MATT: And welcome to tonight's episode of Critical
Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-a*s voice actors
sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.
TRAVIS: Dungeons & Dragons!
MATT: Or that. We also do that, I guess.
TALIESIN: That's the same embarrassment that you
feel about us; the way we're feeling about you now.
MATT: What the f*ck was that?!
SAM: Where we play Dungeons & Dragons!
MATT: Oh my god. Welcome. We're already loopy,
what could possibly go wrong? So yes, welcome!
Before we jump into tonight's game, we have some
announcements to get through real fast so hold
tight for just a moment. First and foremost,
continuing tonight's sponsorship with our friends
at D&D Beyond. Our now long-term partner. We're
super excited to be working with them for the
foreseeable future for the time being with the
show. Sam, you have some words, I believe.
SAM: To plug our good friends at D&D Beyond, I
need my fellow castmates to help me. Can we
practice? Can you all say, "Boo"?
ALL: Boo!
SAM: Can you all say, "Yay"?
ALL: Yay!
SAM: Okay, the official digital toolset for
Critical Role is D&D Beyond.
ALL: Yay!
SAM: A great service to organize everything D&D.
Rules, spells, character sheets, and more, all
with a pesky pen and paper?
ALL: Boo!
SAM: No! You can access it digitally on your
computer, mobile, or tablet.
ALL: Yay!
SAM: The cast is using D&D Beyond every week,
except for Taliesin.
ALL: Boo!
SAM: Just kidding, he is!
ALL: Yay!
SAM: I have to use both the boo and the yay or
else it doesn't make sense. He can do cool stuff
like activate Critical Role content in his
character builder and create a blood hunter.
ALL: Yay!
SAM: And do you think they charge an arm and a
leg?
ALL: Boo!
SAM: No, they don't!
ALL: Yay!
SAM: D&D Beyond is offering a discount of $10 off
any digital book in their shop. Use code
"beginnings" at checkout.
ALL: Yay!
ALL: Boo!
SAM: No, is that D-N-D Beyond?
ALL: Yay!
SAM: And this spot was written by Sam Riegel.
ALL: Boo!
(laughter)
MATT: Thank you so much, Sam. And thank you, D&D
Beyond, for being our partners for this new
campaign.
LAURA: Marisha, you yay'ed, good for you!
MARISHA: I did! It was a little complacent, but I
yay'ed. I gave him one.
MATT: Oh man. Talks Machina, of course, our after
talk show about this episode will be on next
Tuesday, as it is every Tuesday, after the show at
7:00pm Pacific here on Twitch and Project Alpha,
with our host Brian W. Foster. (burp) I always
burp when I say his name. I wonder what that says
about him. I don't know why.
LAURA: It's that cabbage smell.
MATT: It's the cabbage. So check that out. Merch,
Laura.
LAURA: So, you know, we talked about those posters
last week. They're still in the store on
pre-order. Some of them are getting shipped out
right now, so you should be getting them soon.
ALL: Yay!
LAURA: We're going to leave them on pre-order
until Monday night, so if you're watching this on
YouTube after it's been aired live, you've got until
midnight to put in that order.
ALL: Yay.
LAURA: Then they're going to be gone. Well, we
might have a small overage that remains in the
store. But the pre-orders will be done. You know
what I mean. And then hey, check out that other
stuff like shirts, hats, and dice. We should be
getting some more Vox Machina d20s. I know a lot
of people have been asking about them. They're
going to be restocked, hopefully within the next week.
More will be coming soon if those sell out. You
know how it goes.
MATT: Great, thank you, Laura. Podcast. Episode
one of this campaign is already up. So those of
you following in podcast form or have friends who
have been waiting to listen to the podcast on
their commute; it is available, the first episode.
Every Thursday morning, we'll have the episode of
the previous week available and we'll be keeping
those up consistently as the campaign progresses,
and we also have the entire story of Vox Machina
currently available on podcast. Makes me happy.
Once again, we are firmly in support of our
longtime charity partners, 826LA. They do awesome
work teaching creative writing classes for
children who normally wouldn't have the
opportunity to get involved. They do phenomenal
work. I recommend that you research them and if
you can, either help with a donation or actually,
you can donate your time as well to help teach and
be part of the program if one is near you. Go
check it out.
MARISHA: We were talking to one of the heads at
826LA over the break, Joel, and he was saying that
they would love to do D&D, but no one on their
staff knows how to DM or do D&D. So if there's an
826 in your area, and you're like, "I know, I'll
start a D&D club," I'm sure they'll be open to it,
just go talk to them and go teach kids D&D!
MATT: Yeah. Run a game for a bunch of cool
teenagers and show them how awesome this game is.
MARISHA: Or cool eight-year-olds who are equally
as amazing.
SAM: Or dorky eight-year-olds or teenagers.
MATT: Those are the same, Sam.
MARISHA: Nerd is chic now.
MATT: I like to think I was always cool. No, it's
not true at all. I'm still trying to get there.
All right, cool! Appearances. Laura and Travis
will be at Emerald City Comic Con in Seattle,
March 2nd to the 4th. If you're up in that area,
go over and say hi to them. I will be at Lexington
Comic and Toy Con in Lexington, Kentucky March 9th
to the 11th. As well as Otafest in Calgary up in
Canada, May 18th to the 20th, and Akon in Texas,
June 7th to the 10th.
SAM: Calgary is like the Kentucky of Canada.
LAURA: Is it?
SAM: I don't know.
MARISHA: I'll take that as a compliment.
LIAM: I am also going to Bak-Anime, not to be
confused with SacAnime, on February 3rd and 4th.
TRAVIS: How do you spell that, B-A-K?
LIAM: B-A-K, that's real soon. So I'll be there.
MATT: Beautiful. And I believe--
LIAM: Wait! Comic book next week. Issue four.
Comic book.
MATT: Issue four on the 24th, I believe it is?
TALIESIN: By far the most fourth of all of these
books. It's easily the most fourth.
TRAVIS: Like the blue hair.
TALIESIN: Thank you, this is new. Just went for
this, it's going to slowly darken over time.
MATT: Into pure shadow.
TALIESIN: It's going to be keyframed and
photoshopped, I'm aware.
MATT: The invitation is there, folks. Screencap and
photoshop away.
TALIESIN: I've already been told that's it's going
to happen.
MATT: On that note, that concludes our
announcements, thank you for your patience. And I
believe it's time for us to begin tonight's
episode of Critical Role.
[80s music]
MATT: And welcome back. Last we left off, our
slowly gathering band of adventurers had begun to
have their stories intertwine in the city of
Trostenwald, on the southern reaches of western
Wynandir on the continent of Wildemount. Here we
had Nott and Caleb who had been traveling
southward coming and meeting, in the center of the
tavern, the Nestled Nook Inn, with Jester,
Beauregard, and Fjord. They were invited to a
nearby carnival that had begun preparing for their
performance later that evening, in which they met
Yasha and Molly. After swapping some stories,
earning and losing some gold, they began to gather
at the outskirts of the Ustaloch, the lake right
on the eastern edge of Trostenwald, for the first
opening performance of the Fletching and Moondrop
Carnival of Curiosities.
TALIESIN: Traveling Carnival of Curiosities.
MATT: Upon entering the tent, they saw a number of
performances. However, during a musical performance
by this young dwarven girl whose voice was this
mysterious, magically enchanting experience, a
member of the audience rose up and began to
transform into a terrible undead creature that
began to lash out, k*lling another member of the
audience, who then began to become one of these
same creatures. You all, grabbing your weapons
from Yasha, who had been keeping them stashed
away, leapt into the fray, slaughtered both of
these terrible beasts, just in time for the
crownsguard to rush in and ask you what the hell
happened. After information had been gathered of
who was immediately available and responsible for
this carnival, Gustav, Bo the Breaker, and Molly
were marked to be arrested. One of the guards was
escorted outside of the tent by Yasha, who was
going to show him where this young dwarven girl
was currently resting, and upon being led astray
to the wrong tent, she just ran into the distant
hills and vanished. And that is where we left off.
SAM: So we're still at the carnival?
MATT: You're still in the tent.
LIAM: With crownsguard?
MATT: With the crownsguard and with Watchmaster
Jossyd. The crownsguard that had left naught but a
moment before comes rushing in, his breath
huffing, sweat dripping from his brow, his eyes
wild. He goes, "Watchmaster! The big woman is
gone! She's gone!" The Watchmaster turns to him
and says, "You three, go with him. Search for
her." They all immediately run out back out the
performer's flap and he turns to the rest of you
in the group, "Shackle and drag those three down
"to the stockade." About five guards approach and
begin to press Gustav, Bo, and Molly to the ground
and begin to put chains and shackles on them.
TALIESIN: I'd like to make a counteroffer?
MATT: He's in mid-speech, "The rest of you keep an
eye on the performers here. Ask around, see what
"you can find. As for the others, don't go far."
LAURA: The innocent patrons, you mean?
MATT: "You may be innocent, in which case you have
nothing to worry about. However, we have an
"investigation to complete, so I would ask that you
stay in the city and wait until you are called in.
"You will be questioned, and when this
investigation is completed, regardless of how long
"it may take, you are not to leave Trostenwald."
LIAM: If I could just contribute one word, the 40
or so people who are outside and the rest of us
will vouch for this one, the colorful one. He
saved many people's lives. Don't take my word for
it. There's everyone outside.
MATT: All the rest of the crownsguard glance to
each other, he goes, "Well, unfortunately, that is
"not for me to decide. The Lawmaster would have to
be appealed to. If you wish to come with us, we
"can bring you along with us to the stockade and
you can speak with her. Then, perhaps, she may
"grant you leniency, but I can give you no
guarantee."
MARISHA: Why don't you just question us right now?
I'm confused on why you don't just do that now.
MATT: "Well, we could do that instead. We'll
have you arrested, put you in the stockade as we
"question the rest of you."
LAURA: No, let's go to the stockade.
TRAVIS: Yeah, we'll all be in one place.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Jails are not my favored terrain. Just
want to point that out. Not this go-around. No.
TRAVIS: Good to know.
LAURA: I would have guessed that about you.
MARISHA: Not really comfortable with that.
MATT: "We're leaving. The rest of you, stay in here.
Watch over the performers. Make sure nobody
"leaves. Come if you wish. Otherwise, we'll be in
touch." The Watchmaster gathers alongside the
other five crownsguard, lifting up the shackles of
the three that had been arrested and begin to drag
them outside of the tent and into the night air.
LIAM: I send Frumpkin to follow.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Can I double back into the performance
area and see if I can find that little girl that
they're looking for? Before they do?
MATT: You may, if you want to. So you send
Frumpkin just to follow them. You guys are staying
behind, then?
TRAVIS: Are there three regular crownsguard that
are going with Molly? Or is the Watchmaster going
with them as well?
MATT: The Watchmaster is going with them, or at
least he's exiting the tent with them. It looks
like there are five crownsguard attending the three
of them that are shackled.
TRAVIS: I'll go out the front exit of the tent
just to see if the Watchmaster goes with Molly.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: I'll follow Fjord.
MATT: Okay, so the two of you are following.
Anybody with them? Currently, it's you two and
Frumpkin.
SAM: Are we going with them or not? Should we stay
here? This is not our affair, right?
LIAM: I don't know. I'm having second thoughts
about being here at all.
SAM: Well, you sent the kitty, didn't you?
LIAM: Yes, and we're not going to leave without
him. Why don't we just--?
SAM: Follow behind a bit?
LIAM: That's right.
SAM: Okay. Sounds good.
MATT: All right, so as you guys exit, keeping
a pace behind, watching the
crownsguard guiding the current prisoners towards
the actual city, Frumpkin keeping a zig-zagging
distance behind and following.
LIAM: DM?
MATT: Yes?
LIAM: Is it possible for me, if Nott is holding my
hand and leading me, to go full third eye and walk
blind and deaf here looking through Frumpkin's
senses?
MATT: I would say yes, but you are purely like--
because all you're doing is walking forward and
you need someone to guide you.
LIAM: Right.
SAM: And he can't communicate to me either so--
LIAM: I can talk, but I can't hear you. I can talk
and hold her hand so she can stop me from
prat-falling all over myself.
SAM: Yes. But you can talk?
MATT: He can talk but he can't hear you.
SAM: Got it. Okay. Great.
LIAM: But we've done this before so you know to
squeeze my hand really hard if I should pipe down.
SAM: Sure.
MATT: All right. So, first off, Beauregard.
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: As you back out of the performer's exit of
the tent into the center of their encampment, the
immediate exit, there are already four crownsguard
currently searching around and setting up a watch
perimeter around the different tents. They're
gathering and making sure none of the other
performers have fled and a lot of them are being
brought out into an area where there's a number of
tents all facing towards a large campfire in the
center. There's a couple of chairs set up there,
it's kind of the common area for the performers of
the carnival and it looks like they're all being
put out there so they can get a bead on it and
make sure they know where everyone else is.
MARISHA: I'm going to try to be aloof, stealth a
little bit. I don't want to make myself completely known.
MATT: Are you trying to stealth out of sight or
just trying to not draw attention?
MARISHA: No, just trying not to draw attention.
MATT: Okay, all right. Go and make a stealth check
just to see if--
SAM: Wait, did we just all ditch Marisha?
LAURA: She just walked out.
MARISHA: I ditched you. That's c*ck. That's
better. 17.
MATT: 17. Okay. As you kind of dart through the
flap of the tent and move behind one of the large
carts that currently is still affixed to a horse
that is currently just chewing on an apple, and
you hear the crunch in its teeth, you glance over
past the edge of the immediate near tent and you
can see this group gathering there and it appears
that no one's immediately aware of your presence.
MARISHA: Do I see the little girl whose name was--
what was her name?
MATT: Toya. You do not see her yet. The guard just
got out there and they're just beginning to pull
people out. You do see the fire dancer brought out
there. You then see the two-- Yeah, Ornna. The
Knot sisters are brought out and pushed out there
and they're all looking very frustrated.
MARISHA: Are people being amicable?
MATT: Yeah, they're not shoving them around,
they're just calling them out to the front so they
know where they are.
MARISHA: Okay. I want to look around. Do I see any
type of movement in the shadows, anyone looking
suspicious?
MATT: Make a perception check.
MARISHA: Ooh yeah! Natural 18. 21.
MATT: 21. Okay, as you glance about, you don't see
anything lurking in the shadows. What you do
notice, though, is one of them bring Toya out of
one of the-- the tent that's on the southern side and
as he brings her out, there's a heavy thud sound,
and you see coming out from behind the tent the
large form of-- you heard the name Kylre once, but
the ''devil toad." The obese lizard man who's
stomping up behind.
LAURA: Is he a dude or is he a creature?
MATT: It looks like a lizard man, so scaled,
humanoid, but extremely thick, bulbous belly,
large, almost frog-like legs--
TRAVIS: Bipedal or on all fours?
MATT: Due to the size of his form, mostly all
fours and lumbering forward on all of them but
sits back on a bipedal situation.
MARISHA: So they're bringing the both of them out?
MATT: The toad is hiding behind the tent and as
soon as Toya comes out, comes up to the guard and
puffs up its chest. The guard spins around and
goes for the blade and pulls it out just carefully.
MARISHA: Am I still next to that horse?
MATT: The horse is currently still up on the cart,
but is about 30 feet from you.
SAM: Beast Shape!
(laughter)
MARISHA: I'm going to take my staff and give a
really nice whack to the horse to get it to run.
MATT: You know what? Let's go ahead and make an
animal handling check on that.
SAM: We never get to make those!
LIAM: First of the show!
MARISHA: Oh my god, I'm so nervous right now.
TRAVIS: You're good, you're good, you're good.
MARISHA: That's not great. 11?
MATT: 11 will do. It wasn't a hard DC, but it was
more knowing where to hit it to where it would
cause it to bolt versus just get angry.
MARISHA: Get pissed, sure, kick me.
MATT: So going for-- not to actually hurt the
creature but just enough to spook it, you hit it
in the right place towards the back of its
hindquarters to cause it to suddenly rear up
(neighs) (cart clattering noise) and go into a
sprint. The cart begins to bounce and smash onto
the ground. You can see the wheels clattering into
the rocks and the stone between the bits of--
MARISHA: I'm going to bolt in the opposite direction and
try and loop around to the south side of the tent.
MATT: Make another stealth check, please.
MARISHA: Big dice, big dice. Okay, 19!
MATT: Okay. You dart around the north side of
these tents and you're pretty sure you weren't
seen. As the cart begins to bolt off behind this
horse, you see all the crownsguard turn. The one
that was currently staring at the devil toad
glances off to the side. As he glances off, the
devil toad takes Toya and just pulls her to him
protectively and the guard puts his sword away.
"Check!" Points to them and then bolts off to go
after the horse. The other three stay, watching
over the group.
MARISHA: Okay, can I loop around, kind of come up
behind them?
MATT: I mean, they're scattered a bit but
there's--
MARISHA: The devil toad and Toya.
MATT: Oh yeah. Make another stealth check. You're
running through open areas each time you're doing this.
MARISHA: Yep. (yells) Did you see that?! It leaned
to a four. Ten.
TRAVIS: That is a b*stard die right there.
MARISHA: That sucked.
TRAVIS: That's a tease.
MARISHA: Laura, put him in the dice jail.
LAURA: I don't have my dice jail out yet. It's
okay, he'll chill there.
MATT: As you come up around the back of the devil
toad, the guard that runs past doesn't immediately
notice you because he's focused on where this cart
is running off and you can see another guard that
was far away from this encampment that's circling
back with him. The two of them are now bolting in
the direction as the cart begins to slow. It's not
just going forward forever but it spooked him and
it's starting to slow down. They're just going to
inspect it. However, as you slink up behind, the
devil toad's head curls back towards you and you
hear this deep, guttural (growls).
MARISHA: "Okay. It's okay. Toya?" And I look at
Toya. "Hey, come on, let's get out of here, let's go."
MATT: At which point a voice says, "Excuse me?!"
And you can see the three guards are there
staring at you.
MARISHA: f*ck. You didn't say there were f*cking
guards.
MATT: I did say there were three guards. The three
guards watching them.
MARISHA: I thought you said they left.
MATT: One of them left.
MARISHA: One of them left. So wait. Oh sh*t.
MATT: It's a bad stealth check, I'm sorry. But
there's now three crownsguard right there and
they're like, "Can I help you?"
TRAVIS: Time to go to jail.
LAURA: Oh, this is so exciting.
SAM: k*ll them all.
MARISHA: Ey! I was actually just looking for the
loo?
MATT: The guard that's closest to you glances to
the other guys and goes, "She was with the group,
"right?" They recognize you, and they look at each
other. "You're going to the stockade, my dear."
MARISHA: No!
MATT: The three guards slowly approach and they
begin to take out chains and manacle you up.
SAM: In an effort not to go to jail, you went to
the jail.
MARISHA: I'm trying to get the girl. I was trying
to free the damn girl.
MATT: I know.
TALIESIN: You'll be fine.
MATT: So you're shackled and begin to be dragged
toward the stockade.
MARISHA: It's just the two guards, right?
MATT: It's the two guards now. As you're being
brought back, you can see more guards are coming
from the city to the carnival. They're keeping it
under surveillance.
MARISHA: So are they taking me away?
MATT: They're taking you to the city, yeah.
MARISHA: What are they doing with Toya? Anything?
Are they leaving them behind?
MATT: They're leaving them behind currently with
the guards that are there. They're not arresting
anybody from the carnival, but they're not letting
them leave. But they're keeping them there.
MARISHA: Okay. I'm going to do a quick--
SAM: k*ll them all.
MARISHA: I'm in shackles?
MATT: You are.
MARISHA: Okay. I'm going to do some monk sh*t
here. I'm going to elbow one of the guards. Right
in the ribs. And take the other one and bash the
other one in the face and then I'm going to turn
to Toya and I'm going to say, "Run! Run! Go! Run!"
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and--
SAM: Make all kinds of rolls.
MATT: First, go ahead and make an athletics check.
MARISHA and SAM: This is a terrible idea.
LAURA: To not drag any attention towards her, you
are completely shoving her into the limelight.
MARISHA: Trying to distract these f*cking
assholes. That is a six. Ten.
MATT: As you go back to elbow, you get halfway
there before your chains go taut. They're both
holding the chain at each side, and you see the
tension of it; you can't even get him from behind.
You imagine in your head; you go over it two or
three times. As you go through the first step--
(grunt) doesn't go anywhere.
TRAVIS: Tried to do the Sherlock Holmes.
MARISHA: Do I at least get the "Run!" out to
Toya?
MATT: No. I'm sorry.
MARISHA: Is she just standing there? Waiting for a
guard?
TRAVIS: She sees you having a seizure in the
chains.
(laughter)
MARISHA: What is she doing? Is she running?
MATT: No. Honestly, the devil toad and her seem
pretty close. He is grabbing her in a protective manner.
MARISHA: No, they can both run. Run for your life!
Fine, whatever. She wants to get arrested at this point.
MATT: Two bad rolls in a row. I know. Level two.
MARISHA: I go join my friends.
MATT: You will shortly. Ahead of her, along the
way, Gustav is just quiet. Bo the Breaker, Bosun,
as you know him by his full name, is grumbling
under his breath and is trying to out-loud piece
together thoughts on what may have what
transpired, saying things like, "I don't know, you
"think it's done on the inside? Or is this somebody
trying to sabotage it?"
TALIESIN: I think maybe it has nothing to do with
us. I think maybe we were just caught in the crossfire.
MATT: It is quite possible.
TALIESIN: Sorry, sir. Trying to keep my mouth
shut.
MATT: One of the guards tugs on both of your
chains and says, "Quiet now! Save it for the
"lawmaster." They bring you in-- you go in through
the Lochward into the Hillsward, which is the
southern portion of Trostenwald. You are brought
to the outside of the stockade, which is a large
single-story, tall, rectangular building of large
stones and masonry. It's built for function. It's
not a very beautiful building, but it's
defensible and it seems fairly well-made. However,
there are the banners of the crownsguard marking
the double-door entrance. As you're brought
within, you can already see there are two central
chairs where two current watch sit, just watching
the front door. Beyond the right, you see, is an
office that you guys are dragged to-- and the rest
of you eventually catch up to the group. You are all
brought inside this darkened office. Inside,
relatively simple. This isn't a library-type study
office. This is very much for function. There's a
couple of small crates that contain materials that
are too far in shadow to see the details of it.
Look to be pieces of paper, probably gathered
evidence or weapons that have been reclaimed.
There is a stone desk on the far end, and there,
within this office, already accompanied by a
messenger dressed for immediate travel, is a tough-looking
dwarven woman in her middle years rapidly
scrawling on parchment. Her black hair is streaked
with silver, tumbling past her red and gray
leather armor. She finishes writing on this
parchment, rolls it up, and hands it to the
messenger who immediately darts out of the room
without a word past you guys, giving you a brief
look as he continues on whatever his business is.
As soon as your eyes pass off the messenger, you
hear a loud slam, and you glance back. She's put
her hands on the table. She glances up, "All
"right, what riff-raff have you brought in to me
this day?" The watchmaster takes the chains of the
three of you and pulls you to the front of the
group and says, "Sorry to be a bother, but we have
"three individuals arrested in connection with, as
you have heard so far, the deaths at the carnival
"performance this evening." She rolls her eyes.
"All right, bring them forward." They go ahead and
pull the chains up. The watchmaster bows his head
and then leaves the room. She steps forward and
goes, "I am Norda. It is my job to keep this city
safe and keep shite like what happened tonight
"from happening. I approved your second time on the
outskirts of our town and you have k*lled two of
"my people. What have you to say about yourselves?"
TALIESIN: Exactly how did we k*ll them, exactly?
MATT: She glances over at you. Glances over at
Gustav, "I have been told by my guard that you
"gave performance, and as part of this performance
you released two beasts into the midst of the
"population."
LAURA: Well, technically, he wasn't part of the
performance, technically he was saving everyone.
Technically.
TALIESIN: Thank you. Yes, you see--
MATT: Gustav interrupts you and says, "I'm so
sorry, my liege. Please, I take full
"responsibility for what happened this evening on
myself. These people around me had nothing to do
"with this. They are not part of the carnival, they
were just merely helping. It is my carnival, and
"whatever judgement there lies, I take upon myself
and my head." At which point Bo the half-orc steps
forward, against his chains and goes, "Gustav,
what are you doing?" He's like, "Shut. Up. Please,
whatever judgement there is, put it upon me," and
he bows his head low. "Is that the case? Is he the
"only one?" She takes a good, hard look at you and
Bo the Breaker.
TALIESIN: Oh, are you waiting for me to speak?
Yes, he's the only one.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
TALIESIN: Natural 20. About f*cking time, you
little sh*t!
MATT: She gives you a look. Looks over at Bo the
Breaker. Shakes her head. "Keep these two
downstairs. This one let go. He seems to be free.
We'll be talking to you very soon." At which
point, the crownsguard drag the chains back and
Gustav gives you a quick look under his eye and
goes-- as they're pulled out of the room, out of
sight. She glances to you, "Well, you're out of
chains! That's great. Doesn't mean you're absolved
of the investigation. So, where are you staying?
You and your compatriots?"
LAURA: Well, technically we just all met,
technically.
MATT: "Well, technically, as far as I'm concerned,
you're all together as part of this
investigation."
LAURA: We're a group you guys!
(laughter)
MATT: "So we're going to have our investigators
come to wherever you're staying, which--," and she
looks down at some papers here, "-- looks to be
the Nestled Nook?"
TRAVIS: That's correct.
MATT: "All right. Don't leave the city. We'll be
in touch."
LAURA: Great, I really like it here so that's good
that we get to stay so long.
MATT: "Do you have something to say?"
TALIESIN: No. Just shocked to see someone die in
front of me not more than--
TRAVIS: I can assure you, we're here to cause no
trouble. We will be as compliant as we possibly
can be.
MATT: "Good. Dismissed!" She claps the edge of the
table. The remaining crownsguard, who's left there
to keep watch, escorts you out off the stockade,
escorts you onto the street.
LAURA: Her accent is really strong! It's hard to
not match her accent!
(laughter)
TALIESIN: It's the one accent that I really have
trouble with.
TRAVIS: Would you call it infectious?
TALIESIN: b*stard.
MATT: Sorry.
TALIESIN: The one that we know is a problem.
LIAM: I'm going to call my cat back to me and I
drop the telepathy and I just start tugging you
back to the Nestled Nook. Come on, we have to talk
about this. We have to decide what we're going to do.
SAM: Right away.
TRAVIS: Excuse me--
LAURA: They're not with us.
TRAVIS: Oh, I thought you were right behind us.
LIAM: My cat was in there, but not I.
MATT: Yeah, but you'd have to stay within 100 feet
to maintain that.
LIAM: Well, we would've walked up to the building,
the cat would've scurried around, if possible. So
I'd like to think that I heard all that, which is
why just I said all the things I did.
MATT: You did hear all that. Okay, and I'd say, as
they're making their way out, you can probably
duck around without them seeing you as they left.
Yeah, you can do that. So, you guys are jettisoned
into the street. It's now probably just past
midnight.
TRAVIS: Mollymauk, I don't mean to pry into your
business, but has this ever happened to you
before?
TALIESIN: This has never-- anything like this has
ever happened before. And thank you. For the
record, I don't owe any of you anything--
TRAVIS: Oh, I don't know about that.
TALIESIN: --I swear, but thank you, and I'm ready
to help with this.
LAURA: Do you think it was the little girl?
TALIESIN: No! That's an act, that's not anything.
It's just a show!
TRAVIS: Right, the large toad that was with the
girl, what's the story there?
TALIESIN: It's nothing special, it's just a guy
making a buck, all right? He's fine!
MATT: You hear the footfalls of guards approach
and the rattle of chains as you see Beauregard--
TALIESIN: By the way, where's the obnoxious one?
The really loud--
MATT: As opposed the rest of you who are gingerly
brought up, you see Beauregard being pulled
forward but now the chains around her are being
pulled taught on two sides. She's being brought
forward like a wild animal almost.
MATT: And she's just being led towards the
stockade.
MARISHA: Help.
LAURA: What happened?
MARISHA: Help. Help help help. Help help. Help
help help.
(laughter)
MARISHA: Help. I'm with you, I'm with you. Help
help.
LAURA: Oh, I thought you didn't like jails.
MARISHA: (clears throat) Help.
TALIESIN: Is this part of the show by the way? I
was just curious.
TRAVIS: Unfortunately, no.
MATT: Which is the last thing you see as she is
yanked into the stockade and out of sight.
TALIESIN: I'm going to be very helpful and not go
in there with the two of you while you try and get
her out.
LAURA: So should we go in and try to get her out?
TRAVIS: Well, yeah!
LAURA: Okay.
TALIESIN: I'll stand guard.
LAURA: We'll follow her in.
TRAVIS: Don't. Leave.
TALIESIN: I have nowhere to go.
MATT: You walk in behind her. You watch her being
pulled to the stairs. She's bypassing the office
of the Lawmaster right now and is being brought to
incarceration before being questioned. They bring
her to the stairs and a torch-lit, subterranean
basement area. As you begin to approach and follow
behind, you can see one of the guards who is
currently on watch. He sees you guys just exit and
then walk back in, following another prisoner. And
stands up and goes, "I'm sorry, where are you
going?"
TRAVIS: It was a busy day for us. Unfortunately,
we're partially responsible for this one as well.
Bad luck.
LAURA: She was also helping to save a lot of
people. Big misunderstanding.
MATT: "Well, see her into her cell and please exit
the vicinity."
TRAVIS: Fair enough.
MATT: "Appreciate that." He follows behind you
guys. They're on high alert and they're a bit
scattered. You get the sense right now that they
have a lot of their initial stock of guards
off-site right now. So they're doing the best they
can to hold on to what they currently have in the
stockade.
TRAVIS: To the side I say to Jester, I say: This
does not really fall in with keeping a low
profile. We talked about this.
LAURA: I know isn't it so weird?
TRAVIS: Yeah, it is.
MATT: You guys follow down to the basement portion
of this. Which there's a heavy locked door
immediately that is opened from the opposite side.
You hear a couple of keys turn and the shifting of
wood against metal before the door opens and
reveals the rest of a long hallway that is flanked
by two rows of cells. Iron bars about maybe two
inches apart going across the entirety of this
long hallway. You can't quite see the end of it
until you step down to where the door frame is.
And there is probably a total of ten cells to each
side. As you walk through, you can see in the off
shadows in the corners a few huddled bodies
hunched or asleep. Keeping to the shadows and out
of the light. The smell of mildewed wet compost
and piss hits your nose like a wall.
LAURA: It smells like Caleb down here.
(laughter)
MATT: You get about five cells in where you can
see the guard that was previously in there just
finish off closing the cell that contains both
Gustav and Bo the Breaker. They move to the cell
just beyond that, open that cell, and then go
ahead and put Beauregard into that one.
TRAVIS: Are they not going to take her to see the
Lawmaker?
LAURA: I know, why doesn't she get to talk to the
Lawmaster?
MATT: As he closes and locks it, "Because she
decided not to come helpfully."
LAURA: What do you mean?
MARISHA: Ah, oh, no you misunderstood. See that
was just, I have this spasm that has this twitch.
It was an injury from, like, a childhood thing.
LAURA: Oh no, are you guys making fun of her
because of her spasm?
MARISHA: Yeah that's actually-- (fake crying) it
was very sensitive for me. I had a really tough
childhood. I was just trying to find a bathroom.
MATT: The three guards walk away, not caring. Who
were there previously and--
SAM: Spasm shaming.
MATT: At this point, a man who is on the far end
of the hall walks up. And you can see him, he's a
man with a heavy, bushy beard that obscures a lot
of a dark leather mantle, over a general cloth
tunic. He has burly arms, heavy torso, super
scrawny legs, a widow's peak, and he looks to be
the jailer. He walks up and puts his hand on the
bars and goes, "Oh well, if you want to be
"patient, I'm sure the Lawmaster will be here
sometime in the morning and you can discuss
"whatever this business is. But if you want to say
goodbye, now's the time."
TRAVIS: Actually, we were just upstairs and it
would really help us if we could, perhaps,
expedite the process. Perhaps there's an
arrangement we could come to if she could see the
Lawmaster now.
MARISHA: Yeah, I'm looking injured, man. I show
him my eight hit points of damage.
TALIESIN: How many kittens is that again?
MATT: That's sixteen kittens. Kittens have half of
a hit point, I don't think kittens have more than
that.
LIAM: That's eight Frumpkins.
TRAVIS: An audience is all we're asking for. No
favors.
MARISHA: Yeah, this is just a wrong time, wrong
place thing.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
SAM: Use it.
TRAVIS: God bless. 16.
MATT: He gives you a look and says, "All right,
but if she gets angry, it's not on me."
TRAVIS: I understand. Thank you for your
understanding.
LAURA: She's a very calm person. I've never seen
her angry, ever.
MATT: He gives a whistle. Another crownsguard
comes up and approaches him and he goes, "I'm
"sorry. Could you go and fetch the Lawmaster? They
are requesting an audience. If she gets angry,
"just add it to this one's sentence." The guard
exits and a brief time by, you can hear the slight
muddled cursing of a dwarven female descending the
stairs. You can see she has an overcoat on, was
halfway out of the stockades finishing up her
evening in her office.
TRAVIS: Beau, remember your little sister.
SAM: Oh, what? Little sister? What?
LIAM: We're not there.
MATT: So, as the Lawmaster approaches, now pulling
the coat over herself, she goes, "Okay, so you've
"returned, apparently, needing to poke into what
business now before I go off and get some food?"
TRAVIS: I do hate to trouble you again, twice in
the same evening. It's incredibly inconvenient.
MATT: "I hate being troubled twice in the same
evening."
TRAVIS: If we may, this sweet girl here was also
part of our party and she is quite the protective
one. I'm afraid that she was also providing aid to
our fellows in that tent. I'm afraid her younger
sister was attacked in a similar way. I feel it's
only prudent to acknowledge that she was trying to
protect this young dwarven girl that performed in
the circus. She means no harm.
LAURA: It was an adopted sister.
MARISHA: I practically raised her. It's a
sensitive subject.
MATT: Okay. I would like a deception check.
TRAVIS: Oh, yeah baby. 24. Natural 18.
MATT: Modified by their answers.
LAURA: I was helping!
TRAVIS: I'm new at this stat! Don't f*ck it up!
MATT: She gives a narrow look through her eyes,
looks to one of the other guards that you can see
standing in the back, a familiar one to you, Beau,
and goes, "Is this true?" He goes, "It appeared to
"us that she was attempting to escape upon us
trying to bring calm to a very tense situation,
"but I'll leave it in your realm, Lawmaster." She
looks back. "So your sister, apparently, is part
"of this scenario as well?"
MARISHA: Adopted sister.
MATT: "Okay. Well, your sister's under
investigation."
MARISHA: Sure.
LAURA: She's staying at the same place that we
are.
TRAVIS: Indeed. And we can be found at any hour.
The Nestled Nook Inn is where we are.
MARISHA: And I'm more than willing to be compliant
with the investigation. In fact, you can see the
injury the beast left on my ribs, so if you want
to test it for any type of specimen samples, feel
free. It's very painful, but I'm willing to do it
for the cause.
LAURA: Do you need me to heal that?
MARISHA (through gritted teeth): No! For the
cause! Do it for the cause!
MATT: At which she looks to you now and goes, "Are
you saying you might have been infected by this
"beast?"
MARISHA: No. It's a separate issue. There was two
things going on. There was, like, the big angry
toad beast and he got a swipe at me. And then
there were people who were getting attacked.
MATT: "Theeds!" And she looks over to the jailer,
who goes, "Aye?" And she goes, "Could you have a
"look at this wound for me real fast? I want to
make sure this isn't something that's going to
"spread."
MARISHA: Yeah! Yeah. Uh-huh.
TRAVIS: A great idea indeed. And thankfully there
was no flesh-to-flesh contact.
MARISHA: Nope.
LAURA: Yeah. The big zombie beast especially was
using a lot of, like, sticks and stuff to attack
people more than any kind of mouth.
(laughter)
MATT: The jailer, Theeds, takes a quick look at
the wound and he goes, "No, it appears to mainly
"be just bludgeoning. I mean, we'll keep a close
eye on her." You can see now the Lawmaster is
rubbing her eyes in frustration and goes, "I just
want to sleep."
TRAVIS: Indeed. It would give us no greater
pleasure than to get out of your hair.
MATT: "Fine. We'll have guards posted at the
outside of the inn. You're not to leave until this
"investigation is complete. It may take days. Until
we find out who's responsible for these deaths and
"bring them to justice, you are not to leave the
tavern."
TRAVIS: Understood.
LAURA: Like, at all during the day, even? Just a
question. If we wanted to shop or something. Not
okay?
MATT: "Not until this is done."
LAURA: Cool.
MATT: "Because otherwise, you're welcome to stay
here, instead."
LAURA: It is really beautiful here, but I think
I'd rather stay at the inn?
TRAVIS: Indeed we would. This is most gracious of
you, Lawmaster Norda.
MATT: "Get them the f*ck out." She turns around
and sighs heavily as she stomps out of the
chamber. The jailer opens the cell door and allows
Beauregard back out, and he looks a bit confused
but amused at the same time. The guards that had
originally arrested you escort you out, not
leaving any element of their sight off of you.
They escort you guys to the actual inn itself, to
the bottom floor of the Nestled Nook Inn, watch
you enter, and then post up right outside the main
entrance to the tavern.
LAURA: You should have spasmed a couple times on
the way here.
MARISHA: Aw, sh*t.
LAURA: Yeah. Opportunity missed.
MARISHA: My little sister? What the what?
LAURA: She's a dwarf! She's human!
TRAVIS: What? No, I was trying to say she had a
little sister that had a similar incident and that
made you try to protect Toya. I was trying to
throw you a bone.
LAURA: Oh. You didn't make that clear at all.
MATT: Are you guys up in your room, or are you in
the tavern?
LIAM: Yeah. We're having a talk.
TRAVIS: We're under watch.
MARISHA: I was just trying to go with what you
said.
TRAVIS: Yeah. You did all right.
MARISHA: All right. I mean, it kind of worked. But
you're not entirely wrong! I was trying to go get
the stupid little girl, who seemed to be stupid.
TRAVIS: Did you see anything?
MARISHA: I tried to save her. I was like, get the
hint, what's going on?
LAURA: Why would you save her? She turned those
people into zombies.
MARISHA: (stammers)
TRAVIS: We don't know that.
LAURA: I mean, she could have.
TALIESIN: She didn't.
LAURA: Oh, hi! You're here.
MARISHA: Yeah, if anything, we should be looking
at this guy. Why are we putting our neck out for
you?
TALIESIN: You're putting your neck out for Toya
for some strange reason and I don't know why,
she's perfectly capable of handling herself.
TRAVIS: Have you been to this town before?
TALIESIN: Not that I can remember. They all look
the same after a while.
MATT: You've come through once, but that was a
while back and you weren't really paying
attention.
TALIESIN: Busy, yeah.
TRAVIS: And you've never seen conditions like this
affect any other carnival goer before?
TALIESIN: Nothing like this. Hundreds, possibly
thousands of shows. Yeah, thousands of shows.
Nothing. Never. It's not us.
LAURA: So great! We're stuck in a city that has
zombie issues, that's all.
TRAVIS: Where are the other two?
TALIESIN: Which other two?
TRAVIS: The stinky one and the little one.
TALIESIN: Oh, your friends!
TRAVIS: Yeah. Can we look around and see if we
spot Caleb and--
TALIESIN: You call them Stinky and the little one?
All right.
MATT: You spot around the interior of the tavern.
They don't appear to be nearby.
TRAVIS: I wonder if they came back.
LAURA: I'll go up and ask the tavern keeper.
MATT: Okay. Yorda?
LAURA: Yeah, Yorda.
MATT: "Oh, hi! Everything all right? You had a few
bruiser types leading you in here, some of the
"crownsguard, huh?"
LAURA: Oh my gosh, there was this big trouble at
the carnival, did you go?
MATT: "I heard about that. I didn't go in there,
but people are coming in here saying--"
LAURA: Somebody turned into a zombie and then--
MATT: "I heard that! That's incredible!"
LAURA: Yeah! And then we're all under
investigation because we saved them! These guards
are weird. Hey, did you see the wizard guy, the
stinky guy and the little halfling?
MATT: "Yeah, they came in not but a few minutes
before you did. They went upstairs."
LAURA: Oh, great! They're here!
TRAVIS: They are?
LAURA: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Good.
MATT: Meanwhile, the two of you are upstairs in
your own chambers.
LIAM: During all of that, I would have dragged you
back here, brought you upstairs. And I whip off my
ratty coat, throw it on the bed and sit down on
the ground so that I'm eye level with you, Nott.
SAM: Hi.
LIAM: Nott, you and I have to make some decisions
right now, okay?
SAM: Now?
LIAM: Yes.
SAM: Why?
LIAM: Well, I know why we said we were coming
here.
SAM: Get some booze, got some books, find a little
taste of civilization, maybe some better food.
LIAM: Yeah. I didn't say, I also had the idea--
you know, you and I meeting and teaming up has
been a good thing.
SAM: Oh, yes, very good. I know everyone else
makes fun of your smell, but I don't smell
nothing.
LIAM: That's what I like about you. I have been
thinking, and yesterday just furthers that
thinking, that I don't think you and I are enough.
I had the idea that we would come here maybe and
find others that we could tag along with, or meet
up the way you and I did. But now I think that is
a terrible idea! The people we spent the day with
are lunatics. I don't think that we can do this.
I've changed my mind entirely, and I think we
should go, but we can't now because we are stuck
here for the moment.
SAM: Under sort of holding arrest or something? We
can't leave the city.
LIAM: No.
SAM: But I was thinking about this. The people we
met down there and spent the day with: they are
lunatics, but they draw a lot of attention to
themselves, leaving us free to sort of slink back
into the shadows a little bit. It might be sort of
the perfect camouflage. No one's going to be
looking for a little goblin girl anymore, because
they'll be looking at the crazy people, the
tieflings running around smashing sh*t.
LIAM: You know, I had not thought of it quite in
that way and that is a good point, but I am not
convinced. I'm not convinced. And perhaps we're
better off-- maybe I was too ambitious.
SAM: Well, let's give it a day and if things seem
a little bit, you know, skinky-doodie tomorrow, we
can fritter away in the middle of the day or
something.
LIAM: All right. Well, we'll wait and see. While
we're here, one thing, okay? No Money Pot. No Rat
Food. None of those plays. I have silver, we don't
need it right now.
SAM: But we need to replenish the healing potion
you used. If we don't have that, then what happens
the next you get in trouble?
LIAM: We're sealed here, and they are watching.
We're with a couple of tieflings, a little person
in a doll mask, and a dirty ginger. We've got
people staring at us every second of the day. We
need to dial it back a little bit.
SAM: All right, but how on earth are we-- all
right. We can cool it with the cons for a couple
of days. But I can't promise that I won't get the
itch again.
LIAM: You just talk to me. You hold Frumpkin. Just
keep your hands full with Frumpkin, okay? Hold my
cat, okay?
SAM: All right.
LIAM: And then this is going to blow over because
we didn't do anything! We did something good.
SAM: No! I didn't do nothing, we just went to a
show.
LIAM: That's right.
SAM: It was a pretty good show. Up until, you
know, the dead people part.
LIAM: But it was a good show, wasn't it?
SAM: Yeah! Well, we'll lay low. Should we pretend
that we're still friends with these people?
LIAM: I was going to suggest the same thing. In
fact, I think we should go downstairs. They're
going to be coming back. We don't want to cause a
stir with them, either. We just want to leave if
that's what we're going to do.
SAM: Don't worry! I'll turn on the charm.
TALIESIN: Thank God.
LIAM: Okay. Let's get a drink.
SAM: Thank gods.
LIAM: We head downstairs.
MATT: You guys head down. You get to the bottom of
the stairs just in time to see Jester, Beauregard,
Molly, and Fjord looking across the tavern, making
their way in your direction, and you guys notice
them meeting you in the tavern room, as well.
SAM: Oh, thank God you're here and safe! We missed
you! Somehow we got separated! Friends.
LAURA: That happens, yes.
MARISHA: Can I insight check him?
MATT: Sure.
SAM and MATT: Her.
MARISHA: Her. Sam. Natural 20.
SAM: I'm lying!
(laughter)
MARISHA: Front butt?! You just saw that, too?!
(laughter)
MARISHA: You guys peaced out pretty quickly.
LIAM: We did, I did not come to Trostenwald to go
to jail.
TRAVIS: What did you come to Trostenwald for?
LIAM: We are tired. We've been traveling a long
time. We've been saving. Wanted to take it easy
for a few days.
TRAVIS: Sure, I'm not trying to pry. I was just
curious where you were going.
MARISHA: Just curious why you have a mask.
TALIESIN: If I'm going to listening to somebody's
life story I'm going to need a drink. You,
gorgeous, what's your name?
MATT: You look over and see a woman with darker
hair, the general barmaid. "Adelaine."
TALIESIN: Adelaine, I would like a round for all
these terrible people and one for myself. What's
the difference between these three beers? I've
honestly got to admit, they all taste the same to
me.
MATT: "Go with the von Brandt."
TALIESIN: Let's get a round of von Brandt for
everybody.
TARVIS: Actually, if it's all the same I'm not
really an ale fan. Do you have any fire whiskey?
MATT: "We can get you some liquor, aye."
LAURA: Can I have some milk?
SAM: Two, please.
MATT: "All right." She walks away.
LAURA: You think she heard that I wanted milk?
TALIESIN: I don't know. I'm going to ask for one
of each of these beers because I want to have a
tasting competition. I'm not going to be drinking
alone.
LIAM: I wander away from these two with their
questions and I sit down with Molly.
LAURA: Caleb, you want to see something cool?
LIAM: I would love to see something cool.
LAURA: I show Caleb where I etched the d*ck in the
table a couple nights ago.
MARISHA: Yeah! Bringing it back.
LIAM: That's pretty good.
TALIESIN: How'd you etch a deck in the table?
LAURA: It's a d*ck.
TALIESIN: Oh.
LIAM: Have you always been an artist?
LAURA: I have actually, I've been an artist since
I was little.
TALIESIN: You think that's what they look like?
LAURA: I've seen a lot of dicks. That is what most
of them look like.
TALIESIN: I'm already in my cups.
LAURA: What?
LIAM: So where do you two come from?
LAURA: Us two?
LIAM: Yes, you two with the horns.
LAURA: Well, I don't know where he comes from. You
think we all come from the same place? That was
really inconsiderate.
LIAM: No, you are very different it's very clear.
LAURA: He's purple.
TALIESIN: She's blue.
LAURA: Which is pretty rare.
LIAM: He's every color.
TALIESIN: It's very true.
LAURA: I'm from Nicodranas.
LIAM: Remember when we started the first campaign
and all those places came in a split second and
all that history. I'm from Shrev`nam Chicago. Oh
yes.
TALIESIN: I'm from the circus.
LIAM: So you're a traveler then?
TALIESIN: Oh yeah. Quite a while.
LIAM: Since childhood?
TALIESIN: Long as I can reasonably remember at the
very least. It's been a while. It's nice. I like
it. They're good people. Work hard.
LIAM: You have a lot of scars.
TALIESIN: That's a very funny story, actually.
TRAVIS: I like funny stories.
TALIESIN: Me too.
TRAVIS: You did some crazy sh*t with that sword of
yours.
TALIESIN: Thank you. These swords-- you buy a
drink and we'll see.
TRAVIS: You polish off that one already?
LAURA: Wow, that's a lot-- okay.
TRAVIS: Can we get another round? For the--
TALIESIN: How much I owe you for the first round?
MATT: They are keeping a tally of the table.
LIAM: Frumpkin scrabbles up onto Nott's shoulder.
SAM: Hi Frumpy, nice to see you again.
TALIESIN: Mother always told me to never give a
story away for free.
TRAVIS: Wise words.
LAURA: My mother said don't give away other things
for free.
TALIESIN: I already like your mother.
MARISHA: My mother always said nothing in life is
free.
TALIESIN: I can tell.
MARISHA: None of this absolves the dodgy goblin
who slinked past that first question. Where are
you from? What are you traveling from? Why the
mask?
TRAVIS: Only because we seem to find ourselves in
quite the predicament.
SAM: We're just a couple of friends, strolling
around the countryside looking for adventure.
MARISHA: Sure you are.
LIAM: Do you see many goblins walking around
cities here?
MARISHA: It has nothing to do with that. People
who move from place to place frequently tend to
have other stories as to why they're doing it.
LIAM: Well, let me make it clear: goblins are not
typically welcome in any cities, that is why the
mask.
MARISHA: Well, you're going back to the goblin
thing. I'm more curious about the travel thing.
SAM: We have a string of bad luck. We tend to get
in trouble in places for various reasons. Some of
which is my fault. Most of which is my fault. I
have sticky fingers. I can't help myself
sometimes. I'm fascinated by little bobbles and
fancy pieces of jewelries and I love trinkets so
much! I just have to take them, and have them
with me, and put them in my pockets. It's gotten
us in a few scrapes a couple times. Caleb, he is
fantastic. Very patient with me, understands. But
really it's my fault; it's not him. He's a smart
man, a brilliant magician! Have you seen? Some of
his tricks are phenomenal, really.
TRAVIS: No, I'd love to.
SAM: I feel bad to because we never stay in one
place long enough for him to have a decent shower.
(laughter)
TRAVIS: It's a moving story.
MARISHA: I immediately check my pockets after that
to see is Nott has lifted anything. Is everything
still there, all my coin?
MATT: Make an investigation check.
TALIESIN: I'm going to join you on this one.
MARISHA: Not great. Not great at all. Six.
TALIESIN: 16.
MATT: 16? Everything seems to be in order for
you.
MARISHA: Wait that was a 15! Right? That was the
dice I rolled? 16.
MATT: Everything seems to be in order.
MARISHA: Okay.
SAM: Anyway, that's the long and short of it.
LAURA: What do you do with the things once you
steal them?
SAM: Well the nice ones I keep. I have a little--
LAURA: Do you have a collection?
SAM: I collect a lot of things, but in the last
place we hunkered down, it was all taken from me.
We were in one of those prisons before-- Am I
sharing too much? I'm sharing too much, aren't I?
We were in a prison, they took all of our
belongings. I lost all of my collections. I had a
lovely rock collection. I had a rare coin
collection. I had a stick collection. Yeah, it's
all gone now.
LAURA: What about shiny things, though?
SAM: I love them. I just don't have any right
now.
LAURA: Because I think if you have sticky fingers
for sticks and rocks, I don't think that will get
you in trouble.
SAM: True. But they were like people's canes and
things.
(laughter)
SAM: I mean I call them sticks because I don't
need them. But I suppose they really needed them.
LAURA: Yeah, that makes sense.
TALIESIN: There's only one way to find out.
MARISHA: Wait, I'm sorry. I think I need
clarification. If sticks mean things like valuable
canes, what do rocks mean to you?
SAM: You know those rocks that humans wear on
their fingers and around their necks and stuff.
They're really nice rocks.
LIAM: We don't have many of those at the moment.
TRAVIS: Would it be fair to say that the more
someone desires something, the more you're
interest increases?
SAM: Oh I don't care about the people who have
them. I just like pretty things. Toys, anything
really.
LAURA: I'll keep an eye out for things that you
would like.
SAM: Okay! Can you help with that?
LAURA: I can if you want me to. Or I can point it
out.
MARISHA: Is it the joy of taking the things or do
you just like gifts?
SAM: No, it's the collecting.
LIAM: It's like a nervous tick a little bit.
TRAVIS: Are you good at it? Do you get caught very
often?
SAM: Well, would you like a demonstration?
LAURA: Yes!
TRAVIS: Now, Jester, if I may, we are already in a
little bit of a pickle.
LAURA: Steal something from me! Do you want me to
close my eyes?
SAM: Sure! That'll make it really easy. Are they
closed?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: All right. Out of practice here. I'm going to
do a shot. Crack my knuckles.
LAURA: Just don't take the thing on my waist,
because he'll be pissed.
SAM: He'll be pissed? What?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: He?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: What's on your waist?
TALIESIN: I'm looking at her waist. What's on her
waist?
MATT: What's on your waist?
LAURA: My symbol to the Traveler.
SAM: Oh. All right, I'll go to her left buttcheek
pocket and fish around.
LAURA: I'm in a dress. I don't have a pocket on my
buttcheek. But you can try.
SAM: What pockets do you have?
LAURA: I would have pockets on the front of my
dress, and maybe a little pouch on my hip.
SAM: I'll do the hip pocket.
MATT: All right, make a sleight of hand check.
SAM: Three.
(laughter)
MATT: You close your eyes and feel a tug and a
shake--
SAM: Plus eight.
MATT: What's your passive perception?
TALIESIN: I'm going to guess ten.
LAURA: No, it's 13.
MATT: So, yeah, you totally feel--
LAURA: You're doing great!
SAM: This is not how it usually works! The person
is not really expecting it. This is embarrassing,
really. I have the one skill and I failed at it.
LAURA: It's okay, you can keep practicing.
LIAM: There is that one magic trick that you're
able to do. Would you like to show them the magic
trick that you can do? I pull out a small red clay
ceramic bowl. Then I pull out a copper piece.
Here, you know the trick, right?
SAM: Yes, I know the trick. Takes a little bit of
time, doesn't it?
LIAM: You're good.
SAM: Okay. (clears throat) I do know one piece of
magic. Feast your eyes--
TRAVIS: I take one step back.
on the sacred money pot of school.
If you place a copper piece into this pot
and say the magic words--
what's the magic word again?
LIAM: Fibulous.
SAM: Fibulous! It will turn into a silver piece.
LAURA: Should I say it?
TALIESIN: I want to hear you say it, anyway.
SAM: Only I can say it.
(laughter)
SAM: For everyone has their own magic word, and it
won't work with you.
(vocalizing, trills)
By the ancient order of the school, fibulous!
LIAM: That is a silver coin right there.
LAURA: Oh my gosh. Wait a minute. Does this mean
the silver I won from you was actually copper?
SAM: No, it only works up.
LAURA: Great! Thanks for the silver.
SAM: Well, no, we weren't giving you the silver
piece just showing you a bit of magic. This pot is
actually quite powerful. It can do that once a
day, so if you'd like to purchase it.
LAURA: Can you turn this into a gold piece?
SAM: Well, it only works once a day.
LAURA: Well, tomorrow can you make it gold?
SAM: I think it only does the copper to silver?
LIAM: The magic is not that strong.
SAM: Yes, it's a mild magic pot. But if you'd like
to purchase it from us, we can sell it to you for
five gold.
LAURA: Five gold for one silver a day? That
doesn't add up.
TRAVIS: By the end of the week you made your money
back.
LAURA: No.
SAM: At discount for friends, three gold.
LAURA: Three gold.
SAM: And for that, we'll teach you your own magic
word.
LAURA: That's pretty good.
TALIESIN: That's 40 days.
LAURA: 40 days?
SAM: You can do it once a day forever, you have it
for the rest of your life.
LAURA: Yeah, but I have lots of money. I don't
need it.
SAM: But this is free money, that you don't have
to work for.
LIAM: Also, you know, they basically helped us out
today. You can do it for one, for them.
SAM: All right, one gold.
LAURA: One gold. That's a really good deal. Did
you hear how much he gave me a deal? Okay!
MATT: Do you give him the gold?
LAURA: Yes, I'll give him the gold. Hold on, let
me make sure I have it. Where's my--?
TALIESIN: It's the second button.
LAURA: Oh, currency! Gold. Okay, one down.
MARISHA: Do I notice anything shifty about that,
while we were looking at his hands?
MATT: Perception check.
LAURA: What's my magic word?
LIAM: It can be whatever you want it to be. You
have to agree upon it and you have to focus on
that word for one full day while you are in
possession of the pot.
MARISHA: 21.
MATT: You watch that copper piece become silver,
magically.
LAURA: How about skinky doodie?
LIAM: Skinky doodie, that is unique. I'm sure no
one else has possession of that arcane power word.
I could consider it yours if you focused on it all
day tomorrow. But you really have to focus.
LAURA: Okay, I will. Super a lot of focus. Skinky
doodie. Thank you for this.
SAM: It's a pleasure doing business with you. Does
that answer your question? I've got some for you.
MARISHA: You have questions for me?
SAM: Yeah! How does someone like you -- you're
human right?
MARISHA: Yeah, I am.
SAM: How do you come by learning Halfling?
MARISHA: My parents were in the winery business.
The wine making business. And halflings really
like wine.
SAM: Everyone likes wine!
MARISHA: That's true.
TRAVIS: Some people more than others.
MARISHA: Some halflings just deal in wine a lot,
and a lot did in the town that I'm from and then
my parents wanted me to keep up with the books and
all that stuff so it forced me to learn halfling.
I was around it a lot.
SAM: What town was that then?
LAURA: It's close by here, right?
MARISHA: It's a bit aways. It's Kamordah.
SAM: Hmm, haven't heard of it.
MARISHA: It's a small farming town, it's no big
deal. It's whatever.
SAM: Nothing shady there!
MARISHA: Nope, just a wandering traveler just like
the rest of y'all.
TRAVIS: Well I mean I was really impressed with
the little trick, I sure would like to see a big
trick.
LAURA: I use Thaumaturgy to open all the windows!
MATT: Being about one o'clock in the morning at
this time, and the energy in the tavern has come
to a quiet crawl, those who are keeping their cups
are either snoring or in the process of preparing
to go to sleep, you watch as Adelaine, the
barmaid is walking around cleaning up tables and
suddenly all the windows in the room slam open
with a heavy impact and there's a burst of wind
that comes through. The two crownsguard that were
outside flanking the opening doorway suddenly rush
and look in and look about at the lot of you.
TALIESIN: Sorry! Drinking! I did order two extra.
Two extra?
MATT: They both just slowly curl back to their
perimeter.
TALIESIN: You're no fun.
MARISHA: Yeah, circus! Woo, circus coming to
town!
TRAVIS: Jester, I meant a trick from Caleb.
LAURA: Oh.
LIAM: You want to see a trick?
TRAVIS: I would love one.
LIAM: I am well into my second trost at this
point. I can show you a trick. Young lady, if you
would assist me please. Step up onto the table.
SAM: Absolutely!
MARISHA: Just don't break anything.
LIAM: Adjust your minds. I begin to weave one hand
in a slow circle around the other, and a globe of
golden light poofs out.
SAM: I put my hands and feet out in an akimbo
pose.
LIAM: A second little globule of light comes out.
SAM: I feel it coming! Hit me!
LIAM: Then two more at the same time come out of
my hand. Then they amass upon my little companion
and form a similar sized little humanoid of light
that then coincides with my little friend. She is
glowing golden on a table in the middle of the
Nestled Nook.
SAM: (sings)
LIAM: The Goblight, ladies and gentlemen. The
Goblight!
SAM: Thank you!
MATT: There's some claps in the back rooms. You
see one of the drunken gentlemen has come to
semi-consciousness and goes, "That's impressive!"
(hic)
Then passes back out on the table.
TRAVIS: How did you learn to do that?
LIAM: I could always do that a little bit, as a
kid. I was always good with magic. I had a knack
for it. That one's easy.
TRAVIS: That's impressive.
LIAM: Well, thank you.
MARISHA: Aw buddy.
LAURA: Maybe he can teach you how to do that.
TRAVIS: Is it something that can be taught to
others?
TALIESIN: Are you trying to learn magic? Is that a
thing?
TRAVIS: Well, I'm just a little curious about
how people use their magic.
MARISHA: I've seen you have a few tricks up your
sleeve. You seem like you're not totally magic inept.
TRAVIS: No, it's relatively new for me though, so
I'm just trying to learn.
LIAM: Are you reading a lot?
TRAVIS: No, I wonder if maybe I should be?
LIAM: Well, it could be helpful. Although, I'm a
bit of an amateur teacher. I taught Nott the one
trick you saw, but other things. We've been
working together, I suppose I could try to help
you.
MARISHA: Have you had your abilities your whole
life, like a kid?
TRAVIS: No. Again, fairly recently.
MARISHA: Something happen?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LIAM: Oh, I'm sorry, do you two not know each
other super well? You seem like you do.
MARISHA: We got a good 24-48 hours on the rest of
you.
TRAVIS: Yeah, we're not super deep.
MARISHA: Nope.
SAM: Where did you come from then?
TRAVIS: Well I came up from the town of Port
Damali.
LAURA: That's where we met!
TRAVIS: Yeah, I met Jester a while back and after I
Ieft town, coming up to the northeast, I ran
across her. I'd seen her do some of her magic
before. That's what I'm trying to learn about.
LAURA: If you need anymore displays, you just let
me know.
LIAM: We've seen that window thing a couple times.
It's good.
MARISHA: Can I request a display? I think I have a
broken rib. It might be getting more purple.
LAURA: Oh yeah, I mean I can ask, but I think I'm
tapped.
MARISHA: I'll sleep it off, it's fine.
LAURA: Yeah. I can try! I'll put my hand out. I'll
try to cast Cure Wounds. I got sh*t. I got
nothing. It's not happening.
SAM: It's past midnight!
LAURA: Oh, no. I've got to sleep.
MATT: You concentrate for a moment. Make a
medicine check.
LAURA: Okay!
SAM: Natural 12!
LAURA: That's 17.
MATT: 17. You focus on the bruised area, exposed
out of her monk robes. You watch as the slight
bruising suddenly turns like a sickly green.
SAM: Is that good?
MATT: In a very unhealthy way.
LAURA: You know what? I think this might be worse
than just like a bruised rib. Can I poke it? Does
it seem infected?
MARISHA: Does it hurt?
LAURA: I'm not going to poke it with my finger,
though, I'm going to poke at it with a fork.
MARISHA: Don't poke at me with a fork!
MATT: Right now, she's inspecting it. You take a
fork off the table and poke.
MARISHA: No, you don't!
LAURA: I'll use the blunt end, don't be such a
baby!
MATT: She pushes it in and the bruise hurts a bit.
You watch as this sickly pus liquid begins to pour
out, with a thick viscosity and a lot of it. You
all of the sudden feel like you've punctured a
balloon that's beginning to erupt and you feel
awful. Then you blink a few times and it's just a
bruise. You hear this distant (cackling).
LAURA: Oh, m*therf*cker, he's such a d*ck!
SAM: What? Who? What? What's going on?
MARISHA: My bruise is in the shape of a d*ck?
LAURA: That would be really cool.
MARISHA: That would be fun!
LAURA: I'm just going make sure, I'm going to push
on it a bit more. I think it's okay, you're fine.
MARISHA: All right. I'll sleep it off.
LAURA: I think I need some sleep, you guys.
LIAM: Gustav, the person who runs the circus, is
he your friend?
TALIESIN: He's family.
LIAM: He's family?
TALIESIN: We take care of each other. He's a good
man.
LIAM: So what's your play tomorrow?
TALIESIN: Well, they have all my things and they
have all my family. I'm going to figure out what is
going on. Try and find out what's actually doing
this. I assume since it's none of us, it's going
to happen again.
LAURA: But how can we because we can't leave this
tavern?
TALIESIN: Well, I--
SAM: Were Caleb and I not instructed not to leave
the tavern? We received no formal instruction.
MATT: No, you weren't part of that formal
instruction. The rest of you were told not to
leave the tavern until further notice.
TALIESIN: I'm sure if we sleep on it, we'll think
of something.
LAURA: Fjord! You and I could leave in the morning
the same way we got in.
TRAVIS: That's true.
SAM: How'd you get in?
LAURA: With magic. I would show you now, but I'm
out of spells!
SAM: The fork trick wasn't very fun, was it?
LAURA: No. I was making sure she wasn't a zombie.
I thought she might be.
TALIESIN: That's fair.
LAURA: She got clawed, right?
TALIESIN: A bit, yeah.
LAURA: All right. Hey b*tches, I'm going to go to
bed.
TALIESIN: Where exactly am I going to be sleeping,
by the way? I can sleep down here, but it might be nice--
TRAVIS: Molly, if you would like to share my room,
you can.
TALIESIN: Excellent. You don't mind? I'm going to
pull the swords off finally and start getting
comfortable out of the performance clothes.
MARISHA: I'm in Jester's room, still, I think.
Sleeping on the floor on my bedroll.
LAURA: As she starts to go to sleep, I want to
draw in my sketchbook and tell the Traveler all
about the cool things I saw for the day. I'm going
to draw the red faced guard as I pretended I was a
zombie, and I'm going to draw Molly's horns all
full of jewels and stuff! I'm going to draw the
stack of books.
SAM: The monster attack?
LAURA: And I'm going to draw like a zombie, but
like as an old man but as he's biting his dentures
fall out and he's not no teeth!
MATT: All righty. Fairly decent sketches,
actually. You eventually find yourself to sleep.
The rest of you, go to your respective rooms and
find yourselves falling into a night's rest. As
evening comes to a close and the morning brings
you to consciousness, you are rested. You are
healed up, your spells are restored.
SAM: I can use the Long Rest feature of D&D
Beyond!
MARISHA: You hit a button!
LAURA: And all my spells back!
TALIESIN: There is a button for it.
SAM: Whoa, nothing changed! No spells. I lost ten
hit points?! What the f*ck?! I've done something
terribly wrong.
(laughter)
TRAVIS: D&D Beyond's watching going, "f*ck you,
Nott!"
LAURA: Wait no, you're putting temporary hit
points on! What are you doing?
SAM: We'll work on this during the break.
LIAM: Self destruct in 10, nine.
MARISHA: He just throws the iPad.
MATT: Coming to consciousness in your respective
rooms, cold morning air. It's a bit frosty. The
windows to each of your rooms have a bit of that
curled bit of frost on the outskirts of the glass.
It's probably 8:00 or 9:00 in the morning at this
point in time and the day is yours. What do you
wish to do?
MARISHA: As I wake up, I sit up and I go: Jester?
LAURA: Hmm?
MARISHA: Were you laughing to yourself last night?
I just kept hearing giggling. It was obnoxious.
LAURA: I'm sorry.
MARISHA: Uh-huh. I just get ready.
MATT: As a note, too, for all the drinks you guys
drank last night, that probably put you back about
one and a half gold.
TRAVIS: Molly, that's your tab, right?
TALIESIN: All but the one you bought me.
TRAVIS: Yeah, except for that one.
TALIESIN: To be fair, I didn't give you that
story.
TRAVIS: That's true.
TALIESIN: I very carefully start unfolding my robe
and it has my swords very carefully laid out in
there from the closet. I do a little prayer and
put everything back on.
TRAVIS: Are you praying over your swords?
TALIESIN: I am, of course.
TRAVIS: Is that part of your thing?
TALIESIN: You seem honest.
TRAVIS: I try to be.
TALIESIN: Well, the swords are magic. According to
my mum, they go back in our family generations to
a very unusual rare line of tiefling that came
from a demon of ice that lived inside a volcano.
Our family, and I take this with a grain of salt,
were royal guards, were entrusted with these magic
swords and these swords can only be activated by
the blood of the royal family. So in honor of any
fighting I ever do with them, I make sure my blood
is at least drawn once.
TRAVIS: That's quite the story. Can I insight
check him?
MATT: Yes, you may.
TRAVIS: 15.
TALIESIN: What am I fighting against?
MATT: This would be deception.
TALIESIN: That would be deception. All right. I'm
lying like a m*therf*cker.
TRAVIS: Well thank you for sharing that
honest story with me. It means a lot.
TALIESIN: I walk downstairs.
MATT: All right.
LAURA: Can I go knock on Fjord's door?
MATT: Sure.
LAURA: Ey oh ey, good morning!
SAM: She's a morning person too? Jesus.
TRAVIS: Ey oh ey yourself.
(laughter)
LAURA: Hey, do you want to get out of here?
TRAVIS: Yeah, we said we were going to do that,
didn't we? What did you have in mind?
LAURA: Well, we sneak out and then we go find out
why there are zombies.
TRAVIS: That's a detailed plan.
LAURA: Yes.
TRAVIS: I like it. Are we taking anybody with us?
LAURA: Well, if they can make themselves not look
like themselves, then sure.
TRAVIS: Fair enough. Do you want to ask any of
them?
LAURA: Hey, Beau.
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: Do you have anything you can do to make
yourself not look like you?
MARISHA: I take my robes and I flip them inside
out and I take some dirt and dirty it up a little
bit and take my hair down and I steal
a scarf off of Jester's stuff and I do a
bandana around my head.
LAURA: No, you look like you with a bandana around
your head.
TRAVIS: Yeah that's not going to cut it, not quite
like what we had in mind.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: What are you guys doing? You guys
leaving? Are you guys f*cking leaving? You're not
leaving without me are you?
LAURA: No, of course, we're coming back.
MARISHA: You're skipping town.
LAURA: No. Oh, but we could.
TRAVIS: She's right here.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: I could skip town with you, though. Do
you want to skip town?
LAURA: We'll be back.
TRAVIS: Let's see if Caleb and his little friend
are downstairs first. He has tricks after all.
LAURA: Right.
MATT: Okay, the two of you come to consciousness.
What are you up to?
SAM: Get some breakfast, I guess?
LIAM: Yeah, we're already down there.
MATT: You've already gone down there?
TALIESIN: I've already gone. I'm having breakfast.
I'm leaving a note with the barkeep for Yasha if
she comes back.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: I guess I go down and have breakfast as
well.
MATT: As you guys wander down you find Caleb and
Nott already at a table and Mollymauk returning
from the bar after delivering that note.
TRAVIS: Y'all are downstairs?
SAM: (messy eating noises)
LAURA: Can I try to pick a piece of bacon off your
plate?
SAM: (growls) Sure, for you.
LAURA: Thanks.
TRAVIS: It's like a little dog. The little back
foot creeps up. (growls) If we could we're-- did
you just f*cking? sh*t. We were thinking of maybe
finding our way outside of the inn for a bit. I
don't want to presume anything, but do you have
the ability to change the way you look?
LIAM: To change the way I look?
TRAVIS: Yeah. You know
LIAM: To leave the inn?
TRAVIS: Yeah, assume a different form.
LIAM: Why would I do that to leave the inn?
LAURA: So we can find out why there are zombies.
LIAM: Why wouldn't I just walk out of the inn?
LAURA: Well, because we were told we can't leave
the inn.
SAM: We weren't told that.
TRAVIS: Right.
LAURA: Huh. Well, that's convenient.
SAM: But I can change my appearance.
LAURA: Wow. I would never know it was you.
SAM: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Molly, what about you?
TALIESIN: Well, I mean look at me. I go into my
bag. I do have a disguise kit. Don't I? I think I
do. It's so weird to just have things now. Yeah, I
have a disguise kit.
TRAVIS: Fair enough.
SAM: What does that mean?
MATT: It means he can use to try and disguise
himself. Hide features.
TALIESIN: It'd be a little tricky for me. I
look like what I'm going to look like.
But the rest of you could do a little work.
TRAVIS: Beau, I don't want to leave you behind,
but I--
LAURA: It's true. I have a disguise kit, too. I
could help you out.
MARISHA: Would you do my makeup for me?
LAURA: I'm really good at makeup.
MARISHA: Are you?
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Let's do that.
LAURA: I'm really sh*t at makeup.
(laughter)
TALIESIN: We could just shower this one that would
be enough.
LAURA: He can leave, apparently.
LIAM: Yeah, we could. But not town, we were told
to stay in town.
LAURA: No, no, we're going to stay in town.
SAM: What are we doing again?
LAURA: We have to find out why there are zombies
so we that don't get arrested for being zombies.
SAM: So we solve the case to clear our own name.
LIAM: Why shouldn't we just wait for it all to
blow over? We didn't do anything.
TALIESIN: I tend to find these things don't blow over
necessarily as more they just eventually decide
someone's guilty and take their revenge on them.
LIAM: Do you find yourself in situations like this
often?
TALIESIN: Not this particular one, but yes.
MARISHA: I mean, look at him. No offense or
anything.
TALIESIN: None taken, really. A little taken, but
that's fine.
TRAVIS: He makes a point. I think that the sooner
we find the cause of this, the sooner we can get
out of here.
TALIESIN: She's right, immediately the two of us
are going to get hit with this.
SAM: If we solve the case we would be absolved.
It's not a terrible plan.
MARISHA: And you're so concerned with your goblin
friend. I mean he's in the same boat as the
tieflings.
LIAM: That's a girl.
LAURA: I know it's hard to tell.
MARISHA: I said your goblin friend.
LAURA and LAURA: You said he.
MARISHA: Whatever.
SAM: Listen, we've all had a rough night. I know
that my features aren't necessarily the most
feminine. Among goblin kind, I understand. It's
hard to tell.
LAURA: I can tell.
LIAM: Everybody can tell.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: I'm working on it.
TRAVIS: Let's get out of here. Can I walk back
into a privy, washroom area?
MATT: Yeah, upstairs at the very end of the hall
is the communal washroom.
TRAVIS: Can I use my Mask of Many Faces to cast
Disguise Self on myself?
MATT: Sure, what form so you want to take?
TRAVIS: Older, white-haired, with a beard. Just
very simple peasant's clothes. Maybe a bit of a
farmer or a land worker.
MATT: Okay, easily enough. Basic browns and tans
and general farm worker's tunic and supplies.
TRAVIS: Smudges, dirt on the fingernails.
MATT: Yeah, easy enough.
LAURA: I'm going to help Beau. You know what I'm
going to do for you? I'm going to use my disguise
kit I'm going to give you a beard.
MARISHA: Oh, yeah!
LAURA: Yeah and I'm going to turn you into a dude,
that's a good disguise, right?
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA. Yeah, and a mustache. And a hat.
MARISHA: Love it.
SAM: You really have to sell it though, and act
like a dude.
MARISHA: (low, gravelly voice) I think I can do that.
SAM: Oh yes!
MARISHA: I'm going to go a step further and tape
down my boobs, bandage them down all the way, you
know wrap them. Stuff my crotch a little bit.
MATT: All right. Go ahead and make a dexterity
check.
TALIESIN: Do you want assistance with this?
LAURA: Was he helping me?
MATT: If you want to.
LAURA: Sure.
MATT: So take it with advantage.
TALIESIN: Oh, with advantage.
LAURA: Good. Okay, with the advantage. Dexterity.
15.
MATT: 15, okay. You actually manage to sell a
decent disguise.
MARISHA: Do I have some five o'clock shadow?
MATT: At a distance, at like three or four feet
would be passable and walking quickly by. Upon
close inspection, you could see through it.
LIAM: Is it like one of those old kids toys where
you use the magnet to pull the little filings up?
MATT: More or less.
MARISHA: Mr. Woolly?
MATT: A medieval version of that.
LIAM: Herr Woolly.
MATT: But impressive. Using the kit and using
whatever scraps of clothing you can find and amass
you manage to get a relatively top-knot Silverlake
hobo version of Beau functionally ready to go.
LAURA: It's good, it's good.
MARISHA: Wait Fjord how do you sound? Say words,
you're manly.
TRAVIS and MARISHA: Manly words. Mirror image. I
got nuts.
(laughter)
LAURA: And I'll cast Disguise Self on myself, as
well, and turn myself into a human with blonde
hair and she's going to be very clean-looking.
SAM: Angelina.
LAURA: Yes! With big lips, and a couple jewels on
her fingers.
MATT: Okay. Just double-checking here, Disguise
Self lasts for, is it an hour? Yeah, I thought it
was an hour. So while they're doing that, are you
using your disguise kit on yourself?
TALIESIN: I assume I've just got some very basic
black robe that just--
MATT: Yeah, with a cloak and hood and make-up, you
can probably pass for human as long as you keep
the hood up, and keep most of your more
ostentatious garb hidden.
TALIESIN: I'm sure I've got a set.
MATT: Go ahead and make a dexterity check for your
disguise kit.
LAURA: Do you want help?
TALIESIN: Yes please, this is a lot of work. It's
a natural 20, that'll do it.
MATT: All right. Between making your skin tone
more of a natural tan, peach humanoid color, bring
the hood up. You actually pull some of your hair
forward and adhere it a bit around the horns so
that it looks almost like a cluster of hair in the
front. You manage to tuck in and tie your robe
behind you, your usual clothing, and then using an
over-robe to hide most of the material, and you
look like a dude passing through. So with that
your disguises are complete, your spells are cast.
MARISHA: Is that your human face?
LIAM: While they're doing all that, I want to
stroll outside and see if there's crownsguard
outside, or what. I'm just going to get a breath
of fresh air and see what's on the street outside
of this place.
MATT: Okay. As you exit, there are two gentlemen
in full crownsguard gear. One is standing outside,
the other is currently sitting in a chair, and as
soon as you walk past, they both scan you up and
down, continue to watch you pass by.
LIAM: Good. There's only just the two at the
door?
MATT: Just the two that you can see at the front,
yes.
LIAM: Okay, all right. So I just take a minute or
two. I go back inside. And-- on Nott's shoulder
and say we're good, yeah, I think we're good.
SAM: Excellent.
LAURA: Should we try to do this, then?
TRAVIS: In twos, or singles.
LAURA: Yeah, of course, not all at the same time,
that's obvious.
TRAVIS: Level two, trying to get out of a f*cking
inn.
MARISHA: It's so hard.
TALIESIN: Now I'm kicking myself.
MARISHA: So anxiety-inducing.
TALIESIN: No, never mind, I didn't do it at the
time, I can't do it now. No retconning, never
mind.
LIAM: I'm going to squat down over with you,
privately. I still think that this is a bad idea,
but I can tell that you want to.
SAM: Well it's just that-- listen, there's no
offense, I enjoy our talks and your schooling and
everything, but I haven't talked this openly and
freely with other people in months. It's amazing.
LIAM: It really is pretty nice, isn't it?
SAM: Yes!
LIAM: Still, if this goes south, we leave.
SAM: We're the first ones out the door.
LIAM: Easily.
SAM: Yeah. They'll never know who we were.
LIAM: Caleb and Nott.
SAM: Well, don't say that too much. I mean, yes,
they do know that we're Caleb and Nott, yes.
LIAM: All right.
SAM: Okay.
LIAM: So we're doing this?
SAM: Yeah, let's just go with, and see where it
leads.
LAURA: Can I walk up to Nott?
SAM: Hi! Yes, we weren't talking!
LAURA: (high-pitched) Do you like my outfit?
SAM: Oh! What are you? I'm sorry, I'm just a young
girl from the village.
LAURA: And I'm just a young girl from town.
SAM: I don't know anything. I should go get my
father.
TRAVIS: (high-pitched) New York is where I'd
rather stay!
(laughter)
LAURA: Nott, it's me! It's Jester!
SAM: But you look like--
LAURA: I know! This is how good I am at magic!
Check me out. Are we leaving here or not?
SAM: Are you afraid you'll be propositioned on the
street?
LAURA: I am really attractive right now.
SAM: Those lips are very big.
LAURA: I came over here to give you the blessing!
SAM: What is that? What does that do?
LAURA: It helps you with your stealthing!
SAM: Oh, the stealthy thing, yes, thank you so
much, I'll accept it.
LAURA: You're welcome. Okay, that's it. But I'll
see you outside at some point, okay? Don't be
scared, come up to me.
SAM and LAURA: Okay.
MATT: Okay, in what order are you leaving?
TRAVIS: Should I go first?
LAURA: Sure!
MARISHA: Are we going out in pairs? Like you said?
(Deeper) Are we going out in pairs?
TALIESIN: Has Adelaine noticed any of this?
MATT: I imagine you guys have been using your
disguise kits in your own rooms and chambers.
Other than that, no one immediately seems to be
noticing. Make a perception check.
TRAVIS: Not command ops in the tavern hall.
TALIESIN: Let's call that a--
LAURA: 14!
TALIESIN: 14, thank you.
MATT: You do see Yorda, the barkeep, in the
process of wiping out some glasses at the end,
she's occasionally giving a glance over to you
guys as you're walking around.
LAURA: (whispering) You go first!
TRAVIS: You want to come with?
MARISHA: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Don't do anything stupid. Mouth shut, eyes
forward. Show me how you walk. Maybe a little
less. That's nice. I also assume a little limp,
slight.
MATT: I'll say for the purpose of this, each of
you make a performance check.
LAURA: Oh, god.
TRAVIS: 20.
MARISHA: 16.
MATT: Okay. The both of you exit out, holding your
breath. Out of your peripheral you can see the
deep reds and golds of the crownsguard armor
flanking you as you breach the outer porch of the
tavern, stepping down into the dust to the main
street. You curve to the left and see nor hear any
reaction from either of them.
TRAVIS: Just keep moving to the other side of the
street.
TALIESIN: I go single just a little bit after, and
I rolled a natural 20.
SAM: Is that three for the night?
TALIESIN: Yep.
SAM: Oh my god.
TRAVIS: What color is that die?
TALIESIN: It seems to be iron, like my will.
MATT: It may not have been the snitch after all,
you as*h*le.
TALIESIN: Me and my magic swords.
MATT: Apparently. All right, you saunter by
without an issue. By saunter, I mean you stumble
through. You hear a cough at one point, and it
causes you a moment, but you just continue on
without notice.
LAURA: Oh, everybody's leaving and I didn't have a
partner!
MARISHA: It's fine, don't worry about it.
SAM: You can come with us, if you like.
LAURA: But I feel like you guys are noticeable and
why would I be this really beautiful woman leaving
with the stinky guy?
SAM: It's quickly becoming canon that you just
have sh*t smeared all over you. You could travel
with me! I could be your daughter.
LAURA: You're my daughter!
SAM: Yes! We're a couple, and he's our guard or
something, I don't know.
LAURA: Yeah! You leave after us Caleb, okay?
LIAM: Isn't it simpler for you to walk on yourself
like a beautiful woman?
LAURA: No, me and Nott are going to go together.
Okay, come on, Nott!
SAM: I'm sorry, she's very forward.
LAURA: Come on sweetie, let's go.
SAM: Yes, mommy!
LAURA: And we walk out.
MATT: You guys don't have to make a performance
check because you've exited before, and you're
completely visually a different individual, so you
guys pass through without an issue. Caleb, you can
follow up behind, as you are not currently under
direct guard in the tavern. They do notice you
exit, and they're aware of your presence, but you
are not confined to the tavern. So you guys all
manage to slowly come together a few blocks down
and out of the sight of the crownsguard guarding
the Nestled Nook Inn, and where are you off to?
LAURA: We did it! Where should we go?
TRAVIS: Let's just keep walking for now.
LAURA: Okay. Should we walk toward the carnival
where the zombies were?
TALIESIN: Who was he, would be my question.
LAURA: Oh, right. We should find out where he's
from. How do we do that? Should we ask around and
say hey, anybody know where the old guy came from
that turned into a zombie?
TRAVIS: That's a good point.
TALIESIN: Seems to be the most appropriate thing
to ask at this point.
LIAM: Well, we could find some public places and
just gossip a bit, see if anybody has heard of
him, if a friend has died at the circus last
night.
MARISHA: I mean, you mentioned no sick people. If
he was sick, sometimes that word gets around.
TRAVIS: Maybe there is a morgue, maybe they
recognized him.
TALIESIN: These small towns, most everyone knows
everybody else.
LAURA: Let's go to, is there a market area?
MATT: They don't have a large bazaar, but there is
an area that is generally where a lot of the
simple wares and vegetables and meats and people
who sell small things that they craft their own
at, it's a small market. If you want to make an
investigation check.
LAURA: 16.
MATT: Okay, by going around asking questions and
inquiring and trying to prod people to talk about
what transpired the night before, the information
you gather involves the man who passed away. His
name is Enon Brinjay.
LIAM: Grimjay?
MATT: Brinjay. He's a standard human being in his
early 80s. He's old, but healthy, it seemed.
TRAVIS: Was he in good health?
MATT: Seemed to be in good health for his age.
LIAM: So our w*r against the old continues.
MATT: Apparently.
TALIESIN: We're the Logan's Run of D&D.
MATT: He seemed to have been retired for quite
some time, but had been making little bits here
and there, helping the fishermen move fish to and
from the outside of the lake. He wasn't really
well known. The reason people are talking about
him now is because the word is gotten around and
gossiped about, but for the most part, he was one
of the many faceless people that live in the town.
A handful knew his name.
TALIESIN: Retired fisherman?
MARISHA: He was helping.
TALIESIN: Do we know where he was retired from and
where he was staying, maybe where he was drinking?
He had to go somewhere.
MATT: Actually, he was known often to be drinking
at The Old Mud Hole Tavern.
TALIESIN: Is that with the weird "e" spelling?
MATT: No, just "old."
TALIESIN: I'm always a fan.
MATT: I know.
LAURA: "Ye olde."
TALIESIN: "Ye olde" It's pronounced "the" when you
see the ye.
TRAVIS: I should point out this is the second
connection to the Ustaloch.
TALIESIN: The what?
TRAVIS: Well, before we met up with you two, we
fought off a wicked, sick water snake.
LAURA: It came up out of the lake for some
reason.
TALIESIN: Is this a metaphor or is this actually a
real thing?
LAURA: It really happened. I almost died.
MARISHA: I punched a snake to death.
LAURA: She did.
SAM: There were the snakes in the circus last
night, but it wasn't related to the attack, I
suppose.
LAURA: A little different.
LIAM: How long of a snake are we talking about?
MARISHA: Oh, it was a giant water snake, then the
little girls were complaining about more and more
instances of these snakes coming out of the lake.
SAM: And this fellow who died worked with the
fishermen in the lake?
LAURA: Well, he took some jobs with them. Did
anybody see him the day of the carnival? Was he
working with anyone that day?
MATT: You don't find any of that information. That
would be an intense investigation. You would have
to go beyond asking questions around a market.
SAM: Is the lake within the city limits?
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: It's technically considered part of the
city. It might not be an issue.
LAURA: Where's Ye Olde Mud Hole Tavern at?
MATT: The Mud Hole Tavern, you've been to before.
TALIESIN: I was doing my rounds.
MATT: Yeah, when you first entered the city, so
you can--
MARISHA: The Lochward, is that what we're talking
about?
MATT: The Lochward is where the Old Mud Hole would
be at. The Lochward is to the eastern side of the
entire city. The Lochward is the central one.
LIAM: The wards border the lake.
MATT: So you make your way to the Old Mud Hole.
Entering inside, this is a dark dive of a bar,
you've been there once before. It smells heavily
of old, wet wood, ale stains, and peanut. It's a
very small area and of the four tables that are
there, they are mostly empty, except for one old
man who is sitting there in the process of playing
a game of solitaire with his cards and a man in
his 30s thumbing through a book, who would be the
barkeep if there were more patrons at the moment.
He's flipping through and glances up and gives you
a look as you enter. "Can I help you? Are you
"looking for drinks? Can I get you anything?"
LIAM: Yeah, I would really love a drink and I sit
down next to him. What do you have? I need
something heavier than a trost. I've had enough
trosts to last me a lifetime.
MATT: "We have liquor."
LIAM: I will take your liquor.
MATT: "I will get some whiskey for you then.
Whiskey, everyone?"
MARISHA: Sure.
SAM: Two please.
LAURA: It's okay. She's my daughter. She loves
whiskey. I don't even remember what voice I was doing.
(laughing)
MATT: Make a deception check.
LAURA: I let her have any whiskey she wants. Oh,
that's pretty good. 17.
TALIESIN: We've been doing a pub crawl.
MATT: He goes and lines up a few small containers,
fills whiskey for all of you. "All right, that
"will be eight silver for the batch."
LIAM: I have that. I pull out eight silver. Oh
wait, silver, did you say? I do not have eight
silver.
LAURA: It's okay. I have it.
LIAM: You do?
LAURA: Sure.
(high-pitched voice) I mean, sure.
MATT: He takes the silver and puts it away, slides
the drinks to the rest of you and goes back to his
book and starts thumbing through again.
LIAM: Honestly, it's been a terrible 24 hours. We
were at the circus last night and I did not know
him well, but old man Brinjay fell.
MATT: He looks up and goes, "Enon, it's sad to see
him go and many of us were wondering what day it
"was going to be."
LIAM: Did you know him?
MATT: "He came in here most every day to drink.
He's a lonely man."
LIAM: It was a terrible way to go. I'm sorry.
MATT: "Doesn't bother me one way or the other.
Just sad to lose a patron."
LAURA: Do you know who was talking to him the day
of the carnival?
MATT: "I don't recall. Sometimes he would tell
stories to whoever was willing to listen and not
"most were willing to listen."
LAURA: Was he here that day?
MATT: "Yesterday?"
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: "I think he came in briefly for a drink
before the carnival, but that was it."
MARISHA: You know, we should drink to old stories
of Brinjay.
TRAVIS: (shushes)
TALIESIN: I down my shot. What did the man drink
out of curiosity? What was his final drink? I'm a
bit of a macabre person myself.
MATT: "It's this very whiskey you just had."
TALIESIN: I'll take one more, and I'll get one of
my own.
LIAM: I heard he was sick, too.
MATT: "I don't believe he was ill. I hope not. He
seemed to be rather wasting away. You shouldn't be
doing so much manual labor at that age."
SAM: What labor was he doing?
MATT: "He carries stuff around from small tasks
to--
SAM: Down at the docks?
MATT: "The docks, up at the North Ward. He carried
crates, boxes. Just odd jobs, ways to get by 'til
"the end of his days, which now that they've come,
may he rest and not have to do odd jobs ever
"again." He pours his own bit of whiskey.
ALL: Cheers.
LAURA: Do you know who he was doing odd jobs for
that day?
SAM: Your lady voice is worse than mine.
MATT: "To be honest, if he did, I wasn't paying
attention."
LIAM: I'm sure his family will miss him very
much.
MATT: "There's nobody nearby. He had a son about
35 years ago, but he got married and went up
"north."
TRAVIS: Did he work for any of the particular
breweries around?
MATT: "I don't know. Maybe."
MARISHA: Brinjay.
LAURA: Where did he sit in here?
MATT: He points over to the not the table the guy
is playing solitaire on, but the empty table to
the right of him. "Usually right there in the
corner."
LAURA: I go sit in the corner. I'm going to look
for anything I can find that looks like an old man was
touching it.
MATT: Okay, make an investigation check.
LAURA: Okay. I'm really good at these. 12.
MATT: 12. It looks like probably old person
touching has been all over here. Yes. The table is
very old and warped in places, stains all over it.
It's not a very good table. It's seen some rough
days.
TRAVIS: If we were to go down to the docks and ask
after a few people he worked with, is there anyone
you know that we should speak to, familiar of
his?
MATT: "I apologize. I served him drinks and
pretended to listen to him many times, but I
"wasn't really paying attention."
TRAVIS: I understand that.
MARISHA: Is there anyone who did? That wasn't
hypothetical.
MATT: "Maybe. I apologize. I spend most of my days
reading." He lifts the book.
MARISHA: What's the book?
SAM: You read!
LIAM: Subtle, guys.
TALIESIN: We got a reader. While they're doing
this, I'm going to saunter over to the card
player.
LIAM: Can I see what's on the spine of that book
from where I am?
MATT: At a glance at it, it's in Zemnian, which
you can read. The translation would come about to
The Rosed Embrace.
MARISHA: A romance novel.
MATT: Probably.
LAURA: Is Fabio on the cover?
LIAM: How's your trashy novel? Is it a good one? No
judgement.
MATT: "It's not trashy. It's very tasteful."
LIAM: Oh no, I'm fluent in Zemnian. I've read all
of his works.
MATT: "Have you?"
LIAM: Mutual fan.
MATT: "I didn't realize there was another Samuel
fan in here. Which is your favorite?"
LIAM: I love the Farthing's Embrace.
MATT: "I haven't read that one."
LIAM: It's an early one. He actually did it under
a pseudonym. He did a whole series under that
pseudonym, short stories.
MATT: "What is it again?" He goes over and grabs a
piece of chalk in the back and starts, "It was--?"
LIAM: Farthing's Embrace.
MATT: "Mein Gott, I did not know about this. I may
have to send out Zadash and see if we can find
"some of those books. Thank you."
LIAM: You're a big reader or just Samuel?
MATT: "Just recently Samuel. I read on occasion.
It depends on what you can find."
LIAM: I read a lot, but all I've been able to find
in this town is that parchment place.
MATT: "The parchment place is good for trash. If
you're looking for unique stuff, there's a few
"places you can go."
LIAM: Here in town?
MATT: "Here in town, yeah. If you're having a hard
time finding a specific book, I would recommend
"going to Burnished Bibelots."
LIAM: Burnished Bibelots. Which ward is that in?
MATT: "That is in the North Ward, just on the
outskirts of the main market street. It's a bit of
"a cluttered mess, but Oglen would be happy to help
you.
LIAM: Oglen?
MATT: "Oglen."
LIAM: That is good to know. Thank you.
MATT: "Not to worry."
LIAM: Those are hard to find, the Farthing's
Embrace.
MATT: "I imagine so. It can't be that bad."
LIAM: He wasn't as proud of them. Early work and
all that.
MATT: "Of course. I have a contact in Rexxentrum.
If I cannot find it in Zadash, I will get it from Rexxentrum."
LIAM: That would be the place.
MATT: "What's your name?"
LIAM: My name is Caleb.
MATT: "Caleb. Pleasure to meet you. I am Vosna."
TRAVIS: Thank you for the drink, Vosna. I'll be
taking my leave now.
MATT: "Of course. If anybody else is a reader as
well, come by and talk sometime."
TALIESIN: Not there at all.
LIAM: This has been quite a day.
LAURA: Is there pictures?
(in high-pitched voice) Is there pictures?
MATT: "Pictures are up in here."
LAURA: Oh. Sounds exciting.
LIAM: I sneak my undrunk whiskey to Nott.
SAM: I take out my flask from my leg, unscrew it,
and pour it in.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: What do you guys think? Should we stay
here? Should we go somewhere else?
TRAVIS: We got to get Molly.
TALIESIN: I just sat down for a moment with this
solitaire player.
MATT: Correct.
TALIESIN: They say that solitaire is the game for
the death-obsessed. There's inevitability to every
hand, most of them are doomed from the start no
matter what you do. Any interest to buck fate and
try your hand at an opponent for once? No money,
just friendly.
I slide the rest of my whiskey over.
MATT: "Are you a devil?"
TALIESIN: I've been called worse.
MATT: "I don't play with devils."
TALIESIN: I'm just a man who saw another man die
yesterday. It's been heavy on my conscience and I
was just wondering if there was anything you could
tell me about Enon.
MATT: "Enon wanted to go to that bloody circus."
TALIESIN: I'm regretting it myself.
MATT: "I told him not to go. Stupid, it is for the
common folk and the young. He's always had his
"head in the clouds."
TALIESIN: Has he? That's not what other people
have said.
MATT: "Other people are stupid."
TALIESIN: Why do you think he went? Why do you
think that happened to him?
MATT: "He's lonely. Don't trust the carnival.
Nothing but spooks and magicians and things that
"want to take your life and take your money, take
your family, whisk you away. f*ck the circus."
TALIESIN: f*ck the circus. So that's what you
think happened to him, then? I feel like there's
something evil afoot.
MATT: "Says the devil."
TALIESIN: Again, I've been called worse. Sure you
have in your time, as well.
MATT: He takes the drink, sips it. "Don't come
'round here no more."
TALIESIN: I take my cup back. Down it. I love
small towns.
MARISHA: Shithead.
TRAVIS: We head outside. Well, that was
revealing.
SAM: Was it?
MARISHA: We learned a few things, actually. He's a
prime target. Perfect victim, perfect candidate.
No one really paid attention to him, he was old,
he had no family, his son's gone.
TALIESIN: Awfully convenient.
MARISHA: Awfully convenient. Still awfully
convenient that your little circus doesn't allow
the elderly, which you never fully explained, and
he happened to be one of the oldest people in that
circus. Where did that rule come from?
The sick makes sense, I asked you that
before, but why elderly?
TALIESIN: That rule's been around for as long as I
can remember because it makes people think the
show's dangerous. Gives them a thrill.
TRAVIS: You're worried about them having a heart
attack or something?
TALIESIN: We're not really worried about people
having a heart attack; we want people to be
worried about having a heart attack, because then
they're more excited to come see the show. This is
how these shows work.
MARISHA: Do you know who implemented that rule?
TALIESIN: Before my time.
LAURA: In his defense, every carnival I've gone to
has said no sick people, no old people.
TALIESIN: It's a boilerplate.
MARISHA: Still a good candidate.
TALIESIN: If you were trying to hide doing
something to someone it's a great candidate. If I
was trying to get away with something, terrible
idea.
MARISHA: Or if you were trying to frame someone.
Seems to be a lot of pretty bigoted people in this
town who don't like tieflings and other strange
lots. Jester, you actually said one of the
smartest things of the night, which is-- you did,
yeah. Which is, guard's really weird.
LAURA: Right?
MARISHA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Wait, what?
LAURA: The guards are really weird.
MARISHA: The Crownsguards. As you were saying, the
Ustaloch?
TALIESIN: What kind of weird?
LAURA: Like, you know, they-- What kind of weird?
(laughter)
MARISHA: They seem to be the one connecting
through-line. Also, what's her name, Norda?
Mentioned that she didn't want to let you lot in,
but made an exception. I don't know, if I wanted
to do something, and if I already knew a bunch of
people were upset and angry at a circus and
strange people coming in, it's easy framing, in my
opinion.
TRAVIS: She makes a valid point, actually.
LAURA. Oh. If people are scared of carnivals, they
won't want them in the future.
TRAVIS: Bingo.
MARISHA: That, or if you're up to no good and you
don't want to get caught, blame it on the easy
frame. The weirdos who just rolled into town.
LAURA: Great, so we just need to investigate the
guards.
TRAVIS: That might be harder to do. Maybe we go
down to the Lochward.
TALIESIN: Start at the docks, but I'll keep that
in mind.
MARISHA: I don't know, it might not be the
guards. There might be another through-line
that we're missing.
LAURA: Do we need to question the guards?
SAM: That sounds terrible.
LAURA: Maybe we should tell them they can't leave
town.
MARISHA: Ooh, that's a good idea, yeah! Maybe when
they question us--
LAURA: We turn it around!
MARISHA and LAURA: Yeah!
MARISHA: I like that.
TALIESIN: I was about-- nope, nevermind.
LAURA: What?
TALIESIN: I was about to be very impressed, but I
take it back.
MARISHA: Aw.
TRAVIS: How far is it from where we are to the
Lochward?
MATT: You guys are technically in the Lochward.
It's a quick jaunt over to the edge of the Ustaloch.
MARISHA: So the Ustaloch is the docks? It's what
they called the ward, or it's the lake?
MATT: It's the giant lake that the docks are up
against. The city is built against this giant,
kidney bean-shaped lake.
MARISHA: What does "usta" mean? What does "usta"
come from?
MATT: Do you speak Zemnian?
MARISHA: You speak Zemnian.
LIAM: I do speak Zemnian.
TALIESIN: What does "usta" mean?
LIAM: It means--
MATT: Do you know?
LIAM: Do I know?
MATT: I just wanted to f*ck with you.
LIAM: It's been a while, but osten means lake. No,
it's not Lake Lake.
MATT: Essentially, it just means "an east lake."
LIAM and MARISHA: East Lake.
TALIESIN: Very good.
MATT: Not too complicated.
MARISHA: All right.
TALIESIN: I'd like to avoid the guards for as long
as possible.
MARISHA: Agreed.
TRAVIS: Let's head down to the docks. Keeping an
eye out for crownsguard.
MATT: As you guys make your way towards the
Ustaloch and the Dockward there, we'll go and take
a break. We'll be back in a few minutes. We'll
continue to unveil this mystery.
SAM: This is exciting. Gripping.
MATT: Indeed. I suppose. Little low level mystery
here. We'll see where this goes. All right guys,
back here in a few minutes. We're going to take a
quick restroom break, pick it up from here. We
have video at the break for this week's contest,
so if you're watching on Twitch, feel free to go
ahead and pay attention to get the password and
enter this contest, and we'll have the victor at
the end of the break. We'll be back here in a few
minutes, and we'll see you then.
[break]
MATT: Welcome back, everyone. Before we dive in,
real fast, we do have a winner from the chat.
Thanks, Sam. Congratulations to AvilynRain,
AvilynRain in the Twitch chat! You won the awesome
Wyrmwood prize package. Danoba will be in contact
with you to get your contact information and get
that sent out to you. Congratulations.
MARISHA: I love how we just went through every
rain song in about 30 seconds.
MATT: Yeah we did! Most of them. As you guys make
your way across the streets of the Lochward, you
find yourself to the docks, which are about five
or six main dock structures that protrude anywhere
from ten to 30 or so feet into the loch itself.
There are no major ships. The biggest river that
exits the loch heads towards the mountains, so
there is no direct path to the inlet. All the
boats in here are small fishermen's boats; they're
designed specifically for the lake, for freshwater
fishing and whatever needs to be transferred from
bank to bank. As you approach, you can see a good
amount of the boats are still out on the water.
You can look out and see the outline of them
against the horizon. You see a couple of small
landmasses in the center of the loch, that are
barely out of view. You approach, and the first
couple of fishermen that walk past you both look
to be hardened in their years. Their skin is very
battered by the sun, it's wrinkled and dark from
constant beating of the sky upon them. They glance
over at this unique-looking troupe as they
approach. They stop and don't say anything, they
just look at you like "What are you doing here?"
LAURA: Do we still have Disguise Self up?
MATT: You have it for maybe ten more minutes.
MARISHA: Oh sh*t.
TRAVIS: Do we see any King's Guard? Crownsguard?
MATT: Crownsguard? Make a perception check.
LAURA: 11.
TRAVIS: 11, same.
MATT: Glancing about, you don't see any
crownsguard in the immediate vicinity of the
Lochward. You've seen them, they patrol the town
and walk through, ward to ward, but you don't see
any at the moment, no.
LAURA: Looks like we're ahead of them in the
investigation.
MARISHA: Hey, Jester. Do you happen to remember
the name of that guy whose daughter we saved from
the snake?
LAURA: Oh sh*t.
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: Let's see if I wrote it down in my
sketchbook.
MARISHA: Yeah, because I didn't write it down.
LAURA: King Bertrand?
TRAVIS: No.
LAURA: Okay. What about-- no, I know that guy.
Nope, I didn't.
MARISHA: Damn it.
MATT: You remember where he lives, mostly, because
you were there.
MARISHA: That's true.
LAURA: We could go by there.
MARISHA: We could go by. He seems to like us.
LAURA: He worked out there, right?
MARISHA and LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: You guys make your way along the edge of the
loch to the outside of the fisherman's house. The
house is currently being repaired. You can see in
the main doorway, the door is off the hinges, and
there's a large pile of ruined furniture and
cabinets that have been shifted out of the
building. You can also see a long serpentine
body that is currently being skinned by a younger
man, probably 14 or 15. He's in the process of
carving the skin off of it. This thing is about 20
to 25 feet long.
MARISHA: That's the snake I punched.
LIAM: That's your work? That's impressive. You
took it all by yourself?
MARISHA: Well, no. They helped me. I'm not an
egomaniac. They f*cking helped me.
LIAM: But I saw your g*ns last night. You probably
took the lead.
MARISHA: Give credit to the whole damn group, move
on.
TRAVIS: Flattery got you nowhere.
TALIESIN: I'm comparing the snake to the snake
that's tattooed on my hand to try and get the
heads to be the exact same size.
LIAM: We have been in the woods for too long. I've
forgotten how to talk to people.
SAM: Your game is really suffering.
MARISHA: Thanks for the damn compliment.
MATT: As you approach, the young man with this
large, sharpened knife-- it looks like it may have
been a heavy butchering knife that he's using to
fillet and pull the skin off the snake. Looks back
at you guys and doesn't know what's going on. You
hear a voice go, "Hey!" You look up and you see
the fisherman that you saw before, the one who
came to you guys in the tavern. He's up on top of
the roof, and he's currently boarding some
portions of it. It looks like a part of the roof
had been damaged in the fray. He goes, "Hold on,"
gets up, and comes down the ladder on the side and
approaches. You can see he's sweating. "I'm so
sorry, I didn't know you were coming. What can I
"do for you?"
MARISHA: Sorry for dropping in.
LAURA: Do we look like ourselves yet?
MATT: No, actually. This is an interesting point.
TRAVIS: Damn it.
SAM: Wait. None of you look the same.
MATT: That's right, no, thank you for reminding
me. He comes out and he goes, "How can I help
"you?"
(laughter)
LAURA: It's us!
MARISHA: Yeah, it's me. I pull the hat off and
pull my hair up. It's Beauregard. We k*lled your
snake?
LAURA: (in normal voice) Pretend that I don't
talk-- (in human accent) Pretend that I don't talk
like this.
TRAVIS: f*ck it, I drop Disguise Self.
MATT: He goes,"Ah!"
TRAVIS: I'm sorry to deceive you.
MATT: I'm very confused.
MARISHA: Oh no. Don't worry about it. What was
your name, friend?
MATT: "Rinaldo."
MARISHA: Rinaldo! That's what it was. I knew it
was an R! Okay, Rinaldo.
TRAVIS: Rinaldo, this snake that was in your house
is not the only strange occurrence that's been
happening. We're trying to find out the cause of
it. Have you seen anything else like this in the
time that's passed?
MATT: "No, we've been doing repairs on the house
and getting everything underway. This is the first
"thing that's come on this side. Most of them live
toward the center of the lake and stay underwater.
"It's been two in the last few months that have
come up. It's a bit of a nuisance."
LAURA: Have you seen any zombies coming out of the
lake?
MATT: "Zombies? What are you talking about?"
TRAVIS: We're asking after a man that helped down
at the docks, named Enon. Have you heard of him?
MATT: "Enon?"
TRAVIS: Enon.
MATT: "Yeah, I worked with him a couple times. He
comes through, looking for work, asking to see
what's available."
LIAM: You obviously have not heard the news from
the traveling circus in town. From last night.
MATT: "No. That's the big blue tent, right?"
LIAM: That's correct.
MATT: "No, what's going on?"
LAURA: (whispering) Enon turned into a zombie.
SAM: What?
LAURA: (louder) Enon turned into a zombie!
(whispering) And was k*lled.
SAM: What?
MATT: "I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible.
Wow, that's really terrible. I'm sorry."
TRAVIS: We were trying to see if he might have
worked with people that might have known what he
was doing that day, earlier.
MATT: "I haven't seen him at the docks in a while.
Not for a week, at least."
TRAVIS and LAURA: Really?
LIAM: Is there anything out of the ordinary from
the past week or two that comes to mind? Anything
off about the run-of-the-mill stuff?
MATT: "Other than a giant f*cking snake ruining my
house, but not that comes to mind, no. Circus
"coming into town, that's a little weird."
TRAVIS: I see you're skinning the beast. Can I ask
why?
MATT: "I'm not going to let it go to waste. That's
some good meat. Some good skin."
MARISHA: You mentioned the circus coming to town
as weird. Why?
MATT: "Because there's a circus in town."
LIAM: He just means out of the ordinary, yeah?
MATT: "Yeah. We don't get many shows and traveling
folk. Last time this was here, a year ago, it came
"and went in a week."
SAM: You said you hadn't seen this-- hi. You said
you hadn't seen this person in a week? Was that
unusual?
MATT: "No. I didn't keep up with him. He came
through every now and then. I had a little cash
"and needed some help hauling things around. I
asked for his assistance. He was an old fella, and
"it was less that he was helpful and more that we
wanted to help when we could."
TRAVIS: If we went down to the docks where he
worked, is there anyone that we should ask for, to
speak to, who might have known him better?
MATT: "Your guess is as good as mine. To be fair,
although we're a community, we're also relatively
"competitive. You understand."
TRAVIS: I do.
TALIESIN: You think anyone would have wanted him
marked or harmed in some way?
MATT: "I don't think so. He's an old man. I
haven't seen or heard anyone-- his disposition
"seemed positive enough, if a little sad and
lonely."
TRAVIS: If you think of anything, or if you hear
anyone speak about him, you can find us at the
Nestled Nook Inn. We'd appreciate anything, if it
happens to reach your ears.
MATT: "Of course. Let me finish up here with the
roof and I'll ask around, see if anything comes up."
TRAVIS: Much obliged.
MARISHA: How's your little girl doing? Sorry, I
cover my beard.
MATT: "It just wasn't expected."
MARISHA: Sorry.
MATT: "No, she's doing great. She's been a little
spooked, but she slept well last night. She's
"doing fine. Thank you again for what you guys did
for me."
LAURA: You're welcome.
SAM: What? For what?
LAURA: We saved a little girl!
SAM: Oh yes, that's right.
LAURA: If you see any zombies, please let us
know.
MATT: "I will. You were so kind to help me when I
saw a snake, I figure if I see a zombie, you'd
"also be helpful."
LAURA: We would, definitely. We already k*lled a
zombie too!
TALIESIN: This is just a snake. This is a big,
weird snake I'm looking at?
MATT: You can inspect it if you want.
TALIESIN: No, I've been looking at the snake this
entire time.
LAURA: Oh, we have one of its fangs. I pulled it
out.
MATT: Make a nature check.
SAM: Ooh, don't do those much either.
MARISHA: I have a fang too, right?
TALIESIN: Nine.
MATT: Nine? You don't know much about snake
biology. It's hard to tell if it's out of the
ordinary. It's just a big snake.
TALIESIN: Looks like mine.
LAURA: Only bigger.
TALIESIN: Much bigger.
TRAVIS: Shall we?
LAURA: f*ck. Sure.
SAM: We are the best detectives ever.
LAURA: I feel like we are really doing bad at this
detective thing.
TRAVIS: We should probably wrap up whatever we're
doing. I imagine they're going to come by the inn
soon and try and speak with us. Not you two.
SAM: We didn't leave any sort of Ferris Bueller-y
thing?
TRAVIS: Nope. No stuffed beds, no recordings on
the old VHS.
MATT: What are you guys doing? Where are you
going?
SAM: Is there anywhere else that we need to
inspect? The carnival or more docks stuff?
LAURA: I feel like going back to the carnival is
probably a bad idea.
TALIESIN: I'd say the docks are his home, if we
could figure out where he lived.
SAM: Where he was last seen.
TALIESIN: He was last seen at the circus!
LAURA: Rinaldo!
MATT: "Yeah?"
LAURA: Do you know where Enon lives?
MATT: "I can't say I do. I'm sorry. My apologies.
Wish I could be of more help."
LAURA: It's okay.
TALIESIN: You don't happen to know what happened
to his son, by any chance?
MATT: "I didn't even know he had a son."
LAURA: See? We're better investigators than this
guy.
SAM: But he's not trying to investigate!
TALIESIN: I take the compliment. I'm putting it my
pocket. I'm keeping it for later.
MATT: He climbs back up the ladder to the roof.
MARISHA: I'm starting to think that following
Enon's story isn't necessarily going to lead us
here. He seems like a random victim.
LAURA: Hey, 14 year old kid!
MATT: He has this puffy red 'fro going on. He
looks pale, fresh to this, scrawny. He's stopped
drawing his blade across the snake. "Yeah?"
LAURA: Do you live here?
MATT: "No, I live about three houses up."
LAURA: Did you go to the carnival?
MATT: "Last night? Yeah, I was there."
LAURA: Okay, where were you at the carnival?
MATT: "I actually snuck in under the tent after it
had started."
LAURA: Right, that's a good thing. Were you close
to Enon? In the show. Were you on that side or the
other side? Did you see the zombie?
MATT: "I saw him a little bit. He was in the front
and I had people in front of me, but I think I saw
"some of it. It was pretty cool."
LAURA: It was kind of crazy, right? Have you heard
any ghost stories around town lately? About scary
things happening?
MATT: "My grandma told me a ghost story years ago
about these giant badger creatures that live on
"the hills of the Ashkeeper that can stand up on
their hind legs, and they come down and they eat
"kids that don't go to bed in time."
LAURA: Oh sh*t. Those guys are scary, I've heard
of them. You should be really careful. Have you
heard anything about zombies?
MATT: "No, not since that."
LIAM: What's up?
LAURA: Caleb has seen some sh*t.
MATT: "I have to finish the--"
LAURA: Hey, listen, if you hear any other ghost
stories, you come and find us, okay?
MATT: "Okay."
LAURA: All right.
(laughter)
MARISHA: Are we just going from person to person
in town telling them to come find us?
SAM: We are really terrible at this!
TALIESIN: Well, she's making friends with
everybody. I don't see any of you making friends.
TRAVIS: I'm a little concerned that we've been
gone for a while.
MARISHA: Yeah, maybe we should get back.
TRAVIS: Maybe let these two, that aren't under
house arrest--
SAM: Continue the investigation? Or go back?
TRAVIS: No, continue. I mean, if you're up for
it.
SAM: Yeah, yeah, We'll be a regular--
LIAM: Yeah, we've done nothing wrong. We're not
sweating it. I'm not sweating--
LAURA: Yeah, I believe you completely. That was
very believable. I'm going to give you another
blessing before you leave, okay?
LIAM: What are you talking about? None of us did
anything. None of us! We protected the people of
this town!
LAURA: It's true.
LIAM: It is true.
LAURA: I know.
LIAM: That's easy. Let's go solve a mystery,
Nott.
SAM: All right.
TALIESIN: Were you being sarcastic-- oh, no you
weren't, okay. Catching up on that.
MARISHA: So, kids don't know anything about this,
old people don't know anything about this--
TRAVIS: Tavern-keeper doesn't know anything about
this.
TALIESIN: Only the pure of heart make their answer
out of riddles. Back to the tavern.
MARISHA: But pure of heart! Still going back to
the guards thing! Back to the tavern, let's go.
SAM: Were we just on the docks?
MATT: Yeah, you guys were at the docks.
LIAM: We came up with bupkus.
LAURA: We didn't ask anybody, we went straight to
the house.
SAM: Okay, we'll walk around the docks and look
for--
TRAVIS: We'll see you back at the inn.
SAM: All right.
LAURA: Should we run back, or should we saunter
back?
TALIESIN: You're going to probably, you know,
poof.
MARISHA: Yeah, how much time does she have?
LIAM: About a minute?
MATT: Yeah, it's about to fade.
LAURA: Yeah, I figured it had already happened
probably midway talking to the kid.
MATT: Probably.
MARISHA: Maybe super stealthily back?
LAURA: All right. I put my hood up.
TALIESIN: I can maybe put a rope through the
window.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's a good idea.
LAURA: Is it a two-story?
MATT: It's a two-story. You guys are up in the
second story.
TALIESIN: I got rope.
LAURA: Let's do that, yeah. We'll sneak around the
back of the inn, and try to climb up the upstairs
window.
TRAVIS: I can keep them busy at the front door.
TALIESIN: I'll go through the front like a proper
person.
MATT: All right, so you guys are setting up a rope
to climb up the back? You go in, on your own, up
to the top, you put a rope through--
MARISHA: Fjord's distracting.
LAURA: In the front. Then we're going to try to
sneak--
TALIESIN: Right, and then I'm going to drop some
of the rope out the back window for them.
MATT: Easy enough to do, so those of you who want
to wait and can take the rope up, you wait for a
moment where nobody's watching and climb your way
up into the inn safely and get to your rooms. You
two, what are you doing?
TALIESIN: (singing) 50 feet of hemp rope, it's a
standard!
LIAM: Hey kiddo, do you want a piggy-back?
SAM: Sure, that sounds like a good idea.
LIAM: Scramble up, let's go talk to some people.
SAM: All right, I'll jump on Caleb's back.
MATT: All right.
LIAM: I'll wander down to where people are
working. Where people are moving crates around.
MARISHA: He's on Caleb's back!
MATT: Okay, that would be probably closer to the
Northward.
LIAM: Okay, so that's the plan, is to look for
people moving crap around, the same way that Enon
is said to have. So that's what we'll do.
MATT: Okay, make an investigation check.
LIAM: All right.
SAM: Shall I help, or no?
MATT: If you want to.
LIAM: Not that great.
MATT: You aiding him would give him an advantage
in the roll.
LIAM: Oh! That didn't help. 12 for me.
MATT: You take a couple hours wandering through
the Northward, asking questions, and most of the
information you get is, they have no idea who that
is, or like, "Ah, he died? It's about time."
LIAM: And there's no point even asking questions
because we've asked them all for two hours, yeah?
MATT: I'd say yeah, based on that roll.
LIAM: Okay, well that's a big zero. You want to go
book shopping with me?
SAM: Sure!
LIAM: Okay. I believe that gentleman said that the
Burnished Bibliots was in the Northward, correct?
MATT: I believe you are correct. Yeah, it's in the
southern portion of the Northward by where it
borders the Lochward.
LIAM: Okay, so I'll start asking questions to get
us there.
MATT: Easily enough. You eventually are led to it,
and you come to a closet that's affixed to another
building. The wood used are almost driftwood and
heavily weathered, and the front door is closed as
you approach. It looks like a glorified storage
shed that has been bolted and put up against
another structure.
LIAM: All right, well I will walk up to the door
and knock on it.
MATT: Okay. (knocks) No response.
LIAM: Is there any breaks in the door or the
building or cracks that Frumpkin could fit into?
MATT: Visual glance, there look like there's that
space underneath the door.
Probably not enough for a cat to slip through.
LIAM: Are there any windows or anything or is it
all a big, dirty, dingy mess?
MATT: There are windows, but if you look at the
back of the windows all you see is scraps of
material, stacks of books, piles of boxes and
crates, it's literally blocked out with things
stacked up against it from the interior.
LIAM: How busy is the front of this place?
MATT: Not busy at all, it's just the two of you,
right now, standing at the front door.
LIAM: No one's around us, though?
MATT: It's not on the main street, it's a little
pushed back, recessed about ten or 15 feet from
the main road so there's no one immediately around
you. But there are people walking back and forth
on the road behind but you're out in the open, per
se.
SAM: And no one's coming to the door?
MATT: No one's come to the door yet, no.
SAM: Want me to break in?
LIAM: Yes. No.
[knocking]
MATT: Okay. A moment passes and you hear, "Hold
on!" The door opens. It was open. There's the
sound of heavy sacks go tumbling down to the
interior of it and you glance around and you hear
a voice go, "Can I help you?"
LIAM: Hello?
MATT: You look down, and there's this
crotchety-looking scrawny old gnome who's sitting
there in the doorway. He's got this vibrant puff,
like a cotton ball, of hair around his head. But
it's this perfect "U" of bald on top. No glasses,
eyes are very small and beady, and he has this
bulbous, round nose at the front with this little
bit of a tuft of chin white hair that matches the
cotton ball tuft on the sides. He's sitting there
clutching the top of the knob on the inside which
is actually affixed shorter on the door and he
goes, "Well come in."
LIAM: Yes please, you're open for business I take
it.
MATT: "Always open, come on in."
LIAM: All right.
MATT: Turns around and musters his way inside. As
soon as you step in the door and look around, this
place looks like an episode of Hoarders. It is
just floor-to-ceiling, wall-to-wall, stacks of
anything and everything: knick-knacks, small
stuffed animals, toys, books, glasses, and
goblets. It is the biggest, crammed flea-market
into a small shed-like space you've seen.
SAM: I start unscrewing my flask.
(laughing)
LIAM: Frumpkin climbs back up onto Nott's shoulder
and nestles in.
MATT: (meowing)
LIAM: I am scouting the city for books, I am
starved for books.
MATT: "Well we've got books here."
LIAM: Yes sir, I'm sorry what is your name?
MATT: "Oglen. Oglen Hornsblower."
LIAM: Oglen Hornsblower.
MATT: "And welcome to my collection. You want to
buy something, let me know."
LIAM: Well I see you sell a great many things in
here, books included. This is just things you've
collected throughout your lifetime?
MATT: "Right. Boughten, traded for, found."
LIAM: I don't know what you just said, but I am
interested in books. Particularly in the arcane
realm, but any kind of book. Do you have anything
that you just outright know is out of the
ordinary?
MATT: "I'm sure we've got a few. Look around! See
what you find. It's half the fun, half the
"journey."
LIAM: All right, friend, let's-- It's like
Winter's Crest morning for me and I'm scanning the
shelves.
MATT: Make an investigation check.
SAM: Can you give me something to look for? To
distract me and give me a mission to go on,
please?
LIAM: Yes. You want to find some sort of tool that
helps you do what you do best.
SAM: All right.
LIAM: Investigation check, that is a 21.
MATT: 21?
SAM: I rolled a 21 investigation check.
MATT: All right.
SAM: I'm just looking for baubles to steal.
(laughter)
MATT: All right. In thumbing through, there are
plenty of books that, within a first glance,
"This is not of interest to me." You have to move things
out of the way and push things aside.
The smell in there is dusty and moldy
and you do find there is
some subtle water damage and some mildew growing
in one far corner and you're like ugh, put that
back. However, you rolled really high. Two things
catch your eye. One, there appears to be the
remnants of some sort of notebook, a sketchbook
that is written in a language you do not
understand-- What languages do you know?
LIAM: Well, off the bat, I don't know where that
is in D&D Beyond yet. But if I open up my binder I
bet I have a paper version that I can verify with.
I speak Sylvan, Common, and Celestial and I also
can Comprehend Languages as a ritual spell but I
think that takes some time.
MATT: It does take ten minutes.
LIAM: Ten minutes.
MATT: But you glance through the book, and while
you cannot read the text you do recognize that
there are elements at the back of the book that
have a hint of arcane nature. That's one of two
books you find with that roll.
SAM: It's like the adult section for him.
MATT: I know. The second book you find is written
in Zemnian, which you can read.
LIAM: That's correct.
MATT: The title translates to Fiends of Folklore.
LIAM: I'm so happy. You have quite a shop here.
MATT: "I know I do!"
LIAM: You have some real treasures. I'm
particularly interested in both of these books.
MATT: "Good choices, good choices."
LIAM: I don't know though, I don't think that-- I
mean I'm rather tight on coin at the moment so--
MATT: "That's too bad."
LIAM: Maybe my eyes are too big for my stomach.
MATT: He's pulling the books away from you.
LIAM: How much would you part with these for?
MATT: (sniffs) He holds of the Fiends of Folklore
book, "Three gold pieces. This one, (sniffs)--
"ten gold pieces."
LIAM: Which one is which?
MATT: The Fiends of Folklore is the three, the
other tome.
LIAM: The arcane, weird one.
MATT: You're not quite sure what's in it.
LIAM: Okay. Would you have any interest in a magic
cat?
MATT: "I'm sorry?"
LIAM: Frumpkin disappears from on Nott's shoulder.
Reappears next to the little man.
MATT: (yelps) He like throws the books and grabs
nearby this large sack and starts--
angrily beating the cat.
LIAM: I'll take that as a no!
TRAVIS: Childhood cat, destroyed!
MATT: He does hit Frumpkin. Frumpkin takes one
point of bludgeoning damage.
LIAM: That might be it, I don't really know. I
didn't think that this would happen so quickly.
TRAVIS: Faced with our own mortality.
LAURA: Frumpkin point two.
MARISHA: Yeah, he updates overnight as long as
he's plugged in, right?
LIAM: Hold on, I have to see if Frumpkin is still
here.
TRAVIS: Must be plugged in and connected to Wifi.
MARISHA: Type in your passcode if you agree to the
terms.
LIAM: One hit point of damage?
MATT: Yes.
LIAM: He's still here.
MATT: There you go. Frumpkin immediately darts off
jumps on your shoulder, turns around and
(hisses).
LIAM: So you don't like cats, I understand that.
MATT: "Sorry, it caught me off-guard."
LIAM: Well I was trying to sample the merchandise
for you. Because if it was just a cat it was just
a cat, but this one-- changes to my other
shoulder-- he's a magic cat.
MATT: "Okay."
LIAM: You can roll him in mud, he comes back
clean. He disappears, he reappears, he brings you
things.
MATT: "Can you make him go away?"
LIAM: Gone.
MATT: "Thank you. Now we can continue to talk
money."
LIAM: Here's what I propose. I do not have ten
gold at the moment. But it doesn't feel like you
get a lot of thoroughfare here, so I'm going to
come back to purchase this later. That's it.
That's the end of my spiel; that's all I've got.
I'm interested, and thank you for giving me the
time.
MATT: "Of course. Sorry about your cat, friend."
LIAM: It's okay. Nott?
SAM: Have I heard all of this conversation?
MATT: You've been hearing all of it, but you've
also found, amongst the chaos, a brass baby bottle
that's fairly dented, but it's very shiny and
polished, you can already see on the inside. You
find a new flask, actually. It's very tarnished,
but you spit and rub it a little bit. It looks to
be of very fine metallic material. You're not
entirely sure, you'd have to clean it, but it
looks like very nice quality material.
SAM: All right. I'll try to trade my flask with
that flask.
MATT: Make a sleight of hand check.
TRAVIS: Indiana Jones style.
SAM: 22!
TALIESIN: How?!
SAM: Wait. More. No, that's right. 22.
MATT: Now, your flask, which still has liquor in
it, is left behind for the empty flask you
receive. However, without an instance of anyone
even paying attention. It is yours. You can write
in your inventory you are now the owner of a
platinum flask.
ALL: Ooh!
SAM: sh*t! Okay! It's a baby bottle, or maybe a
rattle? What'd you say?
MATT: Baby bottle. Looks like it was used as a
bottle for a very upper-class family.
TALIESIN: You're already so ahead, though!
SAM: I know. But I can't resist. I'll try to take
one more look and pocket that as well.
MATT: Make another sleight of hand check, please.
SAM: 20.
MATT: It just vanishes into your cloak! It's the
craziest thing! It was there and it's gone!
TRAVIS: Yes!
SAM: Are we going to leave now? Should we leave? I
think we should leave. Maybe we should go. Do you
need some money? I could lend you some money, if
you want.
LIAM: Maybe we'll come back tomorrow.
SAM: All right. Lovely place you got here!
LIAM: Piggyback?
SAM: Yes, please!
MATT: "I'll hold these books for you! Come back
when you can!"
LIAM: Within the week, I promise.
MATT: "All right. Have a good day, little girl!"
SAM: I will!
MATT: You guys exit the building.
SAM: I'm sorry! I did it again, I couldn't help
it. I took some things. Do you think he noticed?
Do you think we're in trouble? Maybe we should
hurry back.
LIAM: I don't think he saw.
SAM: All right. Are you cross with me?
LIAM: No. Just wait one moment, okay? Wait for me
here?
SAM: Okay. I heard you talking about money, by the
way, I could lend you some, if you'd like.
LIAM: Wait right here. I cast Detect Magic just
before I walk back into the store. I look all
around. What are your hours, here? As I look to
see if there is anything besides that book,
anything.
MATT: You glance throughout the interior, and you
don't sense anything magical, unfortunately,
within the piles of rubble.
LIAM: Besides the book he put down?
MATT: The book's not radiating any magical aura.
But he answers. "Oh! All hours! I don't really
"close. I don't really sleep."
LIAM: Middle of the night, even?
MATT: "Sure!"
LIAM: All right. Business is business. Thank you!
MATT: "No worries. See you then!"
LIAM: Bis später.
MATT: "Pee shmiter!"
LIAM: That guy does not speak Zemnian!
MATT: No, he does not.
LIAM: Let's go back to the hotel, shall we?
SAM: Let's do it.
MATT: While they're away, you guys wait there for
a bit, getting stir crazy in the process of
waiting in your room. Jester and Beauregard,
there's a knock at your door.
LAURA: Hello?
MATT: "Please open, it's Crownsguard."
LAURA: Hold on, I'm naked!
(whispering) Yeah, I don't know. Do you
want to put clothes on?
Should we take our clothes off?
MARISHA: Did you say that because you wanted to
tell me something?
LAURA: No, I just wanted to make them wait. Okay,
I'm dressed now!
MARISHA: I like that. We're giving them--
authority. Got the upper hand. Okay.
LAURA: It's a power play.
MARISHA: Do we invite them in or are we going
to--? You open the door. I'm going to sit,
unassuming, on the bed.
LAURA: Sit! Come in, please.
MARISHA: Oh!
MATT: The door opens, and there are two
crownsguards there, standing, shields to the
side.
LAURA: Oh hello, I wasn't expecting you.
MARISHA: Oh, yeah, hi.
MATT: "We're here to notify you that the
investigation is ongoing. You will not be needed
"today. Please remain in your premises. Be back
tomorrow."
TRAVIS: Jury summon.
MARISHA: Bullshit! Jury duty sh*t! g*dd*mn it!
TALIESIN: We are at D&D Jury Duty.
MATT: Yes you are.
MARISHA: Seven dollars a day? What is this sh*t?
LAURA: Can I ask you a question before you leave?
MATT: "Yes, what is your question?"
LAURA: Are you guys going to be the same people
coming back tomorrow?
MATT: "Possibly."
LAURA: What is your names?
MATT: They look at each other, look back at you.
"I am Jonas." The other guy pipes up, he's a
little younger, he goes, "I am Lucas."
LAURA: Jonas and Lucas, very good names.
MARISHA: You guys should start a band. Like a boy
band or something.
LAURA: Yeah, that'd be good. Girls would go crazy.
If you guys want to play some games tomorrow,
we'll just be here!
MATT: "Very well! Have a good day." They look at
each other like, "What?" and close the door.
LAURA: I shouldn't have offered the game. What if
we want to leave and then they want to take us up
on the game thing?
MARISHA: I thought you enjoyed games.
LAURA: No, I love games!
MARISHA: Sure.
LAURA: But what if we leave and then they want to
play games?
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: Onto Fjord's door.
TALIESIN: I'm sitting playing with the cards.
TRAVIS: I open it.
MATT: Same two guards there. Lucas and Jonas.
Jonas and Lucas. "Hello. The investigation is
"ongoing. You'll not be needed for today. We will
return tomorrow."
TRAVIS: I shut the door.
TALIESIN: Any progress?
MATT: There's a pause and then you here the subtle
shifting of greaves against the wooden floor as
they slowly walk away.
TRAVIS: Go take that game in the other room, why
don't you?
TALIESIN: That was a power move right there.
TRAVIS: Thank you.
MATT: You guys return to the inn.
SAM: I guess we do.
MATT: Yes you do.
SAM: Well. That was terrible. No one found out
anything. It was a waste of a day. We're all
terrible at this. Goodnight?
LAURA: What time is it?
MARISHA: That's not true! I still say that some of
the best information that you can get can be in
the information that you don't find.
SAM: That is nonsense.
MARISHA: I'm just saying! Sometimes the lack of
information can be a process of elimination.
TRAVIS: Sure.
MARISHA: It's super broad!
TALIESIN: No, you know what? I'm going to take
it.
MARISHA: I'm trying to be f*cking silver lining,
so I don't feel like a piece of sh*t for waste a
day, and you guys are sh1tting on that, but it's
fine.
TRAVIS: You found nothing at the docks, zip,
zero?
LIAM: We spent hours there, no one knew anything
about the old man.
MARISHA: See? No one knew anything about him. That
means, prime candidate, someone's little
experiment. Little Frankenstein. I'm telling you.
LIAM: I don't really understand what she's
saying.
LAURA: I don't either. I'm going to run up and
down the stairs for a while.
MATT: (quick footsteps)
TALIESIN: How long have you known this one?
MARISHA: Who are you talking to?
TALIESIN: Anybody who's watching this happen.
MARISHA: About 24 hours longer than you have.
TALIESIN: That explains a lot.
MATT: At one point, Adelaine the barmaid comes up.
"I'm sorry, can you please stop?"
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: "Thank you!"
SAM: Hey, Dungeon Master?
MATT: Yes?
SAM: The other night, when Nott was out carousing
a bit while Caleb was asleep. He saw some figures
in cloaks dash by. Was there any distinctive
anything about these three figures that
dashed by?
MATT: Not that you noticed, unfortunately.
SAM: Damn it. Okay, I will share that information
with the group. I saw some weirdos running
around.
LAURA: When?
SAM: The other night, when he was asleep.
TRAVIS: How late?
SAM: Two in the morning?
LIAM: You were out that late?
SAM: Sorry.
LAURA: Maybe we should go out at two o'clock in
the morning and see if we can find them.
MARISHA: Ooh, that's a good idea.
LAURA: Follow them.
MARISHA: You guys notice that it's weird that no
one's actually really talking about this? This is
a small town. I come from a small town. Small town
people gossip.
TALIESIN: I feel like there should be some more
gossip then there is, that's very true.
MARISHA: Someone is talking about this, we just
haven't found them yet. 2:00AM field trip!
LAURA: We can always leave through the window this
time.
MARISHA: Mm-hmm, I like that.
TRAVIS: I can be down for that.
TALIESIN: I leave the rope tied in here. Can we
use your cat? Reel it back up in so that there's
no trace of us until we need to get back there.
LIAM: Are you asking for my cat to haul up our
rope?
TALIESIN: No, I'm telling you that your cat is
going to haul up a rope.
LAURA: How is a cat going to lift up a rope?
TALIESIN: It's not that heavy of a rope, it's just
hemp.
MATT: Hemp rope can be pretty heavy.
TALIESIN: Well, if I throw it back up there then I
imagine you cat can knock it back down at the very
least.
LAURA: There, that would work, maybe.
MARISHA: Oh, is he like an as*h*le cat?
TALIESIN: I assume he's an as*h*le cat. Aren't all
cats as*h*le cats?
MATT: This is true.
LAURA: It might be down before we come back, is
the thing.
TALIESIN: I assume he's going to-- that's fair.
TRAVIS: Where were you when you saw these cloaked
figures?
SAM: I had gone out to do some window shopping.
TRAVIS: At 2:00AM?
SAM: Yes, I wasn't very successful. I had walked
by the general store--
LAURA: Oh, we went there.
MARISHA: Yeah, we did.
SAM: I passed by a place called Natural Remedies,
herbs and medicinal things. I went by a spot named
Jackalwere, it's a smithy.
LAURA: Okay, but where did you see the cloaked
guys?
SAM: It was between-- I don't remember.
MATT: It was one block north of the Natural
Remedies.
MARISHA: Natural Remedies. What was the other one?
Jackalwere?
SAM: I think that was what it was called.
MATT: Yeah, Jackalwere Smiths.
SAM: We could do a little stakeout!
TRAVIS: We could.
MARISHA: That's true. How do people send messages
in this town? Have we figured that out?
SAM: Probably by foot or by horse, right?
TALIESIN: Not that big of a town.
TRAVIS: Should someone stay up? Well, I was
thinking someone should keep a lookout on the roof
of the inn in case someone comes for us while
everyone else is out.
LAURA: How would we let anybody know?
TRAVIS: I don't know. Can you conjure those golden
orbs up into the air as like a signal?
LIAM: It's pretty limited. They don't go that
far.
TRAVIS: Maybe we just risk it.
SAM: Yeah!
LAURA: Let's risk it.
TRAVIS: It's 2:00AM, I'm sure everybody will be
asleep. Let's risk it.
MARISHA: Before we leave--
is there a window in
the hall? Or are there only windows in our bedrooms?
MATT: There is no window in the hall, only in the
rooms.
MARISHA: Okay, that's fine. On our side of the
room--
MATT: You have three rooms between you.
TALIESIN: There's three rooms and they all have
windows.
MATT: Correct.
MARISHA: On our side of the door, I'm going to
take out my healer's kit. Do I have any bandages
or medical tape or anything like that?
MATT: Not medical tape, but there are clean strips
of cloth and some adhesive bandages, basic
general--
LAURA: No tape?!
MARISHA: I'm going to tie a bandage ever so
lightly around one side of the handle onto
something on to the other side of the door. If
there's something like a lamp or some kind of pipe
or something I can tie it to.
LAURA: So that we'll know if someone tried to come
in the room?
MARISHA: Correct.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: You can pull one bandage out and affix to
one of the chair legs nearby. You could do that.
TALIESIN: Oh for god's sake. I pull out a big
thing of string.
MARISHA: Okay, yeah. I'll take some string and
just some twine and--
LAURA: What are we going to do? Leave through our
window?
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: To their window?
MARISHA: Well, I figured we're all in the same
room at this point.
LIAM: What are you trying to do?
MARISHA: I'm trying to make sure that if someone
tries to come in our room we'll know if they come in.
LIAM: I can take care of that.
TALIESIN: Oh, well then, I'm taking my string
back.
MARISHA: What can you do?
LIAM: I have some magic for that.
SAM: Yeah, he has a magical spell that alerts you
when someone tries to break in your room.
LIAM: That is correct. Yeah. I will take a moment
to do that and it will let me know.
SAM: Best part is, it doesn't alert him when I
sneak in or out.
LIAM: That you know of.
SAM: Wait. What?
LIAM: One mile of the warded area.
SAM: Ooh!
MARISHA: That's better! Let's do that.
LIAM: I just need ten minutes. And I pull out a
little spool of silvered thread and stretch it
out. Where did you want this? Over the window?
MARISHA: Well, I was going to say in the door, but
if there's maybe a place in the hall.
LIAM: Well, I can do the entire room really, I can
go doorknob to-- The funny thing about this
thread, there's no end to it. So I start looping
it all the way around the room and tie it off, and
take out one of my books from the holster, the one
on the left side, and I open it up. You guys watch
as I spend ten minutes referring to the book and
tracing symbols on the floor. Along, underneath
the thread, and about ten minutes of time, nothing
happens, but that's taken care of.
LAURA: Nice.
SAM: See, he's really good.
LAURA: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Didn't really look like much.
LIAM: Yeah, either that or I'm really bullshitting
you and nothing happened.
LAURA: Either way, I liked it. Let's sneak out.
TALIESIN: I'm going to do one last thing before we
leave, which is just tussle the room a bit so it
looks like it's been robbed. Just in case they do
come in.
MATT: Okay, so you toss the room a bit, muddle up
the space, and you guys, one by one, climb out the
back of the window, down the rope, and into the
alley behind the inn. Looking about, you're
waiting until about post-midnight, you said?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: Okay, so it's dark. The various lanterns
that dangle on the hook poles at different
intersections of the street are lit. Other than
that, you have a faint bit of moonlight that's
coming through the sky. There are some clouds, but
they're a bit broken up, so every now and then the
moon cover can vanish and then return, but for now
you have moonlight in the city. Where are you guys
going?
LAURA: Towards the north end.
TRAVIS: I ought to be leading the way, I reckon.
SAM: Yeah, I'll go to where I saw the three
cloaked figures.
MATT: A little ways north of Natural Remedies?
Okay. I would like everybody to make a stealth
check, please.
SAM: Stealth check. Do I still have the blessing?
No, I don't.
LAURA: No, you don't. But I can do it to
everybody, one by one, if we get to an open area.
SAM: 21.
TRAVIS: 15.
MARISHA: 19.
TALIESIN: 17.
LAURA: 21.
LIAM: Forty-- 12.
SAM: 42.
MATT: You guys, following Nott, dodge between
alleys, there are a few patrols of the crownsguard
that you see passing by, and you wait for them to
just cross paths, and then move on. Eventually
finding your way to Natural Remedies, seemingly
unseen. It's quiet, you can hear the sound of
crickets in the distance. The cold night air is
causing your breath to show every time you exhale,
you all bundle your cloaks as you move on. The
moonlight fades a bit, things get darker, but you
follow Nott's lead, travel from place to place.
You finally get to the outskirts of Natural
Remedies, and to the northern alleyway where you'd
originally seen those figures pass. You're there.
SAM: Should we fan out a bit? Cover a couple
corners, so we can still see each other?
TRAVIS: Good idea.
LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to go with Fjord.
MARISHA: Let's not spread out too far, though.
SAM: Are you two like an item?
LAURA: What?
SAM: You and Fjord, are you like a thing?
LAURA: Why, are you interested in him?
SAM: No, ugh, no!
LAURA: No?
SAM: You travel together.
LAURA: Well yeah, he's a good friend. He watches
out for me, I watch out for him, you know. We're a
good team. Like you and Caleb.
SAM: Not at all like that, but yes, all right.
MATT: As you guys fan out a little bit, everyone
make a perception check.
LAURA: Natural one.
SAM: 19.
LAURA: I don't see sh*t.
MARISHA: Perception?
TALIESIN: 12.
TRAVIS: Nine.
MARISHA: 18.
LIAM: Ten.
MATT: Okay, so all of you, except for Jester,
manage to get a clear view of your vicinity.
Jester, you somehow get an eyelash caught in your
eye and spend the next hour trying to get it out,
but it's in the eyelid.
LAURA: Fjord, can you see it?
TRAVIS: Look up. Yeah.
MARISHA: To the left.
TRAVIS: Let me get it--
LAURA: No, no, no. Okay, okay, okay.
MATT: Occasionally, you can hear the crownsguard
approaching, and they carry their torches with
them. You can see the light crawling forward, so
you all duck out of the way and let them pass.
About an hour passes. Two hours pass. Around the
third hour, you get the sensation that whatever
you saw the other night is not arriving on a
clockwork time or not arriving at all. It's about
three in the morning, in the center of the city by
yourself. What do you wish to do?
MARISHA: Three in the morning?
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: I turn to Caleb. Any tingling from your
alarm system?
LIAM: No, I wouldn't have brought it up if
something had happened.
MARISHA: That's a good point.
TALIESIN: I'm just going to try to meditate on the
strange death and see if I can feel anything.
MATT: Okay.
Make an intelligence check.
TALIESIN: All right. Just see how this goes.
SAM: Mediation check.
TALIESIN: 17.
MATT: Pouring over the details of what has
transpired and what you guys have done so far to
find information, there are still things to
inquire about. There are still things to wonder
and discover and there are a few places you
haven't been to. A few places you haven't returned
to. A few people you haven't even inquired about
closer to the investigation.
LAURA: Oh, we should talk to the girl.
SAM: Toya?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: Let's go wake her a*s up.
MARISHA: Is she under arrest? We don't know.
TALIESIN: Maybe we have to go back to the circus.
LAURA: Maybe it was Yasha.
TALIESIN: It's early enough maybe we should
just--
TRAVIS: We have a few more hours and the cover of
darkness.
SAM: Yeah, let's go wake her a*s up.
MARISHA: Maybe we should go back to the circus.
Scene of the crime? That whole thing?
TALIESIN: I hate to admit it, but maybe-- it's not
us.
TRAVIS: Who's real stealthy?
MARISHA: I'm all right.
TRAVIS: Maybe we don't all need to go. Maybe
just a few, and the others will hang back.
SAM: Hang back close by though, right? If
something goes bad--
MARISHA: Or if you see something. How far are we
from the inn?
MATT: From the inn? About a 15 minute jog.
SAM: So we can go to the circus?
TRAVIS: An hour and a half.
LAURA: While we're still trying to figure this
out, I'm going to take out my painter's kit and
draw like a little piece of poop on the side of
the building that we're next to.
SAM: Tagging? That's good.
MARISHA: A little tagger.
TRAVIS: Is it like a mound of poop or like a
single--?
LAURA: No it's like a mound of poop.
TALIESIN: It's like an emoji.
MATT: Make a performance check.
LAURA: Oh I rolled really low on this one. Four!
MATT: It takes a little convincing to have them
see the poop in the drawing. You can see it, but
you've seen better.
TRAVIS: Is it a worm? It's a snake.
LAURA: It's poop, I should've--
LIAM: That's an oval.
LAURA: I should have drawn a pile of poop. I
draw a pile of poop next to it.
MATT: It helps, but--
LIAM: That's a triangle.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I thought it was like chocolate
frozen yogurt.
TALIESIN: Is math or something?
LAURA: It's dark okay?! I can usually paint much
better than this. It's really dark and my hands
feel a little numb.
SAM: Let's move then.
MATT: Who's going where? What are you guys doing?
ALL: We're all going to the circus.
TRAVIS: Stealthily to the circus.
MATT: All right, I would like for all of you to
roll a stealth check.
MARISHA: Is no one staying behind or--?
LAURA: f*ck it!
SAM: Some are staying away from the tent.
TRAVIS: Yeah, going in danger close.
SAM: 13.
TRAVIS: Nine.
MARISHA: Oh not great. Nine!
TALIESIN: Seven.
LAURA: 19.
LIAM: 15.
SAM: 13.
MATT: Okay, you guys make your way through most of
the Docksward on your way to the large blue tent
that still stands ominously in the distance.
Thankfully, the moon has come out and cast this
rimlight against the structure, so it's easy to
see. As you guys are making your way outside of
the Lochward, you immediately see the approaching
torchlight of crownsguard. One of them you just
faintly hear 40 or 50 feet ahead of you, "Who goes
there?"
LAURA: Oh sh*t.
SAM: Is there only one guard?
MATT: It's two guards, side by side. These watches,
they patrol in pairs.
MARISHA: Are we in like an alleyway, or in the
street?
MATT: You guys are keeping off to the side. You're
all on the outskirts of the lake and almost made
your way out of the city towards where the--
LAURA: Go in the lake. Quick, go into the lake!
TRAVIS: I cast Disguise Self, and I turn myself
into a crownsguard.
LIAM: Disguise Self and follow suit.
MATT: You do as well?
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: All right. So you both become crownsguard.
You've all of a sudden are adorned in the goldish
brass and red armor.
TALIESIN: I'm in my black hood. I've got my hood
up now.
SAM: Anywhere to hide?
MATT: There are some small alcoves, but you guys
are out in the open, now. They've seen you.
MARISHA: All of us?
MATT: You don't know. They've seen you. They've
called to you, and then both of you guys
disguised yourselves. What are you doing?
LAURA: I walk into the lake and crouch down?
MATT: Jester walks up and wades in about six
inches of water and just-- gives her best duck
impression.
SAM: I will take off my mask and start attacking
Caleb in a convincing fashion. Not to draw blood
but-- yeah.
MATT: Make a deception check.
SAM: Deception check?
MATT: Yes.
SAM: Oh.
LIAM: Can I start going (groans) Oh get off, you
little beast! To help with the illusion?
SAM: (snarling noises)
MATT: Sure, make a deception check.
SAM: Oh, my deception check was a three minus
three.
LIAM: But roll with advantage.
SAM: At advantage?
LIAM: I'm helping you, you little--
SAM: Seven minus three!
LIAM: Oh no!
MATT: Okay so as soon as these two crownsguard see
this, they go "sh*t!" They pull their blades and
they start charging you, Nott, to try and protect
their other crownsguard--
LIAM: I take Nott and slam her into a wall as hard
as I can and say: Down you beast!
MATT: All right, as you rush up in a jog, blades
drawn, one of them is going to go ahead and
attempt to strike.
SAM: Oh god! Sure.
MATT: That is going to be a 14 to hit.
SAM: Miss!
MATT: So you manage to (squeaks) and narrowly
dodge the blade as it strikes through the back of
your cloak and pins it to the side of a wooden
pole that is on the outside of an overhang where
some of the fish are being left out to dry and
turn into fish jerky. It holds you in place as
you're snarling and looking scared. The other one
pulls out his blade and says "Where did this thing
"come from!?"
LIAM: I have it! And I punch Nott right in the
face.
SAM: Oh!
MATT: All right, you take one point of bludgeoning
damage, Nott, and blood just (flowing noise) from
the nose.
LIAM: I have this. We're taking these people across
to jail.
TRAVIS: (Regal voice) Indeed, stay our blade,
please, obviously he can handle this.
LIAM: Don't you f*cking move you little green
piece of filth.
SAM: (spits)
TRAVIS: Right in your face! Haha, incredible.
LIAM: This one is mine, thank you. Beat her within
an inch of her life.
MATT: I need you to make a deception check on that
one.
TALIESIN: We are just the worst. This is just
terrible.
MARISHA: Oh man.
LIAM: Natural 20.
(cheering)
SAM: We've practiced this before. We got this
routine down.
MATT: You see a look of disappointment come across
the two crownsguards' faces in their inability to
help you skewer this small, feral creature. They
both put their blades away. "All right if you see
"anything else, give a shout. (spits)"
SAM: Ugh.
MATT: They both continue their walk past the rest
of you.
LIAM: The rest of you lot fall in line. I drag the
little one off.
SAM: (snivels)
MATT: They look over at the tiefling-- partially
crouched in the water.
SAM: She's taking a sh*t.
LAURA: I really had to pee!
MATT: "Hey! Not in the Ustaloch!"
(laughter)
LAURA: Okay. Oh okay. I get out. I stand up and
slowly dredge out of the water.
MATT: Your legs are soaked from thigh to foot, and
they both eye you warily and slowly walk past.
LAURA: (sigh of relief)
MARISHA: It's real cold out.
LIAM: Have they cleared the way?
MATT: Eventually, they pass beyond a point where
you feel absolute dread of their presence.
TRAVIS: Is that a natural thing for you guys to
just attack each other in moments of stress?
LIAM: Are you all right? I am so very sorry, I'm
so sorry--
SAM: No, I'm fine that was good acting. You were
perfect. I panicked, I didn't know what to do. I
was trying to create some sort of distraction.
LIAM: Let me see your teeth. Okay. You look all
right.
SAM: They're all over the place.
(laughter)
TRAVIS: Oh, I can't tell if that got worse or
better.
MARISHA: You fixed them a bit!
LIAM: Okay. Who wants to go to the circus?
MARISHA: Yay.
MATT: All right, you guys are make the rest of the
path to the outskirts of the circus. You see at
the very front flap of it you see a crownsguard
who's like (yawn) sitting there, his arms crossed
to the front keeping an eye out, he is doing
late-shift. You do see the faint distant
flickering glow of firelight from the back side of
the circus.
MARISHA: What is that? Do you guys have like a
nightlight?
TALIESIN: It's where we camp.
MATT: Yeah, you saw it earlier, you saw the
campfire.
MARISHA: Oh sure.
TRAVIS: If you want to make your ways around, I
could distract them for a moment, have a
conversation with them.
MARISHA: Do they still look like crownsguard?
MATT: Yes.
TRAVIS: For an hour.
MARISHA: Okay, yeah.
LIAM: You you want to go with them? I'll go with
him.
SAM: Sure, but will you be watching me or no? You
don't have to.
LIAM: Frumpkin will go with you.
SAM: All right. I'll go with you and-- who else is
going? Are you stealthy?
LAURA: We'll take care of you. Don't worry!
TALIESIN: They're not going to talk to you without
me, so I'm coming, too.
LIAM: I'm a little jittery, do you want to be a
front man for a little while?
TRAVIS: Sure I got it, yeah.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: All right, so what are the groups here?
SAM: The girls and the boys.
TRAVIS: Caleb and me--
LAURA: And Molly.
SAM: And whatever Molly is.
(laughter)
TALIESIN: I'm fabulous.
MATT: Molly, who are you going with?
TALIESIN: I'm going with the girls, because the
circus kids won't talk to them without me.
MATT: All right, so the three of you are going
forward. What are you doing? I guess I should
ask.
TRAVIS: I walk up to the guard. (regal voice) It's
a late night, not much action this evening. See
anything unusual?
MATT: "Eh, nothing yet. Mostly I hate this. Ugh, I
just wish this whole f*cking circus would just go.
"I need to sleep. Regular hours."
TRAVIS: Yeah, have you heard heard?
How long are they supposed to be here?
MATT: "Until they finish this f*cking
investigation. They keep bugging people for
"information, but they're all just clammed up and
not saying sh*t."
TRAVIS: At least you're by the tent, they've had
us walking the perimeter of the lake the entire
time.
MATT: "It's bullshit. I wish they would just go
ahead and execute them. That carnival master or
whatever and get it over with."
TRAVIS: Did they find anything inside, today? Tell
me, something interesting, please.
MATT: "They investigated the corpses and found
nothing yet. Still in there if you want to take a
look at it."
TRAVIS: Would you mind if we popped in?
MATT: "I mean I suppose so." Make a deception
check.
MARISHA: Something good, something good?
TALIESIN: No.
TRAVIS: Where is it? Jesus.
Oh! 13.
MATT: Okay. He thinks a second on it. "Oh I
suppose so. Go on in."
TRAVIS: We'll be quick, super fast.
MATT: "Please, get it over with." He stops you.
"If there's any way to expedite this, if you can
"pin it on any of them, we can just k*ll them and
take care of it. Let me know."
TRAVIS: Let's go.
(as Grog) That worked way better
than I thought. Like we should-- I mean--
(as Fjord) should we look around for stuff or what?
(laughter)
SAM: Yes. Yes.
LIAM: You are very good with voices.
TRAVIS: Well you know, I do a little mimicry here
and there. We should look, come on. Check the
grounds. Maybe we can find where the bodies are
laying.
LIAM: Yeah, let's have a look around.
MATT: You guys look inside, the tent is dark.
There's no light inside.
LIAM: I take a rag out of my side satchel and I
cast-- what the hell is it called because I've
only been a wizard for a short time-- one Dancing
Light underneath the rags so it's only dim.
MATT: All right, so you have this self-made hooded
lantern with the hood you have over it.
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: That's dope.
LIAM: What the f*ck are we looking for in here?
MATT: And Nott, you're going with them?
SAM: I'm with the girls.
TRAVS: Where did the bodies fall? Over there,
didn't they?
LIAM: That's right, yeah.
TRAVIS: Well let's search the grounds.
MATT: You make your way inside, the smell is
pretty bad. You can smell the flesh beginning to
decay.
TRAVIS: Have they moved the bodies or are the
bodies still there?
MATT: With a bit of looking, the bodies are still
there where they left them. They have not moved,
you can see a couple of remnants of notes and
sheets that have been crumpled, but the bodies
have been left where they are.
TRAVIS: Can we check the bodies for anything?
LIAM: Is there anything arcane? From all my
studies, does anything here ring any bell? I have
a photographic memory.
MATT: Go and make a religion check.
LIAM: All right. That is a ten.
MATT: Unfortunately, you don't have a lot of
research on the undead, or whatever might be the
essence of this creature's creation, and the more
you look at it, you're like, "This is not my
specialty."
LIAM: Okay. What about the perimeters of here,
where all the people were? There was a swarm of
people. I spend five minutes seeing anything was
dropped of interest.
MATT: Make an investigation check, both of you.
TRAVIS: That's better.
LIAM: I miss the twins.
TRAVIS: 16.
LIAM: Big ten.
MATT: Glancing about, you can see the track marks
of everyone fleeing. You can see the spatters of
blood. You can see the place where the
transformation occurred. There is a horrible
shedding of certain layers of flesh. You can see
previously existing layers of flesh and muscle
that were shed as whatever this undead thing was
fell to the ground. Once again, you make a
religion check as well.
TRAVIS: Okay. Roll high. I did not. Ten.
MATT: Yeah. This is not your specialty. You have
little experience with the undead and this type of
magic.
TRAVIS: We can't spend that long in here. Maybe we
just take a bit of it with us. Do you have a
pocket?
LIAM: I have many pockets, of course I have
pockets.
TRAVIS: Like a jar? I-I got no pockets!
SAM: You designed a character with no pockets?!
Why would you do that?
TRAVIS: There's no pockets! All right, but I'll
check.
LIAM: He's just in the Blue Man Group unitard and
that's it.
MARISHA: I'm sure Rob Liefeld just got a nosebleed
and he doesn't know why.
LIAM: So this dead thing is here in front of me?
MATT: Two of them. There's the main one, the
ground zero one, which is where you were putting
all your attention, and then there's the woman,
who was transformed as part of the first.
LIAM: I will take my dagger, and I will slice a
little bit off of the woman, and it's going to get
dark in here and I will snuff out the light and
use the rag to roll it up and I'll put the little
piece in my pack.
MATT: With a squishy sound you place it within
your pack.
LIAM: Let's get out of here, I'm going to be
sick.
TRAVIS: Agreed.
MATT: All right. The four of you, I need you to
roll stealth checks, please.
MARISHA: Not that one. I don't feel good about it.
Oh not bad! 21.
TALIESIN: 17.
LAURA: 18.
SAM: 25.
MATT: Without issue, you guys quickly dart around
the side of the tent and make your way right
towards the central area where the multitude of
tents to this back encampment is placed. There is
a single campfire. The embers are burning out. It
has not been kept up. You do see two crownsguard
who are currently keeping watch. One of them is
slumped in a chair across from the fire and is
nodding off. The other is doing a basic patrol and
looking around. Other than that, you don't hear
any sounds, you don't see anybody else. Just the
two crownsguard.
TALIESIN: Which of the tents is currently
occupied?
MATT: There are four main tents. There are two
very large ones, one of which generally contains
Toya and Kylre, the devil toad. That's on the
south side. There's the north largest tent, this
one contains the Knot sisters and Ornna. Then
there's a very small tent to the south side that
would be Bo the Breaker's tent, but he's not here.
Then there's a medium sized tent on the north
side. Who would be in that one?
TALIESIN: Toya and Kylre share a tent, that's
right. It would be Desmond.
MATT: Desmond would be the other one. It would be
Gustav staying there as well, but Gustav changes
between the tent and the cart.
MARISHA: The cart?
TALIESIN: We have a wagon.
LAURA: Molly, I have a question. What made you
guys set up your tent here?
TALIESIN: We were told to set it up here, if I
recall.
LAURA: In this specific area?
TALIESIN: That sounds right. If I recall, we were
specifically told to set up tent right here.
MARISHA: And it's by the lake, right?
MATT: Maybe 150-200 feet away from it.
MARISHA: That's pretty close to a lake.
LAURA: What if they set up their tent on a cursed
land or something?
MARISHA: It's the lake, it's common?
TALIESIN: What's the easiest tent to get to
without--
MATT: Do you want to go to the north side or the
south side of the main tent?
TALIESIN: I want to go with whatever's furthest
away from the guards.
SAM: Shouldn't we just go to the Toya tent?
MATT: The Toya tent's on the south side, that's
the opposite side, you guys would have probably
come in from the north end.
TALIESIN: What's the easiest to get to without--
MATT: That would be the one that contains Ornna
and the Knot sisters.
TALIESIN: I'm going to go back there and do our
traditional (bird call)
MATT: Okay. There's actually no response.
LAURA: (bird call)
MARISHA: I had Mona and Lena, but maybe it's
Lolie.
TALIESIN: Yuli. It's Mona and Yuli. I'm going to
try one of the other tents. Am I getting the sense
that any of them are in?
SAM: Look over here!
TALIESIN: Over here!
MATT: The other tent you get to and you make the
same sound? This would be the one that Desmond
usually is in, too. There's a pause, and then you
hear a very faint (bird call).
TALIESIN: I'm going to very gently lift the back
of the tent up and not go in through the front.
And just--
MATT: Okay. You glance inside and you can see,
leaning up from a bedroll, Desmond who is
half-awake, and glances over and sees you. He's
out of outfit, out of makeup, and he gives a nod.
TALIESIN: (whispering) Do you know what's going
on? (switches to normal volume) Assume we're
whispering, because this is bullshit.
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN: How is it? What's happened?
MATT: "They've come around asking a few questions,
we're trying to figure it out ourselves. Are you
"okay?"
TALIESIN: I could be worse.
MATT: "How's Gustav? And Bosun?"
TALIESIN: They couldn't be worse. And then Yasha
Yasha'd. I don't know. Did Toya see anything? Did
she say anything?
MATT: "We're still trying to figure this out
ourselves. Are you alone?"
TALIESIN: No, I've picked up a few scragglers.
They're idiots, but they're helping.
MATT: "Well bring them in."
SAM: We come in.
MATT: You guys all enter the tent and you see
Desmond. Previously you saw him in this very
colorful outfit with the frilled neck piece and
the full facial makeup. Now you see a man in his
late 30s with a very scarred left side of his
face. It looks like it was shredded at one point
in his youth, that the makeup hid during the
performance. As soon as you enter, even upon
greeting him, he has a very sad presence to him.
Even though you're all under the cover of night
and having this conspiratorial conversation, he
has this melancholy about him that permeates the
space inside the tent. He says, "So you're all the
ones that helped earlier. Thank you. It would have
"been far worse if you hadn't."
LAURA: No problem.
TALIESIN: What do they think happened? What are
they asking?
MATT: "They're thinking something about the show.
They're thinking Gustav made this happen. I don't
think it's Gustav, he's a good man. He makes poor
choices and it's plagued him his whole life, you
can see it in his brow. But good intentions have
grave consequences. No one that good comes out of
Shady Creek Run without some mistakes behind them,
but I don't see him doing this."
TALIESIN: What would be the point?
LAURA: Has it ever happened like this before?
MATT: "No."
LAURA: Anything weird ever happened before?
MATT: "Weird things? All the time. We're a bunch
of weird folk, work with a lot of weird people.
Bunch of strange freaks gathered to this show."
MARISHA: Was there anyone new here recently that
you haven't worked with a lot?
MATT: "Yeah, she apparently ran off."
TALIESIN: Yasha's the newest, but she can be
flighty.
MARISHA: What about Mona and Yuli?
MATT: "The sisters are bitter, but it's no fault
of theirs."
MARISHA: Why are they bitter?
MATT: "Because the world is cruel."
TALIESIN: You've never met it-- Well, nevermind.
MATT: "I wish I could help them, but it--"
MARISHA: (stutters) What happened to them?
LAURA: Are you drunk? What's going on?
MARISHA: No, I'm trying to hear and whisper at the
same time.
LAURA: You can talk at a normal volume.
MATT: Magical whisper. Cone of Whisper.
MARISHA: Matt Cone of Whisper!
TALIESIN: Oh God, that's a new thing now.
MARISHA: What did they say? Why do they think
that? Why is the world shitty?
MATT: "Have you been around? Have you travelled to
see anything?"
MARISHA: Yeah. Listen. The world has its own brand
of shitty depending on whose eyes are looking at
it, right? So what is their brand of shitty?
TALIESIN: Circus shitty.
MATT: "I don't know. Ask them."
MARISHA: Where are they?
TALIESIN: In a tent over there.
MATT: "They don't seem to take much of a liking to
me anyway, so I can't really tell you myself. I'm
"sorry."
SAM: They don't like you? Why?
MATT: "There's a lot of people that don't like
me."
LAURA: I like you, Desmond. I think you're great.
SAM: Why? What did you do?
MATT: He looks at you and goes, "Same reason folks
probably don't like you; you're different."
SAM: Hmm.
TALIESIN: Is everybody still here? They've not
taken anyone away other than--
MATT: "Other than those two, everyone else is
here. We're just keeping under watch until their
"investigation is complete."
MARISHA: Molly, why did you laugh when I asked
about the sisters?
TALIESIN: We're carnival people, we've all got our
issues. You don't end up here if you're not
a little weird.
LAURA: Can I try something? I want to try to cast
Detect Good and Evil.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: Cleric sh*t!
LAURA: Right?
SAM: On?
LAURA: On the area. It lasts up to ten minutes, so
it's within 30 feet of me.
TRAVIS: You ever cast this before?
LAURA: No.
TRAVIS, TALIESIN, and MARISHA: First cast!
TRAVIS and TALIESIN: First blood!
MATT: So you cast it. You concentrate. You reach
down and grasp the bottom of your symbol that
hangs around your belt, and there's a faint rush
of divine force given to your consciousness. You
don't sense within 30 feet of you any fiendish, or
celestial, or fey, or undead, or aberration.
LAURA: Nothing that's been desecrated?
MATT: Nothing from this tent or within 30 feet.
SAM: Does it follow her?
LAURA: Yeah, it follows me.
MATT: It's like a radial thing.
SAM: That's pretty cool, let's keep going then.
Maybe we'll see something?
LAURA: Yeah. Am I close to the edge of the main
tent?
MATT: There are two tents to the north. There's a
bigger one, and a medium one. The one that you're
in right now is the larger one to the north, and
as such contains-- Actually no. The one that you
guys are in right now is the medium one. The one
that contains Desmond. The larger one contains
both of the sisters and Ornna.
LAURA: Okay. And they're closer to the big tent?
Where is the big tent?
MATT: Correct. The big tent is about ten to 15
feet from the one you're in right now.
LAURA: Okay, cool. Yeah, let's leave. I'll get up
to the edge of the big tent, and I want to see if
I can feel anything weird in that area.
MATT: Okay. Is everyone else staying inside or are
you going with her?
SAM: We're going with, but before we leave I'll
ask Desmond: From one outcast to another, are
there any questions that are bugging you
about all this?
MATT: He thinks for a second. "I don't want this
all to fall on Gustav. He's done a lot of good for"
"all of us, and the way they're talking about the
investigation, they're looking to make a scapegoat"
"of this."
SAM: Well, thank you.
MATT: "Thank you."
SAM: (mimics bird call poorly) That's how they
talk to each other. That's how carnival folk talk
to each other.
TALIESIN: Oh, for f*ck's sake. I'm going to do my
best.
MATT: "Thank you."
TALIESIN: I'm going to quietly sneak out the back
of the tent again and sneak into the--
MATT: Another stealth check, my friends.
TALIESIN: Oh god, I hate all of this.
LAURA: I'm going to give Molly Blessing, so you
get advantage.
SAM: 21.
MARISHA: 13. Not great.
TALIESIN: 13.
MATT: With advantage?
TALIESIN: With advantage.
LAURA: 12.
MATT: Okay. You guys make your way up to the edge
of the tent.
TALIESIN: I'm not going to make the noise I'm just
going to--
MATT: Right. As you make your way over to the edge
of the tent where the sisters and Ornna are, you
focus and concentrate. Nothing, from the radial
thing. One of the guards, who's standing up and
making a patrol, looks over right as you duck
behind and you hear a "Huh?"
SAM: Uh oh.
LAURA: Quick, go in the tent.
TALIESIN: We're going to go in the tent.
LAURA: We all duck under the tent go and act like
we're sleeping.
MATT: You guys all dodge under the tent just as
the guard begins to pass around. You hear the
footsteps around. As you step in you watch as the
two Knot sisters--
TALIESIN: (shushes)
MATT: They both curl into a ball and stay really
quiet. All of the sudden Ornna comes to
consciousness and (light footsteps)
the footsteps finish the circle
and then go back towards where the fire is.
LAURA: That was close.
MATT: Ornna leans in, goes like, "Okay, what is
going on."
TALIESIN: That's what I'm trying to figure out,
what the f*ck is going on. They're with me, it's
been complicated. Gustav's in deep. Bosun's in
deep.
LAURA: Tell us you know something.
MATT: "What do you want to know?"
TALIESIN: What did you see? I don't know.
SAM: Who did this? What was it?
MATT: "I don't know. I looked and I saw what you
saw."
TALIESIN: This is Ornna I assume.
MATT: This is Ornna, yeah.
TALIESIN: Ornna is the fire dancer.
MARISHA: Right, okay.
TALIESIN: For f*ck's sake, they're going
to k*ll every last f*cking one of us unless
we figure this out.
MATT: She's like, "Right."
TALIESIN: What do you think?
MATT: "Well the sister's over here think it's a
hit job, but this isn't a hit job with zombies?
"Are you f*cking kidding me?"
TALIESIN: I don't know. I think that they're
trying to cover something.
MATT: "That's not surprising."
MARISHA: Can I insight check the sisters? What are
they doing right now?
MATT: They're both just quietly curled up and
watching you guys talk.
MARISHA: They're not saying anything, though?
MATT: Not yet. If you want to ask them something
you can.
MARISHA: Do they look nervous or are they just
being shifty?
MATT: Make an insight check to find out.
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: While she's doing that I'm going to try and
sneak out the underside of the tent to go to the
big tent.
SAM: I'll go with her.
MATT: This is a bit of a leap. This goes about 25,
30 feet south of where you are around the campfire
that's open.
SAM: No problem.
MATT: Go ahead and make your stealth checks,
guys.
TALIESIN: Oh god. I miss Pass Without a Trace so
much.
SAM: 23.
TALIESIN: That's a number.
LAURA: Nine.
MATT: Okay. What was your insight check?
MARISHA: 15.
MATT: 15. They both look nervous, but just
untrusting of the scenario. You can't read
anything deeper than that. There is definitely a,
hmm, but you can't quite get a full bead on them.
You guys, as you curl around the outside, there's
the one guard that's sitting in the chair by the
fire that goes like (snores) and opens his eyes a
little bit and looks over in your direction,
Jester, and there's a brief moment where he's just
looking right at you. Do you do anything?
LAURA: I freeze.
SAM: Oh god.
MATT: Stands up.
LAURA: Can I use-- oh sh*t. I'm going shitballs,
sh*t.
SAM: I'm just tucking around, getting ready.
MATT: You're around, you don't see anything.
SAM: I don't see this?
MATT: Sorry, he doesn't see you.
LAURA: I'm going to cast Charm Person on the guard
that sees me.
MATT: Okay. As he stands up, he goes toward you
and he goes for his blade and he has to make a
saving throw.
SAM: Oh boy.
MATT: Which he does not make. I don't think so,
it's like a six.
SAM: No, it's like 13 or something.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: So he goes like--
LAURA: Hi, I'm not here.
MATT: "Okay."
LAURA: Okay. Sit down. Go to sleep, this is a
dream.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
TALIESIN: That's so good.
LAURA: That's so close. This is so bad. Five.
MATT: He doesn't seem to buy the dream thing, but
he's like--
LAURA: You want it to be a dream.
MATT: He doesn't go to sleep but he knows
you're there and he's keeping an eye, but
he's not doing anything.
LAURA: Okay, well it's good enough, I guess.
MATT: But he's definitely aware that you're
there.
LAURA: I'm going to go towards the big tent just
so I can see if I can sense any evil.
MATT: Okay. Really quickly, just to check because
it's-- That's right, Charm Person is not--
LAURA: It's not, yes.
MATT: Okay. It's at this point that you turn your
attention to the tent and focus. There is a hefty,
radiating warm fiendish source from the inside of
that large tent.
SAM: We found something!
LAURA: I can sense something. Let's go in the
tent.
SAM: Go in? But if it's bad, that's bad.
LAURA: What if it's just a dead thing?
SAM: Oh god, will we have to fight a dead thing?
Should we get some help? I turn to Caleb's cat and
I say go! Go get Caleb! Shoo! (hiss) Go away!
(hiss) I can't speak Cat! Go away!
MATT: The cat goes, (angry meow).
SAM: Go away! Go tell Caleb we're here!
MATT: (hiss)
LIAM: Yes!
MATT: Turns around and sprays you and then keep
walking.
SAM: Okay, I've sent for help.
LAURA: Okay. Let's go under the tent.
SAM: All right, let's go.
MATT: You guys carefully maneuver under the tent.
As soon as you curl into the interior of the tent
you hear a very heavy (snoring).
LAURA: This the big tent that you guys were just
in?
SAM: No.
MATT: No, it's the one on the south side of it.
SAM: It's a different one.
LAURA: Oh!
MARISHA: Toad guy.
MATT: You see the slowly expanding and contracting
form of Kylre from the back side. You see this
giant, scaly, somewhat oily exterior of the body.
SAM: That's why you detected him, because he's a
fiend.
LAURA: Maybe he's a good fiend, can fiends be
good?
SAM: I don't know, you detected--
LAURA: Is he still sleeping?
MATT: (snoring)
LAURA: He's still sleeping.
SAM: We can wake him up and ask?
LAURA: And ask if he's good or bad?
SAM: Yeah?
LAURA and SAM: Eh.
SAM: Is anyone else in the tent?
MATT: Make a perception check.
SAM: One.
LAURA: Oh no, we suck at this.
LIAM: This? Everything!
LAURA: 17.
MATT: Okay, that's better. You just stare right at
the body of this toad going, "Nope."
SAM: This looks really big and scary.
MATT: You glance and see a faint bit of a whitish
material from the crook of the arm. You take a few
steps forward and glance from the side and you can
see asleep, cradled in his large, lizardman arms,
Toya, dwarf girl is curled up and asleep
peacefully.
SAM: We should talk to her, but if we wake her up
he's going to be mad. I guess we have no choice,
we should talk to her. She's a dwarf? Do you speak
Dwarvish?
LAURA: No, I don't.
SAM: Maybe she speaks Common. We'll be fine. She's
a circus person.
LIAM: I have that ability, it lets you know
exactly where the fiend is. Which of those
things is the fiend?
LAURA: Which of the things is the fiend?
MATT: It's the large source.
LAURA: It's definitely the large fiend.
LIAM: It could have easily been the little girl.
MATT: It could have been, yeah.
LAURA: It's the big guy.
SAM: Let's wake her up!
MATT: The radiance is around the large creature.
LAURA: And her name is Toya?
SAM: Toya. Singing dwarf.
LAURA: Let's sit down on the ground and look
non-threatening. So we sit down cross-legged. Just
casual. Like we're having a tea party.
SAM: Put down my hair.
LAURA: And then we go: Toya! Toya wake up!
SAM: Wakey wakey!
MATT: The breathing stops and there's this
stillness in the interior of the tent.
SAM: We should light a light or something?
Otherwise we're just in the dark.
MATT: You hear this faint sound of squeaking as
lubricated folds of lizardman flesh twist over
each other as the devil toad's head kind of curls
back to look at you quietly, the mouth slightly
ajar. You can see rows of teeth and this bit of
drool down the edge of the chin onto the ground.
"What. you. want?"
LAURA: We're here to talk to Toya.
MATT: At which point the little girl (yawn) begins
(grunt) (thumping) and rotates in his space. He
takes up almost the entirety of this tent. And
slowly rotates around inside. Surprisingly quiet
for his size. And still clutching Toya, Toya sits
up and is like "What's happening? (yawn)"
LAURA: Hi!
MATT: "Hi!"
SAM: Sorry to disturb your slumber.
MATT: She takes her braids and holds them with her
hands, it's almost a safety blanket she curls into
herself. She looks about 11 or 12. This close you
can see she looks younger than she did from that
distance. Whether it be the presence or the mature
voice. But she seems pretty young. But she's not
childlike.
LAURA: Oh hey! What's going on.
MATT: " Well?"
SAM: Do you recognize us from the other night?
Last night?
LAURA: Last night.
SAM: Last night?
MATT: "I don't remember, I got scared."
LAURA: It was scary. You have a really pretty
voice.
MATT: "Thank you."
LAURA: Did you notice how when you sang that a
dude turned into a zombie?
MATT: She begins to chuckle. And the big toad
(laughter). "I did. It was really scary! I didn't
"like it at all. I didn't do that, did I?"
LAURA: Probably not.
SAM: Has it happened before, or was that--
MATT: "No. The guards are saying I probably did
that, they're saying I might have done that." It's
interesting, you notice now listening to her, she
has this beautiful voice but her speaking voice is
very crackly. It sounds almost damaged.
LAURA: Do you sing all the time, Toya?
MATT: "I sing a lot. It's what keeps me alive,
it's what gets me money."
LAURA: Right. I understand that.
SAM: Was that the same song you always sing?
MATT: "Yeah. It's the one song I know."
SAM: Did it feel the same coming out of you or was
it different?
MATT: "It felt the same."
LAURA: What language is it?
MATT: "It's an old dwarven tune. My mother taught
it to me before she passed."
LAURA: What does it mean?
MATT: "It's a tale of the angels and how they came
from the realms beyond of the gods. They granted
"each to us our sparks of life."
LAURA: Granted sparks of life. Does that sound
like a familiar story that I've heard before?
MATT: It sounds vaguely religious, but--
SAM: When you were singing, did you hear any other
sounds or words that someone else was saying?
MATT: "No, not beyond the ordinary. Then I saw
that poor man just start tearing through people. I
"got scared and Kylre helped me." She puts her arm
up and pats and (grunt).
LAURA: How did you and Kylre meet?
MATT: "They brought me into the circus. I was up
in a city north of here, far north of the Marrow
"Valley and I was just on the streets singing. And
this carnival came by and I met Gustav and he
"invited me to join and that's how I met Kylre and
I met all these wonderful people."
SAM: Has anyone new come around and talked to
you?
MATT: "No."
SAM: Asked you to do anything? It's so strange.
LAURA: Man, we suck at this.
SAM: No, we're really good.
MATT: "The newest people we've had are Mollymauk
and Yasha."
LAURA: They're new?
MATT: "Comparatively. Mollymauk's been here almost
two years now."
LAURA: Oh. Okay.
MATT: "He came after I did. We both found our
voice together. I was very scared and he wasn't
"talking and together we helped each other learn to
have fun again."
SAM: And yesterday before the show you didn't
notice anything weird, anyone creeping around the
carnival, setting up anything?
MATT: "No."
SAM: Snooping around?
LAURA: Anybody in weird cloaks?
SAM: Cloaks, cloaks!
MATT: "I didn't see anything."
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: DM, on a minor note, I put my hand on
Fjord's shoulder and say I'm going to be blind for
a second, give me a little slap if anything goes
wrong. And I tune into Frumpkin who should still be--
MATT: At this point in time you notice (laughter)
Nott going "Shoo! Cah! Go find help!" and you hear
a (hiss) (grumpy meow). Yeah.
LIAM: And then Frumpkin takes off?
MATT: Frumpkin starts heading back around towards
you.
LIAM: So I'm looking at myself after a moment.
MATT: Briefly, as you keep concentrating, Frumpkin
finds his way under the tent and comes up to you.
SAM: Is there anyone you think would want to
destroy the carnival or hurt Gustav? Does Gustav
have any enemies?
MATT: "I hope not. I know him and Ornna argue a
lot, but--"
SAM: Him and Ornna? It's Ornna! Ornna's the one.
Thanks very much, we're out of here.
(laughter)
SAM: Hot lead!
LAURA: Let's go! We've got it, we've solved the
case!
TALIESIN: I'm going to have a tiny bit of
conversation with her.
MATT: Yeah. So while they're gone, the two of you
are in the other tent with the sisters and Ornna.
MARISHA: I would like to talk with the sisters
while that is going on.
MATT: They're both sitting there, knees tucked to
their chest.
MARISHA: I go and sit down next to them, putting
my knees up, too. This whole thing is really
messed up, right?
MATT: "Yeah, you're telling us."
MARISHA: Yeah. Man. Like, why would we do anything
like that? I feel like we're all being needlessly
persecuted.
MATT: "I'm sorry, who are you?"
MARISHA: Oh, sorry. I'm Beau. The other Bo, but I
helped fight the zombies the other night. I'm
under house arrest. We're under the same
situation, just separately. Not really. I don't
want to compare myself to you, because that would
be rude.
MATT: The two halfling twins look at each other,
and back at you.
TALIESIN: Her name's Beau. She's helping, she's
awful, you have a lot in common.
MATT: "Okay, well, I mean, whatever you want to
know."
MARISHA: He's such a d*ck. Why is he such a d*ck?
MATT: "Molly's great, why are you such a d*ck?"
TRAVIS: Reversal!
MARISHA: Oh, sorry, he's been talking sh*t about
you this whole time, I don't know, I just--
MATT: Make a deception check on that.
TRAVIS and LIAM: Oh.
LIAM: Stirring the pot.
MARISHA: It's okay. 15.
TALIESIN: I'm going to walk by the two twins,
because I'm circling the tent, trying to get a
look, and be like, I've absolutely been talking
sh*t. You're both terrible. I give them both a
kiss on the head and keep walking.
MATT: Okay. They both, "All right, so what are you
trying to do?"
MARISHA: What am I trying to do? I'm trying to
figure out who's behind all this so that we can
keep moving on with our lives.
MATT: "All right, well, get it over with. Soon as
this is done, we're out."
TALIESIN: They may not let us leave. They may be
k*lling us all.
MATT: "They're not going to k*ll us all!" The
other goes, "They're not going to k*ll us all."
TALIESIN: They're weird out there. They're very
weird out there.
MATT: (sighs)
MARISHA: Your guys' performance was amazing, by
the way.
MATT: "Thanks."
MARISHA: I loved it.
SAM: We're stealthing over to that tent, by the
way.
LAURA: I thought we were stealthing over to the
main tent.
SAM: The one with Ornna in it.
TALIESIN: Ornna's in the tent with us.
MATT: Oh, you guys are going to the main tent.
LAURA: I wanted to get to the main tent to see if
I could sense any evil in the big, main tent.
SAM: Oh, you want to swoop by the main tent?
LAURA: But if it's really far away.
MATT: Not too far away from where you were,
because you're backing out the side of it. So you
can go ahead and stealth around. Make a stealth
check.
LAURA: Oh, god. Please no one, please no whammies.
TALIESIN and LAURA: Big money.
SAM: I'm fine.
LAURA: Natural 20!
MATT: Nice, and what did you get?
SAM: 22.
MATT: The two of you, without issue, make your way
around towards the large tent without being seen.
SAM: Any evil?
LAURA: I'm sensing it.
MATT: Nothing.
SAM: g*dd*mn it.
LAURA: No f*cking evil!
SAM: It's Ornna! We know who it is! We know who
the k*ller is!
TALIESIN: While you're talking to the twins, I'll
be talking to Ornna. Oh, for f*ck's sake.
MATT: "To be honest, if it's any easier, it's
probably Gustav."
TALIESIN: It's not f*cking Gustav.
MATT: "It probably is, you shut up. He's a prick,
he doesn't know what he's doing, he's going to run
this whole carnival into the ground. I don't want
to take the fall for it, we all get away on this.
MARISHA: No!
TRAVIS: Little feet.
LIAM: (snarling noises)
TRAVIS: Eats and shoots the same way. (snarls)
MARISHA: So wait, it's probably Gustav? What makes
you say that?
MATT: "Because he's in prison, he's the leader,
he's f*cked this whole thing by letting this
happen."
MARISHA: Oh. Wow. You have interesting
perspectives. Hey, weird question, how do you guys
come up with your acts? Is that something that you
guys create yourselves, or do you guys workshop it?
TALIESIN: It's like she's never experienced
boredom. It's very weird.
MATT: "Yeah. It's impressive."
TALIESIN: Hey, Ornna?
MATT: Ornna goes, "Yes?"
TALIESIN: (sighs) I mean, I know your feelings on
all this. What do you think?
MATT: (sighs) "I'd say Bosun's a stand up guy, if
a bit of a self-absorbed d*ck at times. And we all
"knew Gustav was going to sh*t the bed sooner or
later, I mean, this is his karma. I just don't
"know how, or why, but I can guarantee you, if this
was my carnival, this sh*t wouldn't have happened.
TALIESIN: Really?
MATT: "Mm-hmm."
TALIESIN: What exactly would you have done?
MATT: "Well, first off, I would have made sure
that we had better support from the guard before
this all happened so nobody else got k*lled."
TALIESIN: They were useless.
MATT: "Secondly, I would have made sure that there
weren't any old folks that made it in to f*cking
turn into sh*t."
TALIESIN: Well, that's on me and-- That's on me.
MATT: "I don't know."
MARISHA: You feel the same way, Knot sisters? Feel
like this is karma on Gustav?
TALIESIN: They would.
MATT: At which point, the flap of the tent opens
up and it's Jester.
LAURA: It's Ornna!
SAM: Ornna, you have a lot of explaining to do!
MARISHA: Shut up!
SAM: You have a lot of explaining to do!
MARISHA: Shut up!
SAM: We've talked to Toya. She knows it's you who
did this!
LAURA: We know you guys are in a fight all the
time.
SAM: You're the one behind the whole plot! You did
it!
LAURA: You!
MATT: The two Knot sisters immediately go, "Ornna?
Is it you? Did you k*ll that guy?" Ornna's like,
"I don't know what you're talking about. What the
f*ck is this? Who the f*ck are you!"
LAURA: Why did you turn that guy into a zombie?
SAM: Who do you work for!
TALIESIN: Ornna, Ornna.
MARISHA: Insight check on the Knot sisters!
MATT: Go for it.
SAM: They've got n*zi in their name!
MARISHA: What?!
SAM: Knot seesters.
MARISHA: Natural 20!
[all exclaiming]
LIAM: Whispers!
LAURA: The first whisper!
MARISHA: Give me that sweet whisper!
SAM: Guys, I don't know about you. But my stats
are so neat because of D&D Beyond tonight.
LIAM: There's no pencil smudges.
SAM: No, I know right now I've got 14 of 15 hit
points.
TRAVIS: It opens, it closes, you can see your
spells when you need to see them without
flipping.
TALIESIN: I've got a little iPad button on the
back of my pen, it's quite nice.
SAM: Start talking, or this gnome-- nope! Goblin!
Starts biting.
MATT: Ornna goes, "To be perfectly honest, I have
no idea what's going on. Y'all just came in here,
started throwing accusations at me. Gustav got
arrested. Bosun got arrested. Molly got
arrested, I'm glad you got off that. But to be
perfectly honest, this whole thing's a sh*t show.
And the circus is probably not going to be the
same after this."
LAURA: Insight check on the--
MATT: Insight check on Ornna.
LIAM: My cat is on patrol because we've been
standing with our dicks in our hands for a long
time.
MATT: Yeah, I'm sorry.
LIAM: No! I'm not complaining, but I would have
sent the cat out.
LAURA: Seven.
MATT: Kind of hard to read. She seems genuinely
frustrated and caught off guard by this.
LAURA: I think she's telling the truth.
TALIESIN: Ornna, you might as well come clean,
this is classic you.
MATT: She looks at you. "Molly."
TALIESIN: I'm just trying to--
MATT: "f*ck you."
TALIESIN: Oh, f*ck you, too. It's no secret that
Ornna and Gustav have their differences, but this
ridiculous. I mean, she knows damn well that half
the circus would leave if he got f*cking arrested
and died.
MATT: "You're for real worried about this? You
really think who it could be? Let's play. Gustav:
he's an idiot. But he's not a m*rder*r. Bosun: bit
of a d*ck. But he's a stand up fella. Toya:
absolute doll. Couldn't hurt a fly. Mona and Yuli:
They're c**ts. But they're not going to k*ll
anyone. Desmond's a weird fellow. There's
something dark in his past; you can see it in his
melancholy.
TALIESIN: But this is not his style.
SAM: It's Desmond. Let's go to his tent!
TALIESIN: I just grab--
MATT: "There's some untrustworthy intelligence in
those lizard eyes of that devil."
LAURA: I did get a very evil kind of vibe off
him.
TALIESIN: What do you mean evil kind of vibe?
LAURA: Well, I mean, he's a fiend.
TALIESIN: He's what?
LAURA: The devil toad guy. He's a fiend.
TALIESIN: That's just a name. It's not actually,
like real thing. That just--
[stammering]
LAURA: You guys know he's a fiend, right?
MATT: There's this moment of silence, like, "He's
supposed to be lizardfolk."
TALIESIN: What do you--
SAM: It's the lizard man!
TALIESIN: I grab and push you down into the ground
and hold you. (shushing sounds) Not yet.
SAM: We're cracking this case wide open.
MATT: You guys, what are you doing?
LIAM: I mean, just because we're standing here so
long, I would have been nervous and again held on
to this guy's big bicep and sent the cat out.
TRAVIS: Why are you going all catatonic on me?
MATT: (laughs) Nice. As the cat darts under the
tent and makes its way through, you glance over to
the fire and sees a large dark shape step out from
one of the tents and you watch as one of the
guards who's sitting in the chair stands up and
crumples onto the ground without a sound. You see
the other guard look over, go over and run up to him
and start to check on him. You guys hear a voice
in the back start saying, "Damon? Damon?"
MARISHA: Just a guard. One of the guards.
LIAM: Fjord, something bad is happening.
MATT: You watch as the dark figure spins and two
flashes of red in the shadow nearby and you watch
as the other guard suddenly grabs his head and
grasps at his chest and falls on his back as his
legs curl up.
MARISHA: What the f*ck!
LIAM: Do I know where in relation to Fjord and I
this is?
MATT: It is to the east of you, about 150 feet.
TRAVIS: Can you talk to me when you're looking
through the cat?
LIAM: I can talk, but I can't hear anything when
I'm doing this.
MATT: Correct. You watch as the shadow bounds like
a giant frog--
LIAM: The frog is on the move. Frog is on the
move.
MATT: --northward.
LIAM: Away from us? But I don't know where the
others are.
MATT: You guys hear the name calling, and then
silence once more.
LAURA: (whispers) Can we peek outside of the tent
and see what's going on?
MATT: You guys go ahead and you look just as the
guard on the ground is like (gurgling) and just
stops moving. You see all the veins bulging.
MARISHA: I run up to the guard and check his
pulse. Is he still alive or is he paralyzed?
MATT: As you come out of the tent, you watch as
the flesh on his neck and throat splits and a very
familiar transformation begins to take place as
both of the guards begin to (growling).
LAURA: Oh no. We have to fight them.
MARISHA: Yeah, but get under the tent! We can get
the drop!
LIAM: I come out of it and I-- Zombies. I start
running towards the tent that I saw Jester peek
out from under.
MATT: As you guys rush underneath the big blue
tent, you watch as the two guards that are quickly
bulging and mutating, bits of their flesh
dislodging from their body and falling. You watch
now, up close, similar to the last time, but now
that you are looking intently for this, you can
see where there should be blood, it's almost like
dust and sand begin to spill from the wounds.
Something you had noticed a little bit in the body
of the old man before, but you didn't know if it
was decomposition or just general dirt.
TALIESIN: Girls, we're not supposed to be here.
Can you help us handle this?
MATT: You watch as the two halflings are like,
"f*ck no!"
TALIESIN: (sighs) We'll do what we can. If
something goes wrong, nudity usually works.
[laughing]
MATT: The two mutated guards now, their armor
bulging and broken in places, turn to the noises
in the tent where you guys are.
SAM: Are we in the same tent or are we in two
different tents?
MATT: You guys are all in one tent with the other
girls. You are all jammed into the space. The two
of you make your way outside of the large tent as
you watch these two bulging, zombified creatures
making their way towards the tent. And that's
where we're going to pick up next time.
(groaning)
SAM: b*stard!
MATT: Because it is 11 now.
TRAVIS: But we're not supposed to be there! We're
gonna get framed for it!
MARISHA: Exactly, we can't get framed!
SAM: Can I just say, Laura and I busted the case
wide open!
(laughter)
TRAVIS: That is true!
SAM: We solved the case. Easy.
LAURA: Totally.
TALIESIN: Which one's Nancy, which one's Drew?
SAM: Couple inquisitions. Couple little, uh--
Following the clues.
LAURA: That's right.
TALIESIN: Just one more question.
TRAVIS: When that demon frog leapt, how high and
how far, approximately, did it look like it went?
MATT: It looks like it leapt about 20 to 25 feet
in the air and traveled about 40 feet with the
leap. It was a large arc.
LAURA: So we definitely can't fight that thing.
TRAVIS: Sure we can.
LAURA: Oh my god.
TRAVIS: Oh god.
MATT: You saw it escape northward from where you
are.
MARISHA: And did it look like the same figure?
MATT: Yasha ran north, northeast. This is just
straight north of where you are.
Towards the Ustaloch.
MARISHA: Towards Ustaloch! It's the f*cking lake!
[crosstalk]
TRAVIS: Oh man, this is good, dude!
MARISHA: See, here's my thing. Does anyone else
notice that the zombie transformations seem like a
serpent shedding its skin? Because they always
slough off their skin?
TRAVIS: It's also done without any contact.
MARISHA: Wait, what?
TRAVIS: It's done without any contact. He never
touches him.
LAURA: Yeah, he touched him, didn't he?
MATT: No.
LAURA: I thought he did.
MATT: No, they just suddenly began to erupt in--
LAURA: Hey, bonus news, though. The charm spell
guy isn't going to turn me dead!
MATT: Look at that silver lining!
TALIESIN: This season got dark. Season got dark.
LAURA: Whoa. Tight tight tight tight.
TRAVIS: Good sh*t. Little damaged voice, f*ck
yeah.
MATT: That'll be fun.
LAURA: I wanted to cough for her.
MATT: We'll pick up there next week. The chase is
on, apparently. Thank you guys so much for being
awesome. Thank you guys for coming along and
watching with us. We'll pick this up next Thursday
where we left off, right in the middle of this
campsite. Until then, have a wonderful week. See
you guys then. And, is it Thursday yet?
Goodnight.
[no audio]
♫
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09x02 - A Show of Scrutiny
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American web series in which a group of professional voice actors play Dungeons & Dragons.
American web series in which a group of professional voice actors play Dungeons & Dragons.