257 - June 20, 1967

[bunniefuu]

[narrating] - My name is Victoria Winters.

There are those who inflict harm upon themselves

in order that others might feel a greater pain.

They debase and sacrifice themselves

for causes that are often futile,

and the instrument of revenge becomes the executioner.

[motorcycle engine revving]

[engine stops]

- Oh. - Hi.

- What do you want?

- Only one reason I'd come up here.

- Is Carolyn expecting you?

- She's always expecting me.

- I'll tell her you're here.

- Hey! Can't I even come inside?

- No.

- That was for me, wasn't it?

- Yes.

- Well, where is he? - He's waiting outside.

- Waiting outside?

Did you tell him he couldn't come in?

- I don't intend to talk about your friend with you.

- In the first place, mother, he's not my friend.

He's my fiancé.

And in the second place, you'll have to talk about him

because he's going to be your son-in-law.

♪♪

♪♪

- Buzz? - Hey, baby!

- What are you doing out here?

- I couldn't get past the door man.

Practically slammed it in my face.

I don't like that, I don't like it at all.

Nobody slams doors on me.

- Nobody is going to, come on in.

- I don't know if I want to go in.

We've got to get going.

- We'll go in just a minute.

- Come on, I don't want to waste no more time.

The others are waiting for me.

- It'll only take a minute.

I want to get a few things straightened out.

I'll make sure those doors are wide open for you

the next time you come up here.

- For that, I'll wait.

I like doors to open for me.

Go ahead, kid, give it to your mother.

Tell her if she's a good girl

I'll give her a ride on my bike.

- Mother, I'd like to get a few basics straightened out.

- Such as?

- First of all, I don't want you to ever close the door

in the face of a friend of mine.

- If your friend continues to come here,

I may go as far as not opening the door at all.

- Then you had better get used to the idea of his coming here

because that's what he's going to do.

- Carolyn, you've made your point very well indeed.

You and the others don't want me to marry Jason.

But nothing is going to stop me.

- Who cares about stopping you?

You want to get married?

Bless you, Mother.

- How long do you intend to keep up this charade?

- This is no charade.

That's my fiancé sitting out there.

The guy I'm going to marry.

- You know very well you're not going to marry him.

- Wait and see.

You're due for quite a shock.

- You're too smart for that.

[strikes piano keys harshly]

I don't understand you.

I don't know you any more.

[strikes piano key sharply]

- Take me at face value, Mother, that's the safest bet.

Oh, Mother.

Things aren't really as bad as you make out.

You'll like Buzz once you get to know him.

- I don't intend to get to know him,

and I'll try to have your marriage annulled

if you go through with it.

[strikes piano keys]

- Perhaps you could have yours annulled at the same time.

- Can't I put some sense in your head?

- I doubt that, Mother.

Because nothing makes very much sense anymore.

You've collapsed my world for me.

And I'm only trying to find a way to survive.

- You can't survive with that creature out there.

- Don't you worry about my survival.

You've got your own to think about.

The only thing I ask you to do is not to tell me

what a wonderful stepfather Jason is going to be to me.

But I can tell you what a wonderful husband

Buzz is going to make.

We're already in agreement about a lot of things...

...such as children.

We're definitely <span tts:fontStyle="italic">not</span>going to have any.

The one thing that I don't think I'd ever be able to stand

would be to have a child and then cop out on it

the way you're doing to me.

- I'm sorry.

- Aren't we all!

Going to have a big wedding, Mother?

- I don't know.

- Wouldn't it be a wonderful idea

if we could have our wedding ceremonies together?

That would be great.

Save money on the preacher, too.

I can just see the four of us standing there.

You and Jason, Buzz and me.

And at the crucial moment our voices repeating,

"I do. I do."

How do you like that, Mrs. McGuire?

- Your friend is waiting.

- Fiancé. Fiancé!

I think we ought to define terms.

- Carolyn.

If I don't marry Jason,

will it put an end to this idiocy?

- I don't know, try me, Mother.

Try me.

- Pardon me. - Hi-ya.

- You look very comfortable.

- I am.

- Well now, I hate to disturb you.

- Then don't.

- Well, I don't intend to step over you.

- You wouldn't step on me, now would you?

- Well, one can never tell what I'm liable to do.

Now, I just might accidentally miss my step

and come down very hard on your shinbone.

That could be very painful.

Ah, but then a young man like you would never feel it.

- But if an accident like that happened,

your ankle could get twisted.

- Oh, but I doubt that, you see,

I'm very fast with my feet.

Good lad, safety first and all that.

Oh, hello, Carolyn.

- Well now, there's a sight, the two bridegrooms.

- Did you hear that, Buzz?

I knew we had something in common.

- Check.

- Well, you two headed out for a night of motorcycling, hm?

- Among other things.

- Well, now, that sounds fun.

- Hey, how about a ride?

- What, me?

Oh, no, I think not.

- Why don't you, Jason?

I'd like nothing better than to see Buzz give you a ride.

And I mean a ride you'd never forget.

- Ah, well, some other time perhaps.

Why, Carolyn, I had no idea

you were so interested in the sport.

I'll have to get you a black leatherjacket

for your birthday.

Or Christmas, whichever comes first.

Excuse me.

- Ready to go?

- I have to fix my hair. - Hey, hurry up, will ya?!

- She intends to go through with it? - Yes.

- She's bluffing. - She is not bluffing!

Jason, if this so-called marriage of ours

is going to destroy my daughter,

I can't go through with it.

- Oh, she's really got you going, hasn't she?

You're playing right into her hands.

Well, let me tell you,

you're going through with this marriage all right.

Nothing's going to stop that.

- I said I'd marry you

because I didn't want to ruin her life by telling her I'd--

I'd m*rder*d her father.

But if marrying you is going to do the same thing,

I may have to change my decision.

- Oh, no, you won't have to change your decision.

Your daughter is playing a little game with you.

A game she might very well play right up to the last minute

to the day we get married.

- I couldn't stand it that long.

- Sure you can, Liz.

She's only testing you to see your weaknesses.

Now, you know deep down that she'll never go through

with anything that might ruin her.

- I don't know.

- You know what this situation calls for is...

...a little handling.

The kind of handling that I'm an expert at.

- What do you think you could do?

- Well, the girl needs a little talking to.

Some advice. Some fatherly advice.

Well, I might as well begin playing the role.

- Jason, please!

- Oh, I won't be too hard on her.

I'll make some sense to her.

Remember, Liz, you're marrying a man who can handle anything.

♪♪

[knocking on door]

- Come in.

- Pardon me.

I was hoping I could have a minute with you.

- I'm not buying any advice today, Jason.

I've already had it from all the local experts.

- Ah, yes, but not the kind I offer.

The fatherly kind.

- How dare you use that term with me!

You know I'll never accept you as that!

- Well, not now, understandably.

But later on you will.

- Never!

- My, look at that temper.

Oh, you're Paul Stoddard's daughter all right.

And it's like Paul Stoddard that you're acting.

- What does that mean?

- I mean, it's the same kind of headstrong thing

that made him run away from here years ago.

And now it's taken hold of you. - [scoffs]

- And it's making you do the very same thing.

- A chip off the old block, hooray for me!

- No, no, Carolyn, I can't shield you now.

Not for what you're doing.

Paul Stoddard's strong, thick-headedness

caused your mother years of suffering, humiliation,

and doubts about herself as a woman.

What a sad comment it is that now her daughter,

with her inherited thick-headedness,

should cause the same kind of pain and add to it

the doubts she'll now have about herself as a mother.

Oh, I tell you, it makes me feel a little sick.

- I'm glad to see that something makes you sick.

- Carolyn, why do you resent me so?

- That's too mild a word to describe

the way I feel about you, Jason.

- But we have one thing in common.

We're both concerned about your mother's welfare.

- I know I'm concerned about my mother's welfare,

but I have a pretty good idea

what it is you're concerned about.

- Don't you see, Carolyn,

you're prejudging me without the benefit of a proper trial.

I'm really a nice guy as I think time will prove.

But you've got to give me that time.

Now, with me around here, I--

Well, I think things will be very pleasant.

I'm only trying to fill the gap your father left.

I want you to have all the attention you deserve.

The fatherly kind of attention.

- Now you're making me sick.

- Is that so?

Well, let me tell you something, Carolyn.

This wedding will go on

in spite of you and your efforts to stop it.

So why don't you knock it off and give everyone a break!?

And a chance for a little happiness!?

- Did you you handle her?

- Well-- Rather well, I think.

I had some rather nice words with her.

Some harsh ones too, but, uh--

I think it went rather nicely.

- Did you talk her out of it?

- Well, I think I have the situation under control.

- How do you mean?

- Well, I talked some sense to her all right.

made her see a few points.

She's a very headstrong girl.

- Did you or didn't you talk her out of marrying him?!

- Now surely, Liz, you didn't expect me

to talk her out of the whole thing right away!

These things take time and a little working on.

- It sounds to me

as if you didn't have any effect on her at all!

She's still going out with him, isn't she?

- Well-- well, sure.

You can't expect her to break it off with him like that!

- I knew you wouldn't be able to do anything about it.

- I'm telling you, Liz, I'm handling the situation.

- What will you do next?

- Ah, well, now, next I think would be

a little chat with the lad, Buzz.

I'm sure I can handle him.

- I hope you can, I really do.

Because if you don't--

- I shouldn't make any threats if I were you, Liz.

If anyone can save you from a mess, it's me.

- Well, if you don't clear it up,

you'll be in as much trouble as I am.

♪♪

[jukebox playing]

- [laughing]

[laughing]

[music ends]

Oh, okay. Boy, this place is dead tonight.

Absolutely dead.

- Got the wrong generation hanging out here.

- [giggling]

There must be a better place than this.

A place where we can really swing.

- I know just the place you're talking about,

over in Logansport.

- Well, let's make it! - Come on.

- Oh, how does the powder on my nose look?

- Who looks at your nose?

[slow music playing]

- I do. Back in a minute.

- Ah, Buzz, there you are.

Enjoying the nightlife?

- Not too much.

- Where's Carolyn?

- You checking up on her?

- Oh, no, Buzz, not at all.

I withdraw the question.

No, I'm just here for a-- a little relaxation.

- Her nose needed some powder.

- No, not that nose.

Ah, she's a pretty kid.

You like her a lot, don't you?

- Would I be wasting my time like this if I didn't?

- Do you mind if I sit here?

Just till she comes back?

- If you feel it, sit it.

- Have you known her for a long time?

- On and off, a couple of years.

- Ever been out with her much?

- No. As a matter of fact,

she never went out with me before.

- Oh, well, why is that, I wonder?

- I guess she figured I wasn't her type.

She comes from a family that makes big noise.

And I come from a family that makes big money, ha!

- Now, doesn't it strike you as odd that, uh,

she suddenly started to go out with you?

- Nope.

I figured she always dug me a little.

- Oh, now Buzz.

What I'm going to say is a--

a little on the confidential side

but I think it's something you should know.

- Oh, yeah, what is it?

- Well, now, as you know, I'm marrying Carolyn's mother.

And Carolyn doesn't like it one little bit.

- That's right, she doesn't dig you at all.

- Yes, well, now, what she'd like to do

is prevent her mother from marrying.

And she figures if she can shake her up enough she'll win.

And in order to do that, she's using you.

- Could be.

She told me all about that stuff.

- Well, now, don't you--

Don't you mind being used like that?

- If that's what's happening, man,

I'm having it pretty good.

- Yes, well.

Oh, I hate to see a guy picked up and used like that.

I also hate to see her making things rough on her mother.

- You getting around to the message?

- Sure.

Don't take seriously all that talk about

getting married, you know.

That's just a bluff she's using against her mother.

And once she's made her point, she'll... drop you.

- So what do you want from me?

- Well, I think it would be perfectly all right for you

to go out with her a few more times and then...

...cut it off soon.

- You're asking me to give up something I like?

- Oh, I realize that, Buzz.

And I want you to know that it will be very much appreciated.

- Oh, yeah?

How much will it be appreciated?

- Well now, I'm sure we can negotiate that rather easily.

Well, let's see now, you've a--

That's a pretty nice motorcycle you have out there.

Now, I'm sure,

if you can manage to spend more time

with your other friends and forget about Carolyn,

you could very easily afford a new motorcycle.

- It means that much?

- That much. What do you say?

- I say no.

- Why not?

- I like the bike I got and the chick I got.

- Well, here he is again, my stepfather.

- Hello, Carolyn, I was just passing through.

- Hey, baby, guess what?

I can get a new bike.

- How?

- He's gonna buy it for me.

- What for?

- For not hanging out with you.

You're a <span tts:fontStyle="italic">bad</span>influence!

- Are you going to take it? - Are you kidding?

Swap you for a bike? Never!

- [chuckling]

[both laughing]

- Well, Jason,

I guess you're a little short on salesmanship tonight.

But then the only person you could ever sell

a bill of goods to was my mother.

What's the matter, Jason?

Is my mother having second thoughts?

- No, Carolyn, no second thoughts.

Her marriage will go through as planned.

- I hope so.

Marriage is a wonderful institution.

Isn't that right, Buzz?

- You know it, baby.

Come on, let's go to Logansport

before he offers me a sidecar too.

[both laughing]

- Good night, Jason, don't wait up for us.

Pleasant dreams.

But then I know your dreams are always pleasant.

They're about money.

[both laughing]

[music playing on jukebox]

♪♪

♪♪

[announcer] - "Dark Shadows" is a Dan Curtis Production.