03x10 - Grim Reaper II

[bunniefuu]

- [Narrator] Hello again my monstrosities.

There's strange doings in the garage.

Welcome to the Curse of the Hearse, part two.

Failure number one team has come back from the dead.

- Every time somebody sees me

or recognizes me from "Monster Garage"

and says, "Oh, you were on the losing team."

- Everybody has given me crap about it.

- How come you failed?

- [Narrator] They're here to breathe new life

into another old hearse.

- I always said if I could ever get a second chance

and come out and do it, I would.

- [Narrator] So get your fright on, it's trick or treat

in the Monster Garage.

- They're gonna get this car done.

I need this monkey off my back.

[monkey screeches]

- [Narrator] Join us now as Jesse and his g*ng

of maverick mechanics rip, grind, and burn,

transforming ordinary street vehicles

into monster machines in the "Monster Garage".

[upbeat rock music]

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster garage

The challenge take a 1954 Cadillac hearse

and turn it into a grizzly, gruesome grave digger.

New garage, new rules.

When built, the monster machine

must still appear to be stock.

The team will now have $5,000 to spend on parts

and be limited to just one freebie.

They have seven days and nights.

On the first day they design,

for the next five they build

and on the seventh, the monster challenge.

If successful, they walk away with a $3,400 set of Mac Tools

and the clock starts now.

[clock shatters]

The design team rolls up in George Barris's

famous Munster Koach to find the curse of the hearse

is alive and well.

Somewhere between '54 and '03,

this Caddy gave up the ghost.

The motor and transmission of this little beauty, are DOA.

Right away team leader, Jesse James,

tries to steer this project away

from the specter of another failure.

- I think we need to like refine this build

and simplify it a little bit

and figure out the elements that are gonna make it work

and eliminate the stuff that isn't,

doesn't have anything to do with building the car, you know.

And I know, George is cool

and nice to bring all this stuff down here

and the Munster's Koach and the Batmobile

and all that stuff,

but it's not gonna help 'em.

You know, they're gonna fail again.

- Well, that was the choice of the production crew.

Well, I'll do whatever you want to do.

- Without me there would be no production crew, so.

Well, let's design this thing.

- The first hearse was supposed to be a monster car crusher,

tearing the life and soul out of any four wheeler

that got in its way.

This time Jesse's got a grave new idea.

Dig we must.

Once again, George Barris, the godfather of the custom car

and the creator of the Batmobile is on the design team.

- I got a different concept.

He's going back to what he really wanted to do.

He really wanted to dig the hole

and put the casket in

instead of having cars come out

and butcher up cars.

- [Narrator] Holy distraction.

The last time George was in the garage,

the build team went a bit batty,

but this time Barris vows the outcome will be different.

- The challenge is here, our team is ready to go.

We will produce this time.

We will not have grim ripper number two in the crusher.

[expl*si*n]

- This car's just a shell.

We gotta do the power brakes, motor, trans,

wheels, tires, rear suspension.

So what we'll do is we'll solid mount the rear

like a regular tractor Bobcat, no suspension.

So I want it to dig the hole,

push the casket out into the hole

and then put like a snowplow or something on the front,

you know, we'll make one kind of cool looking

and that'll come around and push the dirt over.

- We have the backhoe in the back

and the casket in front of it.

How are we gonna get that out of there?

- [Narrator] Returning in hopes of redemption,

Doran Hirschkorn is back to right the wrongs

of last season's failure.

- And when I came out here again, you know,

don't fail like you did last time

and you know, everybody just has to get a dig in

and, you know, put salt on the wound.

It's been tough and to come out here

and redeem myself a little bit, I mean,

I'm definitely looking forward to it.

To conceal it, we either have to swing it around 180 degrees

or have this thing slide out.

- How far did this go up?

Does it go up to 90 degrees?

- No.

Let's talk about the drive and the pump again,

since that was a problem last time.

- [Jesse] I think I might handle that myself,

doing the pump. - [Doran] Yeah.

- Considering we didn't make it last time.

- [Doran] Yeah. Take a look at it.

- 22s or something to get it the high up off the grounds.

- [Narrator] The failure of Grim Reaper number one

gave birth to the infamous legend

known as the Curse of the Hearse.

But Tombstone says it's time

to lay those superstitions to rest.

- People talked about the curse of the grim ripper.

- This is kind of bumming me out a little bit.

I ain't joking or trying to be on TV or none.

It's a little...

- There's like definitely a spirit floating around, man.

- [Doran] I don't believe there's a curse.

The moral of the story is don't be overconfident.

- We're just looking to put a dead guy on the ground.

Dig a hole, dump the casket in,

fill the hole back up. - Fill the hole.

- Just a simple hydraulic or something

with a pivoted piece of metal.

- [Narrator] Mike Desmond,

a veteran Monster Garage sketch artist,

has concerns about drawing up this mugshot.

- As much as we talked about it

and worked on it,

it seemed like there's still doubt,

that it might fail.

Can't help but think about

like how many people have been in and out of that thing.

Maybe it would be bad if it did succeed.

Jesse's not gonna want to hear me say that,

but...

- [Tombstone] How many holes you dug, Jesse?

- Me? - Yeah. With the backhoe?

- I think I'm digging a hole for myself right now.

[group laughs]

[glass crackles]

- [Narrator] To turn this Cadillac

into an abominable burial behemoth

will require first installing a new motor and tr*nny.

A coffin launcher will rest behind the driver's seat

and a backhoe and stabilizers must be crammed into the back.

A plow will attach to the front bumper

to keep the feted fiends underfoot.

[music]

[tires screech]

Day two, enter the league of extraordinary losers.

This infamous flock of failures

is not only the first team in Monster Garage history

to miss the five day deadline,

they are also the only team to get a second chance.

This is a team that will rally for redemption.

Tim Condor is a chopper and car customizer

working out of Northern California.

Jose Gonzalez is a heavy machinery mechanics

and hydraulics expert

from Long Beach, California.

Bart Grande makes everything from software

to haulin' a*s hardware in Carlsbad, California.

Tombstone and Doran Hirschkorn stay on for the build.

- Well, this is gonna be good.

I can, I can skip a lot of [glass crashing].

I think the best thing we have going for us

is all of us have like a built-in camaraderie.

You know, even though we didn't make it last time,

every one of us knows each other inside and out.

You know, I think right now,

from this moment on, we start fresh.

Forget the past is the past, and we just move forward.

What we're gonna do is to dig a hole,

put a casket in it and cover it back up.

'Cause the car's a total turd.

You know, it's solid body and interior wise,

but the motor, trans, brakes, everything's junk.

So I'm gonna, I got a cool little hot rod,

small block and a tr*nny.

So I'll do the motor swap and everything myself.

You know, I think that's it.

So, I even need to talk to you guys about distractions

or any of that stuff?

- No. - No.

- Do you remember when George Barris showed up last time

with the Batmobile and I was working?

- Yeah. - And didn't stop.

[metal clangs]

- Jesse, what are you doing here?

- Trying to weld.

Trying to weld, weld, weld, weld.

Okay.

- [Narrator] The first corpse this hearse disposes of

is Jesse's plan for a side launching casket ejector.

The Cadillac is not wide enough to accommodate a coffin.

The team decides to cross that bridge later

and begins to disembowel the body.

[Tombstone laughs maniacally]

[rock music plays]

[singer sings indistinctly]

While Tombstone spills coolant all over the garage,

Jose drains the gas tank and can't resist a taste,

but anything must be better than the taste of failure.

- Hey, it's kind of like moonshine.

Look out.

Anybody got a light?

- [Narrator] The broken down old engine

is free from the motor mount

and ready to be removed.

- There we go. - All right.

- [Narrator] But it's easier

to break out the old power plant

than it is to break old habits.

Tombstone is busted mingling in the lounge.

- Who's watching Tombstone?

Someone needs to watch him all the time.

- I-I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm working.

- I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm working.

I'm working.

- [Narrator] While ripping out the rear,

the team is reminded of the pungent aroma

of eau de corpse.

- There's that, that smell again.

Ugh. - Yuck.

- It tastes like grandma.

[builders groan laugh]

Dead grandma.

- And there's a lot more dead bodies in this one

than the last one.

- [Narrator] Before the build,

Doran did some heavy duty shopping.

The builder's buddies deliver a pre-owned Bobcat

and bucket to give their monster some bite.

[adding machine adds]

[monkey chatters]

The first diabolical distraction devised by the producers

is a dude with a k*ller mullet

and a young lady named Crystal.

- Hey girl. - This is Crystal.

- Hi, Crystal.

You wanna help us put this motor in?

[monkey blows raspberries]

Hey Jose, what happened to your tattoos?

- [Jose] You guys are real funny.

- How's your shovel head running? Is it still running good?

I like that paint.

[build team laughs]

- You see this.

- Up high,

down low, down low

too slow.

[builders laugh]

Give me a kiss.

Thank you.

- [Narrator] The monkey swings back to the jungle

and the gorilla builders get back to work.

- What's up, Butch?

- [Narrator] But if Tombstone

can't put his cell phone to rest,

Jose is going to go bananas.

- It's Butch Patrick, Eddie Munster.

What are you doing, Butch?

- Come on dude. Let's do something, man.

- Evil, evil. - Hey, I'm helping.

- Hold on a second, I'm helping Doran over here, dude.

Just, just, just, you know what I'm saying?

- [Mike] Italian redneck cheapo.

- Then they wonder why things don't get done.

- Then answer the phone, dude.

- [Jose] Don't show up the next day.

- And it's day one.

We got the [drilling] out of the car.

You're the one that [glass breaks] up last time.

So ease up.

I'm not one to down anybody else.

I'm a team player and I wanna let you know that I'm here

to make this thing succeed.

- See, all this guy brought was a bunch of prop crap

that we don't need here.

You know, bring a tool.

- Wow. - What'd you do, man?

Don't use so much of your brain to do that.

- Well, you know, I do work for George Barris.

I'm a fabricator. I do props.

- Really? I'll tell you what- - You the one that brought on-

- If you want, you want- - You are the one-

- [Tombstone] That wanted bring the animosity.

- You get any welder here

and we can see who can weld better then you and I.

- [Tombstone] Hey. Hey. You wanna bet money on that?

- [Jose] Sure.

- You wanna put a C note down on that?

- [Jose] I'll put my whole check on it.

- You wanna put a hundred dollars down

who could weld better?

- I'll put a thousand-

- [Tombstone] Right now, a hundred dollars.

- Thousand. - A thousand bucks?

- Sure. - You got a thousand bucks.

- I got a thousand bucks in my ATM card

and [ding] go pull right now.

- ATM. Anytime you wanna do it.

- I was certified by the state of California, bro

as a welder, okay? - I don't care who

you're certified by.

Well if you guys saw the first show last year,

that all explains everything.

- [Narrator] Heavy equipment tech, Jose Gonzalez,

thinks that the first time around

he and his teammates were buried alive

by the editing staff of Monster Garage.

- America didn't see the last episode from our eyes.

This is what happens when you piss off Jesse James.

- That's right. - Okay. Yeah, yeah.

You're on TV. Get back to work.

- This show, they can edit all they want

and all they're gonna get is work from me.

That's all I can say.

I'm pushing people,

but that's what it takes to get things done.

And I'm on a mission.

- [Narrator] The heavy duty backhoe was so well built

it's proving to be a challenge to rip apart.

- As you're cutting through this thing,

some of the metal always melts back together, so-

- [Narrator] So they try to pry it apart with a wedge.

- It says you gotta lock one in.

Even better.

[rock music]

- [Narrator] Dust falls on day two,

but the build team is haunted by the ghost of failures past.

[Tombstone laughing maniacally]

[engine grinding and not turning over]

A wise man once said, "Any day above ground is a good day."

With any luck, they'll put that theory to the test tomorrow.

Monster Garage factoid.

In 15th century England,

it was discovered that 4% of people assumed dead

were actually buried alive.

To stop the accidental burials,

one end of a string was tied to the corpse's wrist,

the other end to a bell on the surface,

giving the deceased one last chance

to become a dead ringer.

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

Day three, the builders return

to find their hearse waiting with open arms.

They waste no time jumping headfirst

into the belly of the beast.

- Alright, we got the rear end figured out

on how to make it a rigid, make it removable

so we can install the wheels.

Right now what we're trying to do

is get these brackets welded on the rear end

so we can build the other brackets that go from here

to the rear end and then we'll figure out

how much we can lower it.

We wanna get the car as low as possible with these 22s.

- [Narrator] They don't know who's supplying the rims yet,

but they do know

that their monster will be sporting

a brand new set of double deuces.

- We gotta figure out how to get the car jacked up enough

to where a 22

go up in here

and bolt it up.

- [Narrator] The only way to fit

the 22 inch wheels under the 44 Caddy fender skirts

is to drop the entire axle

so the solid mounted rear suspension

will bolt in place so it can be removed to mount the tires.

[clock ticks]

- The goal is by noon before lunch

to have the rear end

to where we can raise and lower it

and figure out where we want it to be.

So we gotta hustle.

[rock music]

- [Narrator] The team begins

on the solid mounted rear suspension.

First, Jose loses the leaf springs

and Tombstone turns cardboard templates

into plate steel axle brackets

to give their hearse a stiff ride.

- So what we're gonna do is we made these brackets.

They're gonna go here,

put a big bolt through it.

That way we've got rigid suspension,

but when the tires need to come on and off the car,

we can pull a big bolt out,

drop the whole rear end down,

put the wheels on,

jack it right back up,

put the bolt through it.

Off you go.

- [Narrator] Jesse's got a shortcut

for center punching bolt holes in their brackets.

- [Tim] Not used to thinking about these kind of tools.

- This just saved Tim an hour and a half off

of your two hour construction time.

Cool?

- How much-

- [Narrator] With the new Scotchman

punching and shearing machine,

Jesse makes Tim's brackets in about five minutes

while the team sheepishly looks on.

- Okay, you showed us up. [laughs]

Thanks.

- I don't think this is the best bunch of guys skill wise,

but I kind of like this bunch of guys the best

just personality wise.

'Cause they're kind of a bunch of wits and

it's good.

[rock music]

- These big triangle patterns

that I'm making right now

are just gonna be a great big bolt that goes through it.

And I have to make it strong enough

to handle six thousand pound Cadillac hearse

and 14 hundred pound claw.

- [Narrator] Tim Condor builds insane choppers,

like this bitter tribute to his previous experience

in the Monster Garage made out of a Mac tool set.

- You know, I mean, it is a true chopper.

You know, it'll k*ll you.

It'll flat put you on the ground.

You know, rub you into a greasy spot.

But chopper culture, thank God,

is never gonna get the respect that art culture gets

and it'll be pure forever.

And that's a beautiful thing, you know.

- [Narrator] As Tim refines the rear suspension brackets,

Jesse is brainstorming the coffin launcher.

- Flying casket.

It's gonna sit,

I'm gonna make this rack

like roll cage thing.

So the casket will basically sit in the back door

and we'll do like garage door springs

or something, kind of like the Mac tool truck.

And you just hit it into the hole

and then push the dirt over.

Onto the next corpse. [creepy laughter]

- [Narrator] As Jesse starts to make

a new support for the casket rack,

he takes a moment to eulogize

old fashioned funeral traditions.

- I don't want that fake suit

that's just on the front of the corpse.

Have you seen those?

Where you're like the corpse is naked on the back,

like assless pants

or just, you know, trying to save material.

I do want to like full clothes

and I don't want it like that blank face.

I wanna be like all...

Like that. That's how I want to go down.

- [Tim] Okay, Jose all right.

- [Narrator] To lighten the mood

and keep their team focused on their tasks,

the producers of the show arrange

for some motivational music.

- [Jose] Hang on.

[whistle blows]

[whistle blows in rhythmic manner]

[marching band plays]

What the hell?

What the hell?

- What's going on? [marching band continues]

- [Tim] Hey, where's the grinder?

Where's the grinder?

- And they wonder why we failed the first time.

[group applauds]

You can do it-

- [Narrator] As the band makes their exit

some serious progress is made

on the disassembly of the backhoe.

- Kick it on down.

Tomb's done.

Where's that marching band at?

We need 'em back.

- [Narrator] The stabilizers are detached.

The controls removed

and the backhoe is pulled off the frame.

Meanwhile, over at West Coast Choppers,

Jesse pulls a motor and transmission

from one of his own cars to use in the hearse.

- Should be good.

It's like a 13:1 327.

The Turbo 400.

[music plays]

- We have a motor. Jesse comes through.

[glass shatters]

Our goal is to have it in and running by tomorrow night.

The hearse will move. I guarantee the car will run.

Definitely.

- I have a feeling if anything goes wrong,

it's gonna be that motor, man,

and I'm not gonna, that's it.

That's all I gotta say about that one.

- [Narrator] The power plant for the hearse is starting

to come together, but this team is not.

- There is some days [distorted].

- I don't think that's gonna hold it.

- There's no way this thing's going anywhere.

- Yeah, I want it to work, man,

'cause I gotta connect all this.

- Dude, it's called trusting the team.

- I'm not saying anything.

- What are you doing here then?

Sounds like you're saying something.

- [Narrator] Last year the team goofed off too much.

This year, they're so busy casting stones about goofing off,

they hardly have time to work.

- 'Cause we idiots, man.

- You got the education of a glass of water

and you're telling me to think.

Ignorant son of a [tool clatters].

- Ignorant. - You're so ignorant.

- [Narrator] At the end of build day two,

once again nothing has been completed.

Is this team doomed to repeat history?

[crusher explodes]

Day four.

Nothing new under this sun.

The team is squabbling

from the moment they enter the garage.

- What's everybody's goal today?

- I'm not about wasting time, dude.

And I see a lot of time being wasted, man, we-

- [Jesse] Wasted time talking.

- The motor should have been in by now, plumb.

You know, maybe not all connected,

but it should have been in that.

- What I'm saying- - [speaks faintly] In by now.

- There's no way. - How?

- I'm gonna- - Listen, guys-

- I'm not gonna argue dude.

I'm not gonna argue man. - I'm going to work.

- [Tombstone] Everybody's just got to stick

with what they're doing.

- Look, you're right. - Put the motor in

and everyone's gonna find out whether you're right

or you're wrong. - Okay.

I'm, you're gonna piss me off man.

I'm gonna work.

[drill whirs]

- [Tombstone] Okay.

- It will run today.

It will run before I go home.

It will run before I go home.

- You got it out there, you gotta understand

that we're all working as a team here.

Well, we like to. - We are not.

- Oh, I know. - You might lose the illusion

that we're a team. - Let's create the facade.

- We're a totally dysfunctional team.

- [Narrator] Trying to make the dysfunctional functional

is high tech guru Bart Grande.

- This is not what I see as teamwork.

Teamwork to me is complete support.

There's no positive reinforcement here at all.

None.

Do not treat people the way we treat each other.

It's not healthy.

- [Narrator] Doran prepares the backhoe frame

for mounting in the rear of the hearse.

The rear axle is ready to roll

and just in time

because a brand new set of 22s roll into the garage

courtesy of the master fabricator.

- [Announcer] Freebie. - [Narrator] Zip.

- [Announcer] Zero. - [Narrator] Nada.

Bigger wheels call for bigger lug bolts.

They'll need to break down the axle hub.

But after 50 years of decay,

the brake drums are frozen stiff.

- This brake drum on this Cadillac's being ornery.

We gotta get it off

so we can put some longer wheel studs on it

so they don't break off.

- [Narrator] Tim wants to pull the hub off

with the forklift,

but it could destroy the rear end.

So subtler methods are employed first.

- We gotta get these longer wheel studs on here

to make it Jesse-proof.

Think it's gonna weigh about as much

as a small office building in downtown Long Beach.

Sometimes you'll spend a whole day working on

something you didn't even know was wrong.

It's just hot rodding man.

It's just the way it is.

- Pace yourself with it.

[chain clangs]

- Yanking with the chain, dude.

You can be there 'til fricking 10 years

and that thing will never come off that way.

- All right, all right, all right, all right, all right.

Let's tug it with a forklift. - Yeah.

- What do you think, Bart?

I've been heating it up.

- On cars that I struggle with this,

one massive sledgehammer hit right there.

Shocks 'em loose. - Really?

Okay, well let's try that.

- [Narrator] Tim tries Bart's method with excellent results.

- Barts 'em in.

- [Narrator] Finally the break drum and hub come apart.

So bigger lugs can be installed.

- Uh-oh. [tools bang]

- [Narrator] At last the rear end is ready

to be buttoned up.

The wheels are installed,

then the axle is bolted onto the new solid suspension.

[bar bangs]

- That's what I'm talking about.

- The tr*nny. - tr*nny is in.

We ready to slide. - Okay.

- [Narrator] Jesse and Bart cram the motor into place

without too much unexpected difficulty.

- Yeah, we're gonna have to make

a cross member for the tr*nny.

Air goes here, gas goes here,

water goes here.

That's it. The end.

- [Narrator] As if threatened by the progress

in the front of the hearse,

team rear installs the controls for the backhoe.

[music plays]

- You want the elbows out too

or you just want the levers out?

- Oh, let me see. - Elbows out if we can.

- [Tim] Try to move those levers around.

- No, either we bend this back

or we put that forward.

- [Tim] I'd rather go forward on this.

- Alright, we'll start cutting.

Is he cutting up or down?

- [Jose] Coming up.

- [Narrator] The hydraulic controls are hung

by the coffin with care.

Now it's time to mount the massive backhoe frame.

- Somebody push this inside.

How high is this supposed to sit?

Oh to that.

Okay.

There's your straight line right there.

That's on your line. See that?

Here. - Is it?

- Yeah, look. - Hot damn, I did that

that well - Dude, you're perfect man.

You're the damn engineer, dog.

- We're a practical application engineer.

- What does that mean? - That's the good kind.

- Oh.

- [Narrator] Apparently Doran measured twice and cut once

'cause it's a perfect fit.

So Jose welds it into place.

[thunder crashes]

As a reward for their hard work,

the producers treat the build team

to a field trip down memory lane.

[music plays]

As the team exits the car,

they realize that they're at the scene

of the last hearse's ultimate demise.

The dreaded crusher.

Suddenly a huge steel claw rises from the wreckage

and sinks its hardened talents into their ride.

[build team cheers]

- [Mike] Are you kidding me?

- [Narrator] Is the team experiencing deja vu

or a glimpse of the future?

- Later. - There he goes.

- This one won't die.

[expl*si*n]

- [Narrator] With the grim reminder of Grim Ripper One

ringing in their ears,

the bell tolls on day four and it's a goner.

They have two build days left to make their monster roar.

Will they walk out with tools?

- We don't reward for failure, failure, failure.

- [Narrator] Or walk out as fools.

Monster Garage factoid.

In 1960, Chevrolet broke new ground

with its innovative rear engine Corvair.

But because of the car's perceived poor handling,

it was dubbed "the coffin on wheels."

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

Day five.

With two days left to build,

there is still a chance

that this team will rise like a phoenix

from the ashes of defeat.

- I don't think there's any reason why

we couldn't finish this today.

Be honest with you.

- There's no way- - Trying to say

you're gonna get done early?

- No, no, there's no way why this shouldn't be done today.

- Finish plumbing will be tomorrow, but I think-

- But today it should be operating today. It should.

There's no reason why it shouldn't be operating today.

- I'm with you man. [grunts and roars]

- [Narrator] The first order of business

is to install the stabilizers,

which will plant the hearse in one spot

while the backhoe digs a six-foot hole.

Tombstone installs the starter

as Bart continues dialing in the motor.

And a fuel cell arrives to help them finish that task.

A major problem in the previous build

was the mounting of the hydraulic pumps.

[engine whining]

- Come on brother. - Hey, what happened?

- We seized one of the pumps. - Will it work this time?

- Yeah, 'cause I'm doing it.

[part clatters]

Don't drop that 'cause you know

that's gonna make the whole car work.

- Right there. [welder crackles]

- Is that cool? - Yeah.

- [Narrator] In addition to a Jesse-proof mounting bracket,

the new pump will run a thicker belt,

so the team won't burn this one up.

- The good part is, if it doesn't,

I think we'll have enough time to piss with it.

- [Jesse] Concentrate on the back.

I'll get this to work.

- All right.

- 'Cause we still got a [rumble] stuff to do back there.

- [Narrator] While Tim dials in the backhoe structure,

Doran bores out a beer keg

that will become the hydraulic fluids reservoir.

Halfway through the build,

the specter of doubt appears in the Monster Garage.

- I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit nervous.

You know,

I really don't want to fail twice in a row though,

even if it would prove a point

that some people were born without a work ethic.

I've had a lot of employees over the years

and like when I see someone and they're like, oh,

like this.

They see me look at 'em and they're like, "Oh, working."

- I'm in stick. Team still shuffling up there.

[squish] This is over.

- Hey, who am I? - Hey, you gotta get-

- [Tim] Here, man, get on the phone

pretending like you're talking.

- They fired Jesse, I'm the new star.

And I know George Barris

and Eddie Munster's gonna be down here at two.

Now could I borrow your car?

Because you know I don't have one.

- [Narrator] Speaking of George Barris, he stops by

to check out the progress on the hearse

while providing an unneeded distraction.

- Hey, and you guys are making wild progress.

What is this?

It's the resurrection of the great Grim Ripper.

You guys are hot to trot.

Jesse, come through again.

[evil laughter]

- 9/16s, bro.

Be very careful with those threads.

- [Narrator] Tombstone drops his phone

and picks up the thermostat housing.

Somehow he gets himself into hot water anyway.

- I might have stripped this thing out.

- But Tombstone, just striped

the manifold for the thermostat.

- Oh man. It just keeps getting better and better.

- Come Tombstone. Don't touch any more tools from now on.

[build team laughs]

[Jesse sighs]

- Remember when I said earlier that I really like these guys

and they're a great bunch of guys,

but that all went to, now.

I can't stand all of them.

[heavy metal plays]

- [Narrator] A new and vital piece

for their monster puzzle has arrived.

A custom made drive shaft from Driveline Inc.

- [Bart] It'll bring it closer, huh?

- [Narrator] The custom tailored drive shaft

is a perfect fit.

To avoid running behind,

they need to start running hydraulic hoses.

Instead, Bart and Jose start running their mouths.

- You got it? - I got it.

- [Jose] Alright, [squeaks] go [pop] yourself.

- Stay focused on what you're working on.

- Okay, so- - I forgot.

This is your project. - I was not talking about-

- This is all of our project,

not just yours, it's everybody's.

It's five people working on one thing-

- Go there and picking on

what you're doing. - All right?

- Just stick with what you're doing.

- [Jose] Cut it down.

- If I need it, I'll ask for it.

It's that simple. - Exactly like

the fricking pump didn't work last time, right?

Because you could do it in 15 minutes.

- [Bart] Idiot.

[distorted voice]

- [Narrator] They take a break from bickering

to start the install

of their 1400 pound monster grave digging backhoe.

- [Jose] Count of three push and I'm gonna smack it.

- Okay. 1, 2, 3. [hammer bangs]

- Nothing? - That's in.

- All right. Let me just get this cherry picker.

Put it on up.

- [Narrator] Jose attaches the hydraulic lines to the pump

- [Jose] And this is what failed us last time.

- [Narrator] They tap their keg

and top it off with hydraulic fluid.

It's just about party time.

The motor will run the pump

with the belt off a pulley

while spinning at 3000 RPMs.

The pump will draw hydraulic fluid

from the beer keg reservoir

and pump it into the actuators

on the backhoe arm.

But since the pump runs off the motor,

they can't test any hydraulics

until the motor is running.

- How far away and what else we need

to fire this thing up?

- Nothing. To fire just the motor.

- Let's light it and see what it sounds like.

- All right, hit it.

[engine turns over and doesn't start]

- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

- [Narrator] The hearse refuses to come to life

and it begins bleeding out

its 10-40 weight life's blood.

- [Mike] Where's that oil coming from here?

- That's for your oil pressure center.

- Okay, we got oil pressure.

[belch]

- [Narrator] Jesse removes the valve covers

to get a better look at what the motor's doing.

- Hit the ignition, see what happens.

[engine revs]

They're moving, it's got spark.

They wouldn't be moving if it had a broken timing chain.

Pop this piece open.

- [Narrator] To crosscheck the firing order

on their small block.

They bust open a brand new JEGS motor

and trace the plug wires from the distributor

to each cylinder.

- These are swapped.

- Switch it. See if it fires.

- [Bart] That was first.

This one should have been second.

- The second's done, dude.

- Wait, wait, wait. Slow down.

Where is this- - If you want-

- Wait, wait. Work with me a second.

This is the first one which is here.

Our next one should be right there.

- Which is where it's going. So...

- [Bart] All the way to there?

- That's it. - We're off on two.

Two were swapped. Okay.

- [Jose] Two and eight were backwards.

- Can't imagine- - But I mean-

- Couldn't imagine that not making it run.

- [Narrator] The problem could be as simple

as having their plug wires crossed.

Or it could be that their 327 small block

has given up the ghost.

- This motor man, this [drill whirls] yank it.

- [Narrator] The producers still owe this team one freebie.

So they decide to trade in their used motor

for a brand new power plant from JEGS.

- [Announcer] Freebie. Zero. Nada.

- [Narrator] For the first time in the build,

the team performs as a team

to perform a heart transplant on the hearse.

The finger pointing finally stops

because all hands are busy with the motor swap.

- Over there. - Ready?

- Yep.

- Hey, look at that.

We got electronic choke, man.

There it is.

- [Jesse] That's so we don't forget to fix that.

- Monster, Monster Garage.

- Try that one. - Oh.

- Okay. We're good.

We're good. Try to fire it up, dude.

[engine cranks]

- The floor.

- [Narrator] The new motor won't fire.

- No, it's getting plenty of fuel, dude.

- It sounds Ret*rded.

- Well, you know what? - What?

- I'd like to pull the number one plug out.

Put my thumb over it, crank it over to it pops off.

- And then put that- - And then put that-

- On number one. - Where it goes.

I'm down with that dude.

- Go ahead.

Boom. - There we go.

- Bingo. - 180 out.

- It was 180 out.

- Put your face by the pipe and see.

- [Narrator] Jose flops the distributor 180 degrees.

- [Jose] Fire it up, dude.

[motor revs and starts]

- [Narrator] The motor finally fires

and Jesse's confidence in his team is somewhat restored.

The beleaguered team leaves the garage

with a message to all mankind,

"Treat every day like it's your last."

Place your bets monster fans.

Will the builders begin

to breathe new life into their grim ripper

and resuscitate their reputations?

Or will the curse of the hearse send them home

with toe tags instead of tools?

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

- Put it on, you started it.

- [Narrator] The grim rippers treated day five

like it was their last,

but today really is their last.

It's time to get the monkey off their backs.

- It's good you guys are all getting along

first thing this morning.

[Tombstone laughs]

- [Narrator] Bart hooks up the radiator

while Jesse torches the springs

in the front suspension

to lower the front end of the hearse.

- [Jesse] All right.

[engine cranks]

- [Narrator] Now that the motor has a radiator and coolant,

they can run it long enough

to finally test the hydraulics.

As Doran manipulates the controls,

the huge backhoe awakes

and begins clawing at the air like a resurrected dinosaur.

The stabilizers rise and lower

and except for a little leakage,

the backhoe works perfectly.

Feeling that redemption is within reach,

the team attaches the bucket to the Bobcat arm.

Though the team has their first whiff of victory,

they are far from finished.

Now it's time to figure out how to dispose of the body.

- I was thinking that, that the casket's gonna run

inside the angle iron like this.

- It will. - No, they're already up.

- Hey, Doran. - Yeah. Yeah.

- What size is that then? [muttering]

- 28 inches inside.

- The plan is quite simple.

Using the original rollers from the bed of the hearse,

the team will build the casket track,

which will be powered by bungee cords

and released by a motocross starter gate.

[screams]

- Holy! [Jose laughs]

- Whoa, oh, because this is a mistake.

- [Jesse] I wouldn't count on that being right.

- Let's, you know what man? It's basic.

It's gonna be all right, man. It's gonna sh**t the casket.

- Get it.

[welder sparks]

- You got a whole pile of bungee cords down here.

- Are you scared? - Doesn't hurt to try.

You got the bungee cords in there.

Strap around the casket.

Push it back in.

Put the gate up.

Put the pin inside.

Come over here.

Jesse digs the hole.

Puts the bucket over to the side.

Pull the pin out.

How's that for you?

[bell gongs]

- [Narrator] A couple of coffins arrive in time

to execute the plan.

[Tombstone speaks Latin]

- Wait, wait, wait.

- Oh man. Look how it looks through the windows.

That's kind of creepy. I don't know.

That's creepy. - That's perfect, dude.

- [Narrator] Services will be concluded

by the actual burial of the dead,

but no one has put any thought

into how to build a plow on the front of the hearse.

- And all we need is a scrape

or just a scrape the dirt back in.

- Watch it. Watch it.

- [Narrator] With just six hours left to build,

Jesse sends Jose and Tombstone to the scrap yard

to dig up a suitable dozer blade.

Then he sets his sights

and his torch on a creepy custom exhaust.

But by the time he's finished,

the hood will need a little trim

to accommodate his creation.

- [Jesse] Got a Caddy in front. Yep.

- [Narrator] Bart is working on a pet project

that wasn't even part of the design.

- I am giving this thing cruise control.

You pull a little throttle lever,

pulls the throttle pedal in

sets right there and we can hold it like 3000 RPMs.

- NAR Bart's cruise control will allow Jesse

to leave the driver's seat and operate the backhoe himself.

- If not, it's a two person job.

This allows it to be one person job.

- [Narrator] At the scrap yard,

Jose and Tombstone have searched the mammoth mound of metal

and unearth the perfect pipe for their scraper blade.

[pipe clangs]

[welder pops]

Next, the team has to figure out how to mount it.

[music plays] [welder zaps]

[builders chatter indistinctly]

- We gotta job-

- [Narrator] With the body embalmed,

the brakes bled, and the gas tank filled,

it's time to bury this project once and for all.

[engine revs]

[music plays]

As the sun sets on the last build day,

the team finds that all the components

of the death dealing grave digger are alive and well.

- You see that exhaust?

[engine revs up]

[builders cheer]

- How's that feel?

[Mike laughs]

- [Narrator] The infamous Grim Ripper team

is finally redeemed.

- Bart? [coffin slides]

[Jesse laughs]

- Yes. - Woo!

See, you guys would've did what I said all along.

[builders groan and laugh]

[heavy metal plays]

- [Narrator] This time the crew

had a very different experience at the end of the week,

and they even get their tools like real builders.

- That's it. - Yeah.

- You did it. Dig in.

Mac Tools.

Oh, his leg burned off.

Ah.

- [Narrator] Mike Lavallee of k*ller Paint

in Suquamish, Washington

leaves the original oxidized finish of the hearse

for the base.

He then adds a grim reaper,

which extends his ghostly grip

all the way down to the backhoe.

[heavy metal plays]

[liquid bubbles]

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

[creepy rock plays]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[engine rumbles]

[music continues]

[engine rumbles]

[wolf howls]

[engine rumbles]

[creepy music]

[singer vocalizes]

[Tombstone laughs creepily]

[music plays]

[music continues]

[engine rumbles]

[heavy metal plays]

[Jesse laughs]

[engine rumbles]

[scream]

[heavy metal plays]

[theme music]

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster Garage

♪ Monster, Monster

[musical stings play]