06x15 - WOOHP-Ahoy!

[bunniefuu]

[music playing]

[beeping]

THEME SONG: Sam,
Clover, Alex, woo!

We love the fashion world.

We are "Totally Spies."

Genuine secret agents.

Because we never give into fear.

Sam, Clover, Alex, woo!

We win every day of the year.

S-P-I-E-S. We are
"Totally Spies."

Ever since losing my
beloved ship in battle,

I've been searching the highseas for her replacement.

Shiver me timbers!

The WOOHPtanic is theprettiest ship I've ever seen.

I can't wait to make her mine.

[laughter]

Clover had better
get here soon.

I've got journalism classin exactly 37 minutes.

CLOVER: Come on, girls!

Should we go healthy
salads lunch,

or all out veggie
burgers with the works!

Huh?

Please tell me you'restarring in some kind of play.

About a wayward pirate whogets a total fashion makeover?

If you're referring tomy cutting edge ensemble,

pirate chic is all therage on the spring runways.

SAM: Hm.

It's just a bit much.

Yeah!

Maybe you could
break it up a bit.

You know, wear the slouchyboots with a cute summer dress.

[honking]
- Arg, matey!

[video out]

--flop, you get
to walk the plank!

You wouldn't know
a hot fashion trend

if it was featured on the frontpage of a magazine, Mandy,

which it is!

Soon everyone on campus
will be wearing this.

Puh-lease.

All you need to complete
that ridiculous get up

is a well-trained parrot.

Oops!

I forgot.

That's what Sam
and Alex are for.

[laughs]

Ugh.

Nice one, Mandy.

Hm.

[shrieks]

Sheesh!

Could you at least throwdown a cushion or two, Jer?

Oh, my.

How apropos.

How did you know we'd be takingto the high seas, Clover?

That's it!

The next person who makes apirate joke gets the hook.

[laughter]

Nice surrounds.

So where are we off
to today, Jerry?

Why, the amazing
WOOHPtanic of course.

No way!

Oh, don't get
too excited, girls.

While this isn't
a mission per se,

it's definitely not
a pleasure cruise.

I'll be presenting a new lineof gadgets to my top agents.

Presentation?

Oh, yeah.

We're all over it, Jer.

But that still leaves
the rest of the day

for sunning and funning, right?

Well, yes, I suppose it does.

Clover may be prepared,
but how are Sammy

and I supposed to boardthe ultra posh WOOHPtanic

without luggage?

Already taken care of.
I packed for you.

Not only is that a majorviolation of our privacy, Jer,

but you packed winter clothes.

Oh, dear.

Uh, so I did.

[music playing]

[boat horn]

[laughs]

SALTY SCHOONER: The
time has finally

come for me to make my move.

Make my move!

[chatter]

I can't wait to
check out the spa.

Totes!

I could really use
a hot stone massage.

Talk about cute agents galore!

Who knew so many hot
guys worked for WOOHP?

Huh?

What?

I winked and he
totally ignored me!

SAM: Maybe he ignored youbecause he lacks x-ray vision.

How is he supposed
to see you winking

through that
ridiculous eye patch?

Uh.

Oh.

[giggles]
Oopsie.

My bad.

There's plenty of time
for fun later, girls.

Right now it's time for myhighly anticipated gadget

presentation.

[cheers]

Welcome to the
WOOHP gadget show,

the dawn of a new era ingadget creation with your host,

the incomparable Jerry!

[cheers]

[yawn]

This had better get
better fast, or I

may need another eye patch tohide the fact that I'm sound

asleep.

The CE 5000, or CamouflageYour Environment 5000,

can, at the press of a button,camouflage anything within

a half mile radius of the user.

It even comes completewith a menu of over 10,000

preprogrammed images.

[water splashing]

The EROS, or ElectromagneticRadiator for Overhearing Stuff.

While its name evokes love,please don't be fooled.

This powerful ray can
vaporize and warm up

anything a baddie unleasheson an unsuspecting world.

The Ooey Gooey Blaster Capspack quite a sticky punch.

Once deployed, they
immobilize a villain

in a substance


than molasses on a
cold winter's day.

Oh.

[splatter]

Oops.

Luckily, there's an
antidote back at WOOHP.

And finally the WATT, or WOOHPAmazing Temporary Tattoo.

When slapped on avillain's arm, the tattoo

becomes real and instantly
ties him or her up.

[cheers]

That was so good.

Well done.

Yeah!

Wowza!

Jerry totally outdid
himself this time.

Yeah!

I can't wait to try out thosebad boys on some baddies.

Jer.

You OK?

Actually, no.

I-- I'm feeling rather
woozy all of a sudden.

Why don't you go back toyour cabin and lie down?

Excellent idea, Clover.

I'll see you ladies laterat the tropical picnic luau.

Finally some down time!

If you need me,
I'll be at the spa.

Me too.

And I'll be the one--

[expl*si*n]

--in mortal
life-threatening danger

by incoming cannon ba*ls!

[shrieks]

[cannons flying and explosions]

ALEX: What's happening?

No idea!

But it looks like the
cannon ba*ls are armed

with some kind of sleeping gas!

[snoring]

Maybe this is another oneof Jer's harebrained tests!

Just like the last
time we were on board.

I seriously doubt it!

[explosions]

Pirates may be hot,
but that's just not!

[cannon blast]

SAM: We have to get out of here.

But first I better put
in a quick call to Jer.

Hello?

Jer, it's Sam!

And there's something
totally weird going on.

Sorry, girls.

But it looks like I'll have tocancel all further activities

for the day.

Oh.

My head is splitting!

Ooh.

Sheesh.

Rude much?

[cannon blast]

[gasp]

The name's Salty
Schooner, and this is

my trusty parrot, Calico Jack.

We'll be commandeering
this ship.

Commandeering this ship.

Commandeering this ship.

Uh, hello?

Ever heard of a barber?

Or modern clothes?

Who needs modern clotheswhen you come from a long line

of proud seafaring pirates?

With the help of my two
henchmen, Tuna and Bait,

I will bring honor back
to this noble profession

starting with the WOOHPtanic.

After spotting her with
my trusty spyglass,

I have decided to
make her my own!

Please.

Since when is stealing
a noble profession?

This boat belongs to WOOHP.

And while I personally admireyour bold fashion choices,

good luck trying to
take the WOOHPtanic.

Because you'll have to
get through us first.

Uh, uh, why, aren't
you the prettiest

pirate lassie I've ever seen.

With you as my pirate
queen, together

we'll rule the high seas!

[laughs]

[smack]

As if!

Sorry, but this is onepirate lassie who isn't going

anywhere, especially with you!

Yeah.

Clover's with us.

Not anymore!

Now she's all mine.

Oh!

Paws off!

Get down to the bridge andseize control of the ship,

then put these prisoners
in the engine room.

Huh?

Come on, Sammy.

We've got to help Clover.

We will, after we
nab Jerry's gadgets.

At least then we'll
stand a fighting chance.

SALTY SCHOONER: [grunt]

It's like finding treasureyou didn't know existed.

[music playing]

Now, remember.

Don't touch the ID tabletor you'll trigger--

JERRY [ON VIDEO]:
Welcome to the WOOHP

Gadget Show, the dawn of anew era in gadget creation--

Huh?

JERRY [ON VIDEO]: --the
incomparable Jerry.

Oh, Jer's presentation.

Shiver me timbers!

Time to teach these
landlubbers a lesson.

You do that.

In the meantime, I'm goingto bust a pirate lassie move.

Hurry, Alex.

Turn it off!

I'm trying.

I'm trying!

[water splashing]

Whoa!

JERRY [ON VIDEO]: The
Ooey Gooey Blaster

Caps pack quite a sticky punch.

Whoa!

[splash]

Girl's got to do what
a girl's got to do.

Well, well, well.

Trying to get your handson some weapons, girlies?

Doesn't matter.

We'll defeat you either way!

Yeah!

Besides, they aren't weapons.

They're super
advanced spy gadgets,

and you'll never figure
out how to use them!

That's where you've
miscalculated, lassie.

In fact, I've changed my mind.

Instead of merely
taking over the ship,

I'm going to use the EROSray to super-heat the sun!

The icecaps will melt
and flood the world,

turning it into thispirate's waterworld paradise.

I liked his old
plan much better!

[splat]

Look, boss.

I done good!

[laughter]

[snoring]

[laughter]

This is crazy!

We've got to get out of herebefore Salty floods the planet!

How, Sammy?

Not only are we
literally stuck here,

we're totally and
hopelessly gadget-less!

Not sure yet.

But we better think
of something quick!

Soon everyone will
know the legend of Salty

and his pretty
pirate lassie Clover.

Together, you and I will plunderthe world for new treasures

and rule the seven seas.

Rule the seven seas.

Rule the seven seas.

Double as if!

While my current predicamentmay scream otherwise,

I'm a totally 21st
century lassie.

Maybe this will help swayyou to the pirate lifestyle.

Huh?

So not what I meant.

Now if you'll excuseme, I have a fiendish ice

cap melting plot to enact.

Tuna!

Bite!

[music playing]

[laughs]

[blast]

[gasp]

What are you doing?

[water bubbling]

Don't you know that sweattotally ruins couture?

[laughs]

Ruins couture.

Ruins couture!

Yes!

Is it getting hot
in here, or what?

Phoo-ey.

Oh no!

The EROS ray!

Salty must be using it
to superheat the earth!

OK, if anyone has amultifunction charm bracelet,

lipstick laser, or anything
else we could use to get

out of here, raise your hand!

See, like this!

Alex, your arm!

Oh, I was just
demonstrating, Sammy.

You know I don't
have any gadgets.

[gasp]

My arm!

It's free!

Don't worry!

We'll be back to
free you guys later.

[footsteps]

JERRY: Oh.

Jerry!

Oh, please pass
the tea, Mother dear.

Oh.

Figgy scones.

My favorite.

[slurping]

Oh, I guess we're
officially on our own.

Way OK.

Well, get better, Jer.

Don't forget to hydrate!

Whoa!

Huh?

It's like being on the
set of a pirate movie.

Or on a cool theme park ride!

We need to stop the EROSray and rescue Clover.

Looks like the coast is clear.

Too bad the same can't
be said for the planet.

Oh no!

It's even worse than I thought.

The earth's cities are aboutto be flooded as we speak.

If only there was somethingwe could do from in here!

Maybe there is.

I might be able to steerthe ship away from the sun,

then the EROS ray wouldfire harmlessly into space.

Great thinking, Sammy!

TUNA: It would be.

If we didn't get here first!

[shriek]

Cool!

I mean, it would be
cool if we weren't

in such humongo trouble.

Hm.

Time to walk the plank!

Walk the plank.

Walk the plank.

Hey, watch it!

That's pointy.

SALTY SCHOONER: [laughs]

Uh oh.

You have to stop this, Salty!

Sam's only like the worstswimmer known to mankind

and Alex is way
afraid of heights!

Sorry, Clover.

No one double-crosses
Salty Schooner.

Get going!

Pst.

Alex.

Maybe this is one of those timesfor the hands free function

on our comp powders.

Comp powder.

Activate.

Link to WOOHPtanic mainframe.

Perfect.

Turn hard to port now.

[beeping]

Ah, that's better.

Even the ocean is cooling down.

You two are supposed tobe in control of this ship!

Ah.

Who's steering her off course?

No idea, boss.

Yes!

[gasp]

[whistle]

Hey, Tuna.

Can I borrow you a sec?

Me?

Of course you, cutie.

Come here!

I need to tell you
something important.

Gotcha!

It's been a real slice.

Hi-ya!

Stop her!

You're a sight for
sore eyes, Clover.

I get it.You really hate my clothes.

I'll change, OK?

But first let's show thisbossy boots we mean business!

[music playing]

Bait, you get the redhead.

Tuna, take out the brunette!

The pirate lassie's all mine.

[action music]

Sure baited you
into that one, huh?

[action music]

[parrot squawking]

Be quiet, stupid bird!

[laughs]

Huh?

[clank]

They sure don't makehenchmen like they used to.

[swords clashing]

You sure I can't convinceyou to set sail with me?

You just don't take no
for an answer, do you?

There is no "no" in pirate!

[swords clashing]

[slice]

It was all fun and gamesuntil you messed with the coif!

[action music]

[slice]

[action music]

[swords clashing]

Oh, you really
are stuck on me!

[laughs]

[shrieks]

And here I thought
you were a pirate!

This is the best you got?

I must have
forgotten to tell you.

I'm not left handed.

[laughs]

Wow.

You're really good at this.

I know.

[swords clashing]

SALTY SCHOONER: [laughs]

CLOVER: There's somethingI forgot to tell you.

I'm a super spy.

SALTY SCHOONER: You
haven't won yet, lassie!

[shout]

[splash]

Stee-rike!

Yeah!

[splash]

[splat]

There!

That ought to hold him untilwe reach port and Jerry

feels like his old self.

Great job, Clover!

Thanks.

Salty put up a good fight.

No, I mean with the bowling!

The Mali U bowling team couldreally use a ringer like you!

Are you kidding?

And ruin my mani?

[laughter]

Another job well done, spies.

What's going to
happen to Salty

and his not so merry henchmen?

Suffice it to
say they won't be

seeing water any timesoon from inside the WOOHP

containment facility.

I'm just sorry I
missed the excitement.

It sounded like a
swashbuckling good time.

Speaking of hot
messes, where's Clover?

CLOVER: Right behind you!

Let me guess.

Boat chic is all
the rage for spring?

Fashion moves at the
speed of light, Sammy.

Spring is so over!

Boat chic is all
the rage for fall.

Yeah!

Hm?

I know, right?

You can't stop staring
because we look amazing!

Pirate chic is hot, hot, hot.

You look fab, Mandy.

You too, Trent.

Hm?

Whatevs.

I don't get it, Clover.

How come you're not
upset that Mandy

and Trent stole your look?

Because I had no
idea how ridiculous

I looked until right now.

They can have pirate chic.

[giggling]

[theme music]