Sexual Healing (1993)

[bunniefuu]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Listen, Marlin,
there's something

I want to talk to you about.

Sure.

What is it?

I think we should start
to explore things.

Explore?

Yeah, you know, like take
this to the next step.

You mean-- David, you
are amazing person,

and I really want
you in my life.

Yeah?

But I don't--

I'm not attracted
to you in that way.

What do you mean?

You're like a brother
to me, a best friend.

I would never want
to screw that up.

I got to go.

[MUSIC - MARVIN GAYE, "SEXUAL
HEALING"]

Oh, baby, let's
get down tonight.

Oh, baby.

I'm hot just like an oven.

I need some lovin'.

Baby, I can't hold
it much longer.

It's getting stronger
and stronger.

When I get that feeling,
I want sexual healing.

Sexual healing.

Oh, baby.

Makes me feel so fine.

Helps me relieve my mind.

Sexual healing, baby.

It's good for me.

Sexual healing, it's
something that's good for me.

Whenever blue
teardrops are fallin'

and my emotional
stability is leaving me,

there is something I can do.

I can get on the telephone
and call you up, baby.

Please.

Please open up.

Some painters are coming by
today to look at the playroom.

I'm reading this book that
blue fosters creativity.

That's fine.

But it said that red was
calming and tranquil,

good for the digestion.

That's fine.

Listen, why don't we just
put up a big picture of you.

Then we don't have
to paint at all, OK?

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

David?

I just got home.

I spent the night at Tim's.

I just got your message.

David, come on.

I know you're in there.

I did exactly what
you said, Suzanne,

and I got the same old sh*t.

Only this time I wandered around
like a g*dd*mn zombie, ended up

at a strip joint.

Was it a good show?

I didn't go in,
for Christ's sake.

I don't know, David.

You're a great guy and
you're great looking,

but somehow you just keep
repeating this pattern.

I'm repeating it?

This is my fault?

No, it's not your fault, but
it's like some part of you

must have shut
down or something.

Do we have to analyze this,
because if we do, then

I need another pint.

OK, you're right.

Sorry.

Maybe you should
just crash all day.

And then come dancing
with us later, OK?

I don't dance.

You know I don't dance.

Oh.

Well, maybe you
should try, you know?

You know what I should try?

I should try Bambi.

OK, good idea.

Try Bambi.

She's only $2 a minute.

Why bother with a
relationship at all?

OK, here's how it works.

Hundreds of women call this
line and listen to messages

from all you hot men.

Then they dial your number
for an erotic encounter.

At the tone, you'll have 20
seconds to leave a message.

Then you can review it
and rerecord if necessary.

Good luck.

Hi, my name is Jim, and
I'm an English teacher.

And I've never done this
before, but well, it's sort of--

I'm lying here on my bed.

I'm wearing nothing at all.

I'm thinking about you
and it's making me hot.

I've got seven inches of--

[LAUGHS]

I treat my lover like a flower.

I approach her softly,
stroke her tenderly.

Are there really any women
out there who are into this?

It's kind of weird, huh?

Scary.

We'll just see what happens.

Jim.

312-575-4845.

Leaving the San Fernando
Valley, as we just [INAUDIBLE]

down here by way of
the Hollywood Freeway.

Southbound 170 portion
of the Hollywood Freeway

still flooded from Magnolia
across the Ventura Freeway--

[PHONE RINGING]

This is 575-4845.

Leave a message.

Hi, I was calling for Jim.

Hi, this is Jim.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry I hung up.

No, no, it's OK.

It's OK.

What's your name?

Renee.

Renee, that's pretty.

I don't know if I
can actually do this.

You've never done this before?

No.

Oh my god, no.

Well, guess what?

I haven't, either.

Really?

Oh, I like that.

I feel better already.

Where are you
calling from, Renee?

Santa Ana.

How about you?

Venice.

Venice?

You mean like where the
roller skaters are and stuff?

Yeah, yeah.

It's just a couple
of blocks from here.

I used to skate all the time.

I loved it.

My husband stopped taking me.

You're married?

Oh my god, I shouldn't
have told you that.

I'm sorry.

Do you want me to just hang up?

No, no, no, no, no.

It's OK.

I mean, I just hadn't
really thought of--

I mean, this isn't the same as--

is it?

I don't know.

I don't think so.

I'd be too scared to do that.

I'm so nervous now, I don't
even know what I'm saying.

I know.

I know.

It's like we're people, right?

Just talking and how
we get together stuff.

I don't know.

Wait a minute, I got an idea.

Why don't we just hang up
and you'll call me back.

OK?

You call coming right back
and we'll just start right out

in the other way.

You're perfect.

Really, you're being so sweet.

You have to call me back.

You have to swear.

I swear.

[GIGGLES]

OK.

When you call back,
ask for David.

My real name's David.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?

Grandma, hi.

Look, I can't really
talk right now.

No, no, no.

Nothing's wrong, I'm just
really late for school.

Yeah, can I call
you back tonight?

After Jeopardy, OK.

All right, bye bye.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?

Hi, it's Renee.

You have a very
sexy voice, Renee.

What do you look like?

I'm 5'7", blonde
hair, and hazel eyes.

That's beautiful.

What about your body?

It's normal.

I mean, it's nice, I guess.

Right.

I'm 6'1".

I got brown eyes, brown
hair, and right now

I'm lying on my couch
and I'm totally naked.

I am, too.

Now, I want you to imagine
that you're on vacation.

It's a hot, humid night.

And your husband, he's gone
down to the bar for a drink.

Just as you're about to
drift off to sleep, I appear.

I kneel down beside
you on the bed.

You can feel my breath on your
neck, my lips on your lips

as we kiss, the back of my
hand as it slowly travels down

the length of your body.

Gently, I spread
your legs wide open.

I want you so badly.

I lick my way up the inside
of your thigh and circle

you, part you, taste you.

You clamp your
legs around my head

and just pull me in tighter.

You reach down with your
hand and you stroke me.

As I lick, you stroke.

Slowly at first, but
then faster and harder.

Then I pull away and
I glide up your body.

I stare into your
eyes and enter you.

This time we're inside each
other melting to the rhythm.

In and out.

In and out.

In and out.

Oh.

[SEXUAL NOISES]

I'm glad you don't
have call waiting.

[LAUGHS]

What's the most beautiful
place you've ever seen?

Yosemite.

I was nine.

The best meal you've ever eaten?

Kraft macaroni and cheese,
tater tots, and orange soda.

Oh.

No, no, no, no, no.

You don't understand.

Whenever I'm
depressed, it's like--

it's like mom or something.

No, I get it.

Mine is fishsticks
or Haagen-Dazs.

Oh, god.

Best sex?

Pass.

No passes.

No, pass.

Do you remember the
other day when I passed?

It was because--

I don't know how I
can say this- I don't

know if I've ever had good sex.

You're 32 years old.

I've never been with
anyone besides Frank.

You want to know the
best sex I ever had?

OK.

With you.

Oh come off it.

No, I'm serious.

Well, that's ridiculous.

You should just
get out there more.

Just be the guy who talks to me.

What if it's about you?

How could it be?

You don't even know
what I look like.

Well, maybe we should
exchange pictures.

Are you still there?

Barely.

Have you thought any
more about the pictures?

I'm scared, David.

I want to, but I'm scared.

Don't you think I'm scared?

I mean, your husband could
hunt me down and k*ll me.

But that's why my
plan is so safe.

It's not that.

It's just starting
to feel so real.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Can you talk?

David, are you OK?

No, I'm not.

I just got back--

I shouldn't be telling you this.

Telling me what?

Hey, look, you know how
you were saying that this

was starting to feel so real.

Well, real is supposed
to be what I want, right?

But there's something--
there's something inside.

I just can't--

I ended up at this
sleazy club with dancers.

You mean like strippers?

Yeah.

And one of them, I
guess she was a--

she said for 100 bucks, she'd--

oh my God, what was I doing?

Did you have some kind
of sex, is that it?

It wasn't, you
know, sex exactly.

What difference does it make?

David, I'm not sure, but I
think I know how you feel.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'm sure this happens
to you all the time.

No, no, no, no.

That's not what I'm saying.

I mean, I don't know, but I
think you had a freak out,

David, and I think
it makes sense.

It's not bad or anything.

No?

No.

What should we do?

I have an idea.

Hello?

Do you have it?

I have it.

When you're ready.

I'm ready.

[INAUDIBLE] I'm ready.

1, 2.

You have very sexy
handwriting, by the way.

And 3.

You're beautiful.

No, I think you're beautiful.

No, you are.

No, really, you are.

[LAUGHS]

[MUSIC - LEONARD COHEN, "WHO BY
FIRE"]

And who by fire, blue by
water, who in the sunshine,

who in the nighttime.

Who by high ordeal,
who by common trial.

Who in your merry,
merry month of May.

Who by very slow decay.

And who shall I say is calling?

And who in her lonely
slip, who by barbiturate.

Who in these realms of love,
who by something blunt.

Who by avalanche, who by powder.

Who for his greed,
who for his hunger.

And who shall I say is calling?

Who by brave assent,
who by accident.

Who in solitude,
who in this mirror.

Who by his lady's command,
who by his own hand.

Who in mortal
chains, who in power.

And who shall I say is calling?

You're not having lunch with me?

I can't, Holly, I'm sorry.

I have to run this errand.

So I'll run it with you.

Oh, no, no, no.

That's all right.

That's all right.

We'll do it tomorrow.

Just a minute.

I know what's going on here.

There is no Aaron.

You're having an affair.

No, I'm not.

Yes, you are.

It's written all over your face.

Holly.

Holly, I'm not having an affair.

Wait, wait, wait.

What exactly do you
consider an affair?

An affair, my darling, is when
a man and a woman get together,

at least one of them married,
and exchanged sexual favors.

Right.

I'm not having an affair.

David, you ruined me.

It's all I think about on
the freeway and at work.

You wouldn't believe the
stuff that pops into my mind.

Well, good, you're
making up for lost time.

It's scary, though.

I mean, look at us.

Do you think what
we do is normal?

Well, it's safe,
that's for sure.

These phone lines are booming.

Yeah, but do other people
have a whole relationship?

Whole relationship?

I like the way that sounds.

I'm sorry.

I slept through the alarm.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Why?

I don't know.

You're acting kind
of different lately.

Different?

What do you mean?

I've never seen you
quite so moony before.

David, are you there?

Pick up.

I'm here.

What's wrong?

I think Frank
suspects something.

Why?

What happened?

It doesn't even matter.

I don't even care.

And then I do care, and I'm
just mad that he doesn't.

How do you know he doesn't?

Because he's turned
into a zombie.

It's like he can't
even deal with me.

It's like he has no
idea what I need.

Do you tell him in a
way that he can hear?

What does that mean?

Real calm, real direct,
asking for specific things.

He doesn't listen.

He's not like you.

All he would do is look at
me like I was out of my mind.

All right, all right,
I was just asking.

Directory assistance.

This is Jessica.

The number you have reached.

3-9.

It's for you.

Jamie.

I got one pepperoni
and one mushroom.

Hi, you've reached--

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

Come in and file a report.

No, I won't.

Excuse me, I didn't
have the affair.

I'm calling with the
results of your HIV test.

There's nobody
here by that name.

[PHONE RINGING]

Let's take another call.

Remember when we were talking
about my pattern with women

and how I should get out more?

Well, I'm finally ready.

Really?

Good.

Great.

Which is why I think the
two of us should meet.

David, that's not really--

Why not?

Well, because, David, you
know how I feel about you,

but I have a life.

You know, I have a
husband, a daughter.

A husband who barely speaks
to you, let alone loves you.

OK, wait a minute, OK?

He does love me.

And do you love him?

Yes.

No.

Yes.

Yes, I do.

I mean, I love--

I love who he was before.

That's enough for you?

You're willing to
settle for that?

I don't know.

I don't understand why
you're pushing this now.

Let's just enjoy this,
can't we, for a while?

What's a while?

Give me some time, OK, and
I promise I'll do, you know,

what I've been
chicken to do so far.

The talking?

Uh-huh.

And I'll get drunk or
something, whatever it takes,

and I'll do the
whole fantasy myself.

You won't have to
say a single thing.

It's not about that.

You know, it's beyond that.

I know, but I want to do
it, for you and for me, OK?

[MUSIC PLAYING]

[VOCALIZING]

Hello?

Hi, it's me.

Well, you ready to go?

I'm as ready as I'll ever be.

You have to promise
you won't laugh,

and that if I make a
mistake, I can start over.

Uh-huh.

And if you don't like
it, you have to lie

and say it was the most
amazing thing you've ever

had in your life.

OK, calm down.

OK, OK.

I'm calm.

OK, here it goes.

It's the senior prom at
the school where you teach.

Uh-huh.

All the kids are in
like tuxedos and gowns.

You're the chaperone,
surrounded by adoring girls.

Underneath your
table is a trap door,

and I climb out of
it, totally naked.

No one can see me because
of the long tablecloth.

Slowly, carefully, I slither
through this maze of pumps.

I spread your legs,
unzip your pants.

It's all been arranged.

You've been expecting me.

You know, you have to
keep up a conversation,

keep a straight face.

As I take you in my
hands, I open my mouth,

and plunge my wet lips--

oh my god, Mike's home.

Oh my god, what do I do?

Renee, don't panic.

Listen to me.

Don't hang up.

Go in the bathroom
and lock the door.

Renee, you home?

Ren?

What's going on?

Where are you?

I'm in here.

How come you're home so early?

He sent us home early.

Why is the door locked?

I don't feel good.

I just threw up.

Flush the toilet.

Why are you drinking?

You don't drink.

I thought it would
make me feel better.

Is someone else here?

No.

Come out of there.

I want to talk to you.

I've got to go.

I'll call you back.

No, Renee, don't
hang up on me now.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

David, are you conscious?

Who's that?

Not now, Suzanne.

No one, just my neighbor.

I just need my book.

I left it in here.

Your neighbor?

I told you about her.

She lives downstairs.

Suzanne, this is
not a good time.

[INAUDIBLE] late for work.

If she's just a neighbor, then
why did she barge right in?

All tangled up in the sheets.

What is going on?

You begged me to
stay on the phone

and then some woman
hops into your bed?

What is the big deal?

Who are you talking to?

Goodbye, Suzanne.

There, she's gone.

Fabulous.

I don't know what you're
so freaked out about.

I mean, you're the one with
the husband in the next room.

I told you about him.

Well, there is nothing to
tell, for Christ's sake.

Renee, please,
this is ridiculous.

Hey, I love you.

Do you love me, too?

David.

We have to meet.

I know where you work.

I peeled off the sticker.

I have to go.

Goodbye.

I'm lonely, Frank.

I buy lingerie to
feel beautiful.

I make up stories
to feel wanted.

Are you sleeping with someone?

No, not even my husband.

Are you sure you're not
sleeping with someone?

The way things have
gotten around here,

would it surprise you if I were?

What about the family?

Well, what about it?

[BEEP]

David, are you there?

It's second period already.

Why haven't you called in?

Do you still want
this job or what?

[MUSIC PLAYING]

What floor?

You got it.

Thanks.

What?

We're almost there.

We're almost there.

I, uh-- they said I
was coming in early.

I know it's your lunch hour.

So I was wondering if you
want to go on a picnic?

A picnic?

If you want to.

I mean, it's just an idea.

No, no.

You got to start somewhere.

[CLEARING THROAT]

I'll go.

I'd like to go.

But there are things I
need from you, Frank.

Real things, specific things.

OK.

Let's talk.

Let's talk about them.

Yeah?

Yeah.

[CLEARING THROAT]

I'll be right back.

OK.

[MUSIC - CHAKA KHAN, "SWEET
THING"]

I will love you anyway,
even if you cannot stay.

I think you are the one for me.

Here is where you ought to be.

I just want to satisfy you,
though you're not mine.

I can't deny you.

Don't you hear me talking, baby?

Love me now or I'll go crazy.

Oh, sweet thing.

Don' you know you're
my everything?

Oh, sweet thing.

Don't you know
you're my everything?

I wish you were my lover,
but you act so undercover.

To love you child my whole
life long, be it right

or be it wrong.

I'm only what you
make of me, baby.

Don't walk away.

Don't be so shady.

Don't want your mind.

Don't want your money.

These words I say, they
may sound funny, but.

Oh, sweet thing.

Don't you know
you're my everything?

Oh, sweet thing.

Don't you know
you're my everything?

Yes, you are.

Yes, you are.

[VOCALIZING]

You are my heat.

You are my fire.

You are my weak
with strong desire.

To love you child my whole
life long, be it right

or be it wrong.

I just want to satisfy you,
though you're not mine.

I can't deny you.

Don't you hear me talking, baby?

Love me now or I'll go crazy.

[VOCALIZING]

You're the heat.

You are the fire.

You're not mine.

I can't deny you.

Don't you hear me talking, baby?

Love me now or I'll go crazy.

You're the heat.

You are the fire.

You're not mine.

I can't deny you.

Don't you hear me talking, baby?

Love me now or I'll go crazy.

You're the heat.

You're the fire.

You're not mine.

I can't deny you.

Don't you hear me talking, baby?

Love me now or I'll go crazy.

You're the heat.

You are the fire.

[MUSIC - MARVIN GAYE, "SEXUAL
HEALING"]

Oh, baby now let's
get down tonight.

Oh, baby.

I'm hot just like an oven.

I need some lovin'.

And baby, I can't
hold it much longer.

It's getting stronger
and stronger.

When I get that feeling,
I want sexual healing.

Sexual healing, oh, baby.

Makes me feel so fine.

Helps to relieve my mind.

Sexual healing,
baby, is good for me.

Sexual healing is something
that's good for me.

Whenever blue teardrops are
fallin', and my emotional

stability is leaving me.

There is something I can do.

I can get on the telephone
and call you up, baby.

And honey, I know you'll
be there to relieve me.

The love you give
to me will free me.

If you don't know the
thing you're dealing,

oh, I can tell you, darling,
that it's sexual healing.

Let's make love tonight.

Wake up, wake up, wake up.

On certain streets in
Southern California,

it's not unusual to see a
van like this with people

like this working out of it--

electricians wiring,
gaffers gaffing,

stars going over their
lines, or maybe just talking

to their agents.

David, you know how I feel
about you, but I have a life.

On this particular set,
it's all happening,

but with a difference.

Here, everyone's putting in
their time, and overtime,

for free.

We're giving them professional
shots for nothing.

I don't know.

I think they ought to
double my pay, actually.

The film is Sexual Healing,
an independent production

that would otherwise
be called low budget.

In this case, it's no budget.

The movie is being shot as a
benefit for A*DS charities,

and is the brainchild of
writer/director Howard Cushnir.

Whoever we started
talking to, whether it

was a lab or a caterer or an
equipment house or a crew,

and cast as well, we'd say,
we're making a short film.

And they'd say, oh, big deal.

Dime a dozen.

And then we'd say, it's a
benefit for A*DS charities.

And they'd say, really?

How can we help?

Among those who
did help is a core

of acting talent that one could
rightfully call high priced.

Helen Hunt from Mr.
Saturday Night and TV's

Mad About You, Anthony Edwards
from Top g*n and Northern

Exposure, and Seinfeld's
neurotic sidekick,

Jason Alexander.

I got a phone call from Howard.

Jason, how would you
like to do this movie?

Small role.

No money.

And of course, I jumped on it.

I mean, those are
the conditions I

like to work under
whenever I possibly can.

Sexual Healing is
the story of David,

a romantically
frustrated bachelor,

and Renee, a woman trapped
in a loveless marriage, who

attempt to make a connection
through the convenient

and increasingly popular
avenue of phone sex.

Right now I'm lying on
my couch, totally naked.

I am, too.

This is a safe thing because
it's only on the phone.

In fact, there's a
scene in the movie where

she asks her friend, what
exactly is an affair?

An affair, my darling, is when
a man and a woman get together,

at least one of them married,
and exchange sexual favors.

Right.

I'm not having an affair.

Through the magic
of this phone line,

she can have an adventure,
and then the adventure

becomes sexual, and
then it becomes loving.

That's, I think, the
journey that it takes.

Already a multimillion
dollar industry in America,

phone sex, according
to the filmmakers,

appeals to our desires for
both intimacy and isolation.

It also serves as an appropriate
backdrop for a film dedicated

to combating A*DS.

The single most difficult
and prevalent aspect

of sexuality in the
age of A*DS is fear.

People have equated fear
with sex, sex with death.

And something that
for a lot of people

was fun and interesting and
thrilling, and all of that,

became dangerous and
dark and just fraught

with all kinds of problems.

So phone sex, if nothing else,
is the safest sex imaginable.

You're beautiful.

No, I think you're beautiful.

No, you are.

No, really, you are.

[LAUGHS]

I don't think that
phone sex will

be the wave of the future
for our relationships

or intimacy with people.

I think it happens
to be the thing

of the late '80s, early '90s,
like the pet rock of intimacy.

It's a clever trick
that someone thought up

to play off of everybody's
fear in relation

to getting to know someone or
having a sexual relationship

with someone.

If the '90s are
producing relationships

as unnaturally
distant as this one,

they are also producing
some benefits.

As horrible as the
A*DS epidemic is,

it's done a couple of things
that, in certain people's

minds, are very positive.

It's done wonders for
monogamous relationships.

It's really made people
reassess their sexual values,

their sexual morals,
their sexual activity.

And there's a lot more
relationships happening,

as opposed to couplings.

And in a town notorious
for its inflated salaries

and inflated egos,
the crisis has also

brought out some very
positive impulses.

I'm very impressed with
this group of people.

My face will be out
there, so in that sense,

professionally, I
get that out of it.

But these people are
donating their time

because they feel like
it's a good thing to do,

and I find that
pretty remarkable.

Sexual Healing, premiering July
18th, exclusively on Showtime.

Back in the early '90s, I
had written and rewritten

a number of scripts, and I
was at that point in my career

where I wanted to become
a director as well.

And I also knew that
there was no reason

anyone should believe
that I could do that,

and so I set out to do what
many people in that position do,

which is make a short film.

And I wanted to choose a subject
matter that really lent itself

to that length, and
that also created

a challenge for me to overcome.

Now, the world of phone sex was
really interesting back then.

There wasn't computers
and Skype and chat rooms

and cyber this and that.

Really, it was all about
individuals being able to hook

up with other individuals,
not professionals.

And it created a tremendous
amount of intimacy,

on the one hand, because
your phone receivers make

you brain to brain,
but at the same time,

there's complete
distance and anonymity.

So that's what led me
to the subject matter

and the treatment
of Sexual Healing.

Also, what I wanted to do
was create a real closeness,

and I wanted the
audience to really care

about the relationship
between these two characters

who never meet in person until
the very end of the film.

And my hope was that producers
and studios would say,

wait a minute.

This guy got us to care about
two people who were never

even in the same
room, and so maybe we

should give him a
shot with people who

actually are in the same room.

And one interesting
note about that

is that when we shot the film,
we use this special device so

that we couldn't use
actual phone lines,

but we had the characters on
phones, never in the same room.

So as much as
possible, we simulated

the world of phone sex as
it existed at that time.

When you make a short
film, basically everyone

has to work for free, and
you're pulling in every favor

that you can and
you're asking people

to extend themselves
on their own time,

and I was a little
uncomfortable with that.

I wasn't such a good asker.

And at the same
time, I had a career

previously as an
activist for human rights

and the environment.

And so I came up with
the idea of creating

the film as a fundraiser for
the Minority A*DS Project.

And this was a
little bit strange.

It had never been done before.

And there was a real good
reason why it hadn't been done,

and that is that there
was no market, really,

for short films.

You could go on the
festival circuit, of course,

but you don't make
any money doing that.

So some people wondered, was it
a trick, a gimmick, et cetera?

But I had this feeling
that if we pulled it off,

somehow there would
be a market for it

and we would be able to raise
money for the Minority A*DS

Project.

And so that's how I set it up,
and we were off and running.

In the early stages
of preproduction,

I had two actors who were
working with me in the two

lead roles.

Both of them were
friends of mine.

Not really famous, but
really high quality actors.

And one of them,
the male lead, I

ended up having a big
creative disagreement with.

And he quit, or I
fired him, or both.

I'm not sure.

And the other one
decided to stay on,

but we had to find
a new male lead.

And I racked my
brain trying to think

of who might be good for it.

And I remembered that,
from my activist days,

I had a good connection
with Anthony Edwards.

So I asked him, and lo and
behold, he read the script.

He liked it.

He said he would do it.

So that was great.

I was really excited
at that point.

And then right before
we started sh**ting,

my friend, the actress,
got chicken pox

and had to back out
of the whole thing.

So on the one hand,
this was an emergency.

We were all set to go.

What were we going to do?

But it turned out to
be an opportunity,

as well, because I remembered
that one of Anthony Edward's

best friends, who he'd
known for years and years,

was Helen Hunt.

And I asked him,
very tentatively,

if he would ask her.

He did.

She loved the role and
she agreed to do it.

She was in between assignments
and had just the right amount

of time.

The real motivation,
to be honest,

though, was that she
and Tony had never

worked together up
until that time,

and they saw it as their
first chance to do so.

So we also had
Jason Alexander, who

agreed just because
he wanted to help out.

So my little film
went from being one

that probably wouldn't
have been noticed

to having big stars
in it, and that

made a lot of
things a lot easier

as we were getting
ready to sh**t.

The first challenge I had in
working skillfully with actors

on a set was when Helen
came to me about one

of the scenes that had her doing
something pretty outlandish.

She was going to
climb up on a table

and she was going
to kind of make

a fool of herself,
in what I thought

was right for the character.

But she didn't.

And she came to me right before
we were all set up to sh**t.

And she said, I've been trying
this 100 different ways,

and I have a feeling that
I'm going to commit myself

on camera to something that
I'm going to really regret,

and I don't want to do it.

So I had no idea what to do.

Time was ticking.

The clock and the
money were rolling.

And luckily, Jason
Alexander stepped in

and he said, you know,
when in doubt, shtick.

And that's the scene
you'll see where there's

a spit take, essentially.

And it worked.

It got us through that
one point in the film.

It's still the one
I'm least proud of,

because we had to
think of it on the spot

and it's not exactly true to
the story or the character,

but it's what we
can do at the time.

One other time during the course
of the filming Helen and I

had something we
had to work through,

and this time I felt like it was
important to do it a little bit

indirectly.

So it's the scene
when she's having

phone sex with Tony's character,
and her husband comes home.

And she's really
freaked out about this,

but she's even more freaked
out when Tony says to her,

I know where you live.

I peeled off the sticker.

And he's referring to
the return address that

was on the envelope
that she sent him

that she had covered up with
a sticker from her workplace.

And I wanted Helen to have
a really big response,

because it seemed like he was
almost threatening that he was

going to break the
agreement they had

to keep their lives separate,
which would have been really,

really scary for
her at that time,

especially because
she's already filled

with adrenaline because
her husband is just

about to barge in on her.

So I just wasn't
getting the intensity

that I hoped for in her
response when he said that.

And I didn't know what to do,
and I talked to Tony about it

at lunch.

And he said, well, I have
an idea that might help you,

but you're going
to be on your own.

I don't know how Helen
is going to react.

And so what we worked out is
that without telling Helen,

that when we shot the
scene in close-up,

instead of saying the
lines as scripted,

Tony made them much more
urgent and menacing.

He said something like,
I know where you live.

I'm going to come there.

And in the moment, Helen,
great actress that she is,

just completely jumped and
gave the perfect reaction.

And then the only
thing left was to see

was she going to be
upset with me afterwards

because of that manipulation?

So we said cut and
there was a pause,

and I'm kind of sweating it out.

She just turned, cool
as a cucumber to Tony

and said, great scene, Tony.

And never spoke of
it again, and I never

checked up about it with her.

So to this day, I don't know
whether she knew what we did

or if she was just so in it,
it didn't even occur to her

that anything was different.

One of the final things we did
on the film was the soundstage,

the post-production, and the
key pieces where the music--

there's a lot of
music in this film.

It was really important to me.

And the song that
had to be in there,

as far as I was concerned,
was "Sexual Healing,"

the Marvin Gaye song, title
of our film, of course.

And we had tried really hard
to get the rights to the song

and we hadn't heard back.

It wasn't a no, we just
didn't hear anything.

And now there was
no time left, and I

knew someone who
knew someone who

knew someone who got in
touch with EMI and said,

what's going on?

And what we found out was is
that the estate of Marvin Gaye

had given us the rights to
the song weeks and weeks ago,

but there was a co-writer
who they couldn't find,

and therefore they
couldn't get his approval.

So they said, the only
way you can use the song

is if you write a letter,
little guy that you are,

indemnifying multibillion
dollar conglomerate EMI

against any possible future
claims from this co-writer.

So I talked to my
lawyer, while I

was right there on
the sound stage,

and my lawyer said, don't do it.

Don't do it.

And I thought, whoever this
guy is, if he ever turns up,

he's got to know
it's a benefit film.

It's helping people, and he's
not going to create a problem.

So I decided to go for it, and
20 years later, I have never

heard anything from he or
his people, and if I ever do,

I'm still hopeful and confident
that everything will be fine.

But that was probably
the biggest risk

that I had to take as
a young filmmaker, just

to protect the quality of what
it was I was trying to create.

In order to do the film
with a very small budget,

we decided half the money
would go towards production

and half the money would
go towards post-production.

But also, as somebody who was
the writer, producer, director,

and financer for the film,
at some point I had to let

go of some of the control.

So on the first day of sh**ting,
I gave my checkbook over to one

of the line producers,
and he was in charge.

And after the second or
third day of sh**ting,

we sat down to see
how things were going.

And at that point
I found out that he

had spent the entire budget, not
just the budget for production,

but production and
post-production as well.

So I was a wreck.

I didn't know what to do.

And I was completely fried
from just the directing

responsibilities and couldn't
get to sleep that night,

and finally decided, OK,
here's what we'll do.

We'll finish the
sh**t and then we'll

see if we can get donations
of editing bays and everything

else we needed to create
a rough cut of the film

that then we could market.

So that's what we
ended up having to do.

We got to a good cut
of the film and used

temporary sound, nothing
that we paid for, et cetera,

and took it to the one place
that was on the top of my list

that I thought would want
it, and that was Showtime.

And Showtime took one
look at the film, who

was in it, the subject matter,
and they said, yes, absolutely.

We'll do it.

So I was really thrilled
that the whole idea

was coming together,
not just as a film,

but as a benefit as well.

And what Showtime
and I worked out

was that as a part of
their deal with me,

which was just going to
recoup all of my costs--

so I wasn't making any
money in the process--

but they would give
a check for $25,000

directly to the
Minority A*DS Project.

So to this day, really proud
that that got pulled off.

We ended up giving more to
the Minority A*DS Project

later as more money
came into the film,

came to me through further
distribution of the film,

and that was the highlight.

The low light, so
to speak, regarding

what happened to the
film, this was right

before it came out on Showtime.

Now, it did great on Showtime.

Got good ratings.

It was nominated
for Cable Ace Award.

It won first prize at the
Houston Film Festival.

So I'm riding high.

And in the process
of riding high,

I contacted somebody
who I used to know

who writes for the LA Times.

And I said, would you be
interested in doing a feature,

not just on me as
a young filmmaker,

but on this benefit process
that we created to do the film?

Maybe because we
used to be friends,

he had to be extra
skeptical in his writing.

So he asked me this question.

He said, how do you
respond to the criticism

that making a short film
as a benefit for charity

is just a big publicity
stunt for your own interest?

And I thought about that, and
I said kind of off the cuff,

well, if making a film that
otherwise would have just

been for me turned out also
to raise money for people

who really need it, then that is
the greatest publicity stunt I

ever could have thought of.

I was a little bit naive to the
way newspaper editing works.

And the low light was
just around the time

that the film was premiering,
the article came out,

and they cut my quote so
that it said something

like, I figured out the
greatest publicity stunt ever.

And it sounded like I
was self-aggrandizing and

opportunistic and it
really was all about me.

So I was mortified,
but I thought

the article came out on a
Saturday, it would go away

and nobody would see it.

Unfortunately, the
people who saw it

were the executives at
the Screen Actors Guild.

Why was this a problem?

Well, that same line producer
who spent all the money

by the third day
of production was

supposed to get
a waiver from SAG

so that all these top-notch
actors could do the film

without getting in trouble.

And I asked him about the waiver
before we started sh**ting,

and he said, it's
all taken care of.

Well, it turns out it
was never taken care of.

And at this point, especially
because the article

caused them to distrust
me, SAG basically said,

either you pay $40,000 for the
salaries of all these actors,

even though they agreed
to work for free,

or the film is non-union.

My first thought
was, OK, non-union.

Sorry, we made a big
mistake, but I didn't do it

and I can't fix
it because I don't

have any money to give anybody.

But then I found out that
if the film was non-union,

then the actors would
all be in violation

of rule one of the
Screen Actors Guild,

which is that you have to
call and check and make sure

that a film is kosher
before you do it.

So I told the actors what
the problem was, and they

were somewhat sympathetic,
but also really

irritated and frustrated,
as makes sense.

Their point of view
was make it go away,

but I couldn't make it go away.

And so the true low light of
all of this whole experience

around Sexual Healing was that
Anthony Edwards, Helen Hunt,

Jason Alexander, Maggie
Wheeler, and Mare Winningham all

had to go before
committees of their peers

and be admonished at
the Screen Actors Guild

for breaking the rules.

And it's no wonder
that I haven't

talked to most of those people
ever since we made the film,

and to this day, I really
regret that all happened

and that there wasn't a
way that I could fix it.

But what made it
even stranger was

that these people were famous
before we started sh**ting,

but got really famous after.

This was just kind of
luck of timing for me,

because after we finished
sh**ting Sexual Healing,

Seinfeld took off, so
Jason was a huge superstar.

Mad About You came into being
and Helen was a huge superstar.

And then ER also premiered and
Anthony Edwards took off, too.

And that was the
bizarre thing, is

that these people
had to take days off

of work from those shows to come
and explain this small, little

independent short film
and how they had gotten

embroiled in the controversy.

What most people don't know
about the movie business

is that for every person who
takes that leap onto the A

list, there are 10 or 50 or 100
people who came really close,

but it just didn't
happen for them.

And that's the
way it was for me.

I had made this film.

As I mentioned, it
did really well,

and I thought it was going to
create an opportunity for me

to become a
writer/director and have

the fabulous
success in Hollywood

that I always imagined,
dreamed up for myself,

and it just didn't come to be.

And I tried and tried and
banged my head against the wall

and wrote more scripts
like you're supposed to do,

and I couldn't even get a
job directing a cartoon,

or writing one for that matter.

So I was heartbroken and
had to lick my wounds,

and eventually I moved on
to writing and co-designing

a graphic adventure game,
and a few other projects,

up in Silicon Valley,
when they were

looking for Hollywood talent.

And then from there, my
life took a number of turns,

and I ultimately became
a personal growth

and spiritual
writer and teacher,

which I am still to this day.

Sometimes I have
to remind people

that I'm the same guy who made
this film because I made it

when I was using Howard
as my first name.

That was my given first name.

But since then, I switched
to my Hebrew middle

name, which is Raphael.

And so I go by
Raphael Cushnir now,

and that's not what's on
the credits of the film,

but I promise it's the same guy.

But I have to be honest
and say that I've

written a couple of
screenplays since then

and the itch is
still there, and I

think of getting back
into the business

at one point or another.

And every time I call
my friends that I

knew from back then in the
'90s, they all say to me, why?

Why would you ever
want to do it?

It's 100 times harder
and 100 times worse

than it was back then, and
it was pretty hard back then.

So I'm chastened by
what they have to share,

but honestly, I think once
you've gotten the taste that I

did, it never
really does go away,

and if there's ever a chance
for me to do it again,

I'll jump at that chance.

So this is 20 years since I made
this film, even though to me it

seems just like yesterday.

And it never came out,
beyond just a few markets,

to the general public once its
short run on Showtime ended.

And that's because
of the odd length.

It's about 41 minutes.

Also because of the contractual
problems that I mentioned.

So I'm thrilled that here on the
20th anniversary of the release

of the film, it's
coming out as a result

of the new distribution
mechanisms-- video

streaming, et cetera.

It's coming out to
the larger public,

and hopefully a lot more
people will get a chance

to see it than ever before.

And also, it just so happens
that 20 years after we

made Sexual Healing,
Helen Hunt made

The Sessions, a movie in which
she plays a sex surrogate

and was nominated
for an Academy Award.

So it's an odd and
kind of interesting

book end to a part
of her career.

She played an innocent
young housewife in 1993

who was introduced to phone
sex, and then 20 years later she

plays someone who's more
experienced than just about all

of us put together in
the realms of sexuality.

And both of those
films, my modest one

and then The Sessions,
obviously a big feature

with a lot of
wonderful nuance to it,

they both showcase sides
of Helen Hunt's talent that

aren't often seen in the
other work that she does,

and that's really
gratifying to be a part of.