01x01 - Watershed

[bunniefuu]

There was before the test

then there's after.

I figured it was time.

I didn't think

I would ever find someone.

I'm a bit of a weirdo, you know?

I took the test.

And I met my match.

I met my match alright.

I can't imagine life without him.

She made me feel alive again

for the first time in years.

Since the discovery

of the soul particle in 2023,

Soul Connex has helped

more than 15 million people

find their perfect match.

With over 20 000 clinics worldwide,

your soulmate is

one simple test away.

Honestly, it's like,

the best feeling ever.

It's what I've wanted all my life.

I honestly feel like I can fly.

You can find your happiness here.

Soul Connex. Your future is waiting.

Good afternoon, Soul Connex.

Do you have a reference number?

Yeah

Nicola? We're ready for you.

Hi, this is Soul Connex.

How can I help you?

Alright. We're going to

start the machine now.

It's perfectly harmless,

but if you want to stop at any time,

just raise your right hand.

Whose turn is it?

It's yours.

What?

Why did I drink so much last night?

Because you love the taste of wine.

-I do love the taste of wine.

-Uh-huh.

Alright. I got it.

No, stop.

Stop.

Love you.

Sammy, you need to eat.

Eat your food.

-No!

-Take that!

Come on, take that!

Franklin!

Come on, Sammy.

Mommy is grumpy today.

-No!

-Franklin, you're making this harder.

I'm sorry. Eat your food, Sammy.

Ella, have some banana please.

- Hey!

-Open front door.

We're in the kitchen.

Hey y'all! This arrived for you.

They got the address wrong again.

Hey, thanks.

Hey Frankie.

-I love it when you call me that.

-Oh, sorry, Franklin.

Thank you, Jennifer.

Nik, can I have a word?

Now?

It'll just take a few minutes.

-Uh

-It's personal.

Okay.

It's a medical issue.

-Yeah, fine.

-I got to go to work.

Five minutes. Come on.

Can you pick her up please?

Come on.

I got to go to work.

So do I need to

sterilize anything first, or?

Oh my God.

You're taking the test?

Booked and paid for.

-But

-Don't say "But you're married".

-But you are. Married.

-I know. Yes.

And I think to the wrong guy.

What about the kids?

Ugh, I knew you'd judge me.

No, I'm not judging you, I'm

Okay, yeah, no,

I'm judging you a little bit.

Honestly,

I thought you'd be on my side.

You and me, we got married too young,

and now with the test,

things have changed.

I mean, not for me.

Yeah, you were lucky.

You married the right guy.

Imagine if you were married to

someone like Steve.

Jen.

You're having a moment, yeah?

It's okay, it happens, it's marriage,

but have you ever thought

that maybe you're having a

Maybe you're having

a mid-life crisis.

I look around me and

I see people living their best lives.

Like they've found the answer

to some secret. And I hate them.

I really hate them.

And I also want to be one of them.

Well, I hope you know

what you're doing.

Does it sound like me?

Not even a little bit.

Will you come with me to the clinic,

for support?

No, I don't

-Please, Nikki.

-Come on.

I'm scared I won't

go through with it.

Maybe that's a good thing.

In my head, it's already happened,

it would just be

putting off the inevitable.

Where's Mommy? Come on.

Mommy's there.

Please?

Uh

Okay.

Okay.

You've always been

my favorite babysitter.

-No, I mean neighbor.

-Come on.

Bye.

There was before the test

Nikki! I got to go to work!

Coming!

Honey, can you

do your top button up please?

-Why? Why should I?

-Why?

Nikki! I got to go to work!

We're going to a wedding,

it's polite.

We're going to be late.

Nuh-uh. We'll be fine.

No, I can't be late to

my own brother's wedding.

We'll be fine

We're always late, it's

It's just part of our charm.

Uh, I don't want it to be

"our charm".

I feel like we've been at a wedding

every week.

That's because we have.

Sammy, come on.

-Sammy.

-I'm not giving these back.

Well you have to,

because I don't like you.

-Oh, that's not very nice to Mommy.

-Hey, that's not nice.

I'm giving these back,

but you can't

Behave yourself, or if you don't,

I'm going to grab your foot,

and I'm going to take your shoe,

and I'm going to

make your shoe my shoe!

-Franklin! Come on.

-Okay, my bad.

We're going to be late.

We'll be fine.

Sh, sh, sh, honey. Come on baby.

Alright.

big test today, and

Oh, wow! Hey guys!

-Peter, we are truly sorry.

-Hi.

Yeah, that's my sister, everyone.

Hello. Uh As you were.

Hey, uh, hey Nik?

Your new sister-in-law.

Hi! Wow.

-You're beautiful.

-Thank you.

-Hi.

-Yes she is. Yeah, I told you, right?

Yeah. You did.

So I'm going to get back to

my wedding now, if that's

Is that okay?

-Please do.

-Alright, so where, um

Six weeks ago, I was, uh

Well, I was approaching fifty,

I was single, I was depressed.

I was eating Hot Pockets

every single night.

I think I was what is

technically known as "a real catch".

Uh, so I thought, why not?

I mean, it is science, right?

So I took the test.

And, uh

And it was this unbelievable woman.

And two weeks later,

my soulmate is now my wife.

Yeah, I know, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, right?

So, a toast to my beautiful wife.

And Rose, I'm so happy you said yes.

Let's get drunk.

Not you.

That's your Uncle Peter.

Two people,

who grew up on the same street,

took the test,

and found out they were soulmates.

We didn't just grow up together,

we were high school sweethearts.

- You know

- Hey babe.

the likelihood of you

being soulmates are, what

-Hey.

- one in ten million?

So tell me, what did you think

when you got the results?

- So--

- Uh--

-No, you go first.

- Woohoo!

I mean, I couldn't believe it.

A dream come true.

Such a dream.

How was my day?

Now, tell me about how you first met.

Well, it's funny you should ask.

It was long, but you know,

it was okay.

Danny still pretends

he can't do numbers

so I had to reform

all of the accounts

in accordance with the new tax codes.

It was epic. Yeah.

The janitor slow clapped me

on my way out.

I never saw her again, um

Hm?

Never mind.

Why are you watching this crap?

When did we stop being

the normal ones?

What do you mean?

This. Us.

You're looking at it.

I'm going to take a shower.

I know they say

you know when you know,

but I really did.

I just knew it, I always knew it.

So you guys are really lucky.

- Yeah.

-Ha, yeah.

I mean here we are,

we're proof, you know?

Well this is too cute!

So I just pulled my pants up

and got the hell out of there.

-What?!

-Yeah.

But hey.

I want to give it up to, uh

my wife - holy sh*t!

-Uh

-So weird hearing you say that.

For uh, making the food

and getting everyone together.

I feel like we got it backwards,

right? You know?

First, a wedding, and then

we get to meet each other's friends.

So, so like, Peter,

you took the test first?

Uh-huh, yeah.

Yeah. And I was a month later?

Yeah, it was a long month.

And did you guys, like,

feel the feel the "pull"?

What's the "pull"?

It's this thing that people say,

the feeling when

their match has taken the test,

they get a sense that someone is

out there, looking for them.

So is it true, or is it bullshit?

So it is true!

I was with someone else, so

It was a little complicated.

Sorry.

No, it's fine. It's fine! Right?

Go ahead.

Tell everyone about Russell.

Okay, I was with a guy,

named Russell

Such a dumb name, right?

-Stop it! Go ahead.

Tell everyone about Russell.

-Stop it!

-Russell!

Anyway

There were all these things about him

that never bothered me before,

and they really started to get to me,

you know? Too much.

It got in my head, you know,

it just kept on going

round and round. It was insane.

So I took the test, and, I guess,

on some level I was hoping

it would be Russell, because

Anyway! It showed up Peter.

Yes!

And that was that.

You know, I ended it the next day,

I met Peter, and, uh

You say it.

-It was undeniable.

-Yeah.

I have never been happier.

I'm going to be sick!

I know, I know, we're gross.

Yeah, so now we have

death, taxes and love.

Certainty sucks.

Hey, you guys.

You're married, right?

Have you had the talk?

Adele, just leave it.

All married couples have to have

the talk. You've never had the talk?

No.

No, we have never had the talk,

no, it's not a thing, it's just

It's never been on our radar.

We met at college,

we've been married fifteen years

-Yeah.

-We've got two beautiful kids.

-Yeah you do.

-Yeah.

Hey, well

Maybe you're soulmates anyway.

Maybe.

-We had the talk.

-Here we go

We had to! It's practical.

Hey, did you see their smug faces?

Who?

My old-a*s smug brother

and his new perfect person.

What are you talking about?

Come on. "It was undeniable."

Please, it was a rebound.

Yeah.

I mean,

he did leave out the part where

he got horribly dumped by Laney.

Yeah! You know, I liked Laney.

And what about Rose's ex?

Russell? Poor guy.

What did he ever do wrong?

Yeah. Poor Russell.

Who we've never met.

Poor Russ. Russy.

Yeah I should call him up,

see if he wants to go for a beer.

Make sure he's okay.

Well No, because if I know Russ,

he's actually already moved on,

because he's super hot.

He's a real guy's guy too.

And Rose left him for Pete.

Total dumbass.

That health and safety meeting

they made us do today

was beyond ridiculous.

A health and safety story.

Sounds like a great time

for me to k*ll myself.

You're so rude.

Hi, this is Soul Connex.

Sure. One moment.

Jennifer? We're ready for you now.

Will it hurt?

Oh, not at all.

Oh God, wish me luck.

Good luck, you maniac.

-You'll wait for me, right?

-Yeah.

So how long does it take

to get the results?

Uh, that really depends if

your match is on the system already.

And if they are, we'll find out

Hi.

He's Argentinian!

-Oh!

-He lives in Argentina!

Oh wow!

Sebastian. He's got kind eyes, right?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, uh, okay, wow.

So what happens now?

Uh, they send him my details,

we contact, and then

I don't know. I've always wanted

to go to Argentina.

-Really?

-Well, I don't know.

What about Steve?

We'll work it out.

Okay.

Thank you.

Show me how to do it.

Slow down. Oh my God.

Okay, wait!

Ow!

Hey! Wow.

Hi Nikki.

Hey sweetheart.

Do you have water?

I thought Rose was joining us.

-Yeah, well, she's not.

-Why not?

-Because she's not, okay?

-Peter!

Calm down,

this is The Castle of Bounce.

Sorry.

-What's happened?

-We just had a fight.

Like an actual big, stupid fight.

What did you do?

Why are you already taking her side?

Because I know you.

Oh.

Hey, I'm sorry.

What happened?

We were just joking around,

and, uh

She asked me how many people

I'd had with.

Uh-huh.

Her number w--

Hey guys.

Her number was five more than mine.

Five.

-Five! Right?

-So what?

I-I knew it, I knew it.

-What?

-Just you and your smuggy smugness.

At the wedding, and you're having

dinner parties, and showing off,

and you're having arguments

like the rest of us normals.

You're almost fifty,

it's embarrassing you're like this.

Thanks for your continued support.

Ooh, in the eye!

See? You're a child.

So how long have you been together?

Six weeks, right?

Uh, yeah.

And how many people

has she slept with in that time?

-None.

-None?

-None.

-None.

I'm sorry, what was that?

-None!

-None?

Maybe one? No, none.

See. There's no problem.

You're the problem.

You and your double standards.

How do you and Franklin do it?

Uh

Miles on the clock?

It's that simple?

Yeah, we just

Just work it out.

Ah, you just work it out!

-Yeah.

-You just work it out.

Oh, hey honey.

-Alright, that's my cue.

-Yeah.

Get moving, old man.

-Get out of here.

-Okay, come on.

Oh my God.

-I'm out.

-I got it.

There you go.

Want to go try something else?

Thank you.

Dale says

they ordered too much booze,

so we got to get wrecked.

Well tell Dale I won't let him down.

They met three weeks ago.

Of course they did.

Who are we sitting with?

-You're not going to like it.

-Please, not

-Not Amelia?

-Mm-hm.

And all those had to be approved,

and signed, independently.

Can you imagine?

Not in any way, Amelia.

Nothing like the Friedrichsson case,

of course.

It took months to file and register

all those forms.

I was dreaming about them

by the end of it.

They automatically

back everything up now.

That's right.

But back in the paper days,

it would have been horrendous.

-Yeah.

-I'd have had to quit.

I mean Me too.

-You feel the same?

-I think so.

You get overloaded.

It's a lot, you know,

it takes, it takes

You want to come dance?

-Oh, yeah.

-Yeah?

-Yeah, okay.

-Yes!

That'd be great!

Sorry, I hope you don't mind,

I just

Excuse me, Amelia.

I got to go dance with my wife.

Thank you.

Yeah, you're welcome.

Let me just

-Better.

-Thanks.

So?

What?

What did I do to deserve that?

Come here.

Up here! Let's go.

Here, come on.

-People are going to see.

-I love you.

-No. I love you.

-People are going to see.

I work with these people, Nikki.

Come on, they're too close.

-No.

-They're just there.

-Stop it, stop it.

-Come on, come in here--

Stop it! Stop.

What are you doing?

I'm just trying to be spontaneous.

Yes, well,

we're at a client's wedding.

They've got their family here.

I've got colleagues here,

Nikki, seriously.

What the hell's going on?

I'm

Nothing.

Fra-- Nothing.

We're really going to do this?

We're not going to be silent

for 24 hours this time, Nikki.

I'm not doing that, okay?

We're going to talk this out.

There's

There's nothing to talk about.

I'm fine.

Well, you're not fine.

Yes, I am.

-No, you're not.

-I'm fine!

I'm fine, we're fine,

everything's fine.

Yeah, our marriage,

it's completely fine. Right?

I don't look any deeper,

or ask any questions,

or just question it.

Let's just keep everything fine.

Well, it's always been

more than that to me.

What if it's not enough?

Oh my God.

Is this about the g*dd*mn test?

Is that it?

That's it.

You want to take that test,

is that it?

-Do you?

-No.

Hey, Franklin. Franklin.

Stop.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.zonDefaultStyle"Hey! Hey, step back! Come on!

Let's get some sleep. We're tired.

Stop it! Just Don't

Stop it, get off me!

Stop it! Just talk to me, just--

Steve! Hey!

-Stop it! Stop!

-Hey hey hey, Steve!

Stop!

Steve! Calm down, Steve!

-Russell!

Take it easy!

Hey hey hey, it's okay.

You're alright. No no no, it's okay.

So that went well.

He said he's going to

take the kids away from me.

Oh honey, no, come on.

He wouldn't do that.

He won't even

let me back in the house.

Well, you can stay

here as long as you need.

No, no, it's okay, I've found

a place nearby for when Seb arrives.

Seb? Your match? He's coming here?

Yeah, he's going to quit his job

and move here for good.

Jen, you don't even know him.

I don't have to know everything

to know how I feel about him.

Man, this is crazy.

It's not crazy.

Yes it is. You're living

in a bullshit fairy tale.

What did you think would happen?

That Steve would just

understand it all,

and end eighteen years of marriage

by hugging it out?

I don't want to lie anymore, Nik.

Why? Because you deserve to be happy

if it means hurting everyone else?

It's not love, Nik.

-It doesn't matter.

-It matters to me.

That's because

you're a selfish person.

Jen, I didn't That's not

Basically, I'm sorting

the whole thing on my own, I don't

Hey, can you pass the salad?