10x14 - Prisoner of Love

[bunniefuu]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪

♪ Ready to race to you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪

♪ There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪

♪ It feels so right it can't be wrong ♪

♪ Rocking and rolling all week long ♪

[organ solo plays over rhythmic hand claps]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ Saturday, what a day ♪

♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours ♪

♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪

You're gonna be real proud of me.

I just finished this valve job, and it's
smooth as Smokey Robinson's falsetto.

You know, I think that's very neat, Tommy, very neat.

The only thing is, Mr. Bartman brought this in for shocks.

Shocks?

Oh, Fonz, I'm sorry, man.

All right, all right, don't worry about
it, don't worry about it.

We're all very frazzled here.

Listen, I think I solved a problem.

I hired another mechanic.

He's a convict.

He's on a work release program.

What, are you crazy?

Hey, this is a cash business, you know?

I'm not crazy, I'm grateful.

If it wasn't for people helping me,
I might be in his shoes, right?

I want him to see that the world is filled with
some people that want to give him a second chance.

All right, Jailbird, inside.

Put it in there, front and center.

Shape up.

Oh, when I tell you to move, you move it.

What are you doing here?

I work here, with me.

Everybody's got an alibi.

What is with you, Kirk?

Got someone steal a little ball out of your whistle?

Hey, Tommy, Kirk's here, guard the office.

Yeah, you got it.

Arthur, I'm here with a convict you ordered.

No kidding, I didn't know you delivered.

Next time, I'll order a sandwich, too.

How you doing, Jim?

How's everything?

Trip okay?

Not bad, considering I'm with him.

I will once again review the rules of this
work release program.

I know the rules, sir.

Look, I'm the copier fellow, and a good one.

I'll say the rules if I want to.

Each weekday morning, you will leave the
county jail and report here for work.

At night, you'll return to the county jail
in time for lockup.

Lockup.

Lockup.

I love that phrase.

Lockup.

The phrase I love is, get out of here.

If you were my son, I'd put you over my
knee and spank you with my .45.

If you were my father, I'd take my mother
in for a sobriety test.

Warm guy.

Don't worry about him.

It happened during the w*r.

A grenade went off in his helmet.

Call me.

Listen, the important thing is, you got six weeks, right?

Tommy and I help you.

You're off parole early, all right?

Right.

Okay.

Look, I appreciate you doing this, but
everybody says it's just a waste of time.

All right, give me a hint.

Who is everybody?

Every one of my cell blocks.

Oh, great.

Now you listen to guys that dig tunnels
with little teaspoons, right?

I believe in you.

You follow two rules around here, you do all right.

Self-confidence.

Believe in yourself, and you put the tools
back where you find them.

You really think it's as easy as all that?

Of course.

It is.

There's a little painted outline for each tool.

This is my favorite.

It looks like a whale, huh?

Isn't that cute?

I love that.

I'm sorry, people, but I am not
auditioning for the student review.

I've got to save my voice for my husband.

I've got to save him something.

Jenny, if we do this number, you get to wear
the slinkiest dress in front of the whole school.

Hit it.

Stop.

In the name of love, before you break my heart.

Baby, baby, I'm aware of where you go.

Each time you leave my door, I watch you
walking down the street.

Yeah, this is it.

Oh, what a great place.

I own half this joint, huh?

This time before you run to her.

I hope it's the half that sings.

Hey, you want to meet him?

Sure.

I'll give my name, but not my address.

I could dig it, I could dig it.

Let's take a load off.

Stop in the name of love, before you break my heart.

Stop in the name of love, before you break my heart.

Take it all over, take it all over.

Stop in the name of love.

Love, before you break my heart,
think it all over, think it all over, stop!

Very nice ladies, very nice, this is Jenny, K.C.

and Julie, this is Jim, my new mechanic.

Hi.

You're going to conversate now while I get
our lunch, you ready?

Uh, yeah, don't worry about it, if you can't
think of anything great to say, talk about me.

Yeah, come on, come on.

So, what do you girls do for fun around here?

Well, when there's a man around... We like to sing.

Yeah, you guys are the best singers I've
seen in three to five years.

Oh, thank you.

All right, let's get back to the garage here.

Hey, how's the food with your stain?

Awful.

That's good, this won't be a shock to your sister.

Nice meeting you.

Likewise.

Okay, girls, here we go, one more time.

And one.

Two.

Three.

K.C.

K.C.

Do my eyes deceive me, or has Dr. Cupid
just given you a shot of carnal desire?

He was kind of cute.

Oh, but he wouldn't be interested in me, would he?

Oh, K.C., this is so simple.

There's absolutely not...

K.C., would you get in here?

Oh, Jenny, I just don't know if I can ask Jim out.

My heart keeps saying, yes, my brain keeps saying, no.

Which organ should I listen to?

Sweetheart, if we had time, I'd run an upper GI.

Now, listen, go for it.

K.C.

Hi.

Hi.

Well, what brings you to Greaseland?

Greaseland?

Well, I thought that I forgot.

Isn't it funny how you can just go someplace
and then... just forget why you came?

Yeah.

Yeah, that happened to me once at a cattle show.

Uh,

if you're looking for Fonzie or Tommy,
they'll be back in a few minutes.

Well, I wasn't looking for them.

I came here to see you.

Me?

Uh-huh.

Oh, me?

Uh-huh.

Well, uh, if I knew you were coming,
I'd have put on my fancy overalls.

Ha, ha.

I should have stuck with Greaseland.

I was wondering if you might be free for
dinner tomorrow night.

Don't I wish.

But I have to be someplace later.

Can't you get out of it?

I don't think so.

I'm kind of locked in.

We'll eat early.

Okay.

Okay, I'd love to.

But there's something I gotta tell you about myself.

You see, I...

What I mean is I...

I just filled this guy's radiator with oil.

This has been a wonderful meal.

I can't remember the last time I've had such a good meal.

Homemade bread, roast beef, knives.

Oh, it's been such a pleasure for us, Jim, having you here.

You are the first young man Casey has brought home.

Mary.

Yes, please.

Oh.

Well, thank you, Jim, but that's really not necessary.

Oh, it's my pleasure.

And you look beautiful tonight.

Well, thank you again.

So, uh, tell me, Jim, what did you do
before you went to work for Fonzie?

I was... I was self-employed.

Good, Marion, you've still got your napkin on your lap.

Oh, excuse me, I'll go fix the coffee.

Oh.

You're ahead three to two.

Hey, I really appreciate it, Mrs. C., but this is
like too small to heat up my apartment, huh?

Oh, Mr. Arthur, guess who Casey brought home for dinner?

That Jim Walker.

Hey, my Jim Walker.

Yeah, well, he's got like a special
project with me, you know.

Oh, hello, Fonz.

Hey.

Howard, Arthur says that Jim is a special project of his.

Oh.

You know, like a paper drive.

Not exactly a paper drive.

He's a convict on a work release program.

A convict?

Yeah.

As in convict?

Yeah, C-O-N.

But did you know that he's planned?

He's planning to take K.C.

out?

No, I just introduced him, but that's more
potatoes to what you guys are doing.

A convict?

Yeah.

I mean, isn't he great?

One day he's eating cornflakes with crooks.

The next day he's having roast beef with the C's.

Only in America, you know?

I can't believe it.

Your cup runneth over with the milk of
human contentedness, you know that?

I mean, I'll go further.

I think your faces should be smashed into
Mount Rushmore, you know?

Along with Lincoln, the Roosevelt Brothers.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Marion, what are we going to do?

Her parents entrusted her safety to us.

And there she is, sitting in the dining
room with the bird man from Alcatraz.

Well, Howard, perhaps Arthur's right.

We've always been so open-minded and accepting before.

Maybe we should be this time, too.

Yeah, we will.

We will, Marion.

But first we've got to get that criminal out of our house.

Uh...

The coffee is broken.

Well, I'm afraid I'm going to have to take
a rain check on the coffee.

See, I've got to turn in early.

Oh, it was just lovely spending the evening with you.

Well, maybe we can get together tomorrow at Arnold's.

Oh, that would be wonderful.

How about around 5 O'clock?



And thank you all again for having me over for dinner.

Okay, bye.

Bye.

Isn't he just the sweetest thing?

It doesn't matter, because you're never
going to see him again.

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artist, a singer, a dancer, start a business, be an
inventor, start a non-profit, or just get a better job.

Well, would somebody please tell me why I
cannot see that boy again?

Well, K.C., now, your Uncle Howard and I think
that Jim is just a little bit older for you, and he's, uh...

He's a convicted criminal.

A what?

A jailbird, a con, in a slammer, up the river, in
the big house... We can... That's a picture, Marion.

That can't be.

He had such nice manners, and an honest little face.

Oh, really?

Yeah, I hear they say that Jack the Ripper
used to serve a lovely brunch.

Now, K.C., we're just doing what your
parents would do if they were here.

What?

Treating me like a prisoner?

Well, maybe if I just go do the dishes,
I'll get a little time off for good behavior.

Oh, she's certainly... I know you was upset, but,
you know, getting involved with a convict should be

left up to persons who are more mature or experienced.

You're right, Marion, like the parole boy.

Or Jenny Piccolo.

Oh, hi, K.C.

Tell me everything.

Oh, Jenny, I just found out something awful about Jim.

Oh, do tell.

Jenny, he is a convict.

Oh, it's just like a sleazy novel.

It just doesn't seem fair.

The very first guy I fall for happens to be a criminal.

Oh, sister, sit down.

When you're hitchhiking down that highway of
love, you've got to be prepared for a bumpy ride.

But he's so sweet.

I just can hardly believe that he is a criminal.

Well, maybe it's a case of mistaken identity.

Or maybe he was framed.

Or maybe he's a movie star preparing for a part.

Like when Jerry Lewis talked.

Or at that college before he did The Nutty Professor.

Jenny, this is serious.

Oh, you're right.

Oh, if I could just go to Arnold's and
just get to the bottom of this.

But, look, Howard says I can't see him again.

K.C., you have got so much to learn.

Now, listen, of course you can't see him again.

But say you just happen to pop by Arnold's one day
and by some stroke of fate Jim just happens to be there.

That wouldn't be a date, would it?

Of course not.

And do me a favor.

See if Jim's got a date for me.

But please, no pickpockets.

I like to know when a man is touching me.

Hi, what a coincidence.

K.C., I was afraid you weren't coming.

Look, I got a great idea.

What do you say we go bowling?

Now?

What's the harm?

Let's just sit down and get to know each
other a little bit first.

Okay.

Good.

I'll start.

I'm 17, and I love to cook, and I collect
thimbles from around the world.

So what about you?

I grew up in Oregon.

I got two older brothers, and you found
out about me, didn't you?

About what?

You found out about me being a convict.

Oh, that?

Oh, well, I heard something along those lines.

Does it bother you?

Heavens no.

Why should that bother me?

You just probably did something silly like
jaywalking or littering, right?

No, armed robbery.

But you were just driving the getaway car.

No, I held up a liquor store.

Only to pay for your mother's operation.

My mother hasn't been sick a day in her life.

Any history of illness in your family at all?

Look, I made a mistake, and I'm serving my time.

Now, come on, if we don't hurry, we'll never get a Lane.

It's league night.

I can't.

I just remembered that I have a paper to do for homeroom.

I don't suppose this has anything to do
with me being a con.

No, we write papers for homeroom all the time.

Fonzie said people would forgive and forget.

But they don't.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

It was just that I was shocked.

And if you'll just give me a little bit of
time, maybe I can...

Don't worry about it.

Don't worry about it.

It's not your problem.

You see, no matter what I do, people are
going to treat me like a criminal.

So if that's what they want, that's what
I'm going to give them.

Oh, it's going to be a chilly one out
there, but I am prepared now.

I'll tell you.

Oh, it's fine.

Something awful just happened to Jim.

What happened to Jim?

What happened?

What are you talking about?

I sat here, Fonz.

I sat right here, and I tried to pretend
that him being a convict didn't bother me.

Yeah?

And it bothered me.

Yeah?

Oh, and then he rushed out of here.

He was so upset.

It was all my fault.

He's going to do something desperate, Fonz.

I know it.

All right, all right, all right.

Now, normally, I would sit here,
talk to you, make your legs better.

But right now, I'm going to take care of Jim.

Just do me a favor.

Will you take this to my apartment,
plug it in, turn it up to dark?

Understand, I got to do this, don't you?

Hey, if you want to toss your life out the window, after

everything Fonz has done for
you, I'm not going to sit in your way.

Hey.

Oh, what are you doing?

What's wrong with you?

Not you, him.

I'm robbing you.

See, I'm a thief, and this is what I do for a living.

Oh, that's great.

You're trying to make me look bad, is that it?

I got a lot invested in this work release
program, you know?

You?

I'm the one going to prison.

Hey, you gave me your job, and now you're
trying to rip us off.

Are you finished?

Mm-hmm.

Let me tell you something.

You make a mistake, you gotta pay for it.

You gotta work triple time to make people
trust you again, you know?

But it's worth it.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

Great.

Great.

When I first came in here, you said
everything was gonna be just fine,

and I told you it wouldn't work out.

All right, so maybe I painted too rosy a picture.

But if the weatherman tells me it's gonna
be sunny and it rains, I don't punch him out.

Right, Tommy?

Ow!

Hey, save that tape.

I think my lips are on it.

Will you stick to the subject?

Yeah, right, Fonz.

Hey, Jim, you got your entire future ahead of you, man.

Look, I don't want to hear any more pet f*ck.

I'm a crook.

That's the way it is.

No, you're a jerk.

Hold it.

I will take care of this, all right?

You're a jerk.

Why?

Because I don't believe you?

Hey, that's one very good reason.

Number two is, when you open that drawer,
you trip the silent alarm.

All right, we've got the place surrounded.

Whoever you are, we have your mother out here.

Hey, wait, Fonzie.

Take a ride.

Whoa!

Get over here.

Fonzie, the cops are here.

Not over here.

Work on the bike, will you?

I got to you guys.

You want to cry in front of other men.

I'm giving you ten seconds to come out.

One, Mississippi.

Two, Mississippi.

Three, Mississippi.

Will you get in here now?

All right, please.

Lights it, rays it.

Hey, Kirk, you need a bullhorn like Henry
Ford needs another Edsel.

Knock it off, Fonzarelli.

I'm here on official business.

Your burglar alarm went off.

Well, there must have been a power surge,
because I don't see a burglar in here, do you?

Hey, Jim, you see a burglar?

I said, Jim, do you see a burglar?

No.

No, I don't see any burglars either.

I guess somebody just got their wires crossed.

All right, but this won't be a total loss, because
you're never going to make it back in time for lockup.

He loves that phrase.

And that means one less g*n on the streets.

I love my job.

Vote for something.

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You didn't have to do that.

You could have turned me in.

What, the Captain Pinhead?

No.

Let me tell you something, all right?

It ain't easy for a con to go straight,
but you got the guts.

I got a place for you.

Otherwise, take off, be my guest.

Give you 85 bucks for a ride back to jail.

Hey, that's a deal.

You think we're making it time?

On my bike?

Hey, you start singing Camp Town Racers
now, you'll be singing Duda in your... Cell, let's go.

Guys?

Hey, there's a mouse in here!

Oh, Fonz, come on, please!

Goodbye, gray sky, hello, blue.

There's nothing can hold me when I hold you.

It feels so right, it can't be wrong.

Rockin' and rollin' all week long.

These days are ours.

Happy and free.

Oh, happy days.

These days are ours.

Share them with me.

Oh, baby.

These happy days are yours.

Goodbye.

These happy days are yours.

Next up, I Dream of Jeannie.

Days.