04x11 - Mime Your Own Business

[bunniefuu]

[chattering]

[laughing]

Boy, I really cracked
them up tonight.

Ha ha.

So my adoring public
wants an autograph.

Well, it'll cost you.

[playing accordion]

[shouting]

[cackling]

Wow.

I found your lecture on cold
fusion to be so interesting,

Mr. Roberts.

May I clean those
test tubes for you?

Thank you, Sam.

It's wonderful to see a student
so interested in chemistry.

Oh, hi, Sam.

I guess you were serious
when you said you'd

hit up Mr. R for extra credit.

Is it working?

[laughing nervously]

Oh, what a total coincidence.

That's my favorite movie too.

I love the part when--

Clover.

Is this the guy you said you
were majorly crushing on?

Oh, he's just as cute
as you say he was.

[nervous sounds]

You know, she really,
really likes you.

OK.

I'll leave you two
love birds alone.

Way to totally blow it, Alex.

You are the absolute
worst at keeping a secret.

What are you
guys talking about?

I'm an expert at
keeping secrets.

Hello.

Remember that time we had to
cancel a party because you

told the neighbors about it?

Or the time you told my
English teacher I downloaded

my essay from the internet?

None of those
were my fault. I can

totally keep things to myself.

I didn't tell Sam that you
lost her favorite CD, did I?

Oops.

Wait.

You lost my CD?

I--I didn't really lose it.

I just kind of lent
it to this guy and--

[growling]

[laughing nervously]

Oh, where did they come from.

Oh, look it at
the little babies.

[shouting]

Welcome, super spies.

How did you like the babies
from the WOOHP daycare?

They were cute,
but not so cuddly.

Hey, new tie, Jer?

I love it.

You always know
exactly what to wear.

Well, I once was runner
up in the Most Dapper

Man in Manchester Contest.

But Sam, didn't you say
that Jerry's taste in clothes

was hideous?

[growling]

So Jer, what's up?

Yes.

Well, people in the
entertainment district

are being attacked by
a mysterious entity.

Strangely, the
attacks have only been

on performers like singers,
comedians, and magicians.

Whoa, tough crowd.

I want you girls to go
there and investigate.

Gladys will supply
you with some gadgets

to help you on your mission.

GLADYS: I'm giving you
personal fingernail darts,

low gravity go-go boots,
net-throwing mascara,

and the lipstick
microphone camera,

and a new item, red
heat throat lozenges.

How do they work?

I'm glad you asked.

Time for a little demonstration.

Off to the Dojo.

[gong]

The red heat throat lozenge.

As soon as the lozenge
comes into contact

with your salivary
glands, it releases--

[gasping]
Oh, dear.

Not now.

It releases-- [gasping].

[whoosh]

Uh, thanks for the demo, Jer.

I think we get the idea.

The red heat lozenges are
good for melting objects

and for clearing one's sinuses.

OK, Alex.

We've got some
really juicy gossip,

but you can't tell anyone.
- Don't worry.

It's safe with me.
Just tell me.

Tell me.

OK.

[choking]

Really?

Gladys?

I don't believe it.

Remember.

You can't tell anyone.

You have to keep it a
secret to regain our trust.

Don't worry.

It's in the vault.

Most of the performers are
being attacked in this area.

The latest incident
occurred at this club

to a magician named
The Amazing Molotov.

- [crying]
- Excuse me.

Are you The Amazing Molotov?

[gasping]

What's with the outfit?

You want a crowd laughing
with you, not at you.

She's lost her voice.

So you petted a
goat that bi you.

You bet a giant bag
of candy to a baby.

No, no.

I've got it.

You opened a box, and a
cat jumped at your face.

I've got it.

We'll just get her to
write down what happened.

What does it say?

I'm not sure.

Her handwriting isn't that good.

Besides, it's in Russian.

Oh, this isn't
getting us anywhere.

[phone ringing]

Hm?

It's Jerry.

Girls, there's been reports
of a suspicious figure

prowling around the concert
hall down the street.

Jer, what do you know
about gla-- glasses.

You know, glasses?

Like sunglasses.

Oh, never mind.

[cheering]

Sounds like we've
crashed a concert.

We're going to need a better
view to find our suspect.

[music playing]

Yeah!

Woohoo!

This is perfect.

A, ha, ha.

I'll say.

I can't believe I'm
at a Valet concert.

Isn't he dreamy?

These will look
great in my locker.

Uh, we're supposed to
be looking for a suspect,

not starting a fan club.

Wait, I think I see him.

Clover, cut the swooning
and start zooming.

CLOVER: He's either our
guy or just geek waiting

to get his accordion signed.

[playing accordion]

[screaming]

[muttering]

CLOVER: Valet has lost
his beautiful voice.

And worse, he
looks like a clown.

Come on.

Our suspect is getting away.

After him.

I thought accordions
were bad enough,

but now they steal
people's voices too?

[zapping]

Hurry.

[gasping]

[shouting]

[crashing]

[laughing]

Let's get him.

Hey.

What's up?

Excuse us.
Sorry about that.

It's fine.
Really.

No, excuse me.

OK, buddy.

Your recital is over.

Hey, your aim is
as bad your music

[zooming]

[shouting]

[panting]

[gasping]

[coughing]

[squealing]

Whoa.

Fashion disaster of
the century much?

White paint.

It must come from Mr. Accordion.

I'll send it to
WOOHP for analysis.

Oh, don't worry.

You guys look great.

In fact, it'll probably
start a new trend at school.

Everyone's going to be
doing it in no time.

Well, girls.

I've got something
that will help you--

[gasping]

Oh, my goodness.

What happened to you?

[clearing throat]

Whatever happened, it's great.

What a unique, um, look,
and such stylish uniforms.

A trend just waiting to happen.

[giggling]

Well, sorry, Sam.

I'm all out of crackers.

But here.

Try these devices.

They'll help you communicate.

Just type into it, and it'll
translate your text into words.

COMPUTER: Testing
one, two, three.

Alex says she hates the way
the computer voice sounds.

She rather use puppets
to get her points across.

[shouting] What on
Earth are you doing?

Rather low tech, but I
suppose that could work too.

COMPUTER: At least now,
she'll have a hard time

telling people's secrets.

GLADYS: I analyzed
the white pages again.

It contains traces of
DNA from a mime who

goes by the name of Jazz Hands.

So this Jazz Hands must be
the one behind the attacks.

But why is he stealing
people's voices?

COMPUTER: Let's find
him and ask him.

Jazz Hand's last known
address is around here.

I think we should use
our hologram projection

mood rings to help us fit in.

Well, at least we aren't clowns.

COMPUTER: Speak for yourself.

Oh, but it works
for you, Sammy.

COMPUTER: Yeah, like, whatever.

I have a feeling that Jazz
Hands has been here recently.

COMPUTER: Where's Alex?

[squeaking]

OK.

The socks were bad enough.

This is ridiculous.

Well, oh well.

What do we have here?

What's with those
super weak costumes?

See, Stewart?

I told you they were
clueless losers.

[scoffing] What are
you two doing together?

Oh, I owe it all to Alex.

If she didn't blab
about your secret crush,

I never would have
stolen him away from you.

[squeaking]

What are you doing?

Stop it, Alex.

You're like, totally
freaking us out.

COMPUTER: We mean you no harm.

I always thought you
guys were like, freaks,

but this takes the cake.

Sorry, Clover.

I could never hang
out with somebody

with such weird friends.

Thanks, Alex.

[squeaking]

No, you can't have gravel
flavored ice cream.

We're here to find
Jazz Hand's home.

COMPUTER: Guys, over here.

That's got to be the place.

[playing accordion]

COMPUTER: That
must be Jazz Hands.

CLOVER: He's showing footage
of himself performing.

What an ego.

COMPUTER: He's not very good.

No wonder.

An accordion playing mime.

Like, get a clue.

And it looks like he's
got raging jealousy

issues with other performers.

[gasping]

What?

What's going on?

You know a ballerina that
has salt in her eyes?

You've always dreamed of
being a window washer?

You want to buy a
lamp at a free market.

Uh.

[gasping] Jazz Hands.

Too bad you couldn't just
mime your own business.

Hey.

I thought mimes weren't
supposed to talk.

Oh, that's just a
misconception perpetuated

by the mime-hating media.

In fact, we are all
allowed to talk offstage.

Why would I have a
telephone if I didn't talk?

That would be ridiculous, as
well as a total waste of money.

COMPUTER: Can we
get on with this?

You can' talk to me like that.

I am the world's greatest mime.

[whooshing]

I have a diploma from the
International Mime Academy.

You may not understand the
intricate craft of mime,

but you will respect me.

[whooshing]

COMPUTER: This mime
means business.

[laughing]

[gasping]

Huh?

[grunting]

So I suppose you don't want
to talk things through, huh?

No one shall defeat
the power of the mime.

Ya!

[whooshing]

[grunting]

OK.

This is totally not cool.

Being a mime isn't
about being cool.

It's about the art
of body movement,

subtle gestures,
nonverbal communication.

Something you'll
come to understand.

That was just the opening act.

It's time for the star of
the show, the ultimate mime

weapon, the invisible box.

OK.

Anyone else feeling a
little claustrophobic?

Ah, there's no
point in struggling.

You can't get out.

Ingenious in its simplicity,
the invisible box

is harder than it looks.

COMPUTER: Why are
you doing this?

I've been shunned
by the arts community

because they don't
understand my genius.

So I'm going to turn the entire
world into a silent world.

Ah!

Then everyone will realize
how difficult mimehood is.

Not just anyone can be a mime.

It's a craft.

A craft, I tell you.

[cackling maniacally]

I'm not sure how
it was possible,

but now I hate mimes even more.

COMPUTER: I'm suffocating.

We've gotta get out of here
before we run out of air.

COMPUTER: I think
I know a way out.

Help me rock this
box back and forth.

[shouting]

[shattering glass]

Now we've got to stop Jazz
Hands, or everyone in the world

will be wearing those
same hideous outfits.

Sorry.

If I were a mime,
where would I go?

Ew.

Like I'd ever be a mime.

[whooshing]

[helicopter]

You all laughed at me.

Well, now, I am laughing at you.

Hear this.

[cackling]

[whooshing]

Time for our jet
pack backpacks.

[whooshing]

Come on, Sam.

Get that white-face loser.

Oh, sorry about that.

Ah, the critics of
mimehood never stop.

Like they always say,
a true artist is never

understood during his time.

[whooshing]

Just like your career,
Jazz Hands, your going down.

[cackling] So you think.

But you'll find that we
mimes are full of surprises.

We are silent, but violent.

[cackling]

[crying out]

Did he just
silent, but violent?

Apprentice mimes,
eliminate them.

Ah.

[growling]

[grunting]

Hey, check it out.

I'm miming.

[growling]

I deserve that.

[whooshing]

It's time for the
fingernail darts.

[whooshing]

[shouting]

Gladys, we need someone
to pick up some bad guys.

I'm sending over
some coordinates.

I won't let you
talkies ruin my plan.

The show is over, Jazz Hands.

Ah, mimes aren't quitters.

We never stop bringing
joy and pleasure

to audiences everywhere.

[whooshing]

Oh.

Whoa!

COMPUTER: This balloon
On out of control.

Gee, I never
would have guessed.

What's the matter, girls?

Not enjoying my performance?

How typical.

Unfortunately, you won't
be around for the encore.

Mime sense tingling.

COMPUTER: Help.

Sam.

[whooshing]

Why don't you just give up
and let mimes rule the world?

Do I really need
to answer that?

We can't keep this up.

We're going to need a plan.

[whimpering]

That's perfect.

Did ever you consider that
everyone hates your act

because you're not very good?

That's so untrue.

But yet your words hurt me.

What are you doing?

Unhand me.

Waa!

[shouting]

Here's my review of
your latest performance.

There isn't a cell
strong enough to hold me.

Mimes are resilient.

There's no way you'll stop me.

Alex, can we get
some quiet time.

[zapping]

Great job, spies.

Jazz Hands will have a long
time to perfect his craft

in our WOOHP detention center.

Thanks, Gladys.

It's good to have my voice back.

GLADYS: Luckily, we were
able to reverse the effects

on everyone Jazz Hands attacked
by careful manipulation

of his accordion.

Gladys, I have to know.

Did you ask out Jerry's
photocopier yet?

GLADYS: What are
you talking about?

Everyone knows that you have
a crush Jerry's photocopier

and you don't want
Jerry to know.

I think it's really cute.

Alex.

That was a secret.

That's it.

You leave us no choice.

I didn't mean it.

It just slipped out.

Just give me one more chance.

My photocopier?

GLADYS: Oh, please.

There's no time for
inter-office romances.

[giggling]

Today's topic is how a
smart girl can impress a boy.

As you know, the brain
is the major organ

of the central nervous
system and the control center

for all the body's activities.

The brain is also
an important tool

that can be used to show that
special someone that there is

more to you than meets the eye.

Sammy, it's your new
hunky boyfriend, Vincent.

Vincent, me was waiting.

You call your phone
to me thing call.

Me.

Uh, hey, even a smart
girl like myself

can have a brain freeze
every once in a while.