01x05 - Episode 5

[bunniefuu]

Welcome to Primark.

I've put my name to this range.

The nerves are setting in.

It's the FA Cup final, mate!
Honest to God, you're Wayne Rooney!

And they're not even joking.

Wayne's challenge is,
"Can I be as good as them?"

[audience chanting] Rooney! Rooney!

Klay! Stop it.

You can't always rely on Wayne.

So, I organise mostly everything.

Everyone knows,
when you finish a round of golf,

you go in the clubhouse and have a beer.

If you haven't got the time to do it,
you don't do it.

It's not like you to feel sad.
Talk to me. What's going on?

I just feel like it's just a bit hard,
just juggling everything.

[♪ Upbeat music playing]

As far back as I can remember,
I've always loved a family holiday.

[Wayne] Coleen, you are ready.

It's all the last little bits
that do me head in,

like chargers and stuff. [chuckles]

It's all worth it, though,
because we do enjoy going on holiday.

If there's sun, it's even better.

The sun always makes everyone happy.

[producer] Do you like the beach?

To me, I couldn't think of anything worse.

[laughs]

[Coleen] I am the one
that organises everything.

Where we're going, how long
we're going for, when we're going.

[producer] Does Wayne help?

[laughs]

[Wayne] Coleen is very particular.

She wants everything to be perfect
and done the right way.

So I don't really get involved.

Not in a million years.

[Kit] What should I hit?

Double ten, but three-three goes each.

This one time, there was, like,


[chuckles] Oh, well.

We are going away
on a family holiday to Portugal.

Holidays are just about having fun.

[screaming]

[Coleen] It's meant to be relaxing.

[Wayne groans] Why did I have kids?

I'll take it slow and easy.

-[Cass] I don't wanna be with Kai!
-[Coleen] Ah! Get down!

But it doesn't always go to plan.

You can't just keep doing what you do,
'cause it's not fair on everyone else.

[♪ Dramatic music playing]

Especially when it's meant
to be a family holiday.

[geese squawking]

He said he's taking
that trophy into school?

[Coleen] He's not. I'm gonna take...
I'm gonna take it.

We're all really looking forward
to the holiday,

but the person
that needs it the most is Kai.

He's been training really hard because
his dream is to become a footballer.

And we've just got some really good news
through from the football club.

They called us to go in yesterday
for a meeting, but I couldn't make it.

But, erm... Yeah, good news.

So yesterday, I found out that
I'm getting a scholarship at the club.

So, er, yeah, that's pretty good.

I've only seen the little clips of him on,
like, social media and stuff.

Is he at that sort of level
where you think, "He's got a chance"?

[Wayne] Yeah, well, I think he's showing
potential and-and good signs.

Erm, he'll be at United now
for the next two years,

and then that's when
they make decisions on you.

[Coleen] What do you think of Kai?

Do you think he's good enough
to be a footballer?

-No.
-[Coleen] No?

-[giggling]
-[Coleen] And you think you are?

[Colette] To see him happy makes us happy.
He knows what he wants out of life.

So he does wanna be a footballer.

Whether he will, we'll see.

[chattering]

[Wayne] I think this is the best age,

now when you're just going
into your last year of school,

and you're-you're right there,
going full time.

Then you...
you never know what happens after.

Good, finish.

[camera shutter clicking]

[Coleen] So, Kai actually getting
the scholarship is a massive deal.

Without one, he might have had
to leave home and find a new club.

So now, I'm just relieved.

And it's the perfect time to celebrate,
as we're all going on holiday as a family.

[doorbell rings]

-[Tony] Hello, everyone.
-[Cass] Grandad!

[Tony exclaims]

[Coleen] Me mum and dad
come on a lot of holidays with us.

We like the company, and we like them
to help out with the kids as well.

[Tony] How's it happening with you, mate?
You all right?

[Coleen] Me mum and dad, you know, they've
got one of them old-school marriages

where me mum has always
looked after me dad, in a way.

But they work well together.

Me dad is the entertainer,
me dad is the active one.

Whereas me mum will be ironing and doing,
you know, whatever she can.

I come in handy.

She likes ironing,
which is-is good. [laughs]

Right, come on.

[Wayne] Kit! Come on!

-[Coleen] Oh, that's heavy.
-[Wayne] Moving out.

Okay. Just one more.

[Cass] Look, there's ours.

Just wondering whether
it'll fit all our luggage on. [laughs]

Can I get a photo of us outside?

[producer] Tell me about
your love of flying.

Flying?

I hate flying.

He's a nightmare in airports.
He just gets all hot and bothered.

[Wayne] For the World Cup in Germany,
we flew back on the plane with the team,

and we'd gone through a thunderstorm,

and it was the worst
I've ever experienced.

The ladies who worked on the plane
sat down, crying.

I think, sometimes,
he just exaggerates. [sighs]

[laughs]

Just get on it, Wayne. We're going away.

-[flight attendant] Just the champagne?
-[Tony] Yes, go on. Yeah, yeah.

-Cheers.
-Cheers.

-Mum!
-[Tony] Oh, Mum. Get in here.

-Cheers.
-Cheers.

[laughter]

-A Buck's Fizz. Yeah.
-[Colette] What do they call it?

A mimosa.

-[Tony] Mimosa, yeah.
-Mimosa.

[Tony] Oh, brilliant.

We went... Our first holiday together,
we went to...

Where did we go?

-Miami.
-Went to Miami. We were 17.

We went out on a boat,
and me dad had a vest on.

And he's, like, fair skin like me.

-When we got off, I remember his blisters...
-[Tony] Ah, yeah.

-And he was like...
-[Tony] Yeah.

Fantastic. You know what I mean?

How lucky you are to be able
to just-just do this.

You know what I mean?

Fantastic.

[Colette] When Coleen was little,
we had a caravan. A little caravan.

Didn't have a toilet in it.

You used to have to wee in a bucket.

But they were the best days.

And they-they're the days our kids say,

"Mum, Dad,
they're what we really remember.

They're what we're thankful for."

[Coleen] We had unbelievable times
in that caravan.

Me dad would take us down to the beach.

It was things that didn't cost much money,

but it was fun,
and they were willing to do with us.

[Colette] And, even now, I say to them,
"Don't wish your kids' lives away."

You can't wait for them to grow up.
You can't wait for them...

No, en-enjoy them now,

because you're not gonna get
them times back.

-[giggling]
-Look.

[Wayne] I think it's really important,
you know, the time you have, erm,

for holidays with-with your children.

Them memories are-are special.

[Coleen] I think life is just
about creating memories,

but there's something extra special
about going away as a family

and creating them.

I love Portugal.

I like the food, I like the people,
and I love the weather.

Holidays are just about having fun.

We're staying in a place
called Quinta do Iago.

It's a stunning complex on a golf course,

so it's got lots of sporty activities.

I like to know that we're all
going to have a good time.

But it doesn't always happen.

Any holidays with the kids, it's hectic.

Especially boys, I feel like
they-they want you to play with them.

[Kit] I don't.

You can't play tennis. Or, or cricket.

[Coleen] I'll have a go at badminton.

You can't play badminton.

[Coleen] When we arrive at a villa
on holiday...

Thank you.

All I wanna do is get in and get sorted.

[Wayne] When we first get to a villa,

it's mad crazy.

-[Cass] Grandad, come here!
-[Tony] What is it?

It's a movie room!

The kids just wanna get to know
the place where we're staying.

They're curious.

[Tony] Oh! You found what?

-[Cass] I found a dead bird.
-[Tony] Aw, did you?

And, like, you can see its face and stuff.

[♪ Quirky music playing]

[zipper zips]

Seen me Crocs? I went to JD yesterday.

[Coleen groans]

Comfortable.

[Coleen] Oh, they're terrible.

I'm not really big
into fashion or clothes.

You just got to try and keep it simple.

[chuckles]

For his birthday,
we had bought him some personalised Crocs.

They were the best present that he'd got.

He was so excited, he put them on.

Shoes were off, Crocs were on.

I'm-I'm putting 'em on now.

[Coleen] Oh, don't, please.

I... I don't like them.

It's sick.

I think everyone is on
their own fashion journey.

[laughs]

So, Kai and Klay!

You two are gonna have to... share.

[sighs] This is where I get stressed.

[Coleen] Wayne just thinks,
"Oh, she needs everything to be perfect."

But it's not that.
It's just, I can think straight.

This has to go back downstairs. Sorry.

She will spend a whole three hours
unpacking. It's nuts.

[Cass] This can be mine.

Yeah. No, you're downstairs
with... with Kai.

-This can be Klay's, and K...
-[Cass] I don't wanna be with Kai.

I don't want to be with Kai!

-I want to be by myself.
-[Coleen] You can't.

There isn't enough rooms
for everyone to be by themselves.

[Cass screams]

[Wayne] Why did I have kids?

I hate this. This is...

Whether you're in a hotel or a villa,

when you first come in,
and this part, it just stresses me out.

[Coleen] Ah! Get down!
Do not climb over there.

If you fall over there, you're dead!

He's climbing over a balcony!

[Wayne groans]

[grunts]

Just wanna get out of here.

[Coleen] It's non-stop.

So, to make life easier for us all,
I take charge.

[laughs]

[Wayne] Col, what one of these
do you want coming up?

Erm, all of them.

She's the organiser. She's the bossy one.

But then,
I can say that was like me and Tony.

Ain't that nice, innit? Hey? Lovely.

Tony's never put a thing
in a case in his life.

Tony's 66 now.

Er...

[chuckles]

[Coleen] It's definitely easier
if the men take the kids off,

and leave me and Mum to it.

My mum knows how I like things.

[Colette] His swim stuff,
his football kits, his going-out gear.

Shoes on the bottom floor.

Think I'm done now.

But me mum is slacking
a bit in certain ways.

-[producer] What's happening here, Coleen?
-Oh, I'm just...

Me mum's unpacked, but... [chuckles]

I'm rearranging it.

Nothing's wrong with it,
but it's just not how I were to do it.

I unpacked some of the boys' things.

When I'd gone out the room,
she went in and moved them all.

She's worse than me now.

[Coleen] Right, I'm getting a drink.

Oh, I've got a lot to answer, haven't I?

-[cork pops]
-Oh!

sh*t. [chuckles]

Oh. Oh! Nice. Oh, what's that?

Okay. Yeah, no then.

[♪ Upbeat music playing]

[Colette] Feels good now sitting here
knowing it's all done, doesn't it?

I think this holiday is gonna do you good,

to relax after everything
you've been doing.

When we're at home,
there's always something that needs doing

-or someone to get back to...
-Yeah. Yeah.

Or someone to take somewhere.

Whereas, when you're on holiday,
it's quite nice that everyone can-can...

-Chill together.
-Chill and... Yeah.

'Cause I don't feel like I have time
to actually play with the kids.

-It's my fault for having four kids.
-Yeah, but...

Because it's just
keeping them entertained 24/7.

But I suppose that's always been the case,
especially for the mum.

I think, well, that's what...
You were like that, wasn't you?

Yeah.

And I think 'cause Wayne hasn't
been around as much because of work,

he struggles with that
sometimes, because...

it-it hasn't been natural to him
to-to-to-to be there.

-So now he's got a bit more time.
-Time.

[Coleen] I hope he makes
the most of the time he has here.

-How many words?
-[Colette] Four words.

[Coleen] So, what's the first word?
Act out the first word.

Little?

-[Colette] Red.
-[Coleen] Little Red Riding Hood.

-Yeah.
-[Coleen, Colette laughing]

[Coleen] Now, school is out
for the summer,

I've just had an email come through
with the end-of-year school reports.

Coleen made the mistake of reading
my school reports to the kids.

It said... he was always late to lessons

because he was gambling
on the school yard.

Like, it was just not good at all.

But, no, mine... were very, very good.

I-I wouldn't say I was,
like, a geeky student.

-Was I geeky?
-Yeah.

-I wasn't. I wasn't. I wasn't.
-She was.

-The glasses and all that...
-Yeah, I wore glasses.

[Coleen] Cass is our entertainer.

He's a sweetheart, most of the time,
but he never stops talking.

-You had a good holiday so far?
-Er, not really. [screams]

[Coleen] So I hope he hasn't been
chatting too much in class.

Your... Your report...
I got your report this morning.

What?

-Very good. Very good.
-[giggles]

So, for his grades,
he got an A in reading,

a B in writing, and a A in maths.

We're all very proud.

"Cass arrives at school each day
with a big smile and positive attitude."

While he is always keen to participate,

"he is learning to take turns
and allow others to share their views."

Do you always wanna speak?

[chuckles]

[Coleen] "I will miss his cheerful nature
and wish him the best in year three."

Good that he's happy.

That's the thing,
is that he's happy in school.

-[Cass] "A."
-Very good.

-[Cass] "Two."
-Very good.

He actually... He enjoys school.
So, that's good.

See how long that lasts for. [chuckles]

Vimto. Yes!

[blows raspberry, laughs]

[Coleen] Kit can be hard work and full-on.

-Come with me. Come with me.
-[laughing]

[Coleen] But he has got
a sensitive side to him.

Sit up. Stop it. No, kids.

-Let go... [mumbling]
-[laughing]

[both laughing]

[Coleen] As far as I know,
Kit works hard at school,

so I hope his report reflects that.

"One of the highlights of the year
was seeing Kit excel

at the Manchester City
football tournament.

His energy, skill, and enthusiasm
on the pitch was fantastic to see

and a real credit to him."

"Kit is a cheerful
and increasingly confident learner

who enjoys creative tasks
and group activities.

His enthusiasm for reading
and role-play has grown.

Keep working hard in year five, Kit."

For me, to hear
that his confidence has grown,

that's something that he struggles with,
is a massive step for him.

Oh, oh...

Yes!

To hear someone else, you know,
talk about your child like that is-is...

is what you want as a parent.

[Wayne] I see myself in the boys.

What I'm trying to do
is prepare them for life.

To be a... a good person
and prepare them to be-be a man.

[laughing]

But, yeah, it's hard work. [laughs]

[Cass chuckles, exclaims]

Stop it. What are you doing?

[exclaims]

I'm the oldest to two brothers.

I was exactly the same.
You wind your younger brothers up.

-[Klay] Ah, Mum, he pushed me.
-[Coleen] Kai.

[producer 2] So, he gets it from you?

Erm, probably yeah.

-Kai, you know that washing machine?
-[Kai] Yep.

[Colette] I-Is it in Spanish?

-Why would it be in Spanish?
-Just go and have a look.

We're in Portugal, love.

[chuckles]

[in Spanish] I am Kai Rooney,
I am 15 years old

and I am a footballer
for Manchester United.

[chuckles]

Oh, yeah, actually is.

-It's-It's in Spanish?
-Yeah.

-Well, you need to read it to me.
-[Kai] What one have you got it on?

It's a really important year
for Kai this year.

He's doing, like, GCSE mocks,
and then next year, he'll do his GCSEs.

So, when-when do you get your results?

[Kai] Already got 'em.

-[Colette] You've had them?
-[Kai] Yeah.

[Colette] What were they?

Basically, I got just above an A.

-He's doing well, isn't he?
-[Coleen] Yeah.

But he's also at an important stage
in his football journey.

So there's gonna be
a lot of decisions made.

I was, like, just below, but then I've
dropped a subject because obviously I've...

-So...
-I've-I've dropped a subject

-that I did bad in...
-Yeah.

Because I've got, like,
football next year,

and I've not got the time to, like,
do them all.

At home, we don't get a lot of time
just us together

and without the other ones being around.

The intention of going away
is to check in with them

on a one-to-one basis.

His mindset is football,
football, football,

and it's hard to snap him
out of it sometimes.

So, it's gonna be a big year, isn't it,
next year?

-You got, like, school and football.
-Yeah.

I think, missing that,
missing school time,

you're gonna have to work harder,
aren't you?

Yeah.

[Coleen] When you think of it,

Wayne was playing first-team football
at this age now.

He was capable at school, but didn't try.

He only had football on his mind.

If Wayne put an effort
into his schoolwork,

he would've come away with results.

[Kai] Well, football...
football already is, like, my priority.

To me. I know it's not to you.

[Coleen] You say I go on
about school and stuff,

but I just think
you're good enough to have a...

an academic back-up as well.

Yeah, and I will,

but I'm not gonna go all out
with school after... after next year.

I wanna be a footballer, and I will be.

So...

Do you know how hard it is
to make it as a footballer?

Yeah, but I will be.

[Coleen chuckles]

When I was younger,
I wanted to go to university.

I wanted to get, erm, a degree,
but I didn't.

So, I would hate for Kai
to-to waste his education.

You're naturally academic in certain ways,

whereas I had to really work hard
to get the grades.

I'm full-time at football... [mutters]

I know, but as long as you...

-you put some...
-So it's my job. It's my job then, innit?

Some time aside to do the, you know...

to work on your A-levels, then...

Yeah. No, I will, but...

work comes first, doesn't it?

[Coleen] It was nice to catch up with Kai.

I think he did take a lot of it onboard,
but, you know, we'll see.

You are turning into a...

a nice young man.

-[Kai] I'm just a chill guy.
-Just a chill guy.

You just... You just need to start
picking up your towels.

[chuckles]

Right. One each.

Come on. Come on. Get your hands up.

So, it's been a bit of a late start
this morning.

[Kai] Where's Dad? Is he not getting up?

[Coleen] Still in bed.

Last night, we went out
with me mum and dad and the kids.

Klay!

Go and eat your breakfast.

It was a family gathering,

but then it turned into a lads' night out.

Wayne!

[Wayne groans]

[Coleen] Wayne and me dad
decided to stay out.

[producer] And what time did he get in?

[Coleen] I don't know.
Maybe three o'clock?

We did have to go
and check whether he was still alive.

[groans]

Me friends come over here,
and we stayed out late. [laughs]

[producer 2] How was last night?

Erm...

Bit tired.

[producer] So, Tony, you're the only
person that can clear this up for us.

-Can you just tell us what happened?
-[Tony, Colette laugh]

Wayne got into trouble.

Staying out all night.
What was your excuse?

I was looking for him.

-[laughing] He was looking for him.
-[laughing]

And you never even had any shoes on.
Do you know that?

I've-I've-I've took too many punches
over the years.

I mean, that's why I forget things.
You know what I mean? I...

-When it's appropriate.
-[laughs]

[Coleen] Come on.

We're all entitled to have a night out,
but do it in the right way.

You all right, mate, eh?

I could come in
at three o'clock in the morning,

but I still get up
and function the next day.

Today is gonna be hard.

A full day at the beach with four boys
and an exhausted husband.

[Wayne sighs]

-[Coleen] What could go wrong?
-[groans]

-[Cass] Mum!
-Hi.

[Tony] Let's start digging here, eh, eh?

[Kit] This beach is better than
the usual place, isn't it? It's nicer.

[Tony exclaiming]

We've got a swimming pool now.

-[Coleen] Anyone want ice cream?
-[Kit] Calippo.

[Coleen] When you bring kids to beaches,
it's-it's very active.

They're in one minute, then they're out,
then they want to go and get ice cream,

then they want to go
and buy something from the shop.

-Mum!
-[Coleen] Yeah?

-Did you see anything in the water? Fish...
-[Kit] Octopus.

You never seen an octopus.

[Kit] I didn't see an octopus, but I saw...
I saw some salmon.

-Salmon?
-Yeah.

[Colette] Sometimes,
I wish she'd slow down.

[chuckles] Oh, she-she doesn't stop.

[Coleen] Don't throw sand.
Do not throw sand.

Do not! Ca-Cass! No!

It'll be nice to-to have
a little bit of time to relax.

[exhales] It's roasting.

[Colette] When you're a footballer,

you've never really been at home
seven days a week.

So, it must be hard for Wayne
when you haven't lived at home

with your family all them years.

But when your husband's back, you know,
you want him to share the load.

To be honest, we're not really
on good terms at the minute.

[chuckles] I think that's why
he's sitting there and I'm sitting here.

Today's been a good day, but Wayne's not
been able to help out much with the kids.

[groans]

-You've been dying today on this beach.
-What?

You've been dying today on this beach.

Been dying? Why?

No, 'cause you don't like the beach,

but then, of course
you'd have had hardly any sleep.

No, I'm fine.

It's been a bit of a lad's holiday
for you, hasn't it?

[Wayne] No.

-[Coleen] It has.
-How?

So, staying up all night
with your-your mates...

Erm...

You know, it's-it's hard.
I said to you before that...

when the season's
finished now... [stammers]

I'm not doing... not working,
not doing anything.

It's tough, and...

I know, but how many years
have you had to get use to it?

So, every time you're off,
you can't just keep doing what you do.

Especially when it's meant
to be a family holiday.

'Cause it's not fair on everyone else.

And you wonder why I moan,
and I get called the moaner off everyone,

but it's me picking up the pieces
all the time.

But you are making it harder for me.

The thing is, he's not an arguer.

And sometimes,
I do want him to give me something back.

Sometimes, it's just like
arguing with a brick wall.

So, I just never come home,
and then didn't get up in the morning

and take care of the kids.

What would the kids do then?

No one's making you do it.

But it never changes.

It always happens, and it's like,
"Well, is that gonna be life?"

I still love him,
but there is times where I think,

"Is the answer to see
what it's like if we were separated?"

It's only you that can f...

that can fix it,
because no one else is doing it.

-Time's the restaurant booked?
-Pardon?

-What time's the restaurant booked?
-[scoffing]

At this moment in time,
we're not best friends.

I'm just hoping that...

things change.

[producer] Why do you love him?

I don't know. [laughs]

I think I've been asked that
a lot of times over the years.

I... You can't help loving
someone, can you?

You know, that's the thing is, I can...

He can be annoying,
and he can be a pain in the arse,

but he is a good dad, and he is funny.

He does make us laugh.

But, yeah, it's all...

it's all down to love.

[Wayne] I know, myself,
there's things I can do better.

So there's no point in arguing, is there?
I get it.

That day,
I didn't put the effort in with the kids.

And to be honest, she's probably right.

Who wants to play cricket?

Go on. I'll play.

You have to bowl. Do you know how to bowl?

[Wayne] Yeah.

-[huffs] Yes!
-Oh, yes!

[Wayne] Coleen's... She's very strong.

If she's got something to say,
she'll say it.

I know what she was saying, really,
that bringing four young boys up is tough.

Erm, so it's important that we enjoy
moments and times with them now,

because, erm, time goes quick.

Do you think there's more
grains of sand than stars?

-Yeah? There's more stars.
-Is there more stars?

Yeah.

[Coleen] Cass?

-[Cass] Mum!
-Yeah?

[Cass] Guess the shark's name.

-Erm, Steve.
-[Cass] No!

-[Colette chuckles] Why'd you say Steve?
-That's a name. Steve.

At home, it's very rare we can sit down
and have dinner together.

Colette, what are we...
What are we having for dinner?

What you're having?

You're getting nothing.

[chuckling] Is that right?

[Colette] Got you a nice steak.

Make sure you get this on camera,
Coleen doing the dinner.

[producer] Can Coleen cook?

Erm, she... she can do the odd thing.

[laughs]

-[Kai] She always burns the toast.
-[Coleen scoffs] I don't burn toast.

The amount of times I see smoke
coming from the toaster, and you're like...

And I'm like, "Mum,"
and you're like, "Oh, sh*t."

[Colette] Yeah,
that's 'cause she's left it...

It's 'cause I've gone and done
something else. I was occupied.

Not 'cause of I...
I don't know how to cook toast.

[laughs]

-"Who eats the most?"
-Dad.

Me. I think it's me.

-Kai.
-[Coleen] Kai and then...

No, I would say Kai and then Kit.

-I-I eat loads.
-[Wayne] Yeah.

Klay don't eat nothing. [chuckles]

No, Klay only eats crisps.

She forgets to eat.
So, I have to keep reminding her

-that's she's gotta eat.
-Stop having a go at me.

[sighs]

[Colette] How many years now
have youse been married?

-[Wayne] Seventeen.
-What's it, 17?

Was it?

-We've been together 23 years.
-Yeah.

-Yeah. Can you blame him?
-Right.

[Colette] Aye.

It's, like, more than half me life.

I think family values are...

it's important,
and when you do get married,

you take that vow.

You know, you're gonna have times
where you've made a mistake,

but I-I wanna be better.

I wanna be the best husband,
dad, I can be.

Erm, and I take that responsibility
serious as well.

-[Colette] Wayne's very blessed.
-Aye.

[Colette] And he knows, don't ya? Coleen.

-You took her off our hands. [laughing]
-[Tony laughing] Yeah.

That's what he was gonna say.

Me and Tony have been married 45 years.

It is a long time.

I've been very patient.

[imitating Colette] You've been hard work
over all these years.

-[laughs]
-I don't know how I've done it.

[laughing]

[producer] What's the key
to a happy marriage?

[inhales deeply]

Go on, To. What's your opinion?

That's a hard one. You know what I mean?

I think there's always been respect there.

You know, she's respected me
and I've respected her.

-You should wear it.
-That's lovely, innit?

Yo!

-[Colette] It is a partnership, isn't it?
-[Tony] Yeah.

You go through ups and downs
and, you know...

And you're lucky to stay together.

I think, as time goes on, you realise
how much, you know, people mean to you,

you know what I mean?

Can you see us?

[Colette] If they stay strong together,
work at it, I think they'll be fine.

We've renewed our vows.
Do you think youse will ever do that?

-We nearly did in Vegas.
-[Colette] Did ya? In one of them...

We went, and it was closed.

For some reason,
she was in the shopping trolley,

and I was pushing her.

Then we went to McDonald's,
she's in the trolley,

I'm pushing her through the drive-through.

There's a car in the front, a car behind.
We're just stood there waiting.

[all chuckling]

That's a memory, isn't it?

[Coleen] We still love each other.

Mum, do you have a plate?

But we just need to know
how to communicate a bit better.

Because, at the end of the day,
we're lucky to-to have each other.

Marriage is tough.
And you need to put the work in,

and the time and the dedication.

Right. Cheers.

-[Tony, Colette] Cheers, everyone.
-[Kai] Cheers, Mum.

[Colette, Coleen] Cheers.

Isn't this lovely, all being together?

She's the woman who I always
wanted to be with for the rest of my life,

and, erm, nothing has changed from that.

[♪ Upbeat music playing]

On holiday,
it's just about us and-and having fun.

-[producer] Who's gonna win?
-My dad.

The kids love it
when they get to see us relax a bit.

[producer] What about your mum?

She can't play tennis.

[Wayne grunts]

When everyone's together,
I think it's special.

Mum.

Powerful shot.

[Coleen] The last few days,
we've managed to pack in quite a bit.

The boys dragged us out to play golf.

[Tony] Nice one, Kit.
Nice shot, nice shot.

[all exclaim]

[Coleen] And we had a trip
to the water park.

But the only problem with holidays
is they fly by too fast.

Last day today.

Packing up all the suitcases.

Time to go home.

[alarm ringing]

[Coleen] Kit!

Klay!

Are you up?

[Cass] Coming.

[Coleen] What you want to eat?

So today is the first day back
after the summer holidays.

Erm, we've had a busy summer,
but it's been great.

Last night, they seemed excited,

but they haven't
been used to getting up early.

So, it'll take a few days
getting in routine, really.

Wait, you need to wipe your face.

[Kit] Mum, just leave me alone.

[Coleen] I can still remember
those first days back at school.

I felt really excited
and nervous at the same time.

[Tony] Coleen looks lovely.

[Coleen] And then me mum and dad
would always make us pose for a picture

in our new school uniforms.

[Tony] All ready for school, eh?

[Coleen] I still make my boys
do exactly the same,

which, of course, they love doing.

-You taking the picture or what?
-Pardon? I'm coming right now.

[Klay] School starts in ten minutes.

I'm not fussing, I know,

but you're tucking your shirt in
for the photo. You are.

[Klay] I'm not getting
in the picture with them.

You are, you're getting one together
and then you're getting one on your own.

You are. Go on,
all get in together. Smile.

[Coleen] Obviously, this year
is gonna be full-on for Kai...

as he has his GCSEs

and he's desperate
to make a good impression

with his scholarship
for Manchester United.

[commentator] That's a great touch
and a really good return ball as well.

Rooney to finish things off
for Manchester United.

Brilliant finish!

What a calm, slotted,
left-foot effort that is from Rooney.

All I want, really, to just keep going
and keep pushing for more.

Keep playing up
for the rest of the season.

And then it's all down to me
to making that happen.

[commentator] Rooney...

Rooney's shot!

[Kai] Should all go to plan.

[keyboard tapping]

[Kai] I was going into training and then...

someone's booted the ball out
right next to me.

And then, it's whacked my foot and then,

it's just done my ankle.

[Coleen] I'm gutted for him.

[chuckles] What you watching?

I just hope it's not too serious.

Do you not need all your books tomorrow?

[producer] Do you like surprises?

No. Why?

[Coleen] I need to think
about your birthday.

-I don't want a party.
-[chuckles]

The helicopters...
Will they all land at the same time?

That's ridiculous.

[Wayne] I hate birthdays.

[Coleen] I love doing things
that no one's gonna be prepared for.

[all cheering]

[producer] What happened?