01x03 - Austin

[bunniefuu]

Last week in Miami...

This is how Kesun felt
about her Miami matches on paper.

None of them are really my type.

This is how she felt
when she met Larry in the flesh.

Larry is definitely, like,
the only contender so far.

For my husband.

I'm looking forward to the call.

Can I?

This is the moment
Ash felt the heat in Miami.

I do like her a lot.

This is the question
that left her cold.

Yes.

I mean...

Turns out, it was.

Oh, my God.

But love works in mysterious ways.

This is the porn star
that left Kris in the lurch.

This is the match
who had more than meets the eye.

He's got perfect taste, I think.

And here's the kiss that ended
a surprisingly perfect date.

I wanna see Derek again.
Like, absolutely.

This is the man
Reagan got deep with over dinner.

I'm saying some pretty dark sh*t
right now, and you're just, like

chewing pizza.

This is the limb
she went out on over dessert.

I would like to hang out again.

- Would you?
- Yes, I would.

This is how she felt
after they said goodbye.

I like Don, but I'm a flight risk.

I'm trying to fix it.

This is the burning question
they all left Miami with.

So, did anyone get railed?

Maybe in Austin.

Four single New Yorkers

put their hearts
into the hands of this film crew

who whisked them across the country
on a dating adventure

and do the swiping for them.

This is Swiping America.

A rom-doc in eight parts.

I mean, yeah, when you're a top,
you know, you are...

topping a person.

To f*ck a girl with a strap-on?
That is a lot of legroom.

Like, a lot of core and sh*t.

Honestly, it made me
respect men so much more

when I started having sex with women.

Y'all are doing the mostest.

So, yeah, I squat.

- Hello. Come on in.
- Hello.

Welcome to Forbidden Fruit.

Keeping Austin kinky since 1981.

Let's go around and look at
all the fun stuff that we've got.

- Candle play.
- Oh, sh*t.

Kama Sutra products, massage oils.

A Pecker Party ring toss?
I'm into that.

- I love peckers.
- Here, this is...

Directly behind you

different kinds of dildos,
dildos, more dildos.

We've got
a couple of glass items as well.

Everything's a dildo
if you're brave enough.

Masturbation sleeves.

These are for people with penises.

I got one of those last week.

And then over here is our tush toys.

I'll get that for Don,
he loves bananas.

We've got collars here.

And then over here, we're getting
more into our impact play.

It's a c*ck cage.

It's designed to prevent a person
from getting an erection.

Naughty.

And last but not least, our lubes.

Straight silicone is absolutely
ideal for manual and a**l play.

There's a high level
of absorption back there

a lot of people don't realize.

And then over here, our BDSM stuff.

Your experienced players refer to
people just starting out as vanilla.

- That's me.
- Vanilla play.

I'm usually more yellow,
but I guess I'll take vanilla.

Well, actually, we'll go
French vanilla, too, so...

I don't do, like, bondage.

It's probably
the control freak in me.

Absolutely not.

What if there's a fire? I'm dead.

Did you like the length on that one?

This one actually may be pretty good.

- This one is great.
- Yeah.

Rechargeable on a USB port.

Oh, good God.

- Oh, God.
- Tickle!

I've learned a lot today.

I think you've opened up
my mind creatively, like

there's just a lot of things
I'm not doing.

- Yeah.
- Same.

There's so many things I'm not doing.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Cheers, guys.
- Cheers to Austin.

Cheers.

- Ready to see your matches?
- Yes.

- Did you get one, Kesun?
- I did.

- Oh, he's so cute.
- What's his deal?

- His name is Tyler.
- Let me see him.

- He's got nice arms.
- Oh, hello.

He's ripped.

"Easy going and goal-oriented.

Looking for someone who is
motivated and loves to travel."

I think that's me!

I got one. Fernando.

Oh, hi, Fernando.

He's 35, he's 5'11".
He's a Sagittarius.

He's a weightlifter, drama nerd.
He's got a dog.

- That dog's really cute.
- Dog's cute. I would date the dog.

I have Madalyn, who's 28.

She's a costume designer.

So that can just be
an interesting conversation.

Her friends say
she's loyal, sentimental

a little eccentric, goofy.
She's cute.

Oh, I got a match.

My first is Prince.
This guy's got a sick body.

Hello, Prince.

- Look how cute his smile is.
- He's so cute.

- He's so cute.
- He's super cute.

Yeah, he's a writer, he's a Cancer.

I've dated a couple
of Cancers before.

They can't handle me,
but we'll see what Prince can handle.

He looks like he can handle a lot.

- Yeah.
- Tell you that right now.

- Okay.
- Tell you that right now.

Oh, Ryan. Hello.

- Kentucky born and raised.
- Ryan's cute.

- Wait, show me.
- I like that.

This man is 6'5".

- Do you care about height?
- I do.

I do.

- You have two more?
- I got... I have a lot.

Laurie looks like
she's very f*cking strong. Yeah.

In a good way, yeah.

- Javdee?
- Javdee.

Cute pose. She has cute hair.
She's adorable.

"Looking for someone
to have picnics with

eat whatever I cook

and hear me rant about my love
of movies and Sherlock Holmes."

She's 5'6" and she's an Aquarius.

I'd like another one.

I got one.

Oh, my God, he's hot.

Howdy.

He's playing the stand-up bass.

He's 6'6".

Yes!

Oh, my God.

I love it.

I'm going to meet
my husband in Austin.

I don't know,
maybe I'll marry one of them.

- Who knows?
- Exactly.

We forgot our sex toys.

Has anyone seen my butt plugs?

- Oh, my God.
- Let's roll.

Okay. Let's go.

Texas is just so, like, American.

I'm excited to meet Texas men.

Texans.

Texmens.

We're in Austin.

I'm hoping for some
wild, wild westerns.

Where the lesbians at?

A composite of the perfect man for me

if we're talking strictly physical,
it would be

probably Marlon Brando
in Streetcar Named Desire.

The face, the buff arms

and the T-shirt that's, like,
too small, probably meant for a baby.

But with, like, Brad Pitt's style
and abs from Fight Club.

Elvis's top lip.

Robin Hood's entire vibe is iconic.

The cartoon one.

- And Ross's c*ck.
- That's crazy.

Do you know what a himbo is?

Okay, a himbo is a male bimbo.
A him-bo.

Kronk is, like,
certainly an archetype.

Like, I love a big, hulking man.
I love an oaf of a man.

He's like a gentle giant.

So attractive, so sweet,
so supportive.

But also, like, down to be silly.

Adrien Brody's nose.
Brad Pitt's body.

No! Jason Momoa's body.

Like a cross between
Jason Momoa and Brad Pitt

and someone with a big a*s nose.

Angelina Jolie.

All of her.
I would love all of Angelina Jolie.

When I'm writing
characters and stories

I'm trying to find the deeper meaning

and the intention behind everything.

And so, I'm always
processing my relationships

and I'm always trying to learn
and grow from them.

I remember always hearing
when I was younger

dating is so easy
when you're younger.

I actually disagree with it a lot.

I think dating is
very challenging at all ages.

And now that I am 38

I think that I would like
to be married

and find, like, a long-term partner.

But then I'm like, I don't know
if that's possible for me.

I think I'm very hard to satisfy

because I have now found someone
who is handsome

and interesting, and smart

and very interested and accepting

of my strange situation
with my daughter.

But I do think I have hesitations.

Sometimes I have to establish, like,
the pace that's comfortable for me.

I have a dating condition, and it is
keeping people at a distance.

I don't know how many men
have the patience for it

is the truth.

Like, you have to be
willing to hold out for a while

to see if I'm ever going to be okay
holding hands.

God, she's so pretty, holy sh*t.

This is, like,
the most adult thing ever.

Gotta have your vitamins with a beer.

Balance.

And if you were, it's fine.

If you were, I don't care.

Since I left Miami,
Derrick and I text back and forth

just keeping in touch
with each other.

You know, I wanna
keep in touch with him

but I also wanna be present
with what's going on here.

I'm very open

to seeing what could happen
with other people in other cities.

Hello. How you doing?

- Hello.
- How are you?

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Hello.
- Pleasure to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.
- Yeah.

- How are you?
- Good, how are you?

Good.

Hi.

Hi.

- Nice to meet you, I'm Ryan.
- Hey.

- Nice to meet you.
- Yeah, very nice to meet you.

- Thanks for coming.
- Absolutely.

- How's it going?
- Going good.

Good.

- Sorry.
- All good.

Cool. Well, cheers to...

- what, an interesting experience?
- Yeah.

I'm so glad you're here.

- I like your shirt.
- Thank you.

- Is it vintage?
- It is.

You totally look like a fashion icon.

- You do.
- Oh, thank you.

- I love your outfit.
- Thank you.

Oh, I like your top. So fun.

It looks like you're from
the '30s or the '40s or something.

Well, I'm glad you said that

because I want to tell you
that I'm 85 years old.

Kinda look like my grandma.

So, Reagan, tell me
a little bit about yourself.

- I'm a writer.
- Okay.

- And you're a writer as well?
- Yeah... I love it.

Words are in my blood, I guess, so...

- What do you like to write?
- Poetry.

I fell in love with the rhythm of...

of words and how it sounds.

And how... there are times...

whenever you just forget... about...

Sorry. Give me a moment.

I know.

I was born in San Antonio.

Raised all over the South.

Did some time in Atlanta.

Did some time like I went to prison.
I did not, I promise.

So, what are the things that you like
about New York City?

There's a certain and very specific
energy about New York

that can't really be duplicated.

Annoying?

I'm also really social,
like, really socially competent.

And yet, I find myself annoyed
by most people.

Had a nice late night, last night.

Played... played some music.

I play in band.

I ended up going backpacking

through Central and South America
for about six months.

What's your favorite place
in South America?

Well, I love Costa Rica.

That's Central.

It is.

You're very picky, you said.

I didn't say that.

Did I?

What's your favorite dream?

I really would love
to meet Willie Nelson.

'Cause he's like a...
He's like the North Star

that's always pointing
the right direction in the sky.

That's a great answer.

Have you been single for a while?
Do you date a lot?

I don't date a lot.

Kinda just focused on getting
settled in out here in Austin

doing a little bit of soul-searching
and figuring out who I am.

- So what about you?
- I've been single

for, like, four years now.

So, like, with dating, are there
certain things that you look for?

Yeah, I think
the biggest thing for me is

if you're close with your family

because I spend most of
my free time with my family.

Oh, I'm definitely in the same boat,
like, super close with my family.

You know, if you're my person,
like, you're a part of our family.

You know, I want you
to be a part of it. So, yeah.

So sweet. Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, our time has come.

- Nice chatting with you, so...
- Nice to meet you, Andrew.

Good luck with everything.

- Enjoy the rest of your day.
- Thank you, you too.

Thank you, Prince.

- Bye.
- Good day.

That was so boring.

- Thank you for having me.
- Thank you for coming.

- It was nice to meet you.
- All righty.

- Thank you. Nice to meet you.
- Bye. Nice to meet you.

That went super quick, though.
You're really easy to get along with.

Oh, good. I'm glad to hear that.

Thank you so much for coming.
It was really lovely to meet you.

- Hopefully... I'll see you again.
- Absolutely. You, too. Yeah.

- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

Oh, my gosh. What a cutie.

Oh, my God. I think I'm sweating.

He's like a Southern version
of Jason Momoa.

I think I'm getting married.

Can I have another one of these?

Thanks.

I feel like my personality
is drained right now.

It's been so much work.

No one's asked me sh*t about me.

I just have to be like, "Cool story.

I've got one, too,
if you'd like to hear."

I think I had bad matches.

Yeah, I have to pick.

Decisions, decisions.

We're gonna pop a bottle
to your husbands.

To my engagement.

I feel good about it.

- You wanna jump on the trampoline?
- Yes.

Oh, my God.

I'm having a heart attack.

Oh, my God.

Someone said that...

the stars in Texas
are, like, way bigger.

Should we go inside?

Yeah, let's get some more booze.

Oh, Ash FaceTimed me.
Let's FaceTime her.

- Hello.
- Hello, ma'am. What are you doing?

I've been drinking champagne all day.

- Can you save us some?
- Yeah.

- How's it going over there?
- It's going.

I hear we're going
on a date tomorrow. I'm excited.

We are. We have our first
double date together.

You're gonna meet my fiancé.

Listen, I'm so excited
to see all of this.

I need to find someone
that fits that mood.

What's for dinner?
That's really why I called.

- Tequila.
- Okay, cool.

- Just hurry up with your date.
- All right. Bye.

- Hi.
- Hi. How are you?

- Ashley?
- Ashley.

- Are you a hugger?
- Yeah.

- It is so nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

- How are you?
- Good.

- Hi, how're you doing?
- Nice to meet you.

Yeah, nice seeing you.

Welcome to Austin, Texas.

Cheers.

Well, on brand,
I spilled that already.

Honestly, I've been spilling
all night, so it's totally fine.

So, what do you like to do
in your free time?

I love going to the gym.
That's, like, the thing.

I'm a movie buff,
so I'll go to a movie.

- I'm obsessed with donuts.
- Okay.

Donuts are my love language,
it's true.

Fantasy. Vampire fiction.

I really love being in bed
for ten hours a day

and just, like, watching sh*t on TV,
and, like, not doing anything.

I like going outdoors a lot. Picnics.

- I like to go swimming.
- Okay.

I just love talking to strangers.
It's like one of my favorite things.

Playing dumb is actually
a strong suit of mine.

It gets me through a lot
of really awkward moments.

My best friend
just came out as a l*sbian.

And she's been like
the straightest person

I've ever known in my life.

I'm praying that for my sister.

I prayed that for my sister
but then she married a man, so...

Okay, girl, that's cool too!

- Someone has to do it.
- Women are better at sex.

Yeah, women are obviously...

We don't have to whisper that.
Women are better at sex.

- You were in the Marine Corp.
- I was.

- That's crazy.
- Yeah.

- I dated a Marine.
- Okay. How'd it go?

- He was my first boyfriend.
- Okay.

I quickly realized I was g*y.

- So...
- So I mean, like

- It went okay.
- net positive.

Net positive.
Yeah, yeah, that's cool.

How did you manage the pandemic?

I had a partner at the beginning
of the pandemic.

- Oh, no.
- It started with me

hunkering down with another person.

It didn't end well, obviously.

I hunkered down
with my fluffy c*ck.

- Oh, very cute.
- George.

So, he didn't leave.

- We're still good. We're still good.
- Good for you.

Tell me about, like, your red flags.

I was about to ask you a question.

- Oh, my red flags?
- In a relationship. Yeah.

I want all of you.
I want you to have all of me.

And, like, sometimes,
I think, I tend to...

put a lot of pressure.

That might be a red flag.

I didn't mean your personal one,
but, like, that also works.

I love that shirt, by the way.

- Thank you.
- It's so cute.

- Yeah, you're handsome.
- Thank you.

You're handsome, as well.

I asked my mom, "What's a good
question you would ask?"

She was, like,
"Ask him if he'll do the dishes."

Oh, my God! Wow.
So you don't do the dishes?

- I hate doing the dishes.
- I hate doing the dishes too.

- I got your photos yesterday.
- Yeah.

- You're pretty.
- Oh, thanks!

Well, I think that's all the time
we have for today.

- But it was nice to meet you.
- Damn. Okay.

I had a really good time.
This was a great conversation.

- It was very nice to meet you.
- It was nice to meet you too.

- Be well.
- See you.

- Hope I'll see you again.
- Yeah, yeah. Bye.

- All right. Bye.
- Oh, guys. Ran into the couch.

It's okay. I run into things
all the time.

Don't trip down the stairs.

There's just something
about Nicholas.

He's, like, handsome, smart, witty.

There's, like, an instant connection.
And you're just, like...

"This is it." He's also so hot.

I'm sorry. It's insane.

Could I imagine a date
with any of these women?

I feel like that's not a question
I want to answer right now.

I feel like
that's part of my issue too

is that I make decisions too quickly

and I don't, like, sleep on things.

I don't know.
Just won't think about it.

That's my sister!

Hello?

What are you
drinking? Tequila?

Prosecco.
We just took a shot.

I had two spicy margaritas.

And then a glass of champagne
and then a shot

and then a glass of Prosecco.

See ya later!

Sounds like you're having
an amazing time.

So you like the one?

Yeah, Ryan.

He was really, like,
really just sweet and, like, calm.

And he was talking...
He's really close with his sister.

- Okay. That's cute.
- It was really cute.

Interesting.

I think it's really important
to have a close family ties.

My mom, and my sister, and I
have always been very, very close.

We had a really good relationship
growing up.

I had a very idyllic, I think,
kind of childhood.

We grew up in the suburbs
of Maryland.

You know, my mom, she'd walk us
to school in the mornings.

And my dad and I,
we had a special relationship.

He really babied me, like, a lot.

Very nice, did you ask him
if he would go anywhere?

He was, like, I'm not completely set
on Austin for the rest of my life

but I really like it here, and I like
having my sister really close by.

He's the older one

and it's just him and his sister,
and it's really cute.

My parents,
when they were together...

I was completely oblivious

that there were any problems
in their relationship.

But they got divorced
when I was a senior in high school.

And I came home from school
one day, and he just was gone.

Like, him and all of his stuff
was gone.

He left and I saw him again
at my high school graduation

which was, like,
a couple of months after that.

And then I haven't seen him
since then.

I haven't spoken to him in 18 years.

My sister and my mom,
like, really shielded me

from a lot of the stuff
that I think was happening.

I have such a strong family,
like, without him.

My sister just had a baby.

She is my favorite person
on the planet.

If I meet someone who

knows that I want to get married
and have kids

they probably would be thinking,
"Well, you're already 35

so, like, what are the chances
of that actually happening for you?"

Or that I'm... need to,
like, really, like, rush into it.

Or like hurry up with it.

But I don't feel any of those things.
I feel great.

I totally am, like,
an eternal optimist.

I laugh at everything.

I think wasting time being unhappy
is just so tragic.

I got these boots in Nashville.

I painted them this,
like, mirror silver color.

And then I hand stoned them,
one by one.

They're not rhinestones.
They're actually Swarovski crystals.

But every time I wear them,
I have to, like, repair them slightly

because there's so many
crystals flying off.

It's just the way they are.

So, in Austin, I decided
to choose Phil.

Because Phil is the most
unlike anyone I've ever met.

He's a country singer
and a musician and...

a cowboy.

Phil and I are going to
go two-step dancing.

I'm excited.

I could, like, never rob a bank

or sneak up on anyone
with these, because they...

You can hear me from the other room.

Ross was like a perfect choice
for Asheville.

He really was like a southern boy.

Don was the perfect choice for Miami
'cause he's, like, an artist.

And Phil's a perfect choice
for Austin because he's a musician.

It's great.

- Cool, right?
- Yeah.

Let me see it!

Ooh, that's cute.

I sent a picture to my mom
and she goes, "I can see your bra."

Yes, mom, that was intentional.
What shoes are you wearing?

- My Fendi boots.
- Hey, girl.

I'm chilling today.

I went on... I think it was
four dates yesterday.

And, like, I had a really great
conversation with Madalyn.

I do think she's attractive.

I think we connected
on, like, an emotional level.

Like, travel, and just how
she looks at the world

I really appreciated.

I was going to take Madalyn

on, like, the double date
with Kesun today.

But she has, like, a wedding
so, that's not happening.

But on Sunday, I asked Madalyn
to have coffee with me.

So, I think I'm just gonna chill.

I just had a brownie.

And I'm having a beer.

I'm having a cozy, yummy day.

I'm excited to see if there's, like,
an actual connection with Ryan.

I think that would be really cool.

Did I tell you that Ryan was hot?

- Hey!
- Hey, how are ya?

- Good to see you again.
- Nice to see you.

- Let's get inside.
- Oh, yeah.

- Hi.
- How are ya?

- Is this for here or to go?
- For here, please.

- What you need?
- I think we're gonna do

some of the brisket

some of the sausage.

And then you wanna do
the ribs as well?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, we'll go with that.

God, it smells so good.

Cool, thank you.

Get ready for our tequila shots.

- Shots first.
- Cool.

All right, you tell me when
because I am no bartender, so...

That's good.

- That's a big shot.
- It is a big shot.

- All right.
- All right.

To...

a successful first date?

- Yeah.
- All right.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Easy.
- Not too bad.

All right.

- Let's start with music.
- Oh, okay.

I feel like you can
get to know a person

pretty well, by their taste in music.

Yeah, I would agree with that.

Typically, I'm really into oldies.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Like, I love Queen.

Okay, like classic rock oldies?

- Yeah.
- Okay, I gotcha.

It's not like I only listen to that

but, like, when I'm getting ready,
I like to listen to Queen.

- It makes me happy.
- Okay.

Do you have a go-to Queen song?

I like Fat Bottom Girls.

The song, or like, in general?

- The song.
- Okay, okay.

- That's a whole other conversation.
- Yeah! Ryan, we just met!

I gotta... I gotta know, right?

Like, let's get it
out of the way early.

Fortunately, I'm very, very straight.

I think that's fortunate
for both of us. 'Cause I am as well.

Cool, cool.

I'm curious, would you say
you've been in love before?

Yeah. Yeah, I've had that twice.

I've had two, like, very serious
relationships in my life.

But I didn't have my first love
until I was, like, 23.

Really?

- Okay.
- But when I met someone

and I fell in love, it was like

- I was hit with a freight train.
- Yeah.

I mean, I dove all the way in.

As I say, I get that.
I get that kind of vibe from you

that you would be like
an either all in or all out, like...

I'm either not into it, or like,
you're going to get 110% of me.

- Totally. Yeah.
- I'm the same way.

If we're doing this
and we've made the commitment...

Yeah, exactly.

The bass is wonderful.

Yeah, the bass is what you feel
in your heart.

The bass is
what you feel in your heart

in your butt, in your feet.

I'm going to ask a dumb,
like, first date question, but...

What... What type of pizza?

- What toppings do you get?
- I love... Hawaiian is my favorite.

- Oh, my God. It's the only answer.
- Really?

- Oh, my God. I love Hawaiian.
- It's a really controversial answer.

It's not controversial.
It's the right answer.

It's very controversial.

And that's fine
that it's controversial.

I... they don't exist.

How's that sound?

- Yeah!
- Is that it?

You're a very handsome...
handsome gentleman.

So are you. I'm glad you think so.

I mean, it's kind of a fact.

All right, y'all. Anyone who's here
for two step lessons

make your way down
to the dance floor.

We'll get started.

Welcome.
This is double or nothing two step.

My name is Vanessa.

Anybody who wants to lead

y'all can line up
on this side of the dance floor.

And make a line for me here.

Hey, buddy.

And then anyone who would like
to learn the part, how to follow.

Okay, put your right hand leads

on your follows' left shoulder blade.

The lead's going to take
his lead hand.

Leads, leading.
Follows, letting them lead. Ready?

Seven. Eight. Slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

- All right.
- I need her to say it out loud.

Slow, slow, quick, quick, slow...

Quick, quick, slow, slow...

So, like, with this whole experience

like, are you looking
for anything specific out of it

or, like, what's kind of your...

you know what I mean?
Like, what's your mindset like?

- Like...
- Totally.

I would love to meet someone that
I can actually spend some time with.

I mean, I wanna get married
and have babies

and do all of those things.

But it has to be
the right person, right?

I'm not gonna, like,
to force anything.

I like that.

- Do you wanna hang out?
- Yeah, absolutely.

- Let's go.
- Cool.

- Do you wanna see my dog?
- Yeah.

- Isn't he the cutest thing ever?
- He's a sweetie.

Look at that little face.

I mean, come on, look at those eyes.

Isn't that the cutest thing ever?

It's like a teddy bear.

He's the best.
Like, such a cliché dog dad.

No, it's sweet.

Personally, if I were to scope
out my life for the next few years

I'd probably be with a guy and a dog.

- With a dog?
- We don't have kids.

We have a dog, right?

What are you thinking?

What is it you want out of life then?

Gosh, so heavy.

- I mean, heck, we're here, so...
- Second date, wow.

I mean...

You know, I... I want a family.

You do?

I kind of always have
wanted to have kids, like

as long as I can remember.

I want to build something, you know?

- It's nice, yeah.
- Yeah.

Yeah. I thought I did
for a long time and then

my whole life

I've just been wanting
to be more selfish.

Not in a, like

too self-centered way,
but I just think

I barely know what it's like
to feel secure in my own life.

And then, to do that for other people

not only is a lot of responsibility

but I don't know if I want to yet.

That door is closed forever

or that's like,
it's where you're at now?

I think it should be an active want.
It shouldn't be a passive.

I was vegetarian for ten years

and I'm not vegetarian anymore,
but I would say, like

at least 75% of my meals
are vegetarian.

And then I eat a steak
every now and then, you know?

Oh, yeah.

- Really go for it.
- Yeah.

Once in a while, you got to go...
you got to go hard.

Once in a while,
you got to go to Mardi Gras.

Do you have other sayings that
you like? I bet you have a million.

You probably have
a whole book of sayings.

I do sometimes.

God willing and the creek don't rise.

God willing...

God willing and the creek don't rise.

God willing and the creek don't rise.

Creek don't rise.

You said you're doing,
like, shows and everything.

I'm playing Monday,
Wednesday, Friday.

I do like to... I see a lot
of live music, actually.

There's a hotel in New York
called the Carlyle

and they have live jazz all the time.

And it's so old New York, elegant

piano player, stand up bass

beautiful music.

And I love my once a year
go to New York trip

to appreciate where I am

but I don't want to live there.

Well, God willing
and the creek don't rise.

God willing and the creek don't rise.

- All right.
- All right.

- Goodbye.
- It was good to see you.

You too.

I've never really gone out
with someone like Phil before.

He has a much more
relaxed kind of pace

and I'm much more, like

excited and enthusiastic.

There's more to meets the eye
in Reagan.

How 'bout that?

Honestly, no one seems
to really understand me.

So I'm like, "Man...

nobody seems to like me or get me."

Don? Yeah. Don gets me.

So...

I sent Don a photo of me

in the outfit that
I was wearing today

to go on a date with another man.

And he liked it. And then
he sent me some voice notes

that I'm going to play.

You're so f*cking cute.

Well, I hope you have fun tonight
on your hot date.

Those boots and everything
are looking good.

Looking good, Reagan.

He's so cute.

- So cute.
- So funny.

All right, I'm gonna heart these.

He's not jealous enough.

- I'm just kidding.
- He's not jealous enough.

I would normally say that to him.
"You're not jealous enough," but...

I'm afraid that...

I'm afraid that that's too flirty.

You know?

Maybe tomorrow I'll send him a video
of me jumping on the trampoline

in a short skirt.

Showers are always tough.

Because the head... Yeah, so,
a lot of times I have to kinda...

Oh, my God.

Wait, you don't have an accent.
Do people in Kentucky...

- Or maybe I just don't hear it.
- It comes out occasionally, like

when I say Louisville, people are,
like, "What the f*ck is that?"

That was the only time
I noticed it yesterday and today.

Yeah, I totally... totally get that.

It sounds so ridiculous.

It's an L and you just kind of
jumble it up together.

- Ridiculous?
- Ridiculous but...

That's honestly how I feel, like...

- Hey.
- Hi. How are you?

- I'm good. How are you?
- I like your outfit. It's cute.

You too. Are you cold?

Thanks for coming.

I bought some boots. Did you notice?

- Oh, yeah. Those are cute.
- Yeah, like I was... I came for it.

Yeah. I mean, I had a good time.

Thought it'd be cool
to hang out before I leave again.

Yeah, I was, like,
I was so nervous beforehand.

Honestly, I was like...

- Yeah, it's very nerve wracking.
- But I'm like...

No, it was fun, it was fun. Yeah.

- You were, like, great conversation.
- Yeah.

I called my friends after. I was like

"Oh, my God, you guys, I liked her."

- Cool. I liked you too.
- Yeah.

- Thank God.
- I mean, we're here.

Yeah. It was really fun
talking to you.

- You seem like a cool person.
- Yeah.

- What have y'all been up to?
- We went to...

a protest or, like, a rally.

- Oh, where?
- At the capital.

- Okay.
- For trans rights, trans kids.

So that was really, really beautiful.

- Safe!
- Safe!

- Safe!
- Safe!

- Those new laws that are happening
- Yeah.

are really taking a toll
on the energy here

- to be honest.
- I was gonna ask you.

How is it, like, living here?

It's like... it's like that's scary.

Yeah. I mean, it felt like that
at the capital.

- It was very intense.
- Yeah.

Texas is cool
in a lot of ways, and...

f*cked up.

Wait, so, how long have you been...

- I don't even know what to call it.
- On this journey?

On this journey.
How long have you been doing this?

- Three weeks.
- Okay.

- That's cool.
- It's fun.

- So you all are traveling together?
- All together.

- And staying together?
- Yeah.

- They're doing the same thing?
- Yeah.

I cannot imagine...

Honestly, it's, like, confusing
how I've gone my entire life

- not knowing them, in many ways.
- Y'all feel, like, so close.

- Yeah, it's crazy.
- I love that.

- You know what I mean? Like...
- Yeah.

What kind of movies do you like?

- Well, I'm a big movie person.
- I know. That's... me, too.

Hold on.
I'm gonna show you something.

Okay.

My friend has the spreadsheet
of, like, all these l*sbian movies.

- Wait, I love that.
- I'll share it with you.

Okay. First of all

if you wanted to have
a l*sbian movie marathon

- it would be exhausting.
- It would be so exhausting.

- It's either gonna, like, be, like
- Yeah.

- so boring
- Yeah.

- Or depressing.
- Or so sad.

Yeah. Everyone dies.

Oh, my God.

- This was fun.
- Well, keep me updated.

I will. Yeah.

- I'll walk you to your car.
- Okay.

I would say the date was good.

I probably could've talked to her
for another two hours.

I think she'd be a good time.

I think we would actually have fun.

- This was awesome.
- It was nice seeing you again.

I would like to get to know her.

- I'm sure I'll see you again.
- Yeah, I'll see you...

- soon-ish, maybe.
- I might see you soon-ish.

Yeah, I don't know.
I just said that but...

I would like to see you soon-ish.
We'll figure it out.

Yeah, okay. Have fun tonight.

All right.

- Bye. Have fun.
- Bye.

A quarter pound of brisket
and a quarter pound of pulled pork.

That's half a pound.

She can do fractions.

Everybody smile.

- Wow. The wind.
- Ooh, it's actually working for us.

I literally can't with you.
You're so extra right now.

- I've had the best time here.
- How was your week, yeah?

It was great.

With Ryan, it's exciting
because I feel like

he's a Southern gentleman,
and I was not expecting

to actually, like, meet up
with someone like that.

Ryan has, like, perfect lips.

Ryan has...
Is just looks like a Ken doll.

But, like, manly.

- He's like Captain America.
- Yeah.

I think Ryan surprised you
a lot too, though, right?

The more you got to know him,
the more you were intrigued.

Yeah. He's like...
I haven't stayed up

talking to someone that late,
in, like, so, so long.

It was hot.

So are we inviting him to NOLA?

New Orleans?
Oh, yeah? Wow, how exciting.

It's funny that
you're talking about Ryan.

You know, he is such a gentleman.

I don't really feel like most
of the guys I've been out with

have been that gentlemanly.

It seems like they don't
really know how to, like...

be on a date with an elegant woman

such as myself.

Yeah.

Don is the exception.
Don is a lovely, lovely person

and he seemed to understand me.

He gave me time
to speak and everything.

He asked me about myself.

I would be interested
in seeing him in another city.

I'm thinking about New Orleans
or Santa Fe.

Tell me about your date.

Nicholas is someone I really respect.

He's really handsome.
There's a lot I admire about him.

But personally,
I don't think I really want kids.

Of course I want partnership.

But he just wasn't the match for me.

I was smitten
after Date Zero, though.

It kind of sucks.

- Here you go.
- Oh, thank you!

The one with the extra bun
have no onions.

- Oh, perfect.
- Wicked. What is everything?

- Thank you.
- These are the tacos.

- It's mac and cheese.
- Yeah, yeah.

Look at this fat...
Look at this healthy boy.

Big boy.

- Austin is so cool.
- I know. The food is like...

- It's been great.
- Yeah, the food is so good.

I wonder what the boys
are going to be like in New Orleans.

My only hope is that I

meet people
who are very conversational.

Yeah. Totally.

With Larry, like,
we definitely had, like, a moment

where we really connected
and it was really nice.

I think it was just meant to be
for the time that I was in Miami.

Ryan, he has such a...
Like, a warm presence to him.

And it's so pure.

He just feels very pure.

It's so f*cking cute.

Like, I can't even handle it.

I kind of joked with him

that he should just follow me around
for the next couple of weeks.

I would be shocked if I met someone
that I wanted to spend time with

more than I do with Ryan.

I am interested in Don.

I just... I'm super g*n-shy.

Something I'm learning
through this experience is that

I'm not that careless with dating.

And I do take
a great deal of responsibility

when it comes to
someone else's feelings.

So I keep them at a distance
until I feel safe enough.

Like, if I trust my feelings
for them, that's a big one.

I just know what I'm comfortable with

and I respond to that.

I think that this journey
actually incentivizes me

to be looking forward to what's next.

I'm still interested in Derek.

But, like, I don't want to say "no"

to what could happen
in New Orleans, either.

I think I'm starting to
get in the groove of this.

And I feel like if there's
any city to loosen me up

it's probably going to be
New Orleans, to be honest.

So, it'll be fun.

What's happening? Tell me everything.

In my life?

So, before this experience,
I'm sitting at home.

It's like a week before I'm leaving

and I come across
that I have a new "Like."

I was just bored one day
and I opened it

and I'm like,
"Oh, my God, she's so pretty."

- What's her name?
- Jess.

Look. She's cute.

Oh, yeah. Those are my favorite.

Does she look like that in real life?

She does. So I was like...

"Holy sh*t."

The premise of the date,
honestly, was of a hookup.

But we just had,
like, instant chemistry.

So I told her I'm going
on a journey across America

to date people.

And I'm trying to allow
myself to be open.

I mean, I was leaving New York
to have a connection

and I ended up creating connection
right before I left.

Like, why? Like, why?

I feel like I'm getting to know her.

And I just kind of wanna know,
does it work or does it not?