[no audible dialogue]
[inhales]
Ah.
Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.
Don't worry, people. It's 100% beef.
- [bell dings]
- I'm lying.
Nothing's gonna get in the way
of me eating this hot dog.
What am I, pulled pork?
What... What?
I've been pig-napped.
So glad you could make it
to my pig roast, Spider-Ham.
Prepare to be honey "glasered. "
Do you have any last words?
Why, yes, I do.
- You won't get away with this!
- Oh, yes, I will.
- Oh, no, you won't.
- Oh, yes, I will.
- Oh, no, you won't.
- Oh, yes, I will.
Oh, no, you won't. Oh, yes, I will.
- Oh, no, you won't.
- Oh, yes, I will.
- Oh, no, you won't.
- Oh, yes, I will.
- Oh, no, you won't.
- Oh, yes, I will.
And if you'll excuse me,
I've got a hot dog to eat.
[growls]
No one tricks me, not I,
the intellectual genius, Dr. Craw-daddy.
Weird name.
I wonder if it could use a little work.
Oh, really?
I tango with guys like Annihil-ape,
Goose Cannon, The Majestic Cara-boom,
Cyber Billy Goat, Rene-gator,
Baked Clam-urai, Tortoise Bombshell,
Tele-canary, WM-bees,
Nuclear Boar-head, guys like that.
You wanna run with the big hogs,
you gotta nail that pun or you're done.
Now let's see here.
The Craw-ster, Scare-craw, Craw Maga,
that's pretty good.
Uh, I think I like the first one better.
- I don't know.
- I got it!
- How about Dr. Crawfish, Attorney-at-Craw?
- Hmm.
- [grunts]
- [gasps]
It was just a first pass.
[screaming]
[yelps]
- Enough hogwash!
- Now you're getting it.
Hold it!
Am I crazy, or is this the same room
we were just in?
Yeah, we ran out of money,
so I just figured we'd have
every room look the same.
Huh.
Hiyah!
Whoa!
[battle cry]
[wailing]
[yelping]
Well, you mess with the Ham,
you get the hammer.
Now, that hot dog must be getting cold.
What is that? What is that!
I demand full-screen treatment.
Whoa!
[panting]
Hey, I'm standing here!
Didn't you tell your experiments
that it's rude to point, Dr. Ding-Dong?
Whoa! Ow, ow, ow!
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
Hey, guys.
Calibrate your screen every now and then.
Ow, ow, ow!
My outlines. My outlines.
My outlines!
Oh!
Okay. Nobody look.
That's better.
Boy, that was weird.
What? A portal
to another movie's timeline?
I hope I haven't missed
the first 62 minutes!
All I wanted was a hot dog!
[Porker] Oh, come on.
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Spider-Ham: Caught in a Ham (2019)
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