10x08 - Such a Nice Girl

[bunniefuu]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪

♪ Ready to race to you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪

♪ There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪

♪ It feels so right it can't be wrong ♪

♪ Rocking and rolling all week long ♪

[organ solo plays over rhythmic hand claps]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ Saturday, what a day ♪

♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours ♪

♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪

Hey, Marion.

Marion, it's almost 7.30, if we hurry, I can get
in a practice game, trying to shake this slump I'm in.

Oh, Howard, you know, I don't think my
bowling bag is going to last another season.

Oh, come on, you say that every year.

See, I told you.

This.

Bowling bag was your mother's, but I want a new one.

Yeah, uh, you're right, sweetheart,
you can't bowl with bad equipment.

I'll tell you what, you can have my bag
and I'll, I'll get a new one.

Oh, all right, that's just fine, Howard, and you
can fix your own breakfast for the rest of your life.

Okay, Marion, you can have a new bowling
bag, I'll get a new ball.

Come in.

Come in.

Hi.

Casey.

Casey, you don't have to knock, you live here now.

Well, the last time I barged in here, you
and Aunt Marion were, were being affectionate.

You better get used to that because we
happen to be a very affectionate couple.

Not tonight, Howard.

Oh, Casey, come here, dear.

I left some cold chicken for you in the refrigerator.

Thank you.

Uncle Howard, I know you're gonna come out
of that nasty bowling salon.

Spread it all over town, why don't you?

Howard, she's family.

You know, Howard, have you noticed how every weekend
we go out and Casey stays home alone doing nothing?

What do you mean nothing?

Nothing.

Last Saturday night, she ironed all my shirts.

Exactly.

Here, sweetheart, meet me out in the car
and I'm gonna have a little talk with her.

Now?

Oh, there goes my practice game.

Now I gotta bowl cold again tonight.

Now, don't kid yourself, Howard.

Cold or hot, you're not gonna break 150.

You just blew a new bowling bag, Marion.

I know it, I know it.

Casey.

Right here.

Casey, you're not staying home tonight
just to iron Uncle Howard's shirts?

Oh, heavens no.

Tonight I'm baking bread.

Oh.

Casey, we appreciate all these things you do for us.

Uncle Howard loves those fishing lures you made for him.

But, Casey, dear, sweetheart, you're 17 years old.

It's time you started dating.

Oh, Aunt Marion, I couldn't do that.

Oh, I wouldn't know the first thing about dating.

See, at girls' school, we never were
allowed to be alone with a boy.

But what would I do if one tried to kiss me?

Oh, Casey, boys are nothing to be afraid of.

Oh, gosh, I remember my first date.

Lyle Spedding took me to a church picnic.

Oh, and I wanted to look really special.

You know, I got this long fall, which I
wore up in a bun on the top of my head.

You know, I look kind of like Mary Astern
across the Pacific.

Well, when the time came to open up our
box lunches, I was so nervous.

And when I looked down into mine, the
fall took a header into the potato salad.

How awful for you.

No, Lyle had my fall dry-cleaned, and we
spent the most wonderful summer together.

So, the next time... a nice boy
asks you out, you just go for it.

Just go for it, huh?

Oh, wait a minute, I can't.

Now, Tracy, dear, I can't promise you that
this first date is going to be perfect.

You know, but you would be so foolish to
miss out on all that fun and going out.

You know, life is a parade, and you're
walking in back of the elephant.

So, just for your own good, dear,
you should just please give it a try.

Oh, I'll give it a try.

Good.

Aunt Marion, I want to thank you so much.

My mother would have appreciated this
little conversation we had.

Oh, that's so sweet of you, dear.

I'm sure your mother doesn't need any advice from me.

Tell me about it.

Hey, Mama, don't you treat me wrong.

Come and love it, darling.

Attention, everybody, attention.

Are.

You tired of stock car races and vandalism?

Well, Arnold is going to take care of you.

So, just remember, this Saturday night, is our
first annual Arnold's Gala Costume Extravaganza.

We're going to have big prizes.

We got a great band with a great paper.

We're going to have some kind of fun.

You get to dress up silly.

I get a new freezer.

And tickets are only $5.

Oh, my God.

This is not going to be some little sock hop.

I'm even springing for a mirror ball.

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.

All right, there's K.C.

over there.

Go ahead.

Well, you going to ask her out or not?

I can't.

Just look at her.

She's so beautiful.

I've been taking her shoes off in my mind.

You going to ask her out?

Just thinking about it makes me dizzy.

It's no use.

I've been turned down more times than the
sheets at the Holiday Inn.

K.C.'s different, man.

I mean...

She's new and down.

Yeah, but she doesn't know you.

Oh, yeah.

That's right.

She doesn't know me.

Hey, here, Tommy.

Hold my glasses.

Go for it, Tommy.

She got so fat.

Straight ahead, the guy.

Go get her.

All right.

Excuse me.

Is anybody standing here?

Yes, Melvin.

This spot is reserved for members of the human race.

This won't take long.

Good.

Hi.

I don't believe you know me,
but, uh... Aren't you Melvin Belvin?

Hey, fellas, you were wrong.

She does know me.

She knows me.

My life isn't worth living.

So, there we were, right?

Yeah, right.

We finished our picnic lunch.

We're lying back in that tall, green grass.

Yeah.

Feeling the effects of the wine.

All right, all right, man.

And I looked, it was such a hot day.

All right, now slow down, slow down.

All right, I looked out.

And I saw that cool lake, and it seemed so refreshing.

And, well, we didn't have our swimming suits.

Yeah, man, and now really slow down.

Uh, where was I?

We didn't have our swimming suits.

Swimming suits, right.

Right, so, well, we looked at each other.

Right.

And we said, why not, right?

Yeah, right, right, right.

So, we did it.

You did it.

We did it.

We rented a paddle boat.

And she let you?

Of course.

Plus, look.

Maybe you and I could double date next weekend.

I wouldn't want to cramp your style, though.

Welcome to my office.

I've been expecting you.

You have?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

And everybody comes around here begging for help.

I knew you'd be here sooner or later.

Wait.

This is amazing.

You mean... You're actually going to help me?

Will you even get me a date for Saturday night?

Melvin, I could get you a date that would
correct your vision.

Cowabunga!

But I won't.

You're off my desk.

Melvin, Melvin, please, get your head out
of there, will you?

Now, listen to me, all right?

If a man is hungry, I give him a can of
tuna, he's had a meal.

If I teach him how to fish, he'll never go hungry again.

But, Fonz, I'm allergic to seafood.

I try very, very hard not to say anything
unless I ask you a question.

Now, the thing is that you lack a positive
self-image, which is up here, you understand?

Now, everybody's got a view master in their brain.

I want you to look through your view master.

Pick a subject.

How's about the weather?

You can do this.

You can do this.

All right, all right, all right.

What kind of weather are we talking about?

Mainly drizzle.

This is like, uh, Rembrandt working with Crayolas.

All right, all right, listen.

Click the picture.

Now you can see a hurricane nobody can resist.

A hurricane.

Hey, hey, hey, Fonz.

Yeah?

You won't believe what's going on in here.

Tell me about it.

But I'm a giant hurricane, see?

And the palm trees are swaying,
and I'm sweeping girls off their feet,

and I'm destroying Miami.

Nobody can resist the fury of a hurricane.

That's right.

I'm a hurricane.

I'm a hurricane.

I'm a hurricane.

I'm a hurricane.

Oh, do I miss my conversations with Richie.

Hurricane.

Hey, see?

There's something I'm going to ask you.

Yes, Melvin?

Would you do me the honor of accompanying
me to the costume extravaganza Saturday night?

Yes.

I mean, no.

I can't.

Yes.

Maybe some other time.

Yes, like when Haley's Comet comes around again.

Hey.

Hey.

Look here, K.C.

Cunningham.

I'm a man.

You're a woman.

This is a table.

And I'm your date.

So I'll pick you up Saturday night at 8.

Ha.

How about that?

I guess I'm going out on my first date.

Oh, look on the bright side.

Hey, it's a costume party.

He'll probably be wearing a mask.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

October 16th, 1954.

The Honeymooners episode, Love Letter, airs on
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Well, that does it, Marion.

We just blew the 7.15 showing of To k*ll a Mockingbird.

Dear, dear, we can't leave until Casey's date picks her up.

We'll go to the 7.30 show at the Majestic.

I don't want to see another Gidget movie.

Besides, it's not the same Gidget anymore.

All right, Marion, hurry.

He's going to be here any minute,
and I'm not going to be ready.

Coming, coming.

Isn't this exciting?

It's just like Joanie all over again.

Yes.

Will you hurry up, please, Marion?

We miss Gidget.

We have to go see Son of Flubber.

She'll be right down.

Sit down and make yourself comfortable.

Keep your feet off the table.

The kitchen is closed, and she's got to be home by 11.

Oh, no, that's fine, because I have to be home at 10.30.

Casey, Captain Whizbang is here.

You better get a move on it.

Come on, come on.

This is it.

Now, don't be nervous.

Oh, Melvin, does she look adorable?

What, Melvin?

Well, Howard, what did you do with Casey's date?

Well, he was standing right here.

Enter Belvin.

How did you know that was me?

Well, you picked up a very... very interesting costume.

You put on Cologne.

It was time to pick up your chick.

You chickened out.

And you came here for a booster.

That's right.

That's like buying a Playboy magazine and
only reading the interview.

I didn't think you'd understand, Fonz.

See, you never felt the sting of rejection
because no girl's ever said no to you.

Don't be silly.

First time I ever dated Ashley Pfister, she
chased me out of her apartment with a baseball bat.

Now, listen, you're a hurricane, right?

Go out there and blow and straighten your seams, will you?

Fonz.

Yo.

Thank you.

You know, no one has ever taken the time
to listen to my problems before.

Not my parents, not my teachers,
not even my Filipino pen pal.

Fonz.

Yeah.

I love you.

Ha.

Let that be our little secret, all right?

Oh, wait, Marion, it's really okay.

I did not want to go to that party anyway.

Oh, fiddlesticks, you're going to that party.

Well, just throw a sheet over your Uncle
Howard and he'll take you.

Marion.

Hi, K.C., you ready to go?

Oh, look, now, come on, you're ready to go.

Here we go.

Oh, Uncle Howard, your shirt's wrinkled.

Well, lie down and I'll iron it for you.

Oh, no, no, dear, that's not important.

You two have a wonderful time.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Oh, Howard, what a strange couple.

Oh, my God.

Blue moon I do what you would.

Without you dreaming my heart Without you
dreaming my heart Without you dreaming my

heart Without a love of my own Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Jenny, why does everybody keep staring at me and laughing?

Is it this costume?

Oh, no, it's your date.

He can't dance, he can't talk, and his seams are crooked.

Well, at least it's a nice party.

Hmm?

Jenny, I'm just... I'm just sorry
that you don't have a date tonight.

Oh, Cinderella does not intend to leave
this ball without her prince.

No, you know how these parties go.

Some couple will get into a fight, and
I'll just pick up the guy on a rebound.

Oh, K.C., check it out.

The Lincolns are fighting again.

This is my big chance.

Coming, Abe.

No, Jenny, no, wait.

No, no, don't go.

Don't leave me alone here with... Hello.

Melvin.

I'm back.

You know, the extravaganza's almost over,
and I still haven't asked you to dance.

You're not going to ask me to dance, are you?

What a great idea.

Let's cut a rug.

Thank you, gentlemen and Clarence.

Well, that's it for tonight, folks.

I just want to remind you that you had a very good time.

And I want to thank you for my new freezer.

Now, next Saturday night, we're going to have
another big dance because my car needs a new fuel pump.

Good night.

Good night, everybody.

Good night.

Hey, Tommy, going out to Inspiration Point tonight?

Yeah, I suppose so.

I don't think I'm going to get very far
with my date tonight.

Are we going to Inspiration Point?

What's Inspiration Point?

Well, that's a place where guys and gals
go to kiss their lips off.

Oh, I'd rather go home.

She wants to go to her place.

Looks like Hurricane Melvin's about to... Touchdown!

Uncle Howard?

Aunt Marion?

Doesn't look like anybody's home.

They'll be home in just a second.

Or sooner.

Well, Melvin, I had a lovely evening.

Good night.

Good night?

What kind of guy do you think I am?

I'm not going to leave you here on your lonesome.

So, do you have any hobbies?

I collect bugs.

Oh, good.

That must be fascinating.

Tell me all about it.

Well, there's not much to it.

You just catch them, k*ll them, and pin them to a board.

Um, it wasn't until recently that I found
out that spiders aren't really insects.

You see, insects, they have six legs, and the spiders
have eight legs, and that makes them part of the arachnid.

Family.

So, how about those packers?

What in the sand hill are you doing?

Gads, woman.

This is what guys and gals do on a date in Milwaukee.

Uh-oh.

My hormones are on roller skates.

Pucker up, my little rodent.

No!

No?

No, Maddie!

I know what that means.

Just one little kiss.

We'll keep the doors open.

Use one lip.

Oh, man.

I'll give you a piece of cheese.

I'll give you just one kiss all I want.

A little kiss.

A little affection.

Just one little wuh-oh.

Sorry I had to do this, Melvin.

You're sorry.

Oh, I got Jiminy Crickets.

What's going on here?

He wouldn't take no for an answer.

All right, all right, all right.

You better let me do that.

That's my job.

I think you're hurting him anyway.

Get up here.

Get down here.

Get down here.

Leave this.

Oh, I thought I forced K.C.

to go out.

Oh, gosh.

I mean, every day again.

Fonz, I was only doing what you told me to.

I didn't know it was K.C.

See, it was like... The Wizard of Oz.

He came to me for courage.

I should have given him a brain.

It's all right, because he learned his lesson.

It's all right.

He'll never do this again.

I'm going to k*ll him.

Let's go.

Not in the house.

You'll take him outside.

Of course not.

No, wait, wait, wait.

Just a minute.

This may come as a surprise to you,
but I'm very glad that I went out tonight.

I was afraid I wouldn't know how to handle
myself with a boy alone, but I guess I did pretty good.

Really?

So you don't hate me?

You'll go out with me again, huh?

No.

Oh.

Oh, wait.

Just a minute.

Just a minute.

Finals are coming up in two months,
and we can study together.

Wow.

A study buddy.

Dreams really do come true.

Fonz.

Fonz, I... Remember our secret.

Oh, good night.

Oh, what a strange boy.

Well, I guess I'm playing daddy again.

Oh, Casey, come on.

Come on, upstairs.

I want to hear what everybody was wearing.

Fonzie.

Yeah.

Do you mind if I ask you something?

No.

Why in the world would you help out anyone
like Melvin Belvin?

Why would you hire someone like Potsie Weber?

Oh, my God.

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Oh, after all the excitement tonight, it
sure was nice of you to fix us a little snack.

Oh, it was nothing.

Just a little something I just whipped up for us.

Oh, this looks wonderful.

Just blow it out.

Oh, well.

You know, you know, some people just have
chocolate chip cookies with their milk.

Boy, it was sure good that you and Uncle
Howard showed up when you did.

Otherwise, I might have had to hurt Melvin.

Oh, you know, it was all my fault when we
had our little talk about dating.

I forgot to tell you that some boys aren't
quite as nice as they should be.

They really aren't.

How did you handle it when a
boy would get a little bit too... Frisky.

Yes, frisky.

Well.

Well, I would just look him in the eye and I would
say, if you want a girl who's fast, her love won't last.

If you want a girl who's nice, manners are the price.

And that worked?

It stunned him long enough for me to make my getaway.

I don't care what you've read in your history books.

Abel Lincoln's an animal.

Goodbye, gray sky, hello, blue.

This night can hold me while...
She's accused of stealing another girl's

bike, gets glasses, smashes the family
portrait, and then hocks her own bike.

A bad day even by Jan Brady standards.

Brady Bunch number 62 is coming up next on TV Land.

Stay tuned.

Baby, these happy days are yours and mine.

These happy days are yours and mine.

Happy days.