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06x07 - The Wedding Crasher

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Totally Spies!". Aired: 3 November 2001 – 3 October 2013.*
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The series focuses on the adventures of three teenage girls from Beverly Hills, California – Clover, Sam, and Alex – who live a double life as secret agents working for the World Organization of Human Protection (WOOHP).

06x07 - The Wedding Crasher

Post by bunniefuu »

[chime]

[music] Sam, Clover, Alex, woo.

We're a profession world.

We are totally spies.

Genuine secret agents.

Because we never give into fear.

Sam, Clover, Alex, woo.

Doing every day of the year.

S- P- I-E- S. We
are totally spies.

[music playing]

[engine starting]

[ominous music]

[saw blade sawing]

[suspenseful music]

Huh?

Oo, how about a fully
equipped luxury yurt?

Or a digital soccer ball.

Or their own
signature perfume?

Oh, or a double
decker designer dog bag.

Those would all be
great suggestions girls.

If only my parents weren'tthe hardest people to shop

for on the entire planet.

When I say they already haveone of everything, I mean it.

And their 20th
anniversary is tomorrow.

What am I going to do?

Don't worry Sammy.

We'll help you
think of something.

Woo.

How about this personal
mani-pedi robot?

I mean, hello, if this doesn'tscream totally unique gift,

I don't know what does.

I agree, Clover,
which is exactly why

I bought it for them last year.

[traffic noise]

Whoa.

What's with the noise fest?

[tires squealing]

CLOVER: Check it
out, a stretch limo.

Do you think it's a celebin the midst of some kind

of shopping emergency?

Huh, oh, something
tells me it's

even more important than that.

Sam's right.

It's not a celeb 9-1-1.

It's a WHOOP 9-1-1.

Ah.

[tires squealing]

- Jerry, are you in here?- Hello Spies.

So lovely to see you again.

Wish I could
say the same, Jer.

But you totally interrupted ourquest to find the perfect gift

for my parent's anniversary.

Sorry to hear that.

But I assure you that I am hereon very important business,

namely to inform you thatseveral high-profile weddings

around the globe have beenattacked by unseen forces.

What do you mean, attacked?

JERRY: See for yourself.

This footage is from
a wedding that took

place in Italy just yesterday.

[bells chiming]

CLOVER: Oh.

No way.

This is footage from theKim Starsmashian wedding.

Kim Starshmashian?

Who's that?

Duh, only like the
most famous socialite

in the whole wide world.

And the prettiest, whichisn't surprising considering she

cleans her face
with diamond dust.

Speaking of diamonds, checkout that rock on her finger.

It was discovered on the moon.

Which, FYI, is where she metthat astronaut hottie of hers.

Can you say groomtastic?

[crowd screaming]

Whoa, that was
seriously scary.

Todes.

From what I could see,
that dream wedding

looked more like a nightmare.

Indeed.

And WHOOP has no
indication of what may

have caused the disturbance.

So far, it's a complete mystery.

I'll tell you what
else is a mystery.

Why Kim Starsmashian would wearsuch a strange wedding dress.

I mean, I know fashion.

And I've never seen
anything like it before.

It's way avante garde.

Interesting
observation, Clover.

According to Global
Shipping records,

the dress came from a
nondescript warehouse in

the garment district in Paris.

And what the dresses wornby the other brides, Jer?

JERRY: They came from
the warehouse as well.

It appears we have
our first clue, Spies.

You're to go to France andcheck it out right away.

Ah, oo, well what
are you waiting for?

WHOOP us already.

I can't send you just yet.

After all, I haven't
given you your gadgets.

Whoa.
Yeah.

Whoa.

JERRY: Today we have apair of drill heel boots,

and infrared x-ray contact
lens, power tweezer

squeezes, and fresh on thegadget scene, an escape

from trouble bubble wand.

Thanks, Jerry.

You're quite welcome.

I've also arranged
for the WHOOP-a-twa

to be available for you onceyou've reach your destination.

The WHOOP-a what?

You'll see.

Now goodbye girls,
and good luck.

Yeah.

[technical beeps]

[accordion music]

Maybe you should do somethingromantic for your parents 20th,

Sam like having their facesappear on the Eiffel Tower

during the laser light show.

Or you could get
someone to paint

their picture
impressionist style

and hanging in the Louvre.

Thanks girls.

But I got them
that two years ago.

Huh.

[phone rings]

Ah, sorry, Sammy, but theshopathon will have to wait.

Looks like we're almost
at the warehouse.

[dogs barking]

Ah.

CLOVER: Good.

Let's get to the mission
and off the WHOOP-a-twa

before my motion
sickness gets any worse.

[technical swoosh]

[suspenseful music]

This is it, the place
where all the bride's

dresses were shipped from.

CLOVER: Sheesh, so much forputting out the welcome mat.

SAM: Good thing we're spies,as in, we can let ourselves in.

And the drill
heel boots are just

the thing to make that happen.

[LOUD DRILLING NOISES AND SCREAMS]

Nice work, Alex.

CLOVER: Is it me or is
this place not exactly

rocking a fashion design vibe?

You're right, Clover.

It's rocking more of
a dusty smelly vibe.

I don't get it.

There has to be
something we're missing.

CLOVER: Well, if there is, theinfrared x-ray contact lens

will lead us to it.

Whoa.

No way.

What is it, Clover?

A hidden room
behind that wall.

Any chance there's ahidden button to go with it?

[tinkling music]

Isn't there always?

Bad guy lairs are,
like, so predictable.

[music playing]

[electronic door moving]

Oops.
Scratch that.

That was, like,
totally unexpected.

[ominous music]

[boink]

[ominous music]

Huh?

Ah.

OK, dusty and smelly justturned into freaky and weirdy.

Tell me about it.

I mean, since when arewedding gowns this high tech?

No wonder Kim Starsmashian's
dress looked so

strange in the footage we saw.

Girls, check it out.

It's a list of all the weddingdresses and who ordered them.

Oh, that's awesome, Sammy.

Um, why is it awesome exactly?

Because if we can figure outwhere the next dress is going,

we can get one step
ahead of our villain,

wrap this mission up, and getback to anniversary shopping.

Ha ha.

Oh no.

It says here that the
last dress was shipped

to the royal palace in England.

The Royal wedding?

We've got to tell
Jerry right away.

[loud buzzer alarm]

Uh-oh, sounds like
we tripped the alarm.

We better get out of here.

[sewing machine running]

Uh, girls, do you recognizethat sound from Professor

Plunkett's class?

Yeah, it sounds just like--

A sewing machine.

Look out.

Oh.

[needles hitting the wall]

This is one wacky
security system.

Agh.

[music playing]

Ah, unless we want
to be sewn together,

we better pick up the pace.

Don't worry ladies.

I know just what to do to putthis rude machine in its place.

Agh.

[technical wire swirling]

[music playing]

Ah.

Hey.

Woo h*.

Way to go, Sam.

But hopefully your cowgirlmoves work on fabric steamers

as well.

[steam blast]

This is nuts.

The whole place istotally rigged to attack.

Ah.

[suspenseful music]

Oh, what's that?

That is the express
train outta here.

Come on.

Whoa.

[music playing]

Woo hoo.

[music playing]

Ah, ow.

[music playing]

Whew, talk about
temperamental equipment.

At least it's
not a total bust.

All of the wrinkles got
steamed out of my uni.

[phone rings]

Ladies, how is
the mission going?

Terrible.

We just got attacked by themeanest sewing machine ever.

Bummer.

On the bright
side, we think we

know where our baddie
is going to strike next,

the royal palace in England.

Oh dear.

The royal wedding is aboutto take place there tomorrow.

You girls are to goundercover and keep an eye

on this high-profile event.

Yeah.

Jerry, you're a genius.

I mean, what better
place to meet

a prince than a royal wedding.

And find a weddingcrashing baddie, of course.

Very good.

I'll add your names
to the guest list.

Be vigilant as England is verynear and dear to my heart.

Cheerio, ladies.

Oh, we're going to England.

And we're on the guest list.

British anniversary
gifts, here we come.

OK, girls, huddle up.

We need to put together
fabtastic outfits

that'll knock them down
at this royal wedding.

Trust me, girls.

They'll never know
what hit them.

Ha ha ha.

[beeping]

[music playing]

[camera shutters clicking]

This is so awesome.

I mean, look at
all the cute boys.

I wonder which ones are royalty.

Shouldn't they be wearingcrowns or something?

Hm.

Do you think maybe the
bride and groom would

give me one of their gifts?

Because people are alwaysgetting two of something

as a wedding present, right?

I don't know, Sam.

But right now, we
need to keep our eyes

peeled for our villain.

We should spread out.

CLOVER: Hm, I agree.

I'll head this way.

We can keep in
touch via ear com.

[beep]

[camera shutters clicking]

Hello there.

Are you with the
brides or the grooms?

Oh, I'm with the
[mumbling] party.

So nice to meet you.

Ah, hm.

[music playing]

Oh, that cake looks
so scrumpstiousy.

Oh, no one will mind if Ijust take a little taste.

[music playing]

Yummy.

Oh.

Hm.

Mm.

Oopsie.

[music playing]

A waiter, ugh.

I'm looking for a
Prince Charming, not

a blue plate special.

Guys, I'm not seeinganything strange over here.

Me neither.

Mm, yeah, me neither.

[crowd cheering]

[royal music]

Oh, it's the
bride, which means

the prince can't be far behind.

[crowd cheering]

There it is, the crazy gown wesaw designs for the warehouse.

Clover's right.

Mm.

[boing]

I'm going to get a closerlook with the infrared

x-ray contact lens.

SAM: We're moving in
to give you support.

[beeps]

The things I do for WHOOP.

[royal music]

O-M-G. This dress
is majorly decked out

with hidden hostile intentions.

Hey.

Who's getting all gropey.

Watch the threads.

All right you three, Idon't know what you're up to,

but you're outta here.

Oh.

I'm on the guest list.

And going to the royal weddingis a once in a lifetime

opportunity.

I can't miss it.

That's where your
wrong, princess.

You're so gonna miss it.

[door slams]

Look, you've got
to listen to us.

We think that the bridemay be in a lot of danger.

You have to let us out
of here immediately.

Hm.

[engine starts]

For being so soft andcuddly, you sure are crabby.

Oh.

Oh.

No way, it can't be.

Wh-- what are you
talking about, Clover?

Haven't you been
paying attention

to fashion design class, Sam?

That's Wera Van, the mostfamous wedding dress designer

ever.

So, what are you doingdressed as a guard Ms. Van?

Is military sheik making
a comeback or something?

Not exactly.

Let's just say I'm here
to cause some chaos.

Wait a sec.

Are you the one whoweaponized the bride's gown?

I sure am.

But why would you
do such an evil thing?

Because I'm tired of no onetruly appreciating my work.

Once these brides
wear my creations,

they shove them into a closetnever to be worn again.

So I decided to make
the center of attention.

Gowns that no one
will ever forget.

Ha ha ha ha.

OK, so I get the crazybitter villain lady part.

But do the dresses have
to look so over the top?

Sometimes, less is more,
if you know what I mean?

You try loading electronicweaponry into a wedding gown

and have it look good.

Right It's not easy.

Wera, just let us out of here.

There's still time
to stop this madness.

Ah, ha, ha, ha, oh, the
madness has just begun.

Huh?

So long girls.

I've got a wedding to crash.

Agh.

Wait.

[suspenseful music]

[boing]

[ominous music]

Oh no.

Uh-oh.

Agh.

[splash]

Ah, ugh.

This thing is locked tighterthan Clover's fifth grade

diary.

Well, we better come
up with something fast.

Because the chips are down.

And we're about to beswimming with the fishes.

Not to mention the fact thatif I don't make it out of here,

I'll miss my parent's
anniversary completely.

[suspenseful music]

[upbeat music]

[electrical charge]

[suspenseful music]

Ah, ah, oh, ah.

Those tweezers are sweet.

Imagine what they can do withstubborn stray eyebrow hairs.

Come on.

We gotta hurry back
to the wedding.

Huh.

[music playing]

Dearly beloved, we are
gathered here today to--

Experience the wonderthat is my latest creation.

ha, ha, ha, ha.

Oh.

[beep]

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

[crowd oh's]

I wanted my wedding
dress to be special.

But I wasn't expecting this.

Ah.

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

[crowd cries out]

Don't worry. it's just aminor technical difficulty.

Everything is fine.

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

[people screaming]

WERA: Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Agh.

[crashing sounds]

No.

Get away.

Agh.

[people screaming]

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

[ROCKETS LAUNCHING AND BLOWING UP]

Let me outta here.

Looks like Wera alreadygot her little party started.

Totally.

This royal wedding
is a royal disaster.

Charlie, help me.

Yes, darling.

I'll get help right away.

Ah.

Whoa, that prince
is a total wimp.

Cross royalty off my
dream boy wish list.

WERA: So, those annoying
girls managed to escape.

Well there's no
escaping my dress.

[suspenseful music]

This is my bestdismantling of a wedding yet.

Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Agh.

Agh.

Uh-oh.

Angry gown headed our way.

Then it's time tobubble up with the escape

from trouble bubble want.

[intense music]

No.

Oh, awesome.

So, you want to play games?

Fine.

I can play, too.

How about a little kick ball?

Agh.

[intense music and screaming]

Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Agh.

Whoa.

[intense music]

Whoa.

Ah, so much for
escaping from trouble.

Oh, tell me about it.

That was more nauseating thanriding on the WHOOP-a-twa.

Ah, come on, girls.

If we want to save thatbride, we gotta but a move.

Time to put that dress
out of commission.

Agh.

SAM: With a little
help from this cake.

[BRIDE SCREAMING AND INTENSE MUSIC]

Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Um, um, um.

[BRIDE SCREAMING AND INTENSE MUSIC]

Ah.

Oh, I'll be getting
a refund on that dress.

Yes.

Yeah.

Way to bounce that dressinto the bargain bin.

Oh.

[ominous music]

This isn't over yet.

[boing]

Agh, sorry girls, but noone crashes my wedding crash.

Ah.

Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Your skills are no matchfor my cutting edge fashion.

[intense music]

Whatever lady.

I haven't met an accessorythat's gotten the better of me

yet.

And I haven't met a villainthat's gotten the better of me.

Yeah.

What they said.

Don't worry, all
that's about to change.

[intense music]

Whoa.

Ah.

No.

Yah.

Hey, paws off.

[intense music]

No, ah, oh.

Yes.

Ha, ha, ha, ha.

I think it's time we
turned this crazy dress

on its crazy designer, Alex.

With pleasure, Sammy.

Hah.

Oh.

Agh.

Ugh.

[intense music]

Agh.

Gotcha.

Sheesh, I think
that thing just

squeezed me down to a size 2.

Excellent work spies.

My agents will take
it from here and take

Wera Van to the WHOOP
containment facility

where she clearly belongs.

Thanks Jerry.

[chopper blades whirring]

And as much as
I'd love to stay

and chat about your successin defeating fashion evil--

[FINGERS SNAPPING AND HORSE NEIGHING]

I need to gather up the weddingparty ASAP so the ceremony can

be finished.

After all, England
is counting on me.

And I can't let Her down.

[horse neighing]

[music playing]

[technical boing]

Whoa.

Now there's something
you don't see every day.

Good Good thing.

Seeing Jerry in action likethat is way too freaky.

[music playing]

Yes.

Quick, I need a box so I canget this delivered to my parents

before their 20th
anniversary is over.

[chime]

Oh, I think today is
yesterday now, Sammy.

Their anniversary is donezo.

I can't believe it.

Where did the time go?

CLOVER: The same place
it always goes and us

hopping from
continent to continent

chasing around twisted baddies.

Agh.

Oh, this is a
lame gift anyway.

So much for finding
them something unique.

[phone rings]

Hello?

Sam darling.

It's mummy and daddy.

Oh, hi mom.

Hi dad.

Happy anniversary.

Listen I'm sorry that I--

Honey, we just wanted to thankyou for the amazing anniversary

gift.

Hm?

An amphibious
bicycle tour of London.

Oh.

We have never had
such a unique present.

Uh, did you say
bicycle tour of London?

You are so good to us, baby.

We're about to wrap things up.

But thank you again.

And we'll see you soon.

[kissing sound]

Crazy.

I wonder who got them that gift.

[beeping]

Consider this my thank youfor a mission well done.

Jerry.

Sweet.

Sounds like Jerry really camethrough for you this time.

I'll say.

But there is no way I'm goingto blow it again next year,

which is why I'm going
to start thinking

about a 21st anniversary
gift right now.

[music playing]

[boing]

[theme music]

[chime]