02x06 - The Green Gerbil Isn’t So Green

[bunniefuu]

ALGERIAN PORT
APRIL 22, 1961

It's right here.

I'll never do that.

I'm sorry, Sidi Jacky.
Wait.

We're in a hurry.

Let's go!

Moktar!

What's that? What's that?

That's an atomic b*mb.

But, uh...

She's not green,
Gerboise Verte.

Gerboise isn't green,
but it's heavy.

It's a code, not a jerboa.

sh*t, how heavy it is!

Thank you, color...

Push.

Let's go.

Here it is!

Moktar, get everything you can from the hangar,
we're gonna need it.

Sure, of course.

The Holy Bible.

The Jerusalem Bible...

Moktar! Hurry up!

Aren't you sleepy?
It's late.

No, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay.

Thank you, Colonel.

I'll caress you until you sleep.

Let's face the
1,500 kilometers.

Why are we going there?

Sidi Jacky,
if we're going south, it's that way.

Wait, wait, wait, wait,
let's take a little detour.

I've got one more thing to settle.
before he left.

-Good morning!
-Good day.

I'll get this one right here.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome, good morning.

Thank you, for you too.

PARACHUTE COUP IN ALGERIA

Miss?

You dropped your wallet.

I'm a little distracted!
I'm sorry.

Why is that?

I don't know what I'm saying.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

Good morning, sir.

Wait, I'll give you something.

-No, please...
-No, I...

Would you like some wine?

I don't know if I should.

I don't know either.

This afternoon? Here?

Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Six o'clock?

Six o'clock.

I'll see you later.

I'll see you later.

Thank you. Thank you.

MORE THAN 100,000 PROTESTERS
IN THE STREETS OF PARIS

Squeeze hard, Benichou,
has a carbon.

That's dishonest, Jacquard.
Your property has exploded.

It wasn't water damage.

And it's honest to deny one
compensation for w*r damage?

And what proves to me that
is an atomic b*mb?

Sign it.

If not, the atomic test
will be done in your store.

When do I expect a refund?

For water damage it's fast.
Three weeks maximum, four weeks.

It's unfortunate to worry
more with the plumbing

than the size of France.

Oh, good.

Reggane is 1,000 miles from Algiers.

If we travel at 40 miles an hour..,
it'll take us 25 hours.

It's viable.

Depends on the car, Sidi Jacky.

What are you saying?

1,500 kilometers at 40 miles an hour,

is 1,550 kilometers
at 60 km/h,

i.e. a two
horses or a Ferrari.

That's all there is to it.

Now we have to do
on average 70 km/h.

Depends on the car.

Are we there?

No, Sidi Colonel.

They're sheep blocking the road.

Jacktar, you woke up my turtle
to see the sheep?

You've lost any
common sense.

I'm sorry, Colonel.

Both of you, Irene. Both of them.

You've been working in
textile for a while, Roger?

No, it's recent.

But I must confess I'm loving it.

I used to be a sales representative
of umbrellas.

It's less exciting
than the textile area.

You have no idea. There isn't a day

that a new fiber doesn't come in.

Resistant to creasing, not wrinkle,
doesn't fade.

Imported!

Sometimes, yeah.

What do you do, Irene?

I don't know yet.

I've been prevented for so long...
to do things,

that I feel like trying everything.

-Were you under arrest?
-No.

I'm kidding.

But, uh...

That was almost it.

May I?

-I love that song!
-Me too!

They'd love to separate us

to be happy

Wait for us

Forward!

sh*t!

Why did you go there?

This is the way!
And there's sand everywhere...

If we hear you, it's always the way,
if you look, it never is.

Let's go.

It can't be...

Would you mind helping us out?

I'm right here.

I don't feel well.
I die of heat, I sweat like a pig,

I turn tons of sand
to deliver a b*mb to I don't know who.

Cause I don't give a sh*t

for anyone who recovers this b*mb.
OAS, Gaullists, f*ck you.

So you're gonna come digging...
with your little friends.

-Sidi Jacky!
-Let's go!

Get out of the car, drop the turtle.
and grab a shovel.

-Now!
-Sidi Jacky!

Three days ago
that we unfold for you.

"I'm cold, I'm hungry, it's far away,
I'm asleep, you woke me up,

push, I don't see the dancer
from the womb." No more stuffing!

"Where's my turtle?
I'll get the slippers

and buy a dozen robes..."
And who pays for all this?

Me! I've had it. I've had it!

You treated me like sh*t, Jacktar.

I'm sorry, Colonel.

I can't wait to deliver this b*mb...
to the Gallic authorities.

You're right. I'm a piece of sh*t.

No, Colonel.

That's it, we can go.

Can you push?

You can push me,
Colonel?

Oh, please?

Now, Sidi Jacky,

...you have to average 50 miles an hour.

Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

What do you think?

I have a taste I don't know.

It's a monkey.

Monkey?

It's not a real monkey.

Monkey is the name we give in the Army...
to this canned meat.

The taste that you don't
you know, it's a pig.

Pig?

Sidi Jacky...

Are you married, Jacktar?

No, Colonel.

What about you, Moquard?

No more, Sidi Colonel.

I am.

Not my wife.
wants me more.

-The one with the big feet?
-No.

The one who doesn't like brown.

She said life is sad with me.

That she gets bored

Are you guys bored with me?

-No!
-Of course not.

She gets bored.

Sidi Colonel, Jesus said:

"Happy is the man who
perseveres in trial

for he shall receive the crown of life."

Where's that from?

I read in a Bible that I found
in the Gerboise hangar.

It's not bad. It's well written.

Oh, sh*t!

The car!

Oh, sh*t!

The marks, Sidi Jacky!
He went there.

Keep an eye on the phone.

We're not gonna make it.

How could he do that?
To leave us like this?

In the middle of the desert,
no water, nothing?

Son of a b*tch!

We're gonna die!

I'll never leave you, Jacky.

Me neither.

Are you sure that
is this the right way?

No more marks.

I'm not sure.

It's okay. It's okay.

I trust you, Moktar.

Thanks, Jacky.

We're saved!

Look!

Look!

Did you know that my colleagues
they wouldn't let me down.

Moulinier, Calot!
The class!

And Marie-Jo!

The class!

Look!

They even brought booze!

We're saved!
The class!

The class!

Jacky, it's a mirage.

Holy sh*t.

Come on, let's go, Jacky.

Forward.

Jacky, look!

It's another mirage.

No, Jacky.
Come on.

Come on, Jacky.

Come on.

Where did the animal go?

Over there.

Colonel, what are you doing?

I want to die! Do you understand?
I want to die.

Don't come any closer!

Sidi Colonel, don't do this.
The b*mb is dangerous.

Leave me alone, Moquard.

Let me die in peace.

Where's the f*cking button?

Not my wife.
hold me longer,

you can't stand me,
they all treat me like sh*t.

I want to leave everyone alone.

I'm gonna disappear.

You'll be reassured.

It's embarrassing
you're doing.

-Shameful!
-Moktar!

Want to blow up the b*mb for you

because your wife is upset?
Why doesn't she like brown?

The green Gerboise,

was made by General De Gaulle
to show the whole world

that France is great! And not for
to show the colonel is small!

Moktar!

Besides, he waited for us
to blow up the Gerboise.

And you disappeared with the car.

Sidi Jacky cried.

I didn't cry.

Jesus said:
"There is no greater love

than to give one's life
for your friends."

And you won't give

nothing to anyone if you do that.

That's enough, Colonel.

My turtle's dead.

I'm sure that
there are others in Reggane.

They'd love to separate us

to be happy

Wait for us

That's true

and confusing us

That love

Lovers

But with time

Less difficult nights

I can love you

It's written

Say something, Jacktar.

You don't have to exaggerate.

That's not nice.

Amen.

Amin.

Thank you, Moquard.

Of course, amen.

Now that the two horses are dead,
I don't know how we're gonna do it

to get this thing to Reggane.

Even if we were in a car,
I'd need at least 100 miles an hour.

At the very least.

I owe you an apology, Moise.

I made a mistake.

A mistake unworthy of
service that employs me.

Then it's to both of you that I must present...
my apologies.

I'm listening, Moulinier.

You put me in charge of a stakeout.

And I...

I, uh...

I underestimated the mission.

Or I overestimated myself.

I don't know.

Hey, come on.

This woman is dangerous.

Perhaps one of the most dangerous targets
I've ever dealt with.

-That point?
-É...

-It's a time b*mb.
-Really?

God knows when
she's gonna explode.

Are you sure?

For now,
all I know is there's something.

Activism, intelligence with
the enemy, leftism,

communism,

OAS...

Anything is possible.

We need to extend the surveillance.
We need to stay close.

I'm not supposed to walk away.

All right, then.

Go on, then.

Good work, Moulinier.

Wish me good luck!

Halt!

Stop immediately or we'll sh**t!

Get your camels and get out!

Colonel Mercaillon,

of the French Army.

Here are my friends,
Moquard and Jaktar.

We've come to deliver the atomic machine.

My respects, Colonel.

I'm sorry. We're tense
with this whole coup thing.

Blow, what blow?

-By the way, where are you at?
-Closed,

finished, they were stopped.

It's better this way.

No?

Yes.

To rest.

Merlaux?

No, Mullerovitch.

Do you want to get into the KGB?

I do.

and determination.

Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Skip the window.

Now.

Hello?

Hello?

We can't see anything,

we're gonna get close.

Sidi Colonel, isn't it dangerous?

Moquard, if it were dangerous,
we wouldn't blow up in there!

Let's take a closer look.

An atomic expl*si*n doesn't happen
every day, right, Jaktar?

That's right.

I'm dying of
warmth in that outfit.

Let's go.