02x20 - Mango THC Gummies, $18

[bunniefuu]

Tom's agent had sent
his book out to publishers,

and while she tried
to drum up offers,

all he could do
was wait for news.

Patiently.

Sorry, wasn't my agent,
but good news:

My socks finally shipped.

Sorry.

There's a 40% chance of rain
in the Bay Area tomorrow.

The worst part was that,
with his novel done,

the only writing he was doing
was in a recycled journal

that his sister bought him.

I can't do this.
It's degrading.

Hey, you chose
to be a writer.

No, I'm saying
literally, it's...

look, it's degrading.

Still haven't heard anything?
How are you holding up?

You know Tom.
He's a rock.

Whoa, hang on.

- This is it!
- Oh!

Whoa.

We've lost a lot
of good mugs this week.

False alarm.

I could've sworn
I felt it vibrate.

Sarah's has been
the same way.

She hasn't gotten any sleep.

She's nervous about
the musical tonight.

- I wouldn't say "nervous."
- Really? You're not nervous?

Oh, no, I am.
I just wouldn't say it.

- It makes it worse.
- Oh, sorry.

It's just, I want everyone
to love "Unsung Sheroes:

"A Musical Celebration
of Groundbreaking Women

from Sacagawea to So to mayor."

Did the title get longer?

It did, and so did the show.

And I was not involved
with the rewrites.

Hey, there's nothing
to be nervous about, okay?

If anything goes wrong,
I already taught Gretchen

some sweet break dance moves.

You didn't really do that,
did you?

Gretchen?

Gretchen, honey!

My boss has been making me
work so late,

I'm looking forward
to a three-hour show.

I can catch up on some sleep.

- It's actually 3 1/2 hours.
- Yes.

Well, if you sleep
through Gretchen's performance,

Emily has them recording it,
so just let me know.

- I'll sh**t you the link.
- Oh, yeah.

'Cause she's in Paris
with her new boy... mm-mm.

- Boy... mm-mm?
- Boyfriend.

Yeah, it's okay.

Ex-wives are allowed
to have boyfriends.

Because JoJo's gone
and I'm all alone

and not in Paris
with my boyfriend

doesn't mean I'm sad
or resentful

or upset or anything like that.

Haven't been getting
much sleep, though.

- Must be a Hayworth thing.
- They're a fragile people.

Oh, here we go.

This is it.
Hello?

Yep.

Okay.

- This is actually your phone.
- Oh.

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
*HOME ECONOMICS*

*HOME ECONOMICS*
Season 02 Episode 20

Episode Title: " Mango THC Gummies, $18"
Aired on: April 20, 2022.

Okay, have fun
with your cousins, okay?

- Pórtate bien.
- Sí, voy.

Lupe, thank you so much
for watching the kids.

Camila's so excited
about the show

and the sleepover.

Yes, me too.

- Christmas came early.
- Great.

Hmm.
Vamos. Andale.

So we're free to make
this night a little more... fun.

- Uh-huh.
- Tom, enough with the phone.

Sorry, it's just,
you know, the book.

Yeah, it's done.
You worked hard.

You wrote something great.
So now you deserve to relax.

We deserve to relax.

So... I got us these.

Um, we're not allowed

to bring outside food
into the theatre.

They're pot gummies.

They're... pot?

Relax, narc.
It's legal now.

On a state level,

but federally,
it's a mixed bag.

I'm so--I'm just surprised.

I mean, it's been forever
since we've done--

Where'd you even get it?

One of the mums
in play group.

- Eliza?
- Obviously.

Come on, it'll get your mind
off of the book

and my mind off of wanting
to strangle you

when you talk about the book.

A'ight, I'll do it.

I'm doing it.

I'm doing it.

Nah, I'm not doing it.

I want to stay sharp
in case my agent calls.

What if there's
a time-sensitive

Saturday night book offer--

Yeah, sorry, I can't do this.

I'll see you on the other side.

Tonight's gonna fly by, huh?

It's supposed to be
really long.

Yeah, that was a joke.

Mm, sorry.
I'm just kind of out of it,

you know, being
the only single guy

at one of these things.

I didn't want to say anything,

but I've been feeling
kind of down lately.

- You've been hiding it well.
- Thank you.

That was also a joke.
Is my timing off today?

I mean, I'm happy
that Emily's moving on.

I am. I'm happy for her.

- That's great. That's so great.
- Yeah.

And, you know,
when I was with JoJo,

it felt like
I was moving on too.

Yeah, it seemed like you and
JoJo were meant for each other.

Mm, that was a joke.

It was.
She's back!

Yeah, tonight, I'm just
gonna focus on Gretchen

and not think
about relationships.

There he is.

Windmount's
most eligible bachelor.

The ladies and I were
looking for you all over.

Yeah.

Well, you found me.

Denise, this is Margot.

We were just talking
about how crazy it is

that this guy is still single.

Really?
That's what you all talk about?

Yes. Connor,
I'm gonna make it my mission

to set you up with someone.

- Oh, please don't.
- Oh.

- I'm gonna go find Sarah.
- Please don't.

You know who's going
through an ugly divorce?

- Mm?
- Linda Keebler.

Oh.

Sorry. So sorry.

Ten minutes to places, guys.

I'm a lady and a pilot,

but don't call me
a lady pilot, buster.

- Ooh, sounds good, Gretchen.
- Thanks.

- Hey, Lulu.
- Hi.

It's a packed house
out there.

- How are you feeling?
- Yeah, yeah.

No, I'm good.
I'm good.

You know,
I thought I would have

some opening night jitters,

but I think
because I was so nervous

leading up to this that--

That I think I got it all
out of my system,

so now,
everything's gonna be fine.

- It's not.
- Oh!

Hi.

Denise, this is Lauren.

She's vice principal
here at Windmount.

- You seem fun.
- I'm not.

Listen,
hate to burst your bubble,

but Ethan can't run the lights.

His parents just got divorced

and his dad took him
to Disney World.

Oh, no.
What happens now?

Well, I imagine
Ethan will live with his mum.

Well, things could change
with this trip.

No, I mean with the lights.

Oh.

I guess I will take care of it.

- You'd do that?
- I mean, it's sort of my job.

And also, you know,
I love the students.

Picking up
a slight bit of sarcasm.

Mm-hmm.

Here come the jitters.

Okay, no, it's fine.
It's fine.

- Mm-hmm.
- Nothing else will go wrong.

Sarah,
something's gone wrong.

Felt myself jinxing it
as I was saying it.

We had to cancel the catering
from Carl's Cantina.

Ooh, that's like
a vocal warmup.

Carl's Cantina's
catering's canceled--

- Okay, Zarrow, what happened?
- Bad batch of romaine.

Oh, okay.

So parents will just
have to sit

through a three-hour musical
on an empty stomach.

Don't worry,
your assistant director

will be right by your side.

Wait, scratch that, I think
I'm about to be violently ill.

Oh, no, you didn't--

I may have had lunch
at Carl's Cantina.

They're known
for their lettuce cups.

Break legs. Kisses.

Ooh, I'm in real trouble.
Ooh!

Oh, it's fine.
I'm fine.

- It's gonna be fine.
- Mm-hmm.

She must have fallen
into a sinkhole.

- Who?
- My agent.

She must have been
driving along,

about to call me,
when the Earth just opened up

and swallowed her whole.

It's literally
the only explanation.

Okay, I'm taking
your gummy too.

You sure that's a good idea?

It's fine.

Worst case, I fall asleep.

Which is also best case.

Marina!

That's weird.
It's already kicking in.

I thought I just heard my boss.

Marina! Marina!

And now I think
I'm seeing my boss.

Wait, that's Robot Richard?

Yep,
he's utterly emotionless.

Marina, I thought
that was you, and it was.

What a pleasant surprise.

What are you doing here?

I mean, Richard, hi!

What are you--
What are you doing here?

I have a niece in the show.

She's playing Clara Barton,
the founder of the Red Cross.

As you can tell,
I'm over the moon.

- Huh.
- Our niece is in the show too.

What a funny coincidence,
Marina.

I'm very excited
that we ran into each other.

- Are you?
- Don't I sound excited?

Oh, no, yeah.
No, very.

The cidery case
has me concerned.

It's making me really agitated.
I'd love to discuss it further.

Absolutely.
First thing on Monday.

Yeah, she'll just
kind of circle back on Monday.

Why wait?
Let's talk during intermission.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I don't want to miss this.

The thought of seeing my niece
on stage is quite special.

Sorry to get so emotional.

Pull it together, Richard.

Huh.

Wow.
That'll be interesting.

At intermission,
you're gonna be high as a kite.

It's fine.
I just took one.

- You took two.
- Oh, right.

This thing says
the dosage is--half a gummy?

Why the hell
would they do that?

Oh, my God, that's why
I can't feel my hands.

Oh, crap.
Can you feel my hands?

Yes, I can feel your hands.

Okay, then maybe
we'll be okay.

Hey.
How are you guys doing?

I'm high
and I can't feel my hands.

Great, sweet.

Hey, do you mind
if I sit with you guys?

I'm trying to avoid
this woman--

Hey, stranger.
Where have you been?

Definitely not hiding,
that's for sure.

Come sit with us.
We hate to see you alone.

Oh, um, yeah.
No, I just--

Bro, I got my own thing.

I don't know
if Linda's for me.

Oh, then what about Suzanne?

Her husband just went to jail
for insider trading.

- That could be something.
- Mm.

Yeah, I just--I don't know
how to say this, but...

I don't know if any
of the single mums

at this school are
what I'm looking for.

Oh, yes.
I completely understand.

Um, my new husband,
he does travel a great deal.

I have an apartment
in the city.

It's just me... and my birds.

Yeah.

What's that?

Hmm? Show's starting?
No more talking?

- Oh, I gotta go sit down.
- Okay, let's go get cozy.

- Oh, okay, um...
- No.

And you're following me.
Okay.

All right.
Five minutes, people.

Okay.
You seem good.

Yeah, you know,
things go wrong.

This is live theatre.

You know?

So my assistant director
locked himself in the bathroom

and the parents are starving

and Lauren has to learn
all of those light cues

that took us weeks to plan,

but the show must go on.

Miss Sarah,
I can't find my earrings.

What?

She just said
she can't find her earrings.

She needs
those chunky earrings.

How is she--
How is anyone gonna know

that she's Geraldine Ferraro
without those chunky earrings?

Isn't the first line
of the song,

"The sun will come up Ferraro"?

That could mean anything!

Who am I kidding?

This is just off the rails.

Okay, so we're not
in a place of logic right now.

Everyone is gonna
see me fail.

The parents, the teachers,

that critic from
"The Fourth Grade Chronicle"

who's so snotty.

He just tears
every performance apart.

This is gonna be a disaster.

- It's gonna be a disaster?
- What?

No, honey,
that's not what I meant--

I don't think I can do this!

Two minutes, everyone.

Okay, we might be
in trouble now.

Yeah, she's the first number
of the show,

- so I'm gonna go--
- I'm on it.

- Yep.
- Okay.

Okay, let's lose the clouds.

Get the "votes for women" sign.

Cady Stanton, you're up.

I found my earrings.
They were in my pocket.

Oh, you're k*lling me,
Ferraro.

♪ Women should vote free ♪

- Wow.
- I know.

It makes you think, but it also
gets your toes tapping.

No, I mean
I can really feel it.

Okay.
Let's take it down a notch.

Your boss is looking at us.

♪ I'm so tired of faking ♪

♪ A democracy
that can't live free ♪

♪ Without you and me ♪

She fell down.

She died of heart failure.

Oh, wow.

She was so young.

Okay.

Mr. Hayworth?

Oh, Vice Principal Lauren.

I was just, um--you mind
if I watch in the booth?

Sure.
Margot won't find you here.

Oh, you saw that?

Yeah, she gave me the key
to her apartment.

There's a lot of those
in the lost and found.

I just needed a break
from all these people.

I don't blame you.

They're the worst.

Shouldn't the vice principal
at least,

I don't know,
pretend to like the parents?

You know what,
that's actually--

Huh,
that's a really good point.

No problem.

No, I'm gonna take that
with me.

Thanks so much.

See, that was me pretending.

- Oh, wow.
- Yep.

I was convinced.

What am I doing back here?

I should be up there.

It's a waste of talent.

Is that bourbon?

Welcome to the booth.

All right.

Gretchen.
Hey, hey.

Hey, Gretchen.

Aunt Sarah was
just being silly, okay?

Nothing is gonna be a disaster

as long as you get out
on that stage very soon.

But I'm really scared.

Okay.

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

What am I gonna do?

Aren't you a child therapist?

Yeah, and?

I am! Right, duh.

So I'll just--yep. Okay.

Hey, Gretch. Okay.

So let's play a little game,
all right?

We are going
to visualise your fear

so you can conquer it.

So close your eyes.

Now, I want you to picture

all the things that could
go wrong out there, okay?

Now what do you see?

I'm forgetting my lines,
messing up my song,

knocking over the set,

my pants fell down,
and everyone laughs at me.

- Also, there's a fire.
- Okay.

Are we gonna
forget our lines?

I don't want my pants
to fall down.

You're the top half
of Julia Child.

You don't have any pants.

Oh, no!

No--okay.
Hold on.

This is just the first part
of the exercise, okay?

The next part is that we--

We visualize
everything going right,

like applause and acceptance.

- They're all running away.
- Wait, you can't leave.

Julia Child's supposed to be
on stage right now.

Where is her bottom half?

What the hell is happening?

Don't worry.
We're all seeing this.

Why doesn't it speak?

Julia Child is famously tall,

and I guess the top half
does the singing.

Uh, and ladies and gentlemen,
that is intermission.

Okay.

Wow, this show is flying by.

What are you talk--
It's been two songs.

Something's gone wrong.

Come on.
Maybe Richard knows what's up.

- Hey, Richard.
- Hey, what are you doing?

We're trying to avoid him.

Right.

It's just that that guy
looks a lot like my boss.

What--it is your boss!

- Come on.
- Oh.

Um, wait, why is it
already intermission?

Who cares?

Let's just take our wins
where we can get 'em.

You're a pretty calm person.

I mean, it is
an elementary school musical,

so the stakes are pretty high.

Should we call the mayor?

Well, Denise says,
"Everything is under control."

Although it is in all caps.

I'm sure it's fine,

but if you wanna talk
real emergencies,

we have no food.

Oh, no, I got us covered.

Drawer-D'oeuvres.

Belt nut?

Actually, sure.

What do you mean,
there's no food?

- Not even chicken nuggies?
- Focus up.

We can't let your boss
see you like this.

Well, that's why
we should stand still.

I told you, that's a myth.

Steven Spielberg made it up
for "Jurassic Park."

And your boss
is not a dinosaur.

Hey, have you seen Sarah?

I thought she was backstage,
but I can't find her.

No, but that
gives me an idea.

Can you hide Marina backstage

so her boss
doesn't see her high?

Oh, so we're both
having a night.

- Oh, yeah.
- Well, where is she?

She's--

Not here.

You lost your wife?

You lost your wife!

That's fair.

Okay, kids, please,
I am literally begging you.

Please open this door.

Hey, there you are.
How's it going?

Really bad.
Really bad.

Um, I was so desperate

that everything would
go off without a hitch

that now
it's not even going off.

Well, nothing's
gonna be perfect,

and no one expects this to be.

I was.
I was expecting it to be.

Guys!

Lulu, listen.

When my second graders
draw a picture

of some squiggly lines,

their parents love it
because they don't know

their kid was trying
to draw a horse.

Okay, I know that this is
supposed to be profound,

but what are you trying to say?

Stop obsessing

over what the show's
supposed to be

and get those kids out there
and make some squiggly lines!

- Also, the door's unlocked.
- I was gonna try that.

Yeah. Hi, guys!

She's been on this show
called "Influencer Lagoon"

for the last couple weeks,

and... I don't know
if it's just the editing,

but I feel like
there's something

between her and Lil Taytay.

Yeah, there was
definitely a spark

when they were playing
that game, Hashtag You're It.

It's a bad show.

Anyway, I guess it's just
been a bit of a tough year

since the divorce.

Oh, you will get over that.

Being divorced is the best.

You have nobody to answer to.

Like tonight, after this,

I'm gonna go home,
I'm gonna take a bath,

and eat a chunk of cheese
like it's an apple.

Maybe you're right.

Maybe I need to eat
more bath cheese

and stop chasing some feeling

that always seems
to end up in sadness.

Now you're getting it.

Feelings are for dummies.

Hey, pistachio me?

Ooh!

So do we file a subpoena
on their tax records now

or wait on a full audit
on the value of the property

before filing a motion
to disclose?

Hmm. Wow.
That's a great question.

Such a weird word, "question."

It's like a quest is on
for answers.

Richard, hi. Hi.
Should we get back in there?

Oh, do you hear that?
I think it's starting.

I'm obviously excited to see
the top half of Julia Child,

but I'd like to hear
Marina's response.

Uh, okay.

Well, Richard...

Like, what is property?

- Yikes.
- You know?

Like, do we own it,

or in a way, does it own us?

That doesn't make much sense.

Yeah, well, I think

what she's trying to say
is that--

Property is
an abstract concept.

- No.
- I'm trying to follow you,

but it's incredibly difficult.

Fine. I'm super high.

- Marina--
- Yeah.

I was supposed
to relax tonight.

Tom was supposed to relax.

We were all supposed to relax,
but we can't

because we're all paranoid
about you and your questions.

Questions, questions.

Hey, hey.
We're very sorry, okay?

She would never be like this
at work.

- You know that.
- The quest is on.

- She's a very serious person.
- Quest on!

Marina, I'm gonna have
to ask you to stop right there.

Because I too am super high
right now.

- Say what?
- What?

I'm tripping ba*ls.

I ate two THC-enhanced
sour straws.

It's a 3 1/2 hour musical,
Marina.

That's unacceptable.
I thought you would've known

by the outrageous way
I was acting.

- No, not really.
- No.

This is how you always are,
Richard.

It's kind of you
to lie like that.

The only reason I was
talking about work so much is,

I was covering for

how absolutely blazed I am
right now.

Just blitzed out of my skull.

I'm higher than Jerry Garcia
on the space shuttle.

- Nailed it.
- Right.

Well, great.

I can't believe
you're both high.

Don't be such a square, Tom.

Now, can you help me back
to my seat?

- I can't feel my legs.
- I can't feel my hands.

Okay, well, let's get
you guys back to your seats.

Stick together.
I don't want to lose anyone.

Okay, that's enough food.
Ooh, got you, buddy.

Come on. This way.

Look, I can't promise

that everything
will go perfectly,

but it doesn't matter
if you remember your words

or all your dance moves.

What's important is that
you just go out there

and you have fun, okay?

That is perfection.

And everyone who performs
gets candy!

It's an old teacher trick.

What type of candy?
Is it artisanal?

I can't do dairy.

Oh, I hate this school.

♪ Women, oh, women
ain't treated so good ♪

♪ The music biz
may be run by men ♪

♪ But I built Dolly wood ♪

♪ Me and Venus
are out on the court ♪

I wrote that.

♪ Breaking barriers
in this white sport ♪

♪ I'm still out there
flying high ♪

Oh, look how good she looks.
She's so cute.

♪ So don't think of this
as a last goodbye ♪

Hey, sorry I stressed you out
for nothing tonight.

I just really wanted
to get your mind off the book.

No, honey, it's okay.
Look, it kind of worked.

I mean, I haven't
looked at my phone in hours.

Wait.

Oh, my God.

I--I have an offer!

- That's amazing, honey!
- Oh--

- Honey.
- What?

- Whoa.
- It's amazing!

Oh!
Let's go, Gretch!

Go bow.
Go bow.

- No, no, they did--
- You did this!

Okay, I did.
I did do this.

Where the hell am I?

Thank you.
This is the best.

Oh!
I thought you were sick.

I never miss a curtain call.

Oh, no.
Here comes my encore.

Okay.

That was actually okay.

Hey, from you,
that's a rave review.

I mean, I feel like
the lighting

was really the star.

Hey, thanks for the drink,

and, you know, making me
feel better about being alone.

Oh, ain't no shame
in being alone, chief.

Tom, you need to take me
to the hospital.

No, no, you're fine.
You're fine.

Oh, wow.

- It's just the belt buckle.
- Oh, gotcha.

♪ A gorilla won't k*ll ya ♪

♪ He'll just
give you a thriller ♪

♪ But, man, oh, man ♪

♪ Is the most
dangerous animal ♪

♪ Of them all ♪

What the hell is going on?

I think
it's about Dian Fossey,

but done in the style
of Bob Fosse.

I hate this school.

Is that
Daddy's birthday gorilla?

♪ And all that jazz ♪

♪ Happy birthday, Tom ♪