11x01 - Up The Spout Again

[bunniefuu]

[tense music]

Did you at least have a nice motel?

-Yeah. -No.

Wait, wait, wait. Wow, wait!

Would you like to stay?

Why don't you trust me?

Experience tells me not to.

You give me your phone number right now.

Or you don't call back again.

[theme music]

-[Sally's friend] How are you? -Fine.

-Is Sally home? -No.

She's not?

No. I mean, she doesn't live here.

You got the wrong number.

You mean this has been a wrong number all this time?

Right from the beginning.

Wait, wait. You want me to tell you my life history

and I don't even know your name?

This whole thing is crazy.

No, what's crazy is that we haven't met yet.

I just think it's better if I don't call you anymore.

I really don't want to get involved with anybody,

no matter how nice they sound on the phone.

Is bad sex better than no sex at all?

Which is what you're having.

Okay, end of conversation.

You know, what I think you should do is start dating.

I don't want a date.

Then don't call it dating.

Just say that you're going out with nice, handsome men.

[keyboard clicking]

You know, this is so much information

to take it all at once.

Do you think

that maybe you could slow it down a little bit?

So maybe you could just come by and we could share some wine.

Paula.

I'm married with kids.

Michael, is your teacher here yet?

[Karen] Come on down and meet her.

Uhm, honey, this is Paula.

Paula, I'd like you to meet my husband.

I think we've met before.

What is she doing?

Didn't I tell you?

-I told you. -Told me what?

We're giving her a lift to Doom Lake.

Doom Lake? Do you know how far Doom Lake is?

I'm sure I told you.

How far is it to Doom Lake?

I don't know. A few hours?

Oh, it's just a few hours, and then we'll be alone, honey.

You didn't tell me.

-I told you. -You didn't.

I told you, honey.

Oh, you poor thing. Does it hurt?

-Are you in pain? -Oh, I'm fine.

I'm just sorry I spoiled your vacation.

We need a room. Well, she needs a room.

We only got one left.

I really think it's awfully dangerous

to drive in this rain.

Yeah, well, I'll be okay.

Stay at the motel.

Don't drive back here in this weather.

Well, I'll wait till it lits up a little bit.

[rain tapping]

[screaming] Oh! Oh, no!

This is like a bad dream.

[thunder roaring]

You.

did not

see me

with Nagata.

[Paige] First, Nagata has a freak accident,

then Rick Hawkins has a freak accident.

Well, I don't want to be one of your freak accidents.

I have this post office key,

and I need to find out which box it belongs to.

You forgot your box number?

Well, no, I never had it,

but the key belonged to a friend of mine who died.

I'm sorry. I really have no way of tracing it.

If you could find a cancelled check,

maybe that would help.

Next.

[tense music]

[suspenseful music]

[cars honking]

[male voice on megaphone] Wait! Hey! Hey! Hey!

[suspenseful music]

But the key was stolen

and Ted was with Nagata just before he died.

And he was with Rick Hawkins the night he died.

You just had to realize that there's no evidence of foul play

concerning those two deaths.

[rain falling]

[thunder roaring]

[Mack] I won't get any satisfaction

when you come to realize

that I was right about Greg.

Because by then, it will be too late to matter.

[Paige] And now Rick Hawkins' disappeared.

But before he did, he sent me this key.

Who's Rick Hawkins?

Yo.

[thunder roaring]

Come on back to bed.

Hey!

[thunder roaring]

[gasping for air]

[tense music]

You!

Hey, wait, wait a minute.

[car honking]

Hey!

Everything I told you about it was true.

-Wasn't it? -Give me a break.

You're not gonna believe him, are you?

[Ted] Come on, Paige.

You wouldn't be running out in the rain

if you weren't afraid of him.

Two-bit psychology, Ted.

Nobody's accused me of m*rder.

Paige!

[rain falling]

You're making a big mistake.

[rain falling]

[thunder roaring]

[Paige] Please leave a message

when you hear the tone,

and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

[beep]

[Greg's voice] It's me. Are you there?

First you tell me that you think

that Ted Melcher is a homicidal maniac,

then you run off with him.

Sounds like an eighth grade thing to do.

Call me when you get in.

[hangs up loudly]

If you get in.

Why'd you run away?

This is not an unreasonable question.

What happened in the past few hours

to make you believe he's more dangerous than I am?

-Who says I believe you? -You're in my car.

Now, what happened?

-We had a fight. -About?

-That's my business. -Mine too, maybe.

Maybe.

He burglarized my apartment.

What did he take?

-[Ted] What did he take? -[Paige] I don't know!

[Ted] Then how do you know he burglarized your apartment?

Because I found what he took.

-Was it the key? -What key?

Don't pretend, the key Rick Hawkins sent you.

What are you talking about?

Paige, what did you do with it?

-I don't have it. -Where is it?

I left it there.

-Where? -At his house.

You left it at his house. Why?

Because he woke up and I ran away.

Okay, Mr. Hero?

If it's so damned important to you,

why don't you go get it?

Why don't you go knock on the door and say,

"Greg, I want that key you stole from Paige,

"because I'm afraid that it might open something

that proves that I am a m*rder*r."

It's very reassuring to know

that you had my safety and well-being in mind

when you drove all the way out to the ranch, Ted.

I did not steal the key.

Greg did.

Why?

Think.

Rick Hawkins forged the papers on the Murakame Corporation.

Then your boyfriend is afraid of a paper trail

leading straight to his wife.

And if it reaches his wife, it reaches him.

Now, for all we know,

Greg already found whatever Hawkins had on it.

[rain hitting the windshield]

Are you sure you didn't bring that key with you?

Go to hell.

You will understand if I take everything you say

with a grain of salt.

The feeling's mutual, Ted.

After all, you have lied at least three times

I can think of since you got my car tonight.

You bring out the best in me.

It makes me wonder if your apartment

was ever even burglarized.

Satisfied?

What did the key open?

If I knew whatever you were afraid of,

do you think I'd hide it?

If I had any kind of evidence against you,

don't you think I'd have broadcast it by now?

What kind of key was it?

Key?

How should I know?

He stole it before I had a chance to use it.

Can you get off my back and go home?

Where was it when you found it?

In his bedroom

in a dish with his cufflinks.

Now, don't let me keep you, Ted.

Goodbye.

[phone ringing]

Please leave a message when you hear the tone

and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

[beep]

[Greg] Talk to me, kiddo. For your own good.

Talk to me.

[rain hitting the windshield]

Listen, we can play hide and seek,

kick the can, whatever you want later.

But right now, pick up the phone.

Well, at least be smart about one thing.

Don't give the key to Melcher.

[beep]

You lied.

Give it to me.

-Give it to me. -No.

-Now. Give it to me. -Ted, get away from me.

-No, no! -I'm through playing games.

Now, where is it?

Okay.

Take the damn key.

I'll tell Greg you have it,

and the two of you can fight over it.

[door slamming]

[thunder roaring]

I know she isn't home.

If she is, she hasn't been answering the phone.

[knocking]

Just open it.

Mmh?

-Open it. -I thought we'd be prudent.

You know, just in case.

I mean,

she hasn't been receiving any visitors

since she's indisposed to, you know...

This is it, here you are, sir.

Holy cow.

[door slams]

Anybody here?

[splatter of rain]

[suspenseful music]

[clicking on dial]

Carlos, did Paige call?

No.

If she calls me, you can reach me in the car.

Very well, sir.

[suspenseful music]

[window squeaks]

[suspenseful music]

[sighs]

-Good morning. -Good morning.

Here, let me save you a few steps.

-There you go. -Thanks. Have a nice day.

You too.

Post master.

Post master, post master, post master, post...

Post master.

Central Bank. Paid to the order of any bank.

[sighs]

[knocking]

Carlos.

[knocking]

Carlos, you in there?

Is anything wrong, sir?

My door's locked.

Let me try.

[suspenseful music]

Are you all fine?

Are you a friend of Rick's?

A relative.

I am so sorry.

It was a terrible tragedy.

I knew Rick. I really did like him.

You are...?

Uh, Paige, his sister.

I'm Donna Sadler.

I'm a real estate agent.

I sold your brother this house.

Oh.

Rick, uh...

Rick really loved this place.

[Donna] I know he did.

Is the family gonna put it on the market?

Oh, we haven't decided yet.

Well, I know this is the last thing

you wanna think about right now,

but if you should decide to sell

I would love to handle the property for you.

I'm already familiar with it, and I have several clients

who are looking for a place just like this.

Okay, thank you.

And if you have to sell the place in Spring Lake,

I'd be happy to recommend a broker up there.

Spring Lake?

The cabin.

At Spring Lake.

[Donna] Everybody's moving up there these days.

Spring Lake's really become a hot spot.

[suspenseful music]

[birds chirping]

[sighs]

So, you're a free woman.

Oh, good. I can't wait to get out of here.

-No, no, no. -Help me. Help me get up.

You have to wait for the wheelchair.

Oh...

-Insurance regulation. -I can walk.

No. You got to do it. You got to wait.

-So, what did you-- -What are you gonna--

You go ahead.

No, go ahead. What were you going to say?

-No, I wasn't saying anything. -Okay.

How did you sleep?

I didn't.

I, I'm okay though.

I just really feel awful about spoiling your vacation.

-It's nothing. -No...

Did you at least have a nice motel?

-Yeah. -No.

Well, it wasn't nice, exactly.

No, it really,

it really wasn't that bad, actually.

Alright, here we go.

-Just be careful of my-- -Okay.

But it's not a big deal, I can...

I just need a little... Mack!

Oh, my goodness.

[laughing]

Ooh. Sorry.

We could drop you off at the lodge on the way.

No, I'm taking a bus.

Well, you don't have to do that.

-No, I want to. -She wants to.

-Well, are you sure? -Yeah, I'm sure.

Okay, off we go.

Okay.

How did you find me?

Never mind. I don't care how you found me.

Just leave me alone.

No, do not come over.

Do not!

Look, if I had wanted you to find me,

I'd have given you my phone number.

I'm trying to get it together, and I want you out of my life.

[tense music]

[phone ringing]

-Yeah. -Oh, I'm so glad you're there.

I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been.

What's the matter?

Oh!

I just had to call you.

[Gary] Why?

I needed to hear a friendly voice.

-What happened? -Nothing.

Nothing?

Not really.

Wait a minute. Something happened,

and you want to talk to somebody about it.

So you might as well talk to me. So tell me.

I don't want you to think I'm flaky.

Too late for that.

[chuckles] Thanks a lot.

-[sighs] Goodbye. -Gary!

Look, this is a great relationship we have.

You called me to not tell me your problem.

I didn't call you to tell you anything.

I just wanted to talk.

Aha. Yeah, well, I gotta go.

Bye.

Hey, wait!

sh**t.

Well, bye.

I hope it doesn't give you any more pain.

Are you sure we can't drop you off?

Yeah, I'm sure. Bye.

Bye.

Paula seemed nervous to you?

Why?

-Oh! Nervous. -I'm sorry.

Nervous?

Well, not nervous exactly.

Out of sorts.

Who?

Paula.

I didn't notice.

Maybe she's just tired.

Maybe.

Or worried.

-About what? -I don't know.

Preoccupied. Isn't she giving a lecture tonight?

Yeah, I think so.

Oh, then that's it.

She's probably just thinking about the lecture.

Yeah, probably.

[loud thuds]

Just sit up. Sit up.

But she did seem nervous.

I didn't notice.

[engine starting]

That was Danny on the phone.

Oh, how's he doing?

He had to cancel for tonight.

Why?

He's sick.

Oh, that's too bad.

At least that's what he says.

What do you mean, at least that's what he says?

Is he sick or is he not?

Well, he says that he's in bed with hay fever.

Oh, that poor thing.

It's just that I've read that we've had record low levels

of pollen the last few days.

Well, now, maybe he's allergic to something else,

and he just doesn't know it.

Stop it.

Hey, kids! What you got, huh?

This is for you.

For me?

This is for you.

Oh, thank you very much.

They got to choose.

Ooh, and they chose very well.

I love it.

Oh! We'll blow bubbles after lunch, huh?

Come on, babies, let's go inside.

-I'll see you later, Gary. -Okay.

Would you like to stay for lunch?

I love to, but I can't.

Oh, expecting an important phone call?

From a certain person of the female persuasion.

What about this Danny fella?

I'm sorry, Gary, I gotta to run.

-Yeah, bye. -Bye!

-Val! Val! -Yeah?

Honey, I signed for this while you were out today.

-Oh, thank you. -You're welcome.

Bye.

Hi, Pat.

Hi, Gary. How are you?

Can't complain.

Gary. What is this?

No car phone?

What does the person do when she wants to reach you?

Not you too.

[Pat chuckles] Yes, me too.

We're all dying to know who's at the other end

of those hot telephone conversations.

They are not hot telephone conversations.

And how did you know about it?

Was it supposed to be a secret?

Well, it wasn't supposed to be broadcast.

-Well, Frank and Mack. -Frank and Mack?

Yeah.

They say that you're practicing

the ultimate safe sex.

Oh, good, great.

Well, I'm glad to be the source of a little levity

in the neighborhood.

I'm sorry, It was a terrible joke.

It's just that we're all dying to meet her.

Who is she?

[sighs] I don't know.

Oh, Gary, I'm not gonna tell.

No, I don't know. Really.

This is weird, Gary.

She calls you.

But you don't know who she is.

[sighs] She won't tell me her name.

And you put up with that?

Well, if she won't tell me her name,

I don't have much choice, do I?

Well, you could hang up the phone if you want to.

The next thing you're going to tell me

is that you're not being judgmental.

-Right? -Gary.

It's your life.

It just seems to me that maybe

you've spent enough time with crazy women.

I'll see you later.

I've got to go to work.

I'm gonna run now.

[engine starting]

[phone ringing]

Please leave a message after the tone. Thanks.

[beep]

[Sally's friend] Gary, are you there?

Gary.

[sighs] Darn.

[Sally's friend sighs]

I opened up the fridge

and I found myself face to face

with this big chunk of broccoli.

And I asked myself,

Am I up to dealing with this broccoli,

or do I just throw some frozen thing

into the microwave?

Or do I just have toast?

Or do I call Gary?

You know, it occurred to me

that you might write letters,

or challenge your checkbook,

or polish your shoes while you and I talk on the phone.

I wouldn't know if you did,

but I guess it doesn't really matter.

The only thing that matters is a warm body

on the other end of the line, right?

Wrong.

Gary, were you listening in?

That's all I ever do, isn't it?

-That's not true. -Yeah, it is.

You sound like there's something wrong

with wanting to talk to a friend.

I think that you think it's unmacho

to admit that everybody needs a sympathetic ear.

My turn?

[sighs] Yes.

Don't give me this macho stuff.

Your conversations are all one sided.

In my book, talking is listening too.

-I listen. -Yeah, you listen.

You listen to see if I'm still on the other end of the line.

You listen when you want company.

But what if I want to talk?

I've got to wait for you to call.

[sighs]

You know, this used to be fun, but not anymore.

What are you afraid of?

Okay.

You give me your phone number right now,

or you don't call back again.

Goodbye.

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

Quit calling here.

-Gary? -I said--

I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

[Gary] Yeah, I'm fine. What do you want?

Well,

I just called to...

To talk.

Yeah, ask on.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure. What is it?

I'm not interrupting anything?

Not anything I don't wanna have interrupted.

Now what is it?

Well, I guess it's better

if I just come right out with it, okay?

I'm depressed because I got stood up tonight.

-Want me to hire a hit man? -Stop it.

No.

Danny called to tell me that he was sick.

Well, wait a minute. Let me see.

Uhm. Notification with the legitimate excuse

does not constitute being stood up.

I know.

But you don't believe him.

Well, I...

You want to call him on it?

[Val] Well...

-Look, do you like the guy? -Yep.

Is he worth the effort?

-Yes. -Well.

It's better to find out sooner rather than later

if somebody's being straight with you, right?

-Right. -Damn right.

Thanks.

Anytime.

[dramatic music]

[Gary] How's your leg?

Starting to throb again.

You want me to stop?

No, no, just get home as quickly as possible.

Okay.

[sighs]

Listen, I don't think I mentioned about last night.

You see, well,

there was only one room at the motel

where we were staying.

There was only one vacant.

You know, the others were booked.

So, you see...

Uhm.

So Paula and I had to use the same room.

Karen.

What did you say?

I said there was only one room last night at the motel.

A nice motel?

What?

Was it a nice motel?

It was a motel.

What does whether or not it was nice

have to do with what I'm trying to tell you?

Nice mice.

-I'm glad. -What?

I said I'm glad.

About what?

That it was a nice motel.

Who said it was nice?

I thought you did.

Oh, I'm sorry.

You know what, honey? It's really hard

to hear back here.

So how was the motel?

I said it was fine.

That's good.

[suspenseful music]

[police officer] Okay, you understand me?

I want you to get that license.

Okay? You understand me?

-Excuse me, officer. -Just a minute.

And tell that brother of yours

you better show up at the next poker game...

I'm in a hurry.

...some of that money or I'm gonna stop him

for leaving the scene of a crime.

Now get out of here.

How can I help you?

Oh, where's the post office? I'm in a hurry.

There's no need to hurry.

Yes, there is.

Okay, then. I'll take you.

No, no, you don't have to do that.

I want to.

I just got off duty,

and I'm free for the rest of the night.

Or, you know, the rest of the year.

Whatever is necessary.

[chuckles] Uhm.

Okay, look, look.

See? It doesn't open up again until 8:00 in the morning.

That's why I said there was no need to hurry.

Well, until then, you wanna have dinner with me?

And then maybe breakfast later.

Are you this helpful with all the tourists?

Well, you know, the Chamber of Commerce

says we should put our best foot forward.

And I'm usually very selective about who I ask to dinner,

and even more so about breakfast.

[chuckles] Well, I'll take a rain check.

Now, where is the nearest motel?

Be still my heart.

You big city women,

you move so fast.

I mean, for me.

I knew that.

I knew that. Follow my car.

[car engine revving]

[mysterious music]

[tapping on glass]

[phone ringing]

Please leave a message after the tone. Thanks.

[beep]

[Sally's friend] Gary, please pick up the phone.

Okay, have it your way.

But I hope you've got a lot of tape on this machine.

I haven't had a lot of luck with men.

This is embarrassing. Please pick up the phone.

What if someone else listens to this tape?

Wait a minute, I can't hear myself.

[metallic whirring outside]

I'm back. Look.

What it comes down to, I guess.

I don't trust men. Why do I say I guess?

I don't. I don't.

I know.

You might be the nicest man in the world,

but that's like saying you're the prettiest fighter,

or the fastest snail.

From what I understand, your luck with women

is only a little bit better than my luck with men.

So.

So... I don't know. So...

Excuse me if I'm not too eager

to jump into another relationship,

friendship, whatever, love affair,

with another person of your gender.

Experience tells me not to.

However.

However.

If you still want to meet me, let's meet.

It's not exactly giving you my name and phone number

but it's a start.

Hi. I just walked in the door.

Like hell you did.

What's this about meeting?

[sighs]

Well, let's do it.

Now.

-What? -Right now.

-Now? -Tonight.

Alright.

Alright.

[laughing]

[knocking]

[knocking]

[knocking]

Just a minute.

[grunts]

Just a minute.

Okay.

Oh...

-Hi. -Hi.

Uhm. Give me a second to put on some clothes.

Count to five and come on in.

Okay?

Okay?

I wasn't expecting you.

Well, is this not a convenient time?

What?

Should I?

Should I go?

No, no. Come on in.

And make yourself at home. I'm glad you're here

Are you sure?

What?

I said, are you sure that you're glad that I'm--

Yes, yes, of course I'm sure.

-Why do you have to ask? -I don't know.

I just...

-You got a nice apartment. -Well, thanks.

Yeah, you got some really nice things.

It was pretty furnished.

It came that way.

Oh, here.

Brought you some chicken soup.

Oh, thanks.

That's very nice. Thanks.

It's still hot.

I'd love some. Thank you.

Okay.

I'll go get that.

So.

Been sick?

What?

You've been sick.

Oh, I've been miserable.

[clinking of utensils]

Allergies, huh?

Well, you know, at first I thought it was allergies

but I think it's a cold.

[Val chuckles]

Of what I smell of it,

it smells great.

-[chuckles] Try some. -I will.

This is just what the doctor ordered.

Oh.

That's perfect.

That really hits the spot.

God, I'm glad you're sick.

What?

Oh, no, of course I'm not glad you're sick.

I don't believe I said that.

I just meant that I'm glad...

What?

I'm just glad that you told me the truth.

And why wouldn't I tell...?

What if it is a cold?

I'll take my chances.

[romantic music]

Hey, wait a minute.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait, wait.

[chuckles]

Uhm.

Would you like to...?

[chuckles]

What?

Would you like to stay?

No.

You sure?

No.

[door closes]

[sneezes]

What do you think, Chester?

Mmh? Yes? Maybe?

No, no, no. I think I'm too easy.

Wait.

Do I care if he thinks I'm easy?

Yes, yes, yes, I care. Okay.

How about...?

The village idiot.

Mmh...

Well, let's see.

Uh...

How about this?

You think it makes me look fat?

[barking]

Oh, Chester. Who do you know?

Move over.

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

Hello?

How dressy are you dressing?

I've got my tux out.

Okay, that's it. I'm gonna be too self-conscious.

Will you relax?

You're making me nervous.

-You're not the nervous type. -I am tonight.

Really?

Really.

That makes me feel better.

Yeah, well, that makes me feel worse.

I waited so long for this.

I am like a high school kid on his first date.

So do I. Isn't it awful?

Don't you hate it?

Well...

What well? What do you mean well?

Well, there are a lot of good things about a first date.

Name one.

Sometimes you get a second date.

[chuckles]

God, you're romantic.

[chuckles]

I've been called worse.

See ya.

See ya.

[sighs] You can't have those.

Alright. Do you want these?

[indistinct chattering]

Small world, hey?

Overcrowded, I'd say.

Where's the key?

What key?

The key that Page took from me and gave to you.

Is that the same one you stole from Paige?

I don't steal, I acquire.

-The key. -Sorry, Mr. Sumner.

I'm on vacation.

Empty your pockets.

Empty my pockets?

That's good. Did you practice that,

looking in the mirror on the freeway coming up here?

You're gonna break a beer bottle over my head

and make me?

I don't break beer bottles over people's head.

Billy does.

Billy, I want you to meet Ted. Ted, this is Billy.

How you doing, Ted?

Pleased to meet you.

Why don't you and Billy have another beer?

[Greg] Hey, the drinks are on Ted.

[everyone cheering]

[suspenseful music]

[keys clanking]

[groans]

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

I was on my way out the door.

Don't get angry.

You're not backing out.

I'm not backing out. I just wanted to--

Wanted to what? Come on.

I just wanted to, before we actually got together,

to ask...

Ask what?

Do you have any second thoughts?

About what?

About us getting together?

No. Absolutely none whatsoever.

What if it doesn't work out?

How can it not work out?

What if we don't like one another?

What if we like one another more than we do now?

[sighs] Well, if it doesn't work out,

it could mean the end of a terrific friendship.

On the other hand, we could become better friends

than we are now.

How could you not give yourself that chance?

Well...

[knocking on door]

Oh, somebody's here.

Hang on a minute.

[ominous music]

-[male voice] Hi. -How did you find me?

[male voice] I thought you'd be glad to see me.

[Sally's friend] You were wrong.

[male voice] You know, you don't want

to hurt my feelings.

[Sally's friend] You have to go. I'm on the phone.

Go? Yeah, I'll go.

I'll go, and I'm good and ready to go.

What are you doing?

Get out of here. No!

[Chester barking]

Hey. What?

[Sally's friend screaming] I'm going to call the police!

Your number. Say your number.

Tell me your number.

[Sally's friend screaming] No, no! You psycho!

Your name. Say say your name. What's your name?

Hey!

[disconnect tone]

[male narrator] Next on Knots Landing.

We have no more means of finding this person than you do.

Lady.

This woman could be dead.

[tense music]

I don't want him over here anymore.

I need friends, too.

See? I told you she doesn't like us.

Give me the right key now, Ted.

That's the key Page gave me.

If you don't tell me the truth, I'm going to have Billy here

draw you to kind of bed that Rick Hawkins

was found floating around.

[theme music]