01x23 - Late Fee/Bullhop

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Rise of the ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Rise of the ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ♪

♪ Rising up against evil paint the city green ♪

♪ Raph is ready for a fight Leo's making a scene ♪

♪ Mikey's got mad skills Donnie rocks machines ♪

♪ With each other they discover ♪

♪ Their destiny and rise ♪

♪ Cowabunga ♪

♪ Rise of the ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ♪

♪ Rise ♪

- I'm calling it now, boys.

This will be our easiest mission ever.

- Yes! Dad said all we have to do

is return this one Lou Jitsu DVD he rented for us--

- Back to the video store before midnight

and I will give you all hugs

and um, I will also throw in-- - Ah!

- Yes! - Deal!

- No take backs!

[tires screeching]

- I forget. What happens if we don't return

the DVD before midnight?

- Then Splinter gets charged extra.

It's called a... "late fee."

- Or was it zombie apocalypse?

I don't remember, but we can't afford either.

Now let's return this DVD so we can go home and get hugs.

- All right! Hugs! - h*-h*, yeah!

Great call on the disguises, guys.

They really help us blend in with all the people--

[wind howls]

Wait, where is everyone?

[all scream]

[tools whirring, bell dinging]

[foghorn blares] - That didn't go so well,

but on the upside, we get to ride the ferry

to another DVD store!

- So we didn't see all the "warning: demolition" signs.

No biggie. - Yeah.

And my horoscope didn't say anything

about reading signs so--oh! Wet paint?

My horoscope betrayed me. We're cursed!

We'll never return our DVD before midnight!

- Easy, Michael. Easy.

Back in ancient times, early ,

there were boxes, or "kiosks,"

where you could rent and/or return DVDs,

and I just plotted every one in New York

to the Tank's GPS, you're welcome,

so as soon as we dock-- - We can finish our mission

and go get Splinter's warm and fuzzy hugs?

- Yes! And the ferry's just about ready to dock.

- Easiest mission ever! - Uh, folks, a, uh,

movie production has the harbor, uhh, closed.

[foghorn blares]

[g*nf*re, planes whooshing]

- [roaring]

- Cut! Cut-cut-cut!

Find that monkey's talent and bring it to set!

- New York. What a town.

- We're stuck! Oh!

Now I'll never know if Splinter's whiskers tickle.

- Oh, you will know, Mikey. New plan!

We swim to the nearest DVD kiosk.

- Which is approximately . nautical miles that direction.

- Still a piece of cake.

[adventurous music]

[video game beeping, playful music]

- Okay, okay, okay, my turn.

If Lou Jitsu and Jupiter Jim

make a crossover movie,

and that movie is a kid

with pro basketball skills:

that's me, baby!

- Not bad, not bad. But look.

- [groans] - The DVD kiosk!

- Ah, the sweet stink of victory.

- Gentlemen, we clear a path to the return slot:

we are home free.

- Easiest. Mission. Ever.

- [screeching] [all scream]

- [squealing] - No!

No, no, no, no, no! Bad mutant Silverfish.

- [squawks] - Save the kiosk!

- Ah-ee-yah! - [screeching]

- Ow!

- [groaning]

- [throaty screeches]

- [groans]

[yelping]

- Raph-a-roni's got a New York treat for ya...

Eat this, bug!

[grunts]

[electricity crackles]

[all screeching]

[nervous chuckle] Wha--oops. My bad.

- It's fine. We're fine.

It's two hours before midnight

and Donnie said there's tons

of these DVD kiosks nearby,

right, Donnie baby?

- Phew, okay. There's the next kiosk.

Raph, if you would, please.

- Um, excuse me, sir--

- You shall not pass!

- Oh, what a town. - Ugh.

We don't have time for this. Next!

[light hip-hop music]

[foghorn honks]

- Okay, here we are, boys, with plenty of time to spare.

[subway train whooshes]

- Raph, if you would please do the honors and return our DVD.

♪ ♪

- Well, uh--[nervous chuckle]

Hey, uh, have you guys seen--

all: Seriously? - Oh. Yeah.

I left the DVD in the Tank where it's safe

when Donnie made us swim across the harbor.

- Gasp! That was your idea!

- Well, sometimes Raph's ideas and mistakes

are the same thing, all right? - [groans]

This was supposed to be easy.

- New, new plan.

- It's been a few hours, so I bet that ferry is

back at the dock. Let's go get our Tank and DVD.

- The ferry's too far, and we're running out of time.

We'll never get Splinter's hugs!

- In that case, for speed, efficiency, and fun,

may I suggest New York's most enjoyably unreliable

and deliciously claustrophobic mode of transit?

The subway! both: Ah.

- [growling]

- Whose hand is that? That's a hand, right?

Who is touching me? - I feel like I can feel

Dad's hugs, and spoiler alert,

they are plush.

- You have invaded the Dragonmaster's personal space!

- Harbor Ferry, exit now.

- New York. What a town.

- [panting, grunts]

[giddy tip-toeing]

- Okay, I'm up, I'm up. Ready?

If Halley's Comet and improvisational comedy

had a kid with a mysterious superstar's leather jacket:

that is me.

- A DVD kiosk! all: Yes!

- My horoscope said I would point out the obvious today.

- Raph was parked next to this the whole time!

- Relax. We're here. We made it!

- And with a little time to spare!

BRB with the DVD, B-R-O-Ses.

all: Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! [scream]

Brake-brake-brake-brake! Brake!

[electricity sizzles]

[kiosk powers down]

[solemn music]

all: No!

- What else could possibly go wrong?

- Peek-a-boo,tortugas.

Yoink!

all: Ghostbear?

- Last time we met,

you ruined my pro wrestling career.

both: Hurricane!

[dinging]

- [groaning]

- Cowabunga!

- Now, I will ruin what you love.

Starting with your precious disc of video.

Lou Jitsu movies are estúpido.

- You take that back!

Unless estúpido means "brilliant!"

- [cackling]

- New, new-new plan. Tortoise gets the bear.

all: Yes.

[tires squealing]

- Youtortugas can't catch me!

- Why are there wizards in the middle of the street?

- It's Wizard Con, baby!

- Slay the steel dragon!

- Hey! I'm casting here!

- Leo, Mikey, launch the Shell Hogs.

- [laughs] Oh, I love your little tricycle!

- You shall not pass!

- Ah!

[tires screeching]

[crashes]

[electricity fizzles]

- I can fix this. I can fix this.

I can totally fix this! - Hey, Donnie.

If you got any more secret vehicles,

now's the time to be a good brother and share.

- Uh, well, there is this one thing.

But I haven't tested it yet, so...

- Tests are easy. It's answers that are hard.

- I love you so much. Let's do it!

[engine powering up]

[car horns honking]

[dramatic music]

- Give us back our DVD, Ghost-jerk!

[chain clanking]

- Make me,bufón naranja!

- Ow!

Raph, Donnie, where are you guys?

both: Coming in fast!

- This is awesome!

- Where'd everybody go!?

- That gives me a reckless idea!

- [grunts] - [blows raspberry]

♪ ♪

Come on, portal, portal, portal!

Yeah! - You're blocking the portal!

- Oh, no.

[both scream]

[all scream]

[thudding]

- Savage wizardry! What black magic was that?

- Look! Another DVD store.

If we get ours back, we can still pull this off!

[both screaming]

Ah!

[heavy breath]

Two minutes to midnight, maidens.

- [laughing hysterically]

You fell out of the sky like, "Wah!"

And ruined your little toy.

- You have no idea what we've been through tonight.

And on top of it all you steal our DVD?

- Is that any way to treat a fan?

- Here we go. - Groan.

- Nya-nya-nya.

I can tell how much you want

this DVD... for watching.

- Actually, we really need to return--

[chokes] - Eh-eh-eh.

Return to the first scene because, uh,

we want to watch it so badly.

- Yeah. Only the cruelest of villains

would drop our DVD in that return slot over there

and then confirm that it did in fact drop all the way down.

- Ooh. Foolish,tortugas!

Never reveal your weakness to an enemy.

[giddy murmur]

[nervous whining]

[louder nervous whining]

- Ha! Now you will never watch the movie!

Admit it, I have ruined your--huh?

Huh?

No!

[character speaking foreign language]

- [gasps] - We returned your DVD.

And now you owe us...

all: Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! - It's happening!

- Okay, you have earned...this! all: Yeah!

[murmuring happily]

- [choked up] Ah, I will never forget this feeling.

- I love all my sons.

All five of you.

- [strained] New York. What a town!

[sirens wail, whoop]

- Purple Rain, do you see the target?

Purple Rain?

- As we pan across the asphalt savanna,

we find the noble Bullhop.

- Survival in these cruel streets will require

harnessing all of his fine-tuned natural instincts.

- Ah! [nervous whine]

[screaming, groaning]

[shudders]

[alarms sounding] Ah!

[people clamoring]

Oh, boy. [nervous screaming]

- And the king of the vertical veldt

will go hungry again-- - Donnie! Quit messing around.

Where is the target?

- Why must you always put science on the back burner?

[sighs] Bullhop is in the alley by Big Mama's hotel, ya happy?

- [sniffles, sighs]

I used to be somebody. [huffs]

I was the best bellhop in town until those turtles showed up.

[bones cracking]

[screams]

[roars]

[confused grunting]

They ruined everything.

[crashing] Huh? Huh?

[suspenseful music]

Uh, what?

Ah!

You'll never take me! Oh! Ah!

Oh. - Ugh.

Now I'm not gonna get to test my tranquilizer dart.

[dart injects]

- Huh?

- [groans softly] Where am I?

[gasps] - Hey, bud.

You may not remember us-- - Oh, I do!

You're those bug-hunting buffoons

who turned me into a klutzy bull!

- He remembers us!

- Look, we were trying to stop those oozesquitoes.

- In fact, we, strike that--I built

this technologically astounding BugSlapper

so we could catch them all. - But...

it ran out of Big Mama's web goo, so...fail!

- Anywizzle, we feel pretty bad about what happened.

- So, we Mad Dogs are gonna make it up to you

by showing you the best day ever.

- You mean, you're just gonna be nice to me

without expecting anything in return?

- Mm-hmm. - Wow.

That's how we do it in my native Etobicoke, Canada.

- Happy Bullhop Appreciation Day!

- [chewing noisily]

[nervous murmuring]

[cheering]

Mm...mm-hmm.

[rock music]

[cheering]

- Ah! - [groaning]

- [chewing loudly] - What?

- [grunting]

[operatic singing, screams]

[cheering] [crashing]

Boo-yah! Ha-ha, yeah, baby!

Ah, man! [laughs]

[dramatic music]

- Okay, Big Mama's party's tonight.

This is our chance to get some web goo.

Here's the plan: we go in dressed as waiters,

sneak on past her, and nab the keys to her vault,

where she stores her goo.

It'll be like taking candy from a--

[thudding] [grumbles]

[all gasp]

- [grunting]

[sighs]

[gulping] Hm.

- That's it. He has to go.

- Yeah! We've gotta sneak into that party tonight.

We can't leave him here and we sure can't take him with us.

- But I feel terrible!

We're the ones who made him into this.

- Guys, I'm Dr. Delicate Touch.

Let me handle this. - Uh-huh.

- Bullhop, we're friends, so this will be very easy to say:

You got to go! Hit the bricks, Slappy!

- What? You're kicking me out? - That's right.

You have been working a nerve, hoser!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's take it easy--

are you wiping your mouth with my Jupiter Jim comic?

- Nope.

I'm sorry! Please. Let me make it up to you.

- No way,chico. We've got a big mission tonight

and we don't have time for...this whole situation.

- A mission? I can help!

- No way.

We're sneaking into Big Mama's to snag her web goo.

A klutz like you would only get us caught.

- [sniffles] I wasn't a klutz until I met you guys.

- [sighs]

O-okay, if you can just sit here

and not break anything till we get back,

we'll talk, okay?

- Mm-hmm.

Or I could...

- I don't hear any sobbing, so it must be going okay.

Mmm. Unless he's just crying silently on the inside.

- Good news, guys: I totally punted.

We'll do our dangerous mission

and deal with the unpleasantness later.

- Ah, okay. Let's get to Big Mama's gala!

[whiny gasp]

- I don't even have to turn around

to see how this turned out.

Well, I've turned around, and I see.

- Looks like Goldilocks tried on all your waiter outfits

before he got to mine.

- Would he really be insane enough

to try to make up for everything

by doing our dangerous mission on his own--

of course he would. Let's go!

[creature squeals, giggles]

[light festive music playing]

[indistinct chatter]

- [wails]

- [murmuring]

- [breathes deeply]

- Oh, man, I never should have told him our plan.

Donnie, what are the odds he can pull this off?

- The guy once broke a pillow,

so, %, he said, overconfidently?

- Okay, I'm in.

Just need to find the guy who has the keys

to Big Mama's web goo room and "borrow" them.

- Who's he talking to? - I told him earlier

that if he touched his ear he could talk

to anybody in the world.

I was trying to get some work done.

- Roger that, Mr. President.

- Hors d'oeuvre? Finger food?

Canapé? Hm.

I found the keys to the web goo room.

Engage. - Oh, I read his lips.

He's engaging. Perfect...

- [humming] Just gotta get to that giant owl-man and--

- Well, hello, cutie noodle.

- [screams] Big Mama!

Abort! Abort, abort, abor--ah!

- Mmm, I haven't seen you before.

Are you new here? - No! I'm the bellhop

who used to work-- - Bullhop!

Don't blow your cover!

- I mean, yes.

They brought me in from Etobicoke

to lend this place a little Canadian class.

- Big Mama doesn't normally fraternize with the staff,

but do you cut a rug?

Jum and jeevy?

Trip the light splendiferous?

- I don't know what most of that means, but sure!

[cheers and applause]

- That is not good.

- Hmm.

- [nervous murmur]

[dance music building]

♪ ♪

[chuckles]

[murmuring, wails]

[groans]

Hmm.

♪ ♪

both: Whoa!

- That boy can move, baby!

- [screams] - [muffled scream]

- [murmurs happily]

- [chuckles]

- He actually did it!

He's got the keys! We got to get down there.

[all scream]

- Well, that's the fast way down.

[all gasp]

- Guys! I've got the keys!

- The Turtle-boos! Get them!

- Oh. - Uh-oh!

- [growling] Ah-hoo!

[both groan] - Huh?

Bullhop! The keys!

- [grunting]

- Yes!

Hold them off! I'll get the goo!

[groans]

[bones cracking] - Uh-oh.

- [grunting]

[screeches]

- We've gotta get out of here!

- What about the web goo?

- We'll get it some other way.

- Well, you little meddle-doos.

It's time for you to find out why you don't crash

Big Mama's box socials!

- Oh, this is all my fault. I got to do something!

Hey! Big Mama! - [snarling]

- [grunting]

[roars]

You dance like you have eight left feet!

- So your feather feet mask a stanktonious traitor?

[tiger growls]

- Guys! I got eight pitchers of goo!

[screams] [glass shatters]

Guys, I've got one pitcher of goo!

Let's go!

- We out! - All right!

- Wait!

Alas, the way he danced,

I thought his shoe must be made of magic.

[sighs]

[somber music]

[cheering]

- Okay! All right, Bullhop, listen.

[exhales] We've been thinking about it and uh--

- Come on, Raph, you can do it.

- [groans] You're welcome to stay with us anytime you want.

- Hey, thanks, guys!

But you know, I was thinking I got to get myself together.

I got to learn how to deal with...

this whole situation.

And I think I found the way.

Through the dance!

Mutant...Canadian...ballet!

- What? - Ha! [grunts]

- Whoo-hoo.

- That sounds great. Good for you.

- You sure you don't want to join the Mad Dogs?

'Cause I was all set to kick Donnie out.

[dart injects]