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01x30 - Hide and Seek

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Uncle Grandpa". Aired: September 2, 2013 – June 30, 2017.*
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Uncle Grandpa is a magical shapeshifting person that stops by children's houses every day to see how they are doing.

01x30 - Hide and Seek

Post by bunniefuu »

[ Up-tempo music plays ]

Uncle grandpa: good morning!

Good morning.

Good morning.

Grft: [ roars ]

Uncle grandpa: good morning.

Good morning!

Mr. Gus: [ groaning

Nervously ]

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Grft: [ grumbles ]

[ Roars ]

Mr. Gus: aah!

Nice one, tiger.

You found me quick, girl!

But you still got to find that

Greasy pizza slice.

Uncle grandpa: you guys

Looking for pizza steve?

Pizza steve: uncle grandpa,

Don't give up my hiding place.

Uncle grandpa: that's not a

Hiding place.

That's called the side of my

Face.

Pizza steve: aw, man!

You totally blew my cover.

[ Grunts ]

Mr. Gus: so, what's shaking,

Uncle grandpa?

Uncle grandpa: I'm takin' a

Little break, sippin' an

Ice-cold glass of puddin'.

What're you guys up to?

Mr. Gus: the three of us are

In the midst of a nice friendly

Game of hide-and-seek.

Uncle grandpa: [ muffled

Shouting, gulps ]

Did you say hide-and-seek?

Mr. Gus: yeah. You should

Join us, uncle grandpa.

It's fun.

Uncle grandpa: fun?!

You think hide-and-seek is fun?!

Mr. Gus: yeah.

Uncle grandpa: it's a

Horrendous game, mr. Gus!

It's a dangerous, dangerous

Game!

Also, it's evil.

Grft: [ meows ]

Uncle grandpa: [ sobbing ]

Mr. Gus: what's the matter,

Uncle grandpa?

Uncle grandpa: I'll tell ya!

It's about my dear old friend

Tony.

Both: tony?

Uncle grandpa: many, many

Years ago, we would play

Hide-and-seek together.

But one time, when it was tony's

Turn to hide, I couldn't find

Him!

I tried so hard!

I searched everywhere -- up,

Down, all around.

But -- but I never found the

Poor guy!

[ Sobbing continues ]

From that day forward, I vowed

Never to play that wicked game

Again!

Mr. Gus: aw, come on,

Uncle grandpa, you need to get

Over your fear of hide-and-seek.

And there's no better way than

Playing with your best buds.

Uncle grandpa: no, mr. Gus!

It's
youthat must learn --

Learn to fear it!

I just can't lose you guys like

I lost my dear ol' tony!

Mr. Gus: but tony probably

Just got tired of hiding and

Went home.

Belly bag: I'm sure he's

Forgotten about the game by now,

So you should just forget about

Him.

Uncle grandpa: oh, no.

Not tony.

He'd never give up in the middle

Of hidin' and seekin'.

He had a real love for the game.

He could be such a bonehead

About it sometimes.

For the last time, I will never,

Ever play a single game of

Hide-and-seek for the rest of my

Life!

And nothing you can say will

Ever change my mind!

Pizza steve: but, uncle g,

You got to play it to slay it,

Bro.

Uncle grandpa: I'm in!

Mr. Gus: okay, you're the

Seeker, uncle grandpa.

You remember what to do, right?

Uncle grandpa: you just worry

About finding a hiding place,

Mr. Gus.

I think your uncle grandpa

Remembers how to count to 10.




Mr. Gus: ah, yeah.

[ Chuckles ]

Pizza steve: uh, mr. Gus,

This is myhiding place.

Belly bag: actually, you both

Need to leave.

I was here first.

Grft: [ roars ]

Pizza steve: aw, man!

Tiger, too?

Uncle grandpa: 17, hot dog,


Ready or not, here comes

Grandpa!

Hmm.

But which way did they go?

Oh, thataway, huh?

Thanks, hand chair.

Pizza steve?

Belly bag, is that you?

Hold it.

Very clever hiding spot,

Mr. Gus, but you can't fool your

Old uncle grandpa!

I happen to know that you like

Salty foods, which means...

You're hiding in the salt

Shaker!

Mr. Gus?

Mr. Gus?

Well, he's not in the salt

Shaker.

Must be in this bottle of

Mongolian fire-punch hot juice.

Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

Mr. Gus: sounds like

Uncle grandpa is having a hard

Time.

Belly bag: give him a chance,

Guys.

I know he's gonna find us.

Uncle grandpa: guys?

Mr. Gus?

[ Inhales ]

Pizza steve?

[ Gulps ]

Where could they be?

[ Grunts ]

Tiger?

Have you seen belly bag?

Mr. Gus: maybe this was a bad

Idea.

Pizza steve: this is taking

Way too long.

Belly bag: but this is the

Only way we can help

Uncle grandpa get over his fear

Of hide-and-seek.

You guys just watch.

I bet he finds us in a matter of

Minutes.

Uncle grandpa: guys?!

Guys?!

[ Whimpering ]

Guys?!

I can't find them!

I lost my friends just like I

Lost tony!

[ Sobbing ]

This is terrible!

How could I have let this

Happen?!

[ Bone cracks ]

Huh?

[ Gasps ]

What's this?!

T-t-t-t-t-tony?!

I can't believe this!

You haven't changed a bit,

Buddy.

Good ol' skeletony.

Oh, buddy!

I'm so happy I finally found

You!

Doesn't seem like you've

Been looking, uncle grandpa.

I've been down here for decades!

Uncle grandpa: now that

You mention it, I guess I have

Moved on with my life, but I'm

Glad I found you anyway.

You're glad you found me

Anyway?!

You've got a lot of nerve.

I've wasted my life waiting for

You to find me!

And now you're gonna pay, buddy.

Uncle grandpa: tony, no!

I hate hide-and-seek!

Uncle grandpa, you'd better

Hope I never find you!

Uncle grandpa: [ gasps ]

The seeker has become the hider!

I got to find a place to hide!

There you are!

Uncle grandpa: [ whimpers ]

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Hold the door, old friend!

Huh?

Uncle grandpa: sorry, tony.

Elevator's full.

All: good mornin'!

Uncle grandpa: where to hide?

Where to hide?!

Together: uncle grandpa!

Mr. Gus: you found us!

Uncle grandpa: uh, yeah, I

Guess I did.

Belly bag: sounds like you've

Finally overcome your fear of

Hide-and-seek!

Uncle grandpa: not exactly.

I finally found tony, and he

Wants to k*ll me!

[ All gasp ]

Shh!

He's right there.

Uncle grandpa?

You can't hide from me.

I remember all your favorite

Hiding spots!

Gotcha!

Huh?! What the --

Stay out of the hair!

Fear not, old buddy.

I won't give up as easily as you

Did.

Uncle grandpa: I'm a goner.

Under the cushions.

Classic grandpa move.

Hmm.

Guess I'm gonna have to tear

Apart everything in this rv

Until I find you!

[ Squeals ]

Uncle grandpa: we're all

Doomed!

Uncle grandpa!

Come out, come out, wherever you

Are!

[ All whimpering ]

What the --

[ Whimpering continues ]

[ Laughs evilly ]

Aha!

I found you!

[ All scream ]

And now I'm gonna hide you!

I'm gonna hide you forever.

Uncle grandpa: oof!

Now that that game is ancient

History, who else wants to play?

[ All screaming ]

Uncle grandpa: ancient

History?

Sounds like tony's giving up on

Our game!

What's gotten into him?

Uncle grandpa: hey, bonehead!

Huh?

Uncle grandpa: I thought you

Had a love for the game.

What are you talking about?

I love hide-and-seek.

Uncle grandpa: well, you just

Gave up on our game, and that

Sounds like hide-and-seek hater

Behavior to me!

But I don't hate the game.

Uncle grandpa: oh, yeah?

Prove it by putting my friends

Down and finding a sweet hiding

Spot!

You're on, uncle grandpa!

I'm gonna prove that no one

Loves hide-and-seek more than

Good ol' skeletony!

[ Laughing ]

Belly bag: way to go,

Uncle grandpa!

Pizza steve: played and

Slayed.

Mr. Gus: yeah, that was

Really clever how you used

Tony's love of the game against

Him so that he'd go hide away

Forever, huh?

Uncle grandpa?

Uncle grandpa: hot dog,

Hot dog, 7, 10!

Ready or not, tony, here comes

Grandpa!

No! No! No! No!

Mr. Gus: [ roars ]

Uncle grandpa: okay,

Belly bag, ready to hit the open

Road?

Belly bag: I can already

Taste the exhaust fumes!

Are your mirrors in place?

Uncle grandpa: yep, lookin'

Good!

Belly bag: how's the

Steering?

Uncle grandpa: very

Responsive.

Belly bag: c.b. Radio?

Uncle grandpa: oh, I

Definitely see bees.

Belly bag: always buckle

Your snake belt!

Uncle grandpa: huh?

[ Snake hisses ]

Belly bag: ignition!

[ Engine turns over ]

And don't forget to bring an

Ample supply of chewing gum for

The long drive.

Uncle grandpa: got it right

On the dash, buddy.

Hey, wait.

I don't have a quarter!

Hey, mr. Gus, can I borrow some

Change?

Mr. Gus: aw, no,

Uncle grandpa, not after what

Happened the last time.

Uncle grandpa: how about you,

Pizza steve?

You got a quarter?

Pizza steve: mm, yeah, sorry,

Uncle g, but I'm broke and it

Ain't no jo-- ouch!

Uncle grandpa: found one!

Mr. Gus: no joke, huh?

Uncle grandpa: thanks for the

Quarter, pizza steve.

I'll pay you back next paycheck.

[ Glass shatters ]

[ Both munching ]

Okay, belly bag, let's roll!

[ Tires screeching ]

Yo, check this out!

[ Breathes deeply ]

Belly bag: pretty cool,

Uncle grandpa!

Uncle grandpa: oh, man, this

Is a good one!

[ Breathes deeply ]

Whoa!

Hey, guys!

Check it out!

Mr. Gus: uh-oh.

Uncle grandpa's blowin' bubbles

Again!

Pizza steve: run!

Grft: [ growls ]

Pizza steve: stay back!

Stay back!

Not the headshots!

Please, not the headshots!

Mr. Gus: [ grunting ]

Uncle grandpa --

Uh-oh!

Uncle grandpa?

Uncle grandpa: I wish the

g*ng was catching this!

Man, who busted my bubble?!

Guys, guys!

You'll never believe what just

Happened.

Mr. Gus: oh, I think I could

Hazard a guess!

You blew a bubble so big, it

Ripped apart the rv, which

Carried us into deep space, then

Blew up in all our face and

Stranded us out here on the

Rings of saturn!

Uncle grandpa: wow!

That was a really good guess,

Mr. Gus!

Pizza steve: it was a lucky

Guess, if you ask me.

Now, more importantly, how are

We getting back to earth?

I got to replace my pizza steve

Headshots asap!

Uncle grandpa: we'll be back

In no time.

We just got to get chewin'!

Good mornin'!