02x16 - S.P.I.

[bunniefuu]

[theme - moonbaby, "here we go"]

THEME SONG: Here we go,
we're getting on the road

till we stop, and
then we'll shop.

So one, two, three, now
baby, here we go, go, go.

Here we go, here we go,
on a mission undercover

and we're in control.

Here we go, here we
go, we're Totally Spies

so we'll get on with the show.

Here we go, here
we go, here we go.

[lasers sh**ting]

[yelling]

[panting heavily]

Huh?

Congratulations, gentlemen.

SPI is now ready for business.

I can't believe we're
actually at the mall.

It feels like forever
since we've been here.

Totally.

I mean, being spies
is fun and all,

but it really eats up your time.

What are you two
complaining about?

Didn't we go to
Paris last weekend?

Uh, Sam-- we went to Paris to
stop some international wacko

from licking paint off of all
the greatest works of art,

which, by the way,
was totally gross.

No way!

Chic Boutique is
hiring part time.

Every girl who's ever
worked at Chic Boutique

has gone on to
become a supermodel.

I know.

Our destiny as fashion
icons awaits us.

Whoa.

Hello?

Weren't you just talking about
not having a lot of spare time

on your hands?

Sammy, for Chic
Boutique, you make time.

CLOVER: Hi!

We're here for the
part-time jobs.

Here are your Chic
Boutique handbooks.

I suggest you study them
for your interviews.

- Interviews?
- Handbooks?

Um, couldn't you just
give us the jobs?

I mean, we're like, totally
your best customers.

Yeah, right-- you and every
other girl in Beverly Hills.

Huh?

Looks like you girls
have some competition.

Come on, Alex.

Nothing is going to get in the
way of us becoming supermodels.

We have some serious
studying to do.

[screaming]

Is it me, or does the
way we get moved sometimes

defy the laws of physics?

Not to mention the
laws of etiquette.

Time to focus, ladies.

We're currently
en route to London

to capture some criminals
who have stolen the world's

largest supply of diamonds.

And now, for your gadgets.

For this mission,
we have helmets

with infrared capability,
titanium drill heel boots,

laser lipstick, and a new gadget
that WOOHP labs just invented--

anti-gravity propulsion rings.

Wow!

[screaming]

Good luck, ladies.

And remember, WOOHP
is counting on you.

All right, girls.

Let's do a systems check.

ALEX: Infrared helmet, check.

Boy, it does get
dark early in London.

Turn your helmet around, Alex.

ALEX: Oh, that's much better.

Check.

Hey, I just remembered--

Chic Boutique's main store
is in the London mall.

What do you guys say we
wrap this thing up fast,

and head over there to see if
they'll give us some pointers?

That's a great idea, Clover.

[alarm ringing]

Diamond thieves at 9:00 sharp!

ALL: Whoa!

ALEX: What was that?

SAM: I don't know.

But they're headed for the
diamond thieves' truck.

[lasers sh**ting]

[gasps]

Did you see that?

ALEX: Uh-huh.

And that news crew caught
the whole thing on video.

[cameras flashing]

We're standing just
outside of London,

where an incredible
new anti-crime

organization has just
captured heavily-armed

diamond smugglers.

Let's now go to their
spokesperson, Geraldine Husk.

Good afternoon, everyone.

We are Super Protection
International, or SPI,

for short.

And you have just witnessed the
future of international crime

fighting.

The future of
international crime fighting?

So what does that make us?

Chopped liver?

Now, if you'll
all excuse us, we

must get these criminals
to our maximum security

holding facility.

I wonder if Jerry
knows about SPI.

We'd better give him a call.

I'm already here, girls.

Jerry?

I noticed something amiss,
so I landed the plane.

And as for the existence
of SPI, I'm afraid I'm as

surprised as the rest of you.

Those SPI agents
are like, so cute.

Hi, I'm Clover.

I'm a spy, too.

Maybe we could get
together sometime

and swap stories
and phone numbers.

- Out of my way.
- Huh?

Excuse us.

So, um, I'll talk
to you later then?

[crowd shouting]

Wow.

Did you guys see
that creepy tattoo?

Sorry, Sam.

I was too busy watching
out for Clover's drool.

So what do we do now, Jerry?

Well, it looks like we're
no longer needed here.

I guess we should all go home.

--where an incredible
new anti-crime

organization has just
captured heavily-armed

diamond smugglers.

This is too weird.

SPI was virtually
unknown before today,

and now they're
all over the news.

Well, I personally
think we should be glad

that another organization,
almost as good as WOOHP,

and super cute, is around to
pick up some of the slack.

Yeah.

Having SPI around gives us
more free time, which I totally

need if I'm ever
going to memorize

the Chic Boutique handbook.

Now, let's see.

Manager is out, The cash
register won't open,

and we've run out of
brown suede Chic pumps.

What do you do?

Uh-- tell everyone we're closed?

No, Alex.

It's a trick question.

Chic Boutique doesn't
sell any color but black.

Oh, right.

I knew that-- I think.

[compowder beeping]

Huh?

Sorry to interrupt you,
girls, but we have an emergency.

We've just received
an advanced tip

that a weapons plant in
Los Alamos, New Mexico,

is about to be infiltrated.

So much for more free time.

[screaming]

[screaming]

[crash]

Look!

It's SPI!

And Geraldine's giving
another press conference.

[crowd shouting]

And we would have
gotten away with it, too,

if it weren't for the
incredible ability of SPI.

I don't get it.

SPI beat us again.

[gasps]

Did you see that?

Yeah.

If I looked that
hairy in a dress,

I'd probably turn to
a life of crime, too.

No, Alex.

That woman had a tattoo
just like the one

I saw on the diamond thief.

So?

Lots of people have
similar tattoos.

Hi, it's me again.

I just wanted to thank you
guys personally for picking up

some of our slack.

Ugh!

All right.

I was willing to forgive
it the first time

out of professional courtesy,
but that was just totally rude.

[crowd shouting]

Aw.
CROWD: SPI!

SPI!
SPI!

SPI!

Ugh.

Anybody beginning to feel a
little like chopped liver?

Yeah.

Maybe SPI is better than WOOHP.

Come on, guys.

I guess there's no reason
to stay around here.

I don't know about
you guys, but I am

so glad to be back at school.

This whole SPI thing is
totally weirding me out.

[screaming]

And it just got even weirder.

All right, it's official.

The whole world has gone insane.

Let me guess.

You guys didn't know it
was SPI Appreciation Day?

It is like, so typical of you
losers to be out of the loop.

SPI Appreciation Day?

Hey, everyone!

SPI just solved a major
coup on San Banana Island!

STUDENT: Sweet.

Dude, SPI is so cool.

I love them.

Check it out!

I don't get it.

Why didn't Jerry call us
about the coup on San Banana?

Well, it could have
something to do with the fact

that Jerry's line has
been totally disconnected.

[screaming]

Jer, what's going on?

I'm afraid I have
some bad news, girls.

Huh?

SPI's efficiency has
put WOOHP out of business.

What?

How is that even possible?

The fact is, SPI
just out-spied us.

Does that mean we're
not spies anymore?

JERRY: I'm afraid so.

In fact, we'll probably
never see each other again.

SAM: No!

Wow.

Even though you were a
major pain sometimes, Jer,

we're totally going to miss you.

Yes, well, if
you'll excuse me,

I've got something in my eye.

I can't believe
this is happening.

Well, I guess there's no
reason for us to hang around.

This must be footage
from the coup SPI

thwarted on San Banana Island.

There's something about these
gorillas that looks familiar.

Coming, Sam?

You guys go ahead.

I'll catch up to you later.

Suit yourself.

We might as well get home
and try on our outfits

for our Chic
Boutique interviews.

I guess.

I mean, it's not like we've
got anything else to do.

This image
magnification machine

should give me some answers.

[beeping]

Just as I thought.

These tattoos are identical.

Now to test their voices.

SPI AGENT [ON COMPUTER]:
Out of my way.

WEAPONS INFILTRATOR
[ON COMPUTER]:

And we would have gotten
away with it, too.

And again at the same pitch--

SPI AGENT [ON
COMPUTER]: --my way.

WEAPONS INFILTRATOR [ON
COMPUTER]: --away with it.

Away with it.

Bingo!

They're the same person.

I think this calls
for a visit to SPI.

[drilling]

This must be Geraldine's office.

[gasps]

That was close.

Hm, that's odd.

Why would SPI have
schematics of all three crime

scenes that they thwarted--

unless they committed
the crimes themselves?

Hm?

The diamond thieves!

GERALDINE: My plan to
put WOOHP out of business

has worked perfectly, and now
the world is at our mercy.

It's time to go to Phase 2.

Prepare the jets!

Right away, boss.

I totally can't decide
between this black silk

top and wool skirt or this
black wool top and silk skirt.

Hello?

Earth to Alex!

Come in, Alex.

Sorry, Clover.

I guess I'm still in shock
about the whole WOOHP thing.

Well, snap out of it.

We've got a major fashion
crisis going on here.

[compowder beeping]

Hello?

[WHISPERING] Clover, it's Sam.

SPI is up to
something really evil.

You guys have to come to
their headquarters right away.

Look, Sam.

You're like, totally
going to have to let

go of this whole SPI thing.

It's like, so not healthy.

[WHISPERING] Clover!

You have to listen to me.

[crash]

Whoa!

Sam?

I think Sam's officially
gone off the deep end.

We'd better stop her before
she does something crazy.

SAM: Uh, hello.

The jets are ready, boss.

Excellent.

Well, what have we here?

It looks like we're about
to have more guests.

I'm a very busy woman, so
please, tell me quickly what it

is that I can do for you girls.

Well, you see, our friend
Sam has this crazy idea

that you guys are evil.

Actually, our friend Sam is
having a little trouble coping

with not being a spy anymore.

Huh?

And, well, we're
just wondering

if you've seen her around.

No.

Now if you'll excuse me--

Clover, look.

It's Sam's compowder.

In that case, we'd
better get going.

Oh!

[lasers sh**ting]

Ugh.

ALEX: Ah!

A clothes shrinking ray!

Preshrunk my butt!

Comfy, girls?

Well, now that you mention
it, I could use a latte.

Sorry, fresh out.

You lucky girls are going
to be the first to test

our g-force trainer
at full speed.

Oh, thanks.

But we'll pass.

Or how about we
start with the a-force

trainer and work our way up?

Why are you doing this?

I wanted to be a WOOHP
spy, but apparently

wasn't goody-goody
enough to make the cut.

So I started SPI to put
WOOHP out of business.

And now that there's
no one to stop me,

I'll be emptying out all
the world's money reserves.

You'll never get away with it.

Oh, I beg to differ.

When I turn this
switch to a full power,

you'll become part of
the permanent upholstery

of our g-force trainer c*ck.

[whirring]

ALL: Whoa!

But I don't want
to be upholstery!

Especially not
a polyester blend.

Let's try to kick the top off.

One, two, three!

It's getting faster!

We'd better think
of something quick!

But what?

All we have left is
a laser lipstick!

Alex, that's perfect!

Point the laser at the
c*ck panel and fire!

[laser sh**ting]

[beeping]

[crash]

ALL: Whoa!

[laser sh**ting]

Let's get out of here!

Time to show Geraldine
a little WOOHP action.

Wait!

Shouldn't one of us
press the distress button

on our compowders, just
in case Jerry's listening?

Great idea, Alex.

Oh!

[grunting]

Now to kick some SPI butt.

[gasps]

Huh?

[teeth chattering]

[laughing]

Ah!

Whoa!

[screaming]

[lasers sh**ting]

[yelling]

Looks like somebody's going
to be doing some new clothes

shopping, in prison.

SAM: Come on!

We've got to stop the
jets from taking off.

[grunting]

We're too late!

We've got to find
some way to stop them.

Huh.

Maybe this thing will help.

Careful, Alex.

[g*n firing rapidly]

[explosions]

Way to go, Alex.

Now, turn it around and
sh**t the other jet.

Whoa!

Quick.

Everyone into my jet.

We can still make it
to the Federal Reserve.

[lasers sh**ting]

SPI AGENT: What about
those annoying girls?

GERALDINE: Don't worry.

In a few moments, they'll
get a big surprise

when this place blows sky high.

[beeping]

[gasps]

Uh, girls?

I think we have
a bigger problem.

Huh?

ALL: A b*mb!

SAM: Quick!

Into that flying saucer.

[expl*si*n]

[screaming]

That was close.

Hey, looks like
they disappeared.

I think we passed them.

And look.

They're flying upside
down to show off.

That is so rude.

That's not them
flying upside down.

[screaming]

Hang on.

I hope this works.

Have a nice trip, girls!

[crashing]

[gasps]

[laser cutting]

I wouldn't write WOOHP
off so easily if I were you.

I don't know how you escaped
from that rocket saucer.

But no matter.

My SPI agents won't
let you off so easily.

[grunting and fighting]

SAM: These guys are really good.

I think they already
know that, Sam.

And to think we
never even got a chance

to test these ugly rings.

Alex, you're a genius.

I totally forgot about the
anti-gravity propulsion rings.

Hiyah!

Hiyah!

Whoa!

That'll teach you
to be rude to us.

Uh, guys?

Since we tied up Geraldine,
who's flying the plane?

[screaming]

[beeping]

[screaming]

ALL: Whoa!

Excellent job, spies.

How can we ever repay you?

Jerry!

Having a good time, girls?

- Yes.
- Totally.

Thanks, Jer.

It was so cool of Jerry
to give us this vacation

to thank us for saving WOOHP.

And you know what?

In all the excitement, I totally
forgot about those silly Chic

Boutique jobs.

Yeah.

Who needs part-time
jobs when you're

a full-time international spy?

Do you think Jer
will refill our sodas

again, if we ask him real nice?

Where did he go?

ALL: Hey!

Sorry, girls.

We had a sudden
emergency in Siberia.

Siberia?

Well, at least we won't have
to study some silly handbook.

[theme music]