09x31 - The Ole' Berate and Switch

[bunniefuu]

[panting]

- Yahoo! - We did it!

JESSIE 'They're in a rage, but we've got the cage.'

Come back.

Give Pikachu back now.

[panting]

- Huh? - Quickly, which way?

It's either left or right.

[HAPPY]

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH Huh?

Okay. Pikachu, use Thunderbolt.

[THUNDERBOLT MOVE]

[screaming]

JAMES/MEOWTH/JESSIE We're blasting off again.

[screaming]

We didn't even get to do jokes.

Leave it to a man to not remember directions.

Leave it to a woman to not keep her cage fastened.

[DISAPPOINTED]

Meowth was supposed to make sure it was locked tight.

Then how about giving me a key?

- But where's the key, James? - In your pocket.

[grunting]

Now, here's the deal.

If you weren't always getting sucked into having

feelings all the time

perhaps we wouldn't be a loser laughing stock.

How dare you?

See? The heart's racin', but the brain's in neutral.

Well, I'd rather have a heart than be a calculating cad

like Miss Sultan of Selfish.

[CONTENT]

Now, that we're talking brass tacks

even a Meowth who can talk can't hold a candle to a Persian.

Imagine how successful we'd be with a talking Persian

instead of this Loudred mouth.

What?

Aah, Brutal Banter even for you.

[CONTENT]

Good, I'm glad we're cuttin' through the crud

and talkin' the truth.

If the Boss hadn't made me work with you wackos

in the first place, I wouldn't.

JESSIE/JAMES Caustic quacking, even for you.

So, what do you say we call it quits?

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH Hmph.

Fine. Going solo will be the best thing.

Dumpin' you dweebs will be a dream come true.

Come on, Mime Jr.

- Good luck, lightweights. - Speak for yourself, sap.

[instrumental music]

♪ Pokémon ♪

♪ It's a battle win or lose ♪

♪ It's the friends you make ♪

♪ It's the road you choose ♪

♪ You got the right stuff ♪

♪ So make your mind up ♪

♪ Find the courage inside of you ♪

♪ If you're strong you'll survive ♪

♪ And you'll keep your dream alive ♪

♪ It's the Battle Frontier ♪

♪ Pokémon ♪

♪ Be the best you can be ♪

♪ And find your destiny ♪

♪ It's the master plan ♪

♪ The power's in your hand ♪

♪ Pokémon ♪♪

ASH "The Ole' Berate And Switch."

PIKACHU [HAPPY]

My Mulberry Ribbon sure sparkles.

The Grand Festival's coming soon.

I love that it's gonna be in a great place

like The Indigo Plateau.

Me too. Wow, I can't wait.

NARRATOR As our Heroes admire May's fifth ribbon

they're closing in on Brock's hometown of Pewter City

beyond which lies Ash's final Battle Frontier challenge

the Battle Pyramid.

Just one more Frontier win

and I'll be the Battle Frontier Champion.

[HAPPY]

Ash, I know you're fired up

but we're going to Brock's Gym first.

- Huh? - That's right. Awesome.

Brock, the Pewter City Gym's a Rock-type Gym, right?

Yeah.

Hey, kids. I mean, you confident young lads and lasses.

It's time to sign up for the one-day

Pokémon Battle Tournament.

- Huh? A one-day tournament? - Hey, kid.

- You'd be perfect for this. - Huh?

[thinking] Huh. It's that Twerp and his Pikachu.

- Perfect for what? - That.

The big Pokémon Battle in Sable City.

BUTCH The annual Pokémon event that brings out kids of all ages.

- Alright. - Ah.

This'll be the perfect warmup for the Battle Pyramid.

[chuckles]

CASSIDY 'Alright, kids, who else would like to sign up?'

I do, Nurse Joy. I do.

[thinking] My, we are excited, aren't we?

It's that annoying little Twerp again.

CASSIDY 'Now, please, write down your name and hometown on this sheet'

'along with the names of the Pokémon you'll be using.'

No prob.

CASSIDY 'And you can leave the rest of your Pokémon'

'right here with me.'

ASH/BROCK/MAX/MAY Huh?

CASSIDY 'Presenting the latest in Pokémon Healing technology.'

'Your Pokémon will be returned to you'

'fully rested and brimming with a fresh new energy.'

- Huh! - That sounds awesome.

CASSIDY 'We also have this ultra-modern Poké Ball Cleaning Machine.'

Even the filthiest of Poké ba*ls

come out sparkling clean, you see?

ASH/MAX/MAY/BROCK Huh.

Uh, can you take care of our Poké ba*ls

even if we're not competing today, Nurse Joy?

Of course, of course.

[EXCITED]

Get back here.

It's tournament, not restaurant.

After you're done with these perhaps a little fun?

- Aw. - Cool it.

Keep this up and your ear's gonna fall off.

My heart...it's not beating feverishly.

There is something different about this Nurse Joy.

- I guess. - Yeah.

[indistinct chatter]

CASSIDY 'Now, calm down, kids.'

'One at a time. One at a time.'

[instrumental music]

Welcome to the one-day Pokémon Tournament.

Here's our first battle.

'This matchup will be between Ash from Pallet Town'

'and Howie, who hails from our own Sable City.'

'And now for the Pokémon.'

'Ash has chosen his Corphish and Howie his Pinsir.'

Ready? And begin.

Pinsir, Vice Grip.

Dodge it, quick.

CORPHISH/PINSIR [EXERTION]/[VICE GRIP MOVE]

Now, Corphish, use Crabhammer.

[CRABHAMMER MOVE]

Pinsir, Guillotine.

[GUILLOTINE MOVE]

ANNOUNCER 'Did Pinsir's Guillotine give this bout an early finish?'

[indistinct cheering]

Wow. A one-day Pokémon Battle Tournament, eh?

Maybe this'll be my one-day Pokémon stealing spree.

[laughs]

Hmm, a one-day battle.

Sounds temporary.

[MISCHEVIOUS]

I need to get glasses.

Heh.

Pinsir, Seismic Toss.

PINSIR/CORPHISH [SEISMIC TOSS MOVE]/[PAINED]

Corphish, you okay?

[PAINED]

Pinsir, Guillotine.

[GUILLOTINE MOVE]

Corphish, use Harden.

CORPHISH/PINSIR [HARDEN MOVE]/[PAINED]

Corphish, Bubble Beam, go.

[BUBBLE BEAM MOVE]

[PAINED]

Now, Corphish, Crabhammer.

[CRABHAMMER MOVE]

[PAINED]

[STUNNED]

REFEREE 'Pinsir is unable to battle.'

'Corphish is the winner.'

'And the victory goes to Ash of Pallet Town.'

Alright.

[crowd cheering]

CASSIDY 'Hey, Patch. Earth to Patch?'

Would you take this box like a gentleman?

The name is "Butch" not Patch, moron.

Whatever, just take it. We've got work to do.

[instrumental music]

I'll say this, it's clean.

[CURIOUS]

JESSIE Huh?

Huh.

JESSIE/JAMES Hmph.

CASSIDY 'Well, if it isn't Team Nitwit.'

JESSIE/JAMES Huh?

[dramatic music]

- Cassidy. - Why are you here?

Because it's so clean?

[SHEEPISH]

Look, Blondie, tell us why you're here.

I just happen to be in the middle of a brilliant operation.

A phony one-day Pokémon Tournament

with the fiendish intention of stealing every Pokémon

I can get my gorgeous hands on.

By the way, I was shocked to see you didn't show up

for Mister Giovanni's excessively financed

surprise party the other day.

All the delectable food and drink. Maravilloso.

No one told us about any party.

No one tells us about anything.

Or there was that party for Professor Samba.

[phone ringing]

Huh? Yes?

It's Nanba, you idiot.

Of course, Professor Nanba.

- Not that one either. - Not a clue.

I see. I guess it was just for A-list people.

I'll have you know that the three of us are so exclusive

the Boss saves us for only important occasions.

You believe that junk? Well, now hear this.

You guys are minor league.

- I know you are but what am I? - A jerk.

[grunting]

CASSIDY/JESSIE Hmph!

No offense, James, but you look awful.

Is Jessie making you sick?

You don't think I know what disgust looks like?

- She does the same thing to me. - Huh?

I know. Why don't you join forces with Paunch and me?

Me surrounded by a couple of strange men

would be enough to scare the pants off of any enemy.

- Uh-uh. - Umm?

Done deal. I'm so glad you're on-board with our plan.

I am?

[LOST]

[instrumental music]

[grunts]

Corphish, Crabhammer, now.

[CRABHAMMER MOVE]

Marowak, dodge it.

MAROWAK/CORPHISH [EXERTION]

Marowak, Bonemerang.

[BONEMARANG MOVE]

Corphish, dodge.

[EXERTION]

[PAINED]

Ah, Corphish.

ANNOUNCER 'It looks like Marowak had'

'a bone to pick with Corphish.'

[DISAPPOINTED]

The worst part of it is not knowin'

it's a boomerang and it's gonna come back.

Poor Corphish.

What's wrong with that Cassidy?

That girl's known me forever and still calls me more names

than you can find in a baby book.

How embarrassing can it get?

JESSIE 'Well, well, if it isn't Clutch.'

Hey, I've already told you it's not Clutch. It's Butch.

Oh, sorry. We all make mistakes.

BUTCH Jessie?

What have we here?

'That must be the Poké Ball haul I heard about.'

How did you know?

A woman has a way of knowing everything.

Now, let me help you. I won't bite.

I don't think Cassidy will like this.

Please, the idea of giving a whit about what a stuck up

little snobbette likes or dislikes is insane.

- You're not that bad. - Huh?

No. Not me. I'm talking about Cassidy, you silly.

Okay, I'm taking over this operation right now.

- Huh? - No, no.

You don't have to thank me.

Getting rich is thanks enough.

Uh..

Now, Corphish. Use Vice Grip.

[EXERTION]/[VICE GRIP MOVE]

Marowak, dodge, then Bone Club.

[BONE CLUB MOVE]

Knock that Bone Club out of here, Corphish, go.

CORPHISH/MAROWAK [ATTACK]/[PAINED]

Yeah. Corphish.

Use Crabhammer, now.

[CRABHAMMER MOVE]

[PAINED]

[sigh]

Who would've thought it?

I miss those yahoos makin' fools out of themselves.

They're, oh, so good at that sort of thing.

Heh?

What do we got?

A biscuit? Oh, the memories.

The way we used to split our grub up

into three uneven pieces.

Be it a single biscuit.

Or a crust of bread.

Or an old baguette.

One and a half crackers

a potato chip, a baby orange

a hunk of cheese, even a stinking rice cake.

We always split it three ways, no matter what.

Ah. That was the Team Rocket way.

Munchlax, stop.

[grunts] I gotcha.

You can't keep runnin' off like that.

What's that?

JAMES Poké ba*ls of plenty.

See?

Can you imagine Jessie with this huge a heist?

Fronting a phony Pokémon Tournament

so that you could collect a cache of Poké ba*ls

and then take the booty and run?

And would Jessie have thought of this?

The day Jessie comes up with such genius

is the day she starts being kind to children and small Pokémon.

And that's why you must join us.

[THINKING] James with Butch and Cassidy?

CORPHISH/MAROWAK [CRABHAMMER MOVE]/[PAINED]

ANNOUNCER 'And Corphish's Crabhammer explodes on impact.'

'Marowak is unable to battle.'

'Corphish is the winner'

'and the victory goes to Ash of Pallet Town.'

Yeah.

[laughs]

- We did it, Brock. - 'Ash!'

MAY/BROCK/ASH Huh?

Uh, uh, uh, uh.

- Hey, Max, what's wrong? - It's all wrong.

Team Rocket set up this tournament as a trap.

ASH/MAY/BROCK/PIKACHU Huh?

Not only do they wanna steal everyone's Poké ba*ls

that Nurse Joy isn't even a real Nurse Joy.

- You're kidding. - Of course.

That's why Brock didn't feel anything for her.

That's weird how that happened.

[UNDERSTANDING]

Let's make sure the Poké ba*ls are alright.

- Hmm. - That way.

JAMES/CASSIDY Huh?

You give back all of those Poké ba*ls, or else..

What? Poké ba*ls? Where?

You can't fool us. In here.

ASH/BROCK/MAX/MAY Huh?

Who do you guys think you are?

Why don't you answer that?

Prepare for trouble, it's a brand new day.

We're making it double anyway.

[CONTENT]

Let's see if I can remember my lines.

An evil as old as the galaxy.

Sent here to fulfill our destiny.

To denounce the goodness of truth and love.

To extend our reach to the stars above.

Whenever there's a piece of pie in the universe..

- Of pie? - Aah.

I goofed it so what?

- Forget it. - It's Cassidy.

- That's not Butch. - I am too.

You need to get your eyes checked.

- Gee, maybe Butch is right. - Go, Houndour.

Corphish, use Bubble Beam, now.

[BUBBLE BEAM MOVE]

Corphish, Vice Grip.

Houndour, Flamethrower. Go.

HOUNDOUR/CORPHISH [FLAMETHROWER MOVE]/[PAINED]

[dramatic music]

Whoa, there's gotta be a million Poké ba*ls.

KIDS Huh?

This whole contest is a fake that Team Rocket put on

so they could steal your Poké ba*ls, so come get 'em back.

[clamoring]

Looks like you're fishing for a fight.

MEN Hmm.

KIDS Give 'hem back, right now.

Go, Rhydon.

[GROWLING]

Horn Attack, now.

[HORN ATTACK MOVE]

[indistinct clamoring]

You just don't understand.

These Poké ba*ls aren't like baseballs, you know.

Of course, they're not.

There are a lot of memories contained in all our Poké ba*ls.

BROCK Like the memory of when we saw our Pokémon for the firt time.

MAY All of our travels together.

ASH And how we fought side by side

in all of those Pokémon battles.

There's a ton a memories stored away in every Poké Ball.

- You want to just steal them? - What kind of people are you?

- Oh. - Huh?

Pikachu, use Thunderbolt.

[AFFIRMATIVE]/[THUNDERBOLT MOVE]

[screaming]

Supersonic.

Ledian, Comet Punch.

LEDIAN [COMET PUNCH MOVE]

Go, Hitmontop. Use Rapid Spin.

[RAPID SPIN MOVE]

Huh. A classic Cassidy mess.

So, up for a graceful exit?

- Yeah. - Huh?

ASH 'Hey!'

JESSIE/BUTCH Huh?

You're not taking those Poké ba*ls anywhere.

Swellow, I choose you.

[APPEARING]

[screaming]

Now, what are you doing here?

Prepare for trouble, we've shuffled the deck.

It's not my thing, but what the heck.

JESSIE An evil as old as the galaxy.

BUTCH I'm doing this all from memory.

To denounce the evils of truth and love.

To extend my arm with a big white glove.

- Jessie. - Uh, Butch.

Cut. Look.

Do it right or don't do it at all.

- It's Jessie. - And Paunch.

Stop. You Twerps love to t*rture me with that, don't you?

There's a definite change in the hair and voice.

Raticate, let's go.

[APPEARING]

Pikachu, use Thunderbolt.

[THUNDERBOLT MOVE]

[shrieking]

[screaming]

♪ Hmm hmm-hmm-hmm ♪♪

Yeah. Jackpot.

[laughs] Poké-City.

Say, when Jessie sees these, it'll be some photo op.

MIME JR. [HAPPY]

When James gets a load of this windfall

it's going to be humble pie for dinner.

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH Hey, get your paws off of my Poké Ball. Huh?

Those are mine, stop.

- Back off. They're mine. - Time out, time out.

MEOWTH 'Take a look at this.'

- Huh? - It's a biscuit.

Don't you guys remember whenever one of these things was all

we had to chow down on

we always split it up into three pieces?

JESSIE/JAMES Yeah.

It could have been a crust of bread

or one and a half biscuits, or a sandwich.

Even a piece of a candy bar.

We'd slice it into threes and we all got a little taste

like buddies do for each other.

When you're right, you're right.

Yeah. You know, I guess once a team, always a team.

MIME JR. [AGREEMENT]

Right, I know I get upset

and say all sort of things I don't mean.

Huh. Must be contagious.

[HAPPY]

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH One, two, three.

[chuckling]

Rhydon, Horn Attack.

[HORN ATTACK MOVE]

[screaming]

[CONTENT]

- 'Run.' - Huh?

Ash, what's goin' on?

ASH/BROCK/MAY/MAX Huh?

They're trying to steal everybody's Poké ba*ls.

'They can't do that.'

[panting]

- Give those Poké ba*ls back. - They're not yours.

We didn't get all of them, but these'll do.

[screaming]

[groaning]

Alright, who's the wise guy who dug this hole?

[panting]

ASH/MAX/MAY/BROCK Huh?

[screaming]

[groaning]

I think it's time to use Thunderbolt. Pikachu, go.

[AFFIRMATIVE]/[THUNDERBOLT MOVE]

[screaming]

CASSIDY/BUTCH We're blasting off just like those dopes.

CASSIDY Prepare for trouble, Mitc, 'cause here it comes.

BUTCH 'It's Butch.'

[instrumental music]

I may be wrong, but I swear I just heard

"Prepare for trouble."

I did too, so make it double.

An evil as old as the galaxy.

Sent here to fulfill our destiny.

Meowth, that's me.

To denounce the evils of truth and love.

To extend our reach to the stars above.

- Jessie. - And it's James.

Hey, Meowth's the name.

Whenever there's peace in the universe..

- Team Rocket.. - Will be there..

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH To make everything worse.

[AGREEMENT]

- Seems like old times. - Dig it.

JESSIE Now, who could've dug that hole?

JAMES Three geniuses.

MEOWTH Yeah, that's us.

- Team Rocket. - Here we go again, guys.

MEOWTH 'Play, magic fingers.'

We're celebrating.

And these will be our party favors.

Corphish, use Bubble Beam.

[BUBBLE BEAM MOVE]

JAMES/JESSIE/MEOWTH Whoa.

Hey, flying ain't so bad.

We're together.

Just like a chartered flight.

JAMES/JESSIE/MEOWTH We're blasting off as friends.

[indistinct chattering]

BOY A 'Whoa, I've got my Poké Ball back.'

BOY B 'Mine too.'

They're all happily lost in memories.

That's the best way to be lost.

Right, buddy?

[AGREEMENT]

All those Team Rocket guys

but us only having three to deal with? We're lucky.

NARRATOR Now that our heroes have safely returned all those Poké ba*ls

to their grateful owners, you can be sure the Pewter Gym

is front and center on their minds.

[instrumental music]

JESSIE/JAMES/MEOWTH One, two, three.

That ill*gal wrist move gave you the big piece.

Yeah, Jess, what a gyp.

Hey, that's just the way the cookie crumbles.

JAMES/MEOWTH Let's do it again.

Who'll stick it back together, you two handy-andies?

MEOWTH Look, stinker, give it back.

-'Give me some glue.' - Give me a break.

[instrumental music]

♪ Yo ♪ ♪ Pokémon Masters ♪

♪ Your heart beats faster training for the top ♪

♪ 'Cause you know you can't stop ♪

♪ Your training kicks ♪ ♪ Now ♪

♪ Pokémon Pow ♪ ♪ Wow ♪

♪ The power of a master all before you will ♪

♪ But don't let it get to your head young Trainer ♪

♪ The road is long and filled with danger ♪

♪ Everyone says they deserve to be number one ♪

♪ But who can top you ♪ ♪ The answer is none ♪

♪ Because they've never seen an expert like ♪

♪ One who knows the difference between Mewtwo ♪

♪ Or someone who can tell you the type ♪

♪ Or someone who can tell you which Pokémon's ♪

♪ First you kick it in Kanto ♪

♪ Then you head to Johto ♪♪