09x19 - Thirst Impressions

[bunniefuu]

- Previously
on "The Real Housewives

of Beverly Hills"...

- Welcome to Chateau Ventoux.

- Ooh. This is like coming
into, like, a museum.

- Camille sent a picture
of a house on fire,

and I wrote back,
"Camille, is this your house?"

She's like, "Yes, it"...
- Yes, it is.

- You b*tch! You dress like me!

- Pat the puss, honey.
- Ahh!

- Erika Jayne gives you
the permission

to do a whole lot of sh...

- I just gave a whole
lot of permission.

- It gives you a whole lot
of permission.

- It's so .....ing fun.

- Erika Jayne, Erika Girardi,

wouldn't talk like that
to any of us.

- I don't think that you're
the person that says, "F you."

- I know your feelings
weren't hurt.

- Not at all.

- Was it not a little
uncomfortable for you?

- No. It wasn't for me,
but it was for you guys.

I get that.

I'm not annoyed that Lisa Rinna
used the Erika Jayne persona.

I am, however, becoming annoyed

at how you two
will not let it go.

[upbeat music]

- In the game of life,
it's Rinna take all.

♪ ♪

- Most people talk
about their fantasies.

I'm living mine.

- In business and in life,

I wear many hats
and hairstyles.

- You can stab me in the back,

but whilst you're there,
kiss my a*s.

- I'm not afraid of hard work,

but I'll never
do your dirty work.

- My problem
with the tabloids?

My real life
is so much juicier.

- In Beverly Hills,

the truth always has a way
of rising to the top.

[upbeat accordion music]

♪ ♪

- Morning.

- Good morning.
- I'm so tired.

- I know.
- We all are.

- I need coffee really badly.

- I need oodles amounts
of coffee.

- Hi, baby. Oh, wow.
- I love passion fruit.

I only ever have it
when I'm away.

[phone chimes]

- My sister just said,
"Are you guys okay?

Are you burning down?"

We still don't know what
Denise...if she has a house.

- We don't know whether
Denise's house has been...

- She still doesn't
know anything.

- The fire is literally on PCH,
and I was so scared

we were not gonna even get out
of there,

and I think our house
might be burning down.

- No!
- No!

- Good morning.
- I guess Erika's still asleep.

- She's coming down.
- Oh, there she is.

- Hello.

- Morning.
- Morning.

- There's something
about waking up.

We're all in our PJs.

- How are you, girl?
How'd you sleep?

- You feel, like,
this real closeness.

- I slept okay. I...yeah,
I have a bit of a migraine,

which I felt coming on last
night.

Well, I'm not in a good mood.

I have a vicious migraine
brought on by the lack

of sleep and b*tches
that want you to be offended

by something
you're not offended by.

- Were you not also shocked
that she talked like that,

'cause that was not a portrayal
of who you really are.

- You guys are making it out
to be something that it isn't.

Stop. It's okay. Relax.

- Well, there you go.

I was telling the girls that,
you know,

I organized
to go to the winery at 1:30.

- Hmm.

- So we can, until then,
do whatever we want.

- Okay.

- I think I have to get moving,
or I'm gonna go back to sleep.

- Yes.
- I'm getting tired.

- See you in a bit, guys.

[upbeat electronic music]

♪ ♪

- Yay.

- Okay, that was enough
of a workout.

You tried to get the door open.
- I can't tell if it's raining

or if that's
the fountain that kind of...

- Oh, the wind-blown fountain?
- The wind-blown...

- Oh!

Well, why are we going
towards the fountain then?

- Because that's how we have
to get to the squashing.

- Well, can we cross now?

- Ah!

- [laughs]

- A blast of water in my face.

- Oh.
- Hello.

- Bonjour. Bonjour.

This is my exercise
for the day.

- Maybe we should just walk
around and see the property.

- What? Hold on.
- Where's the bounce?

- I think you have to, like,
warm it up or something.

- [laughs]

I don't know what methods
you need to get ba*ls

warmed up and going.

Maybe Teddi's just got
that magic touch.

- Oh.
[laughter]

[upbeat music]

Go. Yes.

- Oh, yes!

Yes, seven, eight!

- Ugh.

- We made nine.

- I have a concussion.

- Oh.

- [inaudible] head.
- Yes.

Is there any blood
on that wall?

- You know what?

- We did great.
- We did it.

We really k*lled it.
- We did it.

- I'm walking in the chapel.
- Oh, let's look at the chapel.

- Ooh, let's say a prayer
for everybody in LA.

- Let's.
- Oh, wow.

- Oh. You guys,
this is beautiful.

- This is perfect.

- Look at this.

- I have a home chapel.

So welcome to my chapel.

Fun, right?

- This...

- Is crazy, right?
- Wow.

- But this is like
a mini-church.

This is really beautiful.

- Let's light candles
for Camille,

- Camille, Denise...

- And everyone.

All we can do is say a prayer.

It makes me feel connected

and to honor
what's going on back at home.

[upbeat funky music]

♪ ♪

- Oh, my God. Look at all that.

Look at...all this is black.

I don't know how they got
these fires out.

Look at how fast they've moved.

- Oh, my God, all these hills.

- I cannot believe how much
.....ing burned.

We are so lucky we got out.

The fear of trying to get out
of Malibu

no one knows
unless they were sitting there.

The fire was coming so fast,

and I've never been
in that situation

where I felt so trapped
and couldn't get out.

- It's eerie, isn't it?

- It is very eerie.
- It is. It's eerie.

I wonder how much damage
is at our place.

- I don't think we're gonna be
living back here very soon.

Oh, our beautiful community.

- Reduced to rubble
in a minute.

- Sh...

- That is torched,
everything there.

- Lookit.

The fire's right across
the street from our house.

- We are so lucky.

We got everyone out
to safety, baby.

- We got out just in time.

- I mean, this could've
been so bad.

- We're so lucky.

Oh, the smell is so bad.
- Oh, you can smell it.

Look at all the soot.
- So weird.

It looks like we ransacked
our house when we left

running
so fast to get our sh...

- We took what we could.

- Sammy did say if we got in
to grab...

I should put her stuff
in the garbage bags.

- Baby, you want me
to take these?

- Forget it.
I'll buy her new sh...

That stuff's gonna smell
like smoke anyway,

and I'll need a moving truck
to get all these bags out.

We're so lucky.

The whole street would have
burned down

if one house caught on fire.

Look at that.

It's right across from our
house.

[somber music]

♪ ♪

- Sh...
Looks like some horror movie.

Wow.

This was the first house
after my divorce

that was my house
that was all mine.

[knock at door]

- Hey.
- Hey, how are you, beautiful?

- For you.
- Oh, thank you.

- Nice. It's beautiful
out here. Are you kidding?

- Come on out.
- This is so pretty.

- And now that's taken from me.

It's devastating.

Oh, Mason, your cup. Mason.

We'll start over again.

So, Kimber, I'm guessing
from what the firemen told me,

I guess the embers from that
were blowing,

because the wind was kicking up
and caught what they believe

caught in the eaves of the
house.

Mason's room is gone.

My room...

- Didn't they say they fought
for, like, four hours?

- They fought
for more than that.

Mason looked at me.

What did you say
when we were walking out?

- I was like, "This house is
going down."

♪ ♪

- I don't even know where to
begin.

- Coming up...

- I feel like the two of you
are in cahoots.

So are you're trying
to push me out?

- Oh, stop.

♪ ♪

[upbeat electronic music]

- ♪ Hey ♪

- Ladies, can you guys
come outside please?

- She's got something
to show us, Lisa.

- All right, off we go.

[dramatic music]

Well, you guys,
who's ready for the vineyard?

- I love it.
- If I'm gonna do this trip,

I'm gonna really do it right.

- I feel very fancy.

- I really don't want
to go in a helicopter.

- Erika, I get it.

You've probably ridden a lot
of helicopter in your day,

but this is my first time!

- Hello. How are you?
- Jéremié.

- Kyle.

- Lord have mercy on my soul.

- Kyle, is this an indication

that you have lost all
the fears that you once had?

- Have you lost your mind?

- Listen, girls,
I've come a long way.

In the past, I have
been terrified of flying.

Holy, ...-ing sh... .....ing Hell.
Oh, my God.

- Yay!
- I'm so grateful...

This past summer, my husband

had us take a helicopter
from San Tropez to the airport.

Being up that high and
looking down, it was beautiful.

- You've come a long way, Kyle.

- Look at how pretty
the view of it is.

Wow, Kyle.

- I just would like to note
how much I've grown,

that I'm calm right now.

- Bravo, Kyle.

- Oh, that's a little bump.

- I'm not gonna lie.

I don't like this jiggling
left to right.

I like to go straight.
- Nervous Nellie is back.

- I'm trying to do things that
I wouldn't normally do.

- Because life is short, guys.
Life is short.

- Let's hope it's not that
short right now, Rinna, Okay?

Let's hope it's very long right
now.

[upbeat music]

- Wow.
- Oh, this is amazing.

♪ ♪

- Whoo.

♪ ♪

- Thank you so much.
- Hey, Kyle,

you did really well.
- Thank you, girls.

- Honestly, you know, 'cause
helicopters crash all the time.

- Oh, thanks, Erika.

- I just was waiting until
we were on the ground safely

to let you know.
- Well, by the way...

[upbeat accordion music]

♪ ♪

- Hi, I'm Renaud.
- Oh, look at this.

- It's beautiful, eh?
- Gorgeous.

- So beautiful.

- So Luberon is very known
around the world.

And I guess you love wine,
I suppose.

- We love wine.

- And we are going to make a
blending.

- Oh, wow.
- Okay?

- Exciting.
- Let's go.

[upbeat music]

Okay, so have a seat.

- Look at this.

Ahh.

- We have some cheese.
- Wow.

- Cheese, ladies?
- Wow.

- This is so good.

- It's so good.
- I know.

Everything is so good.
- I mean, this is like heaven.

- I love a wine tasting.

It's more of, like,
a social activity

as opposed to, like,
a boozing session.

- I've been to Napa one time
in my life,

and
we didn't even go wine-tasting.

I went to the spa.

- You know, you see the people,
and they're like...

[gargles and spits]

No. I want to drink it.

- I'm not gonna drink it,

but I should taste it
just to be polite.

- Also, that bowl is if we
don't like the particular one.

- You take a sip of it,

and then
you put the rest in the bowl.

- You don't drink everything.

Otherwise, you'll
be really drunk.

- Yeah, you just take
a sip of it.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Cheers.

- For this wine,
it is very light.

Very light, a nicer pink color,
but very, very light.

- That's very good.
- Isn't that nice?

- [laughs]

[glass dinging]

- Mm-hmm.

- Oh. Nice.

- This is a Shiraz.

- This will be heavier.

- A little bit, yeah.

- Mmm.

- I like each one better
and better each time.

[laughter]

- Here's your last one.

- Very tasty.

- Don't pretend to
dump yours, Dorit.

- She's dumping air.

She's like,
"I'm done with this. No way."

- Yeah.
Here, I'm just gonna dump it.

- Wait. Hold on. Hold on.

[laughter]

Okay, ready for the next.

- Dorit, here, just do it.
Just take the .....ing bottle.

- But so which bottles
that you have prefer?

- I like that, that,
and that one.

- I like the first
and the last.

- And I like one, two, and
three.

- I liked one, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight.

I'm so confused. Can we start
from the beginning?

[laughter]

- No. No, no, no.

- I'm gonna pee my pants.
- Did you just snort?

- Always.

- We're really .....ing
lightweights.

- No, I just think you're
drunk.

- You do?
- Yeah. I do.

When you have a migraine,
you don't drink,

so I'm the sober one
at lunch here today.

- Don't take away my sample!
- How do you really feel?

- You guys,
let's talk about it.

Let's...let's get it all
on the table.

- You bet I'm gonna
talk about it.

- I'm gonna pee my pants.

- And when you don't drink,

you get a little irritated
with the drunks.

Let's be honest.

- I'm sorry. We laugh too much.

- Okay, so that's
the first one.

I'm going to take
my test tube, okay?

- Oh, look.

- It's like a fun
science class.

- Yeah.
- Right?

- I had a really
fun time today.

- And after, we blend.

- Very scientific.
- Okay.

- This is the blend.
- Mmm.

- Okay, this is good.
So where can we buy this?

Can we buy this in the States?

- Not yet.
- Darn.

- I hope to find a distributor.

- Oh.
- Oh.

- Somebody should be
selling alcohol in this group.

- Well, someone does,
but she's not here right now.

- Tonight is about celebration
of my daughter and husband

Jason
to bring this rosé to fruition.

- My turn. I'd like to be
the new rosé seller.

- Yeah.
- Rinna rosé.

- Rinna rosé!
- Rinna rosé!

- Rinna rosé.

Anybody who's interested,
call me. I'm ready.

- One, two, three.
- I'm in Provence, France,

and I have come up
with the best rosé.

We mix these three together.
It is so magnificent.

It is so fruit-u.
It's so delicious.

- Fruit-u?
- It's so fruit-u.

- And you are gonna...
you are gonna .....ing die!

- [inaudible]
- QVC, here we come.

Why did you say
better than sex?

- It's way better than sex.

Are you kidding me?
You take one...

- Even he doesn't agree
with you.

- Both, both, both.

- Thank you so much.

I mean, I never really liked
that rosé anyways,

so I'd rather have
a better one.

- Oh, Rinna. The shade.

- I can choose what kind
of rosé I like.

I never liked that rosé.
I prefer Whispering Angel.

I've said to her,
"I like Whispering Angel,"

and she said, "Well, what
about Vanderpump Rosé?" And...

[laughter]

- I literally cannot...
- I just had to spend the day

with Rinna
doing interpretations.

Can you be all of us?

- I could.
- You're the actress.

- Rinna, this'll be fun.
- Do me first please.

I want to see.

- Listen, it's very touchy.
- I think if we can all laugh

and talk about it,
then that's fine.

- Last night, Kyle was giving
Lisa Rinna sh...

about impersonating me.

- Erika Jayne, Erika Girardi,
our friend Erika,

who's one human being no matter
what you guys want to say,

wouldn't talk like that
to any of us.

- But she's good
with them today.

When isn't life
full of double standards?

♪ ♪

- Coming up...

- Do Teddi.
- Like she got off a horse.

- [laughs]

- My walk is so bad.

It's just like my dad's is.

[upbeat accordion music]

- I just had to spend the day
with Rinna

doing interpretations.

- Do me first, please.
I want to see.

- Listen, it's very touchy.

- I think if we can all laugh
and talk about it,

then that's fine.

Give me a little snippet.
- Oh, sure.

I do everybody.
- I do you too.

- Hello.
- You do me?

- I talk to Harry Hamlin.

- Thank you, Harry Hamlin.
Oh, it's Harry Hamlin. Hello?

I can't wait to go home
and tell Harry Hamlin

he's getting a blow job
from Erika Jayne.

- I told Harry,
"We do have fun."

- Wait! Is that a bee?

- [laughs]

- Ah! A bee!

Oh, my God. There's a bee.
I'm so sorry.

There's a bee.
Is that a bee?

No.

- [laughs]

- Where is my EpiPen?

- [laughs]
- That was good.

That was good.

- Jaggy.
- Oh, Jaggy. Jaggy.

- Jaggy. Where's Jaggy?

Jaggy.

- Oh, it's [inaudible]
and Jaggy!

Oh, my God.

- Go for it, Jaggy.
- Whoo.

- I'm coming for you, Jaggy.
- No.

- Jaggy. [inaudible]

I don't like that game. Jaggy.

- Well. I am not surprised that
you haven't had an acting job

since you were seven years old.

- Okay.

- Ba-dum-bum.

- [laughs]

- Do Teddi.

- Well, I got to do
the walk then.

- Do Teddi. Do it.
- Okay, this is Teddi.

This is Teddi.

- My walk is so bad.

It's just like my dad's is.

This is a lock.
It's got to be like...

like she got off a horse.

- [laughs]

Can I tell you something?

That was lot last night.

Like, enough, okay?
Stop.

I can't...I cannot with this.

Cannot.

[laughter]

Oh, my God. That face.

[laughter]

- I just put cheese
down my shirt.

- It is impression
after impression,

and no one here is offended.

However uncomfortable
it may have been

for all of us to watch...

- Which it was.
That's all we're saying.

Wasn't that a little
uncomfortable for you?

- No, it wasn't for me,
but it was for you guys.

I get that.
It's not personal to me.

It's all good. It's fun.
I can take a joke.

- Kyle, do it again.
- Or you could do Denise.

- You just have to do the face.
- Perplexed.

She's like...

- You've got to turn your mouth
down just a little bit.

There it is. A little bit.

- What's happening here?

- You guys, I really feel bad
about it,

but you know,
I think she's a mother.....er,

but I feel really bad about it.

- Oh, my God.
You're doing Camille.

- Oh, my God.
Look at you.

Always hitting it
out of the ballpark.

Always gorgeous.

There's something about
Dorit that just gets me.

The fake accent, all of it.
She makes the back

of the little hairs
on your neck just stand up.

- Do you want to come
to my wedding?

At my wedding?
That b*tch.

Can you .....ing believe
what she .....ing did?

Oh, so good to see you.

- Oh, what about Erika?
- No, we already know.

- I already did that.
- Hey.

- I'm not gonna do this.
I'm tired.

- That's right.

- I'm not gonna do this
right now.

Honey, we're good.

- I'm good. I'm good.

- All right.
- Okay?

- Good.
- I'm good. I'm good.

I don't want to...I don't want
to do this.

- We're having fun.
- It's a good time.

- This is a good time.
- We're having a good time.

I'm good. It's okay.

I'm good.
This is a good time.

- Let me tell you something,
Dorit. This is a good time.

- But you know what?
She's dead-on.

- You guys,
we have fun, don't we?

- Yeah, we do have fun, guys.
- Yes, we have fun.

- I got to say cheers to us.
- Yes.

- Yes.
- Cheers. Cheers. Cheers.

- We are .....ing hilarious.
- Funny and friends.

- We are funny and friends.

- Erika, your glass
missed mine.

- Did it?
- Don't do it again.

Thank you.
Thanks.

- Okay.

[upbeat electronic music]

- Rosé all day.

- Bring it on, Kyle.

- We got to go
this way I think.

- I'm not doing that damn
long walk.

- Guys, we have glasses
for you.

- Dorit, do you want to go in
the boring car or the fun car?

- We just...

- Oh, God, Erika,
that was funny.

And everyone got roasted.

- Everyone.
- Every single one of us.

- Everyone.
- Hold on. Where's our cups?

- Oh, where's those cups at?
- Hold on.

Where's our wine cups?
- Wait, we left the cups.

We gotta stop that car.

- Stop! Stop! Stop!

- The glasses are in the car.

- Oh, the glass is in the car?

- Oh. We got 'em all.

Look, you guys. Uh-oh.

[laughter]

You guys...
- I am gonna...

- Did we not die laughing?
- Oh, my God.

- Dead. Dead.

- This is me having a .....ing
blast.

- You are...
- You are so amazing, Kyle.

- Am I not
the funniest person ever?

- I'm having a good time.
- Good time.

- Having a good time.
- Oh, Kyle doing you?

Hilarious.
- Having a good time.

- I love a drunk Rinna.

Sober Rinna is so boring.
I'm sorry.

- Oh, my God.
I love a drunk Rinna.

- I'm like, "Don't bore me."

- A drunk Rinna is so good.

- And sober Erika's worse.

- [laughs]

- Don't even act like you don't
think it's true.

- Last night was rough
on the fun scale.

- Erika was not fun.
Erika was not...not fun.

- Can just say also,

and yet we can all
collectively,

the people...the participants of
the night...laugh.

I feel like
I'm in a tough position,

because I think Kyle and Teddi
were out of order last night.

- Hiding behind a character
was confusing.

- It's her alter ego.
It's this person that is free

to be who they want
to be and do, and so...

- Maybe I need clarity
on that then.

- I have a lot of fun
with Erika.

- Let's be honest.

Breakfast this morning
was not that way.

- No.
- And Erika came in pissed off.

- Erika does have a good time.

- I'm a little just,
like, a zombie.

Not on purpose; I'm just having
a [inaudible] minute.

- Close your eyes,
and who cares?

I'll go lay in the back.
- No, it's fine. Don't.

Stay right here.
I'm not even...no.

If I close my eyes...
- No, but I could lay

in the back
actually is what I'm saying.

- Oh, then go lay down
if you need to.

- I'd like to lay in the back.

- Erika has to know
that it comes off

a certain way when she's like,
"I'm having fun,"

but she sounds
like Debbie Downer.

- Sometimes it feels like
she's annoyed

to be hanging out with us.

- [yawns]

- Coming up...

- So now I'm feeling
a little bullied,

and maybe I should go
to bed now.

- I actually want...I
actually want...

- Oh, no.

- You guys want
to make up sh...? Keep going.

- Erika.
- Keep going.

[door slams]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I'm here.
- Hi.

I'm in here,
and you're all late.

- Oh, yeah, I love to get drunk

and then change
into fancy formalwear.

- Oh, hi.
- You're all late.

- Erika's like...
- We're all lit. Are you lit?

- Uh, yeah. Right now.
- Hi.

- Hello, my lovely.
- Hello.

- Sorry to keep you waiting.
- That's cute.

- Look at that belt.
- Queen McQueen McQueen.

- Is it McQueen?
- Yeah.

- Oh, it's so good.

You're so good in McQueen.
- Yeah.

- It's really good.
That was fun, you guys.

- We know how to have fun.

- I need a c*ck.
- [inaudible]

go right afterwards...
- I need a bigger glass.

- Than having
to t*rture yourself.

- Vodka tonic, please.
- Until you get it right.

- Can we get, um, some
c*ck

for these high-maintenance
people?

- [laughs]
- One of them is very annoying.

- [laughs]

- We called Edwin.

I was like, "Hey, babe.
Oh, my gosh.

"We had so much fun,
and we cracked up.

Blah, blah, blah.
Kyle imitated me," and he goes,

"Did she walk like she
just got off a horse?"

She did my walk.

- The "I just got off
a horse" walk?

[laughter]

- Do I know her or not?

- You do.
- There you go, ladies.

[inaudible],
soup of 13 vegetables. Enjoy.

- Thank you.
- Excuse me, sir?

Can we get another round?

- Yes.

- You know,
life is not always easy.

Life is not always perfect,
and we act like our lives

are great
and everything's okay, and...

- That's just a facade.
- It is.

- But I don't think
I act like that.

- I think I always want things
to be a certain way,

and when they're not, I really
struggle with it, and...

- Where does that come
from you think?

- I think because I grew up
with not a lot of structure.

I went, like, ten-fold.

- Kyle, do you do the same?

- I...uh...yeah, I do.

- Of course you do.

- I do. Teddi, to me,

I feel like we were
in a weird way raised the same.

- Yeah. Very similar.

- Really?
- Oh, my God.

I'm gonna get emotional.
- It's okay.

- But there's not a lot
of people in my life

that I've felt very safe with.
- That's a big deal.

- Oh, I love you.

- But, you guys, that's a big
deal.

That is...isn't that what
we want almost more

than anything, to feel safe?

- I've never done girls' trips,

and I probably wouldn't have
if it wasn't for you.

- Oh, you guys,
this is so nice.

What a nice moment to have.

- Teddi and Kyle have gotten
really, really close.

Kyle lends clothes to Teddi.

She kind of helps her
get dressed, put her makeup on.

Eventually you're just
gonna see

that they've morphed
into one person.

- I think we would all show up
and support one another,

because that's who we are.

I really believe that.
- It's not just about that.

We can all say, "Oh, showing up
to support, blah, blah, blah."

That's, like, .....ing bullsh...

- I've never supported anybody

until I came into this group.
- What do you mean?

- I never found a group
of girls

that I did not feel like

I was competitive with.

♪ ♪

I am someone that has not
been liked by a lot of women.

I want to have a group
of women friends.

I've never had a group
of women friends,

and the reason is because
I just don't trust it.

Have women opened doors for me?
No.

Have women been
my best friends? No.

- What's changed?
- Oh, my level of comfort

and my level of security,
my level of trust.

- No, but as our group
got smaller,

I feel like
the trust became more.

- Duh.

I am much more comfortable,

because the dark cloud
has been removed.

- Erika, when you sent me
a couple of lines

in your condolence card,
it was a little distant.

- No, that's a very personal
note from me.

I'm very sorry
you feel that way,

but that comes from my heart.

When you remove a personality
like Lisa Vanderpump

away from a group of women
like this,

we've been able to connect
on a much more human level.

Not a soul in this group
is jealous.

- I think...I agree.
- I do not feel...

- Totally agree.
- No offense.

I'm not jealous of anyone.

- You're not letting me finish.
- I don't want your life,

your husband,
your life,

your husband,
your life, your husband. Like...

- Yeah, so like...so back
to what I was saying...

- I have the best life
in the whole...amazing.

- That's what I was saying.
- Right, exactly.

- I mean,
that's what I was saying.

I don't feel like anyone

in this group
is jealous of anyone.

- But last night you seemed...I
have to say this.

I swear to God on my life
I'm not attacking,

but I think you were
irritated last night.

[tense music]

And when you're irritated...
- Of course I was irritated.

Because it was making something
out of nothing.

- Why did you want Erika to
feel a certain way last night?

- I didn't.
- You did.

- No.
- It certainly felt that way.

- It felt like you wanted her
to feel a certain way.

- You thought I was attacking
you last night?

- I didn't say the word
"attacking."

It was just, like,
don't you think it's weird...

- I wanted you to be honest
about how you felt.

- Why is this an issue to begin
with?

I really have no idea.

How did you feel, Erika?
- I didn't feel anything other

than I thought it was great.

Listen, it was a good time.
You guys worked it out.

- So you're not gonna say that
when Lisa Rinna was...

- You had great time
last night.

- Giving the thing going and
saying, "[BLEEP] you,"

that you weren't like, "That's
not me"?

- We're here talking
about Farrahween again?

What the [BLEEP]
are you talking about?

This is so ridiculous.

Let me be clear.

I'm not gonna change
my position, so stop asking me.

- Okay.

- Rinna's
so in .....ing character.

Look at that. Erika's not
that big of a b*tch.

- Did you have a problem
with it?

- I thought it was weird.

- I didn't even think
about this

until
you brought it up last night.

- You seemed upset.

- Yeah, because
it's so out of left field.

- But why do you care?

- If someone's like, "I'm Kyle.

I'm gonna be a .....ing as*h*le,
blah, blah,"

I'd be like that's weird.

- What's weird is that you
care.

- Yes.
- What's weird is that

you're pushing it.
What's weird is that you're

reaching for something that...
- That's different.

That's different.
- No, what's weird is that

you're reaching for something.

- What the [BLEEP], Kyle?

Erika just said
she's finally opening up

and trusting this group.

What the [BLEEP]
do you want, to push her away?

♪ ♪

- Coming up...

- Where do I begin?

- I don't know, but it seems
to be a lot on your mind.

- No, but we've never
had a problem ever.

- No, and we're not having
a problem now.

- No, we actually are.

- We don't need to talk
about it anymore.

I don't understand why
you guys want me to feel

a certain way about it.
I'm good.

- I'm good.

I've got this.
I'm good. Sounds familiar.

Honey, we're good.

We're fine.

- It's a good time.

- I was playing
Erika Jayne the whole night.

I was at the DJ booth.
- I know. I know.

- I mean, you've seen
all the pictures.

You've sent me
some great pictures.

- Hi.

- I don't want to be in there
anymore.

- Kyle, shh.

- Not Kyle.
What is your name? Teddi.

The only thing is that Kyle's
so .....ing drunk.

We all are, though.

Why do you have such an issue
with pulling?

My God, you cannot pull a
.....ing door to save your life.

- Where'd everyone go?

- I think it just makes me sad
that there's,

like, discord around, you know?

- Whatever.
It's do weird.

[snores]

What do you really feel?

- I feel like she's in...in
a bad mood with us.

- When?

- All the time.

- Well, then maybe that's what
you have to talk to her about.

Whatever you have going on,
I think it's deeper than this.

Didn't we finish this at
the restaurant the other night?

Why did this come up again?

Why are we still
talking about it?

- I don't feel like Erika's
having fun with us.

Like, she's not enjoying
her time with us.

But that's what I feel like.
I feel like she's like...

[snores]
Like...

she doesn't
enjoy having a girls' trip.

- We're all trying to have
a good time,

and it feels .....ing awkward.

- Kyle and Teddi
are just out of order.

I think they should be
letting it go at this point.

Enough is enough.

- Here's Erika.
- [laughs]

Erika's right here.

- Kyle, I think you need to say
what you need to say to Erika.

- I said it. I said it.

- No, you need to say what you
just said to me to Erika.

- What did I say?

- That you don't think
that Erika's having fun with us

and doesn't enjoy
being with us.

- I did say that, yes.

- What are you talking about?
I've had the best time.

♪ ♪

What?
I didn't feel good today.

- Hello.
- Morning.

- Morning.
- How are you, girl?

How'd you sleep?

- I have a bit of a migraine,
which I felt

coming on last night.

But I said that right away,

"Hey,
you guys, I have a headache."

- But you like being around
this group?

- Well, yeah.

- I don't think you enjoy
being with us.

- I don't.

♪ ♪

- And so now it's turned into

"Erika doesn't want to be
here,"

and I don't have fun
with the group,

and you don't think
I like anybody,

so
are you trying to push me out?

- No!
- Not at all.

- We just want to understand.

- I feel like there's
something else there.

- No.
- I enjoy being with you.

- I kind of feel a little
bullied right now.

♪ ♪

- Oh, stop.

- Yeah.
I feel like the two of you

are in cahoots and now want me
to feel a certain way

about something
that never really bothered me.

- No, I actually...

- So now I'm feeling
a little bullied,

and maybe I should go
to bed now.

- I actually enjoy
being with you.

- Oh, no.
- Don't go. Stay here.

- So .....ing offended.
- Erika, stay.

- Erika.
- I have seen...

- Erika...
- By the way, if you guys

want to make up sh..., good.

Keep going.

- Erika.
- Keep going.

[door slams]

- You put her in a situation.
She felt a certain way.

It was one incident last night
that took her off-guard,

and she felt
a little sh...-y about it.

- Oh, by the way, I didn't get
the chance to say that to her.

She left.

- Well, she was there,
and you know what?

- Go now. Go follow her
and go say it now.

- No, I'm not gonna do that.

- That's what I think you need
to do, Kyle. Thank you.

- And I'm going to bed.

- Where's her room?

- Good night, guys.

- Erika.
- Yes?

- Can you talk to me
for one second?

- Yes. I'm right here.

- Where...where do I begin?

- I don't know, but it seems
to be a lot on your mind.

- No, but today was
the best day ever,

but I honestly felt like there
was no way at Farrah's party

that
you could not have felt like...

- Kyle, I'm not gonna
get into this.

Kyle is going round
and round in circles.

It's over and over and over.

Honey, I've said everything
I'm going to say.

I'm not going to
change my mind.

- We've never had
a problem ever.

- No, and we're not having
a problem now.

- No, we actually are.

- I really don't know where
this is coming from.

- We're being honest.
- Well, I'm being honest too.

Does my honesty not count?

- Here's the thing.
I like Erika,

but it was uncomfortable
last night,

and it could've easily been
resolved by being honest.

- She's doing the best she can.

We all are doing
the best we can.

- But it feels like a lie.

- I'm being honest that,
like,

that I felt, like,
honest that I...

- How 'bout let's be honest
in the morning.

I think that'd probably
be best for all of us.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- When we sit down
and we have breakfast,

and I feel uncomfortable,

it's not a
.....ing good morning.

- I was telling the girls that,
you know,

I organized to go
to the winery at 1:30.

- Hmm.

- Well, maybe you should say,
"I feel uncomfortable."

- I can't be expected to be
the moral compass

for everybody all the time.
- You're not.

- But then you guys
hold me to that.

- No, we don't. No.
No, Teddi...Teddi.

- Oh, "Teddi, are you
the accountability control?"

- No, let me tell you
something.

- No, but you see
what I'm saying.

- You know what?
- It's not my job.

- Teddi, you hold yourself
to being the moral compass,

and you need to stop.

- Get out of here.
I'll talk to you tomorrow.

- Take yourself off the hook.

That is the confusion to me.

- Okay, I understand that,
but it's...

- It all seems fake to me.

- Teddi's had a lot of
c*ck,

and when you have a lot of
c*ck,

it's like truth serum,
and it just starts pouring out.

You guys have grown so much.

- I don't want to bleed
all over your sheets.

- Oh, my gosh. I'm not angry.
I'm not mad.

My feelings aren't hurt.
None of those things.

It's just in my mind,
that's weird.

- I think it's weird that
you should care. It's possible.

- You pretending that it's full
amnesia right now is confusing.

- Don't ever say
that to me again. Don't.

- Okay.
- Don't take a step back.

- She does what she needs to do

to make you feel good,
but then...

- What's wrong with that?

- That's fine in a fake
relationship, but...

- You think that's fake?

- I know the same sh...
- Teddi sees herself in Erika.

We are affected by people

that have the same issues
that we have,

and we don't like that
in ourselves,

and so we get mad
at that person,

because we see ourselves
in that person.

Are you manipulative?
Is that what you're saying?

- I'm saying I know exactly
what one needs to do

to make people
feel comfortable.

I'm not interested in having
fake relationships with people.

- I don't think you're having
a fake relationship.

- You guys have
your relationship.

I'll see you tomorrow.
- All right.

- You need to have empathy
for her, because you are her.

From where you two come from,
you have to...

- We have similarities, but the
second that she becomes better

than everybody else,
I say [BLEEP] you.

- Teddi wants the approval
from Erika so she can go,

"Ah. I feel good.
Everything's okay."

But that won't fix it.

- I really am not interested
to get to know

somebody who's not interested
in telling me the truth.

- Here's the thing. Sometimes
life is .....ing uncomfortable.

- I want life to be...

- I know, but it's not.
Life is not perfect.

- And then when I see things
going uncomfortably...

- Teddi, you can't
fix everything.

- I just hate it.
- 'Cause it makes you feel

out of control and very unsafe.
- Yeah, I know.

- I know that.

- But I don't want to [BLEEP]
up everything.

- I know you don't. I know.

- I really don't.

- I know, Teddi.

- I just want to everything to
be great all the time.

- Teddi, you're a good person.

- Coming up...

- Get down.
Go to .....ing sleep.

- No.
- You got to go to bed.

You got to go to bed.
- No, I can't.

I'm very busy.

- Lay down!
- [laughs] I don't...

[upbeat electronic music]

♪ ♪

- It's okay.
They're just feelings.

It's what I tell my girls.

- I'm trying my best.
- It's okay to cry.

It's okay. We're human.

- I know. I know.

- Go get a good night's sleep.

- All right.

Ahh!
[laughs]

- If you had asked me
what this day

was going to be like,

I would never have been
able to say,

"It would be the highs
of the helicopter ride

to the lows
of a drunk despair."

- I'll see you in a second.
- Okay. All right.

Erika, are you okay?

- I look so terrible.
I hate my entire life.

No, it's okay. I just want
to make sure you're okay.

- Oh, I'm totally fine.
- Good. 'Cause I knew

that you never had a problem
with me being you, so I'm...

- Well, no. No, I
never...that's...

but I'm not gonna sit there
and, like, listen to this over

and over and over again.
Like, what are you guys doing?

- I know.

- Dorit!

Dorit!

- What?

- I need you to take a look at
me.

I'm a .....ing mental case.

What's the matter?

Ugh!

What's the matter?
What happened?

- Why do you live up here?
There's so many steps.

- You...you stuck me here.

- Why are you crying?

Don't cry. I love you.
Why are you crying?

- No. Everybody hates me.

- Who hates you?
- No. Everyone does.

- Teddi's having a hard time.

She just started to cry.

- About what?
- I kept getting down layers.

You know, I was down there
for a while, and I...

- Yeah. No, I heard you scream
in and out.

- Then there was another layer,

and then there
was another layer.

There's a lot of projection
going on

They don't feel like you like
being with them.

- [sighs]

- Oh, I love you
more than anything.

- [whimpers]
- Why do you say that?

I love you so much.
I literally love you so much.

You're like my little sister.
We're sisters.

- [inaudible] cry.

- Well, who would like being
with someone

that's trying to make
something out of nothing

and constantly trying
to hang sh... on you?

If you don't want me
in the group,

have the
.....ing ba*ls to say it.

- Yeah.
- But don't,

because I had a migraine, and I
had a bad day this morning

and worked through it,

and we had a good time
at the vineyard.

Don't hold that
against me tonight.

- Hopefully we can just all,
like,

you know,
co-exist and be fine.

- Come on. Lie down, sweetie.

Come on.
Just like the old days.

- [inaudible]
I hate all of you guys, but I...

- You got mad at me tonight.
- No.

- You got...
- Well, you must have...

- No, that's it. That's it.

- You must've said something
really mean.

You must have done something
horrible.

- This is my point with these
.....ing [inaudible]

I can't...
- You must've done something...

[crickets chirping]

- Rinna?
- What?

- Help.

- Wait, what the hell just
happened?

- I can't.

- Come here.
- Nope. I'm in bed.

'Cause they're disastrous.

No longer having control of
lifestyle.

- Teddi. Teddi.

- Nope.
- Teddi. What happened?

- No.

- Wait, guys,
what has happened?

- Go in there.

- Wait. Oh, Jesus Christ.

I'm literally wet out of the
.....ing bathtub.

You little .....ers,
what have you done?

- When you pay for the room...
- What the [BLEEP]?

I just got out of the bathroom.
What .....ing happened?

I can't get a moment's peace?

Get out of here. Go out.
[inaudible] anybody.

Get out. I want you girls
out of my bed now.

- Girls.
- Yo.

- Get out, Richards. [BLEEP]

- Ah! Get her out of my room.

- Teddi, come get
your big sister.

- You guys, go to bed.

- Why?

[both shouting indistinctly]

- Teddi?

Teddi? Teddi? Teddi?

- Yeah, you really need to find
out what happened to Teddi.

- Teddi?

- Kyle!
- Oh, my God.

Holy mother of God.

What's happening?

We're going to bed.

We're going to bed.
We're going to bed.

It's night-night time.

- Hold on. I need chips.
We're going night-night.

We're going night-night.

No, we're not having
a .....ing chip.

By the way, put that
.....ing chip down.

We're not having a chip.
We're going to bed.

And a-one and a-two.

- [inaudible]
Oh, sh...

[laughter]

- The fact that I, in my state,

am the one that has to help
Teddi up the stairs...

You're gonna regret this
tomorrow.

Shows
you how bad the situation is.

Okay, we'll talk about it.

- I'm gonna talk about it.
You want to talk about it?

Let's talk about it!

- Okay, step up.
I'm gonna k*ll you tomorrow.

That's it. You're done.
- No, that's fine.

Ugh.

I'm so hungry.

- No, you're not hungry.
You're not even .....ing hungry.

Get down. Go to .....ing sleep.

- No.
- You've got to go to bed.

You've got to go to bed.
- No, I can't.

I'm very busy.
- You've got to go to bed.

Don't move.
- Okay.

[laughs]

- Lay down!

- [laughs] I don't think I...

- Oh, man.

Are you kidding me?

.....ing lay still.
- [laughs]

- Next on "The Real Housewives
of Beverly Hills"...

- How do I...I don't even know
how to hold this.

If anybody's mad at me,

please point
these in the other direction.

- You don't think
she has fun with us?

You don't think she wants
to be here with us?

- But did I say
that last night?

- Yes, I believe you did.
- Ugh.

- I think you have
to talk to her.

- I wanted to start
by apologizing.

Sometimes when you seem,
like, irritated,

I think then I take it on.

- Who is this Teddi?

- Camille's house burned down.

- Wow.
- She's gonna probably come out

of this
being a much nicer girl.

- Yeah, maybe.

- You know that you said a few
things about Dorit, and you...

- Oh, yeah,
I've said some things.

I didn't trust you.

I didn't know where you were
getting all this money from.

- What are you talking about?

- People want to know
what I know.

- To learn more
about the housewives,