04x01 - Jerky Jasper

[bunniefuu]

[ Upjerky jaspertempo music plays ]

I got crumbs in my socks!

[dance music plays loudly]

[ Crash! Crash! ]
[ Grumbles ]

[ Crash! ]

[ Crash! ]

Pizza steve!
Turn that music down!

Sorry, bro.
I'm meditating.

Can you at least use headphones
or something?

Sorry, mr. Gus.
I don't see a headphones option.

Just one more final piece.

[ Crash! Rattle! ]

What's happening?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

[ Sighs ]
whew!

For a second there, I thought  
[ crash! ]

[ Gasps ]
oh, no!

Whoever's making
this place rumble

Is gonna get a scolding.
[ Ominous tone plays ]

[dance music continues]

Mr. Gus!

Who's making
the rv shake like so?

'Cause they're gonna get
a scolding!

See for yourself.

[ Rattle! Rattle! Rattle! ]

[ Electricity crackles,
music stops ]

Hey, what's
the big idea?

Pizza steve,
my project is ruined,

And it's all because
of your sick jams making

The house go "bomp bomp"
all night long.

So get ready
for a scolding.

Uncle g, wait!

It wasn't my fault.
It was mr. G  

Oh, don't you dare say
my name.

I wasn't gonna say you.

I was gonna say mister...
Um...

Jerky...jazz...
Purse.

Jerky...jaspers?

Yeah, my friend
jerky jasper, yep.

That's
what I'm going with.

You don't have
a friend named jerky jasper.

Yes, I do.
And he's a lot cooler than you.

He's really big,
has bat wings on his head,

Tank tracks for feet,
flames for a tail.

Does he have
a catfish for an arm?

Sure.

Jerky jasper sounds so cool
I'm not even mad anymore!

But I'd certainly love
to meet him.

Well,
you can't meet him.

He's...
Uh, he's imaginary.

Yeah, he's
my imaginary friend,

So you can't
even see him.

Because you don't have
a youthful mind.

But I totally have
a youthful mind.

[ Shploik! ]
[ Groans ]

Uhhh, see?

Eugh!
Did I say mind?
[ Groaning ]

I meant
"a youthful body."

Anyway, got to go.

Pizza steve.

[ Groaning continues ]

Pizza steve!

We've gone over this
before.

Uncle grandpa always falls
for your nonsense.

You know very well
he's gonna get obsessed,

And this situation is gonna get
out of control.

Uhhh...
[ Blubbers ]

All right, pizza steve,
I'm officially obsessed

And willing to push things
out of control.

Uncle grandpa,
don't listen to piz  

Stay out of this,
mr. Gus.

Let the big boys do
the talking.

Pizza steve...

Please let me meet
your imaginary friend!

Sorry, uncle g.

You just don't have
what it takes.

You have to actually
physically be young

To meet
my imaginary friend.

And since
you're super old,

Let's just move on
and never speak of him again.

Old, huh?

Belly bag,
say "ahh."

Ahh   ulp!

[ Ominous tones play ]

Gluh!

[ Groaning ]

All right!

So, pizza steve,
now can I meet

Your imaginary friend
jerky jasper?

Um...

Maybe later
when... I'm not so busy.

But I want
to meet him now!

It's not fair!

Mr. Gus, tell him!

Leave me out of this.

Getting too weird
for my blood, yo.

You're always taking
pizza steve's side.

Travis' parents let him hang out
with whoever he wants.

Well, then why don't you
go live with travis?

I work too hard
for this family  

[ Groans ]
what am I saying?

No, uncle g.

You're still
not young enough.

So stop being
such a baby about it.

"Baby," huh?

Belly bag,
say "ahh" again.

Oh, man.

[ Groaning ]

Goo goo morning!
Enough is enough.

I'm gonna find jerky jasper
once and for all.

Good luck with that.

You should be ashamed
of yourself.

Jerky!
Show yourself!

You in here?

Come out, come out,
wherever you are!

Hmm.
What did he look like again?

He had bat wings on his head,
a catfish for an arm,

Tank tracks for feet,
and flames for a tail.

Oh, there you are.

You really are
like pizza steve said.

Of course I am!

So, what else did
this pizza steve say about me?

Oh, just that it was you
that broke my rv in a bottle.

Pizza steve is
a big, fat liar.

I never broke
anything of yours.

But I know whose stuff
I will break.

Aah!

[ Slurping ]
you really are something,
pizza steve.

You're not going
to admit it, are you?

[ Slurps ]
admit what?

I mean,
what could go wrong?

[ Crash! Crash! ]

Uncle grandpa: I'm sure there's
a reasonable explanation.

Pizza steve would never lie
about anybody.

Who in the what
is baby g talking to?

Don't you guys see him?
He's standing right here.

Sorry, baby g, but pizza steve
isn't falling for this one.

Wait, is that the pizza steve
that said I broke your stuff?

It's time to teach you

To watch what you say
about other people.

Sounds like he wants
to give you scolding.

Listen, I have no idea
what you're talking about.

I don't see
or hear anything.

Now he's got ahold of one
of your second place trophies.

That was for burbank's strongest
pizza slice competition!

What's happening
to my room, bro?!

I'm so angry,
little grandpa!

This is for you, liar!
Aah!

My sound system!

I don't know
how you're doing this, uncle g,

But you owe pizza steve

What's going on?!

Payback is
what's going on.

You think you can drag
my name through the mud,

You little greasy slab
of cholesterol?

This is for blaming me
for something I never did!

[ Groaning ]
I'm confused.

Could someone please tell me
what's going on?

[ Splat! ]

He's angry at you,
pizza steve.

who's angry at me?

Someone enlighten me!

Can't you recognize your
imaginary friend, jerky jasper?

I guess he thinks
you were lying about him.

And if there's one thing
I can't stand, it's a liar!

Whoa!

[ Screams ]

[ Weakly ] mr. Gus,
get me out of this.

Oh, no.
I'm having way too much fun.

No, wait!

[ Screech! ]

[ Groaning ]
uncle g, help.

Why don't you just ask
jerky jasper to stop?

Uh...because
jerky jasper doesn't like

Me asking for favors?

[ Sighs ]

You can keep the hurt up as long
as you want, pizza steve.

Whoa! Whoa!

[ Panting ]

[ Coughs ]

Okay, uncle g.

Listen, I lied.

Jerky jasper didn't break
your model.

I did.

I'm sorry.

[ Farts ]
aaaaah!

You lied?!

[ Sobbing ]

Y you hurt my feelings!

[ Crying ]

Baby want milk!

Need to drown
my sorrows.

All right, that's it.

Pizza steve, it looks like
you've learned your lesson.

'Scuse me, belly bag.

[ Ominous tones play ]

W w wait!
I'm not finished yet!

Noooooo!

[ Weakly ]
am I still alive?

[ Splat! ]

Congratulations.

You're back to your old self,
uncle grandpa.

Literally.

Rockin' good news,
seã‘or gustavo.

Say, for some reason,
I got a mean hankering for milk.

[ Squeak! Thump! ]

Uncle g?

Yes, my little
greasy bundle?

I really have learned
my lesson this time.

I promise to tell the truth
from now on,

Which is why I've been meaning
to tell you  

I didn't break your model.

I was just covering for mr. Gus,
who really broke it.

Mr. Gus,
how could you?

What?
What'd he say?

The wait is over!

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[ Bass guitar plays ]

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Enough with the boring
elevator tune age, bro.

Ow!
[ Laughs ]

[ Rock music plays ]
♪ I am on ya ♪

♪ Like lasagna ♪

♪ A hot and messy slice
from california ♪

♪ I'm the cheesiest,
the greasiest ♪

♪ You got to believe
I'm incredible and edible ♪

♪ Pizza steve,
I'm pizza steve ♪

♪ You can't handle
my italian karate tactics ♪

♪ I'm pizza steve ♪

Tiny miracle: [ rapping ]
♪ my motherboard told me ♪

♪ "No microchips in bed ♪

♪ You got to eat with us
at the kitchen instead" ♪

♪ They always like to nag
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♪ But let's just face it ♪

Parents just don't have
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In order to understand.

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aaaaaaaaaaah!

♪ Magic and cauldrons
and evil spells ♪

♪ I got a potion
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♪ 'Cause I am evil ♪
wizard!

♪ Evil ♪
wizard!

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with a pair of evil scissors ♪

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[ Up tempo music plays ]

That was quite delicious.