
and take it ourselves?

Way too dangerous.

If we got caught,
we'd get locked up forever.

No, Colby's right.

Dad risked everything for us.
We should do the same for him.

I'm in.

You know what? I'm in, too.

-So, we're going?
-Oh, we're going.

-Sweet, we're going!
-You're not going.

It was my idea!

He does have lots of powers
that could really help you out.

Oh, so now you're doing it, too?

I guess his Chosen One hype got to me.

Look, powers or not,

you have no experience
fighting a superhero.

We can't afford any mistakes.

Please. I-I'm begging you.

You know I'll never
be considered a true villain

until I go on a mission
against a superhero.

I mean, this could be my only chance.

Look, I know how you feel.

We've both been there. But it's too risky.

I mean, one wrong move and we all go down.

Look, if it makes you feel any better,

we already consider you a true villain.

Now, stay at home like a good little boy

and try not to break anything.

-I can't believe this.
-[Amy sighs]

Oh, and Hartley, we need you to, uh--

Cover for you by distracting
your parents like I always do?

I love the shorthand we have now.

Have you heard from Amy or Jake?

They're not answering any of my texts

and I'm freaking out
that they might need my help.

Uh, Amy sent a message about an hour ago.

-What'd she say?
-She said, "FYI,

we're blocking Colby's annoying texts."

Look, I know you wanted to go,

but you can still be a villain here

by using your powers to help me
distract your mom and dad.

Big deal. I use my powers to pull one over

on my parents every day.

Last week, I used my super speed
to go surfing

while they thought
I was brushing my teeth.

I skip brushing my teeth
to do a lot of things.

You sound proud of that,
and I'm not sure why.

Hey, it paid off.

My nasty breath scared away a shark.

Hey, have you guys seen Amy?

I've got some new outfits
I want to run by her.

[stammers] Uh, she went to the store

to, um, get trash bags.

Because we are cleaning up
the neighborhood.

And you should help us. [chuckles]

Just not in that shirt.

Sorry, Hartley, but you seem to forget

that every time I see you
cleaning the neighborhood,

I lean on my horn and throw
more trash out the window.

That was you?

Next time I'll say hi
before I dump my garbage.

[laughs]

You know what? I'm just gonna call Amy.

Now, where did I leave my phone?

What now? I'm out of lies.
I'm out of lies!

Hartley, there are always more lies.

And relax, I swiped his phone an hour ago.

[objects crashing]

[Vic] Where is that stupid thing?

Smart, that bought us some time.

But what else can we do
to keep him distracted?

Wait. My dad won't go
on a neighborhood cleanup

if you tell him to,
but he will if my mom does.

[scoffs] Your mom's not
cleaning up the neighborhood.

Most of the hazardous spills
around here are hers.

She's at work all day.

Which means I can shape-shift into her

and make him go on the cleanup.

Colby, that's brilliant!

[in Colby's voice]
Of course it is. I thought of it.

Oops, I mean...

[in normal voice] I thought of it.

Yeah, that's never not gonna be creepy.

-Where are you going?
-Ugh.

To get Mom's glasses.

She's too proud to wear 'em,
but I need to see.

[grunts]

[sighs] You know, all that talk about

this being our most dangerous
villain mission,

and it turns out Blue Granite
just keeps his spare key

in a fake rock next to his welcome mat.

Yikes. Look at this place.

You'd think a superhero
would clean up after himself.

This dude's a slob.

Ooh, pizza!

Ah!

I think these toppings
might be compliments of a rat.

Let's just find Dad's Silver Flame vessel

and get out of here.

Oh! Found it.

That's not the vessel.
It's a fancy bottle of hair gel.

[laughs] Yeah, he's
definitely Dad's brother.

-[Blue Granite whistling]
-He's home! Hide!

[grunts]

Hey.

What do you think you're doing?

Uh...

[rock theme playing]

Stand back, Blue...

Wait, what do we call you?
Blue Granite? Uncle Blue?

Granny? No, that's weird.

How about you just call me,
"The Chosen One."

What?

What's up, losers?

Colby, I cannot believe you came
here after we told you not to.

Yeah, yeah, I'm too young,
it's too dangerous,

blah, blah, blah.

And it's not Colby, it's Flashform.

Seriously, respect the hoodie.

I thought you were home with Hartley.

Yeah, so does everyone else.

I shape-shifted into Mom,
so now she thinks Mom is me.

We don't want you here.
You're gonna mess things up.

[scoffs] Well, I'm sure you're
the only one thinking that.

Yeah, I don't agree with him on much,

but this one's a no-brainer.

Well, have either of you found the vessel

that holds Dad's power yet?

No. It could be anywhere.

Oh, so Flashform,

the one who's going to "mess things up,"

is the only person who bothered
to do any research

before embarking on such
an important villain mission?

What research?

This.

It's a clip from that lame
superhero reality show,

Catching Up with the Supers.

I have designed every element
of my multimillion-dollar cave,

right down to the smallest details.

Did somebody say, "mood lighting"?

[romantic music playing]

Ha-ha! That's right.

That's how BG does it, baby!

[romantic music plays]

And that's how Flashform does it, baby.

-Give me that!
-What? No way!

I found it, so I'm gonna
bring it back to Dad.

[grunts] Give it up.
You're no match for my super strength.

-[grunting]
-Ha! Got it!

No, I got it.

Uh-oh.

Oh, where have you been?

You're not even wearing glasses.

I don't need glasses. I can see shapes.

I'm just glad you're back.

I've been avoiding your dad.
I mean, more than usual.

My dad?

Yeah.

[gasps] Oh, I get it.

Committing to the role.

I mean, your husband.

Sorry, but that just sounds really weird.

You're telling me. I'm trying
to wrap my head around it.

What is going on?
Now I can't find Amy or Jake.

And Colby's gone, too.

Oh, well, I'm sure
they'll be back real soon.

While we're waiting, heh,

maybe we should clean up the neighborhood?

[chuckles] No way.
I told you, I'm not doing that.

Yeah, and we're the weird ones.

[giggling] Are you okay, Hartley?

Did you hurt your neck
kissing everyone's butt?

No, I just thought that you might want

to clean up the neighborhood, too.

Why would I want to do that?
I'm just gonna mess it up again.

Where are they?

I'll go see if they're in the lair.

[sighs] What was that?

You were supposed to force him to help me!

-I was?
-Yes, to distract him.

Oh, distract him from what?

Did you lose a few brain cells
while shape-shifting?

The whole reason you morphed
into your mother

was so you could cover for Jake and Amy

while they were off getting
your dad's power,

and you're not Colby, are you?

No.

The real Mrs. Madden?

In the flesh.

But Colby told me
you were working all day.

[scoffs] I'm not sure why.
He knows I have Saturdays off.

Their suits are gone.

Colby tricked me.

He didn't shape-shift into you
so he could distract Mr. Madden.

He did it so he could sneak off
and join Amy and Jake.

We have to find them.

[sighs]

I'd better come with.

You're not finding anything
with those eyes.

How did you get into my cave?

Did you find my spare key in the rock?

Yep.

But it looks so much like a real rock!

Look, we're here to get
our dad's power back,

and we're not leaving until we get it.

Well, I told him I'd give it
to him, just as long as he--

We know what you told him.
And you can forget it.

He's never going back
to being a superhero.

I mean, why would he
after his entire family turned on him?

For starters, they give you your own cave!

Big deal.

Wait, can you customize,

or they have all the same floor plan?

What? You know what, no.

There was once a time when I considered

leaving the villain world
to become a superhero.

You never told us that.

-I thought I did.
-You definitely didn't.

Oh.

Well, surprise!

But it doesn't matter,
because after hearing

what you and your family did to my dad,

I'll never jump sides.

You just saved yourself
a really painful trip home.

Well, since none of you
want to be superheroes,

I guess I don't have a choice.

-You'll give us the power back?
-No.

-Give our dad the power back?
-No.

You're gonna mail the power back.

I'm not giving the power back!

He's holding us for ransom
so he can force dad

to become a superhero, right?

No. But that is a great idea.

Now do you see why we left you at home?

Don't sweat it.

Since you're family,
I would never do that to you.

Aww. See, Havoc?

And you said this guy was a tool.

Oh, don't look at me like that.

You literally walk around
with a giant hammer.

But you are still villains
who can use your power to spread evil.

So as a superhero, I can't just
sit back and let that happen.

Well, then, what are you gonna do?

The same thing we did when
your father went to the dark side.

I'm taking away your powers.

[powers up]

[rock theme playing]

With one push of this button,

I can take away all of your powers.

Man, this is gonna make our
first Thanksgiving together

super awkward.

Why are you doing this?

You already ruined our dad's
life by taking away his power,

do you really have to do it to us too?

Hey, he's the one who's choosing
to keep you as villains.

What'd you expect him to do,
just ditch our villain mom?

No. She can be a superhero, too.

She'll just be that one relative
that we all whisper about

as we pass the gravy.

[shrieks]

Nice try. I saw that
coming from a mile away.

You don't get to be Superhero of the Year

three times in a row for being--

[grunts]

An amateur?

See, I told you guys,

I know what I'm doing.

No, you don't.

Why didn't you take the hammer?

The hammer?
I thought we wanted the vessel?

Uh, you're both wrong.

What good are those
if we don't have powers?

You should have taken the device.

Well, at least I took something.

I don't see you guys grabbing anything.

[overlapped arguing]

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

You guys might want to keep down.

There's a bear sleeping
in the next cave over,

and considering you're about
to lose your powers,

you might not want to wake him.

[Kraniac] Don't even think about it!

Uh-oh.

I'll deal with you later!

You may have taken my power,

but you'll never take them from my kids.

I hate when you do that.

When are you gonna learn your devices

don't stand a chance
against my-- [screams]

I have been waiting so long to do that.

And the yelp was just
the perfect pitch of pain.

Okay, let's get out of here.

No! We're not leaving without Dad's power.

It's right here.

Come on, bro. Take your life back.

-Never.
-I thought you'd be wise enough

to make the right decision.

But you're still choosing
the villain world

over your own superhero family.

I never wanted to choose.

You all forced me to

because the woman I love
is different from you.

But she's a villain. Our enemy.

That's all you see.

But beneath her hard-core villain exterior

are five more layers
of hard-core villain exterior.

But beneath that,
there's an incredible woman

who gave me three amazing kids,

and they're the only family
I'll ever need.

[shrieks]

-Back off, I got it!
-No, I got it!

Doesn't look like you got it.

You just destroyed your father's power.

Forever.

Wait. Forever?

No, Blue.

He destroyed your power.

The only reason you've held on
to that vessel all these years

is so you could use it to lure me back.

That's not true.

For a while there, I forgot I even had it.

Besides, I had a reason.

You may have lost your family,

but in losing you,
I lost part of mine, too.

I want us to be close like we used to be.

I mean, I don't even know your kids.

And I'd make a pretty fun uncle.

Says the guy who was about
to suck my sonic powers

through my skull.

Ah, I was only bluffing.

I don't even know how this thing works.

I was just hoping that one of you

would call your dad
and beg him to change his mind.

Even if they tried,
it wasn't gonna happen.

We'll always be family.

But we're never gonna get along
unless you can get over the fact

that we're different.

Just 'cause we're villains
doesn't mean we're horrible.

-Actually, it kind of does.
-Are we having a moment or not?

Fine.

So, what do we do now?

You act like a real family
and start respecting each other.

Just because you disagree
doesn't mean you can't co-exist.

Maybe you can start by getting to know

your sister-in-law better.

Eek!

Heh. Trust me, it's no walk
in the park for me either.

But if it makes
my husband happy, I will do it.

And if it keeps my brother
in my life, then so will I.

Bring it in, bro.

Uh, got some leftover pizza if
anyone wants to stay for dinner.

Yeah, we're good.

Uh, maybe consider putting down the hammer

and picking up a broom.

Yeah, like a broom is gonna do
anything with this place.

Hey, they really stood up for you.

You've got great kids.

I know.

See you, Blue.

Sorry about the whole zapping thing.

Ah, it's okay.

You had to do it.

[both chuckle]

[screams]

I didn't have to do that one.

Hey, Dad. What you doing?

Oh, I'm just going through this old stuff

from my superhero life.

It's time I get rid of it. I'm ready.

-No, you're not.
-You're right, I'm not.

Please don't make me throw this away.

Look, Dad...

I feel horrible.

Because of me, your power's gone forever.

Colby, it was an accident.

One that could've easily been prevented

if you hadn't treated my power
like a pop fly,

but an accident nonetheless.

I was just trying to prove
that I could be a true villain.

Well, you are.

Being a true villain means

standing up for your villain family,

and that's exactly what you did today.

Thanks, Dad. You're the best.

Oh, Colby, I know.

Whoa, did you just transfer me
one of your powers?

Yeah. Kinetic manipulation.

It's the best one I've gotten so far.

Oh, bud, I appreciate it.

But like I said, this is your power.

It's not quite like having one of my own.

It is your own.

I don't want it back.

What?

You sacrificed for all of us,

and now it's my turn to do it for you.

That power is yours to keep.

[Vic gasps]

I don't know what to say. Give me a hug.

Okay, we don't have to do all that.

Nonsense. Come to Papa.

[straining] You can let go now.

I'm trying.

I think the new power
locked my arms in place.

[grunts]

Hey, I just realized something.

Mr. Madden, you do have a superpower.

The power to help other people.

In fact, every one of you has that power.

So I think we should make up for today

by all waking up at 6:00 a.m.
to do a neighborhood cleanup.

[giggles] I'll bring the trash bags!

Whoa, what-- Hey!

Hey, what is happening? Stop it! [screams]

That's gonna come in real handy.

[theme music playing]